What up, whiskey? Ginger fans, welcome back to the show. If it's your first time joining the show, welcome to the show. Hey, I want to tell you, I am going on tour. The Freeze Peach tour is coming to your town. I'm all over the place. I'm at Frank, California. That's up north. Then I go to Indianapolis. I go to Charlotte. I'll go to Waukee, Iowa, which is basically Des Moines. Des Moines, I screwed it up last time. That's Des Moines, Iowa. Walkie, Iowa, Omaha, Nebraska. Kansas City, Cleveland, St. Louis. Grand Rapids. Detroit, New Orleans down there, New Orleans, San Antonio, Chicago, my home. Durham, North Carolina. Atlanta, Georgia, Charleston, Philly, New York, Phoenix, San Francisco, San Diego. Boston, Massachusetts, which, by the way, we added a second show, let's hope. Do we add three and four and five at the Wilbur Theater, Minneapolis, Minnesota for the final two shows to wrap up the tour. February of next year, I am coming to you. We're adding cities as we go, so don't fret if you don't see your city or hear it. We're coming. We're adding them as, as we go. We're working with venues. Go to andrewsantino.com for those tickets.

Andrewsantino.com for those tickets.

In here we pour, whisk, whisk, whisk, whisk, whisk.

You that creature in the ginger beard, sturdy and ginger like vampires.

The ginger gene is a curse. Gingers are beautiful. You owe me dollar five for the whiskey, dollar 75 for the horse.

Gingers are hell, no. This whiskey is excellent ginger. I like gingers. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to Whiskey Ginger. My guest today is one of my favorite people. I know if I say that for all my guests, but I mean, once again today it is the return of Sam Morell. Good to see you. And he has a special out right now. Great to see you, my friend. Please go watch his special. It is available on Amazon.

You've changed. Give it a watch. Man.

How incredible that you've changed. You switched, huh? To Amazon?

Yeah. This guy, huh? Free agent signing.

Everybody jump ship.

Dude, you did too.

I went to Hulu. I'm on Hulu now. Well, I won't be there till next year, but Hulu is. I can't say the names. I'm sorry, but there's a bunch of new comics on. Switching to Amazon.

Yeah, no, I met with them too, and I heard the names. I was like, man, they did good.

We all left. Isn't that weird? Why did everyone leave where there was other opportunities out there, cuz.

You know, Netflix is great, but, you know, it's like. You feel. It's the closest. You feel like a sports free agent. You're like, I'm gonna test the market, see if anyone else likes me. Other people like us.

Yeah, other people like us. I'm gonna go play for another team.

Netflix is like. It's like, almost like you want to come over and, like, just go down on me. That's their vibe.

Yeah, you're like, I don't. Do I get to come? And they're like, no, I mean, you get to enjoy me coming.

That's what it feels like.

That's exactly what it feels like.

So. Yeah, no, they. Look, they. They're also putting out a ton. It's not like. I don't think they're losing sleep over losing us.

No, no, they don't care. They don't care at all, which is fine. Yeah, it is what it is. But we're moving on. But go watch it right now on Emma's Hun. Congratulations. That's huge. Speaking of teams and switching, I'm sorry about the Knicks. That's. Oh, no, I know it hurts. I saw you guys. I saw you guys at the games. Look, everybody, I don't care if you're a sports fan or not listening to the pod. Everyone was rooting for New York. It was just like, it's nice when New York.

Not according to my fucking mentions on Twitter. Jesus Christ. I feel like Philly.

I'm trolling.

I feel like Philly doxed. They're, like, trying to dox me. They're like, where does this fucker live? Philly fans are menaces, man.

Yeah, they're evil.

They're hilarious. I'm like, the shit I'm getting. And indie after Philly was like, nothing. Yeah, indie Twitter. They're, like, angry, but they're, like, more angry. Like, why doesn't anyone pay attention to us?

Well, they're going to church on Sunday.

You know what I mean?

Like, after a loss, they'll go pray it away, and they don't care. That's a different kind of anger. Philly is real hatred, real vitriol, which is why I actually love that city. Cause they're like. They give so much of a fuck. It's crazy animals, these people. I really like them.

I was game two. I was quartz eyed for the game where dante hit the game shot that won the game for us before the hardenstein block. And holy shit, that was epic. That was to be quartz over that second. I leave, shane Gillis is texting me like, you, motherfucker, they fouled him. They fouled. It's like, funny. You see, like, an ugly side. Cause I'm like, okay. But then, of course, I'm that guy in game five. I'm like, there was a foul. You know, you turn into that guy so easily. But, yeah, he was fuming.

Okay, tell me. Let's call him out right now, because I know you're a die hard. You are actually a die hard Knicks fan. You see a lot of guys in New york pop out of the woodwork that have become, that became Knicks fans. Did you see anybody that you were like, when did you start liking the fucking Knicks? And you're coming around a little bit, huh?

I don't, as long as they don't act like they've been there the whole time, I don't care. But, like, you see people on the.

Internet, I'm like, is this guy's a Knicks fan, huh? I didn't know that this was, well.

You said before, like, you were saying, like, people, like, kind of adopted the Knicks because they're such a fun team.

It is.

Because I don't think anyone expected them to be this awesome. Like, no one. Any of these guys, Brunson fucking people.

Thought they would do good, have a good season, but I don't think anybody thought they were gonna go as far as they went.

But now, but now we're kind of like, oh, shit. They would have gone further if it wasn't for everyone being injured. So, yeah, next year, I'm pumped. I love, I love the whole squad. They just got to bring everyone back.

All right. By the time this episode comes out, who knows? Because this will be coming out when your special is out. Yeah, Boston.

They're good, man. I don't know.

I think so, dude.

I know. I hope so.

I put some money on them.

Did you?

I. Dude, like a fool, I put some money on Boston just because I feel like it's. I don't know. It's a story that needs to be told. The Kyrie of it all was kind of fascinating to me.

It's unbelievable. He's probably, like, my favorite guy to watch, though.

He's incredible. But it is cool to see this. This right, this, like, this unusual rivalry. It's not a rivalry, but it has.

Become so because they kind of, because there's so many trades now that no matter what, no matter who's there, they're like, he used to play there.

I know. Why?

Porzingis.

Everyone switch. It's like everyone left where I think that kind of adds to the element of this, the drama of the game.

Buy a jersey anymore that could be like your enemy in two months. You don't know how it works, dude. Boston itself. I taped the special in Boston cuz I'm like, I love the Wilbur. But people were telling me, they're like, oh, you taping the fucking enemies? I'm like, do you know how touring works? Yeah, it's a good city.

Yeah. What are we talking about?

Hate the city.

I like my favorite comedy cities that I've ever, every time I go back.

There I'm like, I love them.

This is the great. You taped at the Wilbur?

Yeah.

What a choice.

Yeah.

That's such a great venue.

Yeah, you did, you did Denver last time, right?

In Denver last time.

That's a sick one.

And this upcoming, I don't know if I can. Well, I'll say it. It's not locked yet, but I'm not shooting it for a while. But it's supposed to be in Minneapolis. I'm supposed to, dude, I loved it. I don't know, every time I've gone out there they've treated me really well. And I'm doing it in the winter, which is always good for comedy in the midwest because people are like, let's go out of our house, go watch a show. Booze bags, dude, that's what I said. You go to the Midwest in like July, they're on the lake, they're nowhere to be found. It's that it's such a tough time to do shows every time I go.

They're a great audience there.

No, they're the best.

Midwest is great.

Midwest is great. So hopefully this will work out. I think we're trying to lock this up and then I'll do that. But you taped in at the Wilbur, such a great historic venue. And people that don't know, I mean, it's like a comedian's all comics love the Wilbur.

You know what's great too? There was a guy at a show, I did the Wilbur last year too, and there was a guy at the show last time, he was heckling me and he's like telling me somehow we get to the story out of him. At the end of the show, I'll do my hour, but then I'll start fucking around. And he was like, last time I was here was for Nick Swardson. And I was so happy that I did a Terry impression on the train afterwards and some gay guy thought I was making fun of him because he's no Swardson's character from Reno, the rolling blade.

Roller skates.

Yeah. So he's doing that impression. Some gay guy thinks he's mocking him. They get into a fight, he beats the shit out of the gay guy. He goes to prison, and he comes out and he's telling the story of my. And I was like, well, did you learn your lesson? He's like, yeah, I'm a better person. I'm like, all right, good. He's at my taping again, and he heckles me, too. I'm like, I know that voice. I was like, are you the hate crime guy? He's like, I'm the hate crime guy. I'm like, ah, geez, he's back. The hate crime guy's back. But he was like, I bettered myself. Of course, the thing he yelled at at the end of my tape. And I was like, all right, tell me a problem, and I'll solve it. And his problem was that he got drunk and pissed on his couch. I'm like, all right, he hasn't gotten that much better. It's better than hate crime.

Yeah, no more beating up homosexuals in the streets. But you're not blacking out and pissing yourself.

I mean, you know, such a Boston heckle, I love it.

But an accidental hate crime is very funny. It's a very. Curb your enthusiasm. You know what I mean? It's like, we didn't know.

We didn't know Larry if he was italian.

Yeah.

Yeah, no, Boston was. But we were just talking about this before. We were rolling. Like, every city's in the toilet now. It's hilarious that, like, you watch on the news and they're like, oh, and the cities are dangerous. And, like, since I was a kid, I'm like, give me a break. But now I'm like, that's kind of shady. And every. Every city I know.

Well, dude, we started at Chicago. My hometown started. We got worse fast for some reason. We got bad so fast. And then it started to creep into other major cities where New York forever. You know, New York is one of those places where I've always felt pretty safe, you know? You know what I mean?

To an extent.

To an extent, of course.

But it's gotten shady.

But it's got a little shady.

I'm in a nice neighborhood, and it's. I went outside just to, like, write the other day, just to sit outside. And there were so many people on drugs who were, like, aggressive, just going nuts. I'm like, holy sh. I can't write. Cause I can't focus. Cause I'm just like. I gotta keep my guard up a little bit.

Get just a little sketched out.

But there's not a lot. You can't be like, do you mind? I'm working on the screenplay.

This is a little rude.

I know that your life's in the toilet, but it's pretty rude that I can't.

Look, I don't know what your dad did to you, but I'm doing act three right now and it's very important. It's integral to the story. No, did you see the guy? There was a guy in Southern California here on the news. Look up. This fucking lunatic had a mental break. And this is the first time I've ever heard of this. He was just shooting at traffic. He was standing on the side of the road shooting at traffic. Yeah. Just a God. But he had something, you know, we've.

All felt that way in LA.

A hundred percent. Oh, my God. But he was walking along the side of the street just shooting at cars.

Where does that go?

Down south is in Orange county or something. But he's. You could tell, you know, something. He had a mental crack. And he's literally like walking. He looks calm. He's walk. They have, you know, cctv cameras, you know, like, or whatever. And he's just walking along the street near a gas station. And then he just stops and he just pulls out a gun. And he's just shooting into trap. I mean, into. And it's, it's, it is cars going probably 30, 40 miles an hour. So it's like flow. The flow, not bumper to bumper. So he's shooting at cars as they're zipping by. And he killed a guy. Ready? Killed a father or something like that.

Yeah, I was in south LA.

South LA, yeah. And he shot. What? He shot at a bunch of cars. But one hit. And the first ugly thought I had, I was like, how unlucky is that motherfucker that for the timing of a bullet to go through? You know what I mean? The car is flying by. The bullet that got the guy on the thing, I was like, that's. What are the chances? I mean, he was shooting blindly into cars. It wasn't like he's aiming at all. This isn't John Wick. You know what I mean? He's fucking.

That's brutal. It was a guy, too, that got carjacked. The general hospital guy here.

And he died in the shot downtown.

I know, yeah, I.

Well, that's the other thing is like, again, you know this about New York. We all know this about these major cities. There's sometimes places at certain times day, you're like, I shouldn't be over there. Yeah, well, you would know better.

A lot of these guys on drugs, they're not like, I feel bad for cops, man. Like. Like, because how do you deal with these people? They're not. It's not like they respond. They're like zombies, right? They're so drugged out. So I saw a guy walk into the coffee shop, and there was only one person working. I was like, let me just hang outside. But in the back of my head, I'm like, what am I going to be able to do?

Nothing.

There's nothing.

Nothing.

These dudes all have, like, the strength of Tony Montana and the last seen of Scarface where, like, you shoot bullets at them, you feel like they're not going to go down. They're on these drugs where you're like, this is fucking crazy.

Yeah, it's for. And. But also they have liter. You know, there's an idea that, like, sometimes people who are in distress have nothing to lose. Those guys have so little to lose, they can't wait for you to say the wrong thing where it's like, yes, say some dumb shit to me. But it's also, this is where corporate kicks in. This is where, like, the. This is where the corporate. If it. If a guy walks into a Starbucks that's there, they have to take action immediately to protect. But the mom and pop boutique coffee shops, they have to let that guy go take a shit in the bathroom. Otherwise, you know what I mean? Otherwise they're breaking this like mom and pop. We're cool code.

I don't know, dude. Yeah, out here, it happens, though.

You see them walk into these kind of places at a Starbucks, they'll fuck. Or a corporate place, they'll shut. They'll kick you the fuck out immediately.

That ain't fair for what they're paying them that they have to now be.

No, it sucks. Well, CV's has security, you know, like, they have security guards now, but do.

You think Covid kind of killed that? We're like, people just started stealing and they're like, yeah, I'm not doing shit.

But isn't that ironic? It's not. Homeless guys on drug stealing.

Yeah. Function steal.

Yeah. They know they can steal. Yeah. People with jobs, they're like, I'm taking this. Fuck this.

For the first time you hear Walmart's not stopping us anymore. They're like, yeah, we should go.

By the way, I went to Costco for the first time. And I've never been to Costco in Los Angeles, California.

It was pretty fun, dude.

I went for the first time because I was like, we. We were going to get a tv. And in my mind, back in the day, you would hear people be like, dude, Costco has tvs for half the price of the. But, you know, whatever. So we go in there and I see a tv I like, and I was like, hey, this is fucking awesome. That's really well priced. But just because I'm a cynic, I was like, hold on. And I google it. The same price of Best Buy, same price, like, everywhere. And I was like, ah, this isn't a thing anymore. The Costco didn't. Costco used to be, like, you could go get, like, dope shit for a little bit cheaper because of the membership or whatever.

I never got, like, a tv or anything there, but just getting, like. I feel. You get, like, a shitload of muffins for, like, a cheap.

Yeah, but I'm. How many muffins do I fucking need?

Well, that's the point. It's like, you do. You know, that was like, one of. That was an early Sam joke is I was like, you know, you can't break up with a girl if you go to Costco right after, like, I want. I hate you, too. But we got a jug of animal crackers we have to finish. That was early Sam. Cleen trying to get on Letterman Sam. But no, I mean, yeah, you get, like, a big Hellman's mayo thing. That's. That's what it's for.

Toilet paper scares me. Yeah, well, it's for. It feels like it's built for Mormons. It's feel.

Hoarders.

Yeah, more. More. Yeah, Mormon hoarders. Families that. Families of, like, 40. Because it's absurd. When you see people walk out of there with, you know, 96 rolls of toilet paper, you're like, come on, man.

They're the people that everyone hated during COVID The people that are, like, hoarding. But that's. But that. It was made. It's kind of made for Covid.

No, it's perfect for Covid. Yeah, we. I found. When we moved out, I found old Covid ration spot tucked away above our fridge.

You know, like, only rations is, like, prison Covid and the Holocaust. That's where you hear that shit. The worst.

And which one was really the worst, Sam?

I deny both. I don't know. I was just watching the new Hitler thing on Netflix. It's pretty good.

Wait, what is it. What do you mean?

It's a good.

It's like, that's why I don't do Netflix anymore, by the way. I refuse. You support Hitler now, and I'm sick of it. Wait, it's a docusome. What's it called? What is this called?

Hitler and the Nazis evil on trial.

Yeah, yeah. Whoa. Oh, dude.

What was the trial?

The bitter. The bitter comic who's like, they got money for Hitler, but not for to go to Amazon. Thanks. Netflix. No, yeah, it was. It's like a. It's cool, it's a good one, but.

I see just the insight of a lunatic. It's just like. It's a document.

It's Nuremberg. So they're doing the trial.

God. Yeah.

And then, I mean, it's just hilarious that a guy had to, like, defend the Nazis. There's a guy like, you think OJ is a bad gig. This guy had to get the Nazis, you know, but it's pretty good.

You imagine at his firm, they were like, and one of our newest hirees is going to be taking this new case. It's like, yes. Fuck, yeah. What is it? It's Hitler. We feel like you've got the skillset and the ability. You know, they threw it on. They threw it that to the guy that was like, I don't think I want to.

Well, do you know?

I think I want to do this.

We're watching, and it's like, I was watching my girlfriend, and she's just like, this rise is very similar to Trump. And I'm like, can we stop with that? I don't mean to be a dick, but you're kind of trivializing the Holocaust. Whenever you compare Hitler to Trump, it's a little different. Or trusted Hitler, rather.

Just a little. Just a little different.

A little different.

Yeah, no, it's.

I get it. You get. You say shit like, there are certain talking points you say to rile people up. I get that. But once you start comparing, his sensationalism is similar, right?

Like his. Of course, his chaotic. Not similar to Hitler. I mean, similar to, like, any kind of wild dictator leader. He has the same sensationalized.

He studies dictatorship.

Oh, yeah, for sure.

And he talks about mein comp 100%. He talks about it, but, you know.

It'S a good book. They say the Bible's the good book. I say mein Kampf is the good.

Book, but, I mean, we're talking about, like, a narcissist versus, like, a pure sociopath. There's a difference.

Yeah, totally different. Yeah.

Trump just I don't think Trump believes anything. I think he's just like, yeah, I'll just. Yeah, that sounds like good. I'll do that. Works for me, you know? Right.

You know what's so funny? If that energy is just directed just one notch differently, it's just a cool guy that goes along with everything.

Right?

Do you know what I mean? But his is ego and power where the other side of it is a guy going, someone in the room, you know, there's always a guy or someone in the room, and they're like, what do you want this pizza good? And some guy's always like, yeah, it's fine. That guy. It's a dial away from like, yeah, I like everything that everybody likes. I just want to feel good.

Or Trump can go, he'll go the other way. Feel like he'd be fun for talking shit. This pizza sucks. He's like, worst pizza I've ever had in my life.

Yeah. And then later you're like, that pizza's not bad. And you go, not bad at all. It's actually not bad. I don't mind. I actually don't mind that pizza.

He's good. In a bachelor party type group, you need a trump.

And a bachelor party, everybody needs a trump in their crew. Yeah, he's not the same, but he's, you know, he's. He's 77. 77.

Something like that. He's getting up there. But he's a vibrant 77.

Yeah, but 77, it's old. I just feel like we have a minimum age. We should have a maximum age. I do feel that. Yeah, 35 is low, right? Isn't that the lowest age you could be, 35 to be president?

Yes.

I feel like the ceiling to me, like, 65 past 65. You're like, you're not really in tune with what is coming down the road, and also, it's not gonna affect you. By the time the youth in their twenties really get into the thriving part of the economy and the business world, you're dead. That 65 year old will not be around in 25 years. The likelihood is extremely low. So it's just kind of like.

So you don't really care about the future?

Yeah, that's what I'm saying. When you're at that point, what the fuck do you care? Because in 15 to 20 years, that's not gonna affect you.

Well, you had the. You had the bit about Kamala Harris and Biden. You're like, push him, push him.

What are you waiting.

What could you be waiting for?

Yeah.

I mean, yeah, they're just so fucking old.

Biden's older than Israel.

That sounds like a roast joke. Yeah. Motherfuckers. Older than Israel.

He's 81. Yeah, 82.

And.

Yeah, he was born in 1942.

That is, if you believe in Israel, 48. Yeah. That's crazy. He's 81. 81, right? 81.

Yeah.

No, it's just too much. I do think there should be a ceiling. It should just be a cap, because then you have enough. I mean, like, look at JFK. He was 40. What? When he was became president. I want to say 43.

He was young.

He was one of the youngest of all time. Yeah, 43. 44. Cause he died at 46 or 47.

Yeah, 43.

That's crazy young. Yeah, that's our age.

Like, yeah.

That, I feel like is not too young, but I would be so scared to have that, like, a friend.

We were like, you're president. Yeah.

Well, that's how, you know, that's how soder talks about McDaniel, where he's, like, coaching a football team.

Yeah.

Didn't we used to get high?

In my baseball way, I'm like, you're gonna have kids. Yeah. I'm still that way with my friends.

Yeah, but they're giving you a kid.

But, yeah, man. Yeah. I was just started listening to this, like, JFK podcast, like, about his assassination. It's Rob Reiner and Soledad O'Brien, but it's pretty good, actually.

I love Rob Reiner.

Yeah. Oh, my God. He's the best.

They're talking. What are they? Is it a conspiratorial thing?

Yeah, very, very conspiratorial. And I'm not a big conspiracy theory guy, but, like, that one's like a fucking layup. Are you kidding? Yeah. The two that. Even if you're not a conspiracy theory, like that and Epstein are, like, pretty.

Pretty wide open. Yeah, we see it. Yeah. Is you're like, oh, this. This lines up. This all kind of lines up. Well, have you been to where JFK got shot? Have you been there?

Yeah. Yeah.

I used to tell a joke on stage. I used to say, when we went there, me and O'Connor went. Me and Chris O'Connor, and. And we were a little hungover. We've gone out the night before, and we made it down there.

His head hurt, too.

That's it.

In here, we pour.

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Yeah.

And we looked up at the book depository and both of us were like, it's a pretty good shot.

He had ranged.

Pretty good shot. Dude. You gotta admit, man, that was so far away. You're like, that's a pretty good fight. So clearly when you go there, you're like, this is so coordinated to be able to do that from that little nook window in a time, by the way, when the accuracy, you would have to be one of the best shooters in the fucking world.

Yeah.

Not just some lunatic who's been.

You'd have to have some real training.

Ah, come on. You'd have to have. Yeah, this would have to be, uh. You know, this would be a layered incident. There's no fucking chance. It's. It's. It's creepy and gross. And also, when you start to learn about all, like, the car, the secret service that were standing down on certain parts of the car, when almost always they would be in line of fire.

A lot of weird shit happened. Weird, weird, perfect shit this nightclub owner, Jack Ruby, just shot, right? Lee Harvey Oswald. It's like a lot of weird stuff had to happen where you're like, does that. And then he claimed. He's like, well, I did it to spare his wife having to come down for the whole trial. I'm like, I've never heard of a nightclub owner with a heart. This doesn't sound right. None of this is lining up.

He's just a really good guy. Yeah. He runs nightclubs. Yeah. Yes. He has underage people in there and gives them drugs, but he's just a solid guy.

And then he kind of dies mysteriously.

Yeah.

A lot is so much weird shit going on, and it's all gonna bump. And as I said, I'm not the biggest conspiracy guy, but, like, holy shit, as you said, so much weird stuff had to line up forever for all.

This to kind of go the way that it went.

Yeah.

So, wait, I want to. I want to talk to you. We were talking about the. Go back real fast. I want you to admit, because you were saying, the darkness of the cities, everyone is like, New York is not. New York is. It's getting a little bad.

There's some dicey stuff.

And believe me, because everybody fights it online. Be like, no, it's not. But it is, though.

Yeah. I think just after Covid, just so many people lost their mind. And then you throw in the drug problem in the country, and you're like, yeah, it's a bad cocktail. I'll definitely take walks where I'm like, yeah, I'm fucking. I'm a little on edge here.

But you grew up that you didn't ever feel that way when you were a young man?

No, of course not.

Yeah, that's true.

I mean, there were definitely, like, people that would, like, try to mug you and stuff, but it wasn't like they were like you could look into their eyes and see a soul. I mean, this is like.

You see the lights were on.

They really do. It does feel like. I mean, there's, like, a real drug problem in the country. And I don't think anyone gives. I think Mayor Adams just wanted to get elected to, like, meet Beyonce or whatever. Whatever you get to do as mayor.

You get to meet Beyonce. Yeah.

And I say this as a guy. I did a benefit once, and Mayor Adams was laughing as my joke at my jokes. And there's the arrogance of a comedian where you're like, maybe he's a good mayor. Of course he laughed at my jokes, but at the same time, he's not a good mayor. We haven't had a good mayor in so long, and it's, who are you talking to?

You want to go toe to toe? We've had the worst run. We've had the worst run of all time.

I know.

Our political electees tell everyone to stay inside and wear a mask during COVID And then they go have fucking Michelin star dinners.

Gavin Newsom special there.

Dude, that's insane. Our elected officials in California are bananas. We're the worst of the worst. We're the worst of the worst.

He's pretty brutal, that guy. I mean, that's the thing. You want a politician to have some fucking soul. And they just. I mean, also, Mayor Adams has, like, a six pack. There's something about a guy, like, who's 60, who's ripped. I'm like, you're not focusing enough on the city, right? If you have time to be that shredded, I'm sorry.

All mayors should be out of shape.

All it really took was a guy to be like, you know, I used to be a cop. I can turn this city around. I'm like, have you been anywhere? Like, it's fucking bad. I mean, look at San Francisco. Look at all these cities that are like, I think some of the best cities in the country. I love San Francisco.

So do I.

It's a beautiful city. I mean, it's, like, european feeling. You have these, like, hills, these views. It's gorgeous. Great walking city, but same problem as New York.

You have a lot of sketched out.

I mean, yeah, if you have like a. Do you want a kid running out with, like, a ball? Like. No, no. It's like a dangerous.

Yeah, well, and also the disparity there is comical. I always say that you go to, like, russian hill, and I think it's russian hill. And you're talking like, 50, literally $50 million homes. Like, I mean, that isn't.

Well, that's the thing. It's like they still have their ego. New York and SFD cities. Now it feels like a college girl that was like, really hot as a freshman and then got, like, kind of fat. And they're like, still gotta work for it, dude. I don't know. I don't know if I still. The taxes in New York are absurd.

Oh, dude.

You know the bills you have to pay there are crazy. And they're still like, sorry, this is how it's gonna be.

Yeah, but we're suckers. We stay.

Of course. I'm a fucking idiot. I'm telling you. Like, I can't really advocate for the city anymore, but I still can't go. It's a sickness. Yeah.

It's almost like when someone's like, is that good what you're eating? You're like, no, but you know what? I need the nutrition, so I'm gonna fucking eat it.

It's awful.

It is.

We're Morgan Spurlock. And supersize me.

Rest in peace.

Rest in peace.

Rip this, burly.

Who could have pictured that that guy wouldn't live long after. After that movie, doctors were like, you shouldn't do this. And he's like, I gotta.

I'll be fine. I'll be fine.

That was a good movie, though.

It was so good.

It was really good.

But also, then it came out. We talked about this not too long ago on this show that he was in the throes of his drug and alcohol addiction while he was filming that, which we didn't know until posthumously. It kind of came out that he was a hardcore alcoholic. So part of his number skewing from that was dirty data because he was getting blacked out eating McDonald's. And you're like, well, yeah, dude, that's not gonna help. There's no control. If you're doing an experiment and you're blacking out and also eating McDonald's, the numbers are probably gonna get bad.

It's bad.

Like, remember that guy in the dock who would eat a Big Mac every day?

He's still alive and he looks way better than Margaret. You've seen this man. There's a guy that's been eating a Big Mac every day since he was, what, like 16 or something like that? And he set the world record. He's still doing it, by the way. You know, this is a Midwest guy. I forget where he lives, but God. God, help.

I'm gonna guess, like, Appleton, Wisconsin.

Yeah, it's gotta be.

He's from Green Bay.

That's pretty good. I just guess Appleton. I've been on those flights. Those are some. They don't let you bring bags on board because the. Oh, my God.

We don't have enough gas to get up to Appleton, so we're gonna have to dump some bags.

Dude, that's.

That's. That is. That is homegrown Midwest. Wisconsin is. And I fucking love Wisconsin.

I love it.

Don Borsky. Yeah.

Gorski.

Don Gorski. I have a Big Mac hamburger every day, and he's had it for how many years? 50 some odd year now. It's got to be. I mean, it's been.

Yeah.

It says here on Wikipedia he's eaten over 34,128.

Jesus Christ.

Those are the people that. The second they have, like, one salad, they're fucking.

They die. He goes to the hospital. You have can't. You're riddled with cancer. The Big Macs have been keeping your cancer at bay. The Big Macs. The Big Macs have been chemo for you. You stopped chemo by stopping Big Macs, and now you'll die.

Well, the funny thing about that movie supersized me is when, like, he got them to do away with the super size thing. That was, like, the big victory. But I'm like, it's still. They can still order, like, two fries, right? They're still killing themselves.

This is my same theory about, you know, when someone's like, we were talking about this at baseball games. You know, you have to. Can't order beer after the 7th inning stretch. Or same thing.

You just drink more.

Yeah, that. It's Boston.

This. The bars close earlier. Do they seem like healthy people in Boston? Like, they just get it all in.

Before the theory doesn't work. It's just gonna black out quicker. Which I think is more dangerous than if you let people drink slower and longer over the course of the night. It's a lot easier for them to temper it off so they won't be as fucked up. I always thought that was such a foolish idea. I'm like, they're either doing that for concessions to close up so they can clean up, to get out of there early because there's no chance that there's insurance laws being like, can't serve after a certain hour because then people are going to be drinking and driving. I think that's the cell is, like, the gap time of getting out of there. What are you talking about? I had. I had six in the first three innings, you know, fucked up. Yeah. You still fights like, what are we talking? There's no way that changed. Like, same thing when you go to a Knicks game. You can't order after a certain amount of time. They close down beer floor, sales. Right.

What do they say? We're going to drunk walk? Yeah, I'm walking.

I want you blacking out, walking around here.

No, there is something about, like, they think they're being healthier, but it's like, who you helping? I don't. I don't.

Well, we don't because we really don't care. Right. As not people, but the government doesn't really give a fuck. They're just. Everyone's saving their own ass, like we learned yesterday. This is crazy. Don't look up the number, but don't say anything. How many cigarettes do you think are smoked in a day every day around the world, but.

Oh, geez, I wouldn't even know where to get.

It's an insane guess, but just think about it. You know, you've. What is it? How many billion, 7 billion people? Something like that, right? Aren't we six and a. Six and a half or something? How many cigarettes you think are smoked today?

A million.

A million cigarettes.

Is that crazy high?

Crazy low. Crazy low.

Oh, low.

Crazy amount of cigarettes around the world?

Yeah, I guess I didn't factor in China. Let me get.

Let me get India. China.

Yeah. Okay. How about, like, 10 million, 14 billion.

A day are smoked?

Damn.

Look that up. It's up.

I can't find anything specifically saying 14 billion.

We did the math on it last night at dinner. Me and Sal volcano were out to dinner, and we did the math. It said, what do. How many cigarettes are smoked a day globally? And then you'll see the number. 14 billion is what we deduced last night. After all was said and done. And I thought, fuck, we're in the wrong business. Oh, my God. Do we got to get into cigarette sales? Damn if that many people are still smoking and they don't advertise.

So, this is what it's on this site. It says in 2020, the world consumed about 5.2 trillion cigarettes. So in that, in the year of 2020. So 5.2 trillion divided by 365.

Well, do the math right there. 5.2 trillion divided by 365. I think it came out to around 14. You got to turn your phone sideways for that one. You know how the calculator. Fuck it. You got to go sideways.

14.2 billion.

I was right. 14.2 billion cigarettes in a day. And it just shook my soul to be like, this is a proven killer. Proven killer. Now, there's. There's no argument. Doesn't matter.

But in 2012, the world consumed 6.25 trillion sigs. So within eight years, it went down by about 1 trillion.

Hey, I feel like young people are vaping. They're not smoking as much.

Well, that's what's interesting. I wonder how skewed the numbers are with that. I said that I was at the club. Well, I don't know if I should say, well, whatever, it doesn't matter. It's all legal. But it's like, you know, all the observers at the club now, you know, as we get older, you know, they're all in their twenties and they're young hustlers, all really nice, sweet young kids. And they're, all of them waiting for the drink line. And they're all hitting the vape pen. And I mean, all of them. Like, I looked down the hallway for a second. Cause I was gonna go get a Diet Coke. And like six of them were all hitting vape pens. I was like, man, this is like the new revolution. Every young person is doing it where, you know, I started smoking in my twenties and it was when I was working. You had to take a big break to be able to go out and hit a cigarette. The convenience level was so low.

Well, New York had the. That's like right around when they had the. You gotta go outside to have a cigarette.

Right, right.

Cause I remember growing up doing clogs. Even, like, certain cities still let you smoke and cigarettes.

Oh, 100%.

Do you remember that?

Oh, yeah, dude. And no one, by the way, it felt so normal because growing up in Chicago, there's still a lot of Chicago places that kind of let you get away with it if you're a local and it's a townie bar. And it's. You know what I mean? It's like no one's gonna say anything now. No, but this is 1520 years ago. You still do it. No one really said shit. There was like an area. They're like, yeah, they smoke back there. If you don't like it, just don't go back there.

So funny picturing guys like Jerry Seinfeld, like clean comics and stuff in the eighties, just working these rooms covered in smoke. Like, you just don't picture that. That was their life.

Yeah, that is funny. What is it? What's with the smoke?

Emphysema.

Emphasema. Zima. An ad for Zima. Who was that? Who was the Zima guy? Who was it? It was, uh. What? Come on, dude. Remember the Zima, the commercials? Who was it? Was it, um. What comic did Zima adds?

Roger Kabler.

No, no, no. Fuck. Holy shit. There was a comedian that did ads for. Do you remember Zima. Zima was like a seltzer lemonade 100%. But it was way before its time.

It's pretty bad. It was so good when you were like 14.

Yeah. Cuz you were like, whoa, there's booze in this. Tastes like soda with booze.

And then you're like, fuck it, I want to be.

Oh, you know what I'm thinking of? I'm thinking of Richard Lewis with beaucoup. Do you remember Boku?

No.

Holy fuck. Boku was. We'll put up a picture for the audience. Boku Washington. Like a fruit flavored. I don't even know how to describe it. I don't know if it was out.

Premium beverage or something.

Yeah, Boku. Look at those ads for Boku.

My God, he's young there a fruit.

Juice brand in 1990 and it was a box. It was minute made, made it. It was box like a, like an adult juice. But Richard Lewis used to do commercials for it. Rip Richard Lewis, another fucking legend lost. No. You know, and that's one of those guys where, man, do I wish I.

Had him come on here.

I just wish I had. Because he was, I mean, what a king. I think that dude was so fucking.

He was awesome. I dm with him a couple of times, but I didn't know him really. Yeah.

He never met in person though.

No, never. No, no, I loved him. Curb is like, he's legendary on Curb.

I just think his style was so funny and self deprecatory in a way that you're like, you know, some people are self deprecating, but it's also like uplifting. You're like, man, you're really good. I love you.

I feel that. Yeah. Like, those are the guys that make me feel better about life.

Yeah.

Like, I remember, like, Rolling Stone had the album, like the most depressing album of all time. And it was Leonard Cohn's greatest hits. I'm like, his movie, his music makes me feel good. So good because it's like, it's self aware and like. And it's like he's not scared of how fuck. Or at least he doesn't act like he's scared of how dark the world is, you know?

No, he just knows that it exists. He's just saying the thing that a lot of people are like, I feel that way too.

But that's how, you know, that's how I feel. Like about any comic who's like, like, I watch a Richard pryor special, I'm like, oh, he's just, he's so at peace. With, like, you could say, like, some of this stuff makes him like a cautionary tale, some of this material. But he's so at peace with, like, how fucked up he is that he's able to joke about it.

Right. Well, cuz at some point I think it's probably so detrimental to your, you know, to your mental that you're like, well, I have to.

I have to.

It's either I, you know, that old cliche. It's like, either cry or I laugh. It's like, I might as well laugh about it.

When something bad happens, you, aren't you off often? Like, once the anger goes away, you're like, I'm gonna get a bit.

Yeah, yeah. Almost always. I think there's a bit. And I think this is part of a bit.

I remember having a meltdown when I was a really young comic. And I was like, I flew this website called Cheapo Air because, like, I was just trying to save money any way I could to go on the road, dumb merch stuff. And it was called cheapoair because you could do like Delta to American on a kinect, so you do different airlines, but then if you miss the kinect flight, you're fucked.

No one's responsible.

No one's responsible. I remember I missed a flight to do this festival in Grand Rapids, and I'm asking the guy at the desk, and he just, he's just a prick. He's just laughing at me because he's like, you idiot. And of course, now I see what a dumb ass I am. But in the moment, you're just like a struggling comic, and you're like, please just like, help me. And he just started laughing at me. And I go, you fat fuck. I just lost it. And people around me are like, like, once you feel people reaching for their phones, I'm just like, oh, I got to get it together. This is bad. But then the second, then I had to buy, like, a coach one way connect for like $600. And I was like, goddess, damn it.

I was all the money you were gonna make at the festival.

And. But then once it goes away, you're like, it'll be a bit, right?

And also totally my fault. It's almost always your fault when you're my fault, when you get really, really upset.

But he didn't have to laugh in my face. He could have been like, oh, that sucks.

Yeah, but it's very funny that he.

Did my fucking face.

Cheap aware, this fucking idiot.

Cut to the podcast sponsors cheapoair, great airline you could do if you're too broke for Expedia.

Go to Cheapo air.

Yeah.

They make you in the middle of the flight, like, you gotta jump out. There's a delta. You gotta be able to careen into another flight mid air.

We couldn't bring you a parachute. It's cheapoair. It's the only website that sounds like they're insulting you.

Right. Oh, God.

I tried to do it. No flights in cheapoair. I tried jew boy air. That was. I got a flight in here. We pour. Whisk, whisk.

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Ginger. I like gingers. What is your. When you brought up Leonard Cohen, it made me think, what's your like? Are you the kind of guy that puts on the music to match your mood, or you, do you offset it? Do you go the opposite? Like, if you're fucking bummed out, do you put on some shit that's gonna probably try to put you in a better mood or you really sink into it?

Damn, that's a good. That's a good quote. I don't know. I guess I go both ways. Like, yeah, sometimes if I'm like, end of the night, it's a lot of mood music. So if I need to get the energy up for, like, before show, put something like the bee gees on.

Oh, like, I would not pick you as a bee gees.

I love the. These were australian, but they felt so New York to me. I mean, I guess Saturday Night fever.

Helps the disco of New York.

In that era, music dude, they're just so cool.

Crazy. They're fucking australian.

I know about that all time.

Like what? Like, they don't. It doesn't. See everyone that is australian artist or either musician or performer, you almost never think of them as australian people do all the time with. What's his name? Christian Bale. No, no, no, he's Wales, I think. No, you know, I'm thinking of.

God.

What's wrong?

Gibson.

Mel Gibson's not australian. Yeah, yeah, but he's lived here for longer, right? He's like an American after the jew stuff. Maybe. Maybe he's a real american.

Tried to get him deported.

No, that made him a real american. He's juice. Gibson's one of us, man.

Hugh Jackman.

Hugh Jackman, yeah, Hugh Jackman. You never really. Every time I see him in interviews, I'm always like, right, he's not ours. Right.

Well, there's something about, like, I was thinking about, like, all those, you know, the bee gees. Another good, like, pump up before show. Music is electricity. Light orchestra.

Oh, yellow is the shit.

Fucking so good. I was gonna say Frankie Valley and Michael Jackson. I'm just like. I only listen to people whose balls haven't dropped. Basically. Just fucking high, boy.

Men that sound like women.

Yeah, I do love.

There are the men that sound like women, though. Like that fucking the Greta Van fleet. Love. I know people say it's like a zeppelin rip up, but, I mean, same thing.

Young people are turning on Zeppelin now.

What is that?

Young people, like our Hayden. I love Zeppelin.

Wait, why is the turn happening? I think after they're all gone because of Jimmy Page.

Probably the Jimmy Page stuff with the young chicks. But then also, what do you think the. You know, the word is that they stole from opening bands and stuff.

Yeah. Really?

Yeah.

Wow.

I don't fucking know. I still like their shit, but, yes, I don't know enough about music. Like, with comedy, I could totally be like, well, that's not true. Or that. Yeah, they did. See, I could have a. But I don't know enough. So I always feel.

None of us really do, though. Right?

We would.

Who would know? Except for the people that were really there, a part of the thing. And also, okay, if somebody accuses them of, like, ripping riffs or something like that, but they certainly didn't steal outright songs. And if they did, doesn't it feel like we would know by now? It almost feels like you'd.

It was harder to know back then.

Yeah. Those bands probably disappeared into nothing.

Think about all the music we love that was just like fucking people got fucked.

Oh, dude. Most of it. Most. I mean, I would say most particularly if you like stuff from like the, you know, like a. Like the. The soul era. That was like the dirtiest era of music in terms of like ripping off those artists and then making no fucking.

Oh, Hessian. The Sopranos is like. I feel like a big. That type of character is the reason why like black people do not like Jews, landlords, something like that. I don't know.

Well, they put that on the show to the jew. The fucking hasidic landlords. They inserted so much of that shit on that show.

Not good. In the Sopranos. In the defense, they didn't make Italians look great either.

No, yeah, it was. It was an even split, to be honest. No.

Yeah.

Oh yeah. The hasidic landlord episode. You just made me remember that.

That was hilarious.

So fucking his dad owned it, right? Is that what it was?

I don't. That was like an early app. Well, season one or something.

He's one or two, you know. So funny is I was talking to someone else about this. I went back and started rewatching cuz I. And I rewatched twice. By the third kind of go around.

I was like, all right, well, you're done with it.

Well, just because tv's so, so. There's so much. Really beautifully well shot. Awesome shit.

Have you not trying to fucking turn on the supreme?

No, no, I just. I think I can't watch it anymore. I think I need to put it a little break. I need a break.

I think tv is like, there's a lot of good tv, but like, man, I always go back to the classic shows just because of how good they are, you know?

Yeah.

I mean, the same way with movies.

I like comedy classic, but sometimes drama classic. I see a little corniness because time is so different. You know what I mean?

Like the way the great movies, I think. Hold up, the great stuff holds up. I think it does. I know what you mean. Like, there's definitely some.

There were some moments in Sopranos where I was like, this is fucking pretty cool.

Season one, episode three.

Episode three with the acidic Hotel. That's right. This is Hasidic Motel.

Shlomo Tiddleman.

Shlomo Tiddleman. Shout out to Shlomo Tiddleman. Which is actually Samrrell's birth name.

It was, changed it. Gary Goldman always calls me Shlomo.

Does he really?

Yeah, yeah. He calls me Shmuley, actually. Yeah. Shmuley's such a good name. Shmuley's a funny one.

What is this? Where does this come from? Was this just a term of endearment?

Hebrew name Shmuley? I don't think it is.

But you don't even know what your hebrew name is.

I think it'd be, like, shimon or something like that. Shimon something. You probably look it up.

What is it based on? How do you know? It's given, right? It's given.

I have no idea.

It's so funny. What? A bad jew doesn't even fucking. Doesn't even know how it works.

It might be Shmuley.

Shuli means his name is God.

Oh, fuck. Yeah.

All right.

Do you remember your bar mitzvah or no?

A little bit, yeah. I was, like, 13.

But I mean, like, was it important to you or.

No, no, no, no.

Cause I have a lot of friends. I have too many jewish friends, if I'm being honest. And they all say it was, like, such a big, integral part of their youth. But I imagine because you're a performer, those are weird for you. Like, that's a harder thing.

By Haftorah. I didn't even, like, learn Hebrew.

You bailed.

I can memorize this.

Was it important for your mom? Was it, like, a big.

Yeah, I think so. I think my grandparents were very religious jews. Like, we'd be in the car, and they'd be playing, like, hebrew music, and I'd be like, can we get some zeppelin on?

Yeah, and then. And then your grandpa's like, you know, they stole. You're like, all right, Grandpa.

So did we. But, you know, no, I never. I always related it more, like, you know, a guy, like, culturally, like, you know, a guy like Leonard Cohn or the way, like, Woody Allen saw New York. That's like, how I. You know, that was your last. And. No, I saw the way he would, you know, represent New York, like, how much he loved it. Like, there's like, a very. There's a lot about, like, jews that's very similar to just being a New Yorker that, like, constant. Just like, can you believe this shit? Like, that's how we all talk. Like, you know, did you hear this happen? Or you complain for, like, 20 minutes and you're like, good day, though. You know, that's something very jewish about that. But that's also, like, the very New York pace where, like, you're in a constant state of irritation, but you're also grateful.

Yeah. Cause it's the best.

I do it all the time where I'm just, like, furious all day. And then, like, right before bed. I'll be like, that was a good day I had today.

But I think that's a comics play too. Comedians in particular, love that kind of vibe of, like, the drama of complaining.

Also, because it leaves good feeling. Yeah, it feels good. Once you're numb and bored and complacent. I feel like the materials dry, so I think being annoyed is actually get, I'm actually getting bits.

Well, it's engaging, right? It's like they always say, my grandfather was obsessed with crosswords and word puzzles and all that. He loved that and numbers and all that stuff. And they say he didn't know at the time, but, like, it's super, super engaging for your brain because it's struggling and it's frustrating. And it's like, the more that your brain has to, like, tinker and figure out. Cause we're, we're creatures that are really trying to analytically figure out our surroundings and how do we, like, how do we make way. And when you become so easily accessible to food at your doorstep and drugs at your doorstep and you don't have to fucking leave, your brain is not engaged. You're just slowly dying. It just goes away.

It's a good point. You feel better, like, going out and grabbing takeout than you do.

Oh, I love going to get it. I want to go. I want to feel it. I want to go. Yeah, I have friends that do that fucking do not leave. They don't want to. They want, they just are like, nah, I'll just get it.

I have a friend I have to, like, force out of the house. And then he's always like, so glad he came out. But he's like, he's just one of those dudes. He just works too much and he's net. He's like, I'm too tired. I'm like, yeah, but this is, you're gonna be old before you know it, and you're not doing shit with your life.

But you gotta go feel it, dude.

You need to do something.

You gotta go.

Because I also feel like it's, man, so bad for you. Ever just not do stuff for a really long time, and then you go out and do stuff and your mind is just, like, flooded with ideas, and you're like, oh, those have been fucking backlogged.

Just sitting there on the show.

It's like the levees and katrina just, like, just comes out. You're like, holy shit.

Thoughts?

Jokes.

George Bush does not care about black people. That will loop in my head for the rest of my life.

That was crazy.

I remember watching that? My dad being like, damn, live, huh? I was like, live.

Mike Myers face, like, guess we're doing this now.

Shrek sitting next to him is Shrek. Future. Shrek being like, please donate. What do you say?

I mean, Kanye's had some stages, huh?

Yeah, he's really gone up and down.

I mean, there was that. There was. There was a Taylor Swift thing. There was so weird. I don't like jews. There's been. There's been a lot of.

And now this. Like, he's in this kind of purgatory, right? It's weird. It's like, he's public. He's out. He's, like, living again, but no one's paying much more.

He, like, tried to get into the Kendrick and Drake, and he didn't let him.

They didn't let him in.

Yeah. He was like, he did a remix to the first future in Kendrick song. He's like, yo, I got you, Kendrick. And then no one. Nobody let him any mind.

It's really interesting. It's kind of like he's living in his ultimate hell. In somebody else's would be great because they're like, okay, finally the attention's not on me every day. I'm sick of the criticism of that. He's so obsessed with the criticism and the attention. This must be hell for him, not getting any love.

Yeah. It's like, literally our generation, in a nutshell, of people that would rather just be posting nonstop and getting hate than just taking a second thinking about it. Like. Like, no, love is what apathy is worse than any hate you could get online.

That's it. So that's that.

That's our generation.

The key to the generation.

Oh, sorry. Haters. Like, that's how they started. Like, oh, sorry if this bothers you. That's how you start a tweet. It's like, maybe you don't have to, like, start shit. I had a guy. This is, like, fucking very. For you. I had a guy. I posted just a picture of me and a friend at a pizza place in New York, and some guy writes underneath, Chicago pizzas better. Fuck you. Fight me. I'm like, I can't just have the pizza I like.

Fine. Where? Yeah, but that's become a. It's become a way for someone to scratch this weird itch. That's all it is. It's just scratching.

Well, it's addictive. I think they get dopamine.

Yeah, it feels good.

And once you do that.

Yeah. And then they're like, all right, back to my job. You don't get a minute of fuck you.

Yeah, it's like, attention, even, like, I guess we just found a way to, like, attention. Good or bad is better than no attention. And it's like, sadly. Sadly. But. And then. But so we. With Kanye. It's weird when it's a guy who is this gifted creator, real guy who really can make incredible music. It's weird when. But we don't know what's going on mentally with him. Like, there's. There's some shit going on. Like, he probably needs help, sort of.

Prescription, any kind of help.

He's gone down a dark path, that kid. Just seems like, imagine splitting custody with that guy. That's got to be stressful. Like, you watch the movie Kramer versus Kramer, you're like, this is fucking.

This is heaven compared to cakewalk.

What Kim Kardashians got to deal with every fucking week.

Kardashian west. The battle, the struggle. By the way, they're making that show right now, this month on Hulu, splitting time like it's a sitcom. Mom, dad's yelling about the jews again.

I just looked it up. There was a show, I forgot it only went one episode in BBC, but it was like a Hitler sitcom.

No way.

It was a neighbor of.

I thought that was a joke. That was.

It made it, like an episode. I can't believe it made it an episode.

But, like, I thought it was a bit. Well, you've seen.

Think about the shit we've pitched that they've passed on and they got that somehow that made it through.

Pile, honey, I'm home.

Pile, honey, I'm home. No way.

Now you hear? It is kind of funny.

That's very funny. Honey, I'm home.

Yeah, they made eight episodes, but seven went unaired.

I wonder if you could find them.

They're in some vault in bb. Actually, no, they're historically really bad at backing up. Like, even, like, 100 or so doctor who episodes are permanently lost. Cause they usually just retape over.

Yeah, they would tape over old tape.

As bad as we are at preserving media in the states, they're even worse.

Yeah, that's. And that's why we left. You couldn't preserve media, could you, britain?

But look, I mean, but then you also think about it. You're like. I mean, people probably thought mel brooks was crazy to do the producers, you, time for hitler is fucking insane. But he stuck the landing on it because it's amazing.

Yeah, but it's made by a jew, so that's different, too.

I don't know.

Was that made by a jew? Who was that? Who made. Heil. Honey, I'm home.

Jeff Atkinson?

I do not think so. He didn't grow up with a lot of Atkinson's, did you?

Any relation to Rowan Atkinson? Maybe. Right?

Yeah, maybe. Then that's actually true.

But there's a way that you could look at, like, springtime for Hitler. There's no way you can interpret that as anything other than the most silly, ridiculous. Like, no nazi look like that. But I could see. See a Nazi potentially being like, oh, look, he's kind of a silly, funny guy. Like, springtime for Hitler is so ridiculous.

You could say the same thing for Taika Waititi's movie. Yeah. Why can't I think of the name of that movie?

Yeah, it was Jojo Rabbit.

Jojo Rabbit. Right. You could really. I did too. But you could say the same thing about it that it was. It's a little. It's laughing. It's laughing at. But there are parts of it that are so, so kind of surreal that you're like, yeah, this is a little supportive. In a strange way. It makes you kind of go, Hitler's kind of fun on this.

But it's different than american history acts. Like some neo Nazis love american history acts or other movies, because they're like, even though the text is anti Nazi, they're still like, look, they're beating up these guys.

That's always gonna happen.

But, like, no Nazi would ever watch the producers and be like, hell, yeah.

I don't know, man. That's ridiculous. That's how America works, though, right? Like, the idea that we. I think we talked about this one time, the idea that most, like, in the nineties world, like gangster's favorite movie, you'd walk into anybody's house and a Scarface poster beyond their wall. And the irony that they didn't understand that was such a fucking cautionary tale. The point was, this is how it all goes down. It ends very badly.

He killed his best friend.

Yes.

And then he fucked this guy's wife, and then he.

And basically killed himself. Basically killed himself.

And.

But people were like, that was glorified in gangster culture. Like Scarface, man. The fucking, man. You're like, that's the worst version. No, that's the opposite. That's what I mean. So sometimes we embrace it when it's so bad.

Now, the most offensive part is Pacino's accent in that movie. It's pretty rough.

Pretty bad.

I love Pacino, but holy shit, that's a weird.

Well, looking back on all his stuff, like, heat is crazy. Like, those choices in heat were fucking weird.

Yeah, very good.

When you see it now, you're like, yeah, I can't believe, like, there wasn't someone behind the camera, like, okay, yeah, sure, do it. Fuck it.

He just recently claimed he wasn't on coke for anything.

Yeah, that's what they're, like, literally, like, this week. That's what they just. I don't buy, but it.

But that would make his choices even crazier if he was doing that.

Maybe that's why his dick still works at 83.

How do you not. He knocked right. He just had a kid, 30 year old. Good for you.

83.

Good for you. He's not gonna be around. That's my presidential theory. He's not gonna see it through. It doesn't fucking matter. That kid will barely get through elementary school. He's out.

I would think of rocks. Bit about De Niro doing that and rock, like, being like, I'm done. I'm not doing it in my seventies. I'm not gonna watch Hannah Montana again. But, yeah, it's fucking weird, man.

It's strange. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's.

It's.

I've never done coke in my life.

No, dude. You know, it's so funny. I've never tried it once. Well, that's only because my dad was an addict. So for me, that was, like, the biggest. Like, no fucking way. But I did a lot of other drugs, unfortunately, or fortunately. It was very fun, but was always the scary one.

I had a high school coach that was, like, Len bias, daryl, all these, like, heart attack. Yeah. All these guys who just died, and he, like, got in my head. Terrifying. Then I knew a kid who fucking killed himself on coke, and I'm like, like, all right. Maybe that gave him the confidence to jumbo out of a 30 story window, and I was like, I shouldn't touch this, probably. So it was just ingrained in my head, but, yeah, also, now. Can you imagine doing fucking coke now? Fentanyl with this? I guess they have testers, but wouldn't you be testers? I call them the openers on the road, but they have, like, a machine. Hey, vita, you try the Gary.

Go for it. Take a bump and let me know.

But I feel like that's.

No, that's a scared. One of the edits. It's. It's one that also, for me, all my life, when we were young, if someone was like, hey, man, someone so is gonna have coke. And it's like, I can't afford coke?

Yeah.

The fuck is wrong with you guys? I'm so broke I can't afford fucking. Coke.

Was like, such a weed was expensive back then.

Yeah, yeah. So I'm like, I'm not gonna.

Illegally, you know. You're getting fucked.

Oh, you're absolutely. Legally.

You're probably like, I. Well, this is the legal amount.

Well, you're getting fucked still, but different.

Yeah.

You know, I mean, now you're getting fucked by a corporation or before you're just getting fucked by a guy who drove a Camaro. That was just a tougher.

Yeah. The most dangerous part of smoking weed growing up was getting into a stranger's car. It wasn't the weed. It was just like, we're going through Central Park. I hope I make it out of here.

And having a conversation with that guy. Yeah. Sitting for a little bit too long in someone's apartment when you're like, all right, man, I gotta get out of here. No, no, let's smoke one more before you go.

And you're like, fuck, yeah, I have.

To chat with this guy for another 35 minutes. I really want to go home. And then I would make up an excuse. I'd be like, fuck, shit, I'm late to pick up. And they're like, oh, really? Like, shit, I'm so sorry, dude, I gotta go.

Yeah, I'm 15. I mean, I'm in an apartment with a bunch of 40 year olds playing Tony Hawk. You're like, holy shit. Maybe I shouldn't smoke. I don't want to end up like this.

Like, somebody's got to change that main menu. I've heard the song Superman 47 times now. You're like, dude, I'm too high to hear that loop again. Please, please turn it the fuck off.

That was a good turn, though.

It was so good.

It was.

Wait, hold on, hold on. Oh, fuck.

Here I am.

Yeah, but who's that? Who's the band?

I'm trying finger.

Was that cold? Finger?

Yeah.

Doing everything I can. I remember that album. It was like. It was like an alien chick, right? It was a sexy alien chick on that Goldfinger album. The good old days. Yeah. I want to say this to you. I love you. I appreciate you. I can't wait to see you again soon. When I come back out to New York, go watch Sam's special. It's out right now on Amazon. Well, we're supposed to say prime right now. We're not gonna say Amazon one time. Well, cuz when I did the movie for Amazon, they were like, stop saying Amazon. Say Prime Video.

Why?

Because it's not on Amazon. It's on Prime Video because they're there. You know how HBO is Max now, right? But Amazon exists as an app to buy shit. And they're like, we're not Amazon or Prime Video. I was like, okay, okay.

Cuz during all think people know that you don't go to, like, the paper towel page to watch my thing, Sam. You say they know it's.

You say Amazon, you say this. You don't think there's someone out there being like, I tried to watch Sam rail, but I bought soap. And I guess I'm just, that's, that's gonna be good enough for me. No, go watch on Amazon.

Yeah, I'm happy with this one.

You know where it is?

I like this one, so hope you watch it now. I'm in the stages of having to rewrite a new fucking act, which, like.

Oh, my God, are you on tour right now?

I'm on tour. And I'll be, geez, I got Miami. I'll be in Miami in August. I'll be in Baltimore area. Timonium is what actually is. And then I'll be all over doing a bunch of casinos with Chrissy d meshes on some of those, too.

Good crew.

Yeah. And then we're, because we're all building back up hours. And then I'm going to Europe, and I'm doing, like, all over Europe, doing London, Amsterdam.

I've never done the european tour, and I want to so bad.

I'm hidden, like, everywhere. So, so I know some people, like, no Italy, no Germany next time. I wanted to.

So Germany's sensitive for sale.

So, no, I want. That was actually the fucked up things. Like, I'm like, I want, I really never been to Berlin. I really wanted to go there.

So it's actually fucking beautiful.

I heard it's gorgeous. So bummed.

It is really, really pretty. Germany is so gorgeous. And also they're, they're nice now. So I'm everywhere.

So just, it's Samuel.com shows and go to samrell.com shows.

Go watch the fucking special. Go see my friend on tour. You're one of the best comics working. I've known you for a long time, and you've always gotten better and better. And it's undeniable at some point you're gonna continue to keep moving forward, and I'll be watching you from my window, drinking coffee as you ascend into the outer spheres.

You're fucking killing me.

Comedy. No, I'm a bum looking at that camera right now. And we end the episode the same way, with one word or one phrase. So whenever you're ready, you end the episode at your leisure. One word or one phrase.

You've changed. July 9, Amazon prime video. In here, we pour.

Whisk, whisk, whisk, whisk, whisk. Oh, that creature in the ginger beer. Sturdy and ginger like vampires. The ginger gene is a curse.

Gingers are beautiful. You owe me dollar. Five for the whiskey, $75 for the horse.

Gingers. Oh, hell no. This whiskey is excellent. Ginger. I like gingers.