What up, Wiskjian Diger fans. Welcome back to The Show. Man, I am on the road. Come and see me right now. This very weekend, I'm in Houston, Texas, ladies and gentlemen. And then I go to Tampa, Florida. I'm doing Nashville, Dallas, Phoenix, San Francisco. Come out and see your boy. Go to AndrewSantino. Com for those tickets. Andrewsantino. Com. We added dates in Dallas, and we added in San Francisco. Get those right now at AndrewSantino. Com before they sell out. Let's go to the episode.

In here, we pour a whisk, whisk, whisk, whisk, whisk Ginger's a beautiful. You owe me $5 for the whiskey, $75 for the horse.

Ginger's, oh, hell no. This whiskey is excellent.

Ginger. I like ginger's. Okay. How are you, buddy?

I'm going to grab that mic and pull it towards your beautiful face. I don't want to get it.

Okay, good?

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to Whisky Ginger. My guest today is one of my favorite people on Earth. I say that for all my guests, but I mean it once again today. It's Dave Vatel.

Thanks for having me, everyone. It's great to be on the... What would be the name here that you guys go by?

Whisky Ginger.

Whisky Ginger. Yeah. How does it feel? I was just on Sierra Bravo Tango. Okay. From First of all, the one thing we can agree on, the weather has changed. And I'm talking not just physically, be emotionally. And you seem like early when I was pulling up, you were a little nervous. Now I see a smile on your face. Yeah.

Well, you make me smile. What changed, buddy? Honestly, it was I wanted to... Once I sit down with somebody, I feel much more comfortable than when we're standing up because I'm 6'1 and you are...

In the fives.

Yeah. So I like to be... Same height makes me feel a little bit better. When we're seated, it It makes me feel a little bit more equal, even though I'm not your equal. But in this world, it feels better.

Well, I don't know if that was a compliment or just demeaning. It was both. Anyway, I'm glad a tall man can sit down with a short man in these times.

Well, especially what's going on right now. People are letting their kids choose their height these days. Are they? Yeah, that's the big thing.

I didn't get that letter. You mean you could be taller if you want to?

Yeah. I mean, these hardcore libs are out there, and they're letting their kids choose how tall they want to be. And they let them pick their eye color in this day and age. I mean, it's gotten way, way out of control.

Well, you know what?

And they want to take our thumbs away. I don't know if you know that, but they want us- One at a time.

Easy, buddy.

Sorry, sorry, sorry.

Wow. First of all, the tall thing. As a short man, we always wish we were taller, but then I'm thinking, would I be the same man?

Probably not. No.

I wouldn't probably have to have done all my short man stuff.

Now, you did a whole special of short stuff? What was it called?

No, I never did a special of short man stuff. That was squat. Because I'm also squat. We used to call it Big Shouldered, but it's really just fat. We'll be right back. So Whisky Ginger. Yes. And is that a given name or is it just a nickname?

It was my mother's maiden name. Yeah, Ginger was my mother's maiden name. I love it.

In Shytown, correct?

Chicago, Illinois. Yeah.

Do you miss it?

Honestly, I I do. I don't miss the murders, but I do miss the food.

Usually, towns with the best crime have the best food. By far.

I don't know if Detroit holds that.

That pizza.

The pizza is good, but is it? I feel like I've also been convinced that it's good. I've convinced myself that it's good.

I like it. And I'm from New York. We're a pizza town.

How do you feel about Connecticut pizza people saying that that's better than New York?

You know what? I don't know who makes it up there. I guess someone's Butler. I mean, it's Connecticut. I'm sure it's fine. Let's face it, it's hard to mess up pizza. I was just in San Diego, and let me tell you something, a border town is the way to go as well. The fusion food. Are you into fusion?

The thing I love the most about Southern California, I like Mexican, Mexican food. Yes. I like real made by Mexicans, not really for us, but they'll put up with you. I really like that.

That's also how I like my cars. That's That's great, dude, because you go down there and it's a fun town. You guys were playing, right? You're on tour?

Yeah, me and Bob did. We played San Diego. We played San Diego State. Is that where we played? Really? A college? We played the Ampitheater outside. Oh. Which I don't know why we said yes to that, but we thought it was cool. And Bobby's from San Diego. I didn't know that. It was like a homecoming.

I've known the guy for years. I didn't know that.

Well, originally, his family's from Korea, and they escaped.

Wow.

Yeah, they escaped.

Sounds like a movie of the week to me. It is.

And But check out this clip from that movie of the Week, From Korea to San Diego.

Bonsang Toyoton, Teto.

So that was something.

Nice throw. Yeah. So let me ask you a question. Yeah. Okay. Here we are, just three guys in a Room. And would you say the goal of this podcast is to one day have a bathroom in your actual location?

If we work hard enough, I feel like we could get to that point.

That's a good goal. When you hit that, the sky's the limit.

But I'll tell you why we like the bathroom outside of this location. Go. Because people sometimes don't want to be heard or seen going in and out, and I don't really judge their time.

But maybe that's one of your pranks.

Oh, that's our bit that we're doing. I bet it is. Wait, look under your seat. Wait till you see what's underneath there.

I'm afraid to. Dave, before- Let me ask you, would you guys consider yourself practical jokers? Where it actually is helpful?

Yeah. I mean, all the bits that we're doing, we're trying to really get people to the next stage of their life. We do this big prank on the show. We'll go to a drive-through, and we'll buy everyone's food until we run out of money. I love that. Just to fuck with them.

That's a great thing. We need more of that in this country.

And these idiots, they drive away confused.

You should do that at a hospital. You just pick up people's bills. That would be great.

No, I don't want to... I actually just got a hospital bill today for $1,700, and it said insurance paid $165.

Isn't it amazing?

It was very nice of them to pick up $165.

Yeah, that's like basically the gauze. Yeah, a wrap. Well, I hope you're feeling okay. You look good.

Do I? You look better than I do. Last night, I saw you on stage and you had your sling backpack on. Yes. And I thought, Is he going to take it off? No. And I knew the answer was no. But I wanted you to throw me for a loop, take it off and put it back on during the set.

I take it off, and immediately I open it up and bang. It's juggling. That's a juggler bag, people. The traveling juggler, no one really knows the lifestyle. Yeah.

Well, they're hard to pin down.

Let's talk some road stuff. I just was at the Comedy Store, and I just found out they have a laundry there. And here I am doing laundermats every time I'm in town. I would love to do that. You go do a set, you do your laundry, you come back out, you put it in the dryer, you do roast battle, you come back out, you fold, you're done. How great is that?

We did a couple of venues of theater shows, and they have laundries. But the wildest shit was they charge.

Yeah. Oh, in the theater? Oh, now we're talking. I don't know how you guys put up with it. First of all, they lop off 30% right at the top. Forget about that money. And then every little thing, the green room, there's stuff in there you didn't even want, but you're going to pay for it. Yeah. Do you need 18 types of tea? Well, that's what they got There's somebody in there. Flowers. Who wanted that? I didn't put that on my writer. Then there's somebody in there. You got to tip them out, and I do. I don't even know who they are. Somebody's friend. They're just in there. Then merch. You guys do merch, right? We do.

Yeah, we get killed on merch.

Then the venue wants a piece of that. Wow. What a clip joint.

When we sell a shirt in a theater, I think we walk away. We did the math with 18% of the total. Crazy. That's what we make. When we sell shirts, it's basically just for the fans to have something.

Yeah, you're being a good guy.

It's like, Hey, here's something for fun. We've lost money on it.

I totally know what you're talking about. It sucks. But they always get the person to sell the merch at the theater. They're like some just weird character. A lot of things have to go wrong in your life to sell merch for someone you don't know at a theater.

Well, what did we have? We had a dude on the soundboard. What city were we? Pittsburgh or something like that? We had a guy that was notting off. He was on the soundboard? Yeah.

And he was nodding off. He was on the soundboard?

Yeah, and he was nodding off. I He was nodding off, not taking a nap. He was on the horse.

Wow. You could smell it?

Oh, you could feel it. And when he woke up and we'd say, our tour manager was like, our production coordinator was like, Hey, dude, you're missing all the cues. And he kept going, Okay, okay, Okay. And then seconds later would be nodding off again.

That's right. Because you guys have like, you need stuff to pump in, right?

Yeah. When you and Jeff did Bumping Mikes, did you guys have more show to it, or was it just you do a set, he does a set, and then you come out together. Is that it?

That's originally how it started, just in clubs. But eventually, we just went on together. And then we did three episodes for Netflix, and that was a lot of fun. It was also a lot of work. And I think that the beauty of that was not just the anything could happenness to it, but it was also me and Jeff together. Once we get in the rhythm, it's so much fun. But it's also everything goes. And when we do gigs, we used to go on and do theaters as well. We go right into the crowd. We talk to people in the crowd. We do all that stuff because there's no one better at that than Jeff. I mean, he's the rosemaster. It could be you. No, I think Jeff is really the gold standard of that stuff. And it's his thing. We go and throw our bits out there and bicker back and forth and all that stuff. And the fans really seem to like that. And that's the thing I think that you do when you're on tour as well, it's like every show is different, even though it's the same.

Yeah, exactly. We're following some of the same beats. But the beauty is sometimes you hit home runs. Sometimes there's stuff that you just cannot... When we pull from the crowd and there's always at least one or two people who are... It's like a gift from the Comedy gods. You're like, Who arranged this? I know exactly what you're talking about. It's fucking wild when people say- Culturally, the pointing, please. Sorry.

It's okay. As long as there's 50 bottles of booze in the room. Yeah. Okay.

We always get someone that goes, This is a plant. That guy was a plant. We get asked that all the time. No, we didn't fucking pay someone to come to Tulsa to do a bit.

It's whatever comes in. I think that's what also for me keeps me thinking. When I'm with Jeff, I got to be listening and thinking. And that's the thing that people don't realize. It's like a lot of listening when you got another person on stage. When you and Bobby up there, you got to listen and make sure you're waiting. It's almost like waiting for your wave. Okay, now.

He doesn't do that, but yes, I do. But yes, I will. But you. I know.

You're right.

The fans want to know this question more than anything.

And how many fans are we talking about? Thirty-six.

Wow. Each one of the chambers from Wutang. We did it.

Turn on the other camera.

No, we can't afford it. Okay, go ahead. Once we get the bathroom inside, we'll have all three working.

Let's hear it.

The fans. They want to know because I shot a movie in Australia. Jeff was in it.

Hold on a second. Really? I've been waiting for something exciting to take this off. Sorry about that.

What was it called? Ricky's to Nicki. It'll come out in a month. Ricky Steenicke. It'll be out by the time this is out.

I know it by the other name, not on my back. I'm not done. Go ahead.

Well, Jeff was down there- That's great.

Congratulations. Thank you.

But Jeff was in the movie with us, but he made us all, and this is something I want to know about your tour with him, he would make us bathe him before show. We had to bathe him before the show. Did you have to do that?

No, but Jeff is a lot of work. He really does, from the sound check to whatever. Then with me and him, it's really like we're old men, so it's like trying to find a place to eat. So that's really our big excitement of the night, but no bathing. I would say the one thing that's cool about Jeff is that he knows how he wants it. See, for me, I'm always like, I don't care, but he knows exactly how he wants it. Tell me, this is your movie, right?

No, it's not my movie. It's John Seena and Zack Efron's movie, and me and Jeff are just in it.

How was it being in Australia? For how long were you down there?

I was down there for two and a half months or something like that.

Wow, that is a A lot of time.

Yeah, but have you ever toured down there?

Never. Why? The flight is too long. Yeah, but you can stop. Is that what you did?

No, but a lot of people did. You can stop in Hawaii or you can stop in the French Polynesia. You can stop.

That's what I wanted to do. Take a vacation. Because I used to do a lot of USO is stop along the way, go to Korea, work my way down through Vietnam. Philippines. The Philippines, hit all the hotspots and then go to Australia. But now my mom has dementia. I can't leave the country.

She won't know.

I know she won't, but I will. And it's just tough getting back in the country sometimes. I mean, I have that problem. I don't know about you guys.

What did you have charges?

No, nothing like that. It's just like if I had to get home really quickly, it would be having to go through. You know what I'm talking about. I got you. But congratulations on the movie.

Thank you. Well, I hope people liked it. It's out right now.

Two and a half months.

Yeah. Wow. It was a long time.

Did you do stand up while you're down there?

I did. I did a couple of shows. We shot in Melbourne, which I highly recommend when you do go down there because you will.

I've heard only good things.

It's the fucking best. The food, the culture. Melbourne feels like if you took a little piece of every Asian country and threw it in this weird, beautiful, weirdly laid out city along the river, and it was every food you've ever thought of. And then also rad shit going on. A lot of good bands go down there. I think it's got a vibrancy to it. No offense to Sydney. I like Sydney. Sydney feels like Toronto. You've seen it before.

Which is the city when they do the New Year's? Which one has all the fireworks? Is that Sydney?

That's Sydney, yeah. Okay. Over the Bridge and all that stuff.

Yeah. So Melbourne is the way to go.

Melbourne, to me, it's like the little sweet nook And did they put you up an apartment or how did they do that? Well, the famous guys got houses. I lived in a hotel. I just lived in a regular little tiny hotel, which was- For like two and a half months? Yeah.

There we go back to this laundry thing. It's really difficult. It was hard. In another country, I can only imagine. Well, they even call it laundry there.

They're small. No, they don't. They call it wash.

Yeah. So you're like, I got to do me wash.

I got to wash me.

I got to wash me.

And they don't know if you're talking about yourself or your clothes.

This is the second time you brought up this bathing thing. Now, let me ask you something. I'm a shower man. Does that mean I should leave? Because you seem like a bathtub guy.

I don't want you to leave because we got some time left on the show, but I am a tub man.

You're a tub man. How about yourself?

He's a tub boy. When he grows up, he will be a tub man.

I see him as a barrel of rainwater. Yes. Finally, I got you laughing.

No, no.

There you go. There's nothing better after a long drive.

Can I suck your dick real quick?

Can I talk?

No.

Go ahead, buddy.

I've been such a fucking fan of yours for so long. I belong from afar. You don't really know me.

But now you're from a close. Well, not really. And we're both colleagues. I mean, we're all in the same game.

No, no.

Go ahead.

And I'm going to do it. I know it makes you uncomfortable. I don't care.

I don't have a movie in Australia. Here I am waiting for a call back in New Zealand.

You're the greatest living comedian alive right now.

I don't think that at all.

I say that. No, it's my opinion.

I'm a club comic. That's what I do. I know a lot of great comics, and to be a part of it is all I ask. I do it for the fans. It's also great to meet the new comics. The young bloods. Like you guys, I feel for you in a way because it's such a different game. It's such a harder game. There's more stakes to it now. And as we all know, we live in a very judgmental culture. So the whole idea of just doing a, I don't even know if we're allowed to curse on your podcast.

You can say whatever What do you want.

Do a what the heck joke, just something you felt from the heart, and then it comes back on you. I feel for you guys.

But I think culturally, people are... I think people don't give a shit anymore. I really don't. I think it's starting to come to a place where there is a lot of scrutiny over comedy and what you say. And then now people are realizing that there's way worse shit going on in the world. It's not that big of a deal.

I concur. But what about when you were in Australia, did you I noticed, are they- Those crowds were amazing. Are they sensitive or we don't care?

No, they were so fucking fun. Oh, that's great. They were so fun. That's good to see. I mean, the first half of the show that I was doing down there because I had not had time to work out. So I maybe had 30 minutes to give them, 25 minutes, truly not one of these when you're like, I have 40. I was 25. And the rest of the time I told them I was just doing stuff about my experience there, and I was shitting on them. And they were so gleeful about it. Yeah, they loved how free free and fun. And there wasn't a moment of, I didn't get any of that stuff.

I heard that they were very sports oriented. Is that true?

They're very like Aussie rules football. They're very into that. Have you ever seen this thing? It's massive. It's like rugby meets football meets soccer meets.

I didn't know that. I thought it was just rugby and then this other thing.

There's a gang bang at the end.

There is.

Yeah, that's who wins.

No offense, but like two and a half months down there, you're giving up stage time in the stage. You're giving up gigs and stuff like that. So I hope they compensate you for that.

Not really, if I'm being honest.

See, that's the worst. No one knows that about the movie industry.

There's not a lot of money.

There's not much money in it. You got to get to the level of like...

John cena, who was in it with me.

Like that guy gets- I'm sure he was making some money.

He gets all the money, and then I got... But I think they still do that. And this is interesting. I do want to know about this. The comedy career that you've had is like, nowadays, they tease you with the future. Netflix goes, If you do this, you might get- Yeah, I don't fall for any of that.

But yes, I understand.

But what I'm saying is your generation- The bait and switch. You guys were the ones to crack the code on bait and switch and figure out what was bullshit and not.

We didn't have as many other options. There was no YouTube or anything like that. I mean, it was basically Comedy Central. I really don't even know there was an alternative to platform television, that thing. But I would say that with YouTube and all these other ways of just, I guess, even TikTok and stuff like that, you can get the jokes out there. And the smart ones, the crafty ones, have learned already how to game it and turn it into ticket sales. And that's really what it's about. So the next time you go to Australia, which is good because you'll be able to set up a tour, you already have a fan base established. So that was a smart move that you did.

I was trying, and then I tried to feel it on. Then me and Bobby and I are going to go to a tour in Australia and do eight cities, or I don't even know what it is, but we're going to be bouncing around. So I'm excited to really try it that way versus me working and then going and working and going. And yeah, they rob you. They do rob you when you're young, but it's the hope of maybe you get something more out of it in the long run.

I don't know. It's exhausting. The travel is exhausting. And the worst part that could happen would be you go down there for that movie, right? And then they go, You know what? I'm sorry, it's not working out. Then you have to fly all the way home. That would suck.

No one got kicked off of the film that was foreign, that was an American. But I do know there was a few people that I don't think worked out. Oh, really? Well, Locals, it's a little bit It's easier for them to be like, I think we're not going to have it.

Aren't they really good actors? Most of their people are here. I guess the best ones are here. Some of them are.

But the trouble is, hiding the accent is tough for some of them. Really? When they do an American accent because they all had to do an American accent, they think that we always When they say dude, they're always like, Oh, all right, dude. I was like, I think they think we always... It's like, we don't... Our emulation of them would be like, good day, mate. It's like if we said that every six words, it was like, let's go down there I'm going to hang out.

Good eye, mate.

And they'd throw it in unnecessarily all the time.

Wow. Dude, dude, dude.

Why did they pick there to shoot it? It was just money-wise? Of course. Yeah. Because they had nothing to do with they're all in Australia.

No. Saving the money that they didn't pay us.

Maybe it was also because of what was going on here with strikes and stuff.

No. I mean, this happened January. I just think they saved a lot of money.

Well, now you're in the Union. Yeah. God bless. So there you go.

In the Union.

And I think that's a great start, right? You want to do acting, right?

I've done a little bit of it, but this is the biggest thing I've done yet for sure.

I'm not much of an actor. I don't like learning lines. I'm not good at learning the lines. Most of the stuff I've done have been for people who know me, like Amy Schumer, she's so cool to me. Louis. Louis. And what's his name? There's a couple of people that I've worked with. I was in Pete show, Michael Che show. But they're mostly comics, so they know what I do, and they just go This is what you got to say. Now you say it the way you want to say it. And I think that's the best way to work with comics. But I know there's some comics that are really good actors where they can do all the emoting and the emotion and all that stuff. A few of us. But I'm not into that.

No, it's not for everybody. I want to ask, how long have you been sober? What's that? How long have you been sober?

Decades now.

Do you keep tabs or no? Do you keep tabs on how long?

No, but I make sure every podcast I do, there's at least 25 bottles of whiskey here. Well, we brought that in. I mean, are you guys bros? Is that what we're doing here? Is this a man show, Life Raft?

Is that what's happening here? We bring this in to intimidate you.

Are we going to punch each other's arms?

What are we going to do here? We might tug on each other's dicks a little bit.

Whoa, look at this guy, Captain Filthy over here.

That's what real bros do, Dave.

Nice.

No, I like whiskey. I enjoy it. You do?

I used to drink whiskey myself.

But you had to stop?

Yeah, I had to stop. I was shitting blood. The color of your hair. Yeah. There you go.

This was your shot.

Yeah. We'll right back again. In here, we pour whiskey.

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Ginger. I like ginger. How's that whiskey going? It's okay. Remember, you can't drink yourself into having a father.

Yeah, that's actually true, isn't it? Well, he won't come back, will he?

That's the name of our book. You cannot. So you drink whiskey. How about weed? That's a big thing out here. You got that weed. I don't really smoke weed.

Did you ever smoke weed? It was never.

It was always like, no. That was not my thing. I like cigarettes and I like coffee, and both of those are bad for you, too. But the whiskey, I like Jamieson whiskey. That was your favorite. I loved it. I loved it. I would drink it with beers. I can't tell you politically which beer it was, but I drank with beer.

Sounds like Perroni to me.

And then I tried to class it up with vodka sodas because those were supposed to be good for you. But that really is a little too classy for me. Who always has enough lime for that? You know what I'm saying?

No, there's not enough limes in the world.

What's your other drink? What's your fun? Whisky is your looking out a window alone. What happened? Typing.

Yeah, I'm always typing.

What's your other drink? Nothing.

I'm not a big beer guy. I don't know. Whisky is my thing, but I've put away most other party fun, go out, drink. I like to have a glass once in a while with a friend. I don't really drink as much anymore. That's not bad. No.

How about a cigar?

I like a cigar. Bobby Kelly was out here.

Is he a cigar He's a big cigar guy. He didn't know that. Yeah. Has he been on the cover of Cigar magazine?

Cigargirl. He's on Cigargirl this next month. Yeah.

I thought that show was canceled.

You should see where he hides the cigars. That's the whole joke.

Where does he?

You'll figure it out right on this episode of Cigargirl. Check this clip out. Nice save. He's a big cigar guy. I smoked for a little while and then quit, and then I sneak him sometimes. But cigars make me want a cigarette, so I try to get away from it.

Well, I think that's great that you're able to have a pop and then say, Hey, that's enough. That's the way to do it. And also the cigars. My dad used to smoke the cigar, so that's why I went to cigarettes, despite him. There you go.

And who's winning now.

Yeah, exactly.

I don't know. No, we're not really. I wouldn't say it's a bro show. I do like a little bit of whiskey, but I do think- So what's all the booze here then? Well, this is from sponsors and friends and-How great is that? Yeah, people just send it. Now, usually, most of my friends now are sober in comedy. But if I have guests that aren't sober, I send them home with a gift and they can take something. That's nice.

But yeah, I guess you were born too late because back in the day, yeah, it was more of a party, I think. I think the pot thing is still happening hardcore.

A lot of people are doing edibles now.

Yeah, I missed all that. What do you think of that?

I have no interest in getting that high. It's the overthinking high, where you get to the place where you're questioning everything in your entire life. I don't need to have a philosophical nightmare while I'm trying to just enjoy a shitty TV show.

Correct.

What's your guilty pleasure TV show, Dave? What's embarrassing?

I have a few of them that I really enjoy. I'm probably not the only one out there, but my 600-pound life. I know this is considered, I guess you could say ham now, but I really do enjoy an episode of that or two. Sometimes they have a marathon. All I'm going to say is these people are heroes. We just have to get them down a way where they can fly. That's really what it is.

Have you seen Thousand Pound Sisters?

No, I didn't see that.

You got to elevate your game of Fat People TV.

I like that. Then let's see what other guilty pleasure shows I have. I watched Naked and Afraid still, even though that is now considered old. I know that they have added just the... Because as you can tell, I dress for prepping, so I'm always into that stuff.

Yeah, you I feel like you might be dropped in the woods at any moment.

Anything can happen. Have you been kidnapped before? Kidnapped? No. I look like I'm on the other team. But I assume a young guy like yourself, especially in Australia, were you worried? Did they give you some like, if things go bad, this is what you should do?

I was unfortunately placed into a human trafficking circle for a while. Is that true? I was used. This is true now. About a week and a half. Yeah, I was used.

This is true, yes or no? No. Okay, so why would you joke about that? I got to say one thing that going out of the country, I've been in a country for so long, but the countries I went to were the Middle East and things like that for the USO. So you would just basically do what He told you, go where you're supposed to. But the whole idea of wandering around Afghanistan, that wasn't really- We're going to go to Abu Dhabi in May. That's a great place. You've done it? Yeah.

We're going to Abu Dhabi.

Sex in the City didn't do it justice.

Yeah, they didn't. What was she What are you thinking?

I don't know. I mean, they only showed the one side of it, not the gritty. But that'll be great. And I'm sure they're going to love him over there.

Yeah, we're going to have fun. Although they did give us a preface that Bobby's not allowed to show any- Skin? Any skin. He can't show his wiener or his butt hole, which are two of his favorite things. Oh, wow.

That's true. He takes his stuff off. He's still doing that, huh?

And he puts his wiener in his butt hole now. That's the new thing. That's his news. Good for Bobby. He's got a new five on it.

I know he was working on that back in the day. I love Bobby. I was going to say when we were all together, but Every time I meet Bobby, he's always like we were talking about, he's a great headliner, whether he thinks so or not. He is great. And just watching him, I'd say, the crowd comes alive. Not everybody can do that. So Bobby believes believe in yourself. That's what I'm saying.

This is not going to help him at all.

And you also do together. It's not easy. When super fans come to see you, you want to work on material, it's tough, right? It's so hard. It's tough. And I know that myself, that when people come down for one thing and you to go, Hey, tonight I'm working on this thing, and you look at their faces like, Where's the joke I want to hear?

You're like, I'll get to it. Just let me try to get through this fucking thing, too.

But fight the good fight. Keep doing it.

We're going to. I want to tell the fans before we go any further. We're getting married, you and I. Everyone's invited. Dave's putting out a special on Netflix, and it's called?

Hot Cross Bonds.

Hot Cross Bonds.

Yeah, and it's 37 minutes long. I wanted to go for short, Santee. Why is I feel like people don't have the attention span. I agree. I watched a bunch. Netflix had a couple that were 30 minutes in that range, and I was like, This is my scene. I want to do that. I want to do it short, just get to it, get to the jokes, do my thing. I also have trouble watching specials, and I'm a comic. So when I look at them, I look at all the production and all that stuff, too. But the whole idea of sitting for a whole hour, you pause, you go make a sandwich, you do all these different things. So it takes you two days to watch a special.

Netflix came out with a thing that they send you. I did a special on Netflix last year, and they send you this breakdown of who started it, who stopped it, who went back to it.

That's great.

Yeah. But it's interesting to watch. It goes along with what you're saying. So many people get around to finishing it, but not one sitting is so tough.

Yeah. People just don't have that attention span. People have shit going on. And that's so cool, man. I'm sorry I haven't seen this special. No, no, no. Were you happy with it?

No, but I mean, that's- That means you're a really good comic. Yeah, I couldn't stand it. I hate it.

I don't know anybody goes like, Yeah, I nailed it. It's like, usually like, I know myself. I'm second-guessing every joke, and I'm like, I wish I could redo that joke now. So you feel that the same way?

Yeah. I mean, you're a significantly better comic. Half of it is what I love, and half of it, I just was like, Man, I don't know if I should have... I don't know. It's just pieces of it. I was annoyed that I didn't do the way I wanted it to do it or prep it out the way I should have prepped it out. I don't know. The next time I go out- I have the same thought of there was a lot of bits that I thought were finished that I realized now weren't.

I wish I had that premise back that I could add more to it.

You want to be able to edit it so bad and go back in time.

Well, the guy I did with who's done a bunch of stuff with me, Scott Gallek, is great. He really put up with a lot of my indecision. We had some little technical, some technical problems, stuff like that. But I also was spoiled because I remember doing other ones where I had four shows to choose from. This time I only had two. When there's little problems on one, then you really only have one and a half. But that's cool. So now, do you feel like... How close are you to the next one? Do you feel that pressure?

Yeah, I mean, not really. Because it feels like they are waiting on you to tell them that you'd like to do something else. I don't have a gun to my head. We're like, You should do it again. It's like, I don't think anybody gives a fuck about Timeline anymore. Your last special was how many years ago?

I think it was before you were born. Yeah.

A road work. 80? 1979? No, 2014. 2014.

What a year it was.

What was going on in 2014?

Well, I was heading to a lab in Wuhan. What was there? No, I was... What you would call it? I just wanted to do one, but I wanted to do it where I bounced around to a bunch of places. And part of that was because I was like, no one's done this. And I wanted to give cameras to the audience, I think Radiohead did that or something. But I wanted to give the audience perspective of the show. But I wanted to bounce around from different places, which was cool because in a way, it was great to have that many choices, but it was bad in terms of having enough material for each one and then going to the next one because it was on Comedy Central, so you had commercials. If it was different where there was no commercials, then it would have been easier to just go to the next one. Also, I think a lot of us overthink the special because we're like, This is it. It's got to get it right, and the jokes. But at At the end of the day, what you're really doing is, I'll put it nicely, think of the jokes as a beloved dog.

It's time to put your best friend to sleep. You're going to pet him, you're going to lavish him with treats, and then you put him down. That's how I feel about these jokes. Man, I love these jokes. Now I can barely stand them. I'm done with them, and now you got to put them down. I will end up doing them again down the road, here and there, but never in groups and bunches like I did on the special.

This is a very stupid question, but is there one joke that still to this day from your past that you love, that you never really got tired of, that you're like, it just...

I have a couple of go-tos that are from the beginning, but In my experience, I have fans that are way old and they know all my stuff. So they'll bring up jokes to me that I don't even remember that I did, and they're all inappropriate. And I'm like, Who said this? Really? Oh, that was me. Oh, my album? I don't remember that, dude. Listen, that was a dick. So you're immediately apologizing. They're like, No, that joke helped us get through a really tough time. My mother was sick and we used to listen to your album. I'm like, Really? So evidently, we are doing some good in the world. We're not, let's face it, people out there get no attention in doing amazing things. But the fact that people do use comedy sometimes to help them get through tough times, I guess that's what we could say is like, All right, that's worth it. In here, we pour whiskey.

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I like chaners.

I do love it when people come up to us. We have people that say, My dad is dying. I'm going through a divorce. My life is fucking shit. Can I get a free T-shirt? Yes. Can I get a free shirt? And I say, yeah, we're only going to cash 18% of that anyway.

No, but that's great that you're able to connect with those people and also that you're available, and you guys have to be, I guess, to some degree with your audience. So not everybody does that. A lot of people, they get it, they do the show, They jump on a jet, they're out of there.

We're not doing that.

Yeah, well, that's the thing. That's not us. I mean, I don't know how he's going to do that flight, but you guys got long flights. I hope that's private.

We don't. We definitely don't. We don't do that. No, we can't afford private.

Nor can I. Yeah.

No. Well, I've had guys, a lot of conversations with guys in your generation of comics, and a lot of them say they have an ultimate plan to do one more or two more, and then they're done. Of specials? Yeah. Is that like you or you're like, I'll do it till I don't feel like it?

Oh, no, I'm not that way at all. I feel like I got maybe one more in me, but let's see how this one turns out. I'm hoping that people get the jokes and don't hate the jokes and that thing. But I never really felt the pressure to do this special because I was constantly touring. But I know you have to do them. But the young guys like Sam Marelle and Mark Norman, these guys are able to turn an hour. Really, it's impressive the way they do it. They are, yeah. And you Otherwise, I feel like the ability to turn an hour now is also part of the game. I don't know. If I was a storyteller, maybe it would be easier to do it, where it's a long-form thing. But what I tried in this special is I wanted to do... I've never been a story guy, so I took stories and I put a lot of jokes in them to see how that'll look. I was just trying to make it more easier for people to digest. But at the end of the day, it's just a a bunch of jokes. I guess if you had more...

I don't know, what do you think makes it good special? I don't particularly like... I like jokes right off the top. I don't like the build. I don't like any of that thing where they got a lot to say, and then there's a couple of jokes. I'm not into that.

I'm into like- You're like, go, go, go, go, But what do you think?

Do you feel like a good special is really more about content, or is it about the production and all that stuff?

I think it's content-based. But what's a bummer now is I think there's so much shit and noise out there. I think once you find your audience, if you're lucky enough to find one, fucking God bless and God speed, because I think it's tough.

Yeah. No, I agree.

There's so much fucking noise. I mean, it's like a million people are putting out clips and specials and crowd work, and it's almost so inundated now that as a fan, I remember me being young as a fan in high school of stand-up. There was like six people putting out specials. It was really rare.

Well, there's so much comedy to watch. If I was jealous of anything. It would be as a young comic, there wasn't really that much to watch. You had to buy the albums, like the Eddie Murphy's. Then there would be specials on pay-per-view and stuff like that. So that was really your comedy experience. And I had all the George Carlin stuff, and I had all the Lenny Bruce thing and all the just great comics. I had their albums and I was listening to them, but I didn't want to be a comic. I was just a fan. But now as a fan of comedy, you're like, Whoa, look at all this stuff. Then there's all this talk by the people that you like on these podcasts. You got to know more about them. It's like paradise for fans of comedy, like super fans. This is the time.

Do you ever... It's another dumb question. No, none of them are dumb. Do you ever take a vacation?

No, that's a good question. I don't do it. I have a lot of bills. Plus, I really don't know what to do with myself. That's why when you said I was in Australia for two and a half months, it's like, okay, I get it. The first week or two, there's some stuff to do. Hit all the museums, all that stuff. Then after that, you're basically, you don't live there, but you're not a tourist, and you're just a guy there. So then it's like, how do you spend your day? Whatever. You got to go to the dentist. What do you do? That thing. Yeah.

Well, it's It's hard to when you're working in another city to even get any rhythm because you're so not used to it. By the end of it, you get a little bit acquainted with the way things work. But I rented a car. I asked production if I could have a car, and I was like, I'll pay for it.

Do they drive on the other side? Yeah, they do. What are you going to do? No, I'm just saying that I would be afraid to drive in another country.

You knock it out so fast, man. Really? It's such an easy... Once you try it once, you right away are like, Okay, I get it. I mean, unless you have crazy anxiety, but you grew up in New York and you probably don't drive much.

I I have a car and I do drive and it sucks there. And it really does. Every day, it's another nightmare. So is it a lot of traffic there in Melbourne?

It's a super heavy, busy Metro area, and it's designed very poorly. So everything It's bumper a bumper all the time.

Wow.

But it's lovely. But it's just busy as fuck.

Is it ugly? I thought it was a beautiful town.

It's beautiful. I mean, the roadways are designed in a way where I don't think the infrastructure was wrong. They didn't know how many people were going to live there. Because as soon as you leave the city, It would take me as long as LA traffic is where you're like, I'm going three miles or five kilometers, but I couldn't get there in an efficient amount of time. It was just hard. A lot of one-ways, all that shit.

Did you mix with the local comics?

I tried to meet a few of them. I knew one of them from before for meeting him here in the States. But it's tough because their clubs aren't like our clubs. I went to a couple of the clubs there, and you think it's a I could walk to the club, but they only had certain nights of the week would have shows. That sucks.

It was dark. It was weird. I bet you Jeff didn't like that either.

No, Jeff was also doing shows with Dave.

Oh, that's cool. When Chapelle came down. A little bit easier. And Dave was down there for a long time, too, right?

Yeah, he was doing the arenas and then toured around.

That must have been awesome.

You played arenas before.

I did the Madison Square Garden. I was part of the 9/11 tribute. Luckily, they wanted me on that because I've never... I always had these... I'm not one of these guys were like, my goal is to be Madison Square, but it was interesting to finally get up there and see what it is because I've been to Madison Square Garden as a kid, but to be on the stage. And just the acoustics were amazing. And I thought The one thing that you sacrifice in that situation is the acoustics. But no, in that room, that's great. But now, even those rooms are too small for today's headlines. It's funny. Nate could sell that out like 100 times. There's guys out there who are really No one ever thought it was going to be like this. Honestly, I'm surprised every day. The amazing amount of fans and how these guys really are saving. I think they really saved a lot of these venues. They were going to go under. Whenever you see a legend's tour, it's like, this guy and this guy, they're back. That's like, neither one of them could sell enough tickets, so they're together. The venues are probably like, Okay, we'll give you another shot.

That's it. Then after this, it's a festival. You're not going to... I was like, Pretty impressed. Yeah. How about you? Did you do the amphitheaters?

I've only done an arena with Bert.

Bert is great.

Bert shows. And I did the arenas. I did a couple of years with Rogan a while ago.

I can imagine. That must have been awesome, too.

It was crazy. But some of those arenas are so big. I don't even know if they can hear you. You're so far away.

It messes with all your timing. Yeah, that's the hardest part. Timing. I would say one thing, Bert is great in a big space.

He really is good. He's untouchable.

He really is like, he brings it close somehow.

People say you're going to start taking your shirt off on stage.

I would never do that. I would take my shoes off, though. For culture, like a cultural thing.

But socks, leave them on or take them off?

It really depends what time of the week it is. Wednesday is usually- It's Tuesday. Oh, it's Wednesday. Wednesday is Sock Day. Thursday, not so much. I ring them out. But yeah, no, dude, that's great that you got that experience in those things. It was great. I mean, think about When it's your time to do that thing, you'll be like, All right, I've already done it. A little bit.

I don't care to get any... I like to do clubs in small theaters, and I'll do this till I'm dead if I'm lucky enough to do it.

The one thing that you got to do now, I think, is keep your eyes open. So right now, clubs and theaters, I think that every year there's another way to do comedy, another way to bring it out there. But the live entertainment, there's nothing that beats that. I thought during the... When everything was closed, that the Zoom shows would somehow get people used to like, Hey, I don't have to go to a club. I could sit in my own house, drink my own booze and hate it here. I don't have to go down there and just sit there like I'm bored. And it turns out that people miss the actual event of it. They miss the... Thank God. Yeah, thank God is right.

Dave, what's your coffee order?

My coffee order. Every time I see you- I thought you were going to ask me if I'll do cruise ships. I was like, You know what? I think I'm almost at that age now.

What's David's coffee order?

But I'm more of a garbage scow man. No one's ever played a scow. A scow? My coffee order, I drink probably about 10 cups of coffee a day. Jesus. I like ice coffee the most. I like ice coffee with a little milk and some sweetener in it, but I'm trying to get off that sweetener, and it's just so tough.

Why? Is it bad for you?

That's what I hear.

But they say this, but what is it coming from?

I've never heard it. Milk also. You're not supposed to be drinking milk.

Yeah, but you never heard somebody go, Yeah, he died from I don't know.

I got to just say one thing. I don't know if it's the coffee itself or just that comforting feeling of a plastic straw in my mouth. I mean, honestly, knowing that everything's right in the world. That's right.

It's the balance.

Are you a coffee man? You don't look like a coffee guy. You seem like a Red Bull guy.

No, I have a cup of coffee right here. I brought coffee in because I've lost my little to-go cup that I love, my little Yeti. Yes. No, but I make coffee at home because- Is there a coffee place around here? There's a really good one. There's a really good one.

There's a good name like Justice or something like that.

No, there's one called Priscilla's, and it's phenomenal. Is it? It's a mom and pop shop. It's old school. They still grind beans there for you. Like you bring them.

Sounds like a long turnaround between cups of coffee.

No, they're really good. Actually, the whole area has a lot of mommy, poppy stuff that are from the old school days.

Yes, that's right.

So a lot of the corporate stuff is starting to make its way, but it's hard-pressed because the neighborhood likes the way it is.

Well, this This used to be a neighborhood of day drunks, too. They all worked in the business. They were always like, I built sets for blah, blah.

They're still here.

Four o'clock, they're already loaded. They were hanging out at some bar or something like that.

You can go to a bar. There's a bar a mile or two away from here called the Sun. It's an Irish pub, and that is a dark, sad, beautiful Union Man's Bar. That's where you go to disappear. You go play darts and quietly fade away into the bar.

That sounds fun.

See, that's your vacation.

No, I don't know. I mean, I'm just saying for those experience just to get off the street. But out here, it's always about how can I get more sun or I got to be outside. It's a lot of pressure.

I'm not allowed to be in the sun much, so I don't really- Yeah, I figured that would be hard on you. I don't Not much.

Did you factor that into when you moved here? Like the sun, it might kill me.

No, I thought I was either going to go to New York or Los Angeles just to start stand up. And when I was young, I never... California was like this.

The dream.

Yeah, it was just a fantasy place. I think the reason I chose this over going east or staying in Chicago or New York is because I knew people that could help me afford it. And I was scared to move to New York and not afford it.

Yeah, no, it is pretty pricing. It's tough on that.

It was just scary when I was young, I had no money. How old were you when you started?

I was about 22.

That's a guy who was 22, 23.

Yeah. It's tough.

Did you live at home when you started?

No. I was a grown man. I was doing jobs and living in Brooklyn and doing it. I would say one thing that it is really expensive to live in any of these big comedy towns now. Even Austin and Nashville, these are not cheap towns either. It's tough when you tell people on the road, they're like, What do you think I should do? I'm like, Well, you should go to New York. They got a lot more stage time. And they're like, I don't think I can afford the three grand a month. And I'm totally, here you are living in some other town like Tulsa. We can get a house for that.

What's your most underrated comedy town?

Underrated? Yeah. Oh, that's a good question because the big ones are still the big ones.

And what are the big ones?

I'm trying to think of where I've had continuously good shows and not just one great show. But I don't know. That's a really good question. It seems like all the ones that were underrated are now rated. Sure. For a while, Nashville wasn't always so hot as it is now. But there's a lot of towns, especially in the south, where I like to play a lot that my crowd really comes hard.

Have you done Huntsville, Alabama?

Yes, I have done it, and I liked it. That's a fun- I liked it a lot. It's a drive, but you can stop at the Buckeies. That's right. Get some jerky. That's right. Then you can get over to Huntsville, and I like it. And the only problem is that there's no flight out of there. So then you got to drive all the way back. Drive back to Nashville. And that's really what it is for me. I'm sure you're starting to feel it, too. How long have you been on the road?

I've been touring for about ten plus years. Yeah.

So now you get it now how it's really the travel that really is the job of it. It hurts. And these connection towns, it's hard to do them because it's like, I got to get back. I got to take care of people. So I would say that those are the towns where I used to play a lot. I'm not playing them as much.

Because you got to get home.

Yeah, I got to get home. My mother and all that stuff.

You are a sweet, caring man. I'm assuming people know that just by feeling your presence. But you bring candy to the girls at the Comedy Store every time you go.

I bring it to the staff. It's not like the girls. You know what I mean?

I meant the servers are mostly- Yeah, I'm trying to give them a...

I used to work in a club, so I know how monotonous and hard it is. So it's just like a little thing, but I don't broadcast that.

I just did. I apologize.

That's quite all right. Now, I don't know what I would do in Australia. I guess I would bring them some maybe Apaloni or what is it again? What's their money down there again?

Kangoo Bucks.

Kangoo Bucks.

Yeah, they call it Rubux. Really? Rubux. No, the queen is still on their money as well.

Thank God. Yeah.

I said it should be on ours. Where were you when she died, the queen?

Oh, I have a joke about that.

Oh, you do?

I really do.

That's right. The god saved the queen.

That, of course, is going to be another one of those. Like, the joke came out too late. Yeah, too late. By the time of the special, it was like, who? That's another thing. It's like people, you're like, Okay, this joke, it's really helped me out. And now you put it up there and then you look at the special and you're like, That is a blip. That wasn't as big as I thought it was going to be. But since you get that info from Netflix, did they tell you you could go back and go 10 minutes? They could tell you when they checked out. That's the joke right here. That's cool to have that info.

It's creepy to know exactly when people pick back up, too. It was also strange. They said that there was people that would start it and then a month later finish it, which I think is fucking The amount of time that they would wait to go back and pick it back up. I guess people's busy lives, but I do understand you doing it 37 minutes or whatever. To me, I've said that for a long time. Bobby and I were talking about him doing a special, and I said, You don't have to do an hour. You can do whatever the fuck you want. There's no rule to that thing anymore anyway.

But the hour is really the benchmark we all have been trying to shoot for. I mean, all the great hour comedies we all want to do. But I just don't think attention span there. I also think I could have fluffed out with some bad material, but this is the good stuff. I figured just give them that. Just give them just steak and none of the other stuff. But for you guys, I think that when you do an hour and now that you know when people check in and check out, it's like that gives you an edge on material. It really can help you go like, Oh, I need more jokes like that. That's the stuff that not really. So put it a different way. And Netflix also, they're like, put the hot stuff up front because that'll bring people in.

Yeah, you got to do it. Well, all the stuff is the hot stuff with your shit.

That's being too kind. But thanks, man. There's definitely stinkers in the crowd. There's some stinkers in the crowd of those jokes.

Well, people can watch Hot Cross Bonds right now on Netflix. It's out right now. Please watch it. I appreciate you coming on the show.

I'm going for longest title of a comedy special.

Hot Cross Bonds?Yes. What What's a memorable title from someone you know that was the worst title you've heard for a comedy special?

Well, I always thought Red Fox's Wash Your Ass. I thought that really... I think that says it all. And I was always like, Man, I wish I thought that one up because that one is great.

Wash your ass is great.

I mean, it's also like one of those where it's like a teachable moment. You should wash your ass.

Yeah, you really should. Yeah. And for years, so many of us didn't.

Well, I've heard so many good things, and it's finally cool to actually sit down with And next time I do a show, you should definitely come on. I would love to. And bring Bobby because it's always great to see him.

It's hard to wrangle him, but I will try my best.

But I want to come back on a podcast with you guys.

You got to come on with us.

Because I would love to mix it up with Bobby.

Yes. We'll get you on the bad friends. Again, go watch Hoshcrap Sponds on Netflix right now, Dave. It's a pleasure.

You're the best. Thank you again for having me.

Will you look in that camera right there? We end the episode the same way with one word or one phrase whenever you're ready. One word or one phrase.

One word or one phrase.

One word or one phrase to end.

Okay, something no one's ever done. In here, we pour a whisk, whisk, whisk, whisk, whisk in the ginger beard.

Sturdy and ginger.

Like vampires, the ginger gene is a curse. Ginger's a fugival. You owe me $5 for the whiskey and $75 for the horse.

Ginger's, oh, hell no.

This whiskey is excellent.

Ginger. I like gingers.