Hundred percent. Jimmy Carlby here on 15. Let's start the episode.

Let's start the episode. We saw Jimmy Carr.

We saw Jimmy Carr last night. He scared the fuck out of me. Saturday.

Saturday.

I saw him at the big Netflix party.

Yeah.

This week is. Netflix is a roast. Netflix is a joke.

Yeah. Yeah, we did the roast, but it was. It is Netflix as a joke.

We're gonna talk about the roast today.

We'll talk about the roast, because he's a roast master for sure. And he was there. Not in the roast. Um, but he was in the audience. I was looking at him a lot. Always very well dressed. I'm sure he's going to show up just sharp as can be.

What do you want to. Can I. Before we get into the roast stuff, can we talk about Jimmy Carr?

Sure.

Do you know much about his story? I don't know if we're allowed to talk about this. I don't know. Like. I don't know. I don't know him very well. I remember. Do you remember when we met him?

Uh, when we met him in Montreal?

How do you say it?

Montreal.

You're saying it wrong.

Well, that's how you say it for them.

Yet. We're Americans.

I know, but we're saying it.

And if they want us to not take it from them, then we'll say it our way.

Montreal.

Montreal.

Well, we were in Montreal for the.

Was it Melbourne?

Melbourne.

Melbourne.

It's Melbourne.

Is it Ibiza?

No, it's Ibiza. Crowd loved when I did Spanish, by the way.

Yeah, they did.

That was. I was surprised.

I did not expect that.

I think they thought it was like a fucking parlor trick.

He's like a. When we met him in Montreal.

Yeah.

And he walked into the groom, I.

Just realized you could also do Montreal.

Montreal. I hate when they talk French.

When they talk French? Yeah. It's their first language there. No, it's not.

No, no, no, it's not.

In Montreal, it is.

They talk French. French. The same way you talk Spanish. They can talk French.

Some of them speak poor English.

Bull. Yeah, because they're lazy.

That is. That could be argued, but it's first language is.

If your sister only spoke Spanish, you'd be like, you don't get out enough. You just hang out with mom.

That's true.

That's who they are.

Well, they're not getting their city. Their city is French.

I want to party with your sister so bad. Jane and Maria, both of them. With you. With you.

I just partied. Well, I just hung out with Jane. And my mom, they came to the show in, in Canada.

Do you know we were planning a surprise party for you?

When?

For your birthday.

For my birthday?

Yeah, we were gonna plan a surprise party for you. And I. And. Cuz I think Maria was like, oh, it'll drive him crazy.

Yeah.

And I was like, oh, so how is that fun?

If I show up, it'll make him out of his fucking mind.

But how would that be a good thing?

Cuz it was for us.

Yeah, exactly. Yes.

We should go on a family trip.

You with my family?

Yeah, you know me. No, no, I was gonna take my family too. My family. Let's do a cruise. My family and your family. I bring my sisters and you bring your sisters and you're. And you bring your mom and bring my dad and my mom. Oh, it'd be so much fun.

For who?

For me? I'd love it. I would fucking love it.

Oh, my God.

Let's get back to Montreal.

Well, I'll tell you this. Jane and my mom were like, my mom was like trying to take blankets from the fucking hotel. And she like, you know all. She's like, I'm taking this. I'm like, you can't take it, but it doesn't belong to you. And she's like, can I take this cup? And I'm like, no. And she goes, can you buy it? I go, no, it's not for sale. It's a fucking cup. It's like, it's the coffee cup in the room. And she was like, why can't I take it? Because it's not yours. It belongs to this property. And she was like, they can't. They have other ones. I go, that's not how this works. You sound like a fucking child. Like, this is what a toddler would think.

This is my impression of my mom hanging out with your mom. Okay. Yeah, you talk like your mom and I'll be my mom. It's so nice to meet you.

It's so nice to meet you too.

So nice to meet you, too.

Yeah, Jess.

Okay.

Yes.

Oh, it's nice too. She's got a funny accent.

That's what your mom would say.

Yeah, she's done that. She's done that before. Like, we went to an italian restaurant. The guy was, hey, would you like a little, you know, my dad. My mom goes, I like a little spaghetti. I go, mom, what the fuck are you doing? She goes, they like it.

They like it.

Sure makes them feel like we've got more comfort.

I told you the story about the italian guy. Right at the restaurant.

No.

I didn't tell you this?

No.

A few months back. I never told you this?

No.

When I walked in to this italian restaurant, the guy, it was in Jersey, and he was tan, black hair spiked with gel, like, up here. It looked like real Jersey shore shit. And he looked like a southern italian guy, right? And he was like. And I was like, oh, Jesus Christ. And he was super theatrical. And so we sit down, and he cuts fresh pecorino, and he puts it on the plate, and he's like, prego, prego, bravo, prego. I was like, this fucking guy's just off the boat, you know, and he's like, we have this most amazing bucatini la Marciano. Today we have spaghetti Avaloniers. It's going to make your fucking asshole shit. It's so good in bronzino. It flies in from the Mediterranean. Incredible. And so he walks.

You're in this character, by the way.

I mean, it was so, like, dramatic. He walks away. We're like, this guy is amazing. So I had been, at the time, doing italian on multiple apps on my phone for, like, I don't know, probably nine months or a year. So, I mean, super elementary. But, like, you know, I have basic things down. So I'm like. I mean, I'm nervous, but I'm like, I want to. You know, the one thing you miss with apps is, like, conversation.

Yeah.

So, like, he walks up, and I was like, he comes back, and I was like, yeah, I'm going to get the bucatini. And then I go. He goes, huh? I go, ofame IO o fa me. And he goes. And I was like, I'm hungry. And he goes, bravo. And he, like, walks away. And I was like, what the fuck? So then I look it up. I'm like, maybe I said it all wrong.

Yeah.

And I said it completely right.

Yeah.

So I was like, that's fucking weird. So he comes back, and I was like, huh? I go, so where are you from? And he goes, Salvatore. I go, Salvatore? Was that like a village? He's like, no. And I go, where is that? He's like, I go, Central. Like Central of Italy? He's like, no, Central America. And I go, are you from El Salvador?

Yeah.

And I go, oh, so you're not italian? He goes, no, and he just walks away. It's a fucking full italian act that he does.

Can I tell you, we talked about this on a podcast, and I bothered me that it's something we talked about on a podcast that I can't figure out why I do it. What is. I would have never tried to call him on it. I just would have let Santa Claus be real.

Oh, yeah.

And there are certain people that go, hold on. What the fuck's happening?

Well, I didn't. I was. I didn't humiliate him.

Yeah.

I just was like. I was perplexed at why he didn't understand my simple italian phrase. And I was like, this is. And I. And I wasn't guessing that he wasn't italian at first. I was just like, oh, I must be saying this like a.

You could've spoke Spanish perfectly.

Yeah, yeah. But the best is that when he came back and after I had done that thing, he stayed 100%. He spoke English with an italian person's inflection. You know, he didn't say it like a Spanish, but he kept saying, all the year, you want to love Leo.

It's like, the way she love you, Andrew. We're talking about the roast. We were there. We love Andrew. I love the best. I love that. I won't want to out the dude, but one of the guys we were with was like, who is that guy? I said, andrew Schultz. He's like, oh, he's the white guy that black guys love.

It's true. Yeah, it's true.

He had fucking 50 cent at his MSG show.

Unbelievable.

I mean, I. And, you know, he didn't pay for it. No, 50 cent showed up out of love.

50 cent loves him.

That's fucking wild, man. It's. So he was. That. He was fun. He was fun to be fun with. Like, he celebrates.

He was great.

He was great. So let's. This is what I know about Jimmy Carr. Okay.

Yeah.

We meet him in Montreal.

Yeah.

And he. And he's doing a guest set on one show we're showcasing on or me and push, where you were doing other shows? Me and push were. You were backstage a push. And Jimmy car goes, guys just hop in and try some jokes. And they're like, yeah, of course. And you said, google his net worth. I did, yep. And I googled his net worth, and as it was on my phone, you leaned over and he goes, he's still hustling to do guest sets. He does not need to do any of this. He has a show. Six out of eight cats.

That's the name of the show.

Jimmy Carr. Real quick. He's got a big show. He's got a big tv show. He got in trouble for getting. He got canceled for a fucking joke. Did you see his response to the joke to people getting canceled. Speaker one.

He's. Listen, this guy always has the sharpest.

Wittiest, darkest, smartest, funniest, darkest.

Really, really funny guy, man. We had him on your mom's house. Oh, yeah. He was fucking incredible. He was great. Jimmy's the guy that you can bring up any topic, and he's going to know something about the history.

Go to his wikipedia. His. He's got a show.

Okay.

It's a very most popular show in Britain right now. Yeah. So it's been forever. It's called eight or nine cats or something.

Eight or nine cats.

We don't get it here, so I don't watch it.

Okay.

But it's like, a very, very popular show. All right, can you just find the name of the goddamn show? It's right there. Eight of. Eight out of. Eight out of ten cats.

That was that since 2005?

Well, yeah, I think the pandemic probably shut down production.

Okay.

But he is super the cool thing. I don't know if he'll say this on the podcast, but I'll say it, and we can never bring it up. I was at the party. I was at the big. I was at a party. I don't know, maybe. I mean, I can't remember if my memories are real or not. So, like. But someone was getting ready to do the roast, and they had their set list, all their jokes, and he said, let me take a look at that. And he grabbed their list and he went, move this. And he took his pen and he changed their set. And he goes, there you go. And it's the set they delivered, and it fucking destroyed.

Yeah.

Cause he just went through. He's a fucking tactician. He's a fucking smart guy.

Very, very sharp dude.

Do you feel like he grew up wearing knee high socks and, like, short maroons? It sure.

Sure feels like he should have, right? Yeah.

Would you be shocked?

He should be the. He's the kid. I picture saying when he was a kid, he's like, mummy, if.

If I do it right, can I.

Have some more porridge? And then she's like, you may. And then he does the thing, and then she gives him, like, another bowl.

Yeah.

He's like, jimmy has another bowl of porridge for himself.

Mommy, can I take my tea to the meadow? I'll have my tea in the meadow today.

That's exactly what it feels like.

He said he had a great. He had a great joke. I want him to say what he did, but he had a great joke about. Oh. So you can understand that I didn't mean that. Have you seen his defense of that?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It was really brilliant of, like, he's a real. He's a real, like, freedom of speech guy, which is crazy in their country. I don't think that's freedom of speech.

I don't know the laws.

We'll find out soon.

Yeah.

We should do all our interviews like this, where we do a pre interview to me and you, and then they come down and people are like, can.

We listen to all your assumptions about them? And then we check if any of them are true.

I felt like he grew.

He. He.

When I think of Jimmy Carr, I think of oil rigs, I think of Saudi Arabia, I think of him talking to sheikhs and brokering deals, and then him going, this isn't for me no more. I think I want to try stunned up, definitely.

That is very good.

He's got a posh accent.

Yeah, that wasn't, though.

No, that's not.

What you just did was not posh.

No. All right.

Yeah, that's kind of like the doc worker.

I kept saying to him. I kept saying to him, this is the best. I hope we talk about this. He was with Leanne. Leanne was fucking wasted last night.

Yeah.

And I was trying to. He couldn't understand her totally. Cause she was so drunk and redneck. And Shane Gillis kept going, you do not do a bad accent on her on stage. You're doing a very accurate accent. I go, I fucking know. She's like, shut up, Shane. He's a bully. And then I go, Jimmy, do you sense a little bit of scottish? And he goes, I sense uneducation. This episode is sponsored by DraftKings. The NBA playoffs are heating up, damn it. They are. And so is the action at DraftKings sportsbook, an official sports betting partner of the NBA teams are knocking on the door of the conference finals, and DraftKings sportsbook has you covered with every step of the way. With their same game parlays, live betting, odds, boosts, and so much more. Don't miss out. As the NBA postseason winds down, it's super easy to get started with DraftKings. If you're a first timer. Try betting on. On something like just a team. To win, go to DraftKings sportsbook app. Select your team and place your first bet. It's that simple. And if you're new to draftkings, you got to check this out. New customers bet $5 to get 150 in bonus bets instantly.

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I feel like she hasn't had read books. Is that, is that what you're looking at? Pointing that she was fucking wild last night.

Yeah, she was. Well, we should go to the beginning. So, like, we.

Let's talk about our experience with the roast. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So we get a call.

Good call, Bert.

We get a call, like, a month ago, and they say, hey, we're doing this roasted to Tom Brady. Would you be interested in doing it? And you go, I said, yes.

We're both in.

And I go, no.

You said, absolutely not.

I go, no.

You were like, there's nothing we can win out of this. Yeah.

I'm like, what are you talking about? Like, we've never been on roast. We're not roasters or anything. But then they said, we try. We're trying something different where we want you guys to do it together. And even then, I was like, you mean, like, just go to the podium together and roast together? And they were like, no, we want to do, like, we're thinking of, like, trying something that we've never done before.

I think they wanted a sports center thing first.

Yeah, yeah.

And we were like, nah, I gotta get flowers. I gave them to you last night. I'll give them to everyone. Yeah, well, you said no. And you said, you called me, said, we're not saying yes yet. We're gonna have a meeting with Netflix. We're gonna talk through with the writers.

Yeah.

And with the producers. So we got on a thing, and in a 30 minutes Zoom call, I spoke zero, which I think everyone will find shocking.

Yeah, that's true.

And you talked the whole time, and you had a million questions of things. Angles. You liked angles. You wanted to do things you were cool to do. You liked the multimedia presentation. You liked it being different than everyone else's.

Yeah.

Because you're, like, in there. You can't really draw a comparison because it's apples and oranges. So we can succeed on our own or fail on our own.

Yeah.

And then at the end, you were like, bert, do you have any. Do you have anything to say? And I said. I said yes Thursday.

Yeah, that's exactly what you said. I said yes before we had any idea what we were doing.

Yeah. Then you wrote a script.

Yeah.

You pitched your idea to me and Mike, I think.

Yeah, that's true.

And maybe I gave a couple ideas, but not a ton. And you came up with a script. You wrote a script, sent it over to Mike and me. I read it, loved it, talked to Mike, kind of punched it up, gave it to the writers. The writers punched it up a little bit. And writers punch it up a lot, I got to say. The writers on that, and the writers rage. Ray, Pat, Saratiana, Tiana, Mike Lawrence. Lawrence, Mike Gibbons, Jeff Ross, all the people that worked on that roast, and I'm sure I'm leaving people out, were fucking phenomenal and with us every step of the way, and they were pivotal in some of our favorite moments in that roast.

So the way we looked at it was like, we were kind of doing, like a. Almost like a weekend update thing where, like, we comment and we have images, which was, I thought, a fun way to do it.

It was. And it turned out. It turned out really fun. Let's talk about the drama going into it.

Well, yeah, well, let's talk about this. So then they were like, well, we have. You have to be at the rehearsal Saturday. And I was like, I have a Cincinnati show Saturday. Like a big ass show. I can't move it. Well, when can you get here? I'm like, fucking after the show. They're like, oh, then you'll miss rehearsal. And I'm like, I don't know what to tell you. So I zoomed in. I would watch the feed, and then I watched you with a stand in go through rehearsal, and we had changes in that, changing images. It was. But it was. I gotta say, it was very exciting.

Ladies and gentlemen, Jimmy Carr.

Oh, what did I tell you?

Jimmy Carr, my redneck wife.

What did I tell you? But I tell you.

Yes. Here, sit down right here, good buddy. Thank you.

Congratulations on that.

Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you.

He was. Well, we were just getting to that. First of all, he was. He just did an amazing impression of you. Yeah.

Thank you very much. Yes.

Thank you.

Good. Sorry, am I. You're not one of those cuck thing. Is this going to happen? She feels like she's. Thank you. You know what else I enjoy?

These two last night, drunk were fucking awesome.

Yeah.

With Shane Gilles in the mix. It was the fucking craziest night.

That was one of the kind of legendary comedy. That's one of the best nights I've ever had at the comedy store. And I've had some great nights there.

Yeah.

Such a brilliant. Like in the. Or, John Mulaney went up and just killed. And then Mark Norman went up, Chappelle went up. It was then me.

Wow.

Yeah, that's pretty great. Then this guy, then you. Yeah. We was talking. We were giving you a lot of.

Ladies and gentlemen, let's calm ourselves down.

Yes.

With this guy.

Yeah. No. Would you want to do your impression of Jimmy for him?

Hello, mommy. I would like to take my spot of tea at the Meadow today.

Right. So you've not watched a lot of Downton Abbey, but quite a lot of guy Ritchie films.

I have.

I'm only one of Guy Ritchie.

Yes. No, no.

He's like.

He goes, wait. He goes, Jimmy has a bit of a posh accent. I go, that wasn't posh, what you just did.

No, I mean, who thought it was gonna be the craziness?

Yeah.

Well, your craziness.

So, wait, let's talk about. Let's talk about the roast for a little bit. I'm dying to deep dive you because, like, you are one of the most elusive.

More lube.

Yeah.

Mysterious and elusive.

Yeah. Because when we met you, we were, how do you say, the city? And that they do the festival in Canada, the comedy festival. I forget.

Montreal.

How do you say it?

Montreal.

Okay. Yeah, it's Montreal.

Montreal.

Well, I was.

Take it.

It's Montreal. It's Montreal.

I gave him the canadian pronunciation, which is Montreal, and he got very upset. So, you know.

Okay, you're both sound exactly the same to me.

But Montreal.

So we first met you probably seven years ago, eight years ago in Montreal. And, uh. And we were fascinated that you were a person who had already accomplished things in life. But we're still hungry to get on mics. Like you are still do, showing up and going, can I get on the stage? And I remember both of us were like, like, he doesn't need to be here. Like, you were elusive to us. Cause we were all broke kids trying to get money and you were someone that was not looking for money. You were looking. You enjoyed stand up, the artist stand up.

Yes. It's the. I suppose it's that thing of, like, there's no equivalent for the gym time. Right. You only learn on stage. You only, you know, you can sort of. You. You.

God.

Jerry Seinfeld did a thing the other day. It was like. Did the blocks thing with Neil Brennan.

Yeah.

It's like a masterclass, really. But he was kind of talking about the idea that you get paid, you work during the day and you collect the money at night.

Yeah.

It might be Chris Rock's line originally, but they. You. So you work and kind of on these things, and then you have to try them in front of me. You just don't know, are you, what's going to hit.

And because your stuff is so methodical, calculated, like, it's all very crisp and pointed, you know, the setup, like, it's very, very sharp. I imagine that you are a pen to paper person doing this. Right. Like, there's no way that it doesn't feel, like, loose when you do it.

Yeah, but it's weird when you start in comedy, like, all the stuff that I loved was really loose storytelling.

Yeah.

And then I can't. I don't have that. I've got a fastball. Yes. And then I'm trying to expand the thing that I've been doing the last couple of years, the last special, trying to expand that kind of slightly longer bits because I love it when other people do it.

Sure.

Thank you.

But I do. I mean, you know, but I love that thing of, like, going, the idea of going out there with, you know, one story and doing an hour that'll last me 20 seconds.

I have one story, and I've done 25 years. That was the best joke.

I tell you what, I loved the improv. You know that history, the improv thing where you did the original set that you did when you got past.

Oh, yeah.

That was fantastic. I just loved it because you could sort of see the kind of the origins kind of that thing of like when you see someone, the great thing about a job is you kind of get better as you go. Like, no one that I love. In comedy, everyone does their best work in their fifties.

I've said this many times.

Isn't that.

And like, some guys, that's inspiring, too.

I think so.

Especially if you're looking at your fifties, you go like, oh, that's when everyone's at their best.

Yeah. And it's that thing of, like, you go, you kind of, you get better at the craftsmanship of it, like being good at something and, like, working at it. And I don't know, it's like, it's really fun to get up. I mean, I found that the roast last night, I had such a brilliant time because for me, I was trying to reverse engineer, I don't know anything about american football. So I was going, tom Brady's like nothing to me.

Yeah.

I mean, he's very handsome, but I'm not a gay guy, despite being european. But also, he, he's like, and he's a footballer, and he's one of the quarterbacks. Fabulous. Don't mean anything to me. So I'm trying to reverse engineer the jokes in my head and going, oh, that must mean that guy was, oh, ok, I could do it.

What was your favorite joke from the night? Last night?

Nicky Glazers. Nikki Glazers, to you, I really am a huge fan of your joke. Made me laugh for, I would say I'm still laughing at it now. So good.

Yeah.

It was so disrespectful.

But, I mean, there was, there was a few incredibly good.

There was so many good. Her set, I thought, was just a, that was a masterclass set in, in roasting.

Yeah.

Like, it was perfectly done. I wouldn't change the lines, the cadence, the pot, everything. It was just structurally, everything was perfect about it. It was fantastic. Tony, I had this thing where I was like, I, we've been around Tony for so long.

Yeah.

And Tony basically lives in roast mode. He's somebody who, like, a lot like you, where, like, the jokes just keep. So you sit with Tony in the green room or you go to lunch with Tony, and he is like, he's just always roasting people.

Right.

Like, when I was in Montreal, when I first met Tony.

Yeah.

He was like, it was roast battle, it was that year, and he was just, like, hanging out, like, pitching ideas constantly, just being around, like, we've been around him so much. I think it's often that thing, though, with your friends.

Yes.

Where you're around them and you see them and then suddenly they do something like that and you go, well, I knew he was capable of that.

Yeah.

But I think America just found out.

That's exactly right.

Even the kil Tony thing is like, I mean, it's selling out. Madison Square Garden. It's doing great.

It's amazing.

But I think, like, the name recognition and the respect, I think it just happened last night.

I think so, too. I mean, I'm so happy for him.

He's so down.

I was like, this is so cool that we've watched you for years be great at this. And then you just got. You had an opportunity and you just knocked it out of the park. Like, everybody saw the brass neck of.

Him to make jokes about being short. The brass neck. What is he, four foot two?

Yeah, he's not a big man.

His joke about me, it looks like the liver King met the Burger King.

Oh, yeah.

And has the liver of Rodney King got beat up by Martin Luther, whatever the fuck. I came to do his joke. I was like, God damn it.

Yeah, that was amazing.

My only thing I. My only take back, and if you watch the special, it's super enjoyable, is I read everyone's jokes as they were doing them because I was reading the prompter. So the whole.

You're saying this because you think we don't know that? Oh, no, no, we saw it.

Oh, seriously?

Yeah. Oh, no. I was going to inquire as to your reading age when I got here. I think you'll be coming along.

I just saw the clip of Burt with Tony doing it burst going, yeah.

He looks like he's praying. He looks like he's quietly praying. Hope it goes okay. Hope it goes okay. Because I would say, like, I was watching, and, like, there's a bit of you that watches and, you know, from the audience as a comment going, that's good. That's good. That's a great line. Okay. You know, you're kind of. You're kind of analyzing and thinking, I wish I was up there and I was thinking, oh, my God, it must be so hard when you're sat there and someone's just eviscerated.

Yeah.

And then. And then you kind of. You, God, we've got another half an hour to wait.

We said that, bro. We said that when Nikki was up, it goes, Kevin, Jeff, Drew Bledsoe, who fucking murdered Nikki, destroys. And Tom and I looked at each other, and Tom goes, we're gonna bomb. And because our thing wasn't that what.

Everyone else was doing, and people don't know that. They didn't know that. We weren't asked to, like, roast. Traditionally, we're asked to do this different. And I was like, I don't know if this is gonna be well received. Like, the monitor, it was great because it's like, it's.

As you're watching it as a punter, like, in the audience, you go, yeah, it's like a different speed.

Yeah.

And it's a very long show. So actually, doing something that's a different. And, you know, like, so you're watching the roasting for, like, you know, an hour, and you go, well, everything's been hit on. We understand his wife has gone, and he lost some money in bitcoin. And then you go, it's nice to have a little. Okay. There's another thing, like a little palate cleanser, a great line. It's really helped me understand my wife.

Oh, yeah.

I got a really big laugh.

Not from your wife.

I would imagine that got a big fucking laugh.

You know who got. No, you probably didn't see it. You know who did the best job of the night? And no one knows? Alonzo Bowdoin.

Really?

Alonzo did the warm up. And both. I was sitting with Shane Gillis, and we both kind of went, this is an impossible kick. There's 20,000 people in the arena. Everyone's up and chatting, and no one is. The room is so unfocused. And he came on and he did material, and he. I mean, he's such a pro.

He's a.

He just got them. He's a beast. And it's all new stuff. It's stuff I know before I know him very well. But, like, that was before they even started doing the thing. But, like, the setup was so right.

Yeah.

And I gotta say, like, you know, when you host the thing, too, you. You can kind of be personality versus material. I thought Kevin fucking killed, you know, I mean, like, he had great material. He had great energy. He always kept it fun and funny. He would kind of just a very.

Generous laugh as well. He was a legit goddamn movie star.

Yeah.

Like one machine movie that didn't count. Like a proper. Yeah, no, proper general release. Like, people went to see. They bought tickets.

Yes. Yes.

It's like a real movie.

Yeah. No, real revenue. Yes.

Not like, whatever the. You made a thing for YouTube. Not that. Yes, a real one.

Yes.

I was reading his prompter, and he.

Would go, yes, we know it was on television.

He would go off book. And I was getting nervous for the prompter guy, because you'd see the prompter guy scroll and then scroll back and scroll back and back and back. Kevin would come back and hit the thing that was on the screen. He was. Kevin murdered.

He was great. He was really great.

But when. When Nikki went up, we thought we were going to bomb. And then God bless Kim Kardashian.

Yeah. For fucking.

I didn't understand that for a sec. I thought, like, were they booing the concept of Hollywood?

They kind of were. It's what they were booing. Cause this is one thing we figured out. I don't know if it registered to you that that audience. They were football fans. They were Tom Brady and professional football fans. When comedians walked out initially, you know, at most comedy events, people know the comedians. Comedians got, like, nothing.

Mostly when they do a roast. Yeah. It's in a hotel ballroom, not an arena. I know, like, on a Sunday afternoon, they were there. This Brady guy's pretty famous.

Yeah, he's pretty famous. They were there for Tom and for patriots and for football players. And so that was, like, a thing that I picked up on. I was like, oh, they're. And also, like, the way they reacted to jokes. And I think she symbolized everything that fan base kind of hates. Right. And so I thought she did pretty.

Well, I've got to say. Here's, like, here's she's good news.

This is why. This is why. This was something that I kept noticing, too, because in seeing prompter and watching all the acts, one of the things that you pick up on was the people that didn't do well. And there were a few that, like, it was. I'm saying, like, the regular roasting was, was. It wasn't because of them or the material. It's that they kept going off script.

Yeah.

Cause we would be casual, and they.

Commit to the bit.

They would read, like, the top line, and you're like, okay. And then. And they don't realize, see, we know how important economy of words. And, like, the. You gotta say this before. This is the connective tissue to that. And they would go, first line, and then I would watch them, like, riff on that and then try to pick up, and you're like, yeah, it doesn't work like that. You have to stick to the whole thing for the thing at the end to pay off.

Yeah, I thought, I thought Kim Kardashian did a great job. I mean, the joke, I wouldn't have told anyone. I would have made a second.

The reason I think she was able to. Cause she ended up getting a big couple of big pops is because she stayed in the pocket.

So to get booed like that and to just sit with it.

Yes.

Okay. And then to do it, the confidence.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Like, to get booed by that many people, it's like, most people would crumble. Of course people would affleck, which is where, it's an industry term, it's where you get dry mouth and you can't. Your veneers stick to your lips and you can't speak?

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I thought his whole bit, by the way, I was convinced. I was ashamed going, I'll tell you what's going to happen. He's going to do this bit about a guy talking shit online, and the guy's going to be Matt Damon, and he's going to be in the audience, and then they're going to do a bit together because otherwise this would be insane. And then he walked off, and I went, oh, I was wrong about that.

But that's more to my point, is that he was completely jumping off of that script, man. Like, he would stay. He would get the gist of it, and then just, we were, like, reading it. We're like, why is he jumping off? And then it would go worse. And then he would just jump ahead to the next thing. So he, I don't know if it was nerves or, like, or the fact, like, we're so used to do it. Maybe also he passed on rehearsal and didn't want to come to that or something. But that's why I think he probably.

Didn'T want to come to rehearsal because he didn't want to be roasted, maybe. So it's that thing. Did they tell you Kim Kardashian was going to be there?

I knew it because I went to rehearsal and I saw her face on.

A picture you rehearsed, because watching it, you wouldn't think. That doesn't come across.

Can I tell you, I killed it in rehearsal. And then when we did our rehearsal that morning, I stumbled on a couple lines, and I was like, motherfucker, I've done this. I've hosted so many tv shows. I'm fine with prompter. But I was like, what the fuck? And I realized when we started the bit that there were so many laughs in between that you didn't have to run through it, that you could take your time and say the sentence. And I was like, oh. When we got our first laugh, I went, okay, I don't. I have to wait for the laughter to end to say my next line.

And it's a. It's a long laugh in that room as well, because it's a big room.

Yeah.

I don't know if you're used to big rooms, but it's a big room.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I did think, like, as event. It was such a great thing to be at.

Yeah.

Just kind of.

It was a fun thing. It was long as shit, Jimmy. Like, we. When we were like, wait, ok. And then when I found out we were at least front load, like, we were in the first part of the show, I was like, great. But then sitting there for another two.

Fucking hours also, you go, Ron Burgundy's just been on, man.

What?

Who's going on after that?

Yeah.

That's Bill Belichick.

Yeah.

They had.

And he kind of did follow that.

He murdered. He's so. You know why?

He's not the only patriot. The murdered.

This is why.

There's the joke again. I had to properly reverse engineer. Oh, yes. The man with the. Yes. He was a bit murdering.

He was.

Yeah. And that's frowned upon.

Yes, it is. It is.

I was wondering if you. What? Cause some people mug when they say jokes, some people, uh, don't. Some people are very dry. And Bill Belichick was so dry.

Yeah.

That I was like, that is a comedy style in and of itself. He was like.

He was his drawing.

He was like. He was like Bob Newhart style.

Yeah.

Like, he was like.

Someone told me a thing about Bob Newhart recently that kind of blew my mind. The button down comedy of Bob Newhart. He was working in an office. That was his second time, I think it was his first time doing comedy as the recording of the album.

What?

Yeah. He'd never done comedy. He wrote this thing. He went to a place and performed it. They taped it and they put it out. Is like. It blew my mind. Like, it's like, is that not insane? Yeah. I mean, people probably don't. It's a weird thing. I always think, like, everything goes back into the pop with comedy.

Yeah.

Like, people don't particularly revere or remember people from a bygone age, but Bob Newhart was just fantastic.

Fantastic.

Really?

But that first record apparently hadn't done it before.

That's.

That's really amazing. Yeah. That's amazing.

Well, I should post my first time doing stand up. Maybe I'll. Yeah, man, it was so bad. No, that's my first. My first joke that worked was about jerking off in a cheeseburger into one. No, with one. I put it around my dick and jerked off with a cheeseburger around my dick.

Okay.

And that was like a big closer.

That was your closer.

And it was just. I didn't know what stand up was, so I just was, like, telling the most revealing stories I could about myself.

Yeah.

And did they make you leave in and out?

No, but I took.

They shouldn't have called it in and out if they didn't want people to do that. Do you talk about animal style?

You're so good. None of these were in my bit.

Yeah. I said no mayo. I mean, how much of a problem do you have with food before you. Before you fuck a burger? I mean, I'm not a psychiatrist, but that feels like this is the conversation before the intervention. Right? Oh, I love food. No, no, you don't understand.

Maybe I won't post it. Wait, what was your first set like?

It was. It was all right. I mean, it was a weird thing where you go, I think, before.

Set the scene. Set the scene. Because I know you were a corporate guy.

Yeah. I was working kind of in an office. I kind of. I don't know, kind of fell into this job in marketing for a big oil company, and just. I was kind of. Really?

Yeah.

But you also. He was a runner of a company. That's. That was.

No, no, but I go. When I think of Jimmy Carr, I think a big oil rigs and saudi shakes and, like, BP and, like, fucking handshakes and ferraris and nice watches and then. Is that real?

Yeah.

I mean, ish. I mean, it was like.

It.

I do was think that thing in life, like, the good is the enemy of the best. I had a good job and it was fine, and it was like, what you were supposed to do next, enemy of the best. The good is the enemy. Yeah, but it's often that thing of, like, if life is good enough, sometimes you don't take the risk, sometimes you can't. You know, it's. When you've got nothing, that's kind of an advantage in life. If you're listening to this and you think, oh, my God, I've just got. I got nothing. You've got nothing to lose. Yeah. It's like, you can. You. Sometimes when it. Things are kind of okay, you stay in the okay thing.

Yeah.

And it was. It was certainly okay. It was an okay life. But it was that thing of. I was maybe mid twenties, so it kind of finished university and, like, got this corporate job, and it was all going great. And you could see. I could see it's such a clear path. And then I left to join the circus. It was like, you know, yo ho ho, a pirate's life for me. And this thing of, like, I started going to comedy more and more because I was a bit. I wasn't depressed. I was like, sad. You know, that thing of, like, depression is the serotonin imbalance in your brain is very serious medical condition. Sad is when it's circumstance and when it's just circumstantial, it's your fault and you can do something about it. It's good news to be sad. And then I just kind of started going to comedy. Liked it. And then you know that, like, almost like the reverse of your career. You start seeing people in, like, really big venues doing 2 hours and they're great. And then you start going to clubs and they're doing 20 minutes, and you go, oh, my God, I could never do that.

And then you go to tiny, like, little call in places above a bar, and you go, I'm not gonna do that.

Yeah.

And then your career is finding your way back to the big venue.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

The first time I was one liners. I just could write one liners. I could think like that.

It's a version of who you are. Right. Like, the first time was still, like, reminiscent of what we know as you.

Yeah, I think so. Yeah. I think it was like, like little wordplay, things like, yeah, I was. Lots of stuff about being kind of very middle class. Like, lots of stuff about, you know.

But you're middle class.

I've kind of. I perceived as being middle class.

What's that?

Like in Britain, we have. We have class. Like, you have race. We have like, a big kind of class system. And yes, it's slightly odd. I'm perceived as being quite posh.

Yeah, absolutely.

Upper class.

Yes.

But actually, my parents are irish immigrants to Ireland, so we only came over in the early seventies, so for work. So it's that thing of, like, I know what I am, but I also know how I'm perceived. We think you kind of, and that's really helpful in showing us to know.

Brits are so in tune with the class system there. Do most Brits perceive you as posh or know that you're middle class?

No, they would. They would perceive me as being posh. Posh, posh, yeah.

Okay.

Because I'm over educated or whatever. You know, if you went to that university, if you got that thing, because it used to be. I mean, it's not so much anymore because university has become like a luxury item.

Yes.

Might as well be a Louis Vuitton handbag now.

Yeah.

Or a porsche. But you got it. Used to be. It was a kind of a meritocracy and there was social mobility in that. You could sort of change your class by going to a certain school.

Right.

And hope for a better job and. Yeah, it was good.

Is there a part of you that still has a irish immigrant mentality?

I think there's something about, like, the Irish. There's something about the. There's a Morrissey song, irish blood, english heart. There's something about that where there's a lot of. There's a lot of us that have gone into the creative thing, and it's. I don't know if there's. There's something to being other because you see things in a slightly different way.

Yeah, I think that can be perceived. Like, I always felt other. Even though I probably fit in. I always felt other. I always felt. I've always felt other. I even. We went to that party the other day that I said to Ted, I go, I don't belong here.

Like, and I. I felt that, too, though. I asked security, should he be here?

We're fitting in.

Thing is, like, it's like Alan Havey gave me the best language. You know, Alan.

Yeah.

Old school is amazing comic, but, you know, comedy. What? We're out for ourselves, but in it together, that's good. So it's like the opposite of being an actor, right? If you're an actor and you're getting the part of James Bond, one guy can get that role. And what's our job? Well, we escape competition through authenticity. That you. Absolutely. You are yourself. No one else could be you or would want to be. But you know what I mean? It's like you do your thing, and even though you guys are very good friends, very different stylistically on stage. And it's different styles. It's different. Yeah. There's a crossover of, like, fans, but actually very different styles of comedy. Like, we are all doing our little thing of, like, who would I see last night, Mark Norman was at the store, and he's one liner guy. I'm a one liner guy. We can kind of. But it's so different. Whatever you bring to that is, like, your thing.

It's yours. Yeah.

It's kind of that thing of, like, just being yourself seems like that thing of, like, the world that we live in now. Like, the podcasting thing is huge because people are just being authentic. And where else do you get that? You watch the news and people are speaking in this weird language that no one speaks like that. What are you talking about?

Yeah, what? Can I ask you a weird side question?

I'd be amazed if you didn't.

How do you feel about Oliver Cromwell?

What? In terms of like, I have someone.

With irish parents who was horrific in Ireland, but yet they have a statue of him up in London and he's. And they like. And he's all about this. Like, I'm curious, I'm dying. I'm. I'm obsessed with Oliver Cromwell right now.

Really. You know the phrase warts and all is for Oliver Cromwell?

Yeah. He had him on his face.

Yeah. But it was, it was, it's from the painting.

Yeah.

So when you used to get your portrait painted, that was the, if you were an important person, you'd have your portrait done and they would always make you look a little bit more beautiful than you were because you paint them and whatever. So everyone was. And when he was painted, he famously said warts and all.

The. Cromwell is the guy who killed King Charles because he was, he was, they were all about. He's actually considered a dictator because he had the military rise up against the king, who I think King Charles, but he was dodging him. And then Oliver Cromwell got him a beheaded him, got rid of the monarchy and then. But was horrible in Ireland and he was very pivotal. They put up a statue of him. And I think, like the seventies or maybe the eighties in London, everyone felt one of two ways. Like fucking Winston Churchill. Hated Oliver Cromwell. Hated Oliver Cromwell. And there was an old prime minister that paid for the statue. He commissioned the statue. He loved Oliver Cromwell. But I was curious, as an irish person of irish descent, how you felt about Oliver Cromwell, because it's. Oliver Cromwell is a curse word in Ireland, correct?

Speaker one not really. I mean, I don't think. I think it's like most people are kind of through that now in terms of like, you know, I mean, they call it the troubles, but there was a civil war. I mean, it was like, it was, it was awful. And they managed to find a peace somehow. So it's kind of, it's. I think most people are, there's a generation now that are kind of have never really seen that really. It used to be so. It was like, I mean, you know, things were blowing up in London. When I was a kid. I remember my mother, my mother had a very strong irish accent. And I remember, like, we went into a store at, like the local store to buy newspapers and candy, whatever, and the guy behind the counter said, these Irish, there being some bombing, and the guy said, oh, these Irish, they should be killed along with their children. And my mother and I'd never seen it before, just fucking eviscerated the guy, really, just like in front of a bunch of people just crazy at the guy.

Wow. That's. It's something that we don't really understand. Is that whole, like. I don't. I think if you ask most Americans what great Britain is, they don't know what that is. I don't think they know what London is. The UK or England. Yeah. Like, it's like, all of that is so. It's amazing that it's, like, the same way you feel about football. We feel about the rest of the world.

Yeah, but, I mean, America is so huge. You've got so much going on here. You know, people often do that thing of America's. Don't have passports. You go, yeah, but if you had Alaska and Texas and Florida and Hawaii. Hawaii. And there's a lot of places to go before you need to leave. There's a lot of boxes to tick before you got to get to Europe. It's a weird thing with the statues thing. I would feel fine about it. I think statues are good. I think history is a good thing. I think if it reminds people, then great. And you just need to, you know, everything's in context.

Yeah. When you started doing comedy clubs, because we both started in comedy clubs, and you would. I was not good at recognizing morons. Like, I would tether up to morons quick. Tom is really good at picking out morons. Like, he's like, fuck that guy. He's an idiot.

He knows he's saying this. Yeah.

Why? What am I saying? But, like, but, but, like, were you. Because you were, like, you came from a different world. Would you.

You're saying Tom good at picking out morons.

He's really good at picking out more. Oh, no, I'm not saying that.

And there you saw the penny drop in perhaps the slowest of all motions. Yeah. The. The fact that you didn't get a joke about being a moron.

Can you have to make me another drink? So, wait, did you. Did you.

So we take two drinks away. Is that.

What's the phrase? Suffer fools lightly.

Suffer fools gladly? Is that what it is? Yeah, but go on. What's the.

Did you.

What do you mean? Like, other comics that were.

Yeah. When you go back, I was convinced.

Everyone was a genius.

Really?

Because you'd see guys that were doing 20 minutes that they. I didn't know they'd be doing the same 20 minutes for ten years.

Sure.

And they were working on a sitcom or they were writing a movie, and I was going, Jeff, I need to work a bit hard. I need to do a bit more. These guys are on it, and then you don't realize they weren't doing anything. They were talking a good game. Yeah, there's a lot of people that talk a good game, and then you go, yeah, but you don't kind of. You're doing the same thing. Or guys that had one trick, like, they could write one type of joke, but they couldn't write the other type of joke.

Right.

They could write a pullback reveal, but they couldn't. They couldn't do anything else.

Yeah, I would. I would think that you would walk into a green room very comfortably. I walked into the comedy store in London. I've been doing stand up for, like, probably 14 years, 15 years. And those guys got in my head so hard about, like, because there's, there, I guess the comedy store in London's, like, the place.

Yeah. I mean, not to the same. I don't think it's. It's not as good as, let's be honest, the comedy store in Los Angeles and the comedy seller in New York, it's. That's quite a unique thing of, like, people turn up to work on stuff that are huge comics, and it's every single night of the week. It's their phenomenal places.

Yeah.

And I guess mothership is becoming that.

Yeah. Have you been. You've done spot on there, haven't you?

Yeah.

Your podcast with Rogan was amazing, by the way.

Oh, it was really good fun.

Really. I get stuck on things where, like. And they get stuck in my head where I think about it a lot, and it, you know.

Yeah.

You said something about that I can't stop thinking about. A lot of people play the guitar. A lot of people love music. And then they also play music for fun. They have fun. They really enjoy it. They're not going to be a musician. They're not going to be doing. But no one does that with comedy. And you were saying there should be an accessibility to comedy. People love comedy. They should do comedy. They should learn comedy the same way you would learn the guitar. Why wouldn't you want to learn comedy? I thought it was really a fucking profound statement.

Well, I'm working on a thing at the moment. My friend Amanda Baker and Abby Grant, we're working on a, like, a book and maybe a course about teaching it, because I do think it's like, there's a lot of mystery around comedy, like, in green rooms and things. It's like, that guy's just a genius. And you go, well, no, he's not a genius. He's doing something. There and if you break it down, and sometimes I think there's slightly the, there's an illusion that people go, well, it just comes to me on stage, you go, no, you're writing, but that's where you're writing.

That's where you're writing. Yeah. I've always resented when people talk about, they're like, this, this guy's on another level. I'm like, no, there's a level of proficiency that you get to, and then it's kind of like, it becomes what your taste is when they start talking about, like, I just feel like after a certain amount of time, there's a number of people that get to a very proficient level. And to me, I see everybody at that level as essentially the same. I just, I kind of, you have your taste where, but it, I don't feel like that person is a genius at some point.

I think the genius thing's a bit overused as well. It is unlike that thing of, like, you go, there's, there's pure genius. There's, you know, I don't know, Bach or von Neumann or something, and then there's hyper accelerated rationality, which I think is what comics have. A lot of the time when we're in stage, on stage, I think the bit that works, sometimes you think of a joke, but then when you're on stage in front of people, your mind goes at a weird speed, and your subconscious just throws something out that you're the little tag on the end of it that you go, where did that come from? Or you're chatting to an audience member. It's like it comes that quick. But again, I think it's like being in that state. I do think that thing of, like, teaching it, because, kids, what do you get from stand up comedy? You get to speak in your own voice. The tragedy that so many people live and die without ever hearing their own authentic voice.

The kids, this is really big in the United States. I don't know if you have, you must have a version of it. But, like, the kids that would do Borat impressions, and then that would become their personality. It's like, it was like an ace Ventura impression in high school, and then that was their personality. All righty, then. Like that, then. And they never learned comedy. They learned how to be funny by watching a movie and emulating that, as opposed to finding your authentic voice is so fucking cool.

But it's almost like a first step, right? I mean, those kids that were doing that, like, when you look back, you go, oh, they're kind of, like, toying with how to do comedy, and they're.

Drawn to the joy of it.

Yes.

Because it's. The joy of comedy is like, I think the reason we all do it, it is kind of, people come and they need it.

Yes.

I think that's something that we don't really talk about much because we sound very up ourselves. But the idea of going, some people go into comedy, and they've got a tough life, and they got a tough job and a tough family situation, and they need to come out, and they need a couple of hours off from that. To just laugh at this guy, and this guy is like, the freedom to speak and to say what you want on stage is kind of, oh, I.

Felt, I felt it with you the first time I saw you do stand up. And I remember Tom had said, you gotta see him. He's so fucking good. And it was at Montreal. And the joy of seeing something you've never seen before, seeing someone do it proficiently, and it being comedy and being really surprised, I love that so much. When you're like, you're like, oh, shut. Like. And it's. And even being a comic, you're like, this is fucking next level. I mean, you had your clipboard on stage in the roast battles. You were destroying people. And I was like, God, I know how the trick's done, but I don't know how he's doing it.

But isn't it a weird thing with the. There's a perfect mix of stand up where you go, especially with storytelling, I think even more so than what I do. Like, the dopamine here. If you don't quite know where the laugh is coming, I mean, you know there's going to be a laugh.

Yeah.

But you don't quite know where it's coming.

And that's.

And then you get the serotonin. You know, the joy of the serotonin is great. So it's like that thing of, it's a, it's real joy. Real joy, as opposed to, you know, there's so many things in our lives that are, like, you know, drinking drugs is kind of a proxy for joy. Yes, but you go, no, he said.

Reaching the thing that I live for in comedy, in a feature film, in any type of storytelling that I consume, I'm. I just want to be surprised. That's it. Like, it's a, it's actually sounds small. It's a big ask, because your, your experiences, your mind, other things you've consumed fill your mind with, like, expectations. So to get a surprise whether it's in a joke or a twist.

But isn't that. I mean, every joke, when you break it down.

Yes.

Every joke is the. It's the. The sudden revelation of a previously concealed fact.

Yes.

It's like you tell two stories, and in the first story, you think it's going to go this way and it goes another way, and the rug is pulled. And, you know, the most simplistic. Someone falls over.

Yes.

Or someone should be wearing a shirt, and they're not.

Yes. By the way, this is how good Nikki Glaser did last night. Ready?

Yeah.

Georgia's been calling me all day. Georgia's friends watched the roast and all they said to Georgia, you know, Nikki Glaser, really? And they're like, that's how good. And Georgia called me this morning. I was picking up I love from school. She called it sick. Georgia goes, hey, I hadn't watched a roast. Nikki Glazer murdered, huh? And I was like, it's funny. My daughter speaks in comedy terms. That's how close she is to comedy. I said, she fucking destroys. She goes, tell me some of her jokes. And so I was telling her, and she was like, yeah, all my friends. All my friends were like, Nikki Glazer this, Nikki Glazer that. And then they saw a picture of me and Nikki Glazer. And they're like, you know her. And I was. She was like, I had to keep on the DL, dad. Like, it's. But Georgia, all her girlfriends are obsessed with Nikki Glaser right now. Fuck.

Killed.

And that crazy.

I love that thing, though. Like, when it pops for someone, I always think that thing about, like, you can tell when you've got, like, friend frenemies or real friends.

Yeah.

Like, because there's some people in comedy that you, like sometimes maybe a bit too close to, and there might be a bit of jealousy. And that thing of, like, the, you know, comparison is the thief of joy. But when it happens for someone and you go, yes.

Yeah, it's awesome.

I mean, the last one, probably before this. I mean, hopefully Tony and she, Nikki, get to that kind of next level, because Shane Gillis was the last one where the whole industry went.

Yes. Yes.

It's the weird thing, like, the upside of the down. I was chatting to Neil Brennan about this, of going. When you get canceled or when you get dragged online, there's an upside. And the upside is the people that are your people. It's a chance to root for you.

Yes.

It's a chance to go, no, that's my guy.

That's a good.

When it happens for Shane, it's like, he's like everyone's.

Like everyone's.

Shane. Shane had a different. Shane had a different. Because he was no one's guy yet. He was no one's guy. So young. He was no one's guy. And. And Shane had to get the people to, like, fur. Like, he got canceled before he had the people.

Yeah.

And so then he had to get the people. And as they got the people, then they started in. I mean, it was a really crazy way to be canceled. And before you were even famous, like, you dealt with shit.

You got it out of the way early, didn't he?

Yeah. You know, you dealt with shit, which, I gotta be honest with you, it was like. It's like. Well, you know when people say racial slurs from other countries and you're like. Like you edited out. I know you can't say this word, but I don't get. It doesn't bother me.

Oh, I could. I could say, okay, okay.

Yeah, I don't care. It doesn't bother me. But, you know, I know you can't say it in, like, certain places, but that's the thing. When you got canceled, that was like hearing a racial tour from a different country. Because I was like, it's a great fucking joke. And then people got upset, and I was like, what the fuck? Wait, hold on. Then, you know, he's a comedian. Like, that was the most bizarre one. I go, you people that are doing this are just about to make him a million times bigger. Because it's a great fucking joke.

It did. It did. It did bump up the figures.

Fuck.

It was like the Netflix special had done well, and then there was a big controversy, and it kind of went back into the top ten again. There was that thing of like, you go, yeah, there's going to be. And, you know, you get dragged for these things every now and then, but you have to. You only have to answer one question when you get canceled, which is, who are you? You know, did you say an error? What? You did you. Were you drunk? Were you high? Did you make a mistake? Or did you know? I. No, I said that 400 times on the tour.

Yeah.

And I put it on the Netflix special. Yeah, I think it's a really good joke.

Yeah.

Yeah.

But the idea that a joke isn't a joke, it's a statement of fact, is the trick that they. That's the switcheroo that the papers do or the people that are outraged.

Yeah, but, you know, your response. I was trying to tell Tom, and I didn't articulate it well, shockingly. But your response of, so you understand that I can say something that I didn't mean. It's gone viral recently. I'm sure you know what I'm talking about.

Oh, yeah. The bit where, yeah, it's like the next time I get canceled, what I'm gonna do, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna make a public statement on the day I get canceled, and I'm gonna say I'm sorry. And the people that are offended by the joke will say, you don't really mean that apology. And I'll say, so you're saying I could say something and not mean it. Now you're getting it.

It's great.

It kind of sums it up, though, right? It's like that thing, you go, you, you're pretending you don't know what a joke is, but you do. Gervais said it very nicely. Gervais said, I think it's on his last special, he said, you're laughing at the wrong thing because you know what the right thing is. And a lot of what I do when it's like, you're talking about those issues that are really fun to talk about, though, aren't they?

And it's a release. That's what the, that's what you go to the show for. It's like, it's the fun of finding a place where for this time, in this space, you get to do that. You get to go say things that you can't say out on the street without somebody going, like, why would you say that? Because you're not saying it on the street. You're saying it into a microphone. There's context to this whole thing.

Yeah. I don't think people, I think sometimes when it only causes trouble, when it escapes the lab. I was thinking the thing people don't consider is being in a comedy audience last night, I really felt it last night. It's a performance, being in the audience.

Yeah.

You're. The audience are performing as well.

You're not. Yeah. You're together.

If someone said to you, if you went to see, I don't know, AC DC live in concert. Right.

Yeah.

And someone says, how we do in Los Angeles? Everyone goes, yeah. No one says that in Starbucks. How you doing? Ah, you're insane.

Yeah.

You're a lunatic.

Yeah.

There's a performance to it.

There is. Yeah.

I'm gonna start doing that.

How you doing?

Oh, God. Where are the black women at the Starbucks? That would be great. Keep it up, keep it going for our fucking soldiers.

But it's that thing of like, the performance of like, being there and laughing. You're signaling to other people that you get it. It's like, I think people desperately want to feel part of something they do. And when you come, your sense of humor is so personal to you, right? It's like when you've got your guy and we've all got our guys that we just love.

Yes.

And it might not be our closest friends, but the idea of like, guys that we go and see or we watch and we just go, I'm just going to belly laugh my weird, weird laugh at this. I'm going to honk at it for an hour because I love everything about the cadence of this. I love it, and it's a relief. It's just fabulous.

From where I was, performance last night, which, like, sitting up there, I know you were very close, but did you feel like. Cause to me, I was like, man, just being up here watching this, it felt like such a fun vibe for a roast. Like, I thought, with few exceptions, everything.

Even the exceptions, are important.

Yeah.

I think you have to have a little break for if everyone kills. What it was is one note. So some of the footballers didn't do as well as the others. I thought that Julian guy, I don't know who he is. I thought he was fabulous.

He was a great guy.

And Gronk was fucking amazing. The gronk thing, it strikes me that there's a, there's an opportunity for someone is having a discussion today about, because it's the same thing. Remember when Snoop did a roast with Martha Stewart and then they went off and made tv shows together? It strikes me that there's a gronk show where he go, we take him and we send him to the Vatican to look at the art.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's what I want to see.

Yeah, I want.

I want him to go and. Yeah. Where we sending him?

What?

We're sending him to the Middle east. We're going to see if he can sort things out. It was Gronk. No, like, it was great.

Who was, who was Gervais buddy? That.

Yeah, the Carl Piperton.

Yes.

Carl used to be my producer on my radio show. He was, yeah, he was the producer at XFM before with a radio show.

But like, there's like a feeling almost like, put this guy in the situation, just watch him.

Yeah, he should be. Yeah. Like one of these.

Yeah. Gronk and I could be brothers.

Yeah, yeah.

Gronk and I get along.

Well, he's famously good at spotting morons.

So Gronk and I have lot of similar thoughts.

Yeah, no, I was watching you guys. I got to. I got to. I got into a room, and I got to sit in the middle, and then I had Gronk here and Bert here, and I got to tell you, man, it was.

It was like watching, and they were both fucking burgers.

I met Gronk at a dinner one night, and we went to dinner together with a bunch of people. And did.

Did the others get anything to eat?

No, we fucked food up. We fucked booze up, and it was the fucking wildest night. And it ended with Gronk going, yo, Paulie Shores upstairs can introduce me. I was like, gronk, you can introduce yourself. Everyone knows who you are. He is. He is everything you. This is a beautiful thing, and I wonder what your thoughts are when you meet a celebrity. You want them to be everything you think they're gonna be. And Gronk delivers 100% gronk across the board. He is everything you want him to be. Sometimes you meet a celebrity and you'll be like, fuck, guys. Kind of a dick or whatever, but, like, he is. Rogan's that way. When you meet Rogan, he's just as bizarre and curious as you think he's going to be.

Yeah, I think it's probably with maybe actors that you get that. Yeah, because you. You. Oh, wow, he's so cool. Because he played a cool guy in a movie. Yeah, but he's not that guy.

He's not that guy.

But he said all those cool things. Yeah, but he didn't write those cool things. He said the line. Yeah, so it's often like that thing where you go, the musician who's a rock star, and you think he's super rock and roll. Yeah, but he's an artist. He's sitting there writing the songs and getting the melody, and so it's a different thing. You're only seeing the performance bit. You're not seeing the artistry bit.

Who's your generation of comics? Like, when the guys you came up with, like, we know our generation. I'm curious in your scene who your generation of who, like, your class is.

Well, the guys I came up with, it depends where you draw it. Like, there's people that would be known on. I did my first ever Edinburgh show with Ricky Gervais and Steve Merchant. We all went up together and did 20 minutes each.

What year?

That would have been 2001.

When did you start?

I started about 2000, maybe before I.

Was in Edinburgh in 2000 with Patrice O'Neill and Rich Voss.

I got. Oh, well, I mean, that is.

We bombed.

Huh?

We bombed every night.

Did you?

Horrifically, so poorly. 29 nights in a row. 25 nights in a row.

Wow.

And it was silent. I remember Patrice threw a check chicks passport out of the room. He's like, get out of our fucking country. It was so uncomfortable. And I remember Patrice getting into it with Eddie Izzard or whatever. You know, something else susie is.

Eddie is still acceptable.

Yeah, yeah. Okay, Eddie. I didn't mean that disrespectfully by. But just getting into him, with him.

I remember being with Patrice. I only met him a couple of times, but being in, I think it was like Toronto. We're doing some nasty show thing in Toronto. And I never met him. Didn't know anything of his reputation. He so delivered, was so rude to the people backstage. As funny as he was on stage, like, he was absolutely, like, not just roasting, but, like, mean roasting.

Yeah.

So good.

Oh, he was.

I mean, what a. What a, what a guy.

Yeah.

It's so lovely that we've got, like, that. That thing of, like, if you love him, if you like that comedy. And the, got the. It felt like he knew when he taped elephant in the room.

Yeah.

He even makes the joke about, I'm like, I'm 70, effectively. Look at him. So great.

He was great.

He was amazing. He was committed to spending a lot of time over in the UK. When we did 2000, he was like, I might spend more time here. I might keep doing this. And Amsterdam and all those. The clears I could circle.

Amsterdam had a thing for a while. I did it a couple of times where they were really into, I think it was Def comedy jam was their thing. So they would book mainly kind of black american acts to come over, but they would book a couple of british guys as well. So I'd kind of get booked on the show. But that was really their thing, was they were into Def comedy jam, so it would have been, you know, I guess rich Voss did that back in the day. Yeah, that was kind of. It was cool.

It's a cool thing.

I mean, there's a big market over there. It's just difficult to know. You've only got a certain amount of time. And, I mean, I play everywhere around the world, but I think a lot of people just go, America's so huge. By the time you finish touring it, you've written a new show and you're ready to tour it again.

That's kind of true. You have to make an effort to leave financially.

Like, this is. I mean, you guys playing stadiums, order. I just think that thing. It does make it feel new again.

Yes.

When you go and do the Tokyo dome, it let you go. Well, this is. Hang on. Half the people are just local guys that have found me on YouTube and are into this. And it's just. It's fun for you.

Very. Internationally.

Yeah, I mean, I'm like 24 countries deep this year, I think.

Really?

Yeah, I did a lot of foreign.

Murder in South Africa.

Everyone murders in South Africa.

They do. South Africa is like, fucking wild.

Yeah, it's pretty wild.

You can do crazy shit on stage and they're like, ah, it's good fun.

Yeah, I did Joe Berg and Cape Town this time. Fantastic.

How long are you. Are you touring the stage right now or are you just here for the.

Just here for the festival? At the moment I'm gonna do a show, but. Because the Netflix thing dropped, like, three weeks ago.

Special, by the way.

Thank you very much.

Great special. Great fucking special.

But the. You've got to do new stuff immediately. So the next tour day, like, I went, okay, I'm doing the new stuff.

Are you. How long you stick in the city for?

I'm like, here till Wednesday. Got a show Wednesday night in LA, and then I'm going to go and do the Tonight show on Friday to New York. Yeah. Because I think it's the nineties and it might make a difference. I think if I can do four and a half minutes of funny stuff. Clean. Yeah, I think I might get a sitcom deal.

Kay, I'm pulling for you, man.

I'm really hoping that works.

Yeah, we're gonna have to explain to some of the listeners what sitcoms are. And it's like a. It's like a long tick tock, I guess.

Yeah, it's a very long.

Yeah, a long tick tock with TikTok, with some. With some ad reads in the middle.

Wait, what is your white whale? Like, what? Like what? What? Like, I. Cause I'm kind of lost in that right now. Is like, what are the. What do I want to do? I don't. I think I've done everything I ever thought I did way more than I ever thought I was gonna do. Like, what do you like? Someone comes, sits you in a room in Hollywood tomorrow, and they go, hey, Scott, Netflix. Ted says, I'm sure he's actually said this. Hey, anything you want to do? What do you want to do? Movie, sitcom, more specials? Man on the street? Eight cat. Eight out of ten cats.

Are you in this? Are you in this now? Are you thinking about this? Because I'm quite stoic at the moment. I'm like, do less, better. Everyone just write jokes.

My thing is do more mediocre.

Yeah. How's that working out?

I'm taking nine off in July. Yes. It's out.

You're taking nine months off in July? It doesn't understand how calendars work. You can't do that.

It's just a month.

A month is the longest you can take off in July.

Yeah, the.

So what you're gonna.

I don't know what I want to do.

Well, I suppose it's that thing of like, you go, there's a, what's the fancy term for it is the hedonic treadmill. You get used to your life being amazing, but that thing of like nine months, go and have some adventures. Go and, I don't know, try some things. Yeah, get on a train, try and upset some mafia people. You know the drill. But that thing of like going and having adventures and going and living your life and because I think it's great that you're doing it because there's no there there. You never arrive. Right. And what's this about? Hopefully we all get better. Hopefully in five years time. We look back at the specials we made this year and go, okay, well it's good, but, you know, I can see it, but this one's better. This one's got better jokes in it.

There'S better structure, there's all you're ever trying to do.

Yeah.

You're trying to get better at it. And, and there's always like, you're looking up to these masters, you know, I don't know who it is for you, but like, you look up to some.

Of these, you're one of them. You're one of them. I look at the way you, I think this is gonna be the most fucked up thing I've ever said. Yeah, I watch your specials and I go, God damn it, if I had his brain, I'd be such a good comic. He's. Cuz you're like, all my lazy parts are none of yours. Like, all my lazy parts are the things you excel at.

And I go, but it's so sweet of you to say that. And I genuinely, it's hard to take a compliment, but that's so lovely of you. But again, escape competition through authenticity. No one can do what you can do. It's so the opposite of like, no one in Hollywood was going, ah, this. I'll tell you what we need an out of shape, shirtless guy. But somehow the world wanted it. And the energy you have on stage that the performance, like, you fill a fucking room and it. And you carry people along. That storyteller thing. The grass is always greener, right? You're always kind of looking over at what other people can do, and it's like. But you forget your gift. You've got. The world ordered this, and they did.

They opened the bag and they're like, this isn't my order.

The secret is you got to honor it. You gotta honor that thing that you bring to the.

You know, it's great, but what's your white whale then?

What? The thing you want to do, like, you.

For you, like, what's your thing? Like, is there anything you want?

Mostly Oscars or, you know, I mean, like, is there anything that you ever go, that I would love?

Yeah, I think there's quite a lot of that stuff that you kind of. You could. You could reel off. But actually, I think just doing another. I think it's about special. I think it's about touring.

Yes.

It's doing good shows.

Yes.

Delivering. You know, it's. You know, I. I don't sound like a hippie, but it's an act of service, isn't it? It's that thing of like, well, I'd like to be good at this, and I'd like to deliver on it and deliver on that potential. All the other stuff is like, slightly like hosting the Oscars. God, be incredible.

Oh, you'd be so.

A chance to get slapped in the face.

Yeah.

But you go, well, that's not really. Yeah, it's not about the host. That's about giving.

Yeah, that's true.

Was there a part of you last night? Cause I know my energy, and I'm honest with my energy. If I had been sitting in the audience, I know Shane said, he's like, I should have fucking done it. It was part of you that was like, God, give me one. Fucking. Give me four minutes up there. I fucking own this room. Was there a part of you that was like, I would.

I really wanted to do it. I really wanted to do it. But it's that thing where you go, oh, you're in the audience. I was saying afterwards, like, take up. I went to the store afterwards and had to do a show because there's a part of you that goes, needs to perform. This is a fabulous show. People are destroying. A lot of my friends are killing up there. Why is this not more about me?

Yeah.

But there's a bit of you. There's a bit of you that's a performing. And you have to be respectful of that. Okay, well, you know, the ego kind of. Well, I could do that.

But look, man, you are among the best of the whites that we know. It's. I can.

It is such an honor to sit with white.

You are like.

It's really cool.

It's great overseas. As far as overseas whites, you're.

And you're like a confederate statue to us, because, like, you're an old school white. Like, you're like the authentic first one.

Yes.

You know, we all like the accent.

Did someone push the cancel button on me quick? We're gonna need some clicks on this. Say terrible things.

What's the name of the new special?

Natural born killer, if Quentin Tarantino is watching? I don't know what you're talking about. Not killers.

Yeah, killer you are. No, you're fucking absolutely an amazing comic to watch for. Anybody listening or watching, if you get a chance to see Jimmy live, that's where it's at.

Are you torn in the states at all?

I'll do it next year. I tell you what. Has anyone listened to this in Canada?

Yeah, of course.

You know, I'm doing a thing with Jim Jeffries. No, me and. Me and Jeff are doing an arena tour of Canada in September, October, and we're doing a double header. So it's me and Jim, so it's. If you like funny jokes, you're in luck. If you like funny stories, you're in luck.

That's everything.

I think it's gonna be fun. I think I love Jim. We've known him. I've known him a million years. I think it'd be fun.

He's a monster, man. He's a fucking monster.

Get tickets, go see Jimmy Carter, Jim Jeffries together and watch the new special. Dude. Seriously. It's always fun to see, bro.

You are. You are. And I have to say this is that we met. You googled your net worth in Canada. Tom's like, google is net worth. He's still doing stand up. And then I ran into you on the lot at, I think, somewhere in the valley. Universal.

Oh, yeah.

And you were so kind, and you're like, but, but. And I was like. And I was so impressed. Going to a general meeting. And I was like. I was like, he's a fucking monster. And he knows why.

He was like, but. Will you fill up this? My car with petrol.

My keys. Make sure it's clean. Thank you.

That was our.

We're not all chimney sweeps. Not all of us.

Can you do american accent?

Yeah. No, I'm doing it right now. This is how it should have been. Things went badly in Boston, but we're coming back. This isn't even an accent. This is just how things sound when they're pronounced properly.

Vitamin. How do you say vitamin?

How do I say vitamin? Yeah, vitamin.

You don't say vitamin?

Vitamins. Yeah. I would say vitamins.

How do you say tutu?

It's tutu.

I thought you were saying it right.

You do, yeah. And then it's, uh. What's the one? Aluminum.

Aluminum.

Aluminum, yeah.

And are we saying that wrong?

Well, the one. The one. The one that would be. It would be. I. I would say trousers. You would say pants.

That's true.

I would say pavement. You would say sidewalk. I would say, I'm an arm. Don't shoot. You would say, oops.

And then if we were like, it's a bit of a conundrum. You'd be like, it's a bit of a waifu, ain't it? Something like that, yes.

If we've had a head injury, traumatic head injury.

Sure.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. He would say that.

It's up there, but.

Yeah. You and Gronk. Me and Gronk, welcome to civilization.

We can't send the two of you out, though. There's gotta be somebody different.

There's gotta be.

If we just had you.

You're both wearing helmets.

It's gotta be like Jimmy and gronk.

What they should do is they should do a show called Jimmy Honk. Jimmy hosts gronk and Burt living together, and Jimmy's at a desk hosting. And just as we live, oh, they've gone to the beer again, the drinking again.

You guys, you guys in a house. Cameras everywhere.

Yeah.

And David Attenborough, the wildlife guy, just comments on these. On these guys. It's like we find the real Sasquatch.

Yeah.

Yeah. I'm gonna pitch at the gronk.

Neanderthals walking for the house. Yeah, that would be great.

They're showering in the pool. You shower in the pool?

Shower in the pool.

They get in the pool. Shower. Shower in the pool.

He showers in his shower in my pool.

He just.

I mean, I know you've. I know you're doing great in life, but I imagine you still have an above ground pool.

We had for a long time. We did.

Everything about you says, above ground pool.

Look behind you. Look at the poster behind you.

Yeah, that's me in an above ground pool.

Yeah.

And that's. That's celebrating. That's. He made it.

That's. I just showered. Yeah.

I was supposed to do that show with Jim Jefferies, and he backed out. He was having a kid, and I ended up doing red rocks by myself. Changed my career. I love Jim Jeffries.

He's awesome.

You're the best, brother.

Thank you, Jim.

You're the best.

Thank you so much.

Thank you, brother. And he's fucking best.

You're the best, dude.

Tom tells stories, and Bert's the machine. There's not a chance in hell that they'll keep it clean. Here's what we call two bears, one cave.