The last time I went to the optometrist, I brought my contacts with me to put them in afterwards, and the optometrist looked at it and they're like, They don't even make these anymore.

You're trying to gaslight them. Do you change your contacts all the time? Every day. These were the first contacts ever produced. Do you think that that's a problem?

Wait, that's really gross, you guys. Thank you. And really bad for you.

Can I tell you why I justify it? Okay. It has no bearings on anything. My sister, who's a doctor, does it, too. But she's an OB-GYN. What does a vagina doctor have to do with your eyes?

A vagina doctor can do anything.

Vaginas can do anything. Feminism.

Wait, your sister's an OB-GYN? Correct. My OB-GYN died. I need one. Oh, my God.

Do you want my...

I could FaceTime and hold the phone. She lives somewhere else. Kentucky. I don't think I want to fly to Kentucky to get my hoohah checked.

I could just look at and describe it to her in great detail.

I'm okay.

Why?