All of the things that were in my life came apart and out of a choice that was choosing me in my, like, most honest and true way, even though it was painful for me and it was painful for the people and the things around me.

I've never heard you talk about your marriage or divorce with these things before.

I never have. I had asked for a separation and with the intent to work through, asked for separation, and then ten days later, my dogs were killed by coyotes. Yeah. Wow. I am so emotional today. It's not about being straight or gay or bi or queer or. It's more about, I think I'm just learning, like, what love is, and I love people. My tightest group of friends that, you know, were within my orbit also didn't show up for me the way that I needed it. I was like, I've made a mistake. I've made a mistake trying to hold on to these friendships, trying to hold on to these things that, like, the minute I let go and I said, they need to be on their own journey. They don't understand mine right now. And that's okay. That's okay. I cannot abandon myself in this moment. Like, I have to stay true to myself, and this is the first time I've ever done that. I was getting ready to launch kinergy.

On tour with Oprah, and I felt so out of integrity or out of, like, alignment that I'm about to start this company, which is all about helping people connect to themselves and living their most expanded free self. And I'm like, what am I doing? I'm blowing up my life.

And I.

Have to go and perform on stage, which is, like, the, you know, the.

The whole purpose is to help people.

Like, connect to themselves. And I'm feeling very disconnected right now.

I was like, okay, this is. This is not easy, but I'm going to intentionally create my life now instead of do the thing that I think I'm supposed to do. I remember having this, like, absolute knowing of, like, divine, you know, God and grace and, like, feeling, like, so protected and so held. I don't want to repeat. I don't want to repeat patterns. I don't want to act from my five year old, my four year old self, my ten year old self, my 15 year old self, or even my 25 year old self, you know, like, I want to act from the woman who has gone through everything that I've gone through and is acting from this place in this chair right now.

The Emmy award winning, two time dancing with the Stars champion and now host of the show award winning actress, performer, singer, songwriter, producer, entrepreneur and author of the brand new book everything we never knew. Julianne Hough, welcome to the Jamie Kern Lima show. Before we jump into this episode, I'd love to invite you to join this community to hear more interviews and one on one conversations with me and you to help you truly believe in yourself. Trust yourself and know you are enough so that you can become unstoppable in living your best life. All I want you to do is click on the follow or subscribe button on the app that you're listening or watching this episode on. I love your support. It's incredible to see your comments and how many people you're sharing these episodes with, and I'm so grateful to be here with you and I'm excited to go on this journey with you. So thank you for subscribing and following the Jamie Kern Lima show. It means so much to me. Who you spend time around is so important as energy is contagious and so is self belief. And I'd love to hang out with you even more, especially if you could use an extra dose of inspiration.

Which is exactly why I've created my free weekly newsletter that's also a love letter to you, delivered straight to your inbox each and every Tuesday morning from me. If you haven't signed up to make sure that you get it each week, just go to jamiekarn lima.com to make sure you're on the list and you'll get your one on one with Jamie Weekly newsletter and get ready to believe in you. If you're tired of hearing the bad news every single day and need some inspiration, some tips, tools, joy and love hitting your inbox, I'm your girl. Subscribe@jamiekernlima.com or in the link in the show notes, Jamie Kern Lima's her name.

Everybody needs Jamie Kern Lima in their life.

Jamie Kern Lima Jamie, you're so inspiring.

Jamie Kern Lima.

We can borrow courage and we can borrow strength, and sometimes we need to. Sometimes we feel like we don't have it and we see someone else saying, well, I'm on this journey and here's how I navigated it. And here's, you know, having a revelation in real time and just kind of, you know, I think, I think for a lot of us, healing is like a lifelong journey, as is stepping into our authentic power and also just taking a look back. You called it unraveling, I think unraveling like where our habits and our patterns and our wiring and all the things come from and then almost like taking our power back in a way. And there's going to be people of every single age that are sharing this conversation with you and me right now who maybe even haven't started the unraveling yet, but they're ready to. And I know when you talk about the many ways that unraveling has happened in your life, in particular in the last eleven years, you know, getting married, you've shared that. You even in that journey and even through the marriage, still on a journey of discovering who you are sharing with your partner.

Can you talk about just that? I'm gonna call it the hero's journey, right, of this is the hero's journey. Can you share that journey, of that and that season in your life? And.

Yeah, so, you know, I met my ex husband when I was 25. When we met, we were in different locations. He was in DC playing and I was in LA, and I would go back and forth and I was. It was interesting. It was like I was so focused on, all right, I have not given my heart open to anybody, really, because I've been so like this that I need to open my heart and give, give, give, give in a free way. That's not like trying to get anything in return. And so I went so the extreme that I would go back and forth to DC every other week and I stopped taking care of what I wanted to do and I wouldn't put myself on tape for auditions anymore. And I went very much into the season of relationship. It went into that extreme, like, I like to call it manic because I want to take the stigma out of manic. Manic is just extreme and it can be quite jarring and reaction based. And that was very much how I lived. A lot of my upbringing was reaction based. Once something happened, I'd go this way and I'd go this way.

And so I went full force ahead into relationship. And it was amazing. And I will tell you, it was the greatest thing that could have happened to me at that time in my life. Because what I needed at that time was to reconnect to my ten year old self. And what did I need at ten? I really needed safety and like, almost like a father figure to come in and be that grounding force of stability. And. And so I think a lot of our dynamic was this little girl feeling and this stability and stable man to be there. And so he provided such a beautiful foundation for me to be a little girl. And as that was the dynamic of our relationship, I was able to start that healing, not the healing from ten before, but the healing from ten on. And so when I started going through all of that journey, I started becoming more of a woman. And when that was happening, I was starting to listen to my voice more, not the ten year old voice that was making decisions subconsciously. And as that was happening, things started changing, and things in my mindset, like, what do I believe in?

Not just what I've either been taught, told, or had to do to get where I'm at today. And so as that started happening, I really started shifting and changing and questioning what I believed in.

Were you married at this point?

Yes, we were married.

You were married by this point?

We were married. And I want to be very mindful. That is a very, like, coming out is one of the most vulnerable and empowering things that you can do. And I think, for me was very much like you. Like, it's not about being straight or gay or bi or queer or. It's more about, I think. I think I'm just learning, like, what love is. And I love people, and I don't know what I'm attracted to, but I choose you. And that is the freedom of the love that I was starting to experience in seeing people. And because I think I had been able to take off a layer of, again, protection. And instead of being so internalized, I was starting to see people and seeing their hearts and seeing their beauty and their essence coming through in a way that I was like, wow. Like, I love people, and I don't know if it's a sexual attraction or this attraction, but I'm just seeing people. And that was, like, such a beautiful revelation, too.

Did that start happening after you were married?

Yeah, and I always have loved people, but I've been a little, like, I can be magnetic and, you know, be almost, like, a little intoxicating to, like, be around because I can perform and be the thing and people feel comfortable and they, you know, they come alive, too. So I've always loved people, but I haven't just been, like, still and, like, allowed them to just be seen and then just see their essence and their beauty, you know, like, it wasn't just like an exchange of fun energy.

And it started when you were seeing yourself.

Yeah, exactly.

Yeah.

And so, yeah, because we all are reflections of each other. And so the more I was starting to connect to, really, the 20, it was around 28, 29 year old in me, I was able to start seeing other people that way, too. And not just as, like, their personalities, but as their souls. And so as that started unraveling I had all these, like, activations start happening and I was starting to have these beautiful oneness experiences with people where I would just be sitting there having a conversation and I'd be like, thinking of a black and white dog and the number twelve would come up and I'd be like, did you have a dog that was black and white at twelve? And then be like, wait, what? Like, how did you know that? And I was like, I don't know. It just popped up into my head and I just wanted to ask. And so these little, like, and then they would go on to share this really beautiful story about how this was a woman named Claudia and she lived in Germany and she talked about how at twelve years old she had this dog and they ended up moving from that farm and they had to leave the dog and it like, broke her heart.

And I was like, cool.

I don't know where that came from.

But it opened that conversation. And she's like, I haven't thought about that in years. And so little things like that would start popping up or I would start seeing colors around people. And at first I was like, what's happening to me? All this stuff is a little freaking me out. But then I was like, just get curious about it, you know, don't think too hard about it. But it was all during that time. So I was going on this, like, wild journey of, I'm curious about this. I want to go take, you know, a tai chi lesson and a qigong lesson. And I want to, like, understand all these different modalities of ways to connect to yourself more and be able to trust yourself more. And so as I was going through that, I was expanding and de layering all of these things. And my ex was contracting because he had just got let go from playing hockey and he was going through, like, identity, like, shift and what's next and all sorts of things. And so it was an expansion for me and a contraction for him. And we weren't understanding each other. And I don't think we had the maturity to come together.

We were very much, like, going like this and kind of doing our own thing. And, you know, we've had this conversation now that we wish we would have had the maturity to come together and that there would have been, you know, potentially a different outcome. But I think everything has happened the way that it should have happened and the growth and the learning and the evolution has been, yeah, what it needed to be. And I'm grateful for it. I'm not asking for it again, but I've definitely been grateful for it.

If you've had the conversation now of like, oh, if we could have come together kind of a thing or grew together, do you think that's still possible? Like, have you guys thought about.

No, it's not possible.

Not possible. It's fascinating that the safety and the space you felt like the safety in that father figure ish situation that allowed you to start healing the little girl in you and then grow into you talk about all the things that started happening and the things you started trying and the person you started becoming. It's almost as if you grew up in a way, as you mentioned, into a woman inside that relationship and that it just didn't grow with you.

Yeah, the container was definitely created for that to happen, and I'm beyond grateful. And we are, you know, very important, special people in each other's lives. And we shared a really powerful season together. And I'm not going to speak for him because he can obviously speak for himself, but I know that I also brought a lot of things to his life that he has shared with me also. And so it has definitely felt like a mutual just respect and love and period of growth for both of us.

And, yeah, I've never heard you talk about your marriage or divorce with these things before.

I never have. With that period and chapter of my life, it was so sacred to me of what happened. And I started going more inward and realizing, like, I understand and I feel seen by myself, and I know, so I don't need it from everybody else. I still want people to know that are in my circle. But because I think as a human, we just want to be known. I think that makes us feel loved to be known, that all of us can be known and not be rejected. You know, all parts of us can exist. And so, yeah, so I think that I just really wanted to protect that space because it was really, really beautiful.

So many people are in relationships of all kinds, whether they're friendships or romantic partnerships or marriages or where they feel like, I love this person. And also, we're growing either in totally different directions or in totally different, at totally different paces.

There is so much more coming up in this episode. You are not going to want to miss it. But first, I wanted to share this with you. In life, you don't soar to the level of your hopes and dreams. You stay stuck at the level of your self worth. When you build your self worth, you change your entire life. And that's exactly why I wrote my new book, worthy how to believe you are enough and transform your life for you. If you have some self doubt to destroy and a destiny to fulfill, worthy is for you. In worthy, you'll learn proven tools and simple steps that bring life changing results, like how to get unstuck from the things holding you back, build unshakable self love, unlearn the lies that lead to self doubt and embrace the truths of that wake up worthiness, overcome limiting beliefs and imposter syndrome. Achieve your hopes and dreams by believing you are worthy of them and so much more. Are you ready to unleash your greatness and step into the person you were born to be? Imagine a life with zero self doubt and unshakable self worth. Get your copy of Worthy plus some amazing thank you bonus gifts for you@worthybook.com. or the link in the show notes below.

Imagine what you'd do if you fully believed in you. It's time to find out with worthy. Imagine what would you do if you fully believed in you. My weekly free inspirational newsletter is packed with tips and tools to help you find out. It's called one on one with Jamie, and it's delivered right to your inbox each Tuesday morning. It's a love letter from me to you, from my soul to yours, and I hope it brings you the words and messages you need at just the right moment. Plus, when you're a part of my free inspirational newsletter community, you'll be the first to get behind the scenes content, inspirational messages, and be the first to learn about upcoming events and more. It's the place to be, and I sure hope you'll join me there. So if you're not on the list yet, you can sign up for free@jamiecurnlima.com or click the link in the show notes below. And here's to becoming unstoppable together. And now more of this conversation together.

So many people are in relationships of all kinds, whether they're friendships or, you know, romantic partnerships or marriages or where they feel like, I love this person. And also, we're growing either in totally different directions or in totally different, at totally different paces. And they're struggling because they are scared to leave or they don't want to be alone or they don't want to feel like their expectation they had going into it wasn't met. And how did you have, you know, there's just such through lines in your book and in so many things about learning to trust yourself and step into your power. A lot of people are scared to you. So in the decision to divorce, how did you get there when before it was like, let me make sure I'm safe and protect myself and put people around me to protect me.

I'll give you kind of like an overview of the things and the people and the environments that were put into place to protect myself, and then that will show the unraveling. So I also had an assistant of eight years who we met when I was 23. She was 23, I was 24. And we grew together, but we became very codependent. And there was an enmeshment in our relationship. She cared so much, and she, you know, she. She cared not just about me, but she cared about the work and doing great things. But we really had a dependency on each other. And then I got married, and I also had two dogs that were my kids. I mean, I had them for eleven years and for eight years, and they were everything to me. So that was another, you know, sense of safety that I had. My brother and Haley, they also lived with my ex husband and I in our house for, like, three years. I also started a company that was kinergy. And it was all just this beautiful, pure intention of, like, you know, helping people connect to themselves and heal. And so all these things were, like, in my orbit.

And as this little girl was dropping more into the woman and going on that journey, all these things started unraveling. I mean, my relationship with my old assistant, the unhealthiness started showing up of, we're codependent on each other, and this is either going to continue on and this is going to become even more unhealthy, and this is going to blow up in a way that might hurt our friendship. So I think we need to maybe take a break or work on this or something, or stop working together so that we can be friends as, like, an option. And at the time, again, maturity, I think we didn't have maybe the tools or the communication in order to work through it. And so we decided to part ways. So that was the first part of the unraveling. And that was a relationship that was eight years with someone. And, I mean, she was everything. I mean, she was my best friend and she still is, but we decided to part ways, and that was a breakup. And it was really, really hard. And it had already been two years since my ex and I had been going through this different time of our lives and moving away from each other.

And so there was also a long time of questioning, is this working? Is this not working? We're going in different directions. And so I had asked for a separation. And with the intent to work through asked for separation, and then ten days later, my dogs were killed by coyotes. Yeah. Wow. I am so emotional today. So that happened. And it was right at the time I was getting ready to launch kinergy.

On tour with Oprah, and I felt so out of integrity or out of, like, alignment that I'm about to start this company, which is all about helping people connect to themselves and living their most expanded, free self. And I've just got, you know, my assistant and I are breaking up. My ex, and I.

Well, my husband at the time, I'm asking for a separation because something's not working.

My dogs that represented unconditional love and safety, gone. I'm like, what am I doing? I'm blowing up my life.

And I.

Have to go and perform on stage, which is like, the, you know, the whole purpose is to help people, like, connect to themselves. And I'm feeling very disconnected right now after all these, like, painful things are unraveling, even though they were the things.

That were not in alignment as I.

Was shifting in a new direction.

And so what I realized is, like, with change is loss, and, like, going through any kind of loss is painful, even if it is the right thing. And so as that was happening, I was just, like, experiencing pain out of a decision that I felt like was the right thing for me. And also they were experiencing pain. And so that was just. Yeah, it was really like a mind f. Like, what's happening here.

Well, and all of this loss all around you, all this unraveling, decided, I want to go through with it. Because you decided to trust yourself that it was right for you, even in the midst of everything else.

Yes. And I still was like, I have this knowing. I know. And as I had never felt more clear about, I cannot abandon myself in this moment. Like, I have to stay true to myself. And this is the first time I've ever done that. And so I kept on the journey. I started Kinergy, and we went on tour with Oprah, and then the pandemic happened. And then with that journey, there was so much unraveling of a lot of our guides that we had trained because it's a self discovery platform, and we all went through training. And so all of us were going through this big transformation because it had activated also them. And then the pandemic happened, and everyone's feeling uncertain. And so there was a lot of weight and responsibility that I felt for all of our employees and the company while I'm feeling so disconnected. And, I mean, there were decisions. I was just trying to survive at this point, because I was like, hang on, what's happening? I'm supposed to be this most expansive version of myself. I just started having all this beautiful, like, divine grace and knowing and connection, and I'm experiencing the opposite right now.

And so all of this is happening. And my tightest group of friends that were within my orbit also didn't show up for me the way that I needed it. And again, that's in my experience, and I can see that now, but definitely did not show up for me in the way that I needed it. So all the friends in the group that I had, that was very small, their actions and their behaviors were really painful and hurtful as well. And so the friend group. So all of this is to say, self, others, world is a big philosophy that I have, which is like, you connect to yourself, and when you do that, you can relate to others. And when you can relate to others, you can experience the world. Well, it also goes the opposite way. So as I was unraveling all of my stuff now, the people around me were also starting to unravel. And this third layer, which is your career and the things that you put out into the world, all of that is starting to unravel now. And so I always look at it as in, like, spirals. It's like you do the same lesson in the same pattern, and you go around and round, and the lesson gets shorter every time you experience it until you get to the, like, ooh, that's the core of that one.

And I feel that. And now I'm sitting here for a minute, letting it, like, process and integrate, and then you can come back out, and then you can serve that way. But you have to kind of go inward and de layer all of those things in order to, like, sit and now create. And so that's what was. I've been in the sitting place for the last few years, which is, by the way, book two. I like to call it the death hole bit of shit era, because all of the things that were in my life came apart and out of a choice that was choosing me in my most honest and true way, even though it was painful for me and it was painful for the people and the things around me. And those was a lot of loss, a lot of grief, and experiencing, a lot of abandonment and betrayal and things that are very charged words to use. But I also had to own that that was my experience and how I was feeling. And that's the fire lesson that she goes through, that she feels this anger and this visceralness. And she has to experience it.

She has to feel it. Otherwise, it's just this burning thing that's happening and what's underneath that is really just hurt. And if you never get to it, then it's just gonna sit there in your body and you're gonna get sick and all sorts of things. So I say that with a laugh, but I mean it, you know, like, those things manifest that way. And so as all of that was unraveling, now I'm, you know, in this stillness space. And I was like, okay, this is not easy, but I'm going to intentionally create my life now instead of do the thing that I think I'm supposed to do and fall into it and realize, did I even choose any of this? And so that's been the last few years. And all the while that was happening, I wrote this book, which was like, the expansion part, the activation of her gifts that she's experiencing, the trust that she's starting to feel. And while I was writing the book, I was going through all of that, that loss at the time. So that's why it took me four and a half years, because I was like, again, I feel out of alignment and integrity with writing this because I feel different than when I did when this happened.

And so it was hard to go back and forth because I was actually quite angry at the expansion that I had because I associate it with so much pain. And I remember having this, like, absolute knowing of, like, divine, you know, God and grace and, like, feeling, like, so protected and so held. And I was like, this is. This is the opposite of what I was supposed to feel. Supposed to, you know, I'm feeling so much pain. And from that point, I just surrendered to it. I was like, I am a survivor. I know I'm going to be okay. I'm going to be better than okay. I felt what it's going to be like on the other side before all of this happened. And I need to trust. I need to trust. So I would just, day by day, just wake up. And was very intentional about not getting into another relationship. Was very intentional about what's the work that I want to do, being very intentional about the friendships and the family and the healing that I wanted to invest in. And that was very, very intentional because I didn't want to. I don't want to repeat.

I don't want to repeat patterns. I don't want to act from my five year old, my four year old self, my ten year old self, my 15 year old self, or even my 25 year old self. You know, like, I want to act from the woman who has gone through everything that I've gone through and is acting from this place in this chair right now.

You know, you shared so many layers of unraveling, and I think one of the things that you shared that I think is just so important is that it's not easy. Like, sometimes we can hear someone say, I decided to trust myself. And also doing that can come with a lot of change. And you share, even friends shifting a lot of people, when they start to grow their friends or their family's, like.

You'Re changing as if it's a bad thing.

Right. And a lot of people have no interest in evolving or changing. And so a lot of people kind of retreat, and then they go back to just like, well, because as you mentioned earlier, we all need love and belonging and all the things, and so.

Then they retreat and connection.

And I just want to call that out, that your journey of trusting yourself and knowing that this and trusting you're knowing and going through it, which I.

Know you know a lot about.

About knowing.

Yeah, it's just like, oh, my gosh. But it's hard to trust our knowing when maybe doing that comes with, you know, change or loss or grief or hard times. You've shared also a lot about the last four years, in particular, about going through a lot of emotions, anxiety, depression, all of it. How did that factor in. Into this unraveling that you've been experiencing?

Well, you know, whether it's the ingrained religious system that I was built in or the competitive one, or everything's fine, I'm going to keep moving forward mentality that I created myself, whatever that is, you know, like, I never wanted to allow myself to feel those things because if I feel those things again, like something's wrong with me or like, I don't want to be stuck there. Like, there's no way that I want to be stuck in this feeling. Like, you just always got to move forward. Always got to move forward. And so allowing myself to be human and actually experience those true feelings didn't mean that I needed to be stuck there forever. In fact, by actually acknowledging that I was feeling that and allowing myself to feel that, I got out of that quicker than trying to not experience that, trying to avoid ever feeling depressed or anxious. Now that I've opened it up, I look at it this way like I was living in a box like this where everything is good, everything is positive. But as you expand, you also expand this way, too. So the more you're going to experience the good, you're also going to experience the gamut and the pendulum swing of what's within.

So if I wanted to just live in this tight little box, fine. And a lot of people choose to stay in the box because it's safe and it's contained. But I want to experience the gamut of life. I want to be able to have empathy for myself and for the people that are experiencing these things. And because I allowed myself to experience what it truly felt like to not want to get out of bed, I understood my sister. I can understand people when they're going through things from a visceral. I know. I get that. I've experienced that, too. Not just having compassion for someone who has gone through something, and that's a beautiful thing, too, to have compassion for people if you've not gone through something similar, but to have that experience and that knowing, I believe, again, not that you should be trauma bonding with people, but it definitely, you are known. And I want other people to feel known when I'm speaking to them, too, that I get you. I see you, and I feel you, and I've been there, too, and we're gonna be okay.

In this show, we talk about a lot of things, and I'm always such a proponent of what a gift if you have the privilege to seek therapy or healing modalities. And so in your journey, you know, especially, like, the unraveling, that is a lot. And I know there's more as well.

There's more.

I know there's more, there's more.

But, like, it's a lot.

And I want to actually, I want.

To make sure we don't miss a couple of things that you said, because I just know how powerful they are to people listening, who are going to connect with them with your friendships and with going through the unraveling. And were the friendships that weren't there for you, were they friends that knew you as.

Yes. In fact, they were a mirror of who I was back then, and we had very similar ways of living in the world. And I was so, wow, like, this is going to be really hard because. And so I tried, actually very hard to hold on to those friendships. And during the divorce, I then questioned myself. Oh, no. Not only did I lose, you know, not lose, but not only did I just, you know, break up our marriage and something that was beautiful, now I'm questioning, did I ruin. Not just that, but my friendships and my life and the like. Now I'm starting to doubt myself you know, and, like, what did I do? Because everything that I ever knew was being completely, I guess, and again, charged words, but threatened. And I was like, I've made a mistake. I've made a mistake trying to hold on to these friendships, trying to hold on to these things that, like, the minute I let go and I said, they need to be on their own journey. They don't understand mine right now. And that's okay. That's okay. I wish it were different. I really wish it were different.

And I wish that they could have been there, but they couldn't at the time. So I need to let go and nothing. Desperately hope that they will get this and try to explain why they're not understanding. The minute I let go, I was able to come back to the fact that, oh, no, I did make the right decision, or the right decision for me. And as that started happening, you know, some of those friendships have gone on different journeys and different paths now. Some of them have stayed the same. Some of us have come back together. Some of us have not. But the lesson in that was they don't know. They don't understand. And I can't make them understand or make them be there for me. That has to be their decision. And as painful as that is, you know, like anything else, they are external, and things fall apart and fall away. I have to be okay knowing that I am not just safe and loved for myself, but also I can go and now meet people and be intentional about pouring love and energy into friendships that are a mutual exchange and a mutual respect and a mutual building of a foundation of where we both are today.

And not to say that we might not have stuff later on, but the way that we built our friendship in these later, you know, relationships. And by the way, I've reconnected with some childhood friends that have been incredible, realizing that this tight circle here, there was a whole circle around them that I didn't really invest time and energy in because, you know, I had this tight one. But actually, a lot of this outer circle, they've been incredible. And I've gotten to know them, not just where I felt safe in this. And again, that's the outpouring of this was the system of protection for me. And now that I feel safe, I can now have discernment and trust in other people, too.

And this unraveling journey.

Yeah.

Do you feel like it's concluded? Do you feel like it's still going?

Remember how I said there's a downward spiral and then an upward spiral? I think that's consistent our whole lives of continuing to, you know, unravel and change. But I think that the end transform. And I think that, like you, a lot of these things are, you know, the crucible of, you know, you can either self destruct and, like, it will destroy you or you will transform. And I believe that we transform many times in our lives. I think that this specific transformation that I went through was, you know, 30 years worth. So I'm hoping now that whatever next transformation isn't in another 30 years, but that it is, it's constant and that the spiral is quicker, you know, and it's not suppressing for another 30 years.

If you love today's episode, too, my only ask is that you click the follow or subscribe button for the show on your app and give it a rating or review, and then share this episode with everyone you believe in. Share it with another person in your life who could benefit from it, post it, and share it with others online or in your community who just might need the words and tools and lessons in this episode today. You never know whose life you're meant to change today by sharing this episode. And thank you so much for joining me today. And before you go, I want to share some words with you that couldn't be more true. You, right now, exactly as you are, are enough and fully worthy. You're worthy of your greatest hopes, your wildest dreams, and all the unconditional love in the world. And it's an honor to welcome you to each and every episode of the Jamie Kern Lima show here. I hope you'll come as you are and heal where you need. Blossom what you choose, journey toward your calling and stay as long as you like because you belong here. You are worthy.

You are loved. You are love. I love you. And I can't wait to join you on the next episode of the Jamie Kern Lima show. Coming up. You are not going to want to miss part three, the final part of this incredible conversation and episode with Julianne Hough.

They're shedding all the things, unraveling all the things, and taking your power back.

Yeah, it's pretty crazy.

And trusting yourself.

Yeah. And now I'm like, wow, I really.

Have such a clean slate. Be careful what you ask for. Cause I did in 2019, I said, I just, I feel like I need a clean slate.

And I got it.

75% of women deal with imposter syndrome. They look around and they make decisions by consensus instead of like, maybe I actually know the answer inside. And we do. Have you ever talked about that? And shared this.

I have nothing. I'm sitting here being like, wow, I don't have my dogs here. Don't have a partner, don't have cash, don't have a credit card, don't know these people. And I'm like, I've never felt more stable. I've never felt more secure, never felt more consistent. I've never felt more loved, and I've never felt more loved by the people around me that I do right now.

Pretty cool.

It speaks to how whole you are that you can sit at a wedding with your ex husband and his girlfriend.

And be like, it's so beautiful.

It really was.

That's power.

That is power.

I woke up before my phone even rang, and I knew, and I picked up the phone, and my. My assistant at the time was just, like, screaming. I've never had coyotes in my yard. I have gates and everything. And that they went together. One, I'm so grateful they went together. Two, I'm grateful that usually how it happens is very quick and that we got their bodies. But at that time, I was like, oh. That was, like, the unraveling of, like, the absolute safety of, like, unconditional love.

And I know I'm ready to, like, open my heart and experience what this means.

On this energy retreat, we talked about soul fragmentation, when something really tragic happens.

And a piece of your soul gets fragmented, and it goes with whatever happened.

And so, for sure, I felt my soul fragmented and that they were still with my girls. And so I did, like, a retrieval of bringing my soul back and also giving their piece of them back to them, too, because I realized, oh, I'm holding them back also. Like, they need to be able to move forward and move on. There was a piece of me that never felt whole in the last few years, and when I did that, I felt very whole after that. And when that happened, I went home and I wrote a song for the book.

You wrote it in a way, though, where everyone's going to go on their own hero's journey through it.

Right.

I'll ask myself questions, and the answers will just come up so quickly, because the wisdom of earth, the wisdom of yourself in being grounded, we all have.

All the elements, earth, air, water, fire. And you mentioned your quiz.

I took it, and I did. I did.

Earth was my dominant one.

I also want to point out, Oprah is very earth.

Yeah. And what you're saying now, too, is, like, you're wanting more earth.

Yes.

Right. So it's interesting how energetically people can just kind of connect or kind of see, how often do you have supernatural experiences?

Have you ever seen, seen something happening?

I like stood up and my heart opened and my hands literally went behind me like this. And I was like, whoa, I feel so loved. This is God, you know? And so as that happened, I just, my heart started opening. Little God winks, little gifts pop into your life. You're able to receive them and have that trust and that knowing that there is a, there is a design and the plan at hand. And when you're open to receiving and trusting and trusting in yourself, trusting in whatever you want to trust in, that it's working for you.

The Emmy award winning, two time dancing with the stars champion and now host of the show, award winning actress, performer, singer, songwriter, producer, entrepreneur and author of the brand new book everything we never knew, Julianne Hough, welcome to the Jamie Kern Lima show. Do you struggle with negative self talk? Living with a constant mental narrative that you're not good enough is exhausting. I know because I spent most of my life in that habit. The words you say to yourself, about yourself are so powerful. And when you learn to take control over your self talk, it's life changing. And I wanted to give you a free resource that I created for you if this is something that could benefit your life. It's called five ways to overcome negative self talk and build self love. And it's a free how to guide to overcome that negative self talk to build confidence and develop unshakable self love so that you can dream big and keep going in the pursuit of your goals. Don't let self sabotaging thoughts hinder your progress any longer. It's time to rewrite the script of your life, one filled with self love, resilience and unwavering belief.

If you're ready to take charge of your narrative, build unwavering confidence and empower yourself to persevere on the path to your dreams. You can grab your free guide to stop overthinking and learn to trust yourself@jamiekernlima.com. resources or click the link in the show notes below. Who you spend time around is so important, as energy is contagious, and so is self belief, and I'd love to hang out with you even more, especially if you could use an extra dose of inspiration. Which is exactly why I've created my free weekly newsletter that's also a love letter to you, delivered straight to your inbox from me. If you haven't signed up to make sure that you get it each week, just go to jamiecarlima.com to make sure you're on the list and you'll get your one on one with Jamie Weekly newsletter and get ready to believe in you. If you're tired of hearing the bad news every single day and need some inspiration, some tips, tools, joy and love hitting your inbox. I'm your girl. Subscribe@jamiekarnlima.com or in the link in the show notes I am so excited for this book.

You know why?

Because it's going to save so many people. Were the your new beautiful book worthy?

Get this book.

This book. I'm telling you, it's a book that can change anybody's life. Who picks it up. Anybody who's ever felt that they were not good enough didn't measure up. Something's missing in your life, I can tell you. It's powerful. It's happening.

It's worthy.

Imagine what would you do do if you fully believed in you. I went from struggling waitress facing nonstop rejection to founder of it Cosmetics, a billion dollar company, by learning how to overcome self doubt and believe I am worthy of my hopes and dreams. And I'm sharing how you can, too, in my new book, worthy, how to believe you are enough and transform your life. If you're ready to truly trust yourself and break through that barrier of self doubt and know that where you come from or even where you are right now, doesn't determine where you're going, then worthy is for you. It's time to go from doubting you're enough to knowing you're enough. It's time to step into all of who you are and into the person you were born to be. And it's time to believe that you are worthy of it. Because in life, we don't become what we want. We become what we believe we're worthy of. Join the Worthy movement today by grabbing your copy of Worthy anywhere books are sold. Then head to worthybook.com now for free gifts, including my five part course on becoming unstoppable and my 95 page worthy workbook action plan that teaches you how to implement the tools from the book into your real life right now.

Worthy is groundbreaking.

Yo, worthy.

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This book is going to change lives.

This book literally will teach you how.

To actually feel worthy so that you can have the strength, you can have the confidence.

The lessons in this book and the strategies will change your life. You will never be the same again after you read this book.

Jamie's book Worthy is a must read. It is going to inspire you, empower you, give you the hope that you need and the kick in the rear end that you deserve.

Jamie's book worthy is incredible. The gifts are going away, but they're all free right now on worthybook.com. it's such an honor to share this podcast together with you. And please note, I'm not a licensed therapist, and this podcast is nothing intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional. If this episode impacted you and you want more, click here.