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On today's part, in my take, we have our good friend Ryan Rossello dressed ridiculously. Great time with him. We actually recorded on his 49th birthday, so it was a great time with him. We have the mount Rushmore of best feelings. We have six Mount Rushmores left. So it's coming down to it. We're talking some preseason is like the last week before football really starts. Not a ton going on, but we talk some preseason we're going to do who's back of the week. We also have to talk about Hank lighting the lighthouse, ringing the bell. Ringing the bell of the lighthouse.

Keeping the lighthouse.

Keeping the lighthouse. Great show. It's all brought to you by our friends at DraftKings. If you've been hungry for some college football, well, we finally get a taste this weekend. Don't miss any of the action. Jump in at DraftKings sportsbook. It's a small but mighty slate of games for week zero, including a big matchup in Ireland. It's super easy for first timers to get started. Try betting on something simple, like picking a team to win. Go to the DraftKings sportsbook app, select your team and place your first bet. This is going to be Draftkings biggest college football season to date. Enjoy the ride now all the way through the expanded playoffs. We're so excited. The Florida State Georgia tech game is the Ireland game. It's going to be great. What is the line for that? Can someone find that for me? Oh, I got it right here. Florida State's an eleven half point favorite. Florida State maybe this is them showing out that they should have been included in last year's playoffs. Got to think that angle. And for all the newbies getting into college spirit, here's something extra special. New Draftkings customers bet $5, get 200 in bonus bets instantly.

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Okay, let's go. And then. I love the soft work to be done.

No place to hang out or washing and then I can't blame all.

On the sun oh, no, we cannot.

Rock down to Electric Avenue and then.

We'Ll take it higher.

Than my take.

Presented by Barstool Sport. Welcome to part of my take presented by DraftKings. Score big with DraftKings all college football season long. Download the DraftKings sportsbook app now and use code take. That's code take for new customers. Get dollar 200 in bonus bets when you bet just $5. Only on draftkings, the crown is yours. Today is Monday, August 19, and this is the first show that we are doing in the midst of royalty. Lighthouse royalty.

The keeper of the light.

We are with the keeper of the light. Slash bell. Henry Lockwood is back in studio. Hank, I don't know. Should we bow to you? What? I mean, are you a sir?

Are you?

See? Yeah. Are you a knight?

I'm a keeper.

You're a keeper. You're officially a keeper.

I don't think a knight would light the light, right.

No. Well, he didn't.

You break the knight.

Neither did he.

That's true. You kept the light. So where's the light? Do you have it right now?

Yeah. Is it still on?

It is still on.

Okay.

I think you just keep it inside you.

Yeah. Always.

You have that light, this little light of yours.

So you. So explain. Because, you know, we talked about briefly when we taped our Mount Rushmore on Wednesday that people were listening to, but we didn't get the full recap of you keeping the light, ringing the bell and also maybe sprinkle a little Matthew Chudon.

Yeah. Matthew Judon. That happened the day after we recorded. He did get traded. I mean, he's a little bit older. He wasn't probably going to talking points. Yeah, it's good. If the, if the Patriots, you know, have a top five pick, God knows how that would happen. Then they're going to have, you know, five draft picks and in the top 150, I think.

Yeah, I thought you said that.

And that's how you rebuild.

I thought you said ongoing talks were productive and good.

I think that. But they realize it's probably best for both parties. Yeah, those good. You know, everybody's happy.

Yeah, everyone's super happy. This is actually the best thing that's ever happened.

Is the draft cut off usually 150? Is that where we're top 150?

I can't think.

Halfway through the fourth round, no good.

Players have ever been picked past one, especially not with the Patriots.

But five and out of 150 is good.

Yeah. Is this. This was a talking point. Would they give you a little sheet being like, here's how we're going to spin this?

No, it was, you know, people were obviously like, that was the day of. People were a little bummed out. Uh, but, no, it was an amazing experience. Got there early. We got to go on the field pregame, save one, warm up. Then they brought us.

How long did it take to go from the field to the lighthouse?

You had to go all the way up? Yeah, we went old school. Stair, no skin. It was, it was cool. They brought us up the elevator. It's really tall, so it took a while to go. Yeah, but, like, when you're, you know, it's kind of like it was a really, really, really tall elevator, except really tall White House. And we do have a little announcer thing, kind of like a tour guide. Like you're in a Disney world or, you know, a theme park or, like, oh, so it's like virtual tour, where they say, welcome to the largest lighthouse in the continental us, which. Nice touch.

I looked on the website, and it's interesting because they have quotes around the.

Word lighthouse, but that was actually really nice because what he just said right there, it's. It's basically Disney World. Yeah. It's like, it's like going to Vegas and seeing the Eiffel Tower. Yeah.

It's like Space Mountain isn't really a mountain.

Yeah, right.

But people love Space Mountain, right?

No, listen, we're not. We're not saying there's not love. Just like it's more of an attraction than a lighthouse. Yeah.

It's a. It's a lighthouse simulator.

Right.

So, Hank, it's a lot.

It's a representation of the region.

You went on a ride region.

I gotta ask you, from the top of the lighthouse, you had a pretty good view. And I gotta say, the double fist pump that you gave to the crowd was incredible. And it seemed like they were eating out of the palm.

Oh, my God, they were.

It was like the parade all over again.

Were you thinking at any point, encore. Because it felt like the fans wanted an encore of you ringing the bell?

We can't unring the bell. Once. You ring it once, it's kind of.

Wrong, but it like it. If you notice, people weren't leaving.

Yeah.

They were, like, sitting there, like, come on, we want more.

Well, it's a beautiful moment. You guys, you know, obviously are making jokes, but it was.

A real sports pilot.

It was basically a hurricane going on in Foxboro before we showed up. Where we're driving in, there's lightning, there's thunder. It's dark. You can barely see on the road. And as we're going up the lighthouse, the sun emerged from the clouds. You know, the sun came out. The. The skies got bright, obviously, you know, because of the rain. The fans hadn't got there yet because it was such bad weather.

They were probably needing a light to guide them into the stadium.

Preseason game, and it hadn't.

Hadn't started yet. So, yeah, they said, you know, you're going to ring the bell three times and turn around and face the crowd. And it was. It was. I started laughing. I think. You couldn't really see my face, and I instinctively did this.

Yeah.

And I heard, like, I just saw seats, and I heard, like, one.

You know, there was a rogue clapper.

There was a lot of awls there. For the amount of limited amount of people there. There was, you know, a good amount of awl. So thank you for shouting me out when you were there.

The behind the scenes clip you posted on your instagram was so funny because it was like, ringing the bell and then kind of silence, and then someone behind, maybe it was one of your friends, just started clapping, and it was kind of like a Jeb bush please clap moment where it's like, we gotta. We gotta do something here.

Everybody wants to know, though. Hank, you get up to the top of the lighthouse, you look at. I'm sure you looked for a federally recognized body of water. Yep. Did you find one?

There was. Trees were in full bloom.

Yeah. Yeah.

So I think the nepontan river was. You could see through it a little bit, but it was pretty blocked by.

The trees, so you couldn't see it.

Got it.

Cause I would imagine that if you had seen the river, you would have taken, like, nine pictures of the river and been like, look, it was also.

Really still foggy from the sun came out.

Yeah.

But there was still some lingering fog, so you couldn't really see too. Too far out because of the fog.

So you.

But it was.

You could see the sun, though. Yeah, but not the trees.

But, like, seeing far enough. You know, there's so much fog.

Sun's really far away.

Yeah. Someone's behind us.

But did any boats crash into the stadium while you were up there?

Nope. Nope. Kept it. Well, I kept it. Well, did you.

Did you get the vibe that maybe you're gonna be invited back for a regular season game?

Yeah, I think that was a good first step. I think I, you know, I told you. Yeah. The Patriots were. They were amazing. They rolled out the red carpet. I, you know, thanked him the next day. They said, you were great. Keeper the light. Okay. One of the funnier moments was, you know, a very official woman came up with a very official, like, big book. She's like, we need you to sign this. All the keepers of the light sign it. Went through. There's only been ten, or I think I was the 10th. Oh, Tom Brady. Tom Brady was the first one. Kenny Chesney, James White.

Oh, my.

Like, you know, the team that won the state championship, then Henry lock. And I was just laughing, thinking about, like, two years from now, there's actually, you know, a famous person who's not really familiar, obviously. And they're going through that list, and they're gonna be like, oh, yeah. And then just gonna, like, flip through my name like Henry Lockwood and then.

Right. Make a wish underneath it.

No, there actually was another make a wish kid. One of the. In one of the. He was one of the ten.

So you. When you say there was another make a wish, you're.

There was.

You're admitting that you were make.

It was.

Yeah.

I mean, it. Listen, it was a very cool moment. I didn't. You know, I didn't.

Summer hate.

Yeah, it was very surreal. I didn't feel like I necessarily deserved it, but it was cool. They announced me. They said, you know, please welcome part of my take, Brady, for, like, that was a very lovely moment. And, yeah, it was. It was sick. Like, it's your world. The pictures will last forever. And I think I did a good job. And, you know, you crushed. As things go along, like, they're obviously gonna, you know, go through the roster of all the famous, you know, celebrity patriot fans, but eventually, they're gonna have to go back to the well, and they might just look through the book.

Yeah. Who's number ten? Yeah, let's bring him back. We know he can do the job. Yeah.

It's very good, Hank. It's very. It's. They said prestigious honor. I'm looking through the list of people here that have been asked to keep the light, and it's like a general from the army, Dante scar Necchia, was asked to do it. What is Kenny Chesney? What's his connection? Because I feel like Kenny Chesney is just the. The guy that they invite whenever they need a celebrity sports fan to show up, regardless of team.

He does country fest there every year. Like, he's a big. And I'm sure he's friends with the crafts, but that's always, like, a big concert at Gillette, and I think he is a Patriots.

They just didn't have. Oh, he might have done it. He might have done it for.

I think he did it second.

He might have done it for Army Navy for game day.

No, he was second. He was the second up there. So it's Tom. He did it first on the 10th, then Kenny Chesney did it on the 17th. I feel like Kenny Chesney does three different college game days a year.

Did you guys win?

We did not. When they also, I will say, they said the person up. Up top, the person who was, you know, stationed up there, they said Kenny Chesney was really nervous, and I was less nervous than him.

Wow.

Oh, wow.

You weren't even nervous.

And another guy came up and said, that was one of the hardest. As I was walking in, one of us, don't ring it too hard. And I was like, I'm.

That.

That just means I'm gonna go. Yeah.

Yeah. He was basically daring you. So, wait, the Eagles won?

Eagles one.

Eagles had to come back. Victor.

And I feel like Max.

I feel like patriots fans, you're now experiencing phase two of Joe Milton.

Yeah. Was it phase two?

It was a little bit of phase two.

Hank doesn't remember.

You don't remember?

No. He was living off the high of the lighthouse.

Were you drunk when you rang that bella?

Not when I rang the bell.

Got it.

I did, you know, celebrate with a couple shandies after yeah, yeah, yeah.

But, yeah. Joe Milton, unfortunately. I mean, I'm still going to get excited about Joe Milton because you make the roster.

Yeah.

When he's good, you have more quarterbacks now. Okay. So great job, Hank.

Yeah.

Thank you.

Preseason marches on. We also had Patrick Mahomes should be in jail for being witchcraft because the back, behind the back pass that he unveiled just not fair.

Yeah, I said that it should have been taunting running that play because Patrick Mahomes is now bored of football. He's so good at football that he can't play like a normal quarterback because it's too easy for him. So he just ups the difficulty level. Now he's throwing behind the back passes.

And now teams have to. Game plan for it.

You got a game plan for it? He did. He gave a quote after the game was over. He said, long story short. Sorry, long story short, Travis didn't run the route he was supposed to run. And then it was kind of behind the back pass because I was mad. I was pissed off, Travis. So he ran the wrong route, and then Mahomes threw it behind the back just to kind of, like, make it more difficult for him to catch the ball.

Yeah.

And it ended up being one of the best plays I've ever seen.

It was so cool. It was so cool.

He said, out of spite, I threw a behind the back pass. But now it's going to be a highlight.

Yeah. Now it's going to be highlight. Now it's going to be something he'll do during game, and now teams have to plan for it. And. Yeah, he's. He's reached a level of, like, fuck around with football that is. Has never been seen before. Yeah.

And then the camera pans to Carson Wentz on the sideline just laughing and smiling.

He's on the Chiefs.

He's on the Chiefs.

Oh, huey, that's a big one.

There's a good chance that Carson Wentz wins another Super bowl.

Yeah. Also, Randy Gregory, not on the Bucks.

Was he ever a buck?

He was. Todd Bowles said after they decided that they're going to cut him because he never showed up. He said, you can't miss what you never had.

Yeah.

Which is a great. A great way to live life.

He doesn't know why he never showed up.

I think he just didn't want to do the conditioning, maybe.

In which case, respect Randy Gregory.

I think that he'll probably just get added to the 49 ers, like, halfway through the season and like, damn, look at the 49 ers again.

Yeah. That's probably what's going to happen.

Pft our quarterbacks still looking good. Yeah. So we were at a wedding on Saturday night. Our good friend Mark Titus, a good friend of the program, got married and PFT was watching the game at the wedding.

Yeah.

Fucked up that he did that.

What kind of an asshole gets married week two of the NFL preseason? So at 06:00 p.m. when he knows that Jaden Daniels is going to be playing.

Yeah. And I also got accused of by my wife of peeking over it at the game because I just like, like a moth to the flame, he was. Pft was sitting next to me and he just had the game up and I would just kept on being like, oh, football's on.

Listen, I'm going to. I'm going to watch Jaden. I'm going to watch my new quarterback in the preseason. I did a bad job watching him. I was going to watch, and then when he was out of the game, put the phone away. Whatever happens, whatever, don't care. He looked good. But then there was one point in the second quarter I had looked away from my phone for a while as being social or whatever at a wedding.

I lame.

Yeah. Big time man card move on my part. I look back at the screen and I see the quarterback sprinting downfield, running away from everybody like, fuck, yeah. Jaden is so good. Jaden is so good. And then he gets up and it was Jeff Driscoll.

So I guess we got Jeff Driscoll.

I guess we got. We got, like two Jaden's now.

That's incredible.

I feel like Jeff Driscoll is sneaky.

Jaden, I also saw Jeff Driscoll, I believe, already has started his second career. I don't know why. I think someone showed that they were connected to him on LinkedIn and he's already, like, working in the greater Florida area. Yeah. Acquisition, entrepreneur, NFL athlete, acquisition, entrepreneur. SMB owner for him.

SMB. So, yeah, yeah.

It's just very funny that a guy who's playing in the NFL right now has, like, a full LinkedIn.

Yeah. The start of a new Driscoll year.

Yeah. All right. And then my guy, Caleb Williams, made a throw that made me feel things.

Yeah, he's good. We got quarterback.

He was, he started the game slow and the haters started piling on and I was like, listen, it's good that I haven't overreacted to any preseason games or plays or throws. And then he dropped that rollout to Roma Doonze and I lost my mind and I went back to telling the haters to suck my dick from the back.

Yeah, he was pretty good. Yeah, he was really, really good.

I'm just very excited for week one and I'm very excited to just get on the roller coaster and just have a fucking great ass time.

Yeah. I am starting to get nervous every time Jaden runs with the ball, though, because he doesn't slide. Are we getting, we saw that at LSU. When he gets hit. It is funny watching that compilation of Jaden Daniels getting hit with like the Bugs bunny.

Yeah.

Because it does look like Looney tunes. Yeah, he's playing. I would, I would prefer for him to slide and at one point he didn't slide and then I. Dan Quinn. Dan Quinn's hats have gotten more backwards since he became a head coach. On further back, they're further backwards. I didn't know that was possible. But he's on the sidelines with his backwards hat, like, jawing at Jaden after the play. I'm like, dan Quinn's right. Listen to Dan Quinn. You're going to get hurt, Jaden. Yeah, so I've, I do have that, like, you know that history with quarterbacks where you get a really good mobile quarterback that can run. He's electric. And I just hope to God that we've done something different with the field because I don't think the Bears anything different with their field. I saw, oh, so bad for the game. They had the scene.

Metallica. Yeah.

Metallica did it.

Metallica did it. This is, this is the, this is what, like, every time I had, you know, a step forward in like, man, Ryan polls has put us a great team together. Caleb Williams looks like the real guy and then you just get brought back to down to reality where it's like there's just reports that Ryan polls is walking the field looking at, pointing out all the seams, being like, this is not safe to play on because we're not a real franchise. Yeah.

Metallica concert one week before the game.

Yeah.

That's tough.

Yep. And they obviously, the Bears don't own soldier field so they don't get to decide what goes on there. But yeah, it's, I just want the season to start. I, I know that we've talked privately pft, that we've probably gotten ahead of ourselves, but it's okay. Are you getting ahead of yourself with Drake, May?

No, I'm patient.

Okay. Cuz I got, I got ahead of myself today. This is, we're just giving fodder to the haters who are just gonna clip all of these and put a compilation. I was in the car with my kids, and I was just thinking, like, what if Kale Williams is awesome for, like, the next 15 years and my kids, like, go to college and Caleb Williams is still the bears quarterback?

Yeah, it could. It could be.

What if. What if they're, like, literally starting college and they're like, yeah, I just grew up with Kale Williams.

It's more going to be like the you saying that than you saying that, like, three years ago.

What do you mean?

What?

Like, I feel like you said that exact same thing about Justin Fields.

Okay, well, you know what? We were.

I'm saying, like, you're talking the comple.

You rang a fucking bell, dude. It wasn't even a lighthouse.

Also. Also, Caleb's different. I can admit that. Watching Caleb. But my biggest fear.

Different.

And I've talked to big cat about this offline, but we might as well share it online.

Yeah.

My biggest fear now is that Jaden Daniels is gonna be so goddamn good and that Caleb or Jane Daniels is gonna be awesome. Like, I'm talking Joe Burrow. I'm talking Josh Allen, and then Caleb Williams gonna be Patrick homes.

We've already got that.

And then I'm gonna be like, this motherfucker. And I'm not gonna be happy with being so great. So, like, it's. I've really talked myself into a corner here where, like, I need Jade. I need Jaden to be great more than anything I've ever needed in my entire life.

Yeah. Yeah. Pft did say that. And I was just like, whoa, that's. We're really getting ahead of ourselves.

Yeah.

We've got Jaden as Josh Allen and Caleb.

I'd say minimum. Minimum.

Josh Allen, Hank, just get in with us. Yeah.

You guys are in win now mode. We're not. We're in load up mode. We're in more load up. You know, top 150 pit. Let Jacoby play. Whatever happens, happens. He's Drake made more like an Aaron Rodgers. Like, he's gonna be great. He's got to give him some time.

So one Super bowl in 15 years.

Yeah.

A couple MVP's.

Okay.

I mean.

Oh, that's what you care about now.

You need all saying, but, like, Aaron Rodgers, you know, I'll take that as my QB.

I'll do one.

One super ball.

Yeah.

You need kind of.

You need this finance.

I actually don't. Oh, I guess I do.

Yeah.

Yeah. But you. You do need it to. Well, you actually don't. That's. That's the thing. Is Hank could. Hank could miss on the next, like, four quarterbacks and still be fine. Yeah. Which we're at a point where it's like this, you know, both what we've been through and also our own age in mortality.

Yeah.

It's like, you got it. You got to do it soon.

Like, this is kind of our last bite at the apple here, because who gives a shit? Who gives a shit if the commanders win three Super Bowls in my late fifties, early sixties, like, these are my prime years for enjoying that sort of thing.

Right. We need it now. Right now. I hope.

I hope it.

We're basically just two chicks with our biological clocks just fucking screaming at us.

Yeah.

You won't be able to enjoy Super Bowls in ten years from now. You'll be menopausal.

I'm going through menopause right now.

Yeah, we can't have that. We're going to gain weight.

And the shitty flashes. The Patriots could stank, the Celtics could self destruct, and then, obviously, the Red Sox will become great again. Hank just doesn't go through drought.

Yeah. He's just. He's just fine with it.

Always wet.

Any. Any other notes from the booth for preseason week two or three? If you played in the hall of.

Fame game, don't care about preseason.

Okay.

All right.

That also makes us feel bad, Max. I know. I know how much of a loser I am to be this excited about Caleb Williams rollout pass, Roma Doonze, which was incredible, but I don't care. I don't care that I know I'm this much.

I mean. No, that. That pass was sick.

That pass was so sick.

That pass was sick.

This past was so sick.

There is a debate. We can embrace debate real quick. Are you talking about the test I'm talking about. No, I'm talking about the Olympics.

Oh.

In 2028. Oh, flag football.

Okay, wait. Before we do that, wanted to do. I wanted to hear your guys thoughts on a test that has been brought. This has to do with preseason, week three or two. I wanted to know what you guys thought, because this was a debate in my world. Did you see Simone Biles was at the game? Her husband, Jonathan Owens, plays on the Bears.

I saw she was wearing a Packers.

She was wearing. She was wearing a Jonathan Owens jacket who happened to play for the packers last year.

What color was the jacket?

It was actually, like, black and white.

Okay, so goes on it.

There was. Well, he played for the packers, so his. It was a Jonathan Owens jacket, and he happened to play for the pack.

There's a Jonathan Owens logo.

I think personally, just as Jo. This is a test by Simone Biles. Simone Biles actually doing a great job. She's seeing, hey, you guys got to start thinking about winning. You can't be worried about jackets. I'm going to go out on this field with a jacket and see if you guys can keep your composure.

It's all about the name on the back of the jacket, not right on the front of the jacket.

She should update her jacket. She probably. She has been a little busy. She had a walking boot on. Do you think that I should have been upset?

Yeah, I think you probably should have. Okay, if it was. If it had the Green Bay packers logo on it.

Well, it was the Jonathan Owens jacket who happened to play for the PaC.

And it had the Green Bay packers logo on it.

It didn't really. It kind of was just the helmets that he wore. It wasn't like a low. It wasn't like a kristen ju shuck.

Oh, there was multiple helmets on there.

Well, it was just like a collage of him.

Let me look this up.

It was him.

It was a him.

He happened to play for the packers last year. Again, I think this was a test, and I will not fail this test. I will not break me. I will not let it break the Bears fan base. I will not let us have. Have. We're about to enter the golden age, and we can't have a jacket. Bring us down.

Okay, I'm looking at this.

So good test, Simone. I like what you did. I think we passed the test.

There's a lot of pack logos on here.

Well, he played for the Packers. Jonathan Owens. He happened to play for the Pac.

If he went overseas while she was competing and he was wearing, like, a. A France jacket.

Well, she never played for France, so.

That'S a major playing in France.

But she never played for France. But one of those games could have been in Chicago.

So if it was a jacket with, like, pictures of miles in front of the net, in front of the Eiffel Tower.

That doesn't really make sense.

Elisa.

It doesn't really make sense. Look, she's got to update her wardrobe again. Great test, Simone. She's a nine time aw el.

Someone actually, one of these just has a. A giant Green Bay pack of his shirt. It's just a big Green Bay pack.

It could be the back of his shirt. Someone did point out that it. It was actually Hughie's fault because he didn't do Simone Biles, nine time awl, huge fan of the show. Huey didn't do. When we did faces in new places. He didn't do Jonathan Owens. So she might have not known that he was on the bears.

Got it.

So, Hughie, bad job by you, dude. There's a 50% chance she doesn't even know that these two teams have a rivalry.

Oh, why do you say that?

I mean, she's just. No, they. She lived it. She was. Jonathan Owens was on the Packer, happened to be on the packers talking about football.

She's. She went to a lot of games.

I think she just was busy winning gold medals for the US and being an olympic hero and she hasn't been able to update her wardrobe again. It's preseason. A jacket shouldn't divide us in preseason.

There's also.

She showed up regular.

There's also a very good chance she had the twisties again and she didn't know where she was.

Facts, if she showed up, might have.

Gotten lost and she thought she was in Green Bay week one.

I would have been upset. It's preseason.

Yeah.

Jackets, too.

That's true.

That's. I mean, that's a fact.

Yep.

You got to work out the. All these things we always talk about. Quarterbacks working out, different facial hair and weird shit. Patrick Holmes thrown behind the backs. This is preseason. Max said it perfectly. Who cares? It's like a Williams throw to roman doomsday.

It's like a Daniel Jones pick. Six of a jacket.

Fine.

And, and, yeah, that was. It was a classic. Daniel, I.

You know what? I don't know what's going through your head then. I was just thinking so badly that I wish it was regular season. I would have been able. Cause that was preseason. We talked about it before. You. You basically judge preseason. If your team, if your players do well, you're like, preseason matters. If your team does bad, you just ignore it. And you also kind of can't go at other teams for preseason. So it's like Daniel Jones through that pick six, and I wanted to make fun of it, but it's preseason.

It's preseason. What went through my head was the interview that we had with somebody that wanted to be the intern on part of my take, and he was a Giants fan. He's like, it's going to be great. Daniel Jones is going to be doing Daniel Jones things.

That's right.

And then me and big cat stopped and we were like, wait, were you saying Daniel Jones things are good things?

Yeah.

He was like, that's good. Daniel Jones doing Daniel Jones things. That's a good thing. This was a Daniel Jones thing.

Yeah.

This was like, the quintessential Daniel Jones thing.

Big time. Big time. All right. So I'm happy that we all agree that Simone Biles was just testing and. Good test.

Yeah. I think you just got lost in the air.

Yeah. He just happened to be. It wasn't a Packers jacket. It was a Jonathan Owens jacket who happened to play for the packers. Very big difference.

So, like, if a cop, let's say this was like a, you know, crime scene, and that's the jacket that they found in the crime scene, they would say, we have a Jonathan Owens jacket.

Yes. Like, oh, wow, look at this Jonathan Owens jacket. Simone Biles must have been here.

Did it have got to be the.

Only Jonathan Owens jacket in the world.

Have his name on it?

Yeah, it was all over it.

Well, his name, like, because there were pictures of him as a Green Bay Packer where it said, oh, he happened.

To play for the packers.

There was a giant just Green Bay packers logo.

It's merely a coincidence. She'll get it straightened out for week one. I guarantee that she doesn't show up with that jacket week one. And if she does, jail walking boot for her other foot.

Do you guys want to embrace debate?

Yeah, let's do it.

Okay. Embrace debate. There's a hot new debate out there because flag football is going to be in the Olympics in 2028.

Yep.

And we've heard from several NFL players saying that they want to represent the United States in that event. Like, Joe Burrow said it. In part of my take, I think Tyreek Hill has said that he wants to be on that team. One person that's not taking too kindly to this is the quarterback, the current quarterback of the US flag football team. His name is Darrell Hooch Doucet.

Who.

Who is five seven.

Wait, so a five seven man is upset?

A five seven man is upset.

Sound the alarm.

Yes.

Not good for history.

He's very mad. He said, I think it's disrespectful that they just automatically assume that they're able to just join the Olympic team because of the person that they are. They didn't help grow this game to get to the Olympics. Give the guys who helped this game get to where it's at, their respect. So he thinks that if Joe Burrow wanted to step in, he. He's not going to be good enough at playing flag football because he's too used to playing real football.

So. Okay. Hmm. So all he wants is respect.

He wants respect.

So respect.

Respect. Also the battle roll.

Holmes and Josh Allen, play quarterback.

Backup quarterback is the most popular person in town. You just might be getting more popular.

This guy, I feel like he timed this incorrectly. I know that it was right after the Olympics. He had to wait till like, like when they're deciding the team to start saying this stuff.

And there are probably some rules that are different about flag football from the NFL that you can exploit. If you know the game better, you can't tackle. But I'm saying if you probably gave Emmanuel Moore, might be, he might be.

Really good at football.

But if you, if you gave the good NFL players, like, I'm gonna say two weeks to practice flag football, I would.

2 hours.

2 hours to practice?

An hour.

They'd probably pick it up.

An hour.

I think if you took the worst NFL team and then made them the flag football team, they would probably win the gold.

Yeah. An hour.

Yeah.

I don't. Again, I think he mistimed this because now us flag football is gonna be like, we gotta get this guy to stop talking.

It all came from your boy Jalen hurts. Cuz your boy Jalen hurts put out a video where he had left like a football that was on fire. And he's like, we're bringing football to the Olympics. Insinuating that he would want to be the quarterback of the Olympics. I agree that Jalen Hurts should not be the quarterback. No, you can't do the tush push in the Olympics.

No, Jalen Hurts should not be our court.

No no. You guys are part of the media that just hates Jalen Hurts.

No, I don't. Actually. Enough interceptions to be good at flag football. Match, baby.

Pft. Maybe he should be because he's so good at seven on seven.

That's true in practice. Yeah, that's.

Flag football is essentially seven seven.

So enjoy your preseason, buddies.

All right, we will. We will.

I'm so excited for football. I can't. Why? There's a chance. There's a chance that how the Eagles finished last year is how they start this year, buddy.

So you want them to lose it? You want them to lose to the packers, week one.

Okay, you got me?

Yep.

Yeah.

God damn it. We're gonna stream that game. I'm gonna bet the house on the, on the Eagles. What's the line in that game? Ah, fuck, he got me there.

No, I can't, Max.

I would like the Eagles to start fast.

I can't wait for the regular season. I can't wait to play you twice, Max.

Yeah, that's gonna be a rut. We're gonna do that. That's a Thursday night rivalry game we're gonna do.

I cannot wait, buddy.

You don't mean that.

I do mean.

Yeah, he.

I'm very dumb right now.

He means it. It's the revenge for little, little you, small.

Yeah, it's revenge. Also, I know that a cornerback's name is Emmanuel Forbes, not Emanuel Mooretaindeh.

That's okay.

I knew that. But Emmanuel Forbes would be excellent at flag.

Yes.

Eagles minus two.

Love it. Hammer minus two. Hammer them.

I'm gonna take the alternate line.

Yeah.

I think.

-100.

I think they got the number right. Wrong team.

Oh, you're gonna take the packers.

No. Commanders minus two.

Oh, no, we're talking about.

We're talking.

I'm saying I can't. I can't wait to play you. Oh, yeah, that. That'll be an interesting game. Is it true that you're not allowed to wear green in Brazil because it's a. I think that was a gang thing.

That wasn't. Yeah.

Okay.

I think that was.

The Internet got us Jalen Hurts does have a brazilian ass.

That's true.

He's got big old and Saquon and. Yeah, while you're bringing the ass, you.

Guys might have the all ass team.

They should actually see that. We should put out a team. Brazil, at halftime. See? Yeah, just to see. Just to see if they could compete with the Eagles in the all ass department.

They might be able to.

I would like to see.

Yeah, I want to know.

I'd like to at least. I mean, competition is the best.

Hank, you'll be the least popular person. Brazil.

I get arrested.

Hank, you should.

What does this man have in his pants? Nothing.

If you want to be able to dunk, you should go to this game, get a BBL, and then fly back and you be the total package.

A jet propulsion BBL.

Yeah.

Do they have those?

No, that's. They do not have jets. You can put on your ass.

Hank, with a big ass would be fire, though.

Yeah, working on it would be.

He'd be looking right. Yeah, the huge ass. Okay. Anything else before we do who's back in the week?

I think that's it. Gordon Minshew is the quarterback.

Oh, yeah.

Raiders.

Garden. Minshew. Congrats to garden.

I think he's the perfect Raiders quarterback.

Yeah.

Like, if you want to get back to old school Raiders football, just have a guy with a mustache that doesn't give a fuck.

He's going to ball out.

He's going to win some games that you won't think he's going to win.

Yeah. He's going to give it his best and it's going to be fun to watch. Let's do who's back the week. It's brought to you by our friends at game time. Football season is here and we can't wait to get out some games this fall with the help of game time, the official ticketing partner, Barstool Sports. You know how much we love game time. Now with their brand new game time picks feature, they're making it even easier to get to a game. Game time picks filters out the fluff to show you only incredible deals on great seats so you don't have to waste time searching through thousands of tickets, looking for tickets. Week one, there's you can go to, there's all the games. I mean, the Bears are opening at home. It's going to be beautiful weather. Pull up your chosen event and turn on the GT picks setting at the top of the screen. Or browse the best local game time pick deals near you on your game time app homepage. What are you waiting for? We're going to go. We can't go to the Bears Titans. Let's look right now. Game time. Game time.

We can't go to that game because we're gonna be streaming it. But let's just say, why don't you pull up your commanders, your commanders opening at home.

They are playing at the bucks. Week one, I actually did put a bet in already on the commander season it is at Arizona. I think it's week three or week four.

Okay.

I love the commanders in that spot. Took a money line plus 114.

Okay. I just hit GT picks on the game time app. Some really good seats in the in like 250 range for Bears Titans. Week one, go see Caleb Williams first game. What should be a Hall of Fame career. Hopefully download the game time app today. Use code PMT to easily score great deals. New game time picks what time is it? It is game time. We are also brought to you by our friends at Viator. Viator is a tool you can use to plan and book travel experiences around the world. Our app and website makes it easy to explore 300,000 travel experiences so you can discover what's out there no matter where you're traveling, what you're interested in. Listen, you can just book a flight and be like, oh, I'm going to try to figure out there or you can do the right thing and there's nothing worse than a wasted vacation. You got to make sure your vacation, you're planning all the activities, planning the best hotels that all can happen at Viator. Viator helps you plan the perfect travel experience for you. Free cancelation helps you plan for the unexpected 300 plus travel experiences to choose from means you can plan something that everyone you're traveling with will enjoy.

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Yeah, I'm actually using it this weekend. My parents are coming. We plan to fund activity. Use Viator was super, super easy.

All right, beautiful. So Viator ten. That's Viator ten for 10% off your first booking in the app. Hank. If Hank can do it, you can do it. Who's back of the week? Hank?

My who's back the week is Connor stallions.

Oh, yeah, about this.

He was hired as a defensive coordinator at Mumford High School, which maybe Huey knows a little more about. It's Detroit high School, but he's back.

That's awesome.

That's kind of like a promotion, too. Yeah, from assistant to d coordinator.

I mean, he won a championship in.

College, but he didn't have a job.

That's true.

Books.

He did get a job.

He got a job. Yeah.

Out of all this, what do you think that interview process was like?

I'm gonna make sure we're the most prepared team in the state.

I'll cheat.

I would trust counter stallions with just about any job, actually.

And you got to assume that the, you know, president, whoever ad is hiring is, like, the biggest Michigan fan of all time.

Yeah, I. This bums me out a little bit because I. There was a moment in time last year where I really did think we were going to hire him at Barstool. And the way Dave was talking about his conversations with Conor stallions, like, I thought we were going to just give him an office upstairs, black out the glass, and just be like, we don't know what he does, and just have him just hand us reports every now and then about the competition, and just. No one ever gets to talk to him, and we don't know what he does, but just, like, let him do.

What he does with the Ernie Adams barstool.

It would have been great. I'm bummed out that we don't have Monstaff.

I mean, I honestly think that this guy could be a weapon in the gambling space.

Yeah.

Like, have him do one pick a week, go out, scout, whatever you want to scout. Unlimited budget. He's. He's a one man CIA stallions.

Pick of the week would have been fire.

Yeah.

Damn. All right, maybe. Maybe. So we got a root against him.

Well, I be.

He'll come back. Come here.

I can't root against con.

No, I like us counter sounds one of the best stories ever.

Does you have another manifesto?

I'm sure I'll get.

I'm sure he came prepared to. The interview with.

His cover letter was a manifesto. It wasn't, like, magazine letters that have been cut out.

Yeah.

Yeah.

He didn't show up with, like, a couple pages stapled together like other people. Yeah.

A full plan.

Yeah.

Mm hmm.

Yeah. Good. Who's back? What?

Hank, you didn't want to say that your boy is back.

Oh, yeah. Boo.

Yeah. Yeah. We got sign. I'm happy for him.

What, are you not gonna mention that story?

No.

You were so excited.

Where do you.

Back in the league.

Where do you sign?

For now, he's on the Sixers.

For.

What do you mean for now?

That is how contracts work. He is right. Everyone signs, like, a finite amount of time for their contract. So, yes, for now, he is on the Sixers.

You think him and Embiid are gonna get along well?

Of course.

Okay.

I mean, he's got all the confidence after dunking on LeBron. Are you a little scared this might be the championship piece?

No, I mean, that it's not gonna be, you know, the championship piece, but it's a great addition for the six.

You love yabu.

I love him.

Right?

So I'm happy for him. I wanted it back in the NBA.

We needed a power forward. I'm happy that we got him. The only thing I cared about was what Hank was thinking.

Yeah.

And he's upset because we watched that. We watched the French USA game, and every time Yahoo touched the ball, he was. He was a frenchman.

Yeah, you were.

You love him so much, and now he's. Now he's my guy.

For now.

For now.

You wanted Lebron.

He's mad. Doing the. He's not giving any eye contact towards your direction.

Yeah, I know. I was so happy. So happy.

You should get a jersey, Max. We put it up in the.

I should. I should get it. Yeah, you should get Sixers legend who no even knows what other taxes played for in the NBA.

You should get a jacket. A Jonathan Owens type jacket. But it's Sixers.

No, I don't think I. Well, I would get it the Sixers wise.

Yeah, no, Sixers.

Yeah.

Right.

Yeah, yabu.

Yeah. Get. Get a whole jacket of him in Sixers gear.

Yeah. Never forget, I sold pick out. Used to sell yabo shirts. I sold yabu shirts.

Yeah. How many?

Oh, maybe that's a shirt design for you, though, Max.

Yeah. We could repurpose that.

Yeah. No, I would love to.

Hank would probably buy one.

What was his career like on the Celtics, Hank?

He was. I mean, he was a backup, but he was electric personality. He was a great bench guy. He was. He was a great player.

Do you guys still be. No, we got perfect b ball Paul. Replacement. Where's be ball Paul?

I think he's piston.

Okay.

I think he's added. I think he's gotten a little bit better. He was the definition of just like, he was a. You just bang boards and couldn't shoot. Just athlete or no finesse.

Yeah. Yeah. Okay, good. Who's back? Good. Second. Who's back? Hank. Thank you, Max. Good producing, Max. Pft, my.

Who's back of the week is camping.

Oh.

Because we're. The boys are going camping this.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, we are.

Yeah, we're going camping. I think we're leaving Monday night, and we're getting back Thursday. Right. And we're in an undisclosed location somewhere in Wisconsin, and we're doing summer camp.

Mm hmm.

So we're gonna be competing in games. I don't really know what the events are gonna be. I know we're gonna be sleeping in cabins.

On a lake.

On a lake.

Fires at night.

Yes. So we're. The next two shows you're gonna see is us from camp.

Is there, like, a canadian camp that's across the lake that we can start a rivalry with? Go steal their shit?

Maybe across the lake or. Yeah, I guess.

Yeah, probably not, but, yeah, we could try.

I would like to start a camp rivalry.

Yeah.

But, yeah. How many people from Barcelona going?

Like 60?

What?

50?

I mean, there's, like, 20 competing.

It's a lot.

The boys will be there. Taylor and Will.

Very excited about that.

We might get a sober will on the podcast, maybe Friday.

Just to make sure everybody knows that he's not, in fact, constantly drunk. Just JJ check in.

We should get him hammered before it.

Yeah.

There are some people that have been internally, like, ski. I don't understand, necessarily what they're scared of. But they're like, what? Like, well, we need to know about camp. Shane asked if there was gonna be plumbing there.

Beams. Mom texted saying, make sure you bring earplugs in case people snore.

People will snore for sure.

Even just people. Some people were like, we're sleeping in cabins. They're like, what?

The most concerning part was that was the waiver that they had a sign.

That, oh, I didn't sign it, so.

I didn't sign any death waiver.

Did I sign it?

I think somebody might have forged your. In my signature, which is good, because.

All right, so it's on record that if we die, we can sue.

I want. I want to retain my right to sue Hank for anything that happens, because on this waiver, it says, you may encounter dangerous insects, you may encounter dangerous weather, you may encounter dangerous bodies of water.

How is the weather looking?

I haven't looked, but the insects part really freaked me out.

I'm excited. It's gonna be great. So we're gonna be live streaming after the yak on Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday. Thursday will actually be a taped finale, but Tuesday and Wednesday will be live and so tune in. It's going to be great. We're going to be competing. I think it's going to be. I think we're drafting teams PFT, me versus you.

All right.

So shorts. Yeah. It's going to be a lot of fun. It's good.

Like a good team bonding football season.

I'm very excited.

And so you, like, remember the Titans?

Yeah. So when you see the. When you want, if you watch us instead of listening to us, you'll see us in a cabin on Tuesday or Wednesday show and Friday show.

It's gonna be like training camp. Yeah, kind of like we should do a hard knocks for this.

We are gonna play a softball game on Tuesday night to see who gets what. The winner of the team is gonna get steak and lobster, and the losers gonna get a pack of hot dogs that they have to cook at a fire.

I'm okay with either one.

Yeah, but it's just a little competition. Yeah, competition, you know, gets everyone going. So, yeah, that's gonna. It's gonna be fun.

I'm excited.

All right. My who's back of the week is.

Wait, can we watch hard knocks?

Yes.

Okay.

We'll find out a way. My who's back the week is memes and the Busters guy. Cuz I think memes found the Busters guy.

You found the Busters guy?

We might have. So this comes from. Wow. At. Wow. Nice butt, dude. He said, my friend just revealed to me that he has 1.4 million points at Dave and Busters. He showed me the menu and said, get anything you want. The most expensive meal is 20, 2200 point.

Fuck, yeah.

That might be the buster's guy.

That's actually. You can retire right now if you're the buster's guy.

1.4 million point.

Yeah.

What is that? All right, I'm gonna do the math real quick.

But, yeah, you don't, you don't have to work anymore. You can just go live in a Dave and busters for the rest of your life.

Pretty much this guy rule. So 2200 points for the 636 meals if you got the most expensive meal every time.

Yeah. You could live in there for five years.

So, yeah, he's got me. He's got, he's got free food for an entire year if you want.

If you're doing, if you're doing like, the, the filet every night.

Yeah, yeah. The, I mean, this guy rules.

And also, if this guy's added Dave and Buster's eating every meal, he's going to be playing games and getting more points at Dave and Buster's. Like, that. Five years is probably too slow, too, like, little time. He could probably do ten or 15 years.

Yeah.

With all the points he'll be accumulating as he eats.

Yeah, this guy rules. I want to meet him. Hopefully he is the buster's guy, the actual buster's guy. All right, Hughie, finish us off before we get to our interview with Rosillo. My, who's back? John Madden. Yes. Only in football video games. Yeah. Nicolas Cage will be depicting the. Picking him. Yeah. Betraying him. Portraying. Yeah, yeah. In a movie, a biopic directed by David O'Russell. Same guy who did a silver linings playbook and the fighter. A couple other things like that. He's the guy who screams at everyone. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

But Nicolas Cage, he kind of, I.

Saw a couple pictures of him recently. Kind of. I could see a little madden in him. Yes.

Face start to sink a little bit. I'm looking forward to hearing him say, boom. I think he's going to give a great boom. It's John Madden.

Yeah. Yeah. I'm excited for this to be awesome.

Yeah, this is, I mean, John Madden is a national treasure and Nick Cage.

Is the perfect guy.

Yeah.

You're basically putting two of my favorite things together. Nick Cage and John Madden.

Mm hmm.

I need a graphic of John, of Nick Cage's depicting crossed out portraying crossed. Out portraying John. Matt.

Oh, I can't wait to hear the cage describing it. Turducken.

Yes.

He's got to go method for this. Right.

I hope the making of the truth.

I also hope they make it, like, very, like, I could see them trying to find, like, a dark angle.

Yeah.

I hope they don't do that.

I hope. Yeah, let's keep it light.

Keep it, like, I hope on.

I hope he's in character as John Madden. I hope that he's up in the booth actually calling games this season as John Madden.

Cool. That would be cool. Yeah.

Like, when they had Jake Gyllenhaal film.

Yeah.

Roadhouse scenes at a UFC fight.

Yeah.

Actually have Nicolas Cage, like, call.

Yeah, yeah.

Have it. Have him up there. He. Hell, he could just be in the booth by himself or with whoever's playing Pat Summerall and then just have him calling the game to nobody. I just want to see him as John Madden up in the booth.

Who would be.

Gotta be there on thanksgiving? Pat Summerall, Jimmy Fallon.

Who's out.

Oh, God. James Corden.

James Corden. Wait, he's, like, gone, right?

Is he?

I don't know. I think he stopped his show.

Oh, good.

Everyone's like, we've had enough of this fat british.

Yeah, we. I think we all, we all agreed to stop playing the prank on James Corden that we thought he was good.

Yeah. Right. Like, we don't have. We want a war so we don't have to do this.

Yeah.

Okay, good. Good. Who's back? What?

Who's the guy on NFL Fox?

NFL Fox.

Tom Brady.

No, the old guy. Greg Olson from the Steelers.

Terry Bradshaw.

Yeah.

Maybe Terry Bradshaw playing Pat summer. Oh, yeah. I don't hate it.

Okay.

Yeah.

Yeah. I. You don't even. You don't even have to get him drunk.

Yeah.

Yeah. Just let him be. Okay. Let's get to our interview with Ryan Rosillo before we do that. Pft, you got a couple. And we're doing the Mount Rushmore. Best feelings after that. Yeah.

Before we get into Racillo, he's brought to you by our great friends at Coors Light. I love Coors light. The mountains are blue. Coors Light is the absolute best beer in the world. It's great during the summer, it's great during football season. It's great if you're sneaking out to a baseball game in the middle of the day, grab an ice cold Coors light and follow the blue mountains to happiness. It's chill. Time to choose. Chill. Go to Coors light.com take Coors like.com take. It's the best time of year to have a Coors light. I had a couple Coors lights on Saturday night at the wedding. We were drinking beers. The mountains were blue. It's great for wedding season. Love Coors light. And people sent us some cooler pictures and blue mountain pictures this weekend. Absolutely love those. Check it out. Coors like.com take. Coors like.com take. And now here is Ryan Rosilla.

Okay, we now welcome on very special guest, one of our best friends in the whole world, birthday boy. Birthday boy. It is. Ryan Rosillo.

Thanks, boys.

You look great. Why'd you wear that?

Well, it's a combination of things. Like, you know how you want to reinvent yourself every seven years? Van Pelt told me that one time.

Yeah, like Madonna, right?

Every seven years.

Every seven years. I actually saw something recently. I'm really into earnest answers on Twitter lately.

Okay.

And there was this interview, and this woman was like, what voice pattern is this? I want to start maybe talking like this next year. And, like, you got all sorts, you know? And imagine if you had a friend was like, what are you just doing different speech patterns? Although I had a roommate in college after Google hunting, like, blew up. Like, he's like, you don't really have that kind of accent. He's like, dude, it's back. What are you talking about? But, yeah, no, I'm just figuring out light, lighter tones, pastels.

Tell me about those shorts.

It's a mesh cut. And it also, if I were to fall down, I'm good.

It looks like a grandmother's sweater.

Is that the loosest shirt you've ever worn? I don't think I've ever seen you in a shirt that, like, you. You wear tight shirts.

Well, you work.

Yeah.

So what am I supposed to do?

Want it? Yeah, but happy birthday.

Thanks.

Is this how you expected to spend your 49th birthday? Is it 49 for real or is it 49? Joke. Haha.

You know, when it's five oh, your next year.

I would have guessed like 43.

People have said my maturity level. They're blown away. And I was like, oh, cuz I look so good. And they're like, no, you look damn good for four more because of, like, just your whole deal.

Yeah. Well, I hope we know when you turn five oh, because you. So it is your birthday, right? We were planning on doing this pod today, and then yesterday you texted me, you said, hey, I actually forgot that tomorrow's my birthday, so I think we will hate we should hang out for my birthday. I was like, yeah, how do you forget what day your birthday is?

I didn't forget like that. If I had to fill out paperwork, I would still know it. But it just was one of. I just gotten back from Spain. Everything was fucked up. It was one of the worst sleeping experience I've had since, I think pledge week, hell week. Pledging. You don't sleep a lot during that. But some of you guys who quit wouldn't even fucking know what I'm talking about.

It's basically fudge training. Yeah, stay with your heartbreak motel.

I can't take you seriously.

It's better than that you guys originally gave me.

It's also better than you showing your balls to everyone. Like, the last time I thought about.

It, I thought about it.

Yeah, we put, like, a filter on it, so that's not gonna happen this time.

You and Bob Stoops, the two bit, the two biggest, like, ball reveals on. Pardon my take history. Bob Stoops just had a fucking moose knuckle in our. In our fans face for a half hour.

That's good company.

Yeah, that's true.

He won a natty.

I remember. I've interviewed Bob. I was in Norman, and it was like, right when these offenses were getting out of control, and so everybody was giving up way more points, so the defensive minded coaches were, like, losing it. And Oklahoma, you know, traditionally stoops the whole deal. And so I was out the night before with, you. Remember Kevin? Was it Kevin White?

No, not Kevin White. No.

Come on. Hall of famer Kevin Wilson. Kevin Wilson, the offensive coordinator, ended up being the head coach at Indiana. So, like, somebody boots on the ground was like, you want to go out drinking with these guys? Norman? And I went, yeah, fuck it. Like, the staff will be there. So I'm having a few beers, and it's a bunch of the guys on the staff, and they were like, you got Bob tomorrow. And I was like, yeah, I. 15 minutes with Bob in his office, and they're like, well, let's go over the questions. Let's prep. And these guys have been drinking. They were like, ready to go. And I prepped it out. They're like, oh, that's a good one. That's a good one. And then I got to like, hey, I've noticed, like, on average, you're giving up way more yardage per play than you ever have before. Like, what's going on with your secondary? Can you actually, like, hang with the sEc? And they're like, oh, my God, that's. He's gonna kill you. You can't ask him that question. And so I did ask him it, and he hated it. And we were in his office.

I remember he's like, what you fail to realize is, you know, but he did make a good point that they were just running so many more plays. He had a lot of watches, too, from all the bowl games.

What does. What does that have to do with his balls, though?

Well, I like that he stuck up for himself.

Yeah, there you go.

So I think there's some similarities there.

That's probably why he came back to the USFL. They don't score shit there. Yeah, nobody gets scored on because the offenses are bad.

Stoops.

Stoops, though, really did have, like, a complete makeover. Like, he went from, you know, if you were an Oklahoma guy, you loved him.

Right.

Could kind of give a shit about anybody else. And then once he. I mean, it took him a little bit longer, or maybe it was just transit. Maybe it's going to be what we see with Belichick. Like, everybody's going to love the lovable Belichick now, right? You're going to be like, all right, but what does that mean?

Stoops also has that. I mean, the crazy story is his daddy died of a heart attack while coaching, like, on the sideline. So his whole thing was like, I'm gonna retire before, like, I get to that point, so. Yeah, that's heavy.

Yeah. But I ended up really liking him. I. And I didn't in the beginning.

Okay.

That's what people think of me when they see my balls.

No, when I see your balls, I think just. All I think is balls.

Yeah, I actually think. Okay, so he didn't do steroids.

Thanks, man.

Yeah. You know, because we would be able to tell. All right, so happy birthday, and I.

Thanks for bumping Trump for me this week.

Oh, yeah, no, no problem.

Were you guys was having on?

Oh, yeah, we were.

We're gonna have him on. But we have actually a very surprised birthday guest for you. Donald Trump. Yeah, bring him.

There he is. We actually know we did want to have you on, though, because we don't.

Talk about the race.

Well, we don't dip into politics, but we wanted to do a little election preview with you, so.

Yeah. Okay.

Who you got?

What do you think? What do you think's gonna happen in Pennsylvania?

Well, I think a snapshot of any polling number right now is gonna really answer this. It was like, if you look at the Vegas odds, which I actually think are really interesting with it.

Yeah.

The swings in a very short amount of time. It's because no one, no one side can keep their shit together for more than three days for like.

Yeah, but.

But who is. Who are the swing votes right now? Like, who has not made up their mind?

What is it?

Pennsylvania?

Yeah. One county.

Isn't it always? Your place was. Yeah, this is where we're all going to expose ourselves.

Florida's up for grabs. That's what they said.

That's what they say.

That's just one guy tweeting. He's like, I think Florida's up for grabs. Like, all right, dude.

I do love the polling of one, though. They'll like, have. And I'm talking either CNN or Fox. They'll just throw somebody in some place. Like, there's a perfect example. I think there was a somebody from Fox went to interview, like, five women that if you hooked up with, you would never tell anyone ever in your entire life. Okay. And I'm just trying to paint a picture here.

I hear you.

And so they were like, is Harris a candidate for you? Does she speak to you? You know, woman. Woman to woman here? And they were all like, no, she sucks. She's an idiot. And I was like, okay. And then the reporters, like, did any of you vote for Hillary? They're like, nope, couldn't stand her. So you're like, okay. And then it gets play.

Yeah.

And you're like, man, this. This Harris is not as popular five in fucking Arkansas that were never voting for her anyway. Like, what?

It's when. When people who are, like, highly political online do Twitter polls. Like, Clay Travis will be like, who are you voting for tomorrow? It's like, well, that's your audience. Like, if I. If I did a poll, be like, you know, do you like the bears or the packers more? Yeah, that one might be. No, but a lot of packers.

The pulling of one shit that we see.

Yeah.

We're like, they had another one where it was a white guy in a black barber shop and they were.

That was hair that was so fun.

It's so fucked up. And he's wearing, like, a Jordan. Yeah, the guy's trying to fit in.

This guy was trying to fit in to. He put a Jordan T shirt on underneath a sport coat.

Yeah, right.

And then he went to a barber.

Shop, not a narc.

Yeah.

And he's like, do you guys think that Kamala Harris is black? Yeah, go on. And it was the most uncomfortable minute of tv.

Hey.

And then, like, four guys may not like her. And then he tosses it back to studio, like, well, this election's a wrap. We just touched. So I don't. I don't understand, like, the polling of one phenomenon that we have where this is kind of my point about the Super Bowl. I say this like, we shouldn't ever be allowed on the air hours after the Super bowl because in that window, we're incapable of having any perspective. And it's why I always make fun of, like, after championship. So I actually think the rate of speed that we have with information is making us dumber.

Oh, yeah.

And this isn't, like, the most enlightening thing you're ever going to hear, but I don't think whether it's how you feel about a team historically or a player and their accomplishments historically. But if you relate it to, like, what's happening right now in an election year, like, I don't know, that the tides are turning nearly as fast. Everybody's pretending it does day to day.

It's every. Yeah, everything is fucking madness.

I love it when you do the. Is this the greatest championship team of all time?

Yeah.

Seconds after it's over, I get people.

To earnestly be like. Because I'll. The joke is always like, you have to ask.

Yeah, you do.

Yeah. You always have that. So that. That was actually my next question.

LSU. People mad at me being like, are you serious? What about 19? LSU? And I like, dude, you explain it to me.

You're an LSU. Yeah.

Well, you guys are the biggest. LSU.

Yeah, we are. Day one hurt you.

We were coach. Ho.

Guys, that stung.

We're not. We're not LSU guys.

That's why.

Very open.

We talked about it.

You like?

I like BK a lot.

You like all BK.

I'm not gonna summer house with him, but, I mean, I like him and he's always been really good to me.

Okay, you family, y'all fam. Y'all can.

Hey.

There's nothing I can say.

I did have a question for you, Ryan. Are we sure the Celtics are good?

Here's my question. If they win the gold, does that mean the Celtics are even better?

Well, it's interesting you brought that up, Ryan, because I did a little research just before you sat down here, I went back through some of your recent takes. This was from early July.

Ooh.

You tweeted, is Tatum the best international player in the world?

No, I didn't.

You tweeted that?

Well, you want to know why? Is because Simmons was saying that he is the best international player, and so then I was making fun of it.

Okay.

In the tweet.

Didn't get that.

Yeah.

You don't get that context.

No, there wasn't supposed to. That was only for the audience of the Sunday.

Okay, let's. Let's.

Let's have an actual intelligence with Joe House and said that Tatum should get LeBron's minutes.

Okay, well, he also, with me, was like, who's going to start, Tatum or Lebron? I was like, are you serious? And he was making. Tatum was the best international. Like, his whole thing was, he's the best international player. I laughed, we argued. It was fine. But then I used it in a tweet.

Got it.

Yeah.

Got it. So, yeah, that kind of takes the sting out of it a little bit.

Yeah.

Especially when you get a DNP. That would have been good. You could have made me look bad.

Yeah.

So is the US still good at basketball or is it just Mickey Mouse?

I don't understand what you're asking.

You have the easiest schedule of all time. I'm not sure this team's good.

Who are we supposed to play? And I said, we?

Someone.

Better yet, Greece has.

Your borders are. So I look at, like, Canada. Right?

Like, women don't owe me shit.

That's so profound.

For the record, if you're listening, I'm wearing the hat that says, women don't owe me shit because it was Ryan's hat, and then he didn't want to wear it. Yeah.

After my. After. Well, what does it say?

Women don't know you.

Women don't know you shit.

Oh, wait, I should have worn it.

Yeah.

That's a great hat.

Oh, that's actually. Yeah, you're standing with women.

That's not a gander hat at all.

Look at me.

Ryan refused wear this hat. Can you believe that?

Misogynistic. We read it a totally different way. Fuck.

Oops.

Women don't owe you shit. That's.

Dude, I wish.

Way to stand up.

Your intern is so proud of himself dying.

Hughie. He's a gem. Young John Candy.

He's just looking at us. He's so happy with these outfits, you know? That's a lot of power.

Big WNBA guy.

How do you feel about Angel Reese? Caitlin Clarke?

Want to say something?

Huey, what do you. What do you think about that rookie of the year race?

He has a podcast. It was called NBA hole. There was. And then when he realized WNBA was a league. What? Last year? Yeah. He added the w. Yeah.

For the hole.

So it's NBA hole. Wh.

How did it do to do any numbers?

45 people. Yeah. And how many of those were your favorite number.

I listened to it back, like, three times.

Two or three times.

You get to understand how I was, like, talking and stuff my beats, and he deleted it.

Stuff to do.

He accidentally deleted 200 episodes. Brutal.

You might be better, though, in the long run.

Yeah.

Based on what you guys are telling me.

Yes. Yeah.

I love Angel Reese.

I think she, like. She has, like, Rodman level rebounding.

Yeah.

I fucking love her.

I think Kate and Clark potential to.

Be the face of the league. She's not there today.

She won't be there tomorrow.

Three, four years away from being half of that.

She'll be all right.

She'll get her way up. But angel. Angels. My baby girl should be a 20.

And ten every day.

So you're voting her rookie of the year? If you had a vote.

If I had.

Yeah, if I had. You should have a vote.

Yeah.

He clearly knows ball.

Would you call her baby girl in a press conference, cuz?

No, that would be.

Okay. Good job, huey. Big WNBA guy.

Angries.

Yeah.

Baby girl stuff. It's tough to go back and listen to yourself.

In the beginning, he did it all time. They deleted his own episode.

It just makes you have to work that much harder to build up the library again.

Yeah, I have a. I have. I have a take that I would like to take back that. I think you were right.

Conference realignment. Yeah, I did that rant again today.

Yeah.

It had been.

You might. You might be right on that.

33 different teams.

You might be right.

33 teams have changed conferences since 2001.

Yeah. Now, my take has always been, I'm gonna watch it no matter what. And I love college football, and I agree. What? But you are right that this is the first season where I'm like, what the fuck's going on? Like. And it's not even. It's the USC, UCLA. It's the Texas Oklahoma. It just feels off. Feels weird.

My point was always this, okay? It's much like the playing game. I didn't think it was right for a team in certain years with the ten seed is going to have such an abysmal record compared to the team that has the seven seed. And you're like, you still have to kind of prove yourself one more time, even though it's weighted to win one game at home and then another chance. But, like, if the ten seed just. I don't know. The right thing happens, you're gonna go. Okay, so, a team with 36 wins gets into the playoffs.

Right.

Team with 50 isn't. Remember that happened to the Cardinals. And the Dodgers, they had to like the way the baseball playoffs were one year. They both had like almost 100 wins. They had to play one game. And you go, what the fuck is the point? There was what we just did for six months. That stuff I cannot stand.

There was a 2015 year where the Cardinals, Cubs and Pirates all had, I think it was like 98 wins. And then we beat the Pirates in the one game playoff, and it was like, they won 98 games. How's this? Yeah.

And now you're done. Yeah, you're done. Like, I just did this for six months. So my point is that, like, when the Lakers and in Golden State were going at it in that awesome Curry LeBron playing game, I wasn't having a bad time watching it, right? That's not the point. The point is the structure, that it exists. And it's the same thing with playoff expansion. It's the same thing with all the realignment. Like, I'm still gonna watch for twelve plus hours on Saturday. But what I loved about the sport was that a Pac twelve game looked.

Like a Pac twelve.

No.

And then culturally, when you would visit all of these different places, the fan bases were lined in a very conference, like, it just made sense. And. And I remember Connell telling me that the whole conference thing was SEC creation. And I'm like, dude, I'm telling you right now, maybe I'm guilty of the polling of one thing here again, but when I was like a crazy big east guy in the eighties and nineties as a kid, and then into college, like, I hated Syracuse and Georgetown. I love St. John's, but I still wanted to see Cuse and Georgetown beat Acc. And it was kind of this fun, additive thing for the tournament. And look, maybe it won't matter. Maybe younger people will just be desensitized to the whole thing. But when the ACC Twitter feed is congratulating Katie Ledecky, saying the limits are made here, you're just like, what the fuck?

The death of the Pac twelve is really the part of it.

Like on.com. did you hear my. The state, they have the standings. Pac twelve standings. And it's the two teams. It's so embarrassing.

Yeah, well, not even embarrassing.

It's sad.

It's sad. You're right. So you were right about that. Thank you.

I just felt like you were part of the halves and the haves had a hard time.

That's.

I admitted one percenter.

I admitted that. I admitted if I rooted for a team, that if I was an Oklahoma State fan, I would feel a lot different than being a Wisconsin fan, being like, I don't think. But you know what? Now with how crazy it is, I could see a world where Wisconsin does get left out with it, whatever the next iteration is.

That's the other part that sucks is that there's, even though it's expanded. So I'm going to lose the argument here because you're going to get some teams in, but like the Penn State model the last couple years, Rogers, like, who have you beat? That's actually really good. Last couple years, as soon as you actually play somebody that has athletes that can match or outmatch your athletes, then you just don't win those games. It's going on a couple years, but the end of the year you're like, oh, cool, we're nine and three. Or we're, you know, eleven and two. Wonderful.

We beat undefeated Iowa at home, you know, 30 to nothing.

Exactly. And because Iowa finds a way, because of how bad that side of the.

Big Ten has been, now miss the Big Ten west.

Yeah. Because it's, it's awesome if you're decent, because you're like, now we're going to win seven games, and if we win the two non conferences that aren't power fives and that's nine wins, and we don't even know if we're any fucking good, and then you're ranked 16th and then Penn State beats you, and then it's like, penn State, wow, great job. And I guess, like that team, it's not going to happen now because the conferences are too tough between the Big ten and the SEC. But I think there's going to be some expansion, like, playoff slots where we're going to be arguing about teams that may not have beaten anybody remotely good team.

All they did was lose close to good teams and like, oh, well, they.

Lost 14, Ohio State down 14. And, like, they don't care that you score the touchdown.

Yeah. What we'll see is maybe, maybe a couple, like, very entertaining early matchups where the two teams are, like, similarly mismatched against each other, and then the top four teams are just going to kick the shit out of everybody in the second round of it. But we might get one more fun week of college football.

Look, it's still going to be fun. Like, everybody that's been on me about, oh, why don't you want expansion? We have it in the other division or the other levels of college football. And I go, okay, but I'm still, obviously, I'm not going to protect, hey, let me know when the first round's over mad about it.

Right.

There's still going to be.

You're going to watch.

It's the same thing as the plan. I just.

And home games are going to be cool, but I think really fun. Added wrinkle.

I think it kind of, I almost like the false hope sometimes of a Wisconsin in the right year or if the SEC east was down and this is like pre Georgia, post Florida in that window where they weren't great there for a little while, but now whoever that team is, is like buried.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I mean, it's set up for like, they did a, I think they went back 20 years and they're like, who would have made the playoffs and Wisconsin would have made it like seven out of the 20 years. Yeah.

This is actually great for Penn State.

Yeah. Yeah. It's the, the quintessential team that will benefit from this.

And people will say to me all the time, like, oh, well, what about the NFL? I'd be like, you think I love a nine, a seven, nine and 17, like, playing in the conference championship?

Yeah.

I don't, actually.

Yeah. But the NFL is different because you've had wild card teams make those runs and win Super Bowls. So, like, if you get healthy, does the mark, the difference between the best team in the NFL and the worst team in the NFL is a lot smaller than the best team.

Absolutely. Absolutely. But, like, I would ask, like, going into Ohio State, Michigan this year if they're both really, really good.

Yeah.

How are you going to possibly feel the same way?

They're going to play again next week.

Nothing's at stake.

Yeah.

Like, how does that not hurt? And this is the thing I cannot answer. I can't answer it with live rights for the NBA or the NFL or, like, even people were theorizing, like, we had even heard, like, how come these owners are selling these teams? Like, oh, wait, are they hearing that the new tv deal actually isn't gonna be that good? And you were hearing like, a couple more teams were even available that haven't even been sold yet. And I'm thinking, like, oh, wait, this might be the bubble. Like, everybody's a bubble expert. Post a big short and everybody just keeps bubble, bubble, bubble.

Read the book.

Great job, Reed. Boomerang. You love that.

What's that?

That was the other Michael Lewis.

I only read Michael Lewis books because they always make movies.

They never did. I don't think Boomerang is a tough script. Maybe McKay can pull that one.

I probably won't do it.

So what's boomerang Boomerang is, I think, the extra research involved with, like, different economic failures around the world. And it's so great because we're also reading it after the result. So it feels like every single page. It's like what they thought this, like, this is the dumbest idea ever. Like, they were going to start some resort, I think, in Ireland, and it was, like, near the water, and there was, like, this one sheep farmer who lived there, and they tried to start it all up, and it was a fucking disaster. And then the guy was like, I've lived here my whole life and I've never wanted to be here. One day I didn't know why a resort was. And then Greece, during their nonsense, they don't pay taxes. Yeah. And when I went to visit Greece, which was a long time ago, I was. I just finished boomerang. So I was like, hey, what's the story with you guys? I know it's not a popular topic for me. My brand. I was like, what's the story?

Well, these are international taxes. Yeah.

Yeah. I was like, what's up with you guys here? Like, you don't. You don't pay any taxes. And every guy I met was the only guy in Greece that paid his taxes.

He's like, no, I do, I do, I do, I do.

I gotta read Boomerang then. Yeah.

Boomerang.

Did Michael Lewis get. Oh, no, it was the blind side. It came out. Way out. How did that not come out right away? That he was, like, good friends with the twoies? That was the whole thing?

Oh, yeah.

That all came out last year where it's like, oh, actually, he's, like, very good friends with the family. And he just never said that.

I love Michael Lewis books.

Oh, they're great.

But. And I've had him on, and I love that he's been nice enough to come on with me. But, like, when I read moneyball, the first thing I thought of was like, how come Barry, Zito, Hudson and Mulder never get fucking mentioned?

And.

Or Tejada? Right.

Yeah.

But it was really about, like, you have three ones in your rotation making no money.

You drafted great pitches.

Like, they did. They made the entire movie, too. They didn't even show them on screen. I don't.

Right.

Dude, Molder on the back.

And it just kind of speaks to, like, how we can all work. Like, somebody had said this recently about John Oliver. Like, John Oliver's monologs are probably the best in the business.

I saw this, all right.

And they're unbelievably convincing until he does the one on the topic that, you know. Yeah, so if he did an NBA one, because my range is rather limited. I was trying to check the pre market in Japan going, I don't know what I'm fucking doing. Like, just go to bed. Like, wait, so our yen debt is what? Like, carry the tube? Like, you're fucked. Just turned this off. When I saw that Oliver point, I was like, yeah, maybe if I knew more about, you know, international smuggling. Yeah, but I don't. But goddamn, an accent. Yes, on HBO. I can't hang with that.

I saw that, and then it bummed me out because then I thought about people who listen to us, who are experts in whatever we're talking about.

You guys, you admit when you're not.

That'S very, very rarely wrong, though.

The craziest. True, true. Very rarely. The craziest thing to me is that, like, when we go, when we travel, the amount of, like, NFL scouts or, like, college football, like, coaches say they listen. I'm like, why? Like, how could you just laugh at how stupid we sound? Like, you have to think we're the dumbest people in the world, but you're.

Not presenting yourself like the rest of us. Like, I try to present myself as, like, I've got it. And if I'm wrong, it only means the data was wrong, not the analysis.

I think. I think the scouts and coaches is like us because they. They listen also to, like, serious sports talk radio with people that present themselves as geniuses, and then we are just the much, much more dumb version of.

Right.

Hey, look, when a GM says he listens, I apologize, too. Yeah.

I always feel bad. I'm like, there's no way that we're saying anything that you think is interesting.

Because think about, like, the way the media is covered. Like, if they're in the world of podcasting and you or I, big cat, will text each other and be like, can you believe? Like, did you see this? Like, here's a perfect example. Fuck it. I'll just say it because I think it's the funniest leverage leak of all time. There was an article recently about Stephen A's new contract, and it was like, if they can't figure it out, he may go to politics, he may go late night, or he could get into acting. You're like, you know what? You're like? That's one where you push back and go, I mean, he's going to sign for a huge number because he's really good and he's really valuable. And he draws eyeballs whether you love him or, like, he. He works, right, but acting. Cause he was on General Hospital, a couple episodes. Like, come on, we should.

For us. Ourselves next. No, after I do porn, after I.

Saw that, I was like, you know, whenever I'm up here, I'm gonna. I'm gonna leak. I'm gonna leak something to somebody I don't like. Yeah, but when you see our world covered, it makes you just cringe. Like, that's not even what happens. And so though, even we talk about sports for our entire professional lives, like, I can watch a game and have a feeling about a player, but the number of times where somebody's been nice enough to be like, hey, I heard about, like, what you said, and I understand how you got there, but actually, like, this guy was, like, doing this and then this other thing, and you're just like, fucking a. Yeah, we have no clue.

Yeah.

So don't listen anymore. Subscribe.

Except skip Bayless. He knows what he's talking about. Rip skip bay.

Are you okay?

Uh, no, I'm not okay. Thank you.

I think you guys appreciated it way more than I ever thought you would have. I mean, him, his whole thing.

I never was the biggest skip guy. Pft is more of a skip.

I just appreciate him. That's exactly right. I don't like Skip Bayless. I don't. Although he was very nice to me. The one time I met him, it was at. We were in Bristol.

Yeah.

You got some juice, though.

I did.

No.

No, I don't.

Everybody was kissing your ass.

No, no.

Data juice.

Well, this was 2000, AJ.

After juice.

2017 was probably the date of juice.

This was 2014.

Yes. So, so very.

Yeah. So no one knew what I looked.

You guys even doing there?

So I went up there because we won an auction to do a behind the scenes tour of first take. And so I went up there. I just sat. I watched them tape the show, which was wonderful. It was the day that. What's the dude's name on the jets punch Geno Smith in the face. Okay. In Impala or whatever.

Yeah, yeah.

Broke his jaw. And then they had a very mature conversation about that. Skip and Stephen a just yelled at each other for about 3 hours. And then afterwards I went up, introduced myself to him, and then skip just sat down, start asking me about, like, where I'm from, what teams I like.

We know you were in the media, though.

No.

Just thought you were random.

He thought random guy. But we talked for like, like 15 minutes and just had like, a conversation. He didn't have to do that. So I was like, okay, skip seems like a good guy, but, no, I've never been, like, a fan of skip, but I appreciate how crazy he is.

Yeah.

And what an insane person to have on tv. We're so lucky to get. Watch this guy, the one person in the history of the world that thinks that LeBron sucks and Tim Tebow is great, and there's nobody else that does that. But he truly believes that.

I don't know if he truly believes it. You're never gonna get me there.

You don't think so?

Yeah, that's where I always falter, where I'm like, I think he's a, he does a good job.

When he said Bronnie's more clutch because.

Of Call of Duty, like, that's a great take.

It's unbelievable.

That's a great, I mean, I give.

Him credit for getting great take because I wasn't, I wasn't going to workshop that one on the pad at any point.

And, well, he only. He beat Grant Williams, who I still don't know why Grant Williams there. I had to double check to make sure that he wasn't in the summer league still.

Well, not in summer league, but apparently he, like, wouldn't leave the call of duty booth for, like, days. I'm not. Yeah, maybe he just was like, look, you guys can get shots up. I will, too.

Yeah.

What do you think about the fact that brawny goes by brawny, like, in the record, in the, the box score? It's B. James. It's not L. James.

Hadn't really thought about it.

Yeah, you should consider mine when we saw it. By the way, another take that you were right about. Bad idea for us to try to do anything with Espna.

That was just me being competitive.

That was our juice days.

Yeah.

We're going to get back to Ryan Risillo in a second. He's brought to you by our great friends over at Chevy. There's a reason why we've never done a Mount Rushmore pickup trucks. That's because for part of my take, there's only one pickup truck. That's the Chevy Silverado. Why is that? Well, Silverado is a partner. They've been a partner with us. There'll be a partner with you. They're a partner that you can depend on. We've all spent time driving, using the Silverado for all kinds of part of my take. Jobs, adventures, other shenanigans. Silverado has been our ride for a cross country trip to the big game. Silverado helped us dig the biggest hole ever in the state of Ohio. Last year at grit week, Silverado helped us give full backs the recognition that they deserve with the low man award. And this year, Silverado went out west with us for our latest grit week. We drove it all around southern California, drove it to the ocean, drove it to the golf course, drove it to Rams training camp and back. Silverado brings the grit. It's legendary grit. It's paired with modern truck tech, inside and out.

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It was a bad idea. You just were like, be careful.

I said be careful.

Yeah, you're right.

Because one of the most fucked up things that happened when you guys were brought in, because it was hilarious. Like there's, and I think big cat and I've talked about this, I don't know if t and I remember we were talking about moneyball and somehow we ended up here. But I don't mind. We were talking bubbles. I'm still aware, but I don't care anymore because this is more fun. So when big cat and PFT showed up to ESPN, like, because the show was already gonna happen, right, right. And there was a guy in the talent department who I thought was, like, my guy. And everybody on air was always trying to find, like, their person, inland talent department to be like, hey, like, when I'm up, can you. Can you. Not that they were gonna name the price, but, like, he needed a voice in the room. That was always the goalie. ESPN. I need somebody with some fucking juice who has a voice in the room that's gonna be an advocate for me. And if you don't have that, it's never gonna happen. Happened for you there. But they were also incredibly obsessed with whoever didn't work there and killing.

So there was a stretch where, like, you guys are blowing up and they're thinking of, like, how do we just hook into this, right? And at that point, I still would stay, like, ESPN has the draw. Like, I still think ESPN is an incredible opportunity.

Yeah.

I mean, let's not.

There's something about being on tv, on live tv that, man, it goes a lot of places that podcasts don't go.

Whatever, you know, you can. You're gonna have issues no matter where you work. Okay. And when it's front facing, it also, like, puts an added pressure on it. But however, I felt about, like, bigger picture things when I walked in the door that day and was like, I'm gonna talk sports for 3 hours. Like, it was. I didn't have many. Just was never like, I can't believe I have to work today. Okay, right? But when you guys were walking rocks, I'll never forget this. Now there's buzzing, and now it's every fucking on air guy going, what's going on with those guys? They're gonna be doing something here. Like, what's up? And we're becoming friends, and we see each other, we hug it out, and I'm kind of like, oh. And I knew I was never gonna get, like, any special stuff, so I didn't get too upset about it. And then a guy in the talent part was like, you're boys with them. And I was like, yeah, like, you know, we're boys. He's like, I gotta get big cat cell phone number because I want to, like, talk to him. And I was like, yeah, like, fucking done.

I'll get you on a text thread tonight. And so the day wraps up. I think we were. You were round or something. You came back to see me at the studio, and another, like, higher up saw that we were hugging it out in the cafeteria or something, and he was like, is there any way you can get those two guys to, like, join you once a week, like, your contracts coming up, but, like, if you could lock those guys in to, like, visit you once a week. I'm like, I don't know. I may be kind of a big asker in New York, like, every week. And so the guy that asked me to get your number, I go to big cat, and I'm like, hey, you got to talk to this guy. He's really plugged in, kind of knows what's going on. And big cat's like, yeah, dude, I've been talking to him for a month. He already negotiated a deal for the van talk tv show.

Yeah.

And I was like. And what he was doing is he was actually covering his bases, trying to make me seem like he had nothing to do with the opportunity, because I would have been somebody. They would have gone like, oh, Racillo is going to be pissed when they get this opportunity. And the reality is, it's like, that was not an opportunity that I was going to be given. I couldn't be mad about you guys getting a chance to shine there.

We were so fucking dumb.

Yeah, we were dumb.

We were.

That's also so shitty.

You should have gotten paid for the entire thing.

That's shitty that they go, like, they're so concerned about playing the internal mind games and politics that they will, like, gaslight you into thinking that things are happening one way when they've been operating. Like Game of Thrones behind the scenes. Yeah, like, nobody should place like that.

The truth, and I'm not even saying it's specific to them. I just think it's a management tactic. It's like, wait. The truth of, like, this is way worse than just.

Right.

We gave these guys a tv show, and, like, I know you want a different opportunity, but at that point, like, I knew and I didn't want to get into all this stuff again. It's just that I told you. Look out.

Yeah.

I was like.

And we were dumb. Do you remember so dumb.

The list of stuff that you gave us when you brought us onto your radio show the first time, and it was like, bringing outdoor cats inside at ESPN radio. And they. You guys had a very helpful list of things that we couldn't say or do on the air. Do you remember that?

I don't know. I think I was asked to give it to you guys.

One of them was literally no peeing.

Yeah.

We weren't allowed to pee in the studio, and they had to write that down.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Which, because I was pissed.

No, no, it wasn't. This was not your doing. It was like, I don't know if it was production or, you know, what.

Would have been great, because you don't know this at the time. It's still ESPN. You're kind of figuring out. But, I mean, the joy in all of the story is that ultimately, you didn't need any of it.

No, it's the best thing.

Right.

Whenever we say it.

But they had to ask you to not piss.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Right. That's where we.

It's funny that they thought, like, yeah, we should. We should put this in writing.

And then we couldn't burn. We couldn't. Like, somebody should have pushed back.

You should have Hank be like, hey, most of this is good.

I'm gonna have my attorney specifically.

No, it's. It sounds cliche, but every time I. Anyone asking him, like, that was literally the best thing that could happen to us because we learned it very fast early on that our audience is our audience, and we don't need anyone else. And it's like that and timing wise.

To right was right. Like, if it would have been ten years prior, you would have needed it. Correct. And actually, you would have had the entry point that you have now because ten years ago. Well, I don't know. We can get.

No, but it's true.

But, like, the stuff moves so fast, and, you know, whenever I was up, I remember there were times where, like, it was getting down to the deadline of, like, me having to say yes or say no, and you want your ego. You get in the way. And then I'd be like, like, dude, if you don't get to go back and you're gonna be, like, starting your morning watching sportscenter, like, be honest with yourself.

Yeah.

It's like, I don't care if you date somebody else. Yeah, you do.

Yeah.

And I would just resign.

Yeah.

Until I didn't have to anymore.

And we appreciate you having our back. There's only a couple people.

Well, I do mean that. Like, I think there's always a lot of competitiveness, and there's. I think sometimes jealousy can be good. Like, it can be a driving force if you're competitive, but you don't want to let jealousy start telling lies. Like, you guys are sitting there going back to, like, I can't believe these guys. Listen, your interviews are better than everybody else's. They're better than mine. You know, I'll speak for myself. I'm not going to start saying, this is why you're better than this, but you have, in a very short amount of time, establish yourself in a way that you can interview things, but you're not. Like, I remember I tried to get one coach on with you. I was trying to help you. This is like pre Ojron. I'd never fucking do it now. But.

We sold. We stole coach o from Ryan.

Yeah. But gave him. Yeah, there was like.

It was.

It was tough for me because it was like right after they won the national championship, and then we were, like, all walking and you guys were, like, setting up to interview, and we all made eye contact. And then, oh, his right hand guy looked at me and it's like, yeah, I've been the guy going to games out of my own fucking pocket for 15 years. But, no, this is cool.

But I did get. I did help Derek get his next job. Did you?

Well, at that point, he was your guy.

Yeah, that's true.

So I got coach o, though, in July, and then they made me edit out the best answer. So it's basically the same.

Yeah.

What was that answer?

Oh, how would he do against Tommy Moffat in a fight? And it was awesome. The answer was incredible. Was actually, like, the best part of the interview. And then they called me after and they're like, hey, can we just cut it out? I go, dude, no one actually thinks Coach O is gonna beat up Tommy Moffat.

Yeah.

Like, it's. It's the best part of the interview.

Right.

But because of my LSU ties, you know, I want to protect the family.

Right. Yeah.

And then I was like, well, hopefully if you guys win another national championship, I can get him in the July after that one, too.

So, wait, what was his answer?

Oh, he's like, I smacked the shit.

Out of something like that.

I mean, he gave you the perfect coach.

Oh.

Answer. Yeah, the whole thing. And it was. It was like, great.

Yeah.

I think he also hyped up Trump a lot. They said, keep that in.

We want to divide the. Tommy Moffat.

I think there was, like, randomly Trump came up. I did not bring it up. And he was just like, yeah, he was here practicing. Man. He'd make a hell of a football coach.

It's awesome. So, so seriously, you have no regrets at all leaving ESPN?

I can't believe we're here again because I feel like I've done all this already have.

I don't think we have.

Yeah, I know, but I think we.

Talked about Barstow van talk and how you had our back, which I do.

Yeah. Right.

Something that forever will, you know, that was our lowest point. And, you know, the people that have your back and you and Scott both had our back. And so whenever someone's like, oh, I thought you guys hated ESPN. It's like, well, I don't like ESPN, but there are some certain people there that I will die for.

And some of those people have apologized to you, by the way.

Yeah. Yeah.

Which I think is fascinating.

Yeah.

I've already talked a lot about this, so I know we haven't really done it. There's just not really anything left for me to say about it. Like, it's been five years. The only day I. I've missed it. There was only one day I was in my car where I was like, God damn, I wish I was on the air right now. It was after Westbrook sucked in an elimination playoff game, and I was like.

Live radio is live radio. There's something about.

But I was thinking about this today because I was listening to live radio, and I still listen constantly. Like, dude, the day I was done, I was in the car listening to other people. Like, I never. It was just time, okay? It was just time. And I had no idea if it was going to work out or not. I felt like the floor, for me, was fine, right? I felt like, hey, whatever. My floor is. And I have other interests and all the other stuff that I've tried to do and want to do, which is certainly taking a lot of time, too. I wasn't because I was older, I really was at, like, peace, and I kind of needed. I needed to just be gone.

Yeah.

Because it wasn't.

You did the half in, half out for a little bit. Yeah.

And that was kind of the funniest thing at the end, was because the radio show was the end of 17, and I knew that was happening, so I was like, whatever. But then I was under contract, and then my buddies were like, why don't you just go to the southe, south of France for eight months? I was like, I'm not a. I'm not, like, a big enough of a deal to just disappear for a year and then pop back up. And then I did a podcast, like, after we all kind of calmed down after a couple weeks, and it was actually all like, nobody was really mad or anything. And, look, they wanted Stephen a. They didn't want me, and I understand it. So I was just too young. I was only 42, right? 42, 41, 42. And I'm like, I'm too young to be going in. In the wrong direction. And luckily, the podcast kind of timed it out right, and I was able to move to Manhattan beach, which is something I wanted to do. For, like, 20 years when my buddy got traded here and I came to visit him, and I went, I can't believe, like, this is a town that people live in.

Yeah.

And so I was like, maybe you just move. You just move. And that's it. Like, I mean, it sounds lame, but I cut out a picture of, like, a real estate guide of, like, the dream home in Manhattan beach, and I put it in my fridge in Connecticut, and I looked at it, like, every day for five years. I know.

Vision board.

Did it manifest? And life advice happened, which is one of the best segments in any podcast.

Not the most original thing, but it works because of Kyle and Ceruti.

Yeah.

And it's what made it good is that it was the wives and girlfriends that don't want to listen to my NBA monologs were like, I went from walking down the street to wives and girlfriends going, I fucking hate you. You're on in the house and in the car non stop to, hey, you're the only guy we can agree to listen to on a road trip. We don't listen to the beginning part.

Or whatever, but that's. I mean, that just triggered a memory. One of the greatest segments ever done, the who's the jerk with you and SVP and Stanford. Steve. And the question of who hates you more, Ryan, women or men?

Yeah, that was. That was unbelievable.

That got you so bad. I.

You know what's funny, though, is, like, I missed that stuff because I felt like that was really cool stuff that we were doing. Like, we did an entire segment of the show where we did, like, two segments or something. I go, let's just keep trying different shit. Like, I remember pitching who's the jerk to Van Pelt in the parking lot at a and M for the Mansell Alabama game. That was the rematch after he'd beat them in Tuscaloosa. And I was, like, really driven to constantly with the radio show be like, let's keep trying. Like, different dumb shit. Like, let's figure it all out. And then they'd be like, meh. And I'm like, how do you not understand how fucking funny? Who's the jerk? Was like, it was so good.

No one cared.

No one in management. Like, there wasn't one fucking person that went, hey, that thing you did today was awesome.

Yeah.

And that's when you're like, hey, I know this works. Like, my instincts are good. Like, why? Why are you not? But, like, Mike and Mike were so dominant, and every middle manager and up management person loved cowherd because he was more aligned with them, life experience, age wise. And that's something you always have to remember, like, when you're in creative things. Like, I think the best creative managers can be like, I don't get anything you're doing, right? But it fucking works, right? So let's just keep doing your thing.

Dave has never listened to a single episode of pardon my take.

No, he doesn't know. I.

He doesn't. He doesn't. It's not for him.

Can I tell you a Dave story?

Yeah.

So I was back on my old stomping grounds of Vermont. Burlington. Means a lot to me. I go back, wait, I thought you.

I think it's LSU.

No, no. Football team at Vermont. So I'm allowed to pick one.

Got it.

That's true.

You do get that.

No. Since 1974. So there were a couple younger dudes that were excited that I was at my friend's bar and I used to live, like, above it. And then I'd get stuck on a level in grand theft auto. And I would walk down to his bar and like, have a couple beers. I'm like, I'm fucking stuck in the parking garage, dude. You gotta take the drone. And I'd be like, all right. And then I'd set my alarm at 11:59 a.m. like, all right. Up bright and early. And this girl comes up to me, she's like, are you Dave Portnoy? Because all these younger guys are really excited. And I was like, I'm not. She was disappointed that I was.

Should have gone with it.

Should I?

Yeah. I'm like, wait.

I used to love it when you did the Boston accents. What segment was that? UnsVP.

State of the nation.

State of the nation.

Election year. Yeah, pulse of the nation.

You'd have like, dropkick Murphy's playing in the background and just yell at each other for like two or three minutes.

Radio show. It really was. I listened to it in my car during my lunch break.

But, like, this is the kind of the lesson and all that stuff is that the show, the first two years was as good as people remember?

Yeah.

Okay. Because that stuff takes a really long time. Like, it actually takes a long time. Like, Scott and I were not friends. He had just heard me filling in and he liked me. And there was this one segment I did ironically, looking at everything that it said was the greatest Super bowl, greatest tournament, greatest golfer, greatest all these. Although Tiger is probably a pretty good choice at that time. And I went through like twelve different things. And I'm like, there's no way we're this lucky that we've had these twelve things happen in the last calendar year. Like, there's no way we're this lucky. And Van Pelt, like, called in, but we had, like, a hard break. We couldn't take them. And then he saw me and he was like, hey, that was really great. And he came up, they were going to give him Torico slot because Turiko couldn't keep doing everything that he was doing. And I still think Tirico, if he just said, hey, I'm just going to be radio guy, I think he would have been, like, the best radio talk show host, but he's doing the Olympics and world championships and everything, so that's probably a little bit cooler.

But I remember, like, Scott's a watch everything guy. I'm a watch everything guy. Scott's probably a little insecure about transitioning from tv to radio. I'm insecure just because I feel like, what do you guys think, I'm the fucking help here? Like an elf in the North Pole? Like, oh, I got shit to say.

Yeah.

And so we're the we watch everything guys battling it out. And this show was okay. But there was this part after, like, two plus years where he told some story about, like, getting filmed by a bunch of, like, high school kids and little crossf outfits in the Chipotle in West Hartford, and nothing makes it matter. So he starts videotaping them back. I'm like, that's psychotic. Like, you videotape the kids back, what are you doing? He's like, how do you like it? And I'm like, yeah, but they're not on tv. They're not, like, one of the most popular tv shows in the country. I go tell, you know, tell this story and you tell those stories, and then you start to realize, like, you can watch games and have sports takes and all that stuff, but, like, you have to figure out a way to get your personality in there. And, I mean, you guys are the best example of that going. But it's, it's weird to get the buy in if nobody knows who you are. Like, day one, I'm gonna be mister personality. Who's gonna care about all these things? But when you start fucking around more with radio shows.

Yeah.

And podcasts and you just go, like, the best segments we have are probably, before we even start live advice, we just check in with what Kyle's up to. Yeah, that's the best stuff.

Yeah. The b you want to be, you.

Want to know more investing that time, it's.

It's more than like, when I explain to someone what my job is, it's like, pretty much just being a guy that people want to hang out with. That's the key, is, like, we would need to do a podcast where people want to listen and be like, I could be friends with those guys.

Yeah, and you guys have a higher approval rating than I do.

I don't think that's true.

We actually get a lot of that. You were talking about earlier, a woman coming up to be like, I can't stand you. There's so many people that we talk to. Like, it'll be a guy that comes up, gets his picture taken. His girlfriend's taking the picture, and she's like, he makes me listen to you guys all the time. Yeah, we get that a lot.

A lot.

We're really complimenting each other a ton.

Right?

Yeah.

So the real reason we had you on today's. I'm having a fourth kid. No, I'm just kidding. Fuck that. No way.

Why not? You got the money for it?

It's not money. It's.

Four kids is like, a lot.

Three kids a lot.

I'm the only five threes.

A lot. You think?

Five. Basketball team.

I would you.

Because I've heard JD Vance. He was calling you a cat lady.

I know. You might lose me.

Do you have a cat? What's your cat's name?

Be careful, JD. You might lose Ryan.

No, you know I need it. Montezuma. I just got done reading conquistador. Buddy Levy, if you check it out.

I don't know if you're. You might have a cat.

I think he does.

Remember we went to your house after Covid and we were the first people to be in your house in, like three years.

I know. I gave myself an extra year of.

COVID No one was built better for Covid than Ryan.

My friend said the same thing. They're like, you're fine, right?

Yeah.

But then I, like, another year went by and I was like, are you guys are going out? Oh, shit. You start saying no to too much stuff. I'll tell you right now, if you. If you're going to be by yourself with a fucking cat, say yes to more stuff.

Yeah.

Those calls stop coming in.

Yeah.

And then all of a sudden you're like, all right, I don't have any kids, and now I have any friends.

Yeah.

So, yeah, I named the cat after montezuma because I'd read this book and I. I'm gonna share something. I've been having a lot of colonizer guilt lately. You guys know I'm talking about.

Yep.

Yeah.

Although I feel like Spain just gets a fucking pass the big time, right?

Big Spain.

Spain absolutely does. It's only because they, like, they lost some wars in the United States, right?

Right.

The Netherlands, too.

Oh, the Dutch are everywhere.

Yeah. Huge reserve.

You know who gets the passes? Belgium.

Yeah.

Reserve currency.

It's crazy.

Tulips.

We. You should do that. You should try that out.

Just tulips.

No. Hey, you know what? Why don't we talk about the Dutch? They colonized.

I may go there next year. We'll table it.

Okay.

We'll table it. Because I don't want to get off the plane and being like, yeah, it's fucking like, you know Helsinki, right?

Yeah.

So you smoke a lot of weed? Probably not. It just never happened for me.

You're red light guy.

No, I don't. I mean, would I admit it?

Probably not.

No.

At some point. At some point. At some point in a monolog, I think. Feel like you'd let it slip.

Yeah, if I did like, the travel log and there's just a missing part.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That'd be a good.

It was a redacted file that would tip it off. Yeah. Yeah. So you're turning anyway on Tuesday and then you should skip all day.

So it's Friday. Let's pick it up. Hit the gym a couple times. Found this great court, played with this guy.

So you turned 49. Me and big cat were 39. So it's only.

Wait, I'm a full decade, you guys.

Yeah, yeah.

But I got started too late.

When you're. When you're in the nines, you do. At least for me, when I turned 30 and I feel like I'm having the same experience turning 40. I spend like, the entire year when I'm 29 or 39 just thinking about like, oh, shit, I'm almost 40. But then when I turned 30, I was like, oh, it's no big deal. Like, yeah, fuck it. Who cares? But is there anything that you want to do that you want to, like, any new projects, any new things you want to get into in your forties?

I have good news that I can't share. Like, it's incredibly good news.

Very good news.

Yeah. So it's just not finalized yet. And scream means a lot to me.

He's getting a second cat.

Because the cat, you know, you know how lonely the one cat. This fucking guy's not dating somebody again, hates you. Well, it's just like, hey, man, I can't be there for you all the time.

I think that cats hate everybody.

Not a dog.

I kind of want to go on a. I know the news. I kind of want to go on a hater revenge tour on your behalf. Would you give me permission?

Yeah, absolutely.

Okay.

Once. But I just don't know. Like, if I try to do everything I'm trying to do, like, you get the yes, and it's like, yeah, but you need the bigger yes now. It's. Yeah, just. It's like fucking Q Bert.

But just let me know because I'll hit that button. You already do that to me all the time. When you send me a tweet knowing that I'm going to quote Jedi mind Ryan. Ryan's like, this guy pisses me off. So he just sends it to me, and I'm like, oh, fuck, it's on.

Or the dune voice. Can somebody confirm? Did Star wars rip off Dune?

I haven't seen.

There's not one guy in your crew that doesn't know the answer to that?

I don't know what Dune is.

I've never seen. He said yes. Hank said yes.

So that's true. Because I read something that was fairly convincing, but I don't know that I want to be convinced of anything anymore. Yeah, that's kind of where I'm at with this flow of information. You could be telling me the best shit ever. I'm like, I don't want him.

Yeah.

I don't want to fall for it.

I don't want to get too high. Too low.

But, yeah, I have the. These aren't the droids you're looking for. And big cat'll just send the tweet. Yeah, like, hey, you know, it'd be a funny tweet is this. And then he just does it.

It's a good attack dog.

And then I just end up online for the next 3 hours. Like, I didn't even mean to do.

It originally until he kept doing it, then admitted it, and then I was like, all right, well, now this is, like, too much.

Congratulations on the big news.

Well, I. There's. Now I need bigger news.

Yeah.

The first part of the big news is a big deal for me. Me.

Very happy about that.

I probably need to keep pushing myself professionally to fill whatever fucking void or third therapist would tell me that I have, which I can already figure out on my own. So.

No, you don't need a therapist.

No, I'm good. I already know everything. They would say. Pretty fucking obvious. And I'm like, way happier than I've. I mean, this is the question you're asking me, but, like, two through the specifics of, like, the age thing. That's funny, because I was the youngest guy until all of a sudden, overnight, I was like, now I'm older than everybody. Yeah, but that's also because most people are like, you know, people with kids don't invite you to stuff because they don't think you would even want to go. Right. Why would you even want to come to this? But I. I've worked really hard on this thing, and we'll see.

All right, so we got to wrap this up. I mean, it's a. It is awesome. We. We love you. Ryan Roback. Question. Last question, and we'll get out of here. Rho back.com promo code. Take 20% off first purchase cues. It's polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts. One answer. Who wins the NBA title next year?

Ooh, that is spicy.

That's already. You don't. You've used all your words.

One. One answer.

It could be a team.

It could be a team.

It could be a one guy.

North America.

North America.

I think it's really, really tough to repeat, so I'll just say nuggets.

Oh, okay.

I like it.

Do you do bracketology for football?

It's gonna be challenging.

Yeah.

I love how the other sports try to capture the magic of the 64 teams.

You can't do it.

Like, NFL.com will have them. Like, hey, did you finish your bracket? Be like, okay, it's done.

Yeah, but listen, there's a. There's a lot here now because Joe Lenardi, he pissed me off last year. He admitted that he was going to sleep during a conference final game, and it was just like, what? What do you mean you're sleep.

It's the one day he asked.

You're literally. This is, this is it. You get one week. He's like, I'm going to bed. Like, what the fuck? Saturday, Saturday. Saturday.

The night max, I were so mad.

Saturday, conference.

So he's like, going to bed. Like, what the. I think was he missed the Oregon, that. That crazy triple overtime game or. No, that was in the tournament. Either way, he went to sleep on conference championship Saturday. And so someone, some young whippersnapper is there for the taken.

Young whipper snappers are everywhere.

Yeah.

You know what? They're also cheaper, too.

That's true.

Yeah.

Placement level whippersnapper.

Yeah. I don't know. I imagine there'll be somebody that they'll try and I mean, this, like, in general of like, hey, we're gonna pretend that the projection of the twelve teams is like, dude, I could do this in five minutes. Right? That fucking hard.

Alabama, Ohio State, Clemson, Texas, Michigan, Michigan.

I just can't wait for the 1213 14 team arguments. Maybe two lane and there's gonna be a 14. Colorado, like, a team ranked 14th. You're like, you stink.

Yeah.

You haven't beaten anyone.

Yeah.

And you want a chance for the national champions.

Don't forget about the six point loss.

To Ohio State right when they were up 14.

All right, Ryan, you're the best. Everyone go subscribe to his podcast. Ryan Raisilla podcast. And yeah, let's go celebrate your birthday.

Sounds good.

Mount Rushmore is brought to you by Buffalo Wild Wings. Book your fantasy football draft. Party at Buffalo Wild Wings to get a fantasy championship ring. Book at buffalo wild wings.com fantasy. B Dubs is football. Let's go. Sports bar. Book at buffalo Wild wings.com fantasy. That's buffalowildwings.com fantasy.

Okay, Mount Rushmore time. It is getting late and tight in the Mount Rushmore season. We have six Mount Rushmores left. The standings are. Max, who's clinched 61 points? I have 53 points. Pft has 45. Hank has 41. So Hank is four behind. Pft. Yep. Reminder, the points go 4321. So, Hank, if you win this and PfT loses this Mount Rushmore, you only be a point behind. So each one matters.

It does matter. Big.

I'm not, and I'm not clear either. I could. I could have a all time choke job and falter down the. Down the last six ones.

So, Hank, we let Hank pick this one.

Yep. He's went with Mount Rushmore of best feelings. And Hank is up first, weirdly.

Go for it, Hank.

Yeah, I'm up first.

How you feeling?

I feel bad. I feel. I feel nervous. I feel paranoid, but I feel excited. I'm excited to have the opportunity to try and make the most of the season and go on a late season run.

Talk right there. Yeah, I'm excited. I'm honored to have the opportunity.

Yeah. And you are.

Just got a peak at the right time.

I am excited. I am happy that we had the moment of clarity a couple weeks ago, or it was last week where you just came clean on the fact that you're bad at this, so you lash out and you accuse everyone else of everything. Because tonight when we were picking it, you came in and accused us of cahoots. Cahoots. Cahooting against you.

Listen a couple times where you're like, pick one, and then I pick one. Then you just say what you want to do.

No, we ended up with what you wanted.

I know, I know, but that I was.

Okay, wait, flag. Yeah, I go on the play.

Thank you.

Because. Because Hank gets coddled to and catered to. That's more than anybody in Mount Rush.

Happy.

It's always. It's always big cat being like, hank, what do you want to do?

Yeah, what do you want?

What do you want to do?

You have.

You are coddled when it comes to mount Rush.

Only reason I said, you know it's true.

Oh, how many of the mowers was have I picked this year, Hank?

The only reason I protested today, I picked those ones. I think you. I think we've done this before, which.

Was a different one, which we're not doing.

But then you admitted that it was too close. Yeah, I was right.

Right.

So apologize.

But you still want to do mouth. Yeah, but it's. I apologize.

I was trying to help you with the other one.

No, I said I'm paranoid. I'm paranoid.

Yeah, I said.

I said we should not.

Not paranoid, but I'll admit that I am paranoid.

Accusing cahoots.

I said that we. I offered up because I did ask.

Felt like cahoots.

Well, I asked. I said we should just do the Mount Rushmore of words that start with b so you could pick boobs. One. One. I was trying to be your friend.

But I was in the room. This is. This is also nonsense. That would. It doesn't matter for the podcast listeners.

Oh, they love this. Are you kidding me?

This was a conversation. I was in the bathroom taking care of business. You guys were in the same room. And big cat was usually when he's, like, pressing to do something that he wants to do, all of a sudden, pft, who was in the same room with big cat. It felt like they guys had come to a game plan and then said, you know what?

I said that was a good topic.

And I wasn't pressing. I said, let's do B word so you can get boobs.

All right, so. So in conclusion, Hank, when we say.

You are told you, when we say.

Let'S don't do this topic, you're like, that's bullshit. Then when we say, yeah, let's do that topic, you're like, it's.

I know. I was good with it. I'm like, all right, but I felt like cahoots. Like, usually when you guys let me.

You guys.

When you guys were like, okay, it.

Sounds like we can't exist.

Usually when you guys are like, you.

Know, ft is exactly right.

I told you I was paranoid.

You are paranoid.

Okay, Hank, best feelings, Mount Rushwar.

I also feel like I figured out the cahoots, but we can get to it.

There's no cahoots.

No, we'll get to it at the end of. Because I could be wrong. I probably am.

You are. My motto is running the ball.

I'm going with the theme. You know, the listeners, I hope, appreciate it. I'm just going. Feeling boobs.

That's why I said the b word.

You left a massive.

I know. Yeah.

Your gap at. No, at the second big. Now Max gets one. One.

This is your three. Your three. Mount Rushmore. Topics that you wanted to do was simple pleasures, best feelings. And then I was like, let's just do b words. Cuz you just want to do one. That you get boobs.

Yeah.

Okay.

That I cannot believe. Like, I almost don't even want to take this. What are you doing? What are you doing?

I. He just. His brain is just thinking it's boobs. He's like, if I get boobs, I win.

That's why we should have done b words. What?

What was that, Hank? This is the most obvious one. You pick this because it.

Because what happens after you.

Yes. That is what feels better.

Just a pressure.

That's a high pressure situation.

No, it's not. Having sex.

One.

One.

All right. What does that include sex?

You want. What do you want? Like head.

Yeah.

Getting your dick sucked.

Where your ass eaten.

So this is just gonna be like different forms of sex throughout this entire Mount Rushmore.

We'll all get sexy. He'll just have feeling. Boo.

All right, so Max, you get all of sex.

Yeah.

I mean, I don't care. I don't care.

All right.

You get all of sex.

Take all sex. Just so it's a little bit of variety on this about rush.

All of sex except tf.

Yeah. He would never pick that. Yeah.

You hate that.

Do you understand?

Yeah, I knew that's. I realized. I realized.

But when did you realize?

I just. That's what I said. I'm sticking. I stuck to it. I kind of realized.

I know your brain so well. Then when you said best feelings, I was like, that's what you guys talked.

About in the room.

All I said was pF.

That conversation happened in the game.

Here's exactly common.

I was right about the.

No, you weren't, because you said best feelings and I said, pft. He just wants to take feeling boobs. So why don't we just do b words?

But then why do people say feelings?

Because he was like, he's.

Honestly, I knew you were gonna take boobs, and then Max was gonna have that.

And that conversations happened.

Correct.

I. Yeah. Because it was obvious what you're. It's not cahoots. We just accurately.

Stupid. You are. Yes.

But you guys are acting like when.

The weatherman's like, it's gonna storm later on today. Are you like that weatherman's in cahoots with God?

Let's just get on.

I think.

Hey.

Doing this on purpose for content.

Yeah.

The way that.

That.

I cannot believe that you just did that. There's no way you're this dumb.

Your vision of compass. Headphones.

Your vision. Your vision of cahoots. You knew what the wrong pick to make was, and you still made it well, though.

Paranoid.

Yeah. He didn't know till after.

Oh, I. Yeah, whatever.

Still took feeling boobs.

Yeah.

Which is a good feeling. I'll give you that.

Yeah.

Great feeling. Fourth round, the best feeling.

Yeah. Okay, so Max has sex, and Hank has feeling. Boo.

It's a good pick, Max.

I still don't believe that Hank did that. Like, that had to have been on purpose.

Yeah.

Okay.

There's a lot of good feelings.

There are a lot of really good feet.

I got a lot of feelings.

Me too.

Yeah.

Okay, I'm gonna go with right. When you get drunk.

Mmm.

That's a good feel moment. You get drunk.

That's a good feeling.

So, just being drunk.

Yeah.

Drinking, drinking, drinking is my. Is my choice. Drinking, drinking beers.

That's a good. That's good pick. I like that one.

Thank you.

I like that one.

It's no sex.

Okay, so I have two. Okay.

All right.

When the perfect song comes on. When the perfect song comes on, it could be at a party in your car, like, you know, when it happens. When the perfect song comes on for the vibe.

But match the.

That will be the exact pick. When the perfect song comes on for the vibe could be nostalgia, anything. There's just no better feeling than just like, damn, this song. And then my second one. I'm going to go with the 30 minutes before the NCAA tournament. Tips off.

That's good pick.

Great feeling. Great fucking feeling.

Everything.

I'm going to win everything. This is the next. The best four days of the calendar year. Just love that feeling. Bottle up that feeling. Sell it. I would take it over feeling boops.

Not me.

Okay. You don't like sports. I love sports. And you love women.

I love sports.

Okay, your next pick.

All right. My next pick is going to be your dog greeting you after you've been.

Gone for a long time there. Yeah. Yeah.

It's a wag at the door moment. Blake does his tail in a circle when he's really happy.

Yep.

When I get that circle tail going, he cuddles in.

Yep.

You feel like the king of the.

World jumping on you. Yep. It's great. Pick, Max.

I'm gonna go.

Oh, that'd be great. Picking meatballs in another draft. I've won.

I'm gonna go.

Winning a championship.

Yeah.

Okay.

That's a great idea.

As a fan.

Great feeling.

As a fan or a person playing.

I'm just gonna say winning a champion.

There's a difference, I think.

No, you could take winning it championship.

The fans are part of the team.

That's true.

Yeah. We say we.

Big part of.

Yeah.

They're actually the team. Right, Hank?

I'm gonna go with waking up Christmas morning as a kid had it.

That was gonna be my next good pick, Hank. Here we go.

Let's rebuild and payday.

Oh, yeah.

Nice one. Nice one. Especially if you don't pay taxes like Hank. Paydays extra, got zero. Okay. Good picks, Hank.

Thank you.

Kind of bringing this back around. Yeah.

I am going to go. Leaving work as you start a vacation.

Yep. Yep.

That's a good pick.

No, I'll actually push back a little on that, just in the fact that I hate traveling.

Okay.

Like, I like getting to the. Like, getting to the vacation.

Like, opening the hotel room.

Yeah. You're, like, landing at the vacation is my favorite. I.

Arriving at a vacation destination.

I don't know that I think it's more so. It's less so for us, but more so for people are like a nine to five, but, like, 05:00 hits.

Yeah.

On, like, and you're. And, you know, you have a week off is got. It's, like, the best.

Yeah. I just hate traveling so much.

All right, I'm going to go. Similar kind of, to Max's pick. Quitting a job you hate. It is a great feeling, especially that drive away from work. I remember when I quit my job that I hated. The last job I hated, it was. I don't think I can ever replicate that feeling in my life.

Yeah, great one.

I would. I would do that over touching boobs all day.

Great one. All right, I got two. I got one that I have to do that you guys are probably gonna be like, but I have to do it. But here's the other one. This one is tells me this is kind of the inverse of winning a championship. This is showing myself as a loser. But watching your enemies or rivals fail is a great fucking feeling.

Your enemies arrivals.

Yeah. Enemies slash rivals or lose.

I thought we were saying enemies arrival. Like when Aaron Rodgers went out on the field the first time. Jets.

Yeah. Watching your enemies slash rivals lose is such a great feeling. It's just a great, great feeling.

Yep.

Okay.

I'm the Mount Rushmore of hater moves. Would be a good one.

Oh, yeah, that's a good one. That's a good one. All right. I will do. Okay, I won't do the kids one. I'll save the kid ones for honorable mention. I'll keep it straight here. Walking into a bachelor party that 1st. 1st night hour of a bachelor party, where it's just they can't. You can't get better vibes. It's not hungover yet.

It's similar to the. The NCAA tournament. Yeah, it's like, this is gonna be awesome.

Old friends, you haven't seen him forever. Everyone's ready to fucking rage. No one's. You know, cuz by like, day two, you've already lost a couple people. Yep, there's some stragglers. Day three, you're like, I just get me the fuck out of here. But when you walk in like that Thursday night. Oh, drink a million beers.

Mm hmm.

Usually the reason, usually the vibes are so high when you walk in that it ruins the rest of the bachelor party because you drink so much.

You try to chase that.

Yeah.

Should I take becoming a parent? I feel like that wasn't my one, but feel like it's got to be. I might say for Hank, I'll save for Hank.

Yeah.

What do you mean?

Yeah, you can take becoming a parent.

Why would I take that?

Okay. It's a good feeling.

I. I had a parent when I'll save for honorable mentions. I wanted to go straight. I wanted to play on the equal playing ground.

Okay, I will go with.

You can take it.

I'm not gonna take it.

You won't.

You're right, I won't. I'm gonna go with getting a call or text after a first date from somebody that you really like.

Mmm, nice. When she texts first, maybe after feeling her boobs.

Maybe you haven't felt the boobs yet, but that's a sign that you will feel.

You could be feel. That's pre boobs.

Pre boob.

Holy shit.

Really excited about feeling those boobs.

A great feeling. Just anything that implies boobs will be felt.

Yeah.

Yeah, this is. Mine's gonna be pretty niche.

Okay.

But I don't care.

When your favorite player signs with your team.

Nope.

It's best feeling in the world is hitting a home run.

Ah. I did have walk off home run. Just.

Yeah, just like the feeling, like this split second when you know you got one, and it's like, fuck, yeah. That rocked.

Yeah. When it hits.

Perfect.

Okay, hank, your last pick.

I will go with finding cash and a pair of pants you haven't worn a long time.

Wow. Okay, so payday and that.

You're rich, you're greedy.

It.

Money is great. Yeah, money is a great feeling. And either seeing money in your account or you put on a pair of pants, you're like, you know, maybe it's the spring. You haven't worn these shorts since last, you know, summer. $20. Boom.

Can I throw one out that I thought you were going to pick there?

Sure.

I mean, puring a drive is such a great feeling.

Yeah, it is.

Hole in one.

I'd rather pure a drive.

A hole in one.

Yeah, hole in one.

I mean, we've never felt that be stolen valor.

Yeah. Yeah, that would be stolen valor. But puring a drive was on my list where it's just like, when you fucking hit. Just crush one down the middle. There's no better feeling.

It's true.

I thought you'd have at least a golf. Maybe you just don't love golf.

No, I don't.

Moves or golf for the rest of your life? Come to your head. Can never touch a boob again or can never golf again.

Can I do the other stuff?

Can never touch a boob again. Can never to golf again.

Wait, did you just admit that sex is better?

Three, two, one. Go decide. Yeah, he did.

I said that.

Three, two, one.

Golf.

Oh, you never golf again. You'd never touch boob again.

If I could do the other stuff I never touch boo.

Yeah. Wow. Not even never touch a boob again.

I mean, golf, there's a lot of. Yeah, I know.

You take any golf?

I wasn't, like, things that you could feel for the rest of your life.

Best feelings in the world.

I take. I take. I take boobs.

Yeah, boobs.

Tattoo, definitely.

Boobs are so good. Yeah, they're pretty much the one. One pick in almost every draft.

Honorable mentions. My kid. One wasn't kids being born. It's actually. Maybe it should have been, but it's watching your kid accomplish something is like, the best feeling ever. Like just your kid being happy or feeling like they did something and, like, being proud of it. Is that one just bottle up and just be a billionaire?

Yeah.

Overnight. What other ones you guys have?

Falling in love.

Fall in love.

You're not a boobs or sex guy.

You're a love guy. Personality.

Yeah.

Nailing a parallel parking spot.

I had that in front of a crowd.

Yeah. Yep.

When there's people watching you, finding out that it's gonna be a snow day.

Yeah.

As a kid, having a great shit.

Just one of those, like, shits. Good. Like, where you just feel ten pound. Yeah. Pissed too. But when you feel, like, ten pounds lighter just peeing.

When you really have.

You really have to be that. Honestly, that's.

I know.

I had a bunch of sleep ones when I realized I didn't want to just do all.

I had to sleep.

Like, going to sleep with nothing to do with.

No alarm.

Yeah, no alarm.

Waking up fully rested. That was an incredible feeling I haven't felt in forever. What about this one? You guys going over a big jump when you feel it in the bottom of your balls. You know what I'm talking about? Or being on a swing set or roller coaster. Getting the bottom of your balls. Oh, that one's a good feeling.

Hypothetically, successfully sneaking into sporting event.

Yeah.

Is one of the best feelings ever.

Breaking the law. Fuck. Should have. Breaking the law on the list.

Breaking along, getting away with it. Yeah. Is a great one.

Getting away with a crime.

Sunday night of a long weekend. That's a great feeling where you just, like, your body tells you, like, oh, shit, we got to go to. Oh, shit. We don't.

Yeah, yeah.

They. Night of a long weekend.

Sunday night. Sunday night when it's. You have Monday off.

Yeah, it's a great.

The last day of. Of school as a kid.

Last day school.

Waking up Sunday after winning bet. Saturday.

Yep. Yeah. Yeah. Hitting a big. Hitting a game of the year. Taking off Spanx.

Yeah, let it breathe for a little bit.

I took off my Spanx last night after the wedding, and I just.

Oh, microwave thing. When you.

When you.

When you time it, you time when.

You time it and you get it right before the thing goes off.

Hitting all the traffic lights.

Oh, yeah, that's a good one.

Good feeling.

Being at a game that, you know, is like, historic. Is a good. Is like. Like either a clinching walking into a big game. Yeah. Well, that's a great one. Oh, there's.

When you see the grass that green through the stage concourse.

That's a great one.

Except when it's like, super sunny and you're really hungover.

I had one that we've all experienced. A Schwerber home run.

Yep.

Yeah. That's great feeling.

Great thing to.

Great fucking feeling I had.

When your car starts.

Yeah.

Maybe niche, but it's a good feeling.

Yeah. When the food comes to your table. Yeah. Restaurant. Yeah. Oh. Or also when you do the move where you go where the food's taking a while and you go to the bathroom and then you come back and it's there. That's a great feeling. When the one that perfectly.

When the server tells you excellent order.

Yeah. Yeah. That's a good feeling. What else? Any. Any others purring? A drive? How do you feel? How you feel?

I think Hanks was good.

I think. I think he did a good job.

Wasn't bad.

Yeah.

The red zone countdown clock the first season.

Yeah. The single, single onion ring in a french fry order going. Lucky one. Yeah, it's great feeling.

Going to a post Super bowl winning party with the team.

Yep.

I imagine that'd be fun.

Ringing a bell at a lighthouse leading.

Your favorite sports team onto the field.

Yeah.

The Patriots also just stole the bell for the Sixers. Like, why? Like, why is it a bell?

It's a fair question.

He's been like, what is it? Yeah.

Bells are in fucking lighthouses. Lighthouses are representation of the region of New England.

Wait, but, hey, you just said that the Patriots were your favorite team. I thought the Celtics were your favorite team.

The next one. Say the next one.

The favorite football team.

The next football team.

Making great time on a drive where you're just like, I fucking crush that drive.

I thought of one of, like, I didn't really know how to explain it. When you get somewhere and a line builds after you, there's no line. You. I didn't really know to explain it, but it's a great.

That's a great feeling. That's a great, great feeling. Okay. This is a good.

Mount Rushmore donating to charity.

Yeah. Matching.

Matching donation.

Yeah. But actually better. Great feeling matches actually feels better.

Doubling, doubling and matching feels way better.

Telling everyone you've donated charity feels great.

Giving your seat to a troop on a flight in front of Peter King and having him write about it in his football column.

Yeah, that's great.

It's got to be a good feeling.

It's a great feeling.

Imagine taking steroids would be a great feeling too.

Yeah. Any, anything with that, Hank?

Not yet. That'll be September.

Okay. Yeah. Cuz Hank turned to me yesterday, said it might be steroids.

Done steroid season. And fake the dunk.

We're gonna do some. I'm gonna make a call to a former colleague of ours.

All right, good. Good.

Sport.

Good show, boys.

We'll same career path.

Yeah, we'll see everyone from camp. See everyone from camp. On Wednesday, let's finish off with numbers.

69 and three in his honor.

23, 56.

99. Pug. Pft. 98.

Pug. Oh, yeah. Pug got me 99.

I want this to be 98.

He got it for the fifth time.

It's gonna be 98. It's Pug. It's not the number.

98. Oh, my God.

No fucking way.

No fucking way.

98 or 86.

That's 98 at the bottom. It's on the bottom.

Oh, my God.

What the fuck? God. Pug, you. It is just me, Pug. Oh, my God. You're a fucking magician, dude.

Pug is a problem.

How did you do that? It's 98. Pft. Do you want 98?

Yeah, you can take 99 back.

Oh, you just need to have Pug tell you what number to pick.

I can't.

Insane, this is.

Doesn't matter, cuz you in a row.

On different numbers is insane.

I got to get out of 99.

You are.

It's yours again, Pug.

This guy just dominates this machine.

I'm hot.

What a legend. Fucking pug. He's the perfect guy to have this too.

Yeah. God damn it, Pug. That's just. That's the most impressive thing ever seen.

Walks in after six. He's got six. You gotta go to the Jordan six. He's got a. He just spread your fingers out. Pug, what are you doing? There you go. All right. He just walks in at the end of the show and he just gets the number. Just walks out, does Pug. Things go. Scratches ears, plays, licks his butt.

Yeah.

All right. Good job, pug.

Love you guys.

I'll be coming for your love.

Okay.

Shine away oh, I'll be coming for your love take on me, take me.

Out,

make me go.