Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

That feels so good. Well, it's Friday, so you know what that means. Let's welcome tonight's guest. He's engaged, which means soon he'll be getting back a second ring. Actor, writer, and comedian Jamie Lissow. She's so blunt, you can light her up and smoke her. Co-host of the Bottom Line on Fox Business, Jamie Victawel. Chances are your Uncle Pete pays for pictures of her feet. New York Times best-selling author and Fox news contributor, Kat Tiff. And he puts free buffets out of business. New York Times best-selling author, comedian and former NWA world champion, Taurus.

Thank you. All right.

Before we get to some news stories, let's do this. It's Leftovers, where I read the jokes we didn't news this week, and as always, it's my first time reading them. So if they suck, we'll force Joe Mackey to have unprotected sex with an ostrich. As if protected sex would somehow be better. Speaking of, today Today is National Endangered Species Day. It's the day we celebrate those poor unfortunate creatures who won't be around much longer. Speaking of President Biden, he's scheduled to give a commencement speech at Morehouse College on Sunday, and officials are already preparing for disruptions and delays, but not from student protestors, but from the speaker, crapping his pants and shouting at dead people. According to a new study, spending just 67 minutes outdoors can refresh your mental health, which explains President Biden's new office. There's a rumor that Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck are getting a divorce. And this is weird. Ben is already seeking in custody of her ass. Liam Neeson and Sharon Stone are calling for Kevin Spacey to be uncanceled, saying, Our industry needs him. For once, Spacey was the one who was touched. Stormy Daniels husband says the couple is prepared to leave the United States if Trump wins the trial.

Which is no surprise to Stormy. She's used to men pulling out. But Stormy changed her mind when she heard there might be a hung jury. Chelsea Handler says she'd like to have sex with Robert De Niro, although she worries that like his movies, he probably takes three hours to finish. What are you booing for? Or you're ooing.

Like on the set of Three's Company.

Early this morning, pro golfer Scottie Scheffler was arrested by police after attempting to drive around an accident to get into the PGA course. In his defense, he got his driving tips from Tiger. What the hell? Magician David Copperfield has been accused by 16 women of sexual misconduct. The alleged victim said they were in a car with him, and when he touched their leg, they turned into a motel.

Solid.

At this point, I needed that applause. Pizza Hut is now offering a cheeseburger melt, where instead of a bun, a cheeseburger is served on a thin and crispy pizza crust. It's available in three styles: Buffalo, chicken, pepperoni lovers, and simply, the Bayhar. The Eurovision Song Contest has been won by a non-binary rapper from Switzerland. So leave it to the Swiss not to pick aside. A Major League soccer game was interrupted when a racoon ran onto the field and avoided capture for 161 seconds. Officials are calling it the most thrilling 161 51 seconds in soccer history. A National Institute of Health official finally admits what everyone knew, that they did fund gain of function research in Wuhan. Prompting Chris Christie to ask, Does that mean I can go back to eating bats? Rosie O'Donnell reportedly sent a text to Michael Cohen Someone saying, breathe, relax. You got this. I love you. Which is the same thing she says to her proctologist. I wouldn't want that job, or would I? To the news. His testimony tanked because he got pranked. So the case against Trump is falling apart like Nancy Pelosi's face in direct sunlight. Yesterday, under cross-examination, Trump's attorney accused Michael Cohen of lying about a crucial phone call that was sold as the direct link between the former President and the Stormy Daniels payoff.

So let me get this straight. Michael Cohen lied? What are the odds? That's like finding out Jesse Waters shaves his back. Instead, Trump's team says it was a conversation about a freaking crank call. It's confusing, so let me paint the picture for you. In 2016, Cohen got a prank call from a 14-year-old kid. Cohen then texted Trump's bodyguard about it. Who told him to call him? So Cohen rings the bodyguard and they chat for 96 seconds. Trump's lawyer says Cohen whined mostly about the annoying Brad on the call. But Cohen says he talked about the porn payoff, too. But like Jesse's new book, no one was buying it. You know it's bad when even MSNBC and CNN are making sense. It was like a crescendo because the drama of the moment was so clear to everybody in the room.

Do you have doubts that that conversation happened the way Michael Cohen testified on his direct examination?

Absolutely. I think it's devastating for Michael Cohen's credibility on this. I mean, in this one particular topic.

I don't think I've ever seen a star cooperating witness get his knees chopped out quite as clearly and dramatically as what just happened with Michael Cohen.

That makes the district attorney's office look sloppy, in addition to making Michael Cohen seem like a self-assured, either fabricator, liar, or forgetful person. It cast doubt on the veracity of a ton of his testimony. Oh, Wow. Who would have predicted that Cohen's entire case against Trump would rest on a crank phone call? But hey, maybe the court should call up Prince Albert. Oh, wait, he's currently in a can. Well, Well, there's always Mike Hunt. The idea that somehow this piece of evidence, a 96-second phone call about a teen crank collar would devastate the credibility of Michael Cohen. Think about that. It's like an unpaid parking ticket devastating the credibility of O. J. Simpson. It's like one fart destroying the sex appeal of Gerard Nadler.

Is that glossy?

I love how surprised the media is that this case may be full of crap. It's like going into a Port Authority restroom at 1:00 AM and surprise, there's not an attendant in a tux handing you breath mints. It's like going into Larry Cudlow's bedroom and shocked that there's a mirror on the ceiling. Think about this case at its most basic level. They brought in a porn star and a convicted perjurer to convict Trump of a crime they have yet to actually define. Sure, it's a humiliating day for the prosecution, but it's a stain on our entire legal system. This case never would have been brought if it was anyone but Trump. But their truly shameful behavior isn't from the prosecution, but the media who cheered it on. They partnered up with the most corrupt entities simply to destroy what they see as a common enemy that's embraced by half the country. These media assholes make queers for Palestine seem logical. No one... What you're doing there? No one trusts them anymore. That's why so many are losing money, which is why the next chapter in the story of Legacy Media will be Chapter 11. All right.

Here we are. Jamie, we all know that you're so lonely. You are grateful when you get a prank phone call. What do you make of this whole new development? You've been watching the trial.

Yeah, a lot of time, even telemarketers, I'm like, Don't hang up. Yeah, I have been following this trial since you started your monolog and a lot of stuff. You know what I take issue? I take issue with Anderson. I like what he said, but he said it ruins his credibility on this topic. On this topic. Which that's not what credibility means. If you're dishonest on one topic, your credibility is that now means, can we trust you on other things? I thought they were trying to even give him a little leeway there where he didn't deserve. I just feel bad. This trust is over. It should be over. We should save our money and resource. I just feel bad. This is just something I would never have to... I will never have to pay a girl hush money. Every single time. Every time I've ever slept with a girl, right after she goes, No one can find out about this.

Yeah, I guess the secret is to be really bad at it.

Yes, it's quite a savings. Yes.

Dagen, I was thinking about this. I wonder if this crank call or realizes that he might have just made the most impactful crank call in history. I don't think there's ever been a crank call that had any consequence other than upsetting a senior citizen or pissing off a guy who manages a deli.

I want to meet this individual.

I'm assuming- He was 14 back then, so he's probably like 22 now, maybe.

Legal age. I did the math before the show started. I consider myself an authority on arrogant, lion, grifty, skeevbag, bitch boys. Not the prank collar, I mean, Michael Cohen, the big, swinging dipstick who thought he was going to get a cabinet position but was going to demand the secret service deal with the 14-year-old prank collar. You know this 96-second phone call with Keith Schill, the bodyguard, was all about the prank collar. You have to stop this guy from calling me and asking me where Dick Gazzinha is.

Who is Dick Gazzinha?

I don't know who's Dick Gizinha is. Who? Where is he? You know the whole 90 seconds with this circle of No.

But the thing is, it's like Tyra mentioned this before yesterday, that Maybe it was more than just a crank-yanking. Maybe he was yanking his crank to the crank-yanker.

I mean, let's... Oh, man. I just What? As a bodyguard, we get called for everything. But I have never, ever met a bodyguard who was like, Man, my client called me, had a prank collar. I told him to press star 67 find a little bastard. This doesn't happen. He called up and he's like, I might have sent something to someone that was... That was what, boss? Fourteen. Yeah, you need to call somebody else. Click. That's exactly what that was. Nobody calls over a prank collar. It's still early. We'll find out. But yeah, what did they say on the phone that got you so upset? Or was it their mom that answered when you called? Yeah. Come on.

I hate it when the mom picks up. I want the grandmother.

When mom answers the phone, the dick-gazinya part, it's not so much fun anymore, is it?

Kat, have you ever been prank-called? You're too young to have a prank phone call, right? Because you can't call. You can't do crank calls anymore. It doesn't exist. People know who's calling.

I prank called people before when I was a kid. But I do just want to put something you said in your monolog that I didn't love, which, as you said a porn star and a purger. I think that putting porn stars and Michael Cohen in the same category is an unnecessary besmirchment of porn stars. Yeah, that is true. Many, many porn stars, I'm sure, have much stronger value systems than this smarmy, lying man. Yes. I mean, he's a perjurer, and they're like, Oh, wait, he lied? Oh, yeah, he's a perjurer. Then also this narrative of him, to Tyris' point, this guy who's this brave man speaking truth against this immense insurmountable power. That also breaks down when you realize he's calling Secret Service about a 14-year-old boy. It's not exactly like a David and Goliath situation there.

You know what he probably wanted? I was thinking about this, that he wanted somebody to get the phone number. He didn't know where the call was coming from, so he probably called them because you know how cops and people they can get, they can run. That might have been part of it, but it is pretty funny, though.

You have to admit. You couldn't handle a 14-year-old boy crank-calling you on your own? Yeah.

That's why I keep him in the trunk.

But alive.

Sometimes. Hey, Sean Hannity here. Hey, click here to subscribe to Fox News' YouTube page and catch our hottest interviews and most compelling analysis. You will not get it anywhere else.