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Welcome to the big Sui. Presented by DraftKings Why are you listening to this show? The podcast that seems very similar to the other Dan Levitard podcast.

I'm sorry, I'm not going to apologize for that.

In fact, the only difference difference seems to be this imaging. I have been tempted in restaurants, just walking past tables to grab somebody's fries if they're just there. That hasn't happened to you guys.

I've done it.

And now here's the marching man to nowhere, fat face and the habitual liar. We have a handful of Halloween observations being made around here. Billy is worried about the future for lazy children. And stugatt. Wow. And Stugatt is popping edibles and mocking parents who still have to wander around with their kids and saying that he's making the claim that Halloween is better without kids than with them.

So it is. This was my second Halloween without my kids, okay? But last year, I still lived in a hotspot in my neighborhood. And there's an obligation that comes with living on one of the hot blocks. A hotspot. You have to get the house decorated. You have to make it an experience for the kids, even when your kids are off to college. But I've moved, and I've moved to an older part of my neighborhood, okay? A quieter part of my neighborhood. But Halloween without the kids. There is hope for you, Mike. There's hope for you, Billy. There is hope for all of you, okay? I am telling you, Halloween without the kids, so much better than Halloween with the kids. 06:00. Gummy goes in. 07:00, we're in the golf cart. Big G and T for me. Glass of wine for Abby.

As a passenger.

Exactly, yes.

With a chauffeur. We had a driver.

We had a driver. Yes, we did. Thank you. We had a driver. And so then I bring a little dog walker with me and we light it up. The driver's driving the golf cart, we light it up in the back seat, me and Abby, and Abby says to me, what are you doing? You just took a gummy. And I said, abby, nothing makes the gummy land like a dog walker. An hour and ten minutes later, drugs work.

Like, more drugs, more drugs.

You're going to die in a very stupid way. Probably while you kill Lucy.

So the driver takes us so the.

Driver takes us to the hotspots in the neighborhood where I used to live. And what we did is we watched people who were us ten to twelve years ago, and we just laughed at all of them, every single one of them.

I'm like, Abby, look at that.

Dad trying to get his kid to wait until he gets home to eat his Halloween candy.

This honestly sounds sad. It was like if I was walking around with my kids and I see just two random middle aged old people in a golf cart.

Exactly.

Laughing at me.

I'd be like, what is wrong, Stu? You're completely right. Because yesterday I went trick or treating, one of those big neighborhoods that no, he's right, because there's a bunch of golf carts that are all tricked out, have the Halloween lights on them, smoke machines or whatever. And those are the people having the most fun. The people walking sucks, right?

Can you guys look up South Florida thing?

Just golf carts everywhere.

I was mad yesterday because I was saying, these kids need to earn this candy because I was in a parade of wagons. Dan. Like, I brought a wagon because I had a bunch of crap that I need to carry.

And I'm like, I don't want to.

Carry that for blocks and blocks and blocks. And what happens when you have a wagon? The kids jump in it. So we had like three or four wagons, and kids are just being wagoned from house to house. They just get down and get the candy and it's like, hey, walk. If you're getting candy, walk. We're not going to be dragging around in wagons. What's going on here? And then I felt judged because I didn't know all the people that I was with. And I was walking with my dad who was carrying the wagon, and I was trying to have this conversation with him, but I didn't want to be the rude person that's criticizing other people that are doing the wagon situation while I'm doing it myself. Honestly, I thought I was smart. I was like, you know what? This is really smart, Billy. You should take the beach wagon out. You can put everything in there. If Mia gets tired, just hop her in the wagon she can roll on. We can go on with more candy. And then I saw the other dads with the wagons. I'm like, oh, I'm a dad now.

I'm not smart. I'm lazy.

Do you believe we are raising entitled children?

Oh, yeah.

The world's going to end me.

I mean, there are a number of different reasons the world I know, but.

These kids are going to be too lazy to even swim when the water comes and overtakes them.

I wasn't even talking about the water.

I thought Adam McKay was.

This time it was not water. This time I was just thinking about all of the other ways, including trolleys, that one can die. Can you please look this up for me? Because I don't believe that trolleys are responsible for a lot of deaths. But I may have this claiming lucy is claiming that trolleys work at a rate of speed that is underrated.

It was a trolley bus, so it was a bus that looked like a trolley. And it was very traumatic. I got anxiety for like two weeks after just crossing that intersection because that thing moved so fast that it had to trigger the emergency brake and it was stuck there for like 20 minutes.

Can you guys find for me as much information as you possibly can on trolley deaths? I am now obsessed with finding out.

I assume San Francisco's catbird.

That'd be a very good guess as a favorite, but I just when that.

Comes in, I'm going to be so psyched. So many people are getting murdered by trolleys and SF.

Do you think you'll be as happy? Put it on the poll. Who was happier, david Sampson talking about firing managers or Mike Ryan imagining San Francisco pedestrians dying by trolley? Can you get for me? Because a lot of people were talking yesterday about Wembanyama they win late stugas. They were down by 20. There were a couple of back and forth dunks, a couple of ridiculous shots Wembanyama made. Mike Ryan continues to be the nation's loudest. Wembanyama hater.

I don't understand why you guys are so weird. No, you guys are the weird ones. The guy is 8ft tall. He does not need your help. This is not a lovable underdog story. You guys are essentially just the guy that is the cowboys, Yankees, Laker fan. You're just a bunch of front runners and skews me if I think it's an unfair advantage and I don't want to throw my support additionally to this guy.

I can't believe what you guys are unfair advantage.

It is unfair.

Jokic is an unfair advantage. I don't see you clamoring him to.

I'm not a big jokic guy. Well, I think it's also but the.

Weird part about this is this isn't like an on air bit that you're just doing. Like, we walk in and you're just screaming about Wemby in the middle of the office. People are trying to eat.

Have you seen the video?

He lays it up right here. What happened was oh, he's looking look at him. He's slender man. Throw up the video right now. He's so funny because he's so big. I'm telling you, that height, what you're pointing at, what you're gaffawing at, that right there is unfair.

It's a good costume. We were just talking about what not everyone can pull off this costume. He's maybe the one person in the world that can rock this costume.

Oh, his hands are huge.

He did it and it looked great.

Tell you what, next Halloween, dress up as someone that doesn't have five turnovers a game.

He's 19, Mike.

Absolute liability as a ball handler.

Absolute liability as a dress up as Steve Nash.

This is the thing, though. It's not a bit. He was doing this during our I.

Don'T understand why you're like, oh, let's root for this guy.

And even those who wouldn't listen. We're getting it.

Someone has to be the person. Somebody has to be a hater. Integrity of the game. You're literally should not be playing basketball. You don't even like Cooper.

I have a higher rim.

Seriously, I'm the only person that's like that's not fair. That's not fair. Let's root against this guy because he has all the advantages in the world. You guys are just a bunch of front runners. If you're rooting for Victor Wembanyama, you really are.

But then you must also hate LeBron James because he is physically gifted in a way that makes it unfair for other people to play basketball.

8Ft tall. And that's a difference.

It does make it easier.

Mike is right about that.

There's other guys the same height in the NBA.

No one's that height 74. No one's that height with those hands and that length. Come on.

There are a couple. Come on.

No one's like that.

Jack was saying last night, we've seen this before. Bull bull is wandering around.

Finally, someone with common sense. We have he should stop dribling the ball.

But he says that Wembanyama shaq does. There was more context to that. He says that Wembanyama will be good. He was not actually comparing him to the skills of bowl bowl, but he was saying, we have seen this before. But what you're arguing, Mike, you're basically going to Disney World. You are seeing the kids there for the first time, seeing something they've never seen before and saying to them, why are you rooting for this? Why are you rooting for the big Disney giant?

What I'm doing is I think I'm a freedom fighter that is signaling the same flares that many people I'm sounding a Klaxon. All right. I'm sounding the Klaxon right now about artificial intelligence, climate change, and Victor Wempanyama. He's in the same class. It cheats the game.

The Disney analogy, dan is a really good one because Mickey is the biggest of the mice I've ever seen. Like, look at a normal mouse. A normal sized mouse couldn't pull off this kingdom.

And also, how is Pluto, who's a dog, smaller than Mickey Mouse?

Well and there's the whole Goofy thing, too, but Goofy is confusing because it's goofy a dog, but is dating Clarabelle the cow. It's like an inner species thing there.

But here is what's happening with Mike. It's not now that Mike is afraid of because I don't think people are actually rooting for Wemby. I think they're just awed by seeing something that doesn't have any kind of relation to anything you've seen from a human being athletically before. But what Mike is worried about is if that becomes dominant, it ruins the whole sport. He will have such an advantage over everybody.

So you guys are worried about the sport being ruined. We're not just Mike hating on some random.

That's all I'm doing. He seems like a nice guy, fun loving. I understand why all of you are falling for it. I really do.

We thought this about Giannis a couple of years ago. It did not ruin the sport.

Yeah, well, he can't make a free throw, thankfully. There's something we got to find the Achilles heel. Right now, it's turnovers. That's all we have.

KD is four inches smaller than Wemby. I don't see you claiming for him to stop because all these ruining the.

Game, that's four inches.

Four inches is nothing. You know that.

Can you put up, please, the photograph last night? Because a lot of people were enjoying the physical length of both of these human beings. And I know a lot of people are celebrating. Look at KD, how amazing he is that he could make that shot over the outstretched arm and the giant hand of Wembanyama. But my takeaway from that was, holy shit. I've never seen someone that size who could guard KD, because that is a contest. That is a contested shot. I know everybody's looking at what Kevin Durant is doing there.

And look, he's barely off the floor. Imagine when he learns how to jump straight up with both hands. This is a problem, guys.

It looks like a photoshop where you would extend his arm by, like, pushing it forward, but it's actually his real life.

I've never feared a minus. Three more.

He can't make threes yet either.

No. And he keeps taking them. And he's got a good coach over there, honestly. I know you want to go for the temptation of him bringing the ball up court because it looks good, but if Pop knows anything, just fundamentals. Keep him in the post and teach him how to be a big. Man to throw two hands up there and then add those dimensions to his game so you can take the guy's career, which I don't want to be. Good. I want to be very clear about that. You're telling rude against him.

You're telling Pop how to coach his play.

I don't think he knows what he's doing.

I really don't.

Jessica White he's lost the plot.

Worst bit. That's not a bit.

It's not a bit.

It's not a he again, he seems.

Like a very nice show.

He seems like a very nice guy. But the fact that you're all rooting for this, it's like a Fisher Price hoop up there.

Can you admit it's a good costume?

I won't even give him that. He doesn't need more support.

Don Lebotard.

We need to establish him some reasonable doubt. Yes, exactly.

More than you do.

Stugats.

I always like leaving hand on the chicken because he's so vulnerable. I just unfairly fade down the chicken.

So just leave him by himself.

This is The Dan Levatar Show with The Stugatz.

I just got to see behind the curtain at one of the magicians great tricks. Stugatz is no longer here. He has a golf outing with Chris Cody, and Bob does sports on the company dime. Stugats is golfing. And he was supposed to be here for a couple of hours, but this is the magic at work. I just saw he has his backpack on. He is clearly leaving. And I ask him, are you leaving? And he points over his shoulder and says, Mike told me to leave. And then Mike comes in here, and I witness him saying to Stugants, I didn't tell you to leave. And he's like, yeah, you did. And Mike was like, nope, just saw that you put your backpack on, and that's pretty much a sign that you're leaving, because why would you sit in the seat if you weren't leaving? So he's going to golf. Billy, you're familiar with his work in this area?

Well, this is actually a great trick that was pulled today because he said to everyone all week that he was not coming at all today because he had to go golf. So then what happens is he comes for an hour, so he's doing everyone else a favor. And also the person golfing with him today is Chris Cody, who couldn't be here because he was going to golf. So now by him coming for an hour, it seems like Chris Cody could have been here for an hour but didn't come today. And I don't know that it was ever communicated to Chris that Stugattz changed his mind and decided to come today when he couldn't originally come today came for an hour. So we should say thank you for coming for an hour, but then leaves even though no one told him to leave.

A magic trick. He looks better than Chris Cody. Looks like he cares more. Chris Cody clearly deserves the time off because he's tired from making that Halloween costume. That was a fork in the road.

David said that was the best costume.

My favorite part about going in there confused because his whole argument for me telling him to leave was, remember when you said, Are you leaving? He thought that that was me telling him, go ahead and leave.

Apparently, he did technically say leave.

Are you leaving? I don't understand. He also said he was going to be here for the entirety of the Big Suey, yet one segment in, he says goodbye.

It's all about intonation. In print, it all sounds the same, but are you leaving? That means, like, oh, man. Are you leaving? And it's like, are you leaving? Means get out of here. So how did you say Are you leaving?

And not the way that he would take it that I told him to leave.

Did you text it? Did you see it in print? Because then there's the confusion.

He had his backpack up very clearly leaving, and I asked him, hey, are you leaving? And he's like, yeah, you told me to just now when you asked, Are you leaving?

They are great mind tricks. Also, what I witnessed was Mike Ryan saying to him, hey, we've only done one segment of Big Suey. And Stu gott's looking in his face and saying, so we've done two segments of Big Suey.

It happened just like that.

It happened just like that. And it's because his mind is fried from drugs.

Wait, to be clear, what was the gap in time between you saying one segment, and I just did it the way that it happened.

Blow for blow right there. That's the way it happened.

In fact, it made me feel for Mike. Mike has Odly developed more patience as he's more tired with all of the dysfunction around here than he's ever been? I was oddly surprised that Mike, after saying that quickly, wasn't befuddled or stunned because I was standing next to it to have conversationally happen. Mike Ryan tell Stugatz we've done one segment of Big Suey, and Stugats clap his hands as he's leaving and say, so we've done two segments of Big Suey. That's how that happened.

As an outside observer, I don't know if it's that he's developed more patience or he's giving an F less.

That's the one.

It's probably that one. Because here's the thing, they look the same.

Because if we're going to kind of.

Peel back the fourth wall, let's do it a means here. So if Cigats gets up and a mean slides in, like, a little convenient I mean, it's pretty great.

It's pretty great.

I didn't say that he emerges. I'm just saying Mike has options.

Certainly an upgrade from an honesty standpoint.

Well, but it might not be an upgrade from a delirious standpoint because Amin came in here and looked at me, and when I looked in his eyes, he looked a bit crazed, and he was wearing yesterday on him. Whatever it is that happened yesterday, I've been wanting to talk to him about this James Harden trade.

So we've done two segments of victory now.

The James Harden gets what he wants tour is really amazing to watch. What are you spreading your arms for as if this is your victory lap?

It is my victory lap, because months ago, when James would say, Dale Moore's a liar and Damien Lillard's showing up to Portland's practice facility, say, I just want to get to know the young guys. That's not how you do it. Do you want something in the NBA as a superstar? You don't ask nicely, you don't try to be polite. You don't go along to get along. You make a big effing mess. And yes, everyone had jokes and the AI memes of fat James Harden not being allowed on the plane by two TSA agents wrestling, all that stuff. But at the end of the day, one guy got to go exactly where he wanted to go and one guy didn't. And it goes to show everything that I've been saying from the beginning, if you want something in the NBA, you don't play nice, you don't be a professional. You make a huge effing mess. And that's how you get to where you want to go.

Let's get to that sound from all the smoke. They do a great job on that show and on those adjacent shows. And Kendrick Perkins was on with them and was talking, I think, about the time that they were teammates at OKC and this is what Kendrick Perkins had to say about that. James Harden. This is 14.

This is his first appearance in the NBA Finals. They lose in five to Miami.

So it's about ten years ago or more around there. Let's see what we've got here.

Man, James ain't give us shit. And you know why? King of diamonds and everything caught a hole in his ass, man. See, in San Antonio look, in San Antonio, he didn't have a damn thing to do. Shit, yeah, we got the motherfucking Miami shit. It was everything motherfucker do. We couldn't get that motherfucker to buy a bucket in that motherfucker.

He showed killing us in San Antonio, bro. God damn.

Yeah, he had to get his wrist in Miami. He couldn't get his wrist. Mother was out here motherfucking night.

He couldn't get his rest. It's that obvious. That because San Antonio doesn't have a thriving strip club commerce community. James Harden plays better there empirically, because he can't be as tired.

You know what the irony is? It's always funny to me how players find their rhythm or find their routine. Right. Steven Jackson, who's in that clip, played on the 2007, We Believe Warriors, the ones that upset the Dallas Mavericks in the first round. Do you remember what happened to them in the second round? Does anyone remember?

They got beat up.

They got beat up by the Utah Jazz and they lost in five.

That was a great Mavs team, and.

That was best record in the league.

One of what, like at the time, only the second eight seed to ever beat a one seed. It hadn't happened very often.

Yeah, it was still a rarity at that point. The third, I believe the first was.

In the best of seven. I think it might have been the first because there was the Nuggets and then the lockout shortened season where the Knicks beat the warriors.

Team was so much fun.

So apparently that team, their thing was, after every game, we're going out. If it was a home game, they went out to there's a bar in Oracle that they would go to. They had a drink called simply The Best. It was their signature concoction. And they went out hard every night. And so against Dallas, they were going out hard every night and playing great. When they got to Utah, they couldn't go out. And so it messed their rhythm up. And they say that's why they lost that series is because they couldn't go out. In the case of James Harden in Miami, he could go out and he went apparently too hard, and it all fell apart. But I believe it as a 23 year old, 24 year old, I could see that happening.

How about as a 33 year old, which is what he's doing now, and going to Los Angeles, I could see it happening more. Mike, when you see this happen, as someone who's been hurt by Lillard, not being in Miami and the course correction of GMs grabbing the power back with Damien Lillard as the central figure. When James Harden does everything he does and has less value at this point in his career than Damien Lillard and gets exactly what he wants, maybe at least in part because he has less value, do you find yourself getting mad that Lillard is the only one that didn't get exactly what he wanted?

Yeah, I've been mad about that for a while. That Lillard could never, for the last few years find the right approach. Not the right approach. It's the wrong approach. Well, we can all agree it wasn't effective in getting what he wants. And I don't understand how James Harden always gets what he wants. And what it does for me, as a Heat fan, just fuels this kooky conspiracy theory that I have is part of the problem is I don't want guys to go to Miami. Now, I don't understand why would would feel that way, being that they're in a different conference, but the way that the Lillard thing was covered in the media let's just look at ESPN and Woje was totally different. Now, Harden, you could argue, is at a similar stage in his career as Lillard. So what is going on here? Fewer takers? Possibly. But for whatever reason, Lillard's pursuit of Miami and Miami's pursuit of Lillard was just covered differently than all these other ones. And it's weird. Why is it different? It can't be different because he's been the most loyal guy. What are the variables at play here? And as a Heat fan, I just think haters.

Haters is what I think.

Thank you.

Pedro Bang agrees with you. Just real quick, I mean, the Clippers are going to be what? James Harden is going to be what? Those are three players and are in. George Kawhi and James Harden. Those are all guys who need to have the basketball.

Do you want me to give you the most optimistic version of why I think this could work? I'm not on this, but if you ask me to be the most optimistic version of myself, it's worth it for.

The Clippers to try it, is it not? They're giving up next to nothing for Star Power ballmer wants to make them relevant, wants to keep them in the game. It makes sense for them to try it. Whether it works or not.

It's not next to nothing. I think, people, it's next to nothing of what's here right now. Those picks which are unprotected, that first round pick in 2028, five years from now, which is very likely, none of these guys are going to be there to see it. Right. But in terms of the right now, the biggest thing that James Harden can provide this team is the concept of insurance. Right. What has the Clippers problem been?

That's a great point. Right?

Guys are hurt. Guys are unavailable. Guys are not there you throw enough.

Fragile guys, surely one of them's got to be healthy.

James Harden is going to have one of these games with nine threes. Just because Kawhi and Paul George aren't.

Playing, he won't sweat an injury so much. Honestly, if they're all healthy, there might be more of an issue than if, like, they're better off.

They are legitimately better off if they're not all healthy.

There's one guy that needs to be.

Healthy at the end. Not all season, just at the end.

Don Lebotard.

He needs a wheelbarrow like Mike McDaniel. This dog got a pair, man. Does he get a pair. My granddaughter sees his schlong.

What's that?

She doesn't.

My granddaughter saw his schlong in the kitchen and she said, what is that?

What is this, a game of Clue?

I said, that's what he peas with.

How else am I going to still.

Got it was a little extended. I don't know why he was so excited.

All right. Very good, baby.

No, can I take this out?

It is a baby.

Anyway, he ate my couch.

This is the Don Levatar Show with the stugat.

With a giant smile on his face and a delirious look in his eye. Amin came into this studio excited and said, have you guys talked about what Dabo Swinney did?

Tyler.

The answer to your question is yes. I believe it was yesterday's finest segment, just roaring with laughter at Amen, a series of condescensions and fury that Dabbo unleashed on Tyler, who I told yesterday we were in hot pursuit of Tyler. We came very close to getting Tyler, but have not yet found Tyler. We want to do the follow up interview to what Dabo did to Tyler.

Tyler.

So I'm sorry it's off the table, but what is still on the table for you, Amin, is the magical story of Connor stallions. What happened?

I just one thing. Did you guys talk about Tony Elliott?

We did not.

Oh, that's my favorite part about how.

He discovered Tony Elliott. My favorite game, two national championships.

My favorite part is he's like, I took Tony Elliott's bum ass off the street. He ain't even had a pot to piss in. And I made him into a national championship twice. Who could have done that? And somewhere Tony Elliott's like to do with me, man?

Just be Carolina like, I'm not that bad.

The fact that Tony Elliott's in his office somewhere, because where does he coach now?

Virginia?

He's like, in his office and it's, huh oh, Davo went off. Let's hear this call. And he's like, oh, my God. That's classic Davo. And then he goes into Tony Ellison.

Tyler, what's this gotta do with me, man?

Well, we were laughing more than that at just him listing his credentials and saying, I wanted to be a father, and I have three like, I can imagine his three kids being like, What, dad? We're just trophies.

The media has been very mean. To me and I would just like to say that now that the Stanford Cardinals in the ACC, I'd like to see that tree. That tree's got a big old mouth. Tyler.

Hey yo, Tyler, I am here. Coach is horny.

I want her to be free with good looking mascot.

That's all I'm saying.

Tyler with the impersonations, even if they all sound like Jimbo Fish like horny.

Now wait a second, you're stealing my bit, Tyler.

I want to talk though, about Connor.

Stallions because I can't believe that's his name.

It's a real name.

That's not a real name.

For those of you who do not know, we don't know what's real or not real about this person. And we're about to do an investigation because this person is Michigan adjacent. His name is now on all of our minds because this keeps getting funnier and weirder and Harbaugh might have to flee Michigan and in disgrace because what might be uncovered here has the possibility of being a great combination of funny and embarrassing.

And every day there is something new that comes out and teams are cooperating. And yesterday the Athletic posted a piece that featured photos of someone who is purported to be Connor Stallions. And Jim McElain had a press conference addressing these photos saying we don't know who that person is on the sideline. Connor stallions was not credentialed.

This is a central Michigan game.

That's where Jim McElwain is right now on your screens. You're seeing someone in a very poor disguise with Central Michigan hat and sunglasses at night on the sideline. And there are additional photos of him going as far to fist pump when there's a play that goes in Central Michigan's direction. This is allegedly Connor Stallions, the Michigan staffer that has been their spy of sorts. Now, if you're looking at these photos, you probably want a little bit more evidence, but we have for you a face morph and it would appear that the person in question, the mysterious Central Michigan chippewa staffer, might indeed be Connor Stallions.

So this was at Michigan State. It was, I believe, a season opener. Central Michigan at Michigan State. So it makes sense that he was there. One of the funnier parts is there were a lot of plays that went over towards that sideline. And if we saw allegedly Connor stallions every time would pull his hat down or hide his face or try to avoid the camera when he knew that it was going to be in his direction. If that was him, which I believe it was.

It was also a Friday night game and the Michigan game was the next day. So it was feasible that he could have been at both. And the fact that Central Michigan is still not sure who it is, even though no one's come forward yet and been like, that's me, guys, obviously it's.

Me, that's not that guy I was credentialed.

That does, it does give pause it also just seems so absurd that this could like, there's so many cameras on the sidelines. How would you get away with it?

I love how oversized his hat is, and it just looks like such a bad disguise. There is an honor amongst thieves when it comes to this stuff, and a lot of people would prefer that you don't dig into this stuff because a lot of coaches from Whispers I've heard do something like this. But having someone like this, this is unprecedented. Having someone disguised as a saffer on another team is a whole new level.

I'll bite. Why what possible gain does he have from infiltrating Central Michigan staff?

Well, he was stealing the Michigan State signs, allegedly, if they were playing, and they played Michigan State last weekend. So that would be, I presume, the reason that people were looking into this in the first place. Because someone's watching this now, going back and saying, was this guy on the sidelines at other games? And can we catch him on film?

He couldn't have done that from a regular seat in the stands.

That's part of the allegations. But this would be perhaps his greatest caper.

There was a Bruce Feldman story that came out this morning where he interviewed a bunch of college football coaches anonymously and asked them to say their honest opinion about, like, is this something that you think is a big deal? Is this something that you do? Should this be taken seriously? And it did seem like the overwhelming majority of college football coaches do think that this is like, so far not necessarily the Central Michigan thing, because we don't know if that's him or not. But what we do know so far, it is a really big deal. And it's not something that every team does. They don't all electronically steal signals, and they're not all flying staff across the country to videotape from the opposing sidelines. So whether you believe that or not, because I think a lot of college football coaches have a reason to lie about it or to at least pretend like they're holier than thou situation, they do all seem fairly pissed off about it still.

So Nebraska is playing Michigan State this weekend. If you're Nebraska, you 100% hire someone that looks like that to be on your sideline, right? Like, everyone in the Big Ten should be getting someone that looks sort of like that dressed up on their sidelines just to get it on film, just to bring down Michigan.

Right.

So he allegedly went to every Big Ten stadium except for one. And I know for a fact he did not go to an Iowa game. He was like, we don't need those signs.

We're good. I don't even think they have signs. We're fine, Jim. We don't need it.

It's either paper, rock, or scissors.

The sign they have is a stop sign.

It just says punt. I don't know what I'm supposed to.

Do can we just for a second, though? Like, we can sit here and talk about all how common is this? How common is it not? How much of an advantage does it give you? How much does it not? But the sheer brazenness of having someone in a disguise on a staff he doesn't belong to is one kind of hilarious, but the next kind of hilarious is how does no one on Jim McElwain's staff look to their right or left and ask, who is this person who is standing here with us?

I could totally see it happening when your staffs are all locked in on a game, doing their job. If you look at a college football sideline, there's a bunch of people that are in the background wearing team issued polos, and you don't know what they do. They could be filling up gatorade bottles. They could be analysts hired when you're locked in on a game, someone wearing a cent. They could be staffers from the administration. You don't know. You figure if someone has a credential and they're wearing a Central Michigan polo, someone gave them access.

Yeah, there's tons of people on the sidelines that like lucy and I have both been on the sidelines of college football games, and you just kind of blend in with the crowd. You work in the media. You get a media credential. It's not a look at me, but that's fine. I'll take it. I'm very cool. There's a lot of people on most of these big college football staffs. If you're a white guy with a hat, it's kind of easy to blend in. Lucy and I might stand out.

If you're watching somebody on the sidelines and you're not focused on the game, let me know so we can fire that person. You're supposed to be focused on the game, budy. Don't be looking around. Don't go, hey, who's this guy?

Hey, don't worry about that guy. Worry about the eleven guys right there.

I like this.

Thank you.

I like the idea of the staffer that finds out, like, hey, that guy's not on our staff. And Jim McElain is like, thank you. Also, clear your see you, get out of here.

The other thing I liked from the Bruce Feldman article that came out in The Athletic was that a few reactions were like, yeah, this is pretty crazy, but it's actually even crazier that they got caught. This is really like, we're all doing something like this, but this is by far the sloppiest operation. This guy had a manifesto.

Dan, tell me about this. Do you think this is the only time he tried this approach? Because I need more photos in different regalia.

500 pages was the manifesto. What do we know about the manifesto?

He wrote a manifesto with his idea of how to make Michigan. This was Richard Johnson from Sports Illustrated. Put this article out last week. Very good reporting. Everyone should go read it. It was a manifesto about his ideas for the Michigan football program. And the word manifesto alone, in combination with the state of Michigan should alarm people.

He hates democracy and gluten.

Can we please put up on the screen just the photo? Because I did not know that Jim McElwain was the central Michigan coach. The most famous moment in Jim McElwain's career.

You know this isn't him.

I do know it's not.

Can we have the face morphing over his ass only?

We're going to need to do that investigation. This is not Jim McElwain, we are told. Reportedly, allegedly, McElwain has denied this in the most serious of fashions, but this is he was asking a press conference.

Are you naked on a shark? Caleb Presley of Barcelona did the greatest in depth reporting on this I have ever found out I've ever seen on it. And they actually found the guy that was on the shark and Jim McElain. There's a great moment where Jim McElain shakes that guy's hand, he goes over to Central Michigan and Jim McElain finally meets this person that is actually on the Shark.

And that man, of course, was Connor Stallion in a disguise.

It's obvious this isn't the Shark. Picture isn't Jim McElain, because a college football coach is not going to have that good of a tan. They're always cruting. They're not anywhere with their shirt off. And this guy's got a very obvious ass to shirt tan line.

How does that man feel? The man who's not Jim?

He looks happy.

But maybe he was a good sport about it.

When you're naked on a shark, I don't think that you really care, dad.

You may not. I do wonder, though, if people who love that person wonder to themselves whether they want to see all of him go viral.

How's the shark feel? No one asked that question.

I think he feels great. They're in second place in their division in the Mac right now.

They feel a little rough to the touch.

By the way, big win over Northern Illinois last night.

I meant how did the Shark feel emotionally?

The shark? And this part gets overlooked because it takes a dark turn. The shark is dead. Yeah, sorry.