Transcribe your podcast
[00:00:00]

When I'm not hosting this podcast, I am writing books. But it is really hard for me to write when I'm at home. So I like to find remote cabins in the middle of nowhere to just hang out and write. But I hate the idea of my house just sitting empty, doing nothing but collecting dust and definitely not collecting checks. And that's why I'm an Airbnb host. It's one of my all time favorite side hustles. Other popular side hustles are awesome, too, don't get me wrong, but they often involve big startup costs. By hosting your space, you're monetizing what you already have access to. It doesn't get easier than that. And if you're new to the side hustle game and you're anxious about getting started, don't worry because you're not in this alone. Airbnb makes it super easy to host. I mean, if I could do it, you could do it. And your home might be worth a lot more than you think. Find out how much@airbnb.com. host I'm Nicole Lapin, the only financial expert. You don't need a dictionary to understand. It's time for some money rehab. We have one of my most impassioned rants, which you can probably recite for yourself by now, is that we should all learn financial literacy in school.

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It is absolutely nuts to me that we don't. So many financial mistakes are made completely by accident. I mean, think of how many missteps we could avoid if we just learned the proper money moves when we were young. I digress, because personal finance isn't taught in school, though. To learn about money, we turn to the source for all of our answers to the questions that but don't get discussed in the classroom. Our parents, this has been on money rehab arenas mind. She sent in a question about this very topic and I invited her on the show for a one on one intervention, which you can too, by the way. Just check out the link in the show notes and you too could get your money rehab on. But I digress. Again, today is for Raina and all of the parents out there who are trying to raise rich kids. Here's our conversation. Raina, welcome to money rehab.

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Oh, thank you so much. Nicole, how are you?

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It's so good to see you. I heard that you are reading a good book right now.

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Yes, Miss Independent is amazing. I haven't got through it all, but what I've read so far is helping me hit me to the heart. So thank you for that.

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No thank you. And thank you for writing in with a question. What's in your mind?

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So my question was kind of, how do us parents raise our kids to have what we didn't have growing up? So how do we kind of teach our kids about, you know, savings and accounts and just how to teach them to be right with money?

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How many kids do you have?

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I have two amazing daughters. I have one that's 19 years old. She'll be 20 in July. And then I have one that's ten. She'll be eleven in July. So there's a big gap. And they. My one, my ten year old, she's already talking about going to Paris, and I'm like, how are you gonna pay for that? So she has aspirations, for sure.

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It sounds like it. And you want to set them up on a path to becoming Miss Independent?

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Yes, definitely.

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What is your relationship with money?

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My relationship with money now is getting better. Growing up, it was zero. You know, I come from a pretty poor background. My mom didn't do well with money. My grandparents didn't do well with money. We don't come from, like, people who have, you know, businesses or real estate or any of that. I kind of just started developing as I. I've grown myself. So within the last past five years, I've, you know, cleaned up that. I've been reading your books. I've cleaned up the, you know, the whole debt. I cleaned up all my stuff, and now I'm just working on my businesses. So. Business, okay? Yeah, yeah. So I have, like, a nonprofit business, and then I have my actual business that I'm working, real estate. I'm a real estate agent.

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So were you just not taught about money at all growing up?

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Was not taught about it at all, and I think maybe those who don't have it don't talk about it.

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I would argue that those who have it also don't talk about it. I mean, it. Money is a mind bug, no matter whether you have it or whether you don't. And unfortunately, nobody learns it in school. You know, kids of wealthy parents, kids of families with lower income. So I think a lot of times, we're all in the same boat, no matter what. So I would just be gentle on yourself, because it sounds like, you know, a lot more than you're giving yourself credit for.

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I've learned, you know, but again, I know that I'm not 100% right yet.

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And where do you think that comes from right now?

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Just not having the things that I would like to have and kind of being able to take the trips that I'd like to take with my family and stuff like that. So it's just, you know, I'm not where I should be at my age, but I'm getting there, and I'm gonna be there, hopefully soon.

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Yeah, you are. You wrote it, and you said you weren't great with money, and I would say you are or you're pre great.

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Okay. Yes, I'm pregnant.

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I think. Listen, the biggest thing with kids is that they're watching you, right? So if you are saying you're not great with money, they're emulating that. So, like, I would start with some of that self talk, too. I know this is not exactly what you wanted to hear out of the gate, and I'll give you advice about how to set your kids up. You know, build them credit from an early age, give them lessons. But I think the biggest thing before any of that comes into play is just watching you and learning from you and feeling your energy around money, whether you come from a scarcity mentality, whether you're confident about money. So I would say before anything else, we got to get you in a place where you can be that role model for them.

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Yes, I agree. That's good advice. Thank you. I think I needed to hear that.

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Yeah, because, like, what do you think when you have interactions with money around your girls? Like, when you go to dinner or something? Like, are you stressed about paying? Are you stressed when bills come in? What are they seeing with your interactions with money?

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Well, right now they're seeing stress free. I don't really talk about money with them too much, but I do kind of. Well, my oldest daughter, she's working right now, so I just tell her she needs to have her bills paid and, you know, her insurance and all that stuff. My youngest one, she gets birthday money and stuff like that. So I just tell her to, you know, save for if she wants something big that costs money or spend it as she wants because it's her money and she can do whatever she wants with it, but it's not going to keep coming because you have to work to get that money, so. But when I pay for dinner and stuff like that, no, I just, you know, I show them and I teach them that, you know, you have to leave a tip when you have good service and, you know, just. Just little stuff like that. And so they do see the bill, and they know, like, oh, dang, mom's spending $150 for us to eat dinner tonight. You know, like, that's a lot of money. So they're like, okay. And the next time they're like, no, mom, let's not go out to eat, you know, let's just make something.

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So I think they. They respect money. They just. I just need help on teaching them how to manage it in the future so they can be set up.

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Well, I would say I'm proud of you. You have taken the initiative to read books about personal finance. You picked some really good ones. You're listening to shows about personal finance. You're teaching yourself. And so I just want to say I'm proud of you, and I hope that you're proud of you, too. And you're already starting to give your kids lessons, probably more lessons than you had. Right. About money. So I think you're doing better than you think.

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And, yes, I'm proud of myself, too.

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Yes.

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Okay.

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All right, so let's rephrase this question then. So you wrote in originally and said you're not great with money. How do we teach our kids about money when you're not great with it yourself? So, like, can we maybe reframe that question?

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Sure, we can rephrase it. I still feel like I'm not great. Funny. But what.

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What did we just talk about?

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But let's rephrase it.

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How about good? Can we say that we're good with money?

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Yes.

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Do you have debt?

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No mortgage, just student debt. Everything else is gone.

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Amazing. Which is better than your former self, correct?

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Yes.

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And better than your parents?

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Oh, yes. Yes.

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Can we say that you're good with money?

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Yes, I'm good. Okay. With money.

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How about that? We are confident with money. Confident with money topics?

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Yes, we're confident.

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Confident. I'll take. Hell, I'll take confident. Okay, let's go with that. Okay. So what is your question?

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How can I teach my kids and teenage. My teenage kids and my young kids and what's appropriate age to kind of, you know, teach them to be confident with money?

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Like their mama.

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Like their mom.

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Yes. And that is the biggest thing. It's really coming to the subject from a place of confidence. They feel it. They know it. They know when their mom is confident. They know when their mom is stressed. Even if you don't say it. Like, they know when you're fearful, they know when you're happy. Like, as much as we try to hide it, like, kids are so freaking smart and they just know. And that, like, that energy is more important because looking back to your childhood. Looking back to my childhood, like, I think of a lot of financial traumas, not necessarily, like, the numbers and the facts and figures, but how I felt at that time. Right. So you want to impart this feeling of confidence to them. And the best way to do that is to feel confident and approach all of these money topics like in day to day life, from going to a restaurant to paying your bills to tipping people with. From that place of confidence so that they, when they grow up, will come to it from a place of confidence, too. Cool.

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That sounds good. Yeah. Yeah, definitely. I kind of feel like I'm on the right track now.

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I think you are. Okay, so have you given them a piggy bank? Have you talked to them about, like, you know, if they get birthday money or if they get, you know, tooth fairy money or if they get, you know, side money or whatever, is there a share spend save delineation? I think that would be a good place to start. So, you know, whether it's an actual piggy bank or whether they're little cartons or whatever, breaking down an overall budget idea for kids is. Well, first of all, I love alliteration. You know, this from my books. Like, for, you know, adults, I say essentials, endgame, and extras. I think for kids, it's share, spend, save, because you're imparting this idea that when you get money, some of it you can spend, some of it you should save, and some of it share or, like, donate. Right. And so you're imparting that idea of doing good with your money and giving back with your money. Right. Would you say that those are in line with your values?

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Yes, definitely.

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So, like, when your youngest daughter gets birthday money, what happens?

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She just keeps it in her wallet, and then, like, every now and then she'll be like, hey, mom, can you take me to target? You know, I want to buy some legos or something. And I'm like, okay, you know, that's okay. Let's go. You know, I'll drive and you can buy. And sometimes she'll be like, mom, I want to buy Starbucks for us. And I'm like, okay. So then she'll buy me Starbucks, and I'll be like, score.

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And so, like, how much, approximately would she get for a birthday, for instance?

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So for a birthday, she'd probably get about $300. That's from everybody. From, like, her grandparents. And, you know, her grandparents are separated, so one will give, like, 150 and the other one will give, like, 150. And then, I mean, it's once a year. So they're like, you know, they don't live here with her. They don't see her often. So they do give a good chunk of money for her. And then. So when she gets a's on her report cards and she gets awards, and she just recently got principal honor roll, so she got $50 for all those awards, you know? So right now, I'd say her stack. And she probably has about maybe five or $600 saved.

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Damn.

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And she's ten, and I'm like, and she.

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How much do you have saved?

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Not that much.

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You don't?

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No, I do. No, I do. I do. But that's a lot of money. I never had that kind of money. When I was ten, I was like, quarters? Like, let me go get, you know, some $0.25 candy.

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Okay, well, all right, so let's take the first part of that first. So if she gets $300 for her birthday, I would like to be adopted by her grandparents, too. But, like, what if you got her, you know, and listen, I. I haven't hung out with ten year olds lately, so I don't know what's cool, but whatever's cool. Like, little containers. I used to have caboodles when I.

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Was little, so that was cool. What's a caboodle?

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Like, hello kitty stuff.

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Oh, yes. That's what she's into right now. She's into, like, the hello Kitty stuff, the cinnamon roll. She loves cinnamon rolls. So that's one of the hello Kitty Kuromi people.

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Cool. Okay, great. So, like, could we get a cinnamon roll? I don't know, like, little container or something? And then, you know, with that $300, could you be like, what's her name?

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Alyssa.

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Alyssa. Let's put $100 in the share bucket. Cinnamon roll. Let's put dollar 100 in the spend cinnamon roll. And this is when you're going to. You know, we're going to go to target, and you're going to buy us frappuccinos and whatever else, and then $100 is in the save, so you don't. We're not touching that at all.

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Okay.

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What do you think about.

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She would first of all be like, well, what's a share account? And who am I sharing with? And where is. You know, this is my money, so what's sharing? Like, what am I sharing? Like, am I going to buy stuff and then I'm going to share it with other people? Or. That would be something I would have to break down, for sure.

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Well, good thing that her mom runs a non profit. What a perfect person to explain how to give back to the community.

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Yeah, but it's different when it's a child. So it's like, I don't know if I should be like, buy, you know, baby clothes and then go share them with the moms who can't afford the clothes for the babies, you know what I mean? Because she loves babies.

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Great.

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So maybe that would work.

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I love that idea.

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Okay.

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Do you guys go to church or. We.

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We stopped going for a couple of months now, but. Well, actually, it's been a while now, but we pray every night. We are, you know, we have Christianity, faith, and we're, you know, we believe in God, so it's not, you know, but, yeah, but, yeah.

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If you think that Eliza would resonate most with helping out babies or kids, then I think that's a great idea, you know, because you're imparting this idea. Charity or community or talk to her about it, or just be like, you know, what we pray about is whatever you guys pray about and we're really blessed or lucky or however you guys talk about religion or giving back or just spirituality or faith in anything that we believe we should. And don't let me put words in your mouth. If you don't think that you should help less fortunate, then we're done. We don't need that bucket. But I have a feeling that you do.

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No, we definitely need that bucket. That is a very important bucket to have for everybody, especially kids, because sometimes they're so stingy and you don't realize it. You know, I sent some stingy kids.

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Or, you know, like, you could put $50 in there to start. You don't need to do it. Even. You could put $10 in there. I mean, it's more than is given right now, right?

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Yeah, definitely.

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Hold onto your wallets. Money rehab will be right back. Money rehabbers. You have money hidden in your house? Yeah, just hiding there in plain sight. Okay, so I don't mean you have gold bars hidden somewhere in walls, treasure map style, but you do have a money making opportunity that you're just leaving on the table if you're not hosting on Airbnb, it's one of my all time favorite side hustles. By hosting your space, you are monetizing what you already own. It doesn't get easier than that. For me, hosting on Airbnb has always been a no brainer. When I first signed up, I remember thinking to myself, self, you pay a lot of money for your house. It is time that house returned the favor. And to get real with you for a sec, I felt so much guilt before treating myself on vacation, because traveling can be so expensive. But since hosting on Airbnb, I feel zero stress for treating myself to a much needed vacation vacation. Because having Airbnb guests stay at my house when I'm traveling helps offset the cost of my travel. So it's such a win win. I mean, if I could do it, you could do it.

[00:18:01]

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How much do you think we should we just have a share, spend, save account forever?

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Yeah, I mean, I think starting out when you're in grade school, when you're in high school, even, I mean, you could get to a place where you also add your girls onto your credit card to help them build credit from an early age. And maybe you can give like a set amount so they can start understanding how credit works. Does your older daughter have a debit card or credit card?

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Yeah, she has a debit card. She's had, I opened her an account when she was 16, and then she spent all her money. She moved out when she was 19, and then she moved back in. So she just got a credit card. It hasn't even been a year, so it's been about maybe, maybe six months that she just recently got a discover card for herself. For herself.

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You're not on the account?

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No, it just her all by herself.

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And how is your credit right now?

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My credit's good. I have good credit. I probably have, yeah, I think it's good. It's like seven, maybe 757 40.

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We had the CEO of FICO, the show, and he didn't have a perfect credit score, so. And it doesn't, you know, remember, credit score doesn't correlate with how rich you are. How much money you have is just, like, how responsible you are. And so maybe start talking to her if you feel comfortable about what credit is or, like, what. What happens when you get this discover card and what is that interest rate? Have you guys had any chats about that? No, and I'm assuming, but, like, I, you know, we don't like to assume anything. Do you know how a credit card works or, like, the APR works? Okay, cool. Yeah. So, like, the APR is compounding, like, 20 whatever percent it might be, you know, can snowball out of control if you're spending the minimum. I think that might be helpful to talk with her about. Maybe. It might be helpful to talk about your credit score. You know, some credit card companies will allow you to add your kids to your credit card to help them build good credit from an early age. So I would call and see if there are age limits for the cards you use, and maybe that could work for both of your girls.

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So you can sort of just set them out on a better foot and then out of the gate. If you're able to help them build credit, then presumably the interest rates are going to be lower rate. Like, better credit score. It works like a seesaw. Lower interest rates.

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Yeah.

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I mean, you know, a lot of us, I think, can relate to this idea of having little credit history when it comes time to needing to get your apartment or, you know, struggling to get a lease and things like that. So I think that's if you've worked really hard to get your credit score higher. That is a really nice gift that it sounds like you didn't get. I didn't get either. To set your kid up. Right.

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Okay, great. Yeah, that's really good advice. So, yeah, I'll definitely do that and start it tonight because I'm that kind of person. Like, when you talk to me and I, like, have something in my head, it's like, I have to do it now. I have to do it now.

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Let's do it. Let's do it. Let's bring them on. Call them. Yeah, we can do it together if you want, but you can do this.

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Yeah. I mean, having her actually, I think having her have your books and read your books, too, is just. She's very. Because I have asked her, my oldest one. Hey, you know, like, you know, she's like, I'm not reading that. I'm not in school.

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I'm not reading that.

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I'm done with school. You know, like, she. So she hasn't really taken the leap yet to try to, like, you know, educate herself on this. I do give her the tools, you know, and I try to kind of say, here, you know, read this or here, you know, do this. But I can't make her do anything, can I?

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Could I sign a book for her?

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Yeah, definitely. Her name is Lorraine.

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Okay. Would that maybe encourage her a little bit more? I could also say, ps, your mom is awesome.

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Yeah, definitely. It might encourage her. And I'll hand it to her and tell her, you know, you know, Nicole said, read this book. It will help you, and it will. I know it will.

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Thank you. And you can tell her slip into the DM's if she has a question. Nerdy style. DM's. So when you talk with your girls about money, you gave the example of going out to dinner and spending $150. What's really interesting about kids is that they often don't know how much stuff costs. If you ask them how much a car costs, the answers are so funny. Sometimes they're like a million dollars. They have no perspective on money or how much people make or how much a house costs.

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Right, right.

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I think that starting to be transparent when you talk about how much stuff costs, like, in an intentional way, can be really helpful to kids.

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I agree.

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Like, talking about $150 being, you know, a high amount of money for, like, $150 being for a nice dinner for three people. Right. But, like, if we're all going to go to get a sandwich or something like that, like, here's how much it costs. And sort of just talking through, like, the motions of when you're going to check out at target, talking about what the tax is, talking about, that type of stuff, and even talking about paying money back. So if they want to buy, well, you're younger. If Alyssa wants to buy something that she doesn't have money for, although, I mean, it sounds like she. She could give out loans. She doesn't need loans, but if she needed to get a loan, you know, you could talk to her about, well, you would have to pay interest. And here's how interest works. Right. So just in little everyday ways, bringing money back into the conversation so she feels more comfortable talking about it, I think would be a great next step as well.

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Okay, that sounds. Yeah.

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Does she get allowance?

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She does not get allowance because she has to be reminded to do her chores. So if I have to remind her to do it. She doesn't get it. But if she does it on her own, then I will give her an allowance. But she doesn't, so she doesn't ever get allowance. She always forgets.

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Okay, well, if she doesn't forget, then what do you think about this idea of negotiating for an allowance?

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Oh, definitely. I'm all for negotiations, girl. I'm a real estate agent.

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See? Exactly. So you have that entrepreneurial spirit like you learned, I'm assuming, negotiations in the school of hard knocks. Yeah, it's a skill.

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It is.

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People are scared of it, and she does.

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She'll. She'll negotiate with me every now and then. You know, she's like, well, what if we do this, you know, instead of doing this? Or, you know, if you can give me, you know, a couple extra dollars and I'll, you know, go through the market for you and get all the stuff, you know, like, just little things like that. So, yeah, she negotiates with me, too.

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Cool. And I think it can help instill more confidence, too, in explaining and being able to articulate her worth. Right. So she could say, well, you know, mom, you're not giving me allowance because I forgot to do my chores. But, you know, I got on a roll or I got on this thing. And so I think for that, I deserve, you know, XYZ. And so even if you say no, I think getting in the habit or sometimes you can sort of encourage her by saying, okay, well, you think you get $5? Like, I think you get $2. And so you're just bringing those skills and bringing that dialog into her life.

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Yep. I never thought about it like that. So, yeah, this is shed a new light. I definitely always keep that part of me in the business world. I really don't take it home, you know, because I always tell myself, leave my work at work, you know, and when I get home, it's just about, you know, being home and. But. But now that I've been really dwelling on this whole financial stuff with the kids, it's like, this is. Shines such a bright light, you know, because it's. It's important.

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I'm so glad it is so important. And it sounds like you put yourself on the right track, and I wouldn't keep it to yourself. I would, you know, let that be shown to your girls, because what you're doing for yourself is really positive. And so I think a lot of that can and will rub off on them. So let it shine.

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I will, I will. I will let it shine.

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It's awesome that you are, you know, thinking so much about them and how to set them up on the right track and. And do better than what you had. And I think that's the sentiment that a lot of parents come from. And the difference is that you're, you know, taking those actionable steps, taking those notes to do something about it, which is awesome. And that's how the cycle gets broken.

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I appreciate that. Thank you. And I appreciate all the work you've done and everything. I see you, girl. I see you every day. So. Hustling, doing your thing non stop. So I really appreciate it from the heart. Yeah.

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Thank you. Thank you. While I do it for women like.

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You and we all appreciate it, I.

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Do it for women like you, and I do it for your girls. I mean, it's. It's crazy just to, like, when I had book tours or book signings, there've been a few women who have come up for a book, and, like, some I noticed or some I didn't, and they're like, I'm pregnant, like, with a girl, and I want my daughter, like, already thinking from the womb, and then I start crying, and then I get emotional, and then I think about young girls and financial literacy and financial empowerment.

[00:29:08]

Yes. I wish I would have done that. But you know what? I can only do what I can now, you know? So if I would have thought about it from the womb, it would have been so much better for me. But that's all right. I have you now, so I am here for you.

[00:29:23]

It is never too late. You're never as young as you are today. They're never as young as they are today. And today is as good a day as any.

[00:29:31]

Amen, sister.

[00:29:33]

Amen, sister. Money rehab is a production of money news network. I'm your host, Nicole lapin. Money rehab's executive producer is Morgan lavoie. Our researcher is Emily Holmes. Do you need some money, rehab? And let's be honest, we all do. So email us your money questions, moneyrehaboneyoneyoneynewsnetwork.com to potentially have your questions answered on the show or even have a one on one intervention with me. And follow us on instagramoneynews and tiktokoneynewsnetwork for exclusive video content. And lastly, thank you. No, seriously, thank you. Thank you for listening and for investing in yourself, which is the most important investment you can make.