Today, I'm asking you a question that will determine where you are in the next six months of your life. And it's a powerful question. And I want to remind you, if you have not downloaded the free workbook right here that goes with this workshop we're doing today, I want you to go to melrobbins. Com/makithappen. Get your hands on this workbook because we are going to dig deep into this question. What do you want to make happen in the next six of your life. And I keep saying that time is going to pass, that I'm recording this, and it's April here in the United States. We're a third of the way through the year already. And I want you to truly just think about how much time has gone by so fast. It just seems like yesterday that it was New Year's. And the fact is, six months, it is going to just pass in the blink of an eye. When I think about the next six months, holy cow, my son, he's going to graduate from high school. Do you know how fast that time is going to go? We're going to fly through the spring.

Graduation is going to be here. And then we're going to be into the summer. And next thing you know, I'm going to look up and it's going to be fall, and we're going to be dropping him off at college. And wherever it is that you're watching this right now or you're listening to my words, just take a minute and think about the next six months. In fact, close your eyes if you can. And time travel with me six months from now, and imagine what you want your life to look like. For me, when I time travel ahead six months from right now, it's October. I'm turning 56. Chris and I will be empty nest sisters. One of our daughters will have moved to New York. The other one will be out in Los Angeles. Our son will be off at college. Where will you be? Six months from now, what's it feel like in your day-to-day life? What's happening in your career? How have your relationships or Have your friendships changed? Are you making more money? Has your health changed? Are you happier? Where are you? Did you move? I really want you to stop and visualize it.

What do you want to make happen in the next six months of your life? What do you want it to feel like? And as you really start to turn that over in your mind, I'm going to share with you some of the things that come to mind for me. And as I'm sharing the things that I see when I time travel forward, and I allow I allow myself to imagine life six months from now, and I think about, What do I want to make happen? I want you to continue to be in your own life six months from now. And in the workbook, which helps you dive deep into this question, you're going to see that there are five categories that define your life that will help you consider what do you want to make happen in your life in the next six months. And these, by the way, are the same five categories that you used when we did the best year planning workshop, because these are the categories that make up your whole life. And those categories are health and wellness. What do you want to make happen as it relates to your health and wellness in the next six months?

Second category, career, money, school. What do you want to make happen? You may be starting a new school. You may be starting a new career. Has your business taken off? Third category, relationships, love, friendship. What's going on in that area of your life six months from now? Happiness. I love this category because it's like hobbies and how you feel and your daily habits and what it's like at your home. Are you happier? God, I hope you're happier. And the final category is you really sit and contemplate that question, What do I want to make happen in the next six months of my life? Purpose, spirituality, meaning. Just really allow yourself to travel ahead. Here's a couple of things that jump out for me when I think about six months from now, and it's October, and I'm 56, and Chris and I are empty nesters. So in the area of happiness, that one jumped out first. For me, when I go ahead six months, I immediately started to think about my home, probably because I said the word empty nester, right? And as I'm walking around my home with Chris, and it's just us and the two dogs, something funny popped into my mind.

And this is one of the categories that you will be led through in your workbook to go deeper and journal on. But here's what jumped out for me with happiness. I live in Southern Vermont, and we have lived in this house that we have renovated, and I just love this place, and now we've lived here full-time for two years. Do you know there is not a single-framed photo of anyone in my family on any wall of this house. And if I'm being perfectly honest, if I float through and I think about countertops or those nice side tables that people have or shelves, I don't have any photos there either. I mean, We've been living in this house for two years, and there's this one wall that is over a bench that we have in this breakfast area off the kitchen. And when we designed the house, you know what I always imagined? I imagined one of those beautiful picture walls. I don't know if you've ever been in somebody's house, or maybe this is your house, where you have one of those walls that is just so beautiful, where it's matching frames and everything's lined up, and it's great photos of the family.

I have always wanted a photo wall of the family. And when we design the house, I'm like, I am going to hang photos there. Well, guess what? I've been thinking about that for two years, and it hasn't happened. Why? Because things don't happen by accident. They happen because you make them happen. One thing I really do want to wake up and see that I have done in the next six months, because it's going to make me happier, especially when Chris and I are empty nesters, is to walk into the breakfast area of the kitchen in October and see that that wall is done. That would make me happier, for real. Let me give you another example of something that comes to mind for me. In the area of relationship, relationship, love, and friendship, when I time travel ahead six months, what do I want to make happen in that area of my life? This is very, very clear for me. I want to look back on these last six months and see that I spent a ton of time with our son, Oakley, because I feel that I am in that moment. It's like a melting ice cube.

It is disappearing the time that I have with him is disappearing before my eyes. And so it is super important to me when I think about that area of my life that in the next six months, I spend as much time with Oakley as I can, and I got to make that happen. And you know what that's like. You set this intention, and then you mean to do it, and then you don't do it. Why? Because life is busy. That's why you have to get serious about turning this into a project that you're going to make happen. I think about my parents. In the next six months, I want to spend more time with my parents. In fact, my dad has just gone through this situation where three of his friends have had these catastrophic things happen. Two have died suddenly, and one of them fell downstairs and broke just about every single bone. We know that that is a horrible thing to have happen. My dad is turning 80 this year, and I want to spend more time with my parents in the next six months. I have to make that happen. And it's not going to happen by accident.

It happens on purpose. The next category, if I travel ahead six months, is career, money, or school. I've got so much I want to do there. But what I got to do first is take a short break so we can hear a word from our amazing sponsors. But here's what's going to happen. I'm going to be waiting for you. After the break, I want you to continue to think about that question. What do you want to make happen in the next six months of your life? And when we return, I'm going to share what I want to see happen in my life, what I'm going to make happen, I should say, in my career, because it's some pretty big stuff, and I know it's going to inspire you to think big, too. So stay with me. We'll be right back. Hey, it's your friend Mel, and I've been thinking it's time that you and I take our relationship to the next level. This may be a little bit forward of me, but I've got a gift that I want to give you. I've been working on this for a little while. It's a brand new free two-part video training that I created for you using principles of physics and neuroscience and all kinds of research to help you go from thinking about what you want to actually making it happen.

See, I want you to not only be inspired here on social media, I want you and I to take it to the next level and get off social media. And let me coach you and teach you on how you, yes, you can make the next six months of your life the best six months of your If it's not going to happen by accident, it'll happen on purpose. Homey wants you to do it, too. Here he is. Hi. You've got a gift for them, too? Oh, my gift is better because it's a free training that will help you change your life. All you got to do is go into the comments and type free, F-R-E-E. I'll DM you a link to the training. That's how easy you can make this training happen. Last time I did this last year, more than half a million people accepted this free gift. I hope this year you'll take our relationship to the next level and let me coach you on making the next six months of your life extraordinary. Let's make it happen together. Welcome back. It's your friend Mel Robbins, and I'm so thrilled that you're here. You're listening to a workshop about how you can make some amazing things happen in the next six months.

That by October, when you look up, you will see things that you've done that make you so proud. And I've been asking I'll go over and over this one question that's going to determine what happens in your life over the next six months. What do you want to make happen? Imagine that it's October, and I want you to think about your career and think about money or think about school and allow yourself to drift to October and look up, what have you done that you're proud of? For me, when I think about where I am in October, Holy smokes. I am going to publish my next book, The Let Them Theory. Yup, I'm writing a book about The Let Them Theory, and it's coming out in mid-September, which means six months from now, I am going to be in the middle of a massive book launch. And that doesn't happen by accident. I got to plan for success, just like you need to plan for success. So that's going to have to be something I'm journaling about in this workbook. I got to get going on that. That's going to take a lot work. And if you want more success in your career or in school, it's going to take work.

And so let's start today in making that happen. Here's another thing I think about. I don't know if I've talked about this on the podcast or not with you guys, but I have this desire to launch a product company in the women's health space. I mentioned that I'm in this super confusing supplement routine for my hormone balance. It's working, but it's so confusing that it has lit this fire in inside me that I'm like, I got to do something about this. I got to simplify this. I got to figure out something in this space to help everybody translate this confusing expert advice and all this supplement stuff. I got to do something. And six months from now, if I really get quiet and I time travel, and I go, What do I want to make happen? Here's what I see. I see that I have done the research I've got a research on the space, that I've got a business plan sketched out, that I know where the funding is coming from, whether I'm going to fund it or I'm raising money, and I also know who I'm going to recruit to be the CEO of this thing.

That's a lot, but that's what I see. And I can wish for it, I can want it, but that doesn't make it happen. If If I truly want to make it happen, I got to convert that wanting and wishing into a plan of action. And you know what I'm realizing as I say this is something else, because those two things have come up in my career, this massive book launch for The Let Them Theory, which is coming out in mid-September. And this desire to spin off and launch this incredible company is that, you know how I said I had that goal of saving money? That that was part of the goal setting that I did for best year? Here's what I'm realizing. I don't really care about saving money right now because I have too much going on. And the fact is, I have been saving money for years. I mean, I'm like a squirrel hoarding my nuts. I have been squirreling away money because I'll tell you something. If you've ever faced bankruptcy, like I have, if you have ever been in such financial distress that you can't pay for groceries, like I have, you get to a point where you never let yourself do that again.

And so I have been saving for years. I'm extremely risk averse. I've lost so much money in the past that I am not going to let that happen again. But here's what I realize in this moment as I'm talking to you, is that I don't care about making that a project right now. I don't care about making that happen because I already do that anyway. And just being able to say that this isn't a priority, this is so liberating. Is there something that you created as a goal at the beginning of the year that you're realizing now that it's April? You're like, I actually don't really care about that. I just said that, and I cared about it then. But the truth is, life has changed, or I realized the work that it's going to take, and I'm being honest with myself. Why have something on your list that you have no desire to make happen? So here's another takeaway. Your friend Mel Mel Robbins, I'm giving you permission right now. As you go through your workbook, melrobbins. Com/makithappen, as you go through this workbook, there is a page in here where you can list out the things that were once a priority that are just not a priority anymore.

That is a moment of honesty that you need to have with yourself. Clear away the guilt. Seriously, clear it off your to-do list. Take it out of the best year goals and create room for something that you care about, that you actually will make happen. And let me tell you why this matters. It matters because it's so easy to find yourself lulled into this robotic autopilot mode in your life, right? Where one day, blends into the next. And it's basically, get up, go to work, come home, make dinner, clean the kitchen, go to bed, get up, go to work, come home, make dinner, clean the kitchen, go to bed. It's just like, what What the hell? You've already forgotten what it is that you cared about because you're so exhausted. Next thing you know, you're like, Wait, four months have gone by, six. It's October already, and I didn't even do anything? Not happening to you. To Finding a game worth playing over the next six months will create meaning and excitement in your life. Sometimes the only thing that's missing from your life is a project that's worth getting out of bed for. I mean, think about it.

When you have a kid that's playing a sport, right? And they're like, driving towards the Championship and a winning season, you're driving towards something. And the fact that they're playing that big game of having a winning season, that creates excitement and meaning. When you're planning a wedding, when you're looking for a new apartment, when you're training for a marathon, when you're taking a class, it creates excitement and meaning. And don't look at these things that you want to make happen as a chore. That's not what the next six months of your life is about. You You get to choose. This is an opportunity to infuse the next six months of your life with something better, something worth getting out of bed for, something worth not getting lulled into that, Oh, I'll get up and go to work. I just do the same old shit all the time. And look, you want to know what's so cool? Is that I've only covered the first few pages of the workbook, for real. As I've asked you to time travel, as I've asked you to consider Consider this question over and over and over again. What do you want to make happen in the next six months of your life?

Think about these categories, and the workbook is going to take you even deeper. This is such a gift to give to yourself. And look, I could I'm going to keep going, but here's what I can feel. I can already feel your desire to download the workbook. I can feel your desire to start imagining some project that you can take on and design for yourself, something that is going to make the next six months just awesome, something that you want to make happen. And look, it could be something that is simple and crafty, like my photo wall. Do you know how happy I'm going to be that I actually made that happen? And it's going to take a lot more work than you would think. I got to pick the photos. I got to figure out the measurement. I got to figure out the size. It actually will take time. It sounds stupid, but it doesn't matter if it sounds stupid to you. This is something That's something that matters to me, and this is really important. If you want the next six months of your life to be awesome, you got to pick something that is personally important to you.

That if you were to work on it and see yourself chip away at it, it would give your life a sense of purpose. It would create some momentum. It would really infuse you with this energy and this enthusiasm. That's why this matters. Yes, we're going I'm going to talk all about how you translate this project into action. But first, I got to get you to start dreaming a little bit. I got to get you to define what would really help you come alive. And so here's how this is going to work. The second you go to melrobbins. Com/makethappend, you will see a little video from me welcoming you. You will get a copy of the workbook right there. And I've even taken the steps with my amazing team. You can download it. You can print it. We even have a low ink format. This is bright green and really colorful. You can do one in black and white, or we've created an electronic format for you, too. All for free. That's all you have to do to be registered for this free workshop. Just go to melrobbins. Com/ make it happen. And then what's going to happen is there are two in-depth video trainings, and those video trainings will help you translate this into action.

I'm going to walk you through all the remaining exercises in the workbook in those videos, and I'm going to teach you a bunch of principles, some that are strategies that business consultants use with some of the top companies in the world. We're going to talk about a principle from physics called the domino effect that will teach you how to take action, how to get started, how to leverage momentum and fight inertia. And for everyone in your life who is graduating right now, this is an incredibly important thing for you to give them because it will help you define what you want to make happen in the next six months. Because think about graduation. Holy cow. You know what happens when graduation hits? Holy smokes. It's like a tidal wave, and it sweeps you right into summer, and the next thing you know, you look up and six months is gone. This is also exactly what anyone in your life needs if they've been laid off, or if they're looking for a better job, or they're thinking about applying to graduate school, or they're launching a business. This workshop gives you the structure to define it, and then it will give you the tools and the teaching that you need to translate it to action.

The difference between time moving forward without you and you moving forward with it is taking a minute right now to figure out what you want to make happen during that time. Just imagine how different you will feel if you look up And it's October. And you aren't thinking about that side hustle, but it's actually up and running, and it's making money. You know how proud you're going to be of yourself? Just as proud as I'm going to be when I walk into my kitchen, and I sit down for a cup of coffee, and I look up at the beautiful photo wall that I've been thinking about for the last two years, and I finally got off my rear end, and I stopped thinking about it, and I made it happen. That is what's available to you, to stop talking and to start doing, to stop wishing and wanting, and to start creating. That's what we're doing here.

I want to talk to you about my favorite phrase when it comes to motivating yourself. I know if you've followed me for a while, you have heard me say this phrase before, but this is so accurate. It's so motivating. Before I tell you what this phrase is, Let me ask you, have you ever had an experience where you were so frustrated with yourself because you knew that there were things that you wanted to start doing, or there were changes that you wanted to make, or things that you wish you could prioritize, and you It just couldn't seem to pull yourself out of the day-to-day grind. That no matter how much you thought about it or contemplated it or just wanted things to change, that whether it was self-doubt or fear or the demands of your day-to-day life, you just couldn't seem to make traction on I'm changing. I see some of you going, Yeah, I feel like I'm trying constantly and nothing's gaining traction. I feel frustrated all the time because as much as I think about the things that I really want to be doing, I don't see myself making forward progress. It's almost like when I was in high school, I had a gerble named Ralph.

And let me tell you about this gerble, okay? This gerble made me angry, honestly. And the reason why this gerble made me angry is because he was really, really quiet during the day. Like he would nestle into his little shredded thing in the corner. And he never was that social or interested when I was walking into the room. And I'll tell you what, the second The second that I would turn off the lights in my bedroom to go to sleep, that freaking gerble would get on that wheel and just. And do you ever have a pet like that? Very nocturnal. We currently have a cat, Mr. Noodle. I see somebody going, Until midnight. Oh my gosh. And when I get into those modes where there's something that I really want to do, I feel this this friction and this frustration with myself because I know that I'm not as happy as I could be. I know that there's a change I need to make. I know that I'm focused on the wrong stuff. I know that my emotions are getting the best of me. I often feel like my mind is my durable Ralph on the hamster reel.

Just spinning, spinning, spinning, spinning, spinning such a common experience of knowing this thing that you want, and you can just almost reach it, but you don't have that sensation that you're actually grabbing it. I'm so glad that so many of you relate to this because I've been thinking about this a lot, and now I am, of course, overheating, so I'm going to take off my sweater.

That's what happens when you're 53.

I think about this a lot because I see even people that I love struggling with this. We have a daughter who is a singer-songwriter studying pop music out at USC. She's got all the talent, all the resources, all the skills, and there's always something that is stopping her from just starting to put music out, right? Or maybe you can relate to that in health. You really are like, this is the year, this is the year. For me, I keep thinking, I got to take some time to get the hormone thing, just understand it. Like, what food should I even be eating? I think about it like that hamster on the wheel, but I can't seem to make myself launch forward. Another example I can give you is for years, everybody, I dreamt of launching a podcast. I would watch all these people that I admire out in the world launching a podcast, and I would just spin and spin and spin and spin and spin. And so I'm so glad that you can relate to this. So tell me, is there some project or some area of your life or a business or a goal or some change that you want to make that you feel like you think about all the time, but you just can't seem to push through all of that thinking or push through the fatigue or the overwhelm or how do I get started, right?

You can't seem to just push through. Is there some area of your life where you feel that way? If so, I want you to write it in the comments. I see I want to work with animals. I see somebody going, Oh, my gosh, I keep thinking about doing a TikTok account. Oh, I want to get control of my addiction. Oh, I want to launch a business. Oh, I really want to get a degree, but I feel like it's too late. And you may be telling yourself that things just feel like it's too late, Mel. Like, I got a divorce, and now it feels like my life is frozen. I see some of you saying. I feel like ever since I got the divorce or the pandemic hit, or I lost the job, or I took the wrong job, or I moved to the wrong place, or I realized that I wanted to start this thing, and I started it, but now it's stalled out and embarrassed to keep starting. I want to finish my PhD. I want to be persistent with the gym. I want to get back to creating art. I see all this stuff that you all are writing down.

It's beautiful. I see so many of you saying that you have a little side hustle and you know that you want to turn your attention towards it, but you just can't seem to literally push through whatever it is, the fear, the overwhelm, the busyness of your life, to laser deserve focus on what really matters to you. And I think that's why it's so painful, because you're not going to stop really wanting and longing for those things that you keep thinking about everybody. They're going to linger for the rest of your life. You're going to have to, at some point, make a decision that it is important enough to you to make changes so that The thing that you want to see happen or the life that you don't want to miss out on or the degree that you always longed to get or the way that you want to feel in your body or the energy, for me, a big theme recently has been about loneliness.

I am so lonely in my personal life because of the pandemic, because our kids have launched, because we're moving to Vermont, because I'm always working. I can see very clearly that I have tried to solve loneliness in my personal life by working all the time.

That's not the right solution for loneliness. I even see all this. I'm glad that you can see an area of your life where you feel this friction and tension because you know that you want to focus more time and energy there. But there's so much resistance, and there's There's so much friction, and there's so much else going on that it is robbing you of the ability to push forward toward the life that you really want to be living. Look, it's not going to happen overnight. But so let me tell you this sentence, this truth about life that I truly love, that always kicks me in the rear end, honestly. Here it is. No one is coming. That's No one's coming. No one is going to come into your life and do the work for you. No one is going to come into your life and just remove your problems. No one is going to come into your life and make your dreams come true. When it comes to the changes that you want to make, when it comes to the things that you long for in your heart, when it comes to the music that you want to put out into the world, or the TikTok account that you want to create, or the degree that you want to get, or the life you want to build after divorce, or after your partner dies, or after you change jobs, or after the kids launch, when it comes to those things that you deeply long for, deserve, and desire, no one's coming.

You are not too late. If you're breathing, you're watching this video, you have plenty of time to create a life that makes you happy, to create a life that is full of meaning for you, whatever that means. You have plenty of time to take control, to heal. It is so important for you to hear that, that you have plenty of time.

But no one's coming.

At some point, you have to make a decision You'll often hear me say, You're one decision away from a different life, a better life. But you have to make the decision. No one's coming to make the decision for you. You have to decide that you are done feeling beaten up. You're done feeling lost. You're done feeling stuck. You're done feeling isolated. That all that crap that you've been enduring, you're freaking done. You have to decide that. And what's interesting is that once you decide, you realize no one's coming. I often joke that I'm not the expert that really learns this stuff by reading it in a book. Unfortunately, I'm a stubborn learner. So My life has required me to either fall into a hole or dig one for myself, and then I wallow at the bottom of the hole, feeling sorry for myself and stuck and frustrated and angry. Then I realized, Oh, my God, nobody's coming. If I want to get out of this hole that I'm in, emotionally, financially, health-wise, in my career, whatever the hole may be, I got to build the ladder. And it's that decision. I'm not staying here. I don't know where I'm going, but it's I'm not here.

It's that decision, the decision that no one's coming to do this for me. I'm deciding that I want more. I'm deciding that these last two years where I felt like I got thrown into a dryer and life just tumbled me around and all of a sudden the dryer stopped and I'm in there covered and lent and beaten up and staticky. We got to kick the door open, people. We got to make a decision that all that crap that you just struggled through and that you learned through, that it happened so that you could wake up and you could literally make a decision that the next freaking chapter of your life, you're not going to be unhappy. You're not going to just get by. You are going to make a decision that you are going to do the work to change. And here's what's fascinating. Once you decide, that's it. That's it. I'm changing. That's it. I'm going to do the work, whatever it takes. I made a decision that our kids have left this house that we've raised them in. I'm here alone all the time working. I'm like, I'm sad. I'm miserable. I got to change.

I can't just hold on and grip to what I know, especially if it's making me unhappy. Here's the thing, letting go, deciding that it's time for a change, that's a lot easier than gripping onto stuff that's no longer meant to you. When you make a decision, and I see so many of you going, My life fell apart after divorce. My life blows because of my job.

My life has been in stuck mode ever since this person I love died, or my life is just boring and I miss having fun. When you have that wake up moment and you're like, Oh, my God, nobody's going to come and do this for No friends are showing up to bring the party bus.

If I want to have my life feel like a party bus, I got to be the one that actually is driving it. You know what I'm saying? Here's the cool thing. No one's coming. Once you make that decision, here's the cool thing. Everybody shows up when you ask for help. Everybody shows up when you ask for help. Do not try to change on your own. I tried that for so long. Yes, it's your responsibility.

Yes, you need to do the work, but don't do it on your own.

Do not do that. I just got a text about 11 minutes ago from a really good friend of mine. I'm not going to say who my friend is because many of you probably know who this person is because she has a large social media following, and she's absolutely amazing.

She reached out to me sheepishly, and she said, A couple of people have been asking me if I would speak at a big event.

I I know nothing about this. I'm scared to do it, but I've decided that this is something I want to try. Now, she made a decision that this is something she wants to walk toward, even though she's scared. Did you notice what she did? She didn't try to figure it out on her own.

She reached out to me to ask for help.

Now, I'm going to coach her. I'm going to tell her everything I know. I have been the most booked female speaker in the world for years. I am one of the successful, motivational speakers on the corporate circuit ever on the planet, male or female. There are so many mistakes I made trying to do it on my own. When I think about how much I have learned about things like speaking or podcasting or even my marriage or raising kids. The mistake that I make when I try to do it on my own, holy cow. Talk about headache and heartache. She's so smart. She made a decision to walk towards something she wants, but that she's afraid of. And then she asked for help. Because the secret is once you know that you don't want to be where you are, that's all you need to know in order to change your life. I don't know where I'm going. I just don't know. I don't want to stay here. That's a starting spot. That's perfect. That means you started. That's the first rung of the ladder. I'm not staying where I am. The next run is literally figure out What people who have what you want, whether it's just people who are happy or what are they doing that you're not doing?

There's a little bit of the map. And then you got to ask for help. And so I can think of times in my life where I have been trying to do something new, whether it's fix an issue in my marriage. I don't do that on my own. Are Are you kidding me? My husband and I, we go to a marriage therapist and ask for help. We talk to very close friends of ours about what's going on and ask for help. When I get serious about wanting to make a change, it meets the new Mel Robbins. Mel Robbins, for the first 45 years, I would try to do it in secret. I would try to figure it out on my own. I was embarrassed to tell people that I needed structure and accountability, and I needed to be told what to do, and I needed somebody to bring some energy energy. And so I don't do that anymore. That's one of the reasons why my success has skyrocketed. And it's what I'm also doing with now the other areas of my life: happiness, balance, ease, a better business model. I'm freaking asking for help. I'm surrounding myself with people that bring the energy and bring the accountability and bring the structure.

And that's exactly what my friend did by texting me, Hey, I know this person that's ahead on the path. Now that I know and I've taken the steps and I've I'm asking her to give me advice to tell me what to do. And so while no one's coming, which I hope is a freaking wake-up call for you, I hope that's exactly what you needed to hear right now. In fact, tell me in the comments, what does no one's coming mean to you? And don't be snarky and sexual about it. I know I went viral on TikTok because some kids made fun of me for saying that. But seriously, what does that mean when you think about your dreams, or you think about your life, or you think about what you want, that no one is going to come in here and do this work for you, that no one is going to heal you. No one is going to do what you need to do to have the breakthrough that you need in order to create the life that I do not want you to miss out on. So once you make that decision that you are literally done with where you are, that you are going to do the work, well, now I'm here.

So I have to tell you, I want to help you. I want to be your coach. I'm just going to ask. I want to be your coach. If you have ever thought, wow, How cool would it be to have Mel Robbins as my coach? This is actually the only opportunity you're going to get in 2022. I have decided, after reading your DMs and after reading your emails and after seeing what you have gone through through this pandemic, I'm so proud of you. And guess what? It's time to freaking launch. It's time to launch forward. It's time to shake off the negativity, the sadness, the stuckness, the isolation. And it's time to take control of your life. And that's why I want to be your coach, seriously.

How the hell does something so simple work, Mel? I mean, come on, for real? 5, 4, 3, 2, 1? Well, let me get you into action, okay? Because when you try this thing, you're going to experience the change yourself. One of the reasons why this is so powerful is because your brain has one job, and that is to keep you alive, which means your brain will resist any new change you want to make. And the thing I'm going to have you do is going to make you feel this resistance. And it's important for you to realize that this is part of your wiring. You're never going to not have to push yourself to do things when you don't feel like it. This is just a fact of life. In fact, one of the hardest things for us all to do is to start something new. And there's a scientific reason why. The reason why is because pushing yourself to do something, whether it's pushing yourself to get to the gym, or pushing yourself to change a habit, or pushing yourself to stay sober, or pushing yourself to speak up more, or pushing yourself to express your boundaries, or make the cold calls that are going to make you more money.

All of that requires you to go from doing one thing, like scrolling on your phone or sitting on the couch, to doing something different. You have to summon something called activation energy. You have to activate the movement inside of you. One of the coolest things about why the five-second rule works is the counting itself is Trojan action. So it's almost like the little Trojan horse. So you're sitting there on the couch. You know you need to go for a run, but it's raining, and it's cold, and you don't feel like it. You blew it off this morning. You've already made yourself wrong. It's now three o'clock in the afternoon. You can think of a million things that you would rather do than going for a run. You now know the secret. The secret is motivation. Is garbage. No one's coming to push your ass off that couch. This is up to you. The second you're sitting there marinating in your excuses and your sad, sac, whatever, feeling low energy, I get it. I'm there every day at three o'clock right there with you, not feeling like it. The second you start counting backwards, five, four, three, two, one, you've made the decision to get off that couch and go exercise, even though you don't feel like it.

The second you hit one, get up off the couch. Start walking toward your closet. Change into your running shoes. Change into your tights, whatever. And five, four, three, two, one, walk out the door. That is how you sermon the activation energy to start. And starting is the hardest part, right? So that's why this works. In addition the physiology in addition to the brain science, in addition to everything else, from a real common sense point of view, you are starting with the counting. And so I want to leave you in motion. I don't want you to just learn about this thing because it doesn't work if you think about it. You got to use the tool. And once you use it, you're going to be able to teach it to anybody in your life that's struggling because they're waiting to feel motivated. You can give it to anybody once you try it. And so what's the best way to get you moving? I want you to do a five-day wake-up challenge with me, okay? I know you're already groaning. I can literally hear it through my earphones over there. I don't want to wake up. Good.

Okay? And for those of you that can just spring out of bed, first of all, you're a weirdo. And the way that we're going to make this work for you is set your alarm. If you're the person that just, Oh, I just naturally wake up. Oh, Why just spring out of bed? You're going to set your alarm 30 minutes earlier because I want to manufacture the resistance that you are going to push through with the five-second rule. For the rest of us who just hate getting out of bed, here's what you're going to do. Tonight, set your alarm, okay? Tomorrow morning, when the alarm goes off, you're immediately going to feel yourself thinking about getting out of bed. You're immediately going to want to stay in bed. We all do. I mean, who wants to get out of bed? It's cozy, it's warm, it's yummy in there, especially if you're sleeping with your loved one or your fur babies. Okay, I get it. That is me every single morning. When that alarm goes off, you're going to notice this moment of hesitation because you're not going to want to use the five-second rule. Good. That's that resistance.

That's the fact that activation energy is now required. That's your brain going, But I don't want to change. And then you're going to count. 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. Throw those sheets off. Stand up. You're going to hate this. Start walking towards the bathroom. By the time you get to the bathroom, you're good. So that's what you're going to do for five mornings in a row. Alarm goes off. Count backwards, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. The second you hit one, the sheets are off, and you stand up and start walking toward the bathroom. You're going to hate it. You're not going to feel like doing it. If you can push through the resistance that you feel every morning about getting up when the alarm rings, you can push through the resistance everywhere in your life. You are building a muscle, a muscle of courage, of confidence, of action. You are building the skill of being able to take action when you don't feel like it. And that skill will pay you dividends for the rest of your life. Now, I'd like to support you in this wake up challenge. And let me support you. And here's how you can let me support you.

Go to melrobbins. Com/wakeup. W-a-k-e-u-p. One word, wake up. I don't think it's one word in real life, or maybe it is, but on the website, it's melrobbins. Com/wakeup. The instructions for the Wake Up Challenge will be there in case you want to share them with somebody else. More importantly, if you share your email with me, don't worry, I'm not going to put you in some... I'm not going to sell your name to anybody. I just want to support you. I will send you a really fun, encouraging email every single day that you're in this challenge for five days, because I really want you to try this. I want you to try this because the five-second rule, I'm so passionate I'm passionate about it, not because of my experience. I'm passionate about it because of the experience of millions of people around the world who have used the five-second rule first to get out of bed and then to go on to make amazing, courageous, incredible changes in their life. The same is going to be true for you. But it's only true if you're willing to push yourself. Here's the interesting thing about this challenge.

Notice you don't feel like doing the wake up challenge. What are you waiting to feel motivated to do it? I mean, isn't that the whole point of what we've been talking about? In order to get what you want, you got to push yourself to act before you're ready, before you feel like it. I mean, what's the worst thing that could happen? That you try it for five days and then you go back to hitting the snooze button? I think something incredible will happen when you place a bet on yourself, when you allow me to support you by sending you these emails. I believe believe that if you were to practice pushing through the resistance five mornings in a row, and it sounds simple, it is not easy. I think you would be surprised by how good you feel about yourself and the ripple effect that it creates in your life. That's what I believe is going to happen, and I can't wait to support you in it. You are one decision away from a different a better life. And yes, it's not going to change overnight. It changes through those decisions that you're making that add up over time.

I hope you find the courage to make the decision that's going to change your life today. I'm asking you to 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, sign up for that wakeup challenge. Melrobbins. Com/wakeup, and let me support you. When you start making courageous courageous decisions, when you start pushing yourself forward, when you start going for bigger things, when you stop thinking and you start doing, are you going to fail? Probably. Will you mess up? I sure do. That's okay. I want you to just keep waking up every single morning, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, and show up for yourself again. Because it's what you do after you fail. It's what you in those moments when you don't feel like it. It's those moments when you push yourself that matters most. Do not waste another day of your life waiting, wishing, or hoping motivation comes. All the things you desire are right in front of you. They're waiting for you, waiting for you to push through all of that resistance and self-doubt and walk toward what you want. No matter how old you are or what's happened in your life, you can achieve the life you want.

I'm sorry, you don't have to believe it. I've got enough confidence in this fact to believe for you until you catch up. I have way too much evidence, having seen the lives of millions of people change through these small decisions, to know that, yes, you can change your life, too. You have dreams to fulfill. You've got a world to change. You've got a life to live. So I want you to get your butt out there and 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, go do it. I will see you in the Wake Up Challenge. I will see you in the next episode. And I am so excited to be kicking off this whole new chapter of my life with you. Thank you for being here. And more importantly, thank you for trying this. Because thinking about this tool is not going to change your life. Motivation is garbage. No one's coming. But you got everything inside you that you need. So 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. Go do it.

It will help you if you train your mind to start spotting evidence as you're doing the work, as you're going through your day. It will help you if you train your mind to start scanning the world and spotting evidence that, yes, indeed, the world is sending you positive signals that things are going to work out. Now, why is it important It's important to train your mind to help you get what you want. Well, the reason why is because if you get into a negative mindset, if you start thinking, Shit, this business is never going to work. Why even bother? I'm never going to meet anybody. It's nothing but losers out there. Look at all these idiots on hinge. Why the hell should I keep doing this? If you allow your mind to start to rest in a pessimistic, negative, protective, scared weird and doubtful stance, your mind will continue to show you reasons why there's nobody on Hinge worth talking to. Your mind will continue to show you all the reasons why you will never make it in business. Your mind will continue to show you all the reasons why you're never going to lose that weight and be able to tuck in your shirt, as my friend, Corinne Crabbtree always talks about, that transformational moment.

When your mind goes negative, your mind starts to scan the world and will show you more reasons to stop. The power of training your mind to spot positive signs is very simple. The power is that your mind will start to show you reasons to keep going. Your mind will help you take the step. Your mind will encourage you to feel optimistic, to feel empowered, just like you woke up today on a Tuesday, and it was February 22nd, 2022, and those numbers were are lining up, and that makes you in your heart and soul go, whoa, something cool could happen today. That shit only happens once in my lifetime, those numbers are going to line up like that. Today is a really cool day. Let's go do something with this. You could Create that attitude every single freaking day of your life. You could if you train your mind and if you start taking action. Training your mind is the key piece that we're going to talk about. For those of you that have read the high five habit, one of the things that I talk about a lot is every single day find a naturally occurring heart-shaped object in the world.

It could be a stone, it could be a leaf, it could be a cloud, it could be a shape in your coffee. Hey, Chris, if we've got anything around here that looks like a heart, hand it to me. The reason why I love telling you to start playing a game with yourself where you start your day going, mind, brain, show me some heart. Oh, what is this? Come here. Dog treat. Oh, my God, it's a dog treat. Look Look at this, guys. What shape is that, bitches? That right there is a heart, bitches. There we go. Check that out. If you say, brain, mind, show me a fucking heart today, Guess what's going to happen? That damn dog biscuit, you're going to be like, There's a heart. You're going to look out at the sky and you're going to see a heart shape. Or right there in the mountains. There's a heart shape in the mountains in Southern Vermont. You're going to see it in the clouds. What you're doing when you tell your mind what's important to you is you're telling your mind and the filter in your brain to change in real-time and allow into your consciousness what's important to you.

If you want to see hearts, by God, those damn dog treats are going to start looking like hearts, everybody. That's how you train your mind. It's freaking incredible. If you want to see evidence of this, follow me on social media. If you follow me, Mel Robbins, on social media, you will see every day I I'm reposting your stories of finding heart shapes around the world. Now, why is this important? Well, it's important because it's a simple way to prove to you that your mind changes in real-time. That if you get serious about becoming more positive and optimistic and encouraging of yourself, if you get serious about saying, Fuck this, I don't want to see all the reasons why I'm unhappy. I don't want to see everybody else in the world that's launched a business or that's lost weight and is healthy or that has a really good marriage or relationship. I don't want to see that shit and have my mind process it as evidence that it's never going to happen for me. I want my mind to reprogram itself and see other people's businesses and see other people getting healthy and see other people in relationships.

I want my mind to say, fucking, yeah, if they can do it, I can do it. That's evidence. If that person can get healthy, so can I. If that person can find somebody on hinge, so can I. If that person can reconcile with their child, so can I. Other people can become evidence that you can have it, too. Right now, your mind is so fucked up from your past that when you see what other people have and you don't have it, you can't actually translate it through a negative mind and see that that's evidence that you're going to win. You see it like, Oh, somebody already stole what I wanted. That sucks. And so what I want to start to open your mind to is that you have the power to train your mind to filter the world differently. Just like you woke up and you saw the date today, 2:22:22, and your brain saw that and was like, Whoa, This is a once in a lifetime day, everybody. You are never going to have another day that lines up like this. Ever. What are you going to do with this day? Your mind already interpreted this as, wow, something cool will could happen.

And if you tell yourself something amazing is going to happen today, something will because you're going to be looking for it. I swear to God, something will. Something will. If you want to see the good all around you, You got to tell your mind you want to see the good. And this just isn't a bunch of horse shit, everybody. This isn't toxic positivity. There is a filter in your brain called the reticular activating system. The reticular activating system. I call it the RAS. I like to think about it like a giant hair net on your head. And this RAS sits over your brain. I'm probably getting this wrong. I'm not a neuroscientist. I could give a shit about getting it right. I just need you to know the basics here so that you can apply it to your life. You don't need a PhD to use the science that super smart people have been working really hard on in order to apply it to your life. That's what I'm here for in your life. I'm here to translate this stuff into simple, believable, and actionable things that you can do to take all this super cool stuff that people are researching and apply it to your normal person's everyday life to help you change from the inside out.

One of the coolest One of those things that you have at your disposal is you have a whole system in your body that you can train and change. And one of those things that you can train and change that is impacted by that word you're hearing a lot of, neuroplasticity, that just means that things are able to twist and bend and change, and you're able to learn new things for as long as you're alive, as long as you're breathing, everybody, you got a chance to change the way that you think. As long as you are breathing, you got a chance to change from the inside out how you experience your life. As long as you are still here watching me, people, you got a chance to create a new experience in your life. And one of the things that helps a lot is understanding that right now, all of the bullshit from your past has jammed the filter in your mind, body, and spirit, the reticular activating system. And it is cloud your ability to look at the world around you and see hearts. Remember this? Dog treat. Heart's, bitches. Look at that. There's a heart right there.

I'm going to ask you, I want you to find a heart today, and I want you to tag me @melrobbins. Com. When you do. Okay? Tag me. Whoa, we got somebody whose birthday is today. Damn, you better declare something amazing on 2022-22. That's freaking awesome. Fabulous for you. So here's the thing. Your past has completely fucked up the reticular activity system. The reason why you doubt yourself, the reason why you think nothing works out for you, the reason why you're seeking validation from everybody else is because your life trained you to do that. And And I'm here to tell you, you can wake the hell up and you can realize that from this moment forward, you have the ability, using simple and believable tools, to reclaim your mind, body, and spirit, to retrain it and to use it to help you feel the way that you want to feel, to experience life the way that you want to experience life, and to build a sense of momentum as you go through your day and you start to see all kinds of stuff around you as evidence that you can have it, too. I'll give you a simple example.

So as many of you know, for a very long time, I've always wanted to launch a podcast. I got my start in the media business back in 2007 by having a local radio show in Boston, Massachusetts, on a talk radio station on Saturday mornings. That's what I did. I made $25 an hour. I hosted a show for 2 hours, a live call-in show where we talked about what was going on in the world. It was an advice show. I absolutely loved it. From there, that show grew. It then became a Sunday night show in Atlanta, and then I got a five-day-a-week show in Orlando. You're looking at a woman who got her start in the media business doing local radio. I paid for our kids' braces by reading Invisalign ads for the local dentist. I have been in the radio or podcast business since 2007, since before podcasts. And then my life took detours like it did. I have not been in radio since God, 2011, maybe. It's a long time, 10 years. And I've been thinking about launching a podcast for five years, everybody. Five years. And every time I would think about it, my mind would look around and my mind, my reticular activity system, that filter in my brain, was clogged with all kinds of crap.

And when I looked around and I saw all these people launching podcasts, that fact of seeing it would filter through my mind, and my mind would say, There's no room for you. You're too late. You're not going to be as good as those other people. So my mind was looking at the outside world and the fact that everybody and their mother was launching a podcast five years ago, and they still are today. And it would pass through the filter in my brain, and my brain would say to me, Mel, you're fucked. You might as well just stop thinking about it because you're too late, woman. How many of you do that to yourself? That you see other people having what you want and the way that fact that somebody else has gotten healthy, or somebody else has made a million dollars, or somebody else has launched a business online, or somebody else has found somebody after divorce and is happier than ever, and you see that, and you immediately Really assume, I'm fucked. It's never going to happen for me. Instead of having your brain go, Whoa, look at that. Look at all these people out there doing this.

If they can do it, you can do it too, Mel. Look at that. You got all these You got all these people that can give you advice. You got all these people that are lights on the path that you want to walk down. How cool is that? You got all kinds of information, all kinds of help, all kinds of evidence that's positive. Well, the reason why my mind didn't see it as positive is the same reason why your mind does not see everybody else's business and everybody else's health journey and everybody else's bank account and everybody else's fancy vacations. Or when you walk into a bar and all your girlfriends get hit on instead of you, your mind does not see all of that as evidence that it's going to eventually work out for you because your mind is clogged with all kinds of crap from your past. I'm here to tell you, when you wake up and realize that you could train your brain to wake up every day and go, Holy shit, today is going to be a magical day. Today is going to be that 2, 22, 22 day where you immediately see this.

You know this is the one day of your life where this is going to be the day. Come on in, Jessie. Jessie's here.

Hey, Yolo.

Yolo, come on in. You could literally train your mind to wake up every day and go, damn it, I'm going to see a heart today, and I'm going to see evidence today that shit's working out for When my mind starts to see that this is going to work out for me, I'm going to feel more empowered, I'm going to feel more inspired, and I'm going to keep going. Because the bottom line is, everybody, your positive mindset helps you with momentum, repetition, and discipline. Your positive mindset helps you by encouraging you to take the action. Because as you know, because you hang out with me, Mel Robbins, thinking about changing your life is not going to change your fucking life. The only thing that changes your life is action. You want something different, you got to do something different. But a filter in your brain that filters the world in a positive way, in an encouraging way, a filter in your brain that acts more like that annoying friend. You know that annoying friend who's always trying to build you up? I say annoying because when you're committed to being like, It's never working out for me.

I'm never going to meet anybody. I'm never going to lose the weight. And your friend's like, Oh, are you kidding? You know how amazing you are? You're like, Fuck off. Don't tell me I'm amazing. I want to feel terrible. So when you start to change your brain, when you start to really go to work on this filter, You're going to turn your own mind from a critic and somebody who's nasty into that friend that's really cheering you on. See? See, this is going to work out for you. See, you should keep going. See, this is really good for you to do. And that's why it's important. It's really hard to take action when you have a shitty mindset. It's really hard to find what's called the activation energy, the force to push yourself through the resistance and the fear, if you are committed to believing that it's not worth doing anyway. And so action is critical. Action is where the five-second rule comes in. But if you want to supersize this and step on the accelerator, you must start to train your mind. And one way you can start to do this is to look for hearts every day.

That's one chapter in the book we haven't read yet. See, this is a dog treat that was shaped like a heart. I asked Chris, he scanned the room. Boom, bitches. That's how this works. The other way that you can start to train your mind is to learn about the filter in your brain, to learn about the fact that this filter in your mind has the ability to change in real-time what you see.

Hey, it's Mel. Thank you so much for being here. If you enjoyed that video, by God, please subscribe because I don't want you to miss a thing. Thank you so much for being here. We've got so much amazing stuff coming. Thank you so much for sending this stuff to your friends and your family. I love you. We create these videos for you, so make sure you subscribe.