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What's up? This is Mike Diamond, Mike D, and I feel optimistically uncertain about being Tonan O'Brien's friend.

I'm Adam Horowitz, a. K. A. Ad Rock of the BC Boys, and I feel... I don't know. I feel like I would be bullshitting if I said... I mean, we've met before, but I certainly would like to be, but I'm not yet friends with Conan O'Brien.

You're saying you're okay with the idea of us being friends?

I mean, yeah, I have enough friends?

Fall is here, hear the yell, back to school, ring the bell, brand new shoes, walking loose, climb the fence, books and pens.

I can tell that we are going to be friends.

I can tell that we are going to be friends.

Hey there. Welcome to Conor O'Brien, Needs a friend. Joined by my fellow attorney, Sona O'Session. Hello. That's how an attorney sounds. That was my attorney voice. Very good. Hello, yes. Okay. Objection. Just caused me. No. That's a judge. Sustained. Okay. No. Overrul, sir. All right. You got it. No one knows the law like you, Sona. Of course, Matt Gourley. Hello, ladies and gentlemen of the jury. Okay. All right. Object. Object. I'm a caricature. Now, I don't know much about such silly things, but I know an honest man when I see one. It's clear, Sona, you don't know what a lawyer is. I don't. Yeah. And you, your only exposure is through cartoons, I guess. That's most things. Yeah. Maybe one children's production of 12 angry men. But who am I to talk? I've lived off of caricatures for many years. Do you think you'd be a good lawyer? Do I? Yeah. This is a true story. I had an uncle who always wanted me to be a lawyer because he was a lawyer, and he was always saying, You'd be a great lawyer. And you should do- And your mom's a lawyer. And my mom's a lawyer.

And so he was saying, You should be a lawyer all the time. And he was pushing me. And then I graduate college. I start becoming a comedy writer. I'm actually starting to have success at it. He would still say, You should be a lawyer. I would think, I'm actually this is doing okay. Then I'm working on Saturday Night Live. Then I'm getting on camera a little bit, and he's still saying, You should be a lawyer. Then I'm on the Simpsons, and I'd see him, and he'd still bring it up. Then I get the late night show, and I swear to God, he called the head because he had gone to the same college as the head of NBC. He suddenly didn't know him, and they were years apart, but he suddenly got his number and he called him, and he said, What is all this about Konan doing this late night show? That guy should be a lawyer. Oh, my God. No, he didn't. He did. No, he didn't. I got a call from Bob Wright, who runs NBC for General Electric. Oh, my God. He was laughing. He was like, This guy just got on the phone and yelled at me and said, Konan should be a lawyer.

' I'm like, Yeah, I know. You should have told him he should have been a comedian. Yeah, you should have a late night show. But his argument was, if you're a lawyer, you get to be your own director and your own actor and your own script. I was like, No, no, no. Trust me, very few people have late night shows.

Did he ever come around?

I don't think so. I think it It was always a mystery to him. To be fair, I just came from people that knew nothing about show business and didn't care about show business. I think it just felt like, What the hell is he doing? What is this nonsense? It's, knock it off. Go to BC law and be a lawyer. I'm sure there are some people out there that would say that would have been a better use of my time. But yeah, that was interesting.

Did you ever want to be a lawyer?

No. No. I always thought I- I'm sorry. What the fuck?

I would have done a really great job of being a lawyer.

No, you couldn't do that.

Why do you think you could be a lawyer? She's a debate champion. I couldn't be?

I didn't say I could be a lawyer. I said that someone else wanted me to be a lawyer. You should not be a lawyer.

I could be a lawyer. You wouldn't show up.

Your client would be sitting there. How fiercely have I fought traffic tickets? Oh, sure. That's just a small glimpse. I'll give her that. She's amazing. She used to miss whole days at work because she was in traffic court, and she would admit upfront, Oh, yeah, no. I was doing 95 miles an hour in a children's parking lot in an elementary school, and they caught me. Children's parking You know, like a children's house. Elementary school parking lot, whatever. Then you'd go there and you'd say all this bullshit to the judge, and you'd get off. I would win. Yes.

That's what we need. We need the Ws, and I would bring the Ws.

The wins. The wins. I'd be one of those billboard lawyers and everybody would- Like Sweet James. Yeah. Okay. Like Jacob Emrammi. But here's the problem. I think you're very motivated when someone's done you wrong, the man has given you a ticket Then that gets your Romanian blood boiling. Okay? True? Because you are Romanian. Yeah, that's true. Okay, let's not take that too far. Me, Romanian? Don't label me. But it does. I've seen you, when you see red, you go into this this special mode where you have superpowers. I'm talking about you represent someone else, and you're supposed to be there at eight o'clock in the morning and have done all the preparation. But somebody took some gummies and somebody kept the judge waiting. I disagree. Someone when the judge said, Ms. Mouvsisi, and you're like, Get off my ass, Judge, and shove that gavel where the sun don't shine. How's your Romanian blood doing now? It's really boiling right now. I think I would crush it out. You You haven't seen me on jury duty.

Do you know how good I am at jury duty? Wait, that's a totally different thing.

That's a totally different thing. Shut up now. I object. You're out of order. I object. You're out of order. I'm in an attemptive court. Ms. Mouvsessian, stop telling people to shut up in the courtroom. I had notes. I had mental notes for the people who were the two lawyers. I was like, I could do what they're doing. Are you kidding? I know, but then you'd have to go do it. All I'm saying is that you're a free spirit, and once there's a task given to you, there's part of you that rebels. You're just angry. That's why you work with me.

I I was just trying to think right now, if I was in serious legal trouble, which of you two assholes I'd want to represent me? Obviously.

I'm taking his fame out of it. Eduardo is pointing to me. First of all, no, don't take my Fame out of it. I want to be able to stand up and go, Ladies and gentlemen, I'll be representing the defense. Of course, you all know me from my 30 years experience. You should be a lawyer. I thought you said you're not famous in this scenario. No, I said I insist on being famous. No, you got to do it not famous. Before we examine the evidence, let's look at my 10th anniversary special. Jury, yay. This stuff holds up. Yay. The judge, I find you guilty of being hilarious. Thank you. I will fight for you. Yes. Let's move it on. Let's move on to the show. My guests today are the founding members of the Grammy Award-winning rap hip hop group Beastie Boys. They recently released a 30th anniversary edition of their classic album, Ill Communication. I'm absolutely thrilled they are here today. Adam Adrock, or if it's Michael, Mike D. Diamond. Welcome. Yeah. You're okay with the idea of us being friends.

Is that bad?

It's like I'm trying to sell you a Kia.

I have a Kia.

A used Kia that's not in great shape. I have a used Kia that's not in great shape. I don't have a Kia. You have any? Okay. But that would mean you wouldn't want another one.

No. See, that's the problem. I'm trying to go a little higher.

How did I know you had a Kia?

I just knew it. I just like, Dirty Kia. When you say dirty, is there just a lot of crud inside the car?

It's so gross.

Can I interject here? Sure, Mike.

Please. You don't even have to ask. It's disgusting.

It's literally disgusting. Like, old, caked up like old cereal and stuff inside.

I don't eat cereal in my car. I'm not an animal.

What is all that food crap? There's other food, but I don't like...

I don't like to go to my car with a bowl of cereal.

Guys, I was just back in Boston, and my older brother Neil, I went for a ride in his car. It's the dirtiest car I've seen. It had just crud caked on the inside. At one point, there's a little panel that if you push, it opens up. It's not the glove compartment, but it's just for, I don't know, just some tic-tacs, whatever you might want. I pushed on it, opened up maybe 19 packets of ketchup from a fast food restaurant. I said, What the fuck? He went, It's nice. If you need ketchup, it's right there. They're free when you go through a drive-through. Is this the animal you are?

Can we move on from the How's your day so far?

I'm not so good. Can't complain. Yeah, got some ketchup. We have more important things. We have more important things to talk We have met. You guys performed on my show in the past. You did an interview. I remember bumping into you a couple of times in New York. I was always super happy because I was a big fan of the music, but I also always found you guys, Beastie Boys, really funny. That was in the music, it was in the videos, and I always thought that that was integral to what you were doing. Am I correct about that?

Yeah. We talk about it, and I feel like actually it's the thing that... I don't know. This is maybe dangerous territory here, but I think there's a lot of our audience that doesn't get that or hasn't at different points, different junctures over time.

I don't see how that's possible because from the very beginning, when you guys first hit the scene, I remember thinking, They're funny. Like your early videos, and this is years before I got a late night show, I remember thinking, These are funny guys. They're New York funny. Am I wrong? It feels very New York.

Well, yeah, we're from New York. We're from New York.

That's all the time we have. This is called Where People are From. We've established that. We're good at this. All I do is geo-locate people, and then we wrap it up. But in New York, we have it. Thanks, guys. Okay. Clay, send us off to the printer. No problem. The guy who doesn't know how our podcast works.

We met in high school. We were friends. We've just been friends this whole time. What do you do with your friends? You just You're supposed to just have fun. When we were in high school making music, it was fun. We figured we'd just go with that.

Yeah, but could I add on?

You don't need to ask permission. You can just go.

I do because Hey, may I interject? You don't understand. Otherwise, he's going to be like, Mike, I was speaking here. So by me asking permission, I'm taking that away from happening. Maybe I do need new friends.

That's why I'm here. Because Mike is a pain in the air.

Oh, my God. I asked to do this by myself.

No, but I think we grew up at a certain time also in New York, where it was like, A, we come... Adam and I, anyway, Yauk was an only child, but we come from family. I think there's this necessity when you're at a New York City table, culturally Jewish table, where everybody is speaking on top of each other. You have to figure out how to be funny to survive. Otherwise, Yeah, it's just your way of dealing with the world. Then I think, I don't know, I remember from a really young age, when we first became friends, we all had Monty Python's Big Red Book, which was blue. The cover was blue. That was as important to us as any punk rock record or something. You know what I mean? That was a very high... That was just something that was important. It was important to us to aspire to be funny like that.

I always started out getting interested in music through the Beatles as a kid, but I always remembered and then became crazily into their allure and learning everything about them. The thing I always remember is whenever you asked George Martin or something when he first met the Beatles, what grabbed you about them? He never said it was the music. He said it was their sense of humor. I always thought, that's not possible. It must have been the music. No, the music was okay. It was their sense of humor. Then, of course, they were integrated. It's part of the same... I don't know. It's part of the language of the music music is the comedy, to me anyway.

No, I agree. The Beatles were huge Peter Seller. They were huge fans of The Goon Show.

Goon Show, yeah.

You could see once you geek out enough and you do the nerd searches of The Goon Show on YouTube and stuff, and you realize a lot of their humor, they were students of that, for sure, or contemporaries.

You guys have always said Adam started the band. He initiated it. How did he initiate Was he the one that said, We could do this?

I wasn't there. I don't know.

I was. Were you ever in the Beastie Boys?

Yeah. Yeah, briefly.

You could do videos. Oh, I'll vouch.

I'll vouch for you. You were there '88 to '89, I remember. You were replaced by a lookalike. It was a solid year.

It was like Fast and Furious 7.

Adam, before he was in Beastie Boys, he was in a band called The Young and the Useless. Before there was Beastie Boys, I was in this band called The Young Aborigines, which I guess is probably a name that would get us canceled. Is that an appropriation? Just keep going. I'm just saying, you need to be honest about these things. Full disclosure, cultural appropriation.

Again, I wasn't there.

I was in a band called Cultural Appropriation.

That would be good. We killed it. Anyway, Young Out Rich is... Yauk was our everything. He was our road crew tourman. He was the only one who knew actually how to make things work, honestly. We played two gigs in one night, and then we broke up. It was John Berry, who was the first guitar player before Adam from Beastie Boys, and myself, and Kate Schelenbach, who was the original drummer for Beastie Boys. She played percussion in Young Out Bridges, and I played drums. But then Yauk really… It's not even so much he wanted to be in that band, but he wanted to be in the band. So he was like, All right, we're starting a new band. So then it was John, myself, and him, and then Kate. And then I was the one who I drew the short straw, and so I had to sing, which I really didn't want to do.

Wait, the short straw is the singer?

In my case, I definitely would have way rather, at that time, would have rather played drums. That would have been my ideal, but it didn't work out that way. Wasn't it to be?

No.

Anyway, but Yauk was. I mean, he was the visionary in terms of like, We're going to do this, and Adam and I could go back and forth in many... We could talk story for hours about how Yauk was a master manifester. I mean, at that age, I definitely didn't know what the word manifest meant, but he was really someone who was just fucking just completely determined to do something and would get it done, I think beyond probably our, I don't know. We're a little more like, Oh, yeah, seems like a good idea. We'll do it.

Or just like, you're with your friends, you're like, Oh, we should do this thing. And nobody does anything after just, We should do this thing, but then he'd show up with a camera and film. Like, Oh, I guess we're actually going to do the thing that we're talking about.

Thank you. Yeah. It's like that thing of you're with your friends and they're like, How many times you're with your friends and somebody says the crazy idea? And you're like, Yeah, okay. That just becomes one of the thousand crazy ideas that never, ever happens.

99.9% of kids your age say, We should do this thing, and then they smoke more weed and they don't do anything.

I think that you're... I don't know. I was going to go somewhere with that. Go ahead. You have to single out the potheads. I know.

Why are you attacking the potheads? I don't know.

I feel like math kids, You're right. They're not always doing the stuff. You're right. They're not always doing the crazy ideas.

You know what?

You're right. I apologize. The potheads are smoking the pot. The math kids are doing the math.

I think you're right, and I'd like to apologize. Okay. I'm also apologizing I'm sorry. Why is he looking at you? Why is he looking at you? I'm apologizing to Sona because she's- I partake. You don't just partake. I'm on apologetic. I get things done. You'll probably fucked up now. You have twins. I do. They're so young. But they're also why I do it, so it's okay.

It's fine.

I had the chance to have a really nice, lovely conversation with Adam on the Warner Brothers lot. I want to say it was about a year before he passed away. He was there directing, I believe, a video, some project. I could tell he wasn't well, but I was coming out of the commissary. He was going into the commissary, and we just had this nice bonding conversation. Wasn't that long, but it was when we just first showed up at the Warner Brothers lot to do that iteration of whatever the hell we were doing. And seemed like an absolutely lovely guy, but it's always been clear to me that you call him the manifester or the catalyst to the person who's... You've got all the ingredients, you just need someone to create the friction or get the thing moving. And it felt like you guys were saying that may have been Adam.

Yeah, but it's honestly beyond that because it really was like he was the guy who would have the craziest fucking idea that anybody would possibly have in the room. And then exactly what Adam said, then show up the next day with the equipment that would make it all possible. Then you're doing it.

We didn't do all of the stuff that he was saying, though.

Thankfully, yeah.

He wanted to do a tour underwater. Luckily, that never...

How was that going to work?

Yeah, I know. He really, really...

Yeah, there thought about it, had drawings and everything. There was a Lost City of Atlantis fascination that went on for a while.

Actually, actually.

Did he believe the Lost City of Atlantis existed?

No, it wasn't about Atlantis.

Oh, I see. Okay. It's just this idea of having this underwater, presenting we are doing on tour in an underwater environment. Granted, I would give it to him. Had we done it, nobody else has ever done it prior. There's probably a lot of good reasons for that.

Logistically, it's just a lot.

There's no oxygen down there.

No, with a tank, and then you have to wrap at the same time with the oxygen. Yeah. I call me old-fashioned, call me old-fashioned, but I think when I was a kid, I was told like, water, electricity.

You got to keep it too separated. That's never been proven. Yeah. Never been proven. It's just more bullshit. Yeah. I always appreciated that the music is clearly was so solid and so fantastic. I want to talk about Ill Communication because when that came out, it was such a soundtrack. I just listened to it a lot at the time, and it's one of those records, albums that becomes the soundtrack for that time in your life, which is, I think, a hard thing to achieve. But I think everyone who was who was my age or obviously younger who heard that at the time was like, Okay, these are the songs that imprint on us at that time. I remember it, I guess I would have been in New York at the time, and I know that you guys, you came from New York. We've talked about that. You've said before that the New Yorker grew up in, like the Boston I grew up in, there's no iPhone. You're not listening to your music that way. This is probably much more true in New York it was in Boston, music's coming at you from all these different places out on the street, and that that was instrumental, no pun intended, to how you guys formed.

Yeah. I mean, I don't think our story is that unique. I feel like that's how things, especially bands, start. You're into this thing and you're hearing things, and you find friends that are into the same thing, and you move along that way. But something special about being in New York is that you do hear it. We talked about a lot. You walk down the street just getting from here to there, you're hearing music from the pizza place. You're hearing somebody drives by with the radio or whatever. You're hearing all this music. I feel like our time was an interesting time to grow up in the mid '70s to hear radio. It was a great time for radio. We had the one station would play David Bowie and the stylistics and whatever. It'd be like everything would be playing. And so all of those influences. And in New York, you'd go uptown, you hear like when we were little kids, we'd hear salsa and Boogaloo coming from radios and punk rock up from the East Side or whatever. You know what I mean? All these different sounds. And it formed us as kids growing up. And so we took that with us.

And I think us as friends, and like we all do as friends, it's not just about the one thing. We all talk about the TV show. So we write rap lyrics. So of course, we're going to talk about Chef Boyardee, and we're going to talk about the odd couple, and we're going to talk about all this dumb stuff. I mean, not dumb, pretty dumb, but it was important to us.

Well, it's genius when you look back at it now.

We all are like, Oh my God, the odd couple is one of the best shows ever created. But I appreciate it, too, because there were so many... You drop in so many things. You had a... Because I think we're a similar vintage, I remembered when you guys rhymed Rod Carou, and I'm like, Who's talking about Rod Carou anymore? A pinch on the neck of Mr. Spock. There's all this stuff that was evocative of my growing up in the '70s and your respect for it. I remember, too, when I would go to New York, this is something that was also true, is that the times I lived there, when you got in a cab, you were listening to the music that that cab driver was listening to, which often was not top 10. So anytime you enter to space, you were inundated. People talk about how we're siloed now. Everyone's listening to the music that they exactly want to hear through their iPods. Airpods. Airpods. Yeah. Ear goggles. Ipods. Yes. Okay. I'm sorry. You don't have to exacerbate it. Sorry. You could just help me- You said iPods.

You meant Airpods.

Yes. All right. This is why we don't get anything from Apple. This is why they don't send me in a shit.

The ear thing is.

I mispronounce Ferrari all the time. But anyway, I think you're part of a stew. You have no control over it.

I think New York was unique. I only know New York, but I do think New York because you had music blasting at you from all sides and all different kinds of music. I have to think that at that time, that was different than Boston or Rhode Island or anywhere else on the East Coast and beyond. New York really was the place that exists probably in the whole globe at that time where you had all this different music music happening at the same time, all being blasted at you. Then I think also, then it's an interesting thing, what you brought up. I don't know. I guess it's maybe just that we all grew up in the '70s. As kids, we were left alone, literally left alone. And there were only three channels or four or five channels. It was a huge deal. I remember when my parents got the cable box, that was huge.

Oh, that was going into hyper-warp.

Yeah, Being able to have the box where I could turn beyond the three channels or four channels or whatever, that was huge. And being able to watch the Knicks and Rangers games.

Back when there were three channels, there's ABC, CBS, NBC. There's two UHF stations. I've mentioned this before, but we would watch what came in, meaning what did we have good reception on. Once it was a Catholic Mass, but the picture was really good. So my brothers and I, it's just like... Because we don't have the palate that people I have today. I remember just thinking like, Well, this is not what we want to watch.

But God- Is it better or worse than F Troop? Do you know what I mean? We're just watching. It's just the electricity. It's just all we need is the electricity.

Don't diss F Troop.

Rat Patrol. I don't know any... Mr. Ed, I don't know any random show. You know what I mean? No offense.

I'm so happy you mentioned Rat Patrol.

I don't know.

Three Nazis fighting three American GIs in the desert, and it's only the same six. Every fucking episode. That's the show? That's the show. They're just driving around in the desert shooting each other.

What was the Colonel Clink show? That's Hogan's Heroes. Hogan's Heroes. I think that that's pretty insane. Every day after school, we'd watch Hogan's Heroes, which is like this- It's funny shit. It's a comedy.

A comedy about... They said it was a POW camp. A POW camp. Not a concentration camp, a POW camp. You're right. That's why it was funny. Jesus Christ.

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You couldn't have known the scale of the success when you come out, first album, you're touring with Madonna, 1985. If you're going to tour with Madonna, 1985, I'm thinking is the time. You just must have been in the center of an insane whirlwind. You couldn't have calculated that.

It was pretty crazy for her.

Think about it. She talks about it. She never got over it.

Think about it.

Yeah.

But it was, though, I think, where we were on that tour, and it was a huge deal and totally absurd that we got asked to do that tour. That's a bit of a story unto itself, which Adam could tell, or I could tell, but either us could tell it. Or you just read the book and it's in there.

Which would make what we're doing now completely irrelevant. What if this whole thing was just read the book and then we just end it? No. You don't have to go into it.

I'm just saying- No. My point is actually that she booked a tour and she was playing like, theaters. And by the time the tour was actually happening, she was so beyond selling out a theater in terms of stature. She literally went, I think, by the tour. Before the tour was finished, I think she was on the cover of Time magazine or something. So it was like she was on her way to being a cultural phenomenon, but then she really was one by the end of that tour.

Is it a coincidence that we were on that tour? I mean, I don't know.

All I'm saying is before you guys signed up, she's in theaters, small theaters.

We used to play at the same clubs in New York. Yeah, I'm just saying. No one ever talks about that part of the story.

You're right. In the podcast era, this is compelling. I'm calling her information.

Well, actually, it is because she's flounding around. She's in theaters. It's going nowhere. You add the mixture, the key element of the Beastie Boys. Suddenly, she's on the cover of Time magazine, which at that moment was a big deal. It was a huge deal. Of course, now no one knows what you're talking about.

You don't know who Joe Franklin is, do you?

Yes, I do.

We were on the Joe Franklin show in '83.

Joe Franklin, just for our listeners.

How do you explain Joe Franklin?

Joe Franklin, a guy who never should have had a show, but magically did. He name dropped everybody in show business. He had a small, it almost would today look like a cable access show. He sat there and his show was on for 40 years.

For ever. Yeah, and he had a real studio in New York. You'd go and it was very, I guess, you're more of a student than I am of this stuff, but it's like it's Vodvillian. Yes.

A lot of his references would go over the head of anybody here. But Joe Franklin is an iconic New work institution. I can't imagine the Beasty Boys on the Joe Franklin show.

It was so great. Then at the end, he was like, Well, Phyllis, whatever he called it, he was like, I see big things happening to you since you are going to be on this show. He was basically like, You're giving the Joe Franklin bump. It was pretty great. It was pretty great. You're like, I don't know. Next thing you know.

Yeah, let me give a tour of Madonna.

What you're saying, Joe Franklin blesses you, then you guys-Rock and roll Hall of Fame. Bless Madonna, and then Rock and Roll Hall Fame. Yeah.

That's all true. You're right. All it goes back to Joe Franklin.

You guys have seven platinum selling albums, and that's thanks to a man named Joe Franklin.

What's with the other ones that aren't platinum? Because we made more than seven records.

I have bad news for you. I know. Good question, Adam. No, I don't. I did.

I mean, everyone's got a couple of duds. Everyone. I like them.

I love that your mind works that way because there's Exactly. It's what didn't work. There's seven that did, but what didn't work. Yeah, that's exactly how mine works.

I didn't know a music insider. Would you like some musical insider information? Yes, I would. We were at our studio here in California, and I was smoking the pot. This was a long time ago. Oh, God. I'm trying to discourage kids from doing this. We had a gold record on the wall. It was our record, Paul's Boutique. I was looking at it and I could see it has our label, and I could see that it has whatever, nine songs on the one side. I was looking at the actual gold record, and it only had four songs on it. I was like, Wait, you guys. We opened it and we put the record on a record player. A gold record.

Well, it was- I mean, broke the glass. Sure, broke it open. Broke the glass and took the record out of the thing.

It was somebody doing piano versions of Barry Manalove, like Feelings. It was just some other shit.

When someone has a gold record, they just take any record.

Apparently. Spray pages. I don't care about anybody else.

But I'm telling you.

I'd like to think that for Barbara Streisand, Donna Summer, a real mega star, it was actually their record. But in our case, It was somebody that was like- I'm saying this is a documentary.

Whoever's record that was, I'm just talking.

That's a free lead to a quiz show investigation because I think all gold records need to be examined. They all need to be recalled, and you need to go to every… You should check them out because it's probably not their record. If it's not on a massive scale, recount. It's a recount.

We need a recall of all gold and platinum plaques.

Maybe the most important thing facing America right now, at least for the next couple of months. All our energy should go into it.

Well, I think, Garner, you could be a big part of it. Next time, say, Lady Gaga is here. You could really urge her to do the same flavor.

You guys have come to the right place. I have incredible of the power in the music industry.

I didn't know you could play those.

I just thought they were decorative.

I didn't know either. I didn't know. I hadn't thought about it.

It turned out it basically seemed like, I guess, it was somebody's record. There was a spray painted gold or something. I don't know.

Because who would break the glass and put it on a turntable? They weren't counting on you guys. You were the X-Factor.

We were the slews that uncovered this incredible crime ring.

This could be an action movie with John Seymour. I'm just saying.

John Seena and the Rock.

The Rock breaks the glass.

We can't afford the Rock.

No, one of them. We can't do both.

Just stick to John Seena. We can get John Seena because he does commercials.

Jason Mamoa?

Too much.

Oh, all right. But how about this? Jason Statham is the bad guy who makes the plaques.

This is way too hot for me right now.

I love it. I want in on this, and I'd like to be a producer, but also I'd like to be in the film.

Can I Let's just say this now that we're in Hollywood, California? Anybody that makes action movies, I just want to be in the background during an action scene. I want to get pushed into a thing of fruit. That's what I just want to be in a movie where they're chasing- Why a thing of fruit? Why It pushes me into a fruit cart.

Why fruit? I think Adam Ad Rock would like to be pushed into fruit in the background of a- But wait a minute.

Fruit, is that a safe landing? What is the thing?

It's just always the thing where people are walking, they're like, Oh, and the car comes in, they get pushed in the thing of fruit.

There's always the chase scene that goes through like the hotel kitchen secret back entrance.

This was my coffee reference to cafe.

I'll see that that is done.

I'll see that that happens. Just the listeners.

That and please Yeah. Help us uncover this platinum plaque.

Gold.

Controversy.

It wasn't platinum in the story.

It wasn't. You're right. It was gold. I'm sorry.

Stickler for the details.

I'm going to say probably the same for the platinum.

Yeah. Who knows? Maybe it's a status thing. Gold, you're like, eh.

Just spray paint that. That album by the Parker family.

Platinum, maybe they had a better eye for detail.

Guys, you moved to LA. What year do you move to LA? I'm going to get this thing back on track.

We came out here to record Paul's Boutique because we were working with these producers called the Dust Brothers, who were from out here. Then we'd had this whole falling out with Russell Simmons and Def Jam, and we just wanted to get away from the the New York scene that we were in. We were coming out here to record that album.

Now, did you have, because I'll admit to having an attitude a bit about coming to LA. Did you have an attitude about LA?

Yeah, I definitely had an attitude, but then- I think I still do.

Because I'm not good about driving. Are you good about actually driving to all this stuff?

I'm one of the best drivers in the world.

But aside from the drive, do you actually make the effort? Do you go downtown to the Arts district?

Oh, downtown? Oh, God, no. No, I live in bubble. That's my point.

It's like LA, it's all- It's my house, and then there's a frozen yogurt place six minutes away, and I have my playlist, and that's it, right, Sona?

Yeah, you don't like to leave. I've never seen the sun.

So fro-yo, that's it.

No, I do try. One of the things that was good for me is a bunch of years ago when I started doing live sets in preparation for something, just going to these weird theaters that I didn't know about, dynasty type, where it hotel, places downtown. Then I got into a thing where a couple of friends of mine and I decided, let's just eat at diners and restaurants that were established before we were born, which was 1963. We just ended up finding all these places that had been in, and they had to be in continuous operation. We'd find these weird places to eat in downtown LA that had sawdust on the floor that the cops in the 1940s used to frequent. Then I started to really appreciate there's tons of amazing stuff in LA, but it didn't come naturally.

I have a lot of things that I wish I should have written them down.

I wish it was a sandwich place with the O'Heeff.

I'm wondering, was your diner thing a specific dish or was it just find the rest of the- No, not a specific dish.

Find a place that was in my friend's as Rodman and Greg and I would say, it has got to be in... It's got to have been- Big Rod? Not Big Rod. Roddy? No, not Big Rod. I've seen his ride. It's fine. Why did I go to a dick joke? Yes. I'll tell you why. I have two moves.

It's dick joke, and they're sitting on marijuana.

I'm not the professional. That's the two.

That's it. That's all I got.

If you look at my milieu, my ouvra, that's all there is.

All right, so it's just about the diner and the thing before. Okay, do you know what the Mele Miche is? Is that what it's called?

Mele Miche is what you're trying to say.

You're the best driver in the world. I went to Italy this summer, a little vacation. I asked Michael Dimon. I said, What do you think of Bologna? He's like, I went through there on the Mele Miche, whatever. I had to Google it because I didn't know what the hell he was talking about. Mike, go.

I luck into things in my life. One of the things I have locked into- You're here, aren't you?

Yeah, I'm here. See?

High five.

Or at joke?

One of the things I got asked to do was this classic, this rally race that runs every year in Italy and has since basically the birth of the automobile. So you did that? So I did that. I had an incredible dinner in Bologna. How good was the food in Bologna? Ten out of ten.

Ten out of ten.

Was it Italian food?

So much Italian food? Oh, my God. There's Italian food everywhere.

I just be funny. I just would have liked it if it wasn't Italian.

I did get Chinese one night. We did have Chinese one night.

And?

And, that's too much.

Were you a Chinese one night in Bologna?

We were just rolling the dice. I don't know. Switch it up. We'd been there for three weeks. It was like, Can I have Chinese food?

I didn't see that, but still, I mean, that's a high-risk maneuver.

Adam, you've been interested in acting. I would say when I first would watch the videos, I thought there was almost like a cross in the road where you could have, it could be music, but you very much seem like a comedic actor, performer that felt like that was in your bones. Almost like a dead-end kids thing. I don't know if you know that.

A lot of people want me to go solo, for one, which is a side note. I couldn't do that to them.

Do you still have the letters?

Yeah. Wallpaper. Yeah, that's what I thought I would do when I was a kid. I wanted to be an actor. Then I did a couple of things. I hate the hours. I don't know what it's like for comedy, I mean, but acting itself is a hassle.

You're not going to talk about Ronald?

Well, we can. I feel like that's your opportunity to jump in if you want.

All right. Adam had a very great role in a great TV show with an esteemed actor, Edward Woodward. The show is called The Equalizer, long before Denzel Washington discovered said property.

Right. I remember this TV show.

Yeah. Then Adam played a Rich kid gone bad. We were all what? How old were we? 17 or something? Yeah. 16, 17. The highlight of the whole show was in Busting the Drug Crime Ring. Edward Woodward takes this silver chain, I think it was silver, from around his neck, and he throws it around the villain and lassoes him with his necklace.

Like Wonder Woman.

Yeah, it was a very Wonder Woman-like act.

The episode is called Mama's Boy, and I was Mama's Boy. You were Ronald. My first line, professional acting line, there's kids that want to get into the back room and I go, Yo, chill. That was my first thing that I did. At the end, the guy has a sword and the equalizer comes in. He's like, Oh, you caught me red-handed. Throws at him and the sword gets flying.

Anyways, that's where the necklace goes.

I don't know.

But you had a rubber-face, comedian-I could have been.

There's so many things I could have done. I mean, I still could. Are you offering me a job?

Yes, I am.

I'm over in Hollywood. Should I have a show? What? I want to know, like stand-up?

No, I don't think it's stand-up. I think it's… But it's in acting. Like a show. It's in acting. That's the problem. That's what you don't like. You don't want the hours. That suck. Yeah. You got to stick around. You got to hang around. You got to stay in your trailer. Someone knocks on the door and says it's going to be another two hours. That's not for you.

No, I get tired. You know?

Well, there's a bed in the trailer.

I know, but then you got to wake up. It's just a lot. It's a lot. It's a lot of hard work. It's really hard work. Mike, no?

No, I agree. A lot of work. But I'm going to also say stand up, not for you. Because stand up It was really a lot of work. You have to write your bits. You have to keep coming up with new bits and then keep trying out the bits.

I'm going to say you have to leave your house. That part sucks. Yeah.

You wanted something where you stay in your house and you sleep most of the time.

I'd like it.

Okay, I can help you. I can figure this out. Does it feel to you guys now that you're looking back...

Rubberface?

Yeah. He had come around.

Yeah, what is rubber?

The way you can bend your face in this great way. It reminded me of, why am I blanking on his name, that fantastic actor from the Dead End Kids? Satch? Yeah, Satch, but who played him?

Okay, I see.

Gorsey?

Leo Gorsey. No, no, Leo Gorsey. Not Leo Gorsey. The guy who's not Leo Gorsey. Yeah, I know who you're talking about. I'll think of it. But anyway, I swear to God, you were channeling him sometimes.

We actually might- Am I right? An old friend of mine, Max Perlik, was obsessed with the Dead End Kids, and we used to talk about it a lot.

Yeah, Leo Gorsy.

He was the main guy. Leo Gorsy was the ring leader.

Then there was, Help me. Help me somebody. They're on it. I see it.

Three of us are googling, frantically googling right now. Yeah.

Okay. All right.

I'm not the lead guy. I'm like the goofy sidekick.

I don't know. I swear to God, I got a dead-end kids vibe the first time I saw you and in the different videos. I just thought like, okay, that's a possible avenue for this gentleman. Clearly, what you chose was spectacular.

We are lucky it worked out. Yeah. Hunt Hall?

Hunt Hall.

Hunt Hall.

Hunt Hall.

You got a Hunt Hall vibe. I mean that as a great compliment because I think he's one of the all-time comedy greats. There you go. Thank you.

I did have something I wanted to say to go back to what you wanted to say, which was something on topic. You When you're talking about the comedy aspect of our band and stuff, and we talked about it. It's like when we would write lyrics and we'd write our rimes, one of the most important things was to say something that would make the other two laugh, right? Or the other two to be like, Oh, I mentioned Rod Carou, and they'd be like, That would get something inspired, whatever. But the main thing was to make each other laugh. We put out a record, people seemed to respond to that. It's like anything in life, you get a response and you just go with that thing. Yes.

That was our writing room, right? We'd just sit around with our spiral notebooks. Sometimes the composition books, the bound ones.

Just loose paper.

But anyway, that was the biggest... That was the most nerve-wracking thing was getting the approval of these two guys, Adam and R. A. P. Yauk, in the room of either the laugh or the, Oh, that shit is good. That was the thing. After that, it didn't really matter.

It's so funny because to think about you guys, the three of you sitting there with composition books, Lose Sleep, whatever, working it out makes perfect sense to me as someone who's been in not that... It's a similar process, but in a different world, different mind shaft. But it makes perfect sense to me, but it also seems absurd. Of course, you'd have to do that. Of course, you'd have to around and figure this out, writing it down. To me, the ingredient that I think the magical ingredient that you guys had was it always was clear to me that you were having fun, that there was something really joyous about the music, the process, three friends doing this together, making each other laugh, and getting to do this on a grand scale. That felt like the magic elixir to the whole thing.

It didn't have to have a job. It's fucking awesome. Yeah.

But you know, There are so many groups where they managed to lose that. There are so many groups that managed to, after the initial success, they lose sight of it and it becomes a job. I feel like Beastie Boys, that never happened.

No, I agree. I mean, there were compromises we'd have to make. Everybody has to make them in life. Oh, really? Yeah.

Do you want to…

This is news.

This is news to me.

This is news to you, Adam. Adam's never compromised, but I I mean, we're both wearing the same clothes.

You're saying that I chose.

Anyway, I think you said it, though, very well. I think we're both super grateful of the fact that we got to basically just do what we always did. We would just get together in a room with each other and try to make each other laugh. But somehow it operated on this big scale. It's this thing of like... So that's what I mean of compromise. It's like, yeah, of course, we would be like, okay, you want that to be the single on the album? We don't ever want to listen to it, but fine. If that's what you think people are going to listen to, fine.

It's funny because just looking at the video for Intergalactic Planetary or Sabotec montage. I just see, and actually, almost every video I can think of you guys made, I wish I was there because it looks like you're having a really good time.

We were basically got- Screwing around.

Really, really fun.

That comes through. To me, that's the secret sauce, and it is hard to sustain. I mean, as you say, I'm sure there are bumps on the road or compromises here and there, but it never looked that way from my vantage point.

Well, apparently, those records that turned platinum. That we found out today.

It was those two.

Yeah. Who cares? Because they're not really your records anyway. That's true.

I don't know. We're spoken word records. I don't know what happens. We got very lucky. We just happened to be friends that just wanted to hang out, which we would do when we weren't recording. We'd always just be together anyways when we didn't have to.

I don't know.

We got lucky. I was friends with my friends, worked with my friends. Yeah.

But no, I think it is unusual. We prioritized being friends. I mean, I guess I'm friends or I know of other bands that are of our similar age that are still going, whatever, but everybody's on their own tour bus.

Yes, they're not talking.

Whatever. How is it not talking?

That's strong. Do you want to say names? They speak through lawyers. They hate each other.

No, I'm not even saying hate each other. They're not doing the tour to hang out with each other.

That's what I was going to say. Soda has gone flat. We need to fizz. We need to fizz. Like a flat soda. It's good if your stomach's upset. Ginger ale, it's flat. Really?

I didn't know that. I didn't know that. Hold on, I thought the effervescence is good for your tummy.

I don't want to talk about this anymore. You said something controversial and you just want to glaze over it. I want to shut this down because I realized I think I made a mistake and I just want to shut it down.

No, the ginger ale Well, it's real, though. I only know that because my mom told me. That's what my mom told me. Yeah, my mom wasn't a doctor, though.

My mother was not a doctor either, yet she operated on many of your brain.

My mother was Irish, though.

Mine, too.

So maybe that's what it is.

So you're saying as an ancient- Are you a mix then?

I think safely, everybody in this room could say we are. Yeah?

Yeah, we're pretty mixed up. Not me.

I am 100%, 100.000% Irish.

Really? No Portuguese?

No. No Portuguese. Why? Of the one ingredient missing, why the Portuguese?

Boston, New England, a lot of Portuguese.

No, but we were in Ireland bouncing around. Not whatever. I don't want to... It started with flat soda. Guys, I blame you. It's your dynamic that has ruined what could have been, I think, one of the greatest podcasts ever recorded. But no, Mele Mece. What the fuck? Where are we now?

I feel like that's what it's going to say on my tombstone now. My D, Mele Mece. Mele Mece.

Does Mele Mece actually mean anything?

No, I don't think so. Why did it get us back here? I don't think so.

I brought us back here. It's Mele, and then M-I-G-L-I-A, it means thousand miles. Mele, yeah. Mele, me- You don't have to lean that from the mic. You don't have to actually suck away.

Jesus Christ.

Not a good mic person. I've always had a memory because you guys have that line about never rock the mic with the pantyhose. When I was on Late Night, there was a guy. I could see all those years, I could see a band getting set up, and that Lyric was always in my head. There was a band setting up, which I'll go on name just because I don't think anyone remembers them, but they had a hit that week. They were setting up, and we could watch them prepare on camera because the cameras were just on throughout 30 Rock. I'm getting ready for the show doing my stuff, and I see this guy getting ready. Then I see him driving. I see him tying panties and bras to his mic stand. I go downstairs, and I go in, and I say to the guy, You got to take those off. You might stand. He said, But this is our act. I said, If that's your act, you have no act. Oh, man. But we did it because I remembered your guys' lyrics.

Is that Panty Hose? Is it Panty Hose?

It wasn't Panty Hose, but I take those down.

You're passively, aggressively blaming that action on us, basically.

I'm saying you were responsible for this. Listen, they weren't going anywhere.

Also, he was at a hardware store two weeks later. Their families remember them. Their friends remember them.

No, they were all taken away because that's how bad the band was.

Also, to be clear, but the lyrics is about the… This is not Panty Hose on our mics that we're using now, but it's a technical term pop filter.

I misheard your lyrics, took it out on a guy who was just trying to make it on a late night appearance, and now they're all gone.

I'm backing you. They're doing it all wrong. There's no pop filter aspect. That's some tchatchkees he's putting on his mic stand. It's disgraceful.

It was Steven Tyler's shit, and it had to stop.

I mean, it's Steven Tyler, at least it's Steven Tyler.

He's supposed to have the scarfs. Aerosmith? People know Aerosmith.

I know. They did go on to have quite a lot of success. Yeah.

It was Aerosmith that I- Do you think Aerosmith were on Joe Franklin?

Is that Conan O'Brien bump?

Wait, hold on. Aerosmith could have been on Joe Franklin.

They had to have been on Joe Franklin in '72.

Everybody was on Joe Franklin. I was not on Joe Franklin, but we had Joe Franklin on my show in '93. Really? Yeah, or '94. That's pretty cool. I think I sat in a hot tub with him. It's possible.

In a hot tub.

I'm going to ask listeners- Was he fully clothed or not? Well, that's- That's your question. I don't want to talk about it. He said he was- We're setting it down. We're shutting it down. I want to congratulate you both on this incredible run.

Of being old.

No, of just making it to this podcast. Of all the things you've achieved, you could argue this is the acme of your career.

It's a bookend, Joe Franklin.

Not without, I don't want to get whatever sappy or anything, but when you go back and listen to the music, one of you is not here. Is it a joyous thing for you to hear Adam when you're listening to that music now? Is it ever rough to listen to him or has enough time gone by where it's all good?

Well, I'd say A, we probably didn't. Neither of us listen to, not to burst the bubble. Well, we don't listen to our... We're not going to listen. I mean, you go back and watch an old episode of your show or The Simpson. That's all I do.

At night, I wear a tattered wedding dress and just watch in my mansion. No, I don't.

Yeah, we're shocking. We're not the audience for our own music. But no, I don't know. I think it's all the above. I think enough time has gone. There was definitely a period of time where I couldn't even open up a computer music file, something that we are working on because I would just get too sad. The process would bring me right back to making... Because we really worked with Adam up to very close to the very, very end because that's what made him happy. Anyway, I feel like that time has worked its way through. Then there's times I'll hear something and be like, Oh, yeah. The rest is when you... Because now I think once in a while, our things will get licensed to... I don't know. We'll give a sync license to Mario Brothers or something. You'll be on an airplane or something, and you'll have forgotten, or at least at my point of age I'll have forgotten that we've licensed that song, and then the thing will come on in the airplane. It's actually nice.

I mean, Beasty Boys music in a good way is it's out there. You're going to hear it, it's You don't have to go looking for it to hear it in the best way. I'm just curious if that... When you hear your own music, is it evocative of anything, or do you just think like, Yep, that was then, this is now?

Well, two things. For me, I feel very similar. It was very hard at first because not only did we record all the music together with Adam, but we were also best friends for decades, and so we were together every day. When you lose a friend like that, it's really hard. Not everybody has a friend who's a musician whose voice you hear every day. It was hard. It's definitely less shitty now. But the thing about us hearing our music, for me, hearing the music, the whole thing is weird. Do you know what I mean? That anybody likes our band that we've played at Madison Square Garden or that we have platinum records that people want to listen to.

The whole platinum records that are not our records. Multiple platinum records.

The whole thing is weird. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. When you hear it in a movie or you hear it from a car or something, it's very weird. Still, I don't think it'll always be weird.

I think that's healthy because it is miraculous. Anything like that is miraculous. To get to a point where it's like, But of course, for we are, the beasty places is like, that's.

We also not like, we don't know how to make songs. That's the other thing. We don't know how to craft a perfect song and write a good melody that brings you in with the pre-chorus into the chorus with the Vamp and the thing. We don't actually know how to do that.

What you're saying, Adam, is you might have been a potential Hunts Hall, but no.

You were doing this whole time and it worked out.

But you were no Linda Perry.

I am Hunts Hall, not Linda Perry.

Well, congrats on the 30th anniversary. Yes.

Wait, no, I have a question, though. You're not allowed to ask me questions.

That's not how this works.

Yeah, go ahead. No, I think it's funny. What Adam is saying, I really think did resonate with all three of us when Jacques was alive, of just that we felt like, How does this work? That we're just basically making these inside jokes and that actually other people get let in. It's miraculous that other people could even appreciate them. But When you're crafting a bit on whatever level, whether you're writing for somebody else or your own. I don't craft anything. But anyway, yeah. All right.

But no, but- Writing.

But no. But just do you feel the same way that like, Oh, this is just something we thought was funny to us? I can't believe that just going out on there and people think it's funny.

Most of my career has been, all of my career, I think, has been me thinking of things that I think might make one of my other comedy people laugh. Then later on, someone's talking to you about it because they saw it on television or it meant something to them, and I still find that crazy. It's just we're all getting away with highway robbery. Just we're having fun and making things that delight ourselves and then it's a thing. And so it's nice. I think I'll always be more fascinated by your side of the business by music because I try to I try to understand it, but I don't. It's not in me. I like to play it. I like to play at it. But to create music on the level that you guys did is mysterious to me and really endlessly fascinating. Every comedian I know secretly wishes that they were in a group and they were making music and playing Madison Square Garden.

No, but there is a huge comedy music Yes. Crossover appreciation. When that last video that we did that Yauk directed for make some noise, and we had... For some reason, you weren't in it, but we had basically every- Sounds like you were close, but not actually in the video.

We had every comedian alive was in the commissary.

It was I remember me insinuating- I don't mean that as a shot.

No, I didn't mean it.

I think it was shot on the Warner Brothers lot, and I'm talking. I was talking to Yalc, and it would have been so easy for him to say, Hey, Konan, do you want to You got five minutes? I think he had a camera rolling.

I remember him pushing me out of the way of the camera.

He actively avoided asking you to be in it. He leaned against me to push me out of the way of the camera. Oh, no.

Yeah, he was like, Oh, you know Will Farrell? He was like, You know Will Farrell, right? Yeah. He just happens to be here. Yeah. He's not.

No, he wanted my Rolodex. That's what he wanted. No, there is a funny crossover. When I would see you guys, I would think, Oh, to make music that everyone wants to sing along to, but also get to be funny at the same time as you guys were. I was like, That'd be fun. But now I'm here with you, Sona. I'm sorry. Yeah. No, I love it. Okay, that's nice. This is fun. Not you, specifically. Oh, this. But I love the process. That's okay. Guys, I'm going to wrap it up just because I'm not getting paid. It has been 30 years- Where are the sponsorship breaks? Where are the- We don't do here. I won't have...

That's dirty linen. Where's the ads for the additional marijuana and stuff? We used to have really fun ads, and then this is a crazy humblebrag, but at the beginning, and then this thing got big where the ads now are all for legitimate boring companies.

But it used to be for fracture prints, which turned photographs into glass. I had more fun doing those ads. Then it became, Oh, American Express. You're That's no fun. Magoosh. Magoosh was fun. Yeah. Please, I don't want to waste their time.

What's Magoosh?

I don't really remember what it was, but the name of the company was Magoosh, and you just kept screaming. Okay, please. Now you're... Please, we don't want them to get into the Magoosh thing.

Guys, I- You can't call me a Magoosh. I'm a magoosh, you're a Magoosh.

I don't remember what Magoosh did. Gentlemen, I thank you for being here. It was really nice having you, and I wish you both well. Please come back if you ever can.Thank you. Because you're super smart, funny, gifted people, and it's nice to hang with you, and I appreciate it.Thank.

You.thank you.

Like I said before, we don't have jobs, so we're around.

You're welcome to work here if you like.

Well, let's not get crazy. It's just nice to be here.

Yeah, I mean, that would ruin everything. Then that would be a job. I mean.

Conan O'Brien needs a friend. With Conan O'Brien, Sonum of Cessian and Matt Gourly. Produced by me, Matt Gourly. Executive produced by Adam Sacks, Jeff Ross, and nick Leal. Theme song by the White Stripes. Incidental music by Jimmy Vivino. Take it away, Jimmy. Our supervising producer is Aaron Blair, and our Associate Talent producer is Jennifer Samples. Engineering and Mixing by Eduardo Perez and Brenda Burns. Additional production support by Mars Melnik. Talent Booking by Paula Davis, Gina Batista, and Brit Kahn.

You can rate and review show on Apple podcasts, and you might find your review read on a future episode. Got a question for Konan?

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