What is up, daddy gang? It is your founding father, Alex Cooper, with call her daddy. Daddy.

Daddy.

Daddy. Daddy gang. Welcome back to another episode of call her Daddy. I would say on a weekly basis, I indulge in maybe, maybe a couple glasses of wine, maybe one tequila throughout the course of seven days, okay? But every time I throw an unwell event, the little rager inside of me. The girl who loved four locos back in the day, the girl who didn't even flinch when she would drink straight vodka out of a water bottle in college, she comes back out. She comes back out and she's reborn for about 48 to 64 hours. And then I put her back down and I lay her to rest for the next time that I will let her wake up again. Okay? And this past weekend, she woke up and I went full fucking throttle. I was throwing my 30th birthday party in the Hamptons. And here's the thing. Every single time I go to the Hamptons, it is a shit show in the most beautiful way, because I get in and I get out. I'm not spending all summer there. I'm not even doing weeks there. It is a weekend. And we get out and we go home.

And when I woke up in my house in Los Angeles, still hungover, still sweating, tequila, still recovering, I got an email from my video guy with a link and the subject line of this email read, uncensored Hamptons confessional footage. Enjoy. Now, I set up a cute, innocent confessional, thinking I honestly thought my friends would pop in and say a few words, maybe sing me a cute happy birthday. But as you can imagine, this is not how this story goes. For anyone who wasn't able to make it and was suffering from FOMo, I have got you covered. What I will say, though, daddy gang, is, you know, I'm a podcast girl through and through, and I rarely ask you to do this, but please, for the love of fucking God, watch this episode on video. Like, this is not one to be, like, jamming to in the car. You need to wash this. It is a full visual, glorious experience. Prepare yourselves and get ready to hear from Leah, Miguel, Hallie, Owen, Maria, Noah, Centineo. Daddy Gang is in this episode. And Kiera, who we just signed to unwell, she is the queen of book talk.

She is fucking hilarious. And I am not ready for you to hear her JC Penney story. So, without further ado, daddy Gang, I give you the unwell confessional. Enjoy.

Now I'm ready to get loose. Hello, I'm Kierra. I'm from Houston, Texas. I do book related content. And, yeah, I was in a sorority. So. This unwell lifestyle, this ain't new to me, baby. This ain't new to me. It's true to me.

Hello.

I literally just got here, so we only need a second drink in. But, baby, compared to yesterday, we was about 20 drinks in. And, girl, my confession is actually from last night. And when I tell you clearly, Alex know how to get down. Cause the time was had, we ended up at common ground. Great time. I'm living my best life. I'm like, yeah, I love the Hamptons. I love the Hamptons. I don't know how I got into the car, but all I remember is being in that car, waking up, touching my head, and feeling so damn bald headed. I started looking high and low. I'm looking for my purse. I'm looking for my wig. Apparently, my wig was under the seat. Now shout out to that driver. Cause I hope you didn't say nothing. And if anything, I hope you don't snitch on me. That's my confession. So, basically, I lost my wig, the car, and my lashes. As you can see, I have on mascara. I'm naturally an eyelash extension. Girl, that shit's gone. My nail is chipped. I had a great time from what I can remember and clearly from what we can see.

Hello. I don't have a sugar daddy experience, but I'm always looking. So slide into the DM's po favor. Okay. Where's the craziest place I've had sex? Mom and daddy. Cover your ears, girl. Cover your ass. Oh, girl, I don't know if I can. Is it legal? Oh, no. The crazy. Well, I was younger. This is like college days from what I can think of at the top of my head. Oh, no. Fucking sadness then my job. I'm younger. I'm a more mature woman now. Things have changed. Yeah. That JC penis dressing room a time was had, man. Oh, lord. Back blown out. But, hey, at least we purchased the jeans. My boyfriend did get them jeans, but, yeah, that was one of them crazy times that I don't even got no regrets. But I wouldn't do that now. Don't be doing that now, girl. I feel like I need to go to go to church. Going to repent of my sins. If y'all got holy water, spray something on me. Poor favor. And now I'm just gonna pass it to the next person for their confessional. Hopefully it's not as crazy as mine.

Girl. Well, well, well. Hi. I'm double fisting. Hi. My name is Leah Katab, and I am an unknown amount of drinks in, and I'm feeling ready. And you're on sex hotline. No, I'm kidding. And you're on Leah's channel. My current relationship status is standing in front of me. No, I'm kidding. No, Miguel's standing there. I do. I have a boyfriend.

Ah.

The weirdest date I've ever been on. Let me give you guys a backdrop. This might take a second. Get comfortable. I went on a date. This guy, he asked me out to Nobu, and we went out together. And it was really good. And this is actually fairly recent. Sorry, Miguel, but it was before me met. Anyways, we went to Nobu. He took me out. It was really fun. It was really cute. We had a great time. Whatever. He texted me after. He was like, I really like you, blah, blah, blah. Okay, cool. Fast forward two. He was like, I'm performing at Coachella. You should come. And I was like, that would be so fun. Let's do it. And he invites me to Coachella. And then we go to Coachella. And when I got there, there was like this. There was like. It was a whole house, office, friends were there. I was there as well. And then all of a sudden, I stand in there, and then this girl comes up to him and takes the blunt out of his mouth and starts smoking it with him. And I'm like, okay, interesting. I thought it was his auntie.

Well, it just looked like his auntie. No shade. And then we get in there, and I'm sitting there, and they're like, no, an auntie wouldn't touch him. Like, she starts putting on a very see through top. She starts doing her makeup more, and she doesn't introduce herself to me after I was like, hi, I'm Leah. So nice to meet you. She doesn't talk to me at all. Okay, cool. Anyways, fast forward. Cool. After that. But he's being like. He's like, I'm so happy you're here. You look gorgeous. Blah, blah. I asked my friend, who's also his friend, I'm like, hey, so who's that? And I'm thinking he's. Oh, that's his sister. No weird shit, cuz. Y'all sharing a blunt? I don't smoke. I don't. I'm a very sober queen. Not right now. Well, okay, hold on, hold on. Alcohol? Yes. All of the rest?

Boo.

Say no to drugs. Dare sponsor me. Just kidding. Oh, God, am I bombing this? No. The way they're all sitting. Can we, like, pan the camera. Can we pan the camera the way they're all tuned in? I'm begging. Okay. Anyways, I asked my friend and I'm like, okay, is that your aunt? Is that his auntie? And they were like, no. And I was like, okay, cool. So who is shedden? And they were like, he invited her. And I was like, oh. And then I find out he invited both of us at the same time. And I was like, oh, I'm so good off of that. Like, you can have him. And then that was the last time we spoke. But now he begging for that shit back, obviously. Duh. But I'm good. Anyways, that was my worst first date. And my name is Leah Katev and you're watching unwell. And I'm passing it to the next guest.

Sh. It's my turn on the mic now. Hey, my name's Miguel and I'm on my 123456 7th drink. I'm pretty sure I'm feeling really good. The fact that I've got a mic right now and I'm feeling this good is crazy. The fuck am I doing here? My relationship status. I'm taken. I'm out of the streets. You cannot have me. Ha ha. My confession is. Fuck. What's my confession? The biggest party foul I've ever committed is boom. So I'm in college, right? College is different to your college. My college is before university. So this is just before university. I'm at this house party. Everyone from my school is there. There was this one girl I was interested in. So the party's been good. I've got a couple drinks in me. I've been turning up. I'm with my mandam. I'm with the people. Them, you know, we're having a vibe. We're turning up. We're getting litanous. And then my boys decide, yo, this girl, she's kind of interested in you. You've been interested in her. Let's put you in the room along with each other so you guys can get to know each other. I've been yacked up, bro.

I've got drank in me. Tequila, vodka, Henny, all of that shit. It's in my system. There's a party going on in my bladder right now. And my blood, I can't take it. So she's there. We're on the bed, we're talking. She's next to me. We're talking and shit. She's asking me questions. I'm not processing them questions because my body is fucked right now. I'm trying to keep my shit in. She's jabber, jabber, jabbering. I'm listen, listening. And the alcohol was trying to. Alcohol out on my system in.

So I'm confused why he's speaking while I'm not here.

All right, right. So, boom, this is the. This is the thing.

Come, come. I heard she.

No, yeah, yeah. So this is. This is bad. This is bad. This is worse than what happened.

Fucking. Fucking stuffing.

I can't believe I'm saying this on camera.

Wait.

Give me my cred for being able to say this on camera. Because it's bad. I'm drunk in a house party, and my boys decided to lock me in the fucking room with this one girl that I was interested in at the time. I'm sorry. So she's talking to me, right? I'm fucked up. I'm drunk. I can't hold my liquor in. I don't drink like that. I don't drink. You know, I'm saying, I'm a. I'm a. I'm a sober boy, so, boom, embarrassing. Anyways, so she's talking to me. I'm listening, trying to keep myself composed. I say, yeah. As I say, yeah, I go home, I'm like, nah. I get up, I go to the toilet. I start spewing in the fucking toilet. Me and this girl were in the fucking bedroom for five minutes. I don't even know if it was five minutes. Less than five minutes. I'm throwing up on the toilet. This girl comes in, what the fuck? Anyway. But any leha. Okay. Who the fuck snorted behind the camera blood? Shame on you. Shame on you, brav. Oi. That's how you know it was not meant to be. Because man is talking to this gift.

In front of me, and I.

Fruit. She, you know, it's mad. She threw up in front of me. Let me say that again. She threw up in front of me.

It was a bonding experience.

Do you want to get into that?

No.

Because her one is bad. So the more the story is don't drink if you're trying to get to know a girl, and if you are, listen, if you're trying to wingman your boy, don't put him in a room with a girl when he's fucked up, because that's the worst thing you could ever do. Because I never really spoke to that girl again on the same level because we was heading there and it didn't happen. Thank God it didn't happen, because I never would have met this princess. It never would have worked out anyways. She wasn't my type. She. Look at you pushing my face. What was that? What was that? And on that note, we better go to our room. So see you later.

No, we're not. My best friend is behind the camera.

I don't mind the audience.

I do. Don't listen to him. He doesn't know what he's talking about ever. Only I do.

So relax yourself. Relax. We're passing it over to the next guest.

Why can't you double fist it?

Baby girl, do not say that to me. Next guess. Come over to the couch.

It's always been my fucking dream. No, you should stay. No, I don't know. I don't know what I'm doing. What are we even doing?

Okay.

Hi.

Hi, everyone.

Hi.

Noah and I are.

You're saying hi to them, not me? I'm not everyone.

No, no, I'm saying hi to you.

Hi also.

Okay, so the people who were just on the couch earlier are having sex in the bungalow.

It's kind of hot. Kind of?

No, not Miguel and Leah over here feeling themselves.

I don't even know what's happening.

I don't even know why I'm on this couch. Okay, all right.

Hi, my.

Name.

There is a bed to the left. You two. Yeah, you two go to the left. You go to the left. Okay. Get it? Okay, we are gonna now give you a little ASmr with. And this is actually a controversial topic. Is it Noah Centineo or Noah centennial?

Noah Centineo.

I have always said it right, but to all of our bitches on Instagram saying Noah Centennial, it's Noah Centennial.

Cut that shit out.

Cut that shit.

Read this.

Cardinal.

Hi, my name is Noah. I'm zero. Drinks in and feeling terrified.

Zero.

What is.

Neil, what happened to you?

He said what happened to us.

We were standing up and we were clothed earlier. Now we're naked and fucking.

No, okay, I'm.

Wait, wait, wait.

And by we I mean you and.

Miguel, obviously no one's having sex. Second of all, no one's having sex.

Just like. Like dry hump.

No, no, it wasn't dry humming. Second of all, hello. Third of all, he's so boring I had to join it.

Thank you.

I don't know why he's saying he had zero drinks. I watched him.

I think it was.

I watched him literally drink seven shots, three cocktails.

Talking about yourself, babe, there's.

Three months ago you saw me three months ago.

He threw up before this interview, my care.

I threw up. We agreed we weren't gonna talk about that. My relationship single my current relationship status is single.

Okay.

And my confession is.

Can I pick the one you do?

Yeah. Yeah, yeah, sure.

Fire.

I don't know if I have a story for it.

No, you have weird, fun stories. So the first time I met you, your couch was made for 15 people to sleep at your own home. And I asked you what kind of. Or. Wait. No. We're trying to make you. Branz.

Wait, how did.

I was gonna say what kind of orgies you're after? Cut. Cut.

That was the last episode. No, that was last episode of Confession. Let's go fucking do it.

Come on.

I'm ready.

What do you think?

I'm all wrapped up.

Now.

Go.

Yeah.

Look at Miguel sitting on the bed being like, I have a boner. You just left me. Now you're doing an interview?

I love leaving guys with boners and nothing to do with it.

Go.

And guess what? We can do it better than you guys can do it for us.

Go. Leah. Give him a fucking question.

No.

She don't even want me to talk right now because she knows that's not fucking true. Listen.

Facts.

If anyone's gonna get left to blue balls, it's this one over here.

I've heard you're doing just fine to her, my friend is fulfilled. You're doing a great job, Miguel.

I know.

I've heard great things.

I wanna know this. Just cause I feel like you would have a funny story for this. Have you ever fully fled a hookup? Why?

I got a crazy story, and it's definitely a confession, but it's kinda gnarly. All right. When I was 17 years old, I'm already laughing. I was 17 years old, I was a virgin. And I lost my virginity at 18, by the way. Late bloomer. And at se.

Oh.

Fucking twins. That's very. Okay, that's very demoral. Did I get it? No, I said it wrong. Demure. Very demor.

Very not demure to say demor de moir.

Don't. So, I'm 17 years old, and it's New Year's Eve, and I am. I. I dropped off an ex girlfriend that had come over to hang out with me and family. Why? I don't know. I think I was trying to set her up with my best friend at the time, and she was not taking it. So then it was after New Year's Eve. So we get in an Uber, I take her back to her hotel, I get back in the car, and I start going back to the house that I originally was at. And on the way, I saw a woman standing on the side of the street. I was, by the way, like, 17 and two solo cups of rum down, like, wasted, like, completely gone. And I'm in this truck going down the street. I see her, and she's kind of going like this, like, trying to get the attention. And so I said to the uber driver, I'm like, yo, my man, pull over really quick. Pull over really quick by this woman. And he's like, okay, what am I? Pull over. So he pulls over.

You're 17.

And I put the window down. And I'm like, hey. And before I could say anything, she just goes, are you my ride? And I was like, I can't. You was like, by the way, it's like, 01:00 in the morning, new Year's Eve. And I was like, uh, yeah, I mean, I can be. Where are you going? And she goes, oh, I'm going to Ocean park. And I was like, all right, word. Hop in. That's on the way home. So she gets in the mommy.

Oh, now he's giving free Uber I submission, y'all. You heard it here first.

Noah Centineo gives free uber rides.

Noah is giving free uber rides.

And so she gets in the car. I'm like, what's your name? And she goes, you don't need to know my name.

And I'm not.

I was like, it's giving Noir. Yeah, it's giving something. Something is being given. So she's like, what is your name? And I'm like, my name is David. Which was a lie because she didn't tell me her name. I'm like, all right. I don't even know your name. You don't have to know mine either. I didn't know. I thought that's how I. Like, she's an adult, you know? I was like, is this how we do things? So we pull up to her place. It's, like, beach towny, like, little bungalows. And so we pull up to one of those bungalows, she gets out, and she turns around. I'm like, all right, have a good night. And she goes, you're not coming in. And I was like. And I looked right at the Uber driver, and he looked up in the rear view mirror because, like, he knew I was. And then I looked at him, and I was like. I was like, yeah, all right. And then he turns around like, joe, are you? And I was like, I'm fine, leah.

Did you just say, if you're not going in, I'm going in? That Uber driver's like, my dick is right.

The Uber driver said hello. If you're not going, I am, mama.

Give me that 20%. Five star tip, baby. Let's go.

No, that's right. He said, I'm a deliver. Why am I on this couch? I did my confession. I did Miguel's confession, and now I'm doing fucking Noah's confession.

And now she's done with Noah's confession.

So. So I'm nervous. She opens the front door, she walks in, and immediately on the floor in the living room, I see a Thomas the train carpet. So I'm like, oh, she's. She's with child.

She's with child. She has multiple children.

I hope there's not a child in the place. This is now even weirder. It was already kind of weird, but now it's real and it's getting interesting. She goes, do you want a nightcap? I'm like, no, I've had way too much. And she goes, I'm gonna make you a nightcap. So she made me a gin and tonic, and she forgot to put gin in it. But I'm like, I guess this is what we do as adults. Like, pretend.

We pretend. We lie about our names. We lie about the alcohol in our cups. We just lie.

We lie.

We lie.

So long story short, like, we go into her bedroom and we start talking, and then we start kissing. I just pick her up, and I threw on the bed. Keep in mind, virgin, like, had never done any, like, I, like, have. Like, you know. Yeah. Did things, but never had sex.

We know. At this point, are you at all thinking, like, oh, my God, I'm about to lose my virginity to the woman that I picked up on the side of the road. That's a 30 year old woman that won't tell me her name.

And there's like, this is such a funny story. Like, this is so funny. Oh, my God, look at me. I'm being so funny right now. You know, like, oh, this. What is, like, an older woman. And this is great. And this is actually such a story. And so, like, we start all these things. We started, like, making. And then, like, I kind of get hit. Sorry. With this, like, reason. I don't know where, you know when you're super drunk and then finally, like, reason smacks you in the face. You, like, are like, oh, I'm present now. And I just go, fuck. Maybe I should, like, do a little push up and just, like, see what this person looks like and what's going on. So I push up and I look at her, and I realize she's like, 40 something. Oh, she's a little bit older, which is fine.

Yes, but you're 17. You haven't lost your video.

Not only was I right, not only was I hit with this realization that, like, she was much older and, like, I just got hit with this, the reality of what I was doing. And I went, oh, no, I need to go. So I just went, I have to go. And I got up, and she was like, what? And she grabbed the blanket. She, like, pulled in front of herself. She was like, what are you talking about? And I was like, it's a story. Tell your friends. And I grabbed my stuff, and I ran 3 miles home. Noah, like, 132 o'clock in the morning.

Okay, this is a story that he. So you didn't lose your virginity that night?

No.

You stayed a 17 year old young boy, still with fresh eyes, bushy tailed, and he didn't have sex with the 40 year old woman, but he did save a woman off the street that night.

I did get her home safe.

And this is the story from Noah about how to be a good person.

This is my confession.

We're passing it to the next guest. Let's go.

Okay. Hello, everyone. I'm Marie Georges. I have had about, like, four drinks, plus maybe, like, five shots. And I'm feeling great. I'm feeling fantastic. I'm having so much fun. Got to meet so many girls. I'm loving life right now. I'm from Toronto, Canada. Canadian bitch in the USA. My current relationship status is single. Whatever. And I'm gonna be 30 in, like, a couple days. So let's just not remind me how single I am. My confession is, I like someone who doesn't even know me yet.

Just shh.

Doesn't matter about that. Tell me the time. About how you were fully delusional about a man. How about right now where I feel like the man that doesn't know me is gonna love me? We'll keep it at that. Have you ever tried to really impress someone only for it to be a total flop? Um, no. I'm such a straight shooter in who I am as a person that I've never had to, like, change who I was to try to, like, impress someone. I'm. I'm always been like, if you're gonna like me, you're gonna like all of who I really am. I'm not gonna, like, give you surprises later on. Take it or leave it. That's just how I've always been. Has someone ever told you that they loved you and you didn't? Say it back. No, I mean, I've had people tell me that they're very into me and like, whatever. Maybe they've said, I think the only time. How can I say this nicely? I've had guys confess their love for me and I was not at the same spot as them. And that can get hard. But no, I'm gonna be honest. No, never.

No one has ever said like I love you where I was. Like I don't feel the same. Because I don't think I would ever let a guy feel like they can say that they love me. Cuz I feel like that would be like really leading someone on. I just don't do that. I don't entertain people that I don't give a fuck about. On that note, I love you guys.

Bye.

Hi, I'm Owen Thiel. I am six drinks in woo. And I am feeling really blackout drunk. I should only have one drink. I am a lightweight. So this is not gonna go well. I'm from Los Angeles. Unfortunately, my current relationship status is I'm like basically married. But he won't propose. So if you're watching this, get a ring. Love a diamond. Big one. And my confession is I still have my ex's instagram password. And I do still check the DM's. Ten years with my current boyfriend and I'm still checking my ex's DM's. Keep drinking.

You guys.

Tell me a time about you were fully delusional about a man. Okay. My best friend had a boyfriend who I thought was in love with me. And like, I swore like he was looking at me. Like every time we would go out, he would stare at me in my head. He was infatuated with me, he was obsessed with me. And I had to break it to my best friend that he was probably gay. Cause my best friend was a girl. And so one day I sat her down and I said, I just wanna let you know, Michael is not straight. She said, what do you mean? What have you seen? What's up? And I said, I've experienced it firsthand. He's obsessed with me. He's completely in love with me. And I just needed to tell you now. So you didn't continue on this road. Obviously he was straight and just thought I was weird and thought I was like way too much, too extra so he would look at me as I was telling these insane stories and be like, who the fuck is this? You know what I mean? He wouldn't look at me like he was obsessed with me.

He would look at me like, you're an alien. Go back to. Go back to Mars. And she told him that I told him this. And now they don't speak to me because they think I was, like, trying to steal him, which, by the way, I was. He's so hot. Okay, now I'm gonna pass. I'm so drunk, I'm hearing voices that I can't concentrate. Okay, now I'm gonna pass this to the next. To the.

So drunk.

Now I'm gonna pass this to the next guest.

Cheers.

Hi, my name is Dina.

Hi, my name is Jess. And we have a pretty big confession to spill, if you want to take it away. Dana.

My high school ex boyfriend cheated on me a lot.

It's true. I was his best friend. It's true. I can confirm when he cheated on.

Me, probably the fifth time I made him a Grindr account.

It's true.

And I had to ask you for the email.

I provided the email.

Yes. So sorry.

Sorry for all the men hitting you up.

Hopefully, it subsided by now. And that's my confession.

Cheers.

We're passing it to the next guest.

Hi, my name is Halle Bachelder. I'm about seven drinks in right now, and, guys, I'm feeling fucking fuzzy. I'm feeling warm, and I'm feeling curious. I'm not gonna lie. Okay? I'm from Boston, Massachusetts, but I live in New York right now. My current relationship status is single. So single. Kind of sad. Honestly, the fall is me really lonely. Whatever. Okay, my confession is, last week, I went on a first date, and honestly, we had oysters as the appetizer. So I'm gonna, like, blame the oysters because it's like an aphrodisiac. He fucked me in the ass, I'm not gonna lie. And I liked it. I hope they put this in. Have I ever fucked multiple people in one night? There's so many answers to this question. Yes is the immediate answer. I mean, like, are we talking about threesome production? Wait. In college, there was one night, so I was on, like, the basement floor of my building. That's where I lived. I used to, like, fuck this guy that lives in the basement, but I also fucked this guy, lived on the third floor. And, like, they were friends in the same frat. They found out about each other.

I'm just a girl, guys. I don't know. I don't know what to do. They were both hot. Like, am I gonna say no? I don't know how to say no. I'm working on it. And wait, there was one time where the guy on the third floor came down to the basement and walked in on me and the guy in the basement. Then that's when the whole thing was debunked. It was bad. It was bad for my brand, but also good for the brand at the time. Have I ever dabbled with a sugar daddy? I don't know if he was daddy status. He was like. I mean, he was, like, probably 13 years older than me, but he used to spend like a daddy. Honestly, I don't need men for their money. Like, I come from money, so, like, it, like, doesn't bother me. So, like, when guys, like, think I need them for their fucking bag, I'm like, get. Be fucking frail for a second. I don't need your fucking pockets. He was probably 36. I was 23, which to me was a daddy. But he used to go out to a restaurant. We'd get drinks, say it was like, two margaritas.

He would always be like, should I tip a thou? Should I tip a thou? And I'd be like, yes, tip a thou, and then fuck me sideways. Okay. I have a funny story, actually, about the sugar daddy. So he was in London one night, and he facetimed me. He'd go sit down me for, like, three weeks. So he finally picked up the phone, and I was like, okay, hi. I'm thinking about getting my moves on. And he was like, I'll pay for them. Whatever. I'll vemo you. So him and his best friend Vemo'd me for my tits. They, like, both think they own my tits. Little did they know, my dad and my mom was like, if you pass your real estate licensing exam, like, I had no job at this point, so, like, if you pass your real estate license, you get it. Like, we'll pay for that surgery. Passed it in two weeks. And then I pocketed the money that that guy gave me and then had amazing rack after that. Wait. When I was 15, my mom walked in. I'm even getting fucked in the ass on a pull out bed in Aruba.

Is that real? Can I see that? One trauma, and that's t. Don't cut that. Honestly. So the weirdest thing anyone's asked me to do in bed, he didn't even ask me, honestly. He really wanted to have a threesome with me. I was like, okay. Like, I'm down. Like, I've had threesomes before. Like, I'll do it. This man was fucking me. And then he put on porn on the sonos. Surround sound, so it sounded like 19 bitches were in the room. Like, not even surround sound. Justin is like, specific bedroom. Like, he was like, living in a share house at the time. So, like, with like four other guys. This surround sound was like, in every room of the fucking house. In the bathroom, in the living room, in the kitchen. People were like, cooking, baking. Like, you would hear porn. That's probably the weirdest thing that anyone's. I've let anyone do in the bedroom. Yeah.

Give me the side.

Wait, do you have a good side?

I literally texted you. I'm like, where are you? Halle, I missed you. I couldn't be out there without you. Hello, I'm Maria Georges. Yes, that's about it.

What is your most embarrassing sexual mishap?

What the fuck does that even mean? Like, I don't even get the question. Mishap.

Like, did you fall off the bed? Did you get like, a black eyed.

Swear to God, I've never backflipped where I didn't catch myself.

Well, I just had surgery last week because sexual injury detail. I was having sex with this guy and, like, I also just got my veneers done. So my mouth is like a traumatic place right now. So this guy bit down my lip and, like, you have like, a bunch of saliva glands in your lip that produce saliva. Yeah, he fully collapsed the gland. So, like, my mouth was producing saliva. But I know where to go, so it's like, pooling.

Wait, what? Cuz he bit you so hard you had surgery?

Yeah.

So what'd you do with the guy?

I think he's coming tonight. Have any of your friends ever tried to steal a guy you were talking to? They wouldn't even try to do that.

I actually have a fucking story about this, and I never thought I would tell this story. No, this actually pisses me off. It brings me back to a dark place. Listen to this. You ready for this? So my ex fucking cheats on me, right? And I break up with his ass.

How tall was he?

Fucking fucking 510.

Yeah, that's my point.

But yeah, no, he. He cheat on me, blah, blah. But he was known in Toronto. Oh, fuck, here we go again. The fucking poor guy is gonna get shit on for call her daddy and now shit on for this fucking shit. He basically made a video with the girl that he cheated with. Then this girl comes up to me, she's like, oh, my God, I knew you from your ex. Like, I love you. Like, and was like, supporting me, being like, you're, you know, you're so much better than him. Ba ba. Let's go have drinks. We go have drinks. We became friends. She's, you know, confessing her shit about her ex and like, I'm helping her through her breakup. She hotdeze. She's not bad. Oh, no, bitch. I listen, I call spade a spade, I think. But I'm not gonna say the bitch is ugly. She's not? No, but she's, you know, opening up to me about like, how I'm this amazing girl and, you know, she wants to confide in me about her ex. Oh, you are? And turns out then, okay, ready? This. Are you guys ready for this actually kind of fucked up production.

Are you ready?

She reaches out to me, she goes, I'm going on a trip. But I want to let you know, she literally calls me. She was. I want to let you know I heard that you're might be on this trip, but like, not with us, but he might be there. We might actually hang out. Cuz all friends are mutual friends. I go, okay, go off sis. Go get some free fucking drinks. I don't give a shit. Like, go off, like. Like, use them for what he's worth. Turns out it was a fucking double date trip. She was planned to be there to meet my ex to go on a fucking day. No, it was a fucking double date trip. It was just her. Her friend who was. Who's dating the. My ex's friend and I. Then she was there to meet my ex to be on a double date trip with him. I fucking. If you guys saw the text, we.

Have to kill her whole family.

She pleaded for forgiveness and I said, you. You confided in me about your ex and I was there for you, and you're out here on a trip, fucking mine.

Fucking you.

What?

Like, she what?

I never do that to someone that I hated. Imagine someone that you actually like.

Too much dick out there for. Like, there'd be like, girls, like hot girls arguing over, like, do you want to.

Want to hear something funny?

Okay.

But then I heard a story that so apparently my ex farted in the bed with her and she cried and was like, why would you fart? And he's like, bro, I'm just fucking farting with the fuck. And apparently fought over a fart. I swear to God, bro, I wish I was making this shit up. This is what I thought I heard about what their fights were about, about farting. And anyways, I wish I could make this up. I wish. I wish this was a joke because now I sound like an idiot for a guy. For me dating a guy who farts.

In bed, he's five'ten. We have to go back to that.

Let's just have a moment of silence for Halle and Maria, the duo. We didn't know we needed the duo, that maybe together they could ruin. Well, they're already ruining lives in a beautiful way separately. So coming together, it's like men be fucking terrified when they're together. I love them so much. We had truly the best time partying together. That was overall just like a wild watching experience and seeing it all back. I'm not going to lie, I was a part of some of them, as you saw. But a lot of these confessionals, like, I wasn't in the room for like Kiera's JC Penney story. I will never drive past another department store specifically. Wait, is JCPenney even still in business? I don't know. Regardless, Kira, you're a living legende and I love you. So casual queen Leah, just like, yeah. So my first date is at a Coachella thing with a performer. Casual. We're all jealous of you. I love you, Miguel. He's top tier comedy. So thank you for showing up, Miguel, and giving us a fabulous story. That was phenomenal. Also, Leah and Miguel, you guys are so fucking cute. Watching you all weekend, I was like, keep doing what you're doing, sweetie.

Can we talk about Noah Centineo for a second? Coming out of the woodwork, coming to an unwell event. I saw all of your comments in my DM's being like, where has he been? He's home. He was on caller daddy this week. And we love you, Noah. Thank you for coming on. Owen. Owen, my friend Owen. Let me just say I had the best time with you and your boyfriend this weekend, but I am so fucking jealous of you. You being the nosy, beautiful sleuth that you are. I would do the same thing if I had my ex's passwords. Okay? And so we're all jealous of you. Love you and Daddy Gangdeh coming in hot, popping in for a little caller daddy episode. This was truly so fun to relive and I'm so happy that we tried this new format. I'm obsessed with reality tv, so I thought it was fun and I'm happy that I got to. I'm happy I got to share a little taste of this party with you guys. Summer is officially coming to an end and I really wouldn't have wanted to close out any other way and with any other people.

So with that said, I guess I will leave you with this. I wonder where the next unwell event will be. Stay tuned. And maybe I'll see you there. See you fuckers next Wednesday. Love you. Bye.