What is up, guys?

It's Andy for Cella, and this is the show for the Realist. Say goodbye to the lies, the fintech, and delusions of modern society. And welcome to motherfucking reality. Guys, today we have Andy and DJ Cruise, the motherfucking Internet. That's what we're going to do. That's what CTI stands for. It stands for Cruise the Internet. This is where we put current events up on the screen. We talk about what's going on. We speculate on what's true and what's not true. And then we talk about how we, the people, have to solve these problems going on in the The World. Other times throughout the week, we have shows within the show. We're going to have Q&AF. That's where you submit questions and we give you the answers. Now, you can submit your questions a couple of different ways. First way is-Guys, you can email these questions into askandy@andyforcela. Com. Or you go on YouTube in the comments section. Drop your question in the comments. We'll pick some from there as well. Sometimes we're going to have real talk. Real talk is just 5-20 minutes of me giving you some real talk. Then we have 75 Hard Verses.

If you're unfamiliar with the 75 Hard program, it is the world's most famous in history mental Transformation program, and you can get the program for free on the audio feed at episode 208. 75 Hard is the initial phase of the Live Hard program, which is covered in detail on that podcast. There's also a book called The Book on Mental Toughness, which is available on my website, andyfercela. Com. The book includes the entire Live Hard program, plus 10 chapters on mental toughness, plus a whole bunch of case studies on very famous people who have used mental toughness to become the very famous people that you recognize. Now, something about this show that you will notice that is unlike any other show is that we don't run ads. I pay for this show myself. I don't want to answer anybody. I don't want anybody to tell me what I can and can't say. I'm not going to listen to a bunch of nerds tell me what I'm going to do. In exchange for that, very simply, I ask that you help us grow the show. We talk about things that the internet doesn't like. We're constantly dealing with traffic bans, shadow bans, traffic throttling, having our shit removed.

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All right.

Hey. What's up, dude? Oh, Oh, man.Oh, man, what?We.

Got a little special, special.

We do. We got a little special sauce today. A little special sauce. My man, Duke Gomez is in the house. What's up, bro?I'm.

Alive still.Yeah? It's actually nice to see someone that has the same struggles as me with all that shit you were saying, with your shadow ban and shit? Yeah.

Oh, God. You can hammer, too?

What? I'm on my fifth Instagram account. Really? Yeah, bro. Let's backtrack to TikTok. I'm on my seventh TikTok account. That's crazy. Yeah, bro. I had to make like 45 Different emails.

So you're on the fucking list. You're with us.

Yeah, bro. I was bad. You think my shit's crazy. I was too insane. See, I like that.

I love it. I like some of your shirts, man.

Bullying the only action that builds character. That's it. That's fact.

Yeah. Yeah, but wearing that shit at a Walmart, dude, or a fucking Shopright is the scariest shit ever, dude. I'll be buying groceries, and I got a 90-year-old grandma behind me like, What the fuck? That's very scary.

Bro, bullying works. We need more bullying. I'm just being real. We need more bullying. If we bullied people more often, we wouldn't have all this crazy shit. I'm just saying I'd become pro-bullying.

I'm definitely now.

I know you are.

Also, too.

You're also pro-racism.

I mean, you are. I do like your pronouns, though.

Those are great pronouns. I swips them up sometimes.

I think it's important that we respect those.

What are your pronouns? Nick.

I go by nick Her.

I would have thought dickhead.

I don't care.

I don't care. I don't care. I don't care. I don't care. I don't care. That's fair, too. I might make a special shirt just for you, dick/head, and I'll email right to your front doorstep. I'll rock it. I'll talk you rock it. You got to wear it on the next show. Done.

Send it. Send it, man. But yeah, good to be here.

Hey, where can people get these shirts?

Dukeomes. Com for the most ruthless, most amazing quality merch that you could possibly get. If you want to piss someone off, dukeomes. Com. I can't tell you how many people actually get in trouble with wearing that shit to school, out places. I get emails from moms all the time. My son just got suspended for wearing a bullying shirt. Well, listen, it's not my fault that your son is a giant nutsack, okay?

You just join the team of Nutsacks, bro. Team Nutsack.

Team Nutsack all the way.

That's us. I love it.

I'm with it, man. Sweet.

Hey, before we get into it, where could people find you at?

Dukeomes7 is one Instagram account. I got Dukeomesbackup2.0. I'll sit here for five hours listening off names.

So Dukeomes7 on Instagram?

Yeah, that's the main one. That's the bread and butter.

Cool. Sweet. You get DJ Salivating over there talking about bread and butter.

I got you excited, huh?

You sound like you got a little Italian in you, man.

Oh, dude, yeah. What? Yeah. Almost white as could be.

He's from Jersey, bro. I asked him what he got.

That's where I get it from. I go, Where's home?

He goes, Jersey. I go, That makes sense. Got it. So what's going on today, DJ?

A lot of interesting stuff happening in the day. Let's start off with the dumb ass of the day. I think that's a good place to start.

It's always a nice Three dumbasses. We'll add one more.

Why not four? Dumbass of the day goes to this MSNBC host who gets pissed off because he gets caught in the lie. Let's dive into this a little bit. Headline reads, MSNBC host, threaten to sue Trump aid, Cory Lewandowski, for defamation. Then is exposed by his own words in shocking video. The host is Ari Melber. When he brought Cory Lewandowski on during a live broadcast of his own show- That was a mistake. That's a mistake because Cory is pretty fucking- Cory is fucking with it.

He's with it.

But the exchange occurred after Lewandowski had the audacity to quote Melbers' own words back to him. Words that exposed the media's obsession with sensationalizing any aspect of President Donald Trump's life, even following a failed assassination attempt. Lewandowski, again, he's a Senior Campaign Manager. He played a big role more in 2016.

He's running the campaign right now.

Trump just brought him back in for this one. I don't think he did much in 2020, but he's back in. But he called out the MSNBC host for his hypocrisy, pointing out how Melbour had ascribed Trump's appearance at the RNC last month. Let's watch this little exchange here.

Fox News, which has been caught in defamation, ran a false piece falsely stating that I said something else that I didn't say. I stand on that. I stand on the New York Times quote.

So you didn't say this bandage was a proper spectacle from a candidate who was obsessed with spectacles.

I did not say that. That's fair. A placard for delegates to fill in, an image for political mobilization, a spectacle for this candidate who we know is, by his own admission, obsessed with assorted spectacles. Mr. Lundowski, I did not say that. That is a false quote. I have it right here. It's clear. What you have is a false quote. You absolutely said it. What you have is a false quote. I'm putting you on notice. If you continue to repeat falsely that I said that, you will be potentially in a defamation situation because I didn't say that. But I understand that you're working off the internet. There's a lot of false This is what it says right here.I wish you luck with that. And Cory Lewandowski, we gave you time. I appreciate you coming on.So you would apologize to the President for that. Thank you for joining me. Corey Lewandowski, Trump 2024. And we will be right back. What an asshole. Dude, listen, I don't even... I stay the fuck away from all this shit because if I don't know fully about it, I don't put it on the Internet. And my dad always tells me that because he's like, But I mean, dude.

They were talking about that Trump bandage when he got shot.

Yeah, Yeah. They were saying it was fake.

They were saying it was fake. He gets caught out for his own shit. Yeah.

Did you see Lewandowski's fucking face light up when he said he didn't say it? If you watch the clip again, his eyes, he's getting excited. He's like, All right, this guy's walking right in my crap.

They just put it right there.

It's funny while people- Sure it's the same guy?

Yeah. No shit.

Yeah, no shit, dude.

I did not say that. That is a false quote.

I have it right here.

It's a clip. What you have is a false quote.

I'm reversing. I have it as a false quote. I'm putting you on notice.

If you continue to repeat falsely?

No, before that. All the way in the beginning. All right, right here. Look at his face. Wait, hold on. Right before that, watch his face light up when he starts realizing this guy's going to lie.

That's fair. A placard for delegates to fill in an image.

Bro, reverse the fucking video. Holy shit, man. You're making the segment all fucked up.

He's falsely stating that I said something else that I I didn't say. So I stand on that.

Oh, you didn't say that. You didn't say this bandage was a proper spectacle for a candidate who was obsessed with spectables. That's fair. He's full of shit.

Cory's pretty fucking witty, bro.

You can't try to get it. What's crazy is, is like, what the fuck? How do you not remember you saying that? It was like a week ago.

You know what I'm saying? That it's a complete lie.

All these people, they say all this shit, and they forget that it's on camera all the time.

Oh, yeah. And then once it's on camera, It's never going to leave off the internet.

It's like all the shit. You see those pandemic clips where they're all saying all that crazy shit? I didn't say that. Yeah, exactly.

We didn't even say that. We didn't even show body bags. What? Yeah, it's crazy. Dumb ass of the day. Good job.

Sue us. Douchebag.

Yeah, no shit, man. Well, let's get into our headlines, guys. Remember, if you want to see any of these pictures, articles, links, videos, go to andyfricella. Com. You guys can find them linked there. We got Three headlines. Let's dive into them. Let's start with headline number one. Got to talk about it. Going to Colorado. This shit is insane. This is wild. Arms crew storms Colorado apartment building overrun by Venezuelan gang spilling out from Sanctuary City. With a wild... Have you seen this? Probably not. Oh, dude.

Dude, I try to stay as far off the internet as it can because this shit will brain fuck you. Dude.

Yeah, we're totally brain fucked here. Oh, dude.

That shit's so bad.

All of us, everybody listening. It is what it is.

Holy fuck.

This shit's wild, man. So a shocking video shows a crew of gun-wielding men stormed through a Colorado apartment building, reportedly overrun by a dangerous Venezuelan prison gang. The group of heavily armed men, including three with handguns and one with a rifle, enter the trouble Department complex in the diverse suburb of Aurora and break into a unit. The clip obtained by KDBR shows. The footage was captured earlier this month, shortly before a shootout at the complex, The Edge at Lorry. Severely injured one person and damaged multiple cars, according to the local news station. A separate clip at a different time shows two men bashing the lock of a unit with a tire iron inside the same housing complex where migrants have moved in. The recent crime at the building has left residents of The Edge on Edge. Here's a clip of the break-in.

Oh, my God. I mean, look, man.

They're probably just hungry. Yeah. They're probably just hungry. They look like they were getting ready to go to church. They're future dentists and lawyers and doctors. Best of the best. These fine young men. I don't know why you're picking on them, DJ. I think you're a fucking racist. Possibly. Yeah.

But let's see what the residents had to say.

They're racist, too.

They are. The article continues saying, It's been a nightmare, and I can't wait to get out of here. They're moving out in droves. One of the residents say they have to put five locks on their apartment door from the top to bottom, along with a security bar jammer. Now, police for Denver, Denver Police Department, they released a statement saying that The Denver Police Department takes the presence of Tren DeAragua, which is the name of the prison gang.

They must be jacked.

Yeah. Well, they didn't look that jacked.

I'm just saying Tren.

You could have blew right through those. It was like Next tissue paper.

You're going to have to work out.

It's crazy seeing some of these dudes with those massive guns that are literally built like fucking Flat Stanley, and they just get blown away. That shit is just insane.

I like those videos. I watch all those gang videos from Brazil and shit.

Bro, that shit is crazy.

Have you seen that one where them dudes are walking out of the fucking convenience store and the dudes drive by them with a fully automatic? Oh, I did see that. Yeah, and then they run back.

And they still shoot at him. Yeah. That shit is like they're shooting at him while he's Bro, that looked like a movie. It's a different breed of people, bro. That shit is crazy. I did watch. I saw that on Twitter.

Yeah, that's a whole different breed, man.

I love that shit. I feel bad that people are getting shot, but I definitely can't help but watch it.

You might need to get checked out, dude.

I know. Bro, it's what you said, dude. Mine fucks your brain.

Bro, I watched that shit and I'm like, All right, I'm going to go to the beach for the day. I'm all for it. That shit fucks me off. I guess that's what it's called now. I mean, you could post whatever the fuck you want on there. A video like that would never be able to post on Instagram. They take it down immediately.

It is pretty crazy.

It's a sketchy scroll on X. Yeah, it is. God damn. You either see a pair of tits or you're seeing someone getting rocked.

Yeah, but that's how the internet should be, man. It should be just wide open.

That's what I think. With exceptions. I feel like it should be some exception. None of that trans shit.

No, I agree. None of that kid shit. But everything else, yeah.

Yo, that shit. That is crazy. The trans shit.

Fucking insane. But DPD has responded saying that the safety of their residents and officers is always a top priority. They've been getting destroyed because not even a week before the break-in, this is what the streets of Aurora, Colorado, looked like. Check this clip out. Nigger, the Venezuelans is taking over.

They just jacked them?

They're just robbing people in the middle of the fucking news. These niggers is out here tripping. Bro, damn, they done made a mess and shit.

Oh, my God. Well, think out it's a target.

I'm surprised we don't see a bunch of pumpkin spice ladies out there picking that shit up.

Oh, my. Oh, shit. What the-Yeah, they're tripping.

What is that? Nigger, they cracking off in the air and everything. They They driving over this.

Nigger, we almost just got hit.

Holy shit. Are you shooting?

Bro, it's shit out.

It's fucking wild.

This nigger is his own bullshit.

Bro, they ain't going to be laughing too much longer.

No. What do you gain out of doing that? Is it appreciate? I guess.

The thing is, guys, it's not just fucking Colorado that's dealing with this. They call it a surge. But New York, Chicago, California, they're all experiencing a massive surge of this specific prison gang, where in California, this just happened. 20 migrants just tried to stop a fucking elementary school bus on the highway and board it because these gangs are involved in trafficking and drug trafficking, and child trafficking, sex trafficking. And so it's wild. But the thing is, what's the response from government? We heard DPD What is California doing about it? They're giving them $150,000 home loans to buy houses.

Why do they need loans? They just take them.

That's when my goddamn tax money went.

Dude, that's right. I was just telling- You're racist if you don't fucking think that it's... If you don't agree that they should come here. You know that, right?

I mean, Uncle Sam walked into my house and pulled my pants down and fucked me with no lube. Yeah, all of us. I was just Because I was so new to everything at the time that I was getting tired, I didn't realize it would get to that point. Oh my lanta, I got railed. I'm just like, All right. I'm driving my car, there's still fucking potholes everywhere. Fix the fucking roads then.

They don't give a fuck, bro.

Let's put that right into Section 8 housing.

Yeah, let's just let Venezuela- That guy looks like a dick. He's a fucking douchebag. Oh, my God.

This is like number one cheese dick right here.

He is a number one cheese dick. Douchebag.

Keat.

Gavin Newsom. Look at that fucking guy. He looks like he was cloned to play a caricature of a politician.

That's what he looks at. That dude's got a face only a mother could love, dude. I can't imagine. Imagine waking up next to that. Fuck that, dude.

Dude, I can't believe that's a real human, if I'm being honest.

He looks like that fucking... What's that movie with the frozen guy?

No, bro, you're talking about fucking America's Psycho. Am I? Or maybe not.

I'm thinking of the one Jim Carrey with the mask.

The mask? He looks like American Psycho to me.

He looks like Mike Tyson's punching bag.

He looks like he sucks dicks.

Yeah, and that's a fact.

Not that there's anything wrong with that. He'd be a chomp. That's an observation.

Guys, cheesegrating that meat. Fuck, man.

But, yeah, this guy's a douchebag, man.

Who even is that?

That's Gavin Newsom, bro. That's the governor of California.

Fuck that guy.

Bro, he's going to run for President.

Yo, did you see what they passed in California recently? I just saw it.

Which one?

There was one thing I saw. Someone sent it to me. That's how I saw it. It was like they passed a law where if the kid identifies as whatever it was, a furry or wants to be a girl and he's a guy, the teacher has to get permission from the kid in order to tell his parents.

Bro, not only that, in some places, you can lose custody of your kids by not allowing for them to transition.

Bro, and these kids are transitioning at five, six years old.

Yeah, because their parents are mentally fucking-It's glooming. Yes. Bro, listen, man, some of these parents, real talk, it's crazy that we have tests to drive. We don't have a test to be a parent. You should be... Look, this is going to be in my policy.

My brother says that all the time. It's crazy.

We're going to figure out a way to temporarily sterilize everybody until they pass a test. I don't fix the population.

We're halfway there with the vaccines and shit.

Yeah. Anyway, yeah.

It's fucking insane. Fucking douchebag. But yeah, so they're giving them $150,000 for loans. Migrants, specifically, these illegal ones.

That's insane. In California or Denver? In California.

In California, where those same migrants are fucking trying to- You got a hundred thousand fucking veterans on the fucking...

Remember we were out there? Bro, there's tents. Have you been to California lately?

Like in LA? I've never seen so much human shit in my life.

Bro, it's insane. Unbelievable. We were there three years ago, and it was bad. I know it's worse now.

I went there a couple of months ago. Terrible.

Fuck. Terrible. You got all these guys who fucking serve our country, living in tents and shit outside the facilities. But let's give these motherfuckers that come from other places 150 grand to buy a house. Bro, these people proposing this shit should be in fucking jail.

Well, that's the thing. Why would they do it? What's the point of giving... I mean, not only that, bro, they're also... That's a lot of money. They're also, California just passed this law, too, banning voter ID in elections to allow them to also vote. And it's like, why would they do that? It's because we're funding these cities with billions of fucking dollars to do this. I mean, it's all written out there, man. And so it's Fucked up shit. We'll see how it goes, though, man.

Well, how do I get my 150?

I think we both should go there. Let's all three go there and be these like-Let's show up with Lizzo.

They'll be scared.

Bro, did you see she's losing weight now?

Baleem works. I just made a video on it. Really? Yep. Did she? Baleemio works.

Yo, I'm serious.

She see my shit, and I'm praying she did. What are you saying? I'm telling you, bro. It cut to me, and I was like, We got Lizzo working out before GTA 6. That's awesome, dude.

That's fucking incredible.

Dude, she was my Nart's nemesis for years, dude. When Lizzo takes a bath, her feet don't get wet. Did you guys know about that? Yeah, bro. Fuck. That, you all, I despise that shit. You're fucking normalizing obesity.

Bro, I'm with you, dude. It's disgusting shit. It's super harmful. It's harmful for culture. Nobody buys it. Nobody looks at these 500-pound women and says, Oh, fuck, yeah, bro. Dude, it's the real shit that you see the memes about. All the women say, Oh, she's so beautiful. And listen, dude, she might be the nicest woman. I don't know her personally. I'm not trying to be a bully, but bullying does work. But let's be real, dude. All these women are full of shit, just like they're full of shit with the feminist bullshit. They fucking say, Oh, look how beautiful Lizzo is. And if you fucking turn around and look at them and you say, Man, you remind me of Lizzo, they get pissed off. Exactly.

Yeah. And that's another thing. We need to boycott fat models, dude. Dude. Because I was on Victoria's Secret website last Valentine's Day, getting this girl that I was talking to, some panties and shit. And I'm like, Yo, I want to see it on a hot chic. I don't want to see it on a fucking 400-pound bitch. What is that? And that shit. And then I'm like, All right. And then I feel bad for my chic now because she ain't going to get any of that. Because I don't know what it's going to look like.

Well, bro, it's-Oh, my.

She can't even fit on the screen, dude. Yeah, but she fucking-She's looking good, though.

She's probably down 100. She does look a lot better. But I'm just not down with this fucking lying about fucking attractiveness, okay? It's a fucking lie. Okay, I know there's some dudes that are into that shit. I know a couple of dudes like that. Who's it? No, I know. Skinny white dudes are into that shit, bro.

No, I got one dude. Yeah, he loves that shit.

I know a dude who's super skinny, white guy. He fucking loves that shit, bro.

I applaud I applaud them.

I applaud those guys.

How did you even do that? I would love to know the mathematic equation to fuck a fat bitch.

You got to be like a horse.

You got to be packing some serious.

Because, dude, the depth, it's in there. You know what I'm saying? It's like drill, drill, drill. Drill, baby, drill. Fucking a pile of silipone. Look, bro, I applaud Lizzo for doing this, but people are mad at her about it. They're like, Oh, I thought you were about this. Bro, she finally figured out it's not healthy, man. She's going to die. Yes. And like, dude, pushing this fucking standard of obesity, like you said, Duke, that is very harmful to society. And it is about demoralization. And like we talk about, It's about making you dependent on the system. They want you fucking fat, so you consume their food, so you have to consume their medication. You sit at home and mega-consume their data. This is all about money, and they're handicapping people. And then they're convincing people who are overweight that It's okay. Look, bro, if you're overweight and you're working to get better, I will fucking walk the whole path with you. There is not another motherfucker in the world that will do the shit with you more than me. I will do it with you. But, bro, I'm not going to sit here and lie about it.

It's not attractive at all, except to the little skinny white dude who needs his taxes paid.

Another thing that pisses me off, too, even more is I fucking hate when I pull up to a restaurant restaurant or something and a fat person parks in a fucking handicap spot. Yeah, it's not a handicap. My brother's an amputee. He's got one leg. Yeah. So sometimes he never uses that excuse. He hates parking in the handicap spot, but he is a handicap.

Isn't that funny, though? People who are really handicapped don't do it?

Yeah, they don't do it. And, bro, it's like, you should be parking as far away from the fucking restaurant as possible. You need the miles, bitch.

Get that stuff found out. Get that step down.

Park as far away from the goddamn building as you pop. Find the last parking spot that that place offers.

Man, it's It's just the truth.

I feel the same way about the fucking scooters in Walmart.

Yes. Never mind the scooters in Walmart. I was just at Disney World last year. Bro, I didn't see one person using the scooter with an actual handicap.

Yeah, it was all just big people.

And the scooters were gone in 20 minutes. Jay breaks. That's crazy.

Bro, I agree. It's not a handicap. It's a self-induced condition. It's called lack of discipline and food addiction. And food addiction is a real thing. But you can overcome that just like you overcome alcohol or drugs or anything.

They think the world revolves around them because they're fat as fuck.

Yeah, and it's just not. Well, it wasn't always that way. It's just that way now because it's been culturally pushed for the last decade. Like, bro.Thanks, pal.Yeah, no shit.Shark off. I am happy she's losing weight.

I used to DM her all the time. I was on one of the boxer so bad. But I don't even think I could get to her if I boxed her. That'd be like punching, fucking punching bag.

I think that'd be dangerous, bro. I mean, she's big.

Bro, she's like Gorlock.

You can't let her put your foot. No, I think Gorlock's bigger.

Gorlok is the destroyer.

Gorlok is the destroyer, too.

She's pretty tall.

That's a dude.

Yeah.

Yeah, dude. I tried. Yo, I was talking to her for a bit.

Did you see those videos where they send the Hot Girl up to the dude? They're like, Hey, you want to meet my sister? And she walks up. That's hilarious.

I watch those all the time.

That's so fucked up.

It is.

Yeah.

Well, go on a diet. You know what I'm saying? Be healthy. She's looking at me. I'll say this, She's down 100 pounds, at least.

Oh, definitely. That video, the video I reacted to, she was looking at me. It cut them in. I was like, Lizzo, you might have a chance with me, pal. In like 10 years.

I think this is thumbs up. I know it's not thumbs up, but I give her credit, dude.

That'll back up my statement of saying bullying builds character. That's right. Bro, her comment section used to be like, insane, dude.

That's right. Now she's like, All right, I got to do something about it.

Now she's on my side. That's right. She wasn't.

Bro, motherfucker, when I was fat, I made fun of all the fucking time on the internet. And like, bro, I get pissed, but I knew they were right. I'll tell you, somebody left a... I still have it. It says, What's the seat? This is when I had first form and S2. This is like 2015 when I was 350. And it said, what's the CEO too fucking rich to use his own products? And that changed my whole life. I was like, fuck. And I fucking lost 100 pounds the next year. And then I haven't gained any of it back. You know what I'm saying? Like, bro, sometimes that shit is...

I mean, it is. I always say you need that one friend in your friend group that is just honest with you. You can't be surrounded with a bunch of yes men. You can't. I want that one person that if I'm going out the night and you don't like my outfit, tell me I look like dog shit, dude. If there's something on my face, smear it off, pal. Don't make me look like a jerk off when I'm not in public around you.

That's the difference between guys and girls, though, because girls will intentionally tell a girl she looks good knowing she looks like shit.

Look at a bitch's comment section on IG. That is the fakest thing in America. Oh, my God, you look beautiful now, bitch. You're 5:40 and you need a treadmill now. I hate looking at girls.

She ain't taking no This guy's get him a mat, dude.

Fuck, man.

Dude, listen.

It's black. Holy shit.

It's black. No, the caffeine is kicking in, man.

You need another energy, J.

Paul.

No, that's the problem.

Oh, fuck. I'm not going to have the whole fridge. Take I'm not going to take the whole case home with you.

I was going to ask you, you don't take no grenades? You're not going to follow no grenade?

That's the bigger one? The big set? No, dude, I stay away from there. And it's so funny, bro. I'll have bigger people like, when I'm out at a bar or something, I'll be like, That's the guy, that fat shame. She'll be like, Yes, it is. And I do it every time I go, I go, Yes. Is there a problem? I don't understand.

It's the greatest way to defeat any hate. Dude, people always talk shit to me.

I'm like, Yeah, you're right. It's very true. I do fat shame. I don't apologize, but I do say that. I had a girl throw a drink in my face, dude. Really? Yeah, and I just let her rock. I was like, Thanks for the shower, sweetheart.

Thanks for the shower. It ain't a party unless you get a drink in your face, bro.

It's true, man. Guys, jump in on this conversation. Let us know what you guys think down in the comments. With that being said, let's go cruise some of these. All right.

Yo, these are awesome, dude. You like them? Yeah, bro. It was sick.

So this first comment This document comes from Caufen on Cush Sheem.

Caufen on Kush.

This dude cannot wait to storm the capital again.

I mean, I do regret I missed it the first time.We.

Watched it.Wait, I didn't get it.

The J6 shit? They're talking about him.

Yeah, they're saying I'm a domestic terrorist. Here's the deal. Caufen on Cush, Cush Reem. See, if I was to storm the Capitol, I'd bring my fucking guns because it'd be a real insurrection. I'm not like one of these pussies that calls it an insurrection because you want to for political reasons. A real insurrection would be if I was there, there would be heads on fucking stakes, and there would be a lot of guns, and probably my tank.

A lot of guns. You like guns?

I shot one for the first time ever, last month, and I had no idea what the fuck I was doing, dude. I put my eye too close to the scope. Yeah, I'm a bitch. I sound like one right now saying that. Dude, I almost ended up like Helen Keller blew the eye socket out, Oh, man. I was like, I'm good off the guns.

We got to get you in Missouri more.

We got you. You got to shoot a lot around here?

Oh, yeah.

We shoot off back towards here. Dude, I want to shoot a sniper so bad. I would just have to bring an extra pair of diapers because I'll definitely shit myself.

It ain't no big deal. Really? Yeah, it's awesome. You come out for one day, bro, you'll be hooked.

I'm telling you, I'm going to come out with a bike and everything. I need the whole rundown.

We got to have a farm day with Duke and Motorcycles and Dots. Let's do it. Let's do it.

I like that shit.

This next comment The one that comes from Tyler James Buswell. L-o-l, this guy figured out how to use a computer yesterday.

He's talking about you.

I think that was the-Yeah, he's talking about you. Yeah, I did.

You figured out how to speak today.

The truth is, I still don't know how to use one.

I appreciate it, Tyler. Thanks.

Look at that little kid talking shit to you.

Yeah, how are you going to let that happen?

That kid's fucking 10 years old.

Oh my God. There's little kids who do talk a lot of shit.

Yeah, it's because they play that Call of Duty, bro. They play Call of Duty. We need to bring back the Black Ops lobby.

That was lit. Oh, yeah.

Well, now they got all the AI shit involved in the chat now. They monitor what you say. It's not even just typing shit.

Ai is the It's crazy as shit ever. These AI dudes are making fake naked chicks and putting them on OnlyFans and making a shit ton of money.

How they doing that?

Bro, never mind them doing that, what asshole is buying that. You should get your credit. Your credit score should go down if you're buying it.

Bro, it's these motherfuckers that fucking look at Lizzo and they're like, Oh, she's so beautiful. And they sit at home, they collect their check, they play fucking video games, and they fucking jerk off all day. They've never touched a real woman ever. They've never seen real boobies ever, bro. And they fucking have 50 subscriptions to OnlyFans. They send them fucking flowers. It's like, dude, it's the simpiest, weakest fucking shit in the world. It's the whole problem with the world, bro. The internet needs to go away. Look, men do great things for pussy. That's the fucking facts. And if you make it hard to get it, they will conquer the Earth to get it. But now it's all over the place for free and for these girls showing their fucking ass for three bucks. Now, men are just like, Fuck it. I get it for free. My fan doesn't even feel like it's me. Bro, when When I was young, when I was fucking 15, 16, 17, I knew. I'm like, Fuck. I like girls a lot.

Thank God.

Yeah. Then I'm like, And I'm not that attractive, so I got to get rich. So like, Dude, I knew it. I knew the game, bro. So I knew I had to go to work. But it ain't like that anymore, man.

I always like to laugh, too. I always tell people. Yeah, that's right.

You got to be rich or funny. Yeah.

Have You can make a check laugh and giggle, you can make that ass clap and jiggle. I say it. It is funny. And the bang.

That's the fucking truth, too, though.

It's the best when a girl wants nothing to do with you, happens all the time. I go to my guy, Let me get like 30 minutes of your time, you hot piece of shit. And they love that because they don't know how to take that. You call them a hot piece of shit, they're like, You're throwing me off, pal. I'm like, Yeah, I got you right where I need you, sweetie. And they're all stupid as hell, dude. The ones over by me You are just really dumb. It's just like doornaubs, dude.

I got no comment. If it works, it works.

If it ain't broken, don't fix it.

My move used to be real. I can't even say my move.Oh, shit.I retired.

Damn, buddy hung up the boots.

I had a fucking move that was undeniable. Worked every time. Every single fucking time. But I can't say it because if I say it publicly, all the people be using it and it won't be working. It won't work anymore.

You can't lay your secrets out. That's where I fucked up. Shit happens. Now everyone's going to use that giggle on. That was mine. Yeah, it's a good one.

That's what it is. That needs to be a shirt, dude.

Oh, yeah. We're in the works for it. There you go. I got a make men, men again shirt coming, too. I like that. Yeah.

That's a good one. Andy, you pissed off a couple of Kevins. I did. You remember the KevDog comment? Kevdog? Yeah, we talked about you pissed off some Kevins. I did. Kevdog does not represent all Kevins. This has been a public service announcement.

Okay. I never said it did.

No. Kevin is a weird name, though.

I bet you $40 that guy has boat shoes on right now.

Sperries?

Sperries. Kevin is a fucking boat shoe name.

Wears Sperries and doesn't have a boat.

Dick.

Dick. I got this one bar by my house. It's filled with them. All Chad's. Yeah. I hate those dudes, bro.

Not giga Chad's either. Just regular Chad.

Just buttoned up collar like, buddy, go home, dude.

Fucking sweat around their waist. Yeah.

Cock in their hand. Thumb up the ass. Like, dude, fuck out of here.

Oh, man. This last comment, let's check this one out. From @teamaspire to inspire. If the fourth full moon of the year hadn't already passed, I'd be scared as fuck because all the Andy Christ doesn't miss.

I don't like that name. That's That's not a good name. Let's stop that. I don't miss, though. It's been trending. Hey. You're right. It's the fucking... I'm in the fucking... What is it? The Free Masons? The Naughty. Yeah. I got accused to be in the Free Mason for the thousandth time.

It's trending.

How does Andy say all this shit? Not go to jail? I don't know, man. I'm wondering it, too.

All right, my guys, we appreciate Thank you for being real-ass fans. Keep liking, keep commenting. Make sure you guys hit the bell notification on the tube. Stay up to date with the latest headlines and latest episodes dropping from Real AF. That makes that headline number two. Let's talk about... Get on Trump a little bit. Trump has been getting some heat here lately today. Headline reads, Trump respectfully honored fallen troops at Arlington National Cemetery amid altercation report. So apparently some shit happened right before he was laying the wreath for the 13 fallen servicemen and women. So let's dive into this a little bit. So AP released this article, this headline, saying, Arlington Cemetery official was pushed aside in Trump staff altercation but won't press charges. So apparently, there was an altercation that happened before the wreath ceremony, where a member of Trump's staff pushed a member of the Arlington Cemetery staff because of the cameras. Being allowed or not allowed. Some weird shit happened in there. So let's dive into this a little bit. An Arlington National Cemetery official was abruptly pushed aside during an altercation with former President Donald Trump's staff during a wreath laying ceremony but declined to press charges, an army spokesman said Thursday.

A statement said the Cemetery employee was trying to make sure those participating in the wreath laying ceremony earlier this week were following the rules. This employee acted with professionalism and avoided further disruption, the statement said. The incident was reported to the police, but the employee decided not to press charges. The army said it considered the matter closed. Trump's campaign was warned about not taking photographs before the altercation at Arlington National Cemetery during a wreath laying ceremony on Monday to honor service members killed in Afghanistan war withdrawal, a defense official told the AP on Wednesday. The defense official, speaking on condition of anonymity to discuss a sensitive matter, said that the Trump campaign was warned about not taking photographs in Section 60, which is where the members were buried at before their arrival and the altercation. Section 60 is the burial site for military personnel killed while fighting in Afghanistan and Iraq. So the media runs this fucking story, runs this narrative that there was a fight between a Trump official on a campaign staff and this Arlington National Cemetery member. But the media is lying, and the gold star families, the parents and relatives of those fallen, are coming out saying that, No, that's complete bullshit, saying that, one, Trump was actually invited there to do that by those family members.

The media team for Trump, there was already a meeting that they had on the Sunday before where the family said that, Hey, we want them to bring cameras to take pictures at the site. This is one of the pictures, for example, where you're not supposed to be taking pictures, but because one of the parents of the following were not able to be there, they wanted pictures so that way they could share the experience. And you know how mainstream media does what they do best, which is just lots of fucking everybody. But another news. So that happened, but that's not even the story. Here's the main story. We know that Com Queen and Timmy to the Walls, they haven't done a press interview in over a month. Well, now they're doing one, and they're getting blasted for it. Harris and Wall sits down for first major television interview of their presidential campaign. So vice President Kamal Harris and her running mate, Will They all sit down Thursday for their first major television interview of their presidential campaign as the duo travels in Southeast Georgia on a bus tour. They're doing the interview with Dana Basch from CNN.

And the problem is that it was supposed to just be Kamala, and now she's doing it with Tim Walls, which even Anderson Cooper from CNN said that that's going to decrease the amount she's going to be pressed because now she has her cover buddy with her.

She's not going to get pressed anyway. It's a fucking CNN.

It's Dana Basch.

Is Dana Basch the fucking mean dark-headed one?

No, she's the blonde, the weird-looking blonde. She did the debate with Trump and Biden.

That other one looks like the devil. Which one? That dark-haired one with the fucking unibrow.

The asshole?

Yeah, she's an asshole.

Yeah, I know what you're talking about. She's an asshole.

She could be cute, but she's just so fucking mean. I think that's a stretch. Well, you'd have to do some work up here. It's a lot of beer. Get rid of that burp.

It's a lot of beer. A lot of drinking involved.

Stash up top. I'll get you.

It is.

That's the catapult. That's a maker's mouth.

It's like a whole bottle.

But even Harris, Anderson Cooper, jumped in on this saying, Paul, I want to talk about the interview tomorrow that's going to be airing. Dana Basch is doing it here for CNN. It's Harris and Walsh. Harris is obviously being criticized by some for not doing the interview solo. Do you think she should have done her first major interview since accepting the nomination alone? I don't know how long this interview is going to be, but obviously, with two people, it does eat up the time that a reporter can ask her directly questions and follow up with her directly. You have that happen, and then the same day that happens, apparently now, Harris is in the lead over Trump in polls by readers.

Who the fuck believes that? Who believes that? You go up and down the street, dude, of anywhere, any of these videos anybody's doing that are street walking videos, and they ask anybody who they're voting for, and they are saying fucking Trump. You ask anybody. Dude, they're oversampling the Democrats to create a false poll. It's just insane, dude.

Bitch hasn't spoken to anybody in over a month.

Didn't they Photoshop a photo of a crowd in front of a plane? I think they got...

Well, there was some stuff about the plane being AI generated or something.

Something.

Yeah, there was something about that. I couldn't find the actual...

I know for sure. Well, that was inconclusive because some people were saying it was, I don't know. But I tell you what for sure they're doing, I know this for sure because I got people on the ground at these events, is they're taping off. At events, they'll put these big drapes down to block off all the empty seats. When they went to-They sardine everybody in one area.

Yes.

When they went to Milwaukee during the D&C, they tried to make it look like they sold out the Chicago venue, and then they had overflow at Milwaukee. In Milwaukee, they cordoned all off to one section and just did it for TV. I know that for a fact because I had friends that are... I'm not going to say what they do, but they were there. I got a video of him. That's crazy, bro.

No, it's insane.

That's fucking-I showed you the video, right?

Yeah, I've seen it.

I'm not going to put it up there because I don't want to burn my contacts.

People believe everything they fucking see on the internet.

That's what's funny. Bro, there's so much to It's really insane. The craziest part- It's not Russian disinformation. It's our own fucking government that does it.

I think the worst part about it, I just can't get over the fact that, bro, two months ago, people fucking hated.

They still hate her, bro. Listen, Listen, they still hate her. It's all fucking fake. Listen, dude, I'm telling you, it is all fake. People still hate her, and they actually hate her more. All right? What is going on here is they are propping her up in the media. They're using deceptive techniques in every way, shape, or form. They are fucking with the polls by oversampling Democrats and not sampling an actual fair, unbiased group of people to create the perception that it's close enough so that they could fucking cheat. That's what the fuck this is about. It's not about anything other than that. And dude, nobody likes her. She can't talk. She has no policy. Bro, they don't even have a policy. They said, Oh, our policy will be published after the election.

There was another visita where she was like, Everyone has to be more woke. I'm like, Go woke, go broke, dude. That's fucking crazy.

Yeah, people are over it, dude. I think the longer... I think the more they push with this obnoxiously deceptive and fake shit, the more the people who were Democrats who were like, This is fucked up, are being like, damn, dude, look how bad they really are. It's like, dude, it really is. It's like when you grow up and you have an uncle that you always thought was cool, and then you figure out a little bit, you're like, man, this guy's fucked up. And then you start to watch. Yeah, but then Then you start watching them, and then you're like, holy shit, dude, my uncle's a total degenerate. You start seeing the truth when you open yourself up to it. And so there's a lot of these people who are opened up to it now, who are the more they push, the more they're realizing that this is total bullshit. I would argue if they were polling the exact same way as they did four months ago, I bet you she has less of approval rating now than she did then. Than she did then.

Which was 27%.

Which was 27%.

I think another thing, too, a lot of the stuff that is starting to come back now is even just the shit with COVID. You know what I'm saying? How bad was COVID up there for you? Because you were in New Jersey. New Jersey was pretty high. Yeah, bro.

I used to get... The whole mass thing was the most unbelievable fucking thing in the world. The craziest part was going to a restaurant and having it on and then sitting down and take it off. That's like having a pissing section in a fucking swimming pool.

It's the same shit. It's crazy. Bro, the virus is so smart. It's an intelligent virus.

It's everywhere. They flew around the booth in paragliders over the border. Seeing people still wear it, though, to this day in cars alone?

Oh, my God. Bro, think how psychologically manipulated and fucked that person has to be.

Do you still do that? 100 %. They generally believe that they're going to die from-Yes.

It's sad, dude. It's sad. Those are the real victims of this entire thing. People who got forced into taking vaccine, people who have been manipulated to believe that this is going to kill them and still fucking believe that shit.

Those are the people that the 0.01% of germs that Lysol doesn't kill is them. Yeah, no shit.

That's a good point.

That's a great point, man. Yeah, man. Well, guys, jump in on this conversation. Let us know what you guys think down in the comments.

What do you think?

About what? Which part?

Just about this. Did you see how they criticized Trump for doing thumbs up in the photo? So he took a photo with the 13 13 families, and then he did thumbs up, and they fucking ran a story being like, Trump insensitive around the 13 families. He fucking did a thumbs up, and everybody else in the fucking photo, all the families were doing thumbs up. And this fucking piece of shit, Joe Biden was looking at his fucking watch when they were trying to shake his hand.

When they were coming off the plane with their body.

And they didn't say shit about it. No, they didn't. But they're going to fucking attack this dude for... Dude, listen.

Joe Biden and Kamla didn't even go.

I have been very middle of the But the more they start, the more they're doing this, the more... I'm just being real. It's making me love Trump. It's starting to make me be like, Fuck, I love this dude. These guys fucking hate him so bad. I'm starting to like him. Like a lot. Just because they hate him. Yeah, exactly, dude.

That's real shit.

Yeah. See that guy? That guy is handicapped. That's a handicap. That is trauma. That's trauma. You're fucking mom yelling at you when you're four years old. That's not trauma. That's trauma. Fucking pussies. Anyway.

Guys, jump in on this conversation. Let us know what you guys think down in the comments. Fucking trauma. Yeah. With that being said, let's get to our third and final headline. Headline number three. I think this one was interesting to bring back. We talk a lot or we've talked a lot about cancel culture on the show. You're 47 different fucking accounts that you've had.

Bro, that shit used to like... I went through down a dark hole with that shit because it was just like... I At one point, the second time that I got banned on Instagram, because Instagram was the hardest app for me to blow back up. So the second time that I got removed, I told myself, I'm never making videos again. I'm done. I was like, I'm done with this shit. I'm not doing it. That's what they want, bro. Yeah. So then I was working at an asphalt company. One of my buddies owns a big asphalt company in Jersey. I was working for him. I used to do that, too. I still work here and there whenever because I just have to, bro. I just like hands-on shit. It makes me mentally appreciate life more. So I remember I was just laying in bed, and it was fucking me up so much that I got in trouble for just saying what I wanted to say. I would have my boss all the time. He's like, Why don't you make an account? I'm like, Bro, I just can't get my... I can't get... That shit fucks with my head so much.

Just the internet.

Dude, I'm with you too, dude. It's the principle of it. Then the principle of it that I can't say... We can say what we want to say. A lot of this is self-censorship.

People do it to themselves.

Yeah, but it's the principle. And the principle that these people try to do that makes me more aggressive in the shit that I say.Makes you want to do it more, bro.It makes me want to irritate.

I literally look for hate now. I'll look for hate, and it puts fuel in the fire. Don't tell me my videos are good. I'm so over that shit. Tell me you hate my shit and you hate what I say. It's like, I'm going to come back fucking 20. I'll purposely look in the comments to find a hate comment, and I'll pin it. Because when I pin it, my followers, they fucking go right after the guy, and it just blows up the video even more. Or sometimes I'll make a fake Instagram account and make a fake hate comment and then pin it on my side. Engagement is the biggest thing on these apps. So, bro, I'll put a trans flag thing in my bio, and I'll pretend like I'm this fucking blue hair dickhead, and I'll just be like- You'll start to fight.

Yeah.

I start to fight, and they're all coming at me, and I'm reading my own comments, bro. It's hilarious. I'm like, wow, they're coming at me. I'm like, how little do they know? I'm looking at the DMs. The DMs are blown up because they're attacking me and shit. But I just do it as a way to just blow the videos up more because they just comment.

Dude, I miss that. I want to come back on Instagram I'm going to start posting again just so I could fucking deal with the dumbasses.

You must get fucking- Bro, I stopped doing it because I stopped posting because, bro, it would take hours of my day to communicate in the comments.

That's That's where my one account got removed because I kept going back at the comments.

They would come at me and I would be like, Fuck you, cunt. I would say crazy shit. I would say, Am I allowed to... I guess I could say what the fuck I wanted, fagging and shit. I could say that.

We already clarified this.

I would be like, Shut up, faggot. You wouldn't say that to my face because, yo, these people, they are such keyboard warriors. It's unbelievable. I got to the point I was sending these people my address. I was like, Yo, pull up right now, dude. I'll come outside with a bag of Skittles and I'll punch you right in dick.

Like, dude. Dude's going to beat up a nine-year-old kid.

A nine-year-old kid running off my step. And that's mostly what they are.

My mom says she'll drop me off in 15 minutes.

I got soccer right now, but she'll drop me off in five.

I'll give you the smoke. Bro, it's fucking... And I get it out even sometime. Like, literally last weekend, some dude tried to pick up for me for no reason. I'm like, Bro, I'm standing right here.

Bro, I am like, not... I have never, ever, ever in one fucking time in history, gone on someone's page and been a dick. But like, bro, when people start it, they deserve to get it finished. Bro, did you see that video Goob did on that chick? Goob, there was this girl. Did you guys see this? That big girl? So this big girl started talking. Goob did a fucking... If you don't know Goob, you're not on the internet. But so Goob did this video about this pedophile, and this girl clapped back at him and said, Oh, so you're going to dog pedophiles, but you lick Trump's boots? And he's like, What the fuck? And then she's in the DM's being like, Look at your little... Started insulting his appearance. And bro, so like, dude, he made this video that clapped back at her, and she's a big girl, and she's walking through the cornfield. He's like, Look, bitch. He goes, That's the closest you've ever been to a fucking vegetable. What? Bro, and normally I'm like, Bro, you can't do that because I'm not about it. But dude, when people start it, they deserve it. Yeah, bro.

Because I make fun of all the TikTok kids. That's how I blew up. I make fun of the kids that dance. They take their shirt off. They video themselves throwing a football.

Those gay faces.

Like, oh, dude, fuck, dude.

They're licking their lips and shit.

I have a serious problem, though. I have a serious issue. I enjoy pissing myself off for For some odd fucking reason.

I'm fucked in the head, bro.

I'll be deep in a dude's page, and I want to... Deep in a dude's what? That was crazy. No, did he? I'll be far in a fucking dude's page because I'm trying to find content to roast the fucking kid, but I'm sitting there and I'm in my bed like, Yo, fuck this kid, dude. Because at the time, when I was first making fun of him, I knew they were making a shit ton of money. Those TikTok kids were making crazy money at the time. Oh, yeah. So I was like, and I used to fucking hate that so much. And then they would make a video on me. They were like, Oh, you're using me for all this amount of views. And I'm like, Yeah, dude, your content is making my content. Keep fucking being a faggot.

Yeah, and you'll grow my page.

Yeah, appreciate it. That's awesome. Thanks, pal.

We should send a thank you note to the Democrats. We should.

Oh, yeah. They're helping you guys probably a lot.

Yeah, for sure.

Send them a bunch of merch. Yo, do what you did for me and you guys meet with, by the way, I can't wait to wear that.

A bunch of double-in it dildos.

That's crazy.

But yeah, so cancel culture, right? It's bullshit. I think we've been through the ebbs and flows, and we've talked about it. I think this is something interesting. This is an interesting article that just came out. Butt Light. Oh, God. Butt Light gets back to basics after culture wars backlash. They have made... I mean, you call it a complete 180, I guess, at least trying to attempt it.

I think somebody might have said, Hey, you dumb motherfuckers in Anheuser-Busch, go back to big trucks and beers in the mountain in America. Somebody said that. Yeah, somebody did say that. Abraham Lincoln. Wow. It was profound.

But certainly wasn't me. They made a 180, and they're starting to... I know Kid Rock. I don't know where his current stance is. I know he wasn't really fucking with him. But they're I got to bring some fresh new faces in, and they just did this big collab. Let's dive into this. So Bud Light has made a return to Vying for Laps with this new ad campaign series featuring stand-up comedian Shane Gillis.

He's a funny motherfucker.

He is fucking- That dude.

Hilarious. Next level. Hilarious. Next level, dude. Hilarious. That guy's great. I DMed him a lot of times. I'm very happy he didn't answer me because I don't deserve it. That's a funny guy. Yeah, he's fucking hilarious. He's fucking great, dude.

But yeah, so the beer brand became the focus of one of 2023's biggest culture wars when it partnered with transgender social media influencer Dylan Mulvaney for a small campaign. Bud Light gifted Mulvani, personalized not for sale cans of beer with his face on them to commemorate him for 365 days of living as a woman. Days of Girlhood video series. It was documented. His transition was a viral success, according to them. Oh, yeah.

It only cost them-He won a woman of the Year. Yeah, it only cost Bud Light $20 billion in market cap.

That guy fucked the company, dude.

Bro, fucked it.

Bro, really, man, it's that woke marketing check that fucked the company. She fucked all the beer truck drivers, all the independent distributors, our buddies up the road here. Dude, that one woman fucked so many people out of money and got them laid off and all kinds of shit because she wanted to promote this person with mental fucking illness for their fucking brand. Like, dude.

No. Well, now they got another guy with mental illness.

Yes. I always say there's three genders, male, female, and mentally ill. Yeah.

Bro, Peru just classified.

Oh, I saw that. Don't be using the chat for Peru.

Bro, they classified it like, No, you're mentally ill.

I say we all go there.

That's what it is. I'm out. That's what it is. But, yes, you had that happen, and now Now, AB InBev, they are now switching, and they just unveiled this new ad, Starring Shane Gillis, which is just in time for a college football season kicking off. So let's watch this ad. Let's see what we think about it. I thought it was pretty decent, but let's get your take on it. This is the new Bud Light ad with Shane Gillis.

Bobby, you've been accused of plagiarizing your master's thesis. If If you are found guilty, you will have to forego the football season. But if you confess, I will make it only half the season.

I'll make you a deal.

You tell the truth, you can have this ice-cold bucket of bud light. All you have to do is confess. All right, I'll go first. Grease the wheels a little. What? No. I confess that I practice my halftime speeches in the shower before games. Professor Wilkins, you want to confess anything? No. All right, I'll go for you. Professor Wilkins has been taking karate classes ever since that saxophone girl put him in a headline. That was a secret. Now it's a beer.

Everybody, let's focus, please. Hey, oh, we're having beers?

Yeah, all you have to do is confess and you get a bud light.

Oh, okay. When I order a pizza, I use a British accent, and now the girl at the pizza place thinks I'm British, and we've been dating for four months.

What? It feels good, right? Bobby, did you cheat? What's going on? All right, I admit. I'm afraid of horses.

Does that count?

Yeah. Yeah. You can go back to practice, big guy.

Okay. I got plenty of confessions.I.

Never read any of these books, and I'm really embarrassed about it.Thank you.Bye..

Quite a good time, governor.

That's really bad. She's falling for that? I think I love her. Franny fluid.

Hey, It's a step in the right direction.

It's a decent attempt.

You guys need to get about 10 times more aggressive. We need to go back to fucking good-looking chicks and fucking calendars and like, dude, like mechanic-looking dudes. The girls will like it, too, bro. We put a little grease on them. You can make one for the guys, one for the girls. Bro, everybody wants that shit. Everybody wants to laugh. Everybody wants to go back to being normal motherfuckers. I mean, this is a good step in the right direction. But Bud Light used to take that initiative, bro. Budweiser and the beer companies. Now you got beer companies trying to be motivational. Like, Oh, fucking Bob Sanchez fucking came out of the gutter in Mexico and drink Modelo. It's like, Dude, what the fuck? Have you not seen those commercials?

If you want to have your dick sucked, have a Bush.

There you go. There you go. Have a good time. You'll probably get dick sucking.

You want to get your nut off? Here's a fucking Budweiser That's right.

You want to beat your wife? Have a natural life.

You want to pop your first fucking clam in front of the audience? Have a fucking margarita.

Bro, I Stop just saying, man, that marketing used to be funny as fuck and true. Yeah. Like, dude, do you guys not remember? Joe, do you remember? Because you're the only one here, it's my age. Do you remember the fucking calendars and shit? Bro, tool companies like fucking Snap on. And Mac tools used to put out nude calendars. Like, titties out. No shit.

Yes. Like the firefighter shit. That's true, right? Yeah.

Like, bro, look, man, men like women. Women like men. Let's fucking market it. Like, bro, I don't know, man. Maybe I'm just stuck in the old ways.

It's so funny when I post a girl because my audience is 90 to 10. It's all men. So they obviously want to see some cans. So when I post a chick all the time, I always get shit for her because I'm posting them and shit. And I'm like, Are you gay then, dude? Maybe you're gay. Why are they? That's fine. But maybe you're gay. Dude. They bitch at me because I got a girl wearing my merch. Because I talk about how I hate OnlyFans' tics. I call them I do all this shit. So when I promote women in my shit, and I'm like, All right, next week, I'll have a different bitch in my shit.

And the funny thing is, you got all these girls taking photos all the time. I'm not talking about OnlyFans, girls. I'm just talking about girls in general. They're taking these sexy photos on Instagram, post them, and then when somebody does something, they get all pissed off. It's like, Bro, I looked at your page. You're popping your ass out every fucking picture. No hate for me, but I'm I'm just saying you can't get mad. You know what I'm saying? Dude, these double standards. If women want to be seen as sexy, then you can't complain about a man noticing.

You can't put the camera straight up your ass, too, dude. Yeah, you got to not do that. They propped it right up and you could see their fucking right inside of everything.

There's definitely too much. I'm talking about just the girls who do the bikini shoots and just the... They're all trying to be sexy, bro. That's cool. That's fine. I love that. But then they call you a misogynist when you notice it.

Oh my God, dude. I used to get called that all the time, bro.

It's probably true.

Bro, it would be a video of a girl in the pool, splashing her tits, and I'd be like, Miss, you have nice cans. And then they would call me misogynist, and I'm like, I just said compliment her. She has nice tits.

Yeah, but then every photo you go to... You know what's true, though? The ones that get mad are usually not. They're usually the same girl on the bar. It's She doesn't want to talk to you.

The cock blocker.

The cock block.

Oh, my God. They're always the fat ones. That's the worst, dude. I can't tell you how many situations I've been where I'm talking to a chick, and all I hear is, Dump, dump, dump. I'm like, Who's coming? She's like, Oh, one of my friends.

I'm like, God.

Then you hear the voice and it sounds like- Haley, get over here. Holy shit.

Are you talking to my friend?

He's not into you. Go fuck off, dude. I hate that shit.

The comment box was the biggest ones.

Where are we going to eat. I don't want to work out. I don't know what that is. I take after Wizzow.

She's not interested.

You haven't known, right?

My pronouns are KLB and LBS.

Kfc.

Yeah, no shit. Also Lisa, this other thing. We also talk about toxic masculinity. For a while, that was the narrative or behind everything. Now they're trying to push this new word, this new term called positive masculinity. Guess who they're trying to say is leading that effort?

Kamala's husband.

Yes. Tim Wall is a run Wait.

You mean fucking meth mouth? Yeah. Have you ever seen a motherfucker talk? He looks like he's high on fucking meth or coke or something. His mouth moves all kinds of weird. He looks like one of them old fucking kung fu movies where they put the fucking-The subtitle The English over the fucking dude's mouth. I will fight you. You are not ready for this one.

Oh, shit. He's delayed. Yeah.

He's delayed his voice. Watch the I'm not going to talk. I promise you, you'll see it.

The dude's got a buffering symbol over his forehead. Fucking asshole. Oh, my God. You did that. That was very well-executed.

I appreciate that.

Thank you. Nice job. Thank you. Fuck that picture.

Yeah, man. I don't know. But I still got some work to do.

Yeah, but I mean, I drink once since then. Remember?

Yeah, you did. I do remember that.

Yeah, you got a picture of it. I do have a picture of it. But that picture is going to stay in the archives.

It's a very interesting seating position.

Dj might have some blackmail on me, possibly.

When that whole thing was happened, I made a shirt, and it was the exact logo, but it said Shitlight, and it was awesome, dude. I made a whole can, and it said a drink made for pussies. It was sick.

Bro, I feel bad about it because I'm like, look at this woman who made this decision to fucking do this, to go against the legit culture of the entire brand that has existed for a hundred fucking years. And ruin the careers of these dudes who have worked their asses off to be a part. Bro, working for Anheuser-Busch because it's from St. Louis. So working there is a big deal, bro. It's a good job. It's a coveted job. And, dude, these guys are getting laid off because this fucking Ivy League stupid chick wants to include shit that none of the customers are about. You know what I'm saying? Dude, it's just fucked up.

Yeah, it's completely fucked up, man. So we'll We'll see. We'll see what else they got up their sleeves, up their cans.

Is he wearing a shirt of himself?

I don't know.

Who is that?

Jackie Chan.

What?

I don't know.

Is that Jackie? I think that's him. I think that's him earlier in life.

Bro, he should be having me cool.

That motherfucker is funny, dude.

Him and Theo Von, bro, I could go for-I think Shane Gill is the funniestest dude out.

His stand-up, what was that? Beautiful Dogs. Beautiful Dogs. Holy shit, man. Have you seen that show he did? It's like they're in the garage. They're working a tire place.

Yeah, I think I know what you're talking about.

It's pretty good, man.

That's the thing. I've seen a bunch of clips of shit like that, but I have no idea where the fuck to find it. It's on Netflix. Yeah, he's got good shit.

Shane, come on the show, dude. Let's do it. We'll have fun.

Let's do one. Yeah, guys, jumping on this conversation. Let us know what you guys think down in the comments. With that being said, let's get to our final segment of the show. As always, we have Thumbs Up or Dumb as Fuck. This is where we bring a headline in. We talk about it. It'll get one of those two options. So with that being said, a Thumbs Up or Dumb as Fuck headline reads. Philly couple getting busy in Range Rover accidentally roll into The River after they hit Gearstick while in back seat. Solid.

This is up in your hood somewhere.

Yeah. I mean, that's like another day in Philly. Yeah. Shit like that. I see videos all the time of girls fucking giving the dude roadhead, and he just goes right into a bowl. Oh, fuck. At least my man got some mop before he was on his way out to a pop smoke concert. Shit happens.

Yeah, that fucking sucks.

That's crazy. Was that recent? Yeah, yesterday.

What the fuck?

I didn't even hear about that.

I saw the video.

Just happened, yeah. It was gearing up to be a disastrous climax. A couple getting busy in the car nearly ended in tragedy after their SUV rolled into a Philadelphia River in the middle of the night while they were in the back seat. The Lovebergs were having sex in a 2020 Range Rover near the Scolkill... What is that?

I don't know. I think what you said. Scolkill?

Scholkill.

Scholkill River in Fair in my park around 4:15 AM, Wednesday, when one of their limbs bumped into the SUV's gear stick, police told MBC 10. Moments later, the Range Rover tumbled over the edge and sank into the water about two miles from Philadelphia City Hall. The unidentified couple jumped out of the SUV before the vehicle hit the water and plummeted beneath the surface. Police told the outlet neither was injured during the incident. Police told MBC 10 they suspect the couple were getting busy when the freak mishap The Range Rover was hoisted out of the river around 9:00 AM, the outlet reported. Images of the SUV show it was wholly submerged near the Strawberry mansion Bridge. Law enforcement shared that no charges are pending against the auto, Roy What the fuck is that? That's not a... Shorty was doing. Auto-hérosionist. What the fuck does that even mean?

I don't know, but it seems to me Shorty was... It's supposed to be a joke. She was doing backflips on that dick before she went on. She was doing backflips on that dick before she went on. What the fuck does that... Oh my God.

Sucks to suck.

What the fuck? Hopefully, he got his nut because that would suck if he didn't.

Are they alive?

Yeah, they're alive. Apparently, they jumped out right before it went in.

Also, they didn't actually get in the river.

No.

Damn. I wonder if their clothes were in the car.

This is another butt-ass thing. Yeah.

What happened?

I don't know. I was like, I'm a music man.

We're here for the future.

You're the aliens you've been looking for.

You see Terminator? That's us.

Fuck, man.

Yeah, well, it's definitely what.

Yeah, fuck.

That's a nice car, too, though. Yeah.

2020 Range Rover? Yeah.

That's wild. The fact that it's in Philly, I didn't know about that. It's crazy.

Yeah, what do we got on this? What do we got? Thumbs up? Dumb as fuck?

I mean, they're alive. Thumbs up. That's good. Yeah, that's good. I mean, he got his nut. He's just having a day. I don't know what Sweetheart's going through. Might be dramatic for her, but my God, they must have been doing fucking gymnastics in that back seat. How the fuck does that even happen?

I thought they had the dials on the fucking Range Rover.

I don't know.

Anyway. Dude, the more What do you think about this, this might be a fucking insurance job, though.

Yeah, this could be bullshit.

You know what I'm saying?

I roll my truck that I can't afford into the river.

That's a Philly thing, too.

That's also a Philly thing.

Yeah. You might be on to something with that.

My investigative fucking senses are just not adding up. How do you explain that to insurance? That was my question. It could have been stolen, too. That's also a Philly thing.

Oh, that's a massive Philly thing. They love doing shit like that.

That fucking sucks for them. I'm going to say thumbs down on this one. What do you guys got?

I'm going to say thumbs down because they're so stupid. They parked that close to the river. There's plenty of other places you could park. True. I don't know.

Where did you get?

I mean, why the fuck are you fucking in your car at 4:15 in the morning?

Yeah, that's weird.

That is weird. I mean, I've done it, dude.

Yeah, but at 4:15 in the morning?

Yeah, I wouldn't do that. That's crazy. I'm fucking sleeping. I've done it like nine at night.

Wasn't this on a weeknight?

No, Wednesday night. Oh my God. Wednesday morning, technically.

Yeah, so what the fuck? What's going on here?

Something weird. That's weird shit about that. All right. Yeah. Sweet.

All right.

Andy, that is all I got.

All right. Appreciate you coming out, Duke.Thank.

You for having me, boys.It's.

Good to see you, brother. That was fun. Best of luck with your Instagram accounts. I'm going to need it. Don't forget to follow Duke, Duke Gomez7.

And buy one of his shirts. 6, 5, 4, 3, and 2 as well.

Oh, yeah. The list goes on. But the merch is where it's at, dukeomes. Com. You can look as handsome as that guy. Maybe one day, probably not.

That's a stretch, though. Yeah, I know. No guarantee.

You'll never have a nose bigger than mine. I promise you that, sweetie.

All right, guys. That's the show. Don't be a hoe.

To the show. We're from sleepin' on the flow. Now my jury box froze. Fuck's the show. Don't be a hoe. To the show.