Ray is my last name. So, first of all, Rachel is what they were thinking, because. Rachael Ray. Yeah. And I'll take it from here. But I think that there's something about nice, special. You grab it, you twist it, you bop it.

You've seen the commercial stuff.

You want to tone it down a notch. Girls love to know.

Just.

I wonder how many different ways I could be stabbed right now. My bad. After he threw up into his mouth, he's like, why is your nose bleeding? I was like, during a visit to a strip club in Amsterdam. Yeah, I don't know if I should keep reading. In here, we pour. Whisk, whisk, whisk, whisk, whisk. You were that creature in the ginger beer. Sturdy, ginger like bear. The ginger gene is a curse. Gingers are beautiful. You only $5 for the whiskey, $75 for the horse. Gingers.

Oh, hell, no.

This whiskey is excellent ginger.

I like gingers. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to whiskey Junior. My guest today is one of my favorite people. My guest. My name once again today, it is the return of Adam Ray. He's here in the studio.

Good to be back. Kyrie Irving's shoes took him off for a bit. When Kyrie said, jews will not replace.

Us, what did he say? What did he really say?

He retweeted a nazi document, which, hey, man, who hasn't? But he did it early morning when everyone was online. So everybody saw it, and he got a couple of retweets. Big people noticed it, I think. You know, so many things are lost in translation when I think. I don't even know what the documentary was, but it was basically, people jumped on it and were like, Kyrie hates jews. And then he said something about, I think they doubled down and was like, something. Something. Black people. It just. It got weird. So then I was like, and I'll put on the Sean Kemps again. And then he took out a gun in a mall parking lot in Tacoma, and I was like, and we're going to the Vladi DevOps flip flops, because.

Switching it up, dude.

Bro, it's.

These athletes are making it hard for you to just wear shoes, dude.

I know.

Barefoot, dude. Go barefoot.

I could. There was a kid in my high school. His name. Actually. I'm gonna let you guess what his name was.

Like, a theobit. There was this one dude, man, he used to go barefoot. He'd walk on glass in front of us. Dude.

Yo, man. We called him crinkly toe gin.

Crinkly toes.

Crinkly toes. But that's just cuz he had crinkly. He had arthritis at age ten.

Yeah man.

But actually that's because his dad was a. His dad was a goat. But anyway, man, that's what it is.

Who's a kid in high school? You're gonna say somebody walk around I his name.

But he was barefoot and he was tall and he was my first taste of a hippie kid. I'm in high school. This kid's six five long goal.

Chode Donaldson. Chode Donaldson.

Not far. Give me, give me. How do we do this?

Nifkin Millersville.

Starts with an. No. I want you to think cool. Oh.

O'Reilly. O'Reilly auto parts.

That was him, man. No shoes.

Oh yeah. No, he name was.

He wore, he wore a flannel with no shirt, necklaces, no shoes. Long like hippie pants and he had long hair and he fucked everybody.

Yeah, he's.

Including the teachers.

He's the man, this guy Orion. Oh, Ryan. What a cool dude.

And he was.

So where is he now? Where are they now?

Can I tell you something? I was just talking about this the other day. I want to do a where are they now? High school.

High school. Yeah.

The amount of people. And last time I was on my favorite pod whiskey ginge. I was mentioning stories from the past. And you always bust my balls because you're like, say it in the full name again.

And I'm like, yeah, you gotta.

I always say the full name. And if I knew Orion's last name, I would pimp him out. But, but there are so many people that I end up bringing up and I'm like, I can't find them on Facebook. There was a girl named Jenny Taylor. Shout out. In fourth grade. Her parents were scientists. They came in to teach a science lesson twice a year. And they were. One of them looked like David the gnome. Google it if you don't. A tiny little healthy man with a beard and even talked like a little gnome. And the mom was gnomesque as well. And they were both like 5ft tall, just a one and a half. Brad Williams. And Jenny thought she was a cat. I don't know what they fed her, probably kibbles and bits. And she, in class, I'd say 2 hours out of every school day would out of nowhere or the teacher would call on her and she'd go and just wouldn't answer back. And then one day she scratched rip misses McQuay. And I've never laughed harder since she killed misses McQuay. Scratch.

Just from a scratch.

Oh no, sorry. R I. I said r I p.

Adam, you can't do that. People think you scratched her to death.

I mean, it would be very fun.

A student just scratching someone to death.

But imagine seeing a kid. I'm in fifth grade was a fourth 5th split. She's in fourth grade. And it's my again, the same way Orion was my first taste of a hippie kid in high school that fucked everybody. You know, here I'm trying to do my best. I'm like. I'm trying to be, hey, maybe I'll do jokes or memorize an Nsync dance to perform at the dance with my Filipino friend. Right? And here comes Jenny Taylor acting like a fucking house pet. And I'd never seen that.

Was she attractive? Were you attracted to Jenny Taylor?

No, I'm not a cat guy, first of all.

Really?

No.

You mentioned a cat guy girl. I'm a cat guy girl.

I'm a. You're.

I'm a cat guy.

I'm a cat woman guy cat.

I mean, I said it wrong and I'm still gonna stick with it. I'm a cat guy girl.

What does that mean?

I'm a cat guy. If you're a girl, yes, but not if you're a cat. I'm not a cat guy. I'm a cat guy girl.

Okay.

She's a cat girl. I like it.

Who you voting for?

I think if there's something 2024, I better believe. You know. I think you know who I'm voting for, dude.

I do.

John Kerry. Run again?

Why not?

Dead.

He might be close to it.

Damn, dude. I just thought about that in rip and sometimes.

No, we would have heard about it.

That's why I say stuff on these shows. Sometimes people do die right after we mentioned their John Kerry is 80 years old. Still alive. Still alive.

There's a lot of people at 80 right now that are clicking and ticking. Shout out to my stepdad, George, 81. Shout out to my real dad.

81 years old. Unbelievable.

And my dad's 80. Well, did take a spill. He's in patient rehab, doing his best. But I will say this about cats real quick. And I know you have a sweet pup dogs. If they somehow are lucky enough to watch you fuck and you lock eyes with them, which I love to. It's adorable. They're just. They're confused. They don't really know what's going on. So I can lock eyes for a minute and not be too faced. A cat. And this has not happened, I'm assuming, because they're so judgmental to begin with, I think if they look, you looked over and you saw a cat looking at you fucking, they'd be like, you think she likes this? Dude? Look at the face you're making, you sick. Fuck. I'm gonna eat you when you go to sleep because cats are.

She would just slowly walk by and go, smell.

Babe. She was meowing. She meowed. She pointed to it. So you're high.

Okay. Yes. But by the way, tried to take, like, a 50 milligram Eddie one time to knock out. Couldn't sleep. You know, I don't get great sleep.

Me neither.

Took one. Just pet the dog. I was just petting the dog for, like, 5 hours. I'm not kidding. I was just petting the dog.

Sounds incredible.

Couldn't go to bed. I know it was, but I was like, I'm not gonna sleep. I'm just gonna pet the dog. And I just was, like, playing with her, thinking, talking to her. I would talk to her. Full conversations.

Wait, 50 milligrams?

Yeah, I was too much.

Yeah, I did 80 once and was this close to calling Cedar Sinai to pick me up.

Yeah, I've only done a 50 like that, like, a few times in my life. I don't like that. I think anything over 20 is not. It's not necessary.

I'm a sweet five to ten if I really want to. Just kind of zone out 20 if.

I want to get fucking wrecked, if I want to get baked, I'll do that.

My wife took me to Zach Bryan country. Never seen him ripped.

Yeah, he's super talented.

Oh, yeah. And know what's crazy? She's like, he cheated on his girlfriend or wife, but, like, it's just flourishing. And I'm looking at him like, yeah, he's got, like, a cool goatee, sleeveless shirt on stage. He's ripping it looks like a dude that I wouldn't not buy that from. But also, I'm like, seems like a guy that would overcome that, you know? And also, I don't know the ins and outs.

Yeah, just a cool guy.

There's cool. I mean, think about any show. We were talking about this the other day. So many cool tv shows that we've seen in the last couple of years. And I go, do you realize that most of them involve some sort of infidelity? And it's. It depends on how, like, well, the character is that you're, like, you're rooting them on, you know?

Yeah. Like a. Well, that's like a. It feels like every episode of the Kardashians though. Yes. It's like the social. Well, drama. Everyone's obsessed with, like, public drama. Oh, I fucking. We want to see countries.

We love gossip and drama. Isn't that. Isn't that wild? We love the feel good stories. You see? I mean, I'll go down these dark rabbit holes. Dude, I got fucking cried for probably. You want to talk about petting a dog? I was wiping tears away for probably 2 hours.

Why?

On a little Eddie late at night, couldn't sleep, went down rabbit holes of, first of all, it was 911 conspiracy videos. Swiped that away.

Love.

Swipe that away to soldiers coming home early to surprise their kids.

Love.

And when you're baked and you see, like, a guy dressed as, like, a bobcat and this kid's playing the cello, and you're like, turn around, caleb. Your dad's back from Iraq. And surprise, he's also a bobcat. And then he takes off the bobcat thing and the kid's like, ah. And then he's like, dad. And they fucking cry or at basketball games or wherever. Or these ones are now getting me and probably cause being a child of divorce and my sister being adopted, which, by the way, I used to, and we just talked about this, and I'll get back to that in a second. When my sister and I used to fight a lot, I used to throw her being adopted in her face a lot. She goes, do you remember doing that? I go, oh, I'm so sorry. I go, but you were a cunt.

Yeah.

And you, and you were adopted, and you were adopted, so it wasn't new information.

Sorry about that. And I'm not sorry now that I think about it.

But I said to her, I go, I go. I started doing this bit on stage where I talk about our fights and I go, I go, yeah. I go, we're good now. But typical sibling rivalry, you know, she'd throw a ninja turtle in the toilet, you know, I'd fart in a cup, make her smell it. She'd pass out, wake up, lock me in the garage, I'd escape. Lock her in the garage. She'd escape, throw another turtle in the toilet, make fun of me for being a fat kid and having bigger tits than our mom. She was adopted. So I was like, you mean my mom? And then that usually was the end of the fight. But what a fucked up thing to do as a kid.

Yeah, mean, but, you know, sibling stuff is.

Yeah, but that's a deep, like, I thought she was gonna be like, you call me stupid, or I room smelled.

I used to dislocate my sister's arms all the time.

Well, that's cool.

Yeah, I would just. I would yank an arm so hard, I'd pop it out.

Okay. Oh, my God.

Well, the physical, when I was playing with her, I would just whip her around and just dislocate her arm. And then one time she got her hand stuck at the VCR and she was grabbing something, and then she got nervous. Cause it clamped down maybe or something, and she pulled too fast. And then she did it. She was crying, and my dad was like, I didn't do it this time. I did it. Do it of all times.

Yeah. Isn't that so? Kids are resilient.

By the way, the VCR, the tape.

Was too far back.

That's why your hand in there. What are you doing?

That's like, dude, that's like putting your dick in a glory hole that you've never seen before.

Well, fun.

Okay.

No, it's more like sticking your hand down the sink. The sinker. Raider thing.

Oh, whoa.

You panic.

Panic waiting. Yeah. Always subconsciously, you're like, someone's going to come around the corner and go flip.

You know, in the last place we lived in, we didn't. We didn't have one of those things. And I actually was like, oh, man, why don't we have it? Loved it. Because we had a little net catcher and threw it away. And I also never had to think about sticking my hand down in the sink. It was a little bit. It was almost better. And I was like, wow, those things are always broken or clogged or screwed up or they smell.

Yeah.

And I thought, that's actually old school. Sometimes old school is the right school. Sometimes. Sometimes you're like, man, the OG version is better.

Well, we all do that. How many times have you had that conversation? I also do think that there is a lot of value in the comparison of, like, music was better when we came up. Sports were better. Like, you look at the NBA now. Yeah, dude, way softer. There's never a fight. It's pushing.

No one's different now. It's so different.

Different. That's a better way of saying it's a shooter game.

It's just all shoot sitcoms.

You go, sitcoms were better. Well, yeah, but we were in the sitcom role. There were less channels.

Right.

We didn't have the money or. Or ability to think bigger than that. The succession sopranos, that wasn't. We were looking at fucking Danny Tanner and Steve Urkel.

Sopranos was like, the first series that opened it up. That was like, holy shit. Like, you can make, like, really, like, cool, deep, dark, artsy, sexy, long form tv. I mean, for me, I mean, there was a lot of other things that existed, but can I tell you the first time I was like, holy shit. Just started it in your life. You've never seen sopranos?

Psych. We got you there. We got you there. We got you there.

Where?

You're my new prank call code. Fuck you, Andrew.

Fuck you, Andrew. Please sign up below to donate to our fuck you campaign right now. Every dollar donated is gonna fuck me way more. That's the first time you've ever seen it?

I can't get enough. I'm two episodes in.

Oh, my God.

Wow, dude, the through line of him and the therapy. Is that the whole show?

Don't give it away.

Spoiler alert, you might have Tom Hakes funks Jenny while she's got HIV. And that's how gump.

Is he smart or is he like me?

It's the best cry. If you want to talk about another cry, cry anytime. It would pop.

Give me cry moments in movie. Go give me your best cry.

That one. Because he's like, is he smart? Always stupid. She's like, he's the smartest fucking kid.

He doesn't say stupid. He says, is he like me?

Yeah. Which we didn't want to say, but, you know, every sort of burgers and tismo and so. And then he looks up and he's like, I'm watching Barton Ernie. And he's like, that's my favorite character. And then Haley Joel was like, you always gonna talk like that? No. And then they took. And they took him to the bus, and then Jenny passed, like, two days later, but, yeah. When? When? That moment's a good one. Oh, man.

I got one for you.

Go ahead.

Plane. Strange automobiles.

Oh, my God.

I like me, John Candy. I like me. My wife likes me. Oh, my God, dude, that rail ripped me every time.

I'll give you another candy moment.

Yeah. Yeah. Uncle Buck, no cool runnings. Oh, yeah.

The end of that movie, dude. Fucking.

Oh, my God.

I'm not joking. Like, I know that's kind of. It's a Disney. Those type of Disney movies were so. I don't know, dude. Genuine. The story was great.

It was really nice. It was really wholesome.

But candy adds so much.

Oh, my God.

The guy was beyond his any, really. I don't think he was ever acting. I wish there was a biopic or at least some sort of. It was probably a book just about his life. I'd love to see a documentary, actually. And hearing all the people that knew and loved him talk about him. And sometimes when there hasn't been one, part of me starts to wander down this road of like, oh, was he just like a wife?

No, he was a good dude.

He was.

Yeah, he was a good dude.

Because why haven't people come out to really.

I mean, some things you gotta let, you know, let sleeping dogs lie, you know, like, some things are so. I think sometimes you're like, why are we. Why are we doing this? Just leave it alone. It was so nice how it was.

What are you gonna.

It's the same thing with, you know, with Farley. It's almost like, leave it alone.

I was just gonna say that.

So great.

I know. It was unbelievable. And I. He's gonna probably dump everything he's got into that and, you know. But, man, but you're right. My initial thought was like, oh, yeah, cuz there's some way just like, how do you. There's. I don't know if you can really win there.

The legend is bigger than the story. So it's like we already feel a type of way about it. It's hard to like, you know, retroactively be like redrumming up the fantasy you already have about somebody. I know. Candy, son. It's a great dude. Chris.

Chris Candy.

Yeah. And he's great dude. Cool dude. Funny.

Wonka's competitor.

It is Chris. Yeah. And his brother Steve. Chips. Yes.

Of all potato chips.

Well, not all, but most, to be honest with you.

Can I tell you something real quick? Business class senior of high school. We had a Vietnam war vet named Mister Moore. And he was a short little guy with beard, glasses, just walking around. All right, all right. Talking. Great businessman. He'd always throw out extra credit. He loved to just give extra credit. He'd go, great business. First of all, Vietnam War vet. He would face the class like I am now. The door to enter the class was behind him. And people would always come in during the class to give like a note to the teacher. And he broke a kid's nose because the kid tapped him on the shoulder. And he goes and fucking. And the kids are like, what the fuck? He's like, what did I tell you about coming up behind me? Vietnam War, man. Vietnam War. Another day in classic. He was clicking his pen. Sounded like somebody was loading a fucking gun. He just goes, what the fuck is that? And then just kid jobs was like that. And then Miss Rowe goes, God fucking. And just walks out. And I look over at Josh, I go, good one, Josh. Kid starts crying.

Fucking sucks.

Way to go, Adam.

Yeah, I know, dude. And then the last one was my buddy, Dale Tan. Asian kid, took a picture in class and he screams, fucking Charlie. Walks out of the fucking room.

Charlie.

Yeah, dude. And walks out of the. Walks out of the room.

Can't drum it up. You can't do that.

You can't do that. The writing's on the wall. But he would do this thing with extra credit. He'd go, famous businessman. Famous businessman. Who do we got? Who do we got? And he'd say, somebody like.

Warren Buffett.

Warren Buffet. And then the guy who created McDonald's is Ray Kroc. Yeah. So we'd say those. And then I just started going, Mark Costco. Mark Costco. Ten points. Adam Ray John Palest shoes. Adam Ray, 20 points. Allen Baskin and Steve Robbins. Adam Ray on fire. Three in a row. And it was. And I'm just looking over my best, but Adam French is like, dude, are.

You getting points for creativity no matter what?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Kim Jamba Juice. Adam Wright.

Adam Wright.

Doesn't stop. Won't stop. Can't stop.

Tammy, target. And if he stops you, he goes, that's. She did not start target. They acquired it. That was just a coincidence.

You gotta. Yeah, check your facts.

Yeah. Check your facts, Adam.

Right, but there is, I think, the, like, biopic stuff. Better chance to get it made if it's more in the past, right? Because we have seen less. No, less, like Mahat Ali. Like, I just feel like more people are probably like, oh, yeah, I want to see what that life was like. Farley, you.

We've seen so much.

Yeah.

Well, I'm sure they're gonna dig up a lot of great stuff. I was gonna say candy. What's wild is.

Oh, yeah, I'm sorry.

No, no, no. When I went, sometimes, you know, I've only hung with him a few times, and he's friends with a couple other people I know. And. But when I do, there are a couple of moments, I look at him and I'll go, oh, man. It's just like. You look just like your dad. But I would never say it. Can't say it.

That's so cool.

Cause it's a weird thing to say, but he will look exactly like a movement or a thing. And I'm like, holy shit, bro.

That's so awesome.

It's kind of wild.

Norm Macdonald son has that. I saw him a clip of him accepting an award on Norman's behalf at a canadian Emmys or something. And it was a weird award, though. Not even canadian Emmys, like, just an award show that was. Have you seen this kid at all? He is a carbon copy, and it's awesome. And it's really kind of emotional.

How old is he?

I want to say 24, 25.

Maybe mid twenties.

Yeah. And he goes, oh, accepting this award for the, you know, Donny, you know, chipper comedy award. You know, I always remember before my dad died, he said, God, I wish I. Too bad I never got to win a Donny Chipper award. Just kind of start shitting on the.

Whole thing, just like he would have done.

Oh, it was. And everyone wanted to see what he looks like. Martin Short was like, all these canadian greats were there to, like, kind of also.

Were you there? You were present for this?

I just watched the clip on YouTube.

What's his son's name?

Oh, man, I don't know. Fuck it. Old.

His name's old.

Put it together, dude.

Okay. We'll be right back, dude, tell me, by the way, as long as I've known you, we've known each other for a long, long time.

Long, long time.

People may know. We've been since we both started, I think big time since we both started.

Which is extra cool in just. People don't realize. And I'll let you get to what you're gonna say. People don't realize how cool it is from. I mean, I get messages or people come at me sometimes being like, it's so cool. Right?

Yeah, it looks like him pretty close.

About knowing somebody as long as you have, but being in it. And there's an extra level for us of just really knowing the grind of it. So just an extra respect, but all history. But also what's really cool to me is that, like, talking to you now is no different than when I talked to you when we first started hanging out.

No, it's the same.

It is the same.

Nothing.

But then just things are cooler and more opportunities and more fun experiences and.

Well, and your. And the growth has been great to watch.

Yeah.

Come here. He's got some. Oh, thank you.

Both of us.

Look at this. You get a smoothie for him? No. No, that's for him. That's for him.

Suck it down. Is it a boba tea?

No, it's just I didn't eat today.

You're smoothing it, you know?

Should I?

No, I mean, bro, I would smooth you over food all day. Actually, that's not true. There's certain foods I need.

No food I need. But I haven't eaten this morning because I've been running around like a madman.

I don't eat probably till the afternoon. I'm just not hungry till then.

Never in the morning.

Coffee and, like, an egg, just to tide me through. That's enough.

One egg.

All right, five.

Good boy. You know, it's so funny. I'm a two egg guy, but then you'll go to a place and they're like, our omelets are made with three to four eggs. I'm like, cut it out. Oh, yeah, cut it out.

There's an.

I'm gonna eat all four. I know if it's there, but just don't do that.

There's an omelet in a. There's a place called Beth's Diner in Seattle. Man versus food. Ditting on it. They have one of those. They have an omelet that's like, I think, 4ft or four by four.

What are we. What are we talking about?

It's unreal. And I went there after my tenure, high school graduation with two of my best buds. And we went there and it was like 04:00 a.m. and we made it. And one of them fell asleep sitting up holding a fork to his mouth. And we tried to get. We got like one square and it was like. And they douse it with hash browns. Yeah.

I can't do it.

Looks amazing when you're fucked up.

Yeah.

But then you just realize you're a barnyard animal. He's in bad.

Poor man versus food thing. Twelve eggs.

You just looked that up.

That's his whole job. That's the only reason.

Yeah. Man versus food. Yeah. And poor Adam Richmond. I hope I get a shirt out of this, you know? And it was just. But dude, he was just sweating.

I mean, he had to quit that because of. It was so bad for him.

Some of the guy took over in Spurlock, just died. But I don't think that was related.

I think was cancer.

Was it?

Yeah, I think was cancer from the Big Macs. He was an alcoholic, that's all.

Oh, fuck, man.

That's what super seismic was actually about.

If you let it like. Oh, wow.

I had heard he had a trouble. He was struggling with drugs and alcohol. He had said he admitted that before, but. Did he die from an alcohol related disease? I thought he died from cancer. I mean, cancer is everything. Cancer is everything.

You're so in right now.

Thank you. Hey, it's me. I'm cancer. I'm everywhere. You're gonna get me.

In here. We pour whiskey.

Whisk. Hey, folks. Today's episode of Whiskey Ginger is brought to you by rabbit hole distillery, straight from Louisville, Kentucky. These guys are seriously redefining the standards of bourbon. Their motto says it all. No shortcuts, no compromise. Nothing left to chance. Come on, that's not inspirational. I don't know what is. This means every tiny detail and their whiskey making process is finely tuned to perfection. It's no wonder their bourbon and rye whiskeys keep racking up the awards they just cleaned up at the San Francisco world spirits competition, pulling in gold and double golds left and right. Everywhere you turn, trophies are coming at their face. Here's what really sets them apart. All bourbon is aged in chard barrels. But every drop of rabbit hole is aged in charred and toasted barrels. That is special. Think of, like, toasting like a marshmallow or something like that, drawing out deep, bold, caramelized flavors that make every single sip rich, smooth experience. They're all about keeping things tight and small with these small batches. Only 15 barrels each. That's super rare. That's great. That's how rabbit hole ensures every bottle has more than just crafted its handpicked treasure. Small batch, big flavor.

Sip up. If you're looking for the perfect gift, just want to treat yourself. Rabbit hole stands out as a one of a kind choice. I've been sipping this sauce for quite a while. Talk to you guys about it for quite a while. Big fan for the price .1 of the best whiskeys on the market, in my opinion. In its price point, it is delicious. It's smooth, it's pure. Let it sit on your tongue for a while. Find out for yourself. Head over to rabbitholedistillery.com. use that promo code rabbit for $5 off your first order. Rabbitholedistillery.com promo code Rabbit for $5 off your first order. Treat yourself or someone special to a bourbon that's crafted with passion, not just produced. Dive into the rabbit hole and discover something extraordinary. This episode of Whiskey Ginger is brought to you by Squarespace. Hey, I've talked about Squarespace so much on this show. What's going on? You must know how much I love it, and I use it. I've been using it for a long, long time. Squarespace blueprint AI, and SEO tools can help you build the perfect site. No matter what you're doing, you're selling something. You're promoting yourself.

You have a product to sell. Or you just want to put yourself out there to the world. Start a completely personalized website with the new guided design system, Squarespace blueprint. Choose from professionally curated layout and styling options to build a unique online presence from the ground up, tailored to your brand or business, and optimize for every device. Easily. Launch your website and get discovered fast with integrated, optimized SEO tools so you show up more often to people and grow the way you want. That's the best part. I love it. I really do love using Squarespace so much. What they've created over the years has made it so convenient for me to find out where my clicks are coming from through their analytics. Also to help out fans if they're buying stuff, you have flexible payment options there. Make checkout seamless for your customers. You can accept credit cards, PayPal, Apple Pay, all sorts of stuff, no matter what you're selling. And with fluid engine, the next generation website editor from Squarespace, it's never been easier for anybody to unlock unbreakable creativity. You can really just, you know, change the scope of what websites used to look like.

They were all standard. The old days were so funny. I mean, they look like they were all made in word. But now, with Squarespace, you have the ability to do so much and create such a beautiful, seamless website. So if you're looking for that, I don't know where else you would turn other than to Squarespace. You must go head over to squarespace.com for a free trial. When you're ready to launch, go to squarespace.com whiskey to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Squarespace.com, comma, check it out. Okay. For free. And then when you're ready to launch, go to squarespace.com whiskey to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.

Ginger.

I like gingers.

You know, speaking of DP, doctor Phil is interviewing Trump, or did, and it's. I think it comes out tonight, and I'm so excited to watch. I did see a clip.

You interviewed Trump?

No, I'm sorry. The real doctor Phil interviewed. Oh, dude.

I was like, holy shit.

Coming out.

I know people that have, people that know everyone on this show probably knows. Your doctor Phil was such a great, fun character that you've now parlayed into something so wonderful. And we all watched it happen, and I thought, oh, he's humming along. He's got something really, really wonderful with that.

He sent me a bunch of really nice texts, which were nice, but also, I didn't do.

My assistant did that. But I'm glad you did get them.

I know he signed, not Andrew no, I did.

I had it because I wanted to show you love, and I love you.

For that, but it also, and you know, this, when you get those little boosts from buds that. That you, you know, we don't need it, but. But we all do without thinking about it.

But it gave me.

It gave me a little extra juice of, like, I feel like I'm, you know, that. All right, cool. I'm on the right path with this, you know, because I'm like, I respect you comedically. Offstage, not so much, but on stage a lot. And so I'm like, all right, cool. If Andy's into it, then I'm.

And you're all good.

Yeah. And your episode with Bobby, look, the one we just did with Sally and Dak shepherd and Rick Glassman and Blake Griffin popped by and did a great bit and then stayed and partied all night, and we talked about you and the charity event, and I think I'm going to try to pop on that with you guys. Yes. But your episode with Bobby is. There's just no topping it, and I'm sorry.

I mean, that was one of the most fun nights we had. Me and Bob Lee were out there.

It was, people, the amount of messages I still get, and it was honestly a turning point in the show because it was the first time I added another element with, like, fahim, and it was the first time that was awesome that the show and watching you laugh so hard is, like, one of my favorite things.

Well, you had no idea what that was. One of those guys, he can really. He. He can make me laugh harder than almost any comedian in the business.

He's unbelievably talented, but having that, and then it. The way that, like, we brought a guy up on stage and the kiss.

Then you smoked a huge joint, which I never done.

And then the rap battle.

Yeah, it was great.

So that there was just. It made me go, oh, that's what this show is. I already was open to, like, no rules. It goes how it goes. I'm driving. I always say to people, I don't give any prep because people ask questions. Even Dax, I'd never met. So we chatted for a bit backstage so I could get some, let him know, get a sense of my vibe, and he did well. But we never had three guests on the same time, too, which was a challenge and really listening and divvying up and trying to let everybody be themselves. But also, I'm still, you know, we were all figuring it out as Sal and Rick know each other. Sal and Rick and Dax, but sal. So it was new. Kind of just finding that rhythm, but now knowing, like, okay, cool. Like, each show is going to have, like, the next ones. Oh, and we also had Justin Wilman on this last show, the comedy edition. Unreal, dude. Staff is losing their mind. And so many people, fans of them. Next show is how I, Mandel, Nick Schwartz, and I haven't announced this yet, but now I am.

And Jon Kite is going to play Jeff Bridges, full on prosthetic. And Mark Summers, the host of double dares, coming to do a whole double dare.

Well, be careful. Don't get slimed.

Cause it's jizz the slime, as we know from watching the Nickelodeon documentary, if.

Anything was revealed on that whole thing.

And I also want to say, I think the bad Friends episode with Phil is up to 55 billion views.

Is it really? How many views is that? Dude? No. What is it? Really?

Real quick. It jumped to a mill real quick.

No, really.

I was watching that shit.

You know, it's so funny. I never watched things back, because if we live inside of them, I just. I want to remember they were in.

The exact same way.

Yeah. Oh, 1.8.

Wow. Pretty good, right?

Really?

How many months ago?

Wow.

Okay. It was the first time, too, that I did a intimate filth.

I really liked it. Really like it. I like that you've done the character. I hope you. You gonna tour around the country with it or what?

Probably in two weeks. Announcing.

Well, you can announce it now. This will come out in two weeks.

I don't know. We haven't locked it. I've gotten.

Well, just say it. Who gives a shit?

So I believe there'll be a doctor Phil live theater tour, and I believe a Chicago theater is on the.

Let's go.

I'm gonna do everything in my power to fly out for when?

Do you know when it's gonna be? Maybe fall.

Everything's gonna be in the fall. Yeah, it's gonna be like a Friday and Saturday, I think two months, two weeks out of the month. And they're going for it. These promoters, a bunch of them. I mean, look, it's. The show exists at the store, and the intimacy of it there is so beautiful, and the staff gets jacked up for it. I feel like I'm taken care of. We got dialed in with the sound and audio that's spatially conducive for my guys. That film it. It's easy. Jelly rolled. Never been to the comedy store. Blake had once, but there's a cool thing there where I'm bringing in people. It's not the reason they're coming, but it's added to, like, jelly rolls. Like, holy shit. Polly came on, took him around, gave him a tour. That's extra cool for me, man, where it's like, oh, and just the magic of the store, working there, being there for so long. It's never lost me on the main room stage, too, that I'm like, I have created a show now that is so fun. Flexing is many of the tools I've, you know, honed or whatever, but also it's like, dude, I remember when I first would come through and I was like, fucking Robin Williams and the comic store players there, obviously Chappelle and prior specials.

I don't know, man. It's just that main room is just always so, like, woe to me. And I know I'll fall into weeks and months probably, like anybody, of taking it for granted and just being like, running in, doing your spot. But some more often than not, I'll try to really, like, if I'm sitting around and hanging, like, looking around, being like, the fuck out of here, man.

Yeah, but it's nice to be reflective. You need those moments. But truth be told, it's.

The show hopefully, is going to be a little part of, like, a little. People fly out for it, man. It's wild, dude. But it's also, it's cool. And you know this because, I mean, you've, you're a enormous example of this, of creating your own good luck, but also creating something that is yours, you know, to where it's like. And I think I said that to you when we were talking about some, some money stuff. And it was like, it's cool that all these people like, that you and Bobby want to jump on so quick was huge for the show.

Oh, yeah.

Because you guys are a fucking force.

Well, I mean, you're, you're my boy.

Totally.

But there's gonna be so much fun with me and that idiot.

And now. But that hasn't. But that type of shit. The amount of people that hit me up that I really respect, that know and sometimes don't know because of seeing that were like, all right, like that I had bugged, were like, wow, I just watched, like, I didn't. Sorry I didn't get back to you. So down. That looks so fun.

Well, that makes me feel good. We did our part. Cause I wanted to go and have fun. I was like, I'm just, I just, you know, I just. Now in my career, I. All I want to do is have more fun. I just want to have more fun.

Yeah.

I don't know. I just want to do things that I want to do, and I don't want to do things anymore. I don't want to.

Well, that's why I started doing the show. I was losing joy. Not for the business, but I was just not, you know, and I've talked about this with you sometimes. At the time when we were making videos, when you were doing Duncan rocks. Yeah, I'm doing sketches.

Yeah.

Like, to me, that was such a fulfilling time because it was like, man control. Creating shit from the ground up, getting to, like, you know, no rules.

There's no rules.

Yeah. And trying to really find your way and figure out what you're doing. And it's like, that's what I was like, fuck, I just gotta, you know, strike was going on, and it was like, I need. I don't want to. I'm doing stand up all the time. And not that I'm getting burnout, but I'm just like, it's getting monotonous.

Yeah.

And, like, you knowing that I have other skills to bring and. And the stage is what you make of it. So it's like you guys with your bad friends, too. I mean, look at that. It's like, there's so many things to do and why get settled into, like, I'm just a comic or whatever, and it's like, I'm not. And so, no, I'm a comedian. Yeah.

Yeah. There's a difference. You're not just a comic. You're a comedian. I want. I like to touch a few bases. I like to. Character stuff is fun and get it. It's really. When you get to explore, it's the best version of it. When you're like, I get to explore. Like, I get to explore. They're exploring, you know, as an audience, but it's so nice that when you get to explore and you're not just kind of giving them. You know, it's almost like you're the huge. Used to do tours at universal.

Yeah.

You know, it's like you're not giving them the same tour. You get to fucking change it up and. And you get to lie about who lives in that building, you know? No, Spielberg actually sleeps inside there.

Oh, okay. Did you take my tour?

Yeah.

A lot of times I got busted from bosses secretly riding my tram, being like, you gotta. You gotta stop saying that. Kurt Rambis filmed escape from L. A. It's Kurt Russell. And I was like, nobody cares.

No, but he was playing basketball in the morning, and then he filmed in the afternoon.

Or I would say. I mean, the biggest thing is when I freaked out at Jaws and made a ten year old girl cry because I was fresh out of BFA acting school from UFC. And I was like, sweet mother of God. Rip my sunglasses off, jump out of the tram, would get close to going into the water, and I'm like, Steve. Steve. And I come back and one day, dude, I don't know how. I think I just was, you know, hopped up on my own. Adrenaline fucking produced, like, some tears. And I get back on the tram, and they had just installed cameras that are on you. And so I'm fucking sitting. I'm like, um, well, this was supposed to be a fun tour.

Ruining a child's vacation.

On your right is Wisteria Lane, where the desperate housewives live.

I can't do this.

And I fucking. And then this kid. I just hear this kid, and then I hear this dad look up, and he goes, hey, man. And I was like, okay. He just knew that. He's like, hey, actor boy.

Yeah, slow down.

Enough with the bitch.

Slow it down. Just bawling. There's the friends fountain. Anybody want to jump in?

Oh, my God. Yeah. Anytime. Buddies would ride the tram, I'd always, like, make up movies that were, like, almost like erotic films and say they starred them over there. That's where Kramer jumped in the tank in Seinfeld. And that tank was also used for deep throat six, starring Josh Piley. Like for. That's for him. His buddies, a few people who just got it were like, by the way.

He'S on a book tour right now. I just saw a couple interviews. Do you see these Kramers? Yeah. Oh, I think it's a book tour. I'm almost positive. But he did, like, the view or something like that. Didn't he just do the view?

Andrew, it's. I'm sorry, dude.

The interviews are.

The video will live in infamy, and you can't come back from it. Hey, you said the n word not.

Once, not twice, but three times.

And scream. The two of the studio, you screaming on the street, and you pointed to the feet and you said the n wind.

You said the n word and you meant it. Was he on a book tour? Yeah. You know what's so harmful about that? Yeah.

And he does. Playing a character. How about when he goes on Letterman.

And Jared's like, well, that was funny.

You want to apologize? Dave goes, this is not funny. Letterman didn't give a fuck. He's like, this is great tv. So he's like, Michael, how are you? And he goes, I've been better, Dave. And Dave goes, ha ha.

I bet.

So, yeah, I bet you. What a week, huh? Yeah, the best part of that video too. Fraser Smith getting up right after Michael drops the emboss and walks off stage. And Fraser goes, all right, all right. How about that, guys?

These are the jokes.

Can I tell you a quick story? So funny. A week later, a week earlier, I met Michael Richards at the belly room. Stop me if I've told this story before. I don't think I have. He's in the belly room, just getting back into stand up. I walk back there, belly room of the comedy store. It's a bringer show. I'm about. I don't know what. Can you mind looking up the year that crane, I think it was. I want to say it was four to five years.

I found a joke book. It just said say n word in it over and over.

It was my joke book. And he was like, do you mind if I borrow this?

Well, then who'd you get that from? From me. I learned it from you, dad.

And so. So he started stand up two months.

That was when he did the video. That was when the thing came out. God, that was so long.

Wild, dude. So. So he's still can't recover from that. That's crazy.

No, that's so long ago.

Let me ask you this. If it was just an hour, if there was no video proof, and it was an article.

Mm hmm.

And it was like, you know, hearsay. And it was like, he did this. I've been trying to wreck my brain about. Does it have the same impact? Because then people were just like, nah. The video is so alarming.

It's just so hard.

And it wasn't one. He doubled down. That's. That's where my stomach goes, oh. And then he starts walking around, and the guy screaming back, being like, that's not cool. And the guy sounds like. The guy sounds like a, like, oh, careful.

You weren't gonna do this, Adam.

I mean, for comedy sake.

Wow.

Very funny. If I just done that without actually. But I know how to read the room.

Read the room.

That was my first special.

He should call his special read the room.

That's so funny. He really should. Or, oops. So he's in the green room, and I go. I go, holy shit. What's up, man? And I go, dude, what are you doing here? He goes, do stand up on the show tonight. I go, awesome. You get back into it. He goes, yeah. I started saying. But go, yeah, you started stand up. It's kind of how you got going, right? So I said, we did a show called Fridays, and then I got on this sitcom, and that kind of did well and took me out of it for a while. And I go, what sitcom was that? He goes, oh, there's a show called Seinfeld. I got. Dude, I'm fucking with you. I'm sorry. Amazing, dude, this is wild that you're here right now. You were my favorite part of the show. No joke.

Yeah.

I mean, truly, dude, he was unreal on that show.

Yeah, he was so funny.

Goes up, he's like, I don't really. Oh. I go, it's working out some material. Yeah. He goes, I don't really have an act. And I go, bing bong. Goes, the racism bing bong, here it comes. And I go, should I talk about the Jews?

Talking about the Mexicans?

He starts running all this by me. So he goes. He goes up there and slaughters for about 15 minutes two drunk girls in the front. Does crowd work with them? Berates them. It's fun. He's doing crank, you know. You guys driving home? Yeah, yeah. Unless you want to come with us. Oh, boy.

Oh, that's great.

Crushing, dude. I'm like, wow, dude. I'm like, in my head, I'm like. I'm watching the early days of Michael Richards getting back into stand up and who knows what. But this is exciting. That's why I remember walking away from.

Took away a little bit your shine at that night, and you put on that n word hex on him. You're like, say the n word. At your next show.

He asked me before he went up, he goes, what should I talk about? I go, speak from the heart, dude. Whenever you're pushed up against a wall, say what you want, say what you mean. Say what you mean, but mean what you say.

Mm hmm.

So literally, a week, maybe two later, and I'm just like. And I remember, you know, I told a few buddies that, holy shit, I met Michael Richards. And they're all hit me up, being like, dude, what'd you tell them? You know? Cuz that was it. That was. I mean, and that was also the beginning of TMZ, man. How they could not have, oh, my God, they around waiting for a video like that? Or do you think they were like, now that we have this, how did.

Somebody get a video of it in the first place? It wasn't from the factory.

Somebody recorded it on, like a flip phone.

Dude, what are the chances?

Pre iPhone too, right?

No, 2006 was just when the iPhone one came out.

Like, oh, but it was not. But it was grainy footage. It was not.

Would have been great if you sat in the room with them really quiet, didn't say anything to him, and then finally just go, hard r. Huh? You gonna hard r it?

I have a new joke about my dog pickle. She barks anytime there's a, say, black people on stage. And I told my buddy, go, fuck, I think she's racist. And I go, she also barks at, like, dogs. But to me, I'm just like, she's jealous she didn't get to read for that part. But when she barks at black people, he goes. He goes, dude, it's probably just coincidence. I go, she barks with a hard.

R. Yeah, we can tell. That's great. That's great.

Yeah.

How she really does, by the way, your dog is racist. Every time I'm around her, I'm always like, that's a racist dog. But that's why I love her.

How, how are you? How do all the dates go? Or do you still have more coming up?

I've only got one more. San Francisco. I did six clubs, and then I'm gonna do theaters in the fall, a big fall theater tour.

Right up into shooting it.

Right up into shooting the special. Yeah.

How do you feel? It's nice to take your time with it, isn't it?

I wanted to. I just. I just want to peel through it the way I want to peel through it. You know? There's stuff that I want to, like, manipulate more and all that stuff.

And how do you know? You know, how do you know when you're. And this is a question I get asked nom comics. You don't. They're like, how do you know when you're done? I'm like, bro, there's stuff I can't help but keep playing with. It's on my special.

Yeah.

Like, and subscribe dropping June 16. Sorry, it's out now.

It's out right now. Please watch out right now. It's on the YouTube.

It's on my YouTube. YouTube.com. adam Ray, comedy. Like and subscribe. Film the comedy on state in Madison.

Wisconsin, one of the best clubs that have ever existed.

Oh, yeah, baby. Shout out to them. Shout out to Jesse who directed it. Shout out to Madison. The whole staff at Common State, 800 pound. Help me get it going. Very proud of it. Putin introduces me. Up top. Mama Ray's up there. Yeah, but there's stuff from that that I can't help but like in a, not the same bit, but it, where I'm like, man, now if I. It's a piece, it would be, it'd be a great complimentary piece, but, but, you know, can find a way to work it elsewhere. But you just don't know, man.

No.

And, you know, I guess you just maybe having the deadline of the special, you know?

Yeah, I think you kind of know when you need to put something to bed. Like, oh, I think I'm done doing it. And I just kind of want it to stop. But, but you could always keep playing with something. I mean, you know, this is like, if someone who's a painter, if you're talking someone who like, paints, they could keep adding shit forever if they want. At some point you have to stop and just go, okay, okay, I can't.

Yep.

I can't keep doing this, otherwise I'm gonna, you know, go.

Unless you're Bob Ross. He could have painted trees until he passed away.

Yeah, but he wouldn't paint a tree and then go back to the tree. Once he painted the tree, it was done.

Do you think he fucked like that? Do you think he was like, I'm just gonna eat your little pussy right here.

Happy little pussy.

Couple little fingers right here.

Happy little pussy.

I put a fist in that might be a thumb or mouth.

Oh, is that a bird? She's like, Bob, please, just, just pound me. We just found me, Bob, come on.

Just flip me over. Put on the strap on.

That documentary about him was miserable.

Oh.

Made me so sad.

Why?

Because he got, they stole from him. They like tons of money from this. Like the people that kind of were his producers. I don't remember their names.

Oh, that's so fucking sad.

Yeah, they like all. But like left that guy with like, not in that, right? They were like, cuz there's no way that. What is it? It, what are their names? It was like a couple. Yeah. And they had, and they had his, and they had all his, um, you know, had the rights to all of his shit and all that stuff.

Well. Cause there's no way, there's no way that that's a character. So that makes me feel that was him because there's no way that he was like, paint a little. Couple mountains right here and then I'll finish up. We'll see you next week. Sesame Street's coming up next. PBS, the home of perfectly balanced shows. I hope that's what it stands for. I'll see you next week, everybody cut. Jesus fucking Christ. I have to shit like a fucking jewel, you know? And they're like, boy. Bob, cameras are still rolling, man. We're trying to get some b roll for the intro.

Will you stop? That's like that guy.

Fuck you, Andrew. By the way, your mom called last night.

Oh, wait, did she seriously?

Yeah, she asked me for a titty fuck.

Whoa.

I told her I'd paint one for instead.

Thank you, Bob.

I'm not into fat tits.

Have you seen the guy that does the Winnebago videos that loses his life? That guy's like one of the funniest characters. Have you seen this guy? Oh, look at Winnebago. The Winnebago guy, Andrew. He's like trying to sell Winnebagos.

Look at the smile on my face.

Fucking piece of shit. He loses his mind, dude. He's like. It doesn't even fucking work. He's like kicking the fucking. It's so funny.

It's so funny.

That is exactly the guy, though, who's like an infomercial guy who. Behind the scenes. But no, they say Bob Ross was that guy. He was. He was him.

What a bummer. Do.

He was him.

He was him.

He was him.

That's a guy with him. I'd watch a. You said there's a doc on him, on Bob Ross.

Yeah, I remember. Cameron. What?

I guess you couldn't do a biopic. It's not interesting enough, right? Or would it? I mean, unless there was.

What? On what?

Bob Ross?

No, they did kind of do a.

Biopic, not a dog.

What was it? Happy accidents. Betrayal and Greece.

Seeing that. But you need that. You know what I want to do is a doc like that, but a fake doc about Chef Boyardee because. And I actually made a fake poster for movie and was like, would you guys watch this? Oh, the engagement, the comments, the likes to where. And it was me in a full fucking Italian because I did this thing. My senior at USC, we had a dance class, right, that we had do. And we had to do a presentation for our final that was a movement. It was a movement class. And so I did this thing. It was no rules, open door policy. And so I came with this idea to do. I had all this voiceover and I had. It was like inner thoughts of chef Boyardee. I mean, come on. Smoke pot much in college?

Yeah.

And so I dressed up in fucking chef. I wake up and I just have a tape playing of, like. And there's like, soft piano music and hear rain and, like, every morning I wake up and look out the window dreaming of my next ravioli concoction. My wife is dead, my kids or whatever. And it was all singing. I look at the window, and it was just like a weird, like. But I was moving, but it was a lot of waking up, stretching. And then I would do, like, a weird dance across the floor to the kitchen. I go, oh, yes. And by the way, I danced to the fridge, and it was just like. And all my buddies in the class were laughing, movement teachers, like, effort and no, she gave me, like, at C and. But, but he is another guy that there is some greed and money and, like, family type of shit. And also in doing it, I looked up, I'm like, oh, there's enough about him out there about, you know, being this italian guy and getting in and then the creation of it, but so truly little info to where I'm like, oh, the creative freedom here is through the roof.

Yeah, you should do, you just gotta, you gotta be careful if it toes that line of like, well, Seinfeld just did. What was that called?

Pop tart. No, this would be a great unfrost.

Did you see that movie?

Yeah.

You afraid you could say it?

Yeah, it was.

Say it. Go ahead.

It was, it was entertaining, and I love that every moment was somebody that I really enjoy comedically.

Yeah.

Beck Bennett crushed. Tom Lennon was great. All the SNL guys for the snap, crackle, pop. Schumer was funny. Bill Burr was great, but it was just a little too campy for me. I guess that's it. And also I go, so I guess I would have loved a more Michael Keaton in the founder. Ooh, baby. If you're gonna do a movie about. And shout out to Rob Segel. Who wrote that? The guy who put me in Pam and Tommy and Chippendales. He nailed that. And I thought the tone of that was great. That's how I want to see a fast food or a snack movie. So that it would be more like that. Because then Mario Lopez did that, I think lifetime, the colonel for KFC movie.

No, I never saw that.

Me neither. But I saw a thing for it. I was like, oh, that's gonna be a real jokey type thing. Now, I would want this to be like a dark comedy, but funny still.

Shepherd, he went and murdered someone the night he actually.

Maybe, or maybe he saw his dad. Maybe. What's the movie? Is it. Analyze this. Wow. That. Right? I think that.

Analyze that. Yeah.

Where he sees. Right, his dad murdered in the restaurant. Isn't that De Niro. And that's why he needs therapy, I think. Billy Crystal. Yeah, I think. I'm not.

I don't remember.

So maybe it's like, maybe he saw that. Maybe he's older. Maybe his kid goes on a search to find him because he hears this, you know, maybe it's that.

Yeah, the lore of him. And yes, he's camped up somewhere in Italy.

Yeah, totally.

I like this. We'll write it.

All right.

Oh, I like that. Name a recipe for said Mario Lopez is the colonel, of all people, KFC or Popeyes? You're asking what I like better, KFC or Popeyes, bro?

Well, I mean, I've had more of KFC.

Why is that?

Why?

Cuz just, like, location wise.

Yeah, I. Yeah, and Popeyes. I just. Well, when I was. He had Popeyes more because what central.

What I like about Popeyes sure is it's always in a bad location.

Yeah.

And it's. And it's a little scary.

It's. They're usually.

Well, no, every time you go to Popeyes, you're always like, this feels unsafe. Yeah, the chicken is good.

There's a lot of viral fights.

The floor sticky or sticky? Yeah, there are a couple. Lights are always out there. It's never fully somebody's illuminated.

Yeah, potatoes are cold.

Freezing.

The gravy is not gravy.

No.

Hey, can I get some real gravy?

You ever like, we have shoe leather. You're like, well, let's put that. Yeah, warm that up. Put that.

Is that all you have? Yeah, but then there's the KFC is, I mean, wendy's just came out with a bucket of nuggets. You want to talk about?

Dude, a nugget bucket.

Careful.

Sorry.

There is no stopping America's fast food fatty ideas.

The greatest country in the world, dude, let's go.

Dude, we're just thinking. We're constantly sitting at home being like, could I suck that? Could I fuck that? Could I eat that?

Yeah. And it's usually the same thing.

Oh, dude, anytime I think like, oh, man, what a crazy notion. Or crazy thing. Like, just then I thought of like, a fat guy being so, so horny and so hungry, you know, that he gets a warm bucket of mashed potatoes from KFC and you know where I'm going to stay with me folks eats it, sticks his mouth in it after he fucks it. And then I'm like, no, there's probably the fact that with Onlyfans and even Craigslist misconnection, there's so many of these things where you're just like, wow, I didn't know that was happening.

Oh, yeah.

Now when I think of an idea like that, I'm like, oh, there's definitely a guy out there right now in.

Fucking some mashed potatoes in Lake Samaritan.

Washington. Duluth, Minnesota.

Definitely in Lakes Mamish. Yeah, definitely.

Duluth, Minnesota.

Duluth, Minnesota. There's a guy doing that right now.

Probably.

50. What's the highest denomination of nuggets that you can get from Chick fil a? Is it 50?

Those are good nuggets. The grilled chicken nuggets from Chick fil.

A. Chick fil a's number. What do you mean? What's nowhere near. They gotta have a 50. I mean, McDonald's has a 50 bucket nugget.

Do they really?

I know it for a fact they do. Because I've gotten it before for a party. Unless they don't do that anymore.

By the way, great.

On the menu. Go ahead and look at the McDonald's menu and tell me there's not a 50 bucket nugget on there somewhere. Hidden.

Speaking of the menu, did you watch the menu show?

No. You would love the menu show.

My God.

Watch menu. The menu move. The movie.

Oh, yeah. With Ralph finds. I'm sorry.

Oh, yeah. Okay. That's your. So you said tv shows, like.

Sorry, sorry. Thought. Yeah, it was movie, no, right?

Oh, such a good movie.

Yeah. Yeah.

Take me there. I don't want to die on that little island.

We are.

What is it, 40? Wow. Ten shy.

How much fat in the 50 nugget bucket from Wendy's?

Oh, my God. It's got to be so many.

Guess I'm gonna say like, like, grand. I'm a gay. I'm gonna gay. I'm gonna guess it's hun over 100.

Oh, my God. Yeah.

Isn't like four nuggets probably like ten? I don't know. It's gotta be nugget or one bucket.

One nugget has 15 grams. You. Yeah, that's one nugget.

Fuck, dude. Oh, God.

Let's go, dude. Let's go, USA. What are we waiting for, dude? Let's turn up.

What are we doing?

Let's eat it right now. That, you know, it's funny, though. And people can eat all that. Like, I see guys online, they can eat like, an unbelievable amount of food. And I don't think videos. I'll throw up. I'll puke everywhere. I see those guys. Have you seen that do that? There's a dude, I don't even know his name. But he eats. He does a fish tank filled with. Have you ever seen this? There's a guy on TikTok that does a fish tank filled with whatever they tell him to, and he'll eat the whole fish tank full.

So I filled up with Campbell's soup.

Everything, and he'll tell you how many gallons it is in the fish tank. Do fish, like, fish tank guy? It's unbelievable. But one time, this guy, so Looney. It was, um, like energy drink, like maybe Celsius, some like that. And he drank it with a fork. Someone's like, drink it with a fork. And that's how slow. And it's a time lapse.

Oh, my God.

And he does it. He drinks the whole thing with a fork. Do you see this guy's name? He drinks out of a fish tank. What's his name, by the way? I. That's what's gross about the Internet. This isn't good. I'm watching. I love it. It's not good for me to see this.

Good enough. You just spent five minutes. You're not getting that time back.

I don't care. I don't need it. Who cares? You know? I mean, yeah, I got enough time. I'm dying. I got enough time.

I once ate frosted flakes with a fork when I was post college. Just definitely cereal, really roughing it. Cereals was dinner. I remember eating a bowl of frosted flakes, sitting there. Just came back from an open mic. Bombed so hard.

Love those days.

And this was, by the way, I had waited at the comedy store for, like, 3 hours, and then I wasn't gonna told her I wasn't getting up. And I was just like, at least I'm playing wolverine tomorrow. And then tony was like, adam, somebody didn't show up. You can go up.

You can go up.

I'm not in my space for that at all. You got it. Go up there. Just bomb, didn't. It was everything I was thinking about doing, everything that I was sitting there going over my three minutes for 3 hours. Now it's just gone. So I get up there, I'm just, just bombed. And then Ryan O'Neal and Jeff Danis, who were hosting it, would always roast and toast. Sorry. Just roast and poke at any young open mic or that sucked. And, you know, and it hurt for a while, but then I remember the first time I got off, and they were like, Adam Ray, think he figured it out. And I was like, all right, that was cool. But, man, it hurt every time. I was just like, this is a negative place. Like, I know I bombed. Do you need to say it again for them? So I remember just bombing and them just being like, jesus fucking Christ. Like, not even trying to make a joke.

Danish and O'Neal.

Yeah. And sweet guys now. And, you know, as time gets older.

They got you good early.

Yeah, yeah. I mean, yeah, but, you know, maybe.

Better the intimidation back then.

And so I'm eating the frosted flakes home from that and you know the slogan for Frosted flakes? They're great. And in my head, not to be funny. I'm sad. I, like, heard that in my head and I kind of went, my roommate's like, what's so funny? I go, life.

He's like, no, that's frosted flakes life. We do have life.

Cereal? Yeah.

Listen, any more weed, man? Don't do that, dude. Just smoke me out, man.

I lived with a guy that worked at, at and t hated people, but was the top salesman. Go figure. And then a guy that was a sous chef at big restaurants downtown and was drunk all the time. Drunk all the time. So much so that he drove me in his truck to our landlord to resign for our lease. And he stumbles out the door and I go, whoop, you. Alright? And he goes, you're right. I was like, uber's not around yet. I get in the car, we drive down Melrose, you know, which is kind of a tight two lane on each side road.

Yeah.

If you're going Melrose from La Brea and Melrose, where we were passing paramount, and you're going down and it's. It's narrow. If you start speeding on the far right, dude, you're hugging that curb like a stepdad saying goodbye to his real kid. And we. He's going like 60. It's 30. And I go, whoa, whoa. I go, just slow down. He's like, I'm. And then we get in there and we sign the lease agreement myself. The other two guys, we hit four.

Or five cards and killed the whole family.

Ran through all the lights, but got there on time. And we get in there and we're signing the lease. And a guy, Gary Clef guy, looked like Professor X, but with maybe like, I don't know, maybe like a porn addiction. Glasses, bald head, talk like this. Hey, guys, by the way, you and I both are pretty good at emulating. This is spot on. Well, I'm so fired up. You guys are gonna stay in the building. This would be great. Bald glasses. Of course. We know month to month. We'll keep it going, if anything changes, call me. You know how available I am. I'm a fun guy, but I also like to keep it clean. Business is first, but fun is also a big part of my. No one asked about that. Gary, any other questions from here on out? And then Sean, blackout drunk. I'm like, no, thank you. Pretty standard, you guys. Whatever. Sean says name, won't say his last name. Sean raises hand. There is some $10 to Tevin, peppers to seven. Tevin Pebbitz doing ten to ten to seven, Tevin Pebbitz. And I go, I'll actually take this for. So now I just clock he's blackout.

So I'm like, I don't want him. I don't want to give up any reason for us to not be living here.

Yeah.

I was paying 640 a month from 2006 to 2014 when I lived there.

Wow.

In a three bedroom, two bath. And my room was. And then I moved into the bigger room with a bathroom that was 840.

Wow.

Yeah, not bad. On the bray and Melrose, man, that's pretty good. And so I'm like, don't fuck this up. She's like, Ted from Pevitz. And I go, I'll take this. Sean's asking is, we have a friend named Tevin Pevitz. He's an up and coming recording artist. Can he come by and play what's, I guess the noise ordinance, curfew for like, living in the apartment? Cause he's, we want to give him his, his flowers and he's a big Halloween party coming up. But Tevin Pebbit, you know, what's your, you know, and then Sean going, no. Oh, pets. What's the thing on pets? Can we have a cat? Can we have a dog? What is it? You know, and so I'll go, Kevin Peppitz has pets. And then he just kept like trying to, like, interject and then finally I just fucking kicked him under the table. And he looked at me goes. And I was just like, dude, like, you know, Vince Vaughn? And like fucking went and quit. Lock it up, dude.

Lock it up.

Lock it up. The fuck like you lock it up.

You lock it up.

My boss on the fucking table right now. What am I you want to talk about, by the way?

Did you let him drive home?

We'll be right back in here. We pour, whisk, whisk, whisk.

I like to go out, I like to have some meals. I like to have some fancy meals once in a while. And if you're a foodie, which most humans are, I think we need water, but we definitely need food too. I mean, it's the thing that I get the most excited about at night after shows. And, you know, it can be a little expensive going out to restaurants all the time. Well, that's why there's cook unity. Cook Unity is the first chef to use service, delivering locally sourced meals from award winning chefs right to your door every week and is cheaper than other delivery options. That's pretty impressive. All right. Sometimes I'll go to a restaurant out of town, and it is a big old bill, but, you know, kudos to the chef. You would love that at the comfort of your own home. There's no cooking required for a chef. Quality dining experience right at home. Unlike other meal services, Cook Unity is a chef collective bringing exciting culinary talent straight to your table. What else do you want? The chef is coming to you. Not literally, but figuratively. Cook Unity works with some of the best chefs in the country to bring creative, delicious meals to you every single week.

Every meal is handcrafted by chefs and made in local kitchens, not large production facilities, not those things you've seen on tv. It arrives fresh, never frozen, and you can keep it up in the fridge for seven days. Cook unity packaging is compostable, recyclable, and reusable. What's going on in here? How come you can't try this? I don't know what's getting in your way. Pick as few as four or as many as 16 meals per week. It's pretty fantastic. Also, what I love about it, they have vegan and paleo, pescatarian, gluten free. They have all these options for people, so it's not just limited. And they have the soy and dairy free options and nut free. Anything you need, they got it. You must, must try it if you want high quality food right at your door. From chefs, huh? Not a cook. A chef experience. Chef quality meals every week, delivered right to your door. Go to cookunity.com whiskey or enter code whiskey before check out for 50% off your first week. That is 50% off your first week by using code whiskey or going to cookunity.com whiskey.

Ginger.

I like gingers. So funny, dude. You're like, well, I was drunk, too. I mean, I wasn't as fucking as.

In, yeah, I did. Yeah, I did. I did. Let him drive me home. Jesus Christ. After all that wild dude one time.

I broke your door. Remember? That was that same.

That same guy? Yeah, same guy who he texted me. We did. After our Christmas drinking video, which you can find on we got so tanked.

And then we were. You locked.

We locked ourselves up. We got. So we drank, I think, three bottles of wine and smoked three blunts and recorded, I think it's called a drunk Christmas album on YouTube. Very sloppy Christmas. It's one of the funniest things. People don't think we're really drunk, which.

Is a bummer case. We were gone and it was busted your face open.

I fell into a cymbal and sliced my open.

And you knocked over a cymbal. Your head hit the edge of the. Of the snare drum.

That's right.

Yeah. The cymbal fell with you, but your head hit the snare drum because it was a blunt smack. Yeah, it was loud.

And you just kept singing, most wonderful.

Time of the year.

And then I get up.

I didn't realize you were hurt. I just thought you fell. I didn't. I didn't see you. I thought, oh, he just lumped down on the ground. And then you got up. I was like, whoa, dude.

And then at the end, the ending is the best part. Well, one of the. It's all really funny. And we had a great time, though.

So much fun.

And then at the end, I'm just bleeding and you're like, so funny, wolverine. And then you go. You go. And I go, oh, okay. And then go to the hospital. You go, no, you're okay, dude. You go, super funny, dude.

It was so funny.

And then we go home to my place because we're like, now we want to fucking smash food and.

Yeah, stoned again. And talk also. And we didn't drive.

No, no.

Your buddy drove us.

My other roommate.

Yeah, your other roommate drove us.

And so bros home. And we had a good time, but the door was locked, so. So Andrew's like, fuck. It was one of those things where you're like, doors locked. We want to get in. We know fun is just on the other side of this fucking handle. And Andrew Van dams my door down. He was just like, whoa.

Even. I can't believe it worked. Do you know you did something? And you're like, in your mind, your drunk mind, you're like, it's gonna work perfect. And then you do it. And I clearly would never work like that. When I did that, I thought, whoa, you can do that. I thought that was just a movie.

In the movie thing. Yeah, you busted the door. And by the way, you know, what does that say about how protective our doors were? But you gave it a good kick, though.

But it wasn't that hard. I mean, it was just a kick.

It should have given a little resistance, but it just was like, yeah, come on in. Yeah, your roommate was bummed. And then I think, yeah, the guy who drove me drunk the next day was like, came back and was like, what happened to the door? And I was like, oh, we got it. We couldn't get in.

We fucking, we had an interesting locksmith stopped by.

Yeah. But then literally two weeks later, my roommate got into a debacle with a pizza delivery guy because he showed up with the pizza. And he. What happened again? The guy showed up with the pizza, and the car had slipped around a bunch, so all the slices was just looked.

It had been smashed up against the side as if you held it vertically or something. The pizza was smushed in sideways on the thing.

Yeah. Oh, yeah. And this one is. So then my roommate goes, I'm not paying for this shit.

Yeah.

And he was just like, the fuck you aren't. And he was like, I'm not. And he fucking threw the pizza at the pizza delivery guy and slammed the door at his face. So the pizza delivery guy pulls an Andrew Santino and fucking kicks the door and breaks the door handle.

Perfect.

And so then we get a text, my other roommate, and I get a text from him being like, hey, just a heads up. Got in a fight with the pizza dude for guy. He broke the door handle. When you guys come on.

Like, dude, I think we need to fix the door. The door frame, the handle, the lock.

They actually need to move.

The good days, baby.

The best days.

The good days. Adam, I love you.

That a bit. It. This is a good one.

Yeah.

This is so guy wet city today.

This is so good.

Cool.

Yeah. I was redirected to.

To a foreign Denny's.

That's so awesome.

Wow.

Google what gt.

I now have Adam raycomme.com, where you can find all my tour dates, which, by the way, on the road from here until November, doctor Phil live theater dates will be announced very soon.

How fun.

If you want to watch, all the Doctor Phil lives are on YouTube on Adam Ray comedy. It's my YouTube channel special is out now on my YouTube. Like and subscribe. I'm proud of it. It's fun. It looks great. It's funny. It's a good. It'll make you laugh. It'll make you feel good. And the podcast about last night. And I'm in a Paul Feig movie coming up in July with Cena. With boy Cena.

How many have you done? Four with him?

Oh, maybe like six or seven. Jesus with your boy. Cena's in. It's called jackpot. And then I'll be on impractical jokers in July, but come out and see me on the road. Adamraycommie.com.

Go see the boy, man. One of my oldest boys on planet Earth, one of my oldest friends, one of my sweetest little princes. And.

And I love you. And what I love about knowing you this long has been the commitment to excellence. Because a lot of people will come up in this business and go, all right, I have a funny idea, but how do I implement it? Do I go to the laugh factory? Do I scream the n word? Or do I just sit at home and write and let things marinate? And yeah, I can wear cool shoes and drive a fancy car, but do I have substance inside of me? Could I put my finger in my butt? Sure. Could I put a thumb in someone else's butt? Maybe? Do I say my own name when I come? I have to, because it's the only way to get fired up about a Wednesday. I digress. I think if you think you can, you can't. And if a 24 hours fitness closes at eleven, well, you have the grounds to burn it down. We'll be right back. In here we pour. Wisp, wisp, wisp, wisp, wisp. You were that creature in the ginger beer. Sturdy and ginger like vampires. The ginger gene is a curse. Gingers are beautiful. You owe me $5 for the whiskey.

$75 for the horn.

Gingers are hell, no, this whiskey is excellent ginger.

I like gingers.