You're crazy.

What's going on, everybody? Welcome back to another exhilarating episode of the Vile Files Reality Recap Edition. I'm your host, Nik.

Oh, dear God.

He's back.

Lake Nik is back. You might know him as Nik. We had a It was a victorious weekend, if you must know. It was my father's birthday on Sunday. Being the good son that I am and the good daughter-in-law that now he is, we took my father to the packer game.

How was that?

It was lovely. They won in victorious fashion. I saw that. With their backup quarterback. Justin. Shout out to Malik Willis. Justin. He's keeping up. Redeeming himself for sure. He is. I think you guys went Owen, too.

No, we did not. We picked the bears. Did the bears win? The bears lost.

I believe you picked the ravens who also lost to the Raiders, which wasn't upset. I also lost. I picked the ravens, but I did win against the Texans. So I went 101, you went Owen, too. Sorry, household. Listen, it'll happen. It's a long season. I mean, that's the beauty of the NFL, but it's okay. Yeah, listen, it happens. The Ravens should have won, but in upsetting fashion, the Raiders of Las Vegas triumph. It did.

Yeah.

Bomer. They finally understand sports.

The game was so fun. We were sitting in absolute-Gorgeous seats.

Thank you to the Green Bay packers who allowed us the opportunity to purchase, which is a gift. Those are hard tickets to come by.

Yeah, absolutely. But I was going to say we were sitting beside in our gorgeous seats, also in the heat. It was direct sunlight, and boy, was it hot.

Second hottest day in Lambo field history.

How hot was it?

Well, it was like 88 to degrees. But in a stadium with the sun being down, it holds on to heat. So a lot of times, I'm guessing you could probably Google this, Zack, there's an on field temperature, which is usually several degrees hotter than the outside weather or heat or temperature.

I searched it. I can't find that.

Not available. Oh, my gosh. Anyways, it was a very fun game, and I believe we are Good luck Charms now, and we must go to every game.

We've had the most delicious here at the lake. It has been so warm, so hot, so sunny, so calm. The lake has been glass. It's really just been...

There's been no one else here, so it's literally like we have our own private lake. It's so good. Yeah. Did you all see Gillian? She posted a clip of nick talking about who was it, some actor or something, and you were like, he must have made Gillian's. I was like, Gillian? It was the funniest video I think I've ever seen of myself. I didn't see it. You did? I saw that.

Your reaction to it?

Yes. When you all edit that stuff, are you like... Because it felt like it was zoomed in. I don't know if she did that or if you all did that. She did that. You think?

Yeah. Maybe we should hire her.

Maybe we should. Gillian. Gillian's.

She's got Gillian's.

Anyways, that was funny. Shout out to Gillian. Shout out to Gillian. I just wanted to point that out that that was funny.

It was hilarious.

Thank you. I know. I also really do enjoy call... This is such a transition. I enjoy calling nick Daddy. Whoa, not in that way, but in the way of now that I have a daughter.

I was like, Wait a minute.

What about not the other way?

No. Well, no. God, no. God, no. God, no.

No, no, no, no, no, Daddy.

Then we're like, Daddy. We're calling for you, but it's really just me. It's not her. She can't speak yet, but it feels so like... It does. It's like, Is Daddy going to come home today?

Wait a minute.

You really got to say it perfectly.

Otherwise...

It feels weird. You're right. I don't know. You get what I mean, though, don't you? I feel like mothers out there who have their baby daddies involved, and they're like, You There's something nice and sweet and cute about being like, I'm not going to give another example because I'll probably fuck that up, too.

I do love being a dad.

That's great, honey. Yeah.

She's making a little noise right now.

She said, Hello, I like my parents, too.

Do you call Natalie mommy to River? Yeah.

Let's go find mommy. Mom, let's go find mom, mama, mama. I say mama more than mommy because I feel like I'm trying to get her to say mama. I'm coaching her up.

Her mama. Big mama. Big mama.

I love that movie.

Has anyone watched Perfect Couple?

Yes, I just finished it this weekend.

Has anyone watched Chimp Crazy?

I had to stop after I saw a scalp on the ground. Yeah, that was a little much for me.

I'll come back to it. It is hardcore. Nelly has been putting it on as the-I'm finished with it, actually. You finish it? Yeah.

Without you.

Okay. I was going to say she's been putting it on as a late night snack, if you will. I've been...

Couldn't have been sleeping harder through Chimp Crazy. Even through all the-How? Screaching and banging that the chimpanzees do, nick is just like, La-di-la-di.

So wait, did she give you that? Yeah.

Spoiler alert. You can't. You're going to give that. That's a huge thing to say. I feel like we should believe that. It's been out for a while. It has been out for a while, but I don't think a lot of people are on the train. Don't you feel like everyone was obsessed with Tiger King? That was a worldwide massive fucking show. I honestly feel like I was the first person to watch it.

We were also locked in for COVID, so I think we didn't have a choice.

That's true.

But it was a phenomenon.

It literally came out right in the beginning of COVID.

People were like, I can go to the grocery store I don't need to watch Tim crazy.

I honestly was on Netflix when it came out and I was like, Tiger King, what's this? It was late at night, and I just pressed play, and I felt like I was the first person to binge it. Also, do you remember Don't Fuck with cats? Yes.

That was wild. That one made me scared to post anything on Instagram because I was like, they can find anything from a street corner.

Oh my God. Truly. Wow, that is crazy.

Who else had a crazy weekend?

I heard Justin was digging through trash.

I was digging through trash. So there's this thing that happens. I don't know if you guys know about it, but Cierra is from Palos Verdes. Is that how you pronounce it?

Palos Verde, yes.

And Friday, I saw this video go viral where it's like, twice a year on Palos Verde. They have a citywide trash day. And all of the rich people, which to my knowledge, Palos Verdes is like a bel air of the South Bay or whatever you want to call it. And they put all of their furniture or stuff that they don't want, like rugs, mirrors, bikes, chairs, tables, like anything you could think of. Just throw it on the side of the curb. And it's like people drive to Pals Verde's and drive around from 5:00 PM to midnight just digging through trash. You'll see cars on cars filled with trucks or truck beds. What are they called? The back of a car?

It's less trash. It's more like a highly organized- Thrifting. Rum and sail.

Kind of, yeah.

That's just open.

But some of it is trash. You'll be next to one mansion, and they have gorgeous Victorian furniture on their curb, and then the next mansion will have literal trash bags of dirt that you could grab.

Do you think that maybe it's trash day? And so some houses are actually putting their cans out. They take it seriously.

There's that. It's like a bulk removal day. So it's like anything that you have that's oversized. They clear it out. So people go and run it and find. I have fun.

I was digging through trash. Did you get anything?

Honestly, no. I grabbed a toilet paper holder, which is random, but it was a nice one. And I was like, You know what? I don't have one. I'll grab a momentum. And it was that. Momento.

To remember Remember the trash digging days?

There was some good stuff, though. You would see people driving around with full on armoires or what is the things that heat up the patios? A heat lamp? Heat lamps. There was gorgeous. Really? People were just throwing away and you could just grab it.

How do you know if it's broken or not? You don't. Imagine you're like, I'm getting all the heat lamps, and you take them all home and none of them work.

But pretty good. Pretty fun.

I watched TV this weekend. Perfect. I didn't even brunch. I was like, Oh, I thought you asked for exciting things done this weekend.

Not me. Wait, you watched the VMAs, though.

I did watch the VMAs.

What about the others? Did anything crazy happen?

I actually really enjoyed it. I think that was pretty crazy. It's the first award show in a long time that I was like, Oh, my God, excited about the musical performances, excited about the appearances. My boyfriend enlightened me that the reason why I was so excited about it was because there's also 2003 drama, like Britney Spears and Christina and Justin. It was like the Sabrina and Camilla and Sean Mendes. It's like, they're all here. There was so much drama. I was living for it. Were they going for drama?

Were they heading each other?

Honey. Well, Sabrina's got a song about Sean and a song about Kamilla. Sorry. He's going to kill me. The Queen. Then Camilla has a song about Sean and Sabrina.

I will say Camilla, the three of them sing a song, but Camilla, she sing about growth.

They all sing about her break. She opened up with her song about Sean, and then...

She sing five seconds about Sean, and then she moved on after that. I was like, okay.

Do we know know that it absolutely is about them, or are we as fans-Speulating. Assuming and speculating?

I mean, she hasn't come out and been like, This is about Camilla, but it is very obvious.

It's like the Olivia Rodrigo, Sabrina Carpenter. It's just The songs very clearly are talked. She says, Every time you kiss him, you'll be tasting me, or something like that.

Oh my God.

Who wrote that?

Sabrina. Sabrina. I will say we do know what this drama that this Camilla album was about Sean because Sean never liked the ocean when they were together. Then Camilla is like, Okay, the second we broke up, I'm writing an album about Miami and the ocean.

What do you mean Sean didn't like the ocean?

She would always say, Let's go to the ocean. Let's go swim. He was like, No, I don't like that. But then the second they broke up, he went to the ocean. He was at the beach all the time. Now, his album is about being from the Earth and the nature and the forest.

I just feel like just because Sean didn't want to, at one particular day, go running into the beach, doesn't mean he hates the ocean. He was with Kajela for a while. One day, he was like, I don't know, maybe I don't want to fuck with sand, and maybe it was a little cold out. In one of those mornings, not speaking from experience, because Nelly would never do this, but sometimes when you're dating someone for no reason whatsoever, they're like, Let's do something fun today. I don't even know what. Nelly would never. Then maybe it was something like that. Then she was like, I don't know, let's just go run in the ocean. It was like 55 degrees out and it was freezing and you didn't want to go. Then now all of a sudden, he's just like, he hates the ocean. He was like, Just one day. He didn't want to go.

Well, he's in his hillbilly era.

Yeah, he's in his man of the woods.

No, I mean, you just absolutely came from my throat on that one, so I will be sitting quiet.

I literally said, You've never done this.

But we all know that I have.

The way she was looking at you, I was scared.

You just told a story on Ask nick where you were like, Natalie's like, Let's get the Halloween decor.

That wasn't fun.

Exactly. It's never fun for the other person. It's always fun for the person asking to do it. I love you so much. It's me being like, Let's paint the bedroom today.

I had a dream last night. It's a recurring dream that Natalie will go with me, and I cried.

In your sleep?

But he never wakes me up and like, Honey, I'm crying. I would love to see the tears, but he never... He's just always like, Yeah, I cried last night. I'm like, Okay. I'd love to be like, I'll never leave you. I'd love to have that moment.

I guess I'll I'll try to work through my trauma in the middle of the night and wake you up.

Natalie, let's be honest, though. If you're sleeping sound and he wakes you up saying, I had a dream you woke up with me and I'm crying, are you happy about this?

She's like, You, ick.

Shut the fuck up. Go back to me.

I feel like he has He's done it before where he's been tossing and turning it. I'm like, What's wrong? Are you okay? And he's like, No. I'm like, Oh, just come there and let's snuggle because I love you and I'll never leave you.

And that's how you change the conversation.

Well, also on the VMA's red carpet, we were talking about this earlier. So did you see the video of Chapel Roon basically telling paparazzi to shut the fuck up.

I did. I feel like she's really been popping off lately.

She has. I love it. Yeah. I mean, she's been really popular. In this context, the video is her on the red carpet, and you hear a paparazzi say, Shut the fuck up. I'm sorry. You hear the paparazzi say, Shut the F up, and then you hear Chapel respond going, You shut the F up, not me.

You're not cussing now? What's going on, Justin?

We're trying to... The moms of the listeners are saying we shouldn't cuss.

But then what? Now people are saying that...

Your moms are listening, and they're saying you'll cuss too much?

The moms of our listeners.

Really? They're saying it's too much cussing.

There's too much f-bombs. There's too much f-bombs?

I'm trying to censor myself. There's too much F-words? Really?

The moms?

Yeah.

They're saying they can't listen around their kids because we're saying too many F-bombs.

Okay. Well, Chappal She's dropping the F-bombs on the red carpet.

So are we. Well, we're dropping the F-bombs completely.

We're dropping F-bombs about dropping F-bombs.

We're not saying F anymore?

Let's try not to. This whole episode. Hold us accountable.

I think she's still okay.

I don't know about that one. Shit. S-word. Anyways, so people are getting mad at her because obviously we know she's fresh in the entertainment or the mainstream, like popularity of the entertainment industry. So people are like, Oh, she's overreacting by saying F-u to the paparazzi that are giving her the Fame, versus some people are like, She's respecting herself enough to be like, This is me. Don't talk to me this way, even though I am a celebrity. It's this whole online debate right now.

Were they telling her to shut the F up or were they telling everyone around them?

Apparently not. Yeah, apparently she just heard, right? I think some on the internet are speculating that the person who said, Shut the F up, wasn't speaking. Excuse me. Let's rewind. Apparently, it wasn't Chapel who this paparazzi was saying, Shut the F up to. It was someone else, like another paparazzi. They were trying to say...

They get nasty to each other.

I've seen that before. They do. They will yell each other. They don't yell at celebrities, but Chapel, I guess, thought it was for some reason in her moment of being idolized by everyone that a paparazzi would tell her to shut the F up. Is that what she thought?

She was standing on the step and repeat, getting ready for her photos or whatnot, and then all of that happened. I'm like, of course, she's going to think it's directed at her.

Yeah, I was about to say, I probably would think it was also directed at me. If I'm standing in front of all these people and I hear someone say, Shut the F out. I don't know. She's talking to somebody. Was she talking?

Yeah, she's talking to people that were- I believe she also just had a stalker situation, too.

It's like she's at the high end of people just bombarding her and yelling and talking to her.

Apparently, a fan went up to her and kissed her on the mouth.

Oh, my God.

Yeah, where I'm just like, there's There's boundaries, and then it's just in what world? Somebody just like, Oh, I love you so much, and kissed her, and then stalked her father, I believe. It's crazy. Yeah. They're getting a little wild. I think she's completely warranted in being hands-off, back off.

I wonder if people are going to listen to her or if they're just going to continue to disrespect. No. Yeah, right? I know.

They don't. I mean, her life's a little hectic right now. God forbid, she reacts in a way that she might to say, Oops, sorry, I didn't realize that you weren't talking about me.

Also, respect. She's speaking for the paparazzi's. If the paparazzi was telling someone else to shut the F up, she's saying peace.

She's also...

Peace for everybody. She's doing it wrong, for sure. Absolutely. She's a queen.

On the other side of the VMAs, I don't know if you saw, but Katie Perry performed, and Jack Antonoff was wearing earbud in his ears during the performance. People clocked that, and they basically on the internet started saying, Oh, he's shading Katie Perry. He's saying he doesn't like her music by wearing earbud and tuning out her music. He responded. He released a public apology, which I respect the way he did it. And he said, I would like to tell you directly from me that I did, in fact, use earplugs the other night. They were Blue Hero's brand, and I'm mortified to admit that I've been using them for a long time as well as buying them in bulk. I do not only use them in 100 plus DB environments, it's humiliating to admit that I use them on planes, around construction, and every night while sleeping. There's nothing left to do but apologize and thank those who have covered this story because although I'm an embarrassment to family and I, I do believe that this was very important and pressing issue that needed to be exposed. Obviously, this is a joke, but it's like people took it so seriously that he was wearing earplugs that he was like, Y'all, I got to apologize now.

Why is this headlines? Yeah.

Wow. What a great response, I know. Honestly.

I mean, music fans just love a feud. They love to manifest a feud. Now, Cierra, you have some friends who are celebrities. You are tapped in to Hollywood.

She's a celebrity herself.

I'm asking you because I feel you amongst the household would know.

Not you pointing me as an industry plan.Well.

You know more than me. But if you don't know, you don't know. But I think in general, in pop culture, we love a feud. In the reality TV space, we love to also, I think fans love to discuss or speculate on a feud. Absolutely. I think in the reality TV space, I think they may not be always right about said feud, but they're certainly right about a lot of the fact that there are... It's a very petty world. There are a lot of petty fights or feuds going on in reality TV world. My question to you is, does that also happen, or do you know of any musicians or people who are actually feuding, or is it just more fans really speculating, maybe there's a feud 10 years ago, but at the end of the day, these people really aren't dating each other as much as fans like to believe, or is it a little true? And there is a lot of smoke where there is fire, and maybe fans don't have it always right, but there is definitely stuff going on.

I think typically There's always a little where there's smoke, there's fire. There's a little bit of truth to things. But I feel like most of the times, by the time the people that are involved have already moved on is when mainstream picks it up. So it's like they perpetuate a feud that might have been sensitive to them months ago, and then they just go, Okay, I guess I'll monetize off of it because it's not affecting them. I'm like, Sabrina. You know what I mean? Any drama that happens between celebrities, they don't want to make their focus about somebody else.

I mean, it's just like the Selena and Haley. It's like people still saying they hate each other, and there's this massive feud, and they've come out so many times and been like, We're good. We're good.

We're not going to be best friends.

But it seems like celebrities now, like you were saying, or just earlier, Sabrina.

Yeah.

They put it in their music, which takes time to produce and takes time to come out. So by the time the song comes out, without them directly saying it's about this, they are suggestive?

Yeah.

Well, I like- Our podcast, for reality TV stars, what songs are for musicians.

Yeah, maybe. Because I was going to say, if they're real artists that write their own music and whatnot, then I'm always like, I think it's supposed to be a cathartic healing process for them to get out these emotions and make a bop out of it in the process.

But I'm like- Sabrina is a good example, though, because with the driver license Olivia Rodrigo, a few that went on years ago, by the time Olivia released the song, Sabrina and Joshua Bassett were not together. They had already broken up, and it was like, Olivia wrote the song about Sabrina. So Sabrina was like, Well, the Internet hates me now. So it's I'm already over this man, but I might as well make a buck off of it and make an album.

And retaliate. So she wrote a song back. Again, it's a great way to make money, and it gets us involved in exactly what you said, the same way that the parasocial relationships of being involved in other people's drama, we live for it.

I think instead of reality TV stars doing podcasts or writing tell-outs, they should be made to write romance novels with characters and then project their drama into these characters.

Wow, that would take a long time.

Maybe short stories?

Short stories. Well, remember the Housewives used to have blogs?

They did.

That would cause a lot of drama as well because it'd be talking about an episode that was filmed and aird three months ago, and then they would be talking about it as if it was real-time drama.

You have a point, though, because some reality stars don't have podcasts or don't appear on podcasts, but they're friends with the blogs. It's like they have their own form of...

Getting the tea out there. Projecting. Yeah.

Getting out there.

Well, The Trader's won an Emmy. We're two.

Congratulations.

I can't wait for this upcoming season. It's deserved for sure.

Nelly, do you want to have a family conversation right now? Sure. So traders. Some people have been like, Hey, nick, you should do a trader. And honestly, when it comes to reality TV opportunities, It seems like a pretty good time. There's no love.

All right, spit it out. What's going on?

With you being you and my wife, I would be more open to doing it now because you could handle my absence. Yeah, hop off. You'll do traitors. Because before, I was like, I can't leave the show for three weeks. But now that the household's here.

You mean me on the show handling it?

Yes.

Oh, I thought you meant me single-moming it.

She said, Wait a minute.

There's that, too. That's a whole other conversation. Oh, wow. But before you were like, You should do it. Go. And I was like, We just had River. Yeah, pop off. Okay. All right. Anyways. Case closed. Congratulations to traitors. They had an Emy.

Congratulations to traders. Nick will go.

I don't know if I have- Congratulations to Vilefiles. I will be your new host.

I don't know if I'll have the opportunity, but if the opportunity were to present itself, it's interesting to know that it is a little bit more doable this time around. Hell, yeah. I think I'll have to be voted off right away. No. I wouldn't trust me.

I feel like you would either be the traitor or you would be MJed and brought to the final round and then they kick you off. You're the one crying.

I'm not a good one. If I were a traitor, I think they'd catch me pretty good, pretty easily. I think I'd have to be too much trouble.

nick hasn't talked to anybody. It's suspicious.

People are like, No, he's always like that.

But nick would be the one asking all the questions.

You'd be friends with everybody. Yeah, there would need to be someone there who knows you. There'd need to be like, Ben Higgins or someone there.

I think I'll get voted off.

Well, I guess we'll have it that day to watch.

There they wanted an E.

Someone's manifesting. Yeah, for real.

They wanted an E.

I wonder if Max Struce and Jen will be on your season.

Hey, we love a little... That's when projecting goes right. Just putting it out there. Manifesting. Manifesting. Manifesting. Manifesting. For Jen. Can we take a crush for that? So when did this file happen? For those of you who don't know, on the show, on her appearance on the Vial files, we want to apologize to Jason Tatum and LMI. Jen on this broadcast mentioned that she had a crush on Jason Tatum. In real-time, we looked up, Is he even available? Is he single? He is not. But in our sizzle, because Jason Tatum is world champion. Major celebrity.

Major celebrity. A lot of people have a crush on him.

When you say on this broadcast that you have a crush on Jason Tatum, that is breaking news, and we will use that for clickbait, for sure. Yeah.

Absolutely. People were mad, though.

If you're starting to jump between Jason and LMI, we apologize. We do. But she also, Jen, mentioned that she has a crush on this gentleman from the Cleveland Cavaliers. What's his name again?

Max Truce.

Max.

And he followed her.

And he followed her on Anji.

I wonder if he DMed or she DMed.We're making connection.

I hope so. Some of the better of. Don't just followI want to ask her. And do nothing about it. Someone's got to do That's true.

Are we matchmakers?

Well, nick was on-New segment? Yeah. Beverly Hills matchmaker.

I'm a professional matchmaker.

Please tell me you slid in.

To Max's DMs.

Max's. Is it M-A-X?

Yes. I would like to know the alternative spelling.

M-a-c-k-s? Max. Lita Kennedy for sure.

All right, we'll see if Jen responds.

Are we sliding into Justin Timberlake's DMs after his guilty spell? Absolutely not. Immediately no.

That was brutal.

For the listeners, for context, Timberlake pleaded guilty to lesser charge of driving while ability impaired. He was sentenced to a $500 fine with a $260 surcharge and agreed to make a public safety announcement about the dangers of drinking and driving. On top of that, he also has to do community service between 25 and 40 hours, which he has a year to complete. But the Internet is going after his speech because right after... As they should.

Go ahead.

No, you go ahead. I was just saying as they should. They should be going after him for sure. Tell the people what he said.

No, I agree. But basically, he said, Even if you've had one drink, don't get behind the wheel of a car. There are so many alternatives. This was a mistake that I made, but I hope anybody listening or watching can learn from this mistake.

He also said, There's Uber, there's taxis. We know that. We did not get the DWI, sir. You did. So you take the fucking Uber in the taxi. That was the most condescending speech I've ever heard in my life. And apparently, nick said that the judge ordered him to give a speech.

So that's why it was-Yeah, and I got to say, This judge, masterclass. This is a good judge. This is... Think about it. I mean, yes, you could have sent Justin Timberlake to jail. You could debate whether we should or shouldn't send people who get to you guys to jail, but that's for a different discussion. But you don't go to jail. Rich people, people like Justin Timberlake, a $10,000 fine, even if it was a $100,000 fine, ultimately wasn't going to-It was $500, right?

$500, yeah.

Whatever it was. This was a payout. I mean, yeah, it's nothing to him in the grand scheme of things. Shame, public humility, that fucking stings. And this judge made him do the one thing that was going to actually hurt him, which is to go out there and humiliate himself and give this speech he didn't want to give. And there was probably no way that Justin Timberlake was going to come off looking good doing this. He didn't. He looked terrible. It was just an absolutely brutal display of-It was a got you moment.

And he also was just so brick wall, no emotion, just absolutely monotone. Yeah, his heart was not in it. He doesn't give a fuck.

My favorite part was when he opened and he goes, Many of you have been following me over the years.

For many of you may know that I...

I've been doing a lot of work. Many of you may know this, how much he holds himself accountable. I'm butchering the speech, but I love how he just interjected, Many of you may already know that I like to hold myself accountable. But this wasn't it. It was like, Honestly, Justin, I don't know that. I don't.

No, I don't either.

It's giving when he got arrested and he was like, This is really going to mess up the world tour.

The world tour, yeah. Yeah.

And the cop was like, What's he talking about?

I mean, he seems like an all right guy, but I don't know. I don't know one way or the other. If he is someone, he's definitely been caught up in a few sticky, kissing someone else that's not his wife situations. He's had some bumps in the road. I don't know. There was the whole Janet Jackson the whole Brittany Spears. It's like, Maybe not. Maybe we don't know. But anyways, this judge absolutely crucified Justin. Justin probably won't drink and drive after that. I hope not. That was shame. That was shame at its finest.

I hope he's learned his lesson.

If you need a chuckle, go and watch that video. I didn't want to drink and drive after that. That's for sure. Taught us all a lesson.

Have you ever drink and drive?

No, absolutely not. But that was a sobering reminder to not drink and drive.

Religious people have prayer cards while they drive. My dad does this, and I was like, I wonder if Justin Timberlake, if I had Justin Timberlake as a prayer car before driving, I was like, you know what I mean? As a reminder not to drive.

He probably has a laminate of his world tour. That's true. Remember the tour?

Going further and further in the distance.

He's really had a tough couple of years. It's going to get better for him. You guys just don't give a fuck about him.

If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all.

That is the golden rule, isn't it?

Are there any JT fans still out there?

I'm a JT fan.

Anybody got a cricket song?

If We would want him on the show.

Sure. If he was like, Wow, we wanted him. I'm begging to come on your show.

nick has a point. He's had a bad rep the past year. He was on my wall.

The Britney Spears of it all. He was one of my first crushes. This is where I stand now.

It's a consequence of his actions.

I think he made some mistakes, but come on, man. No?

He still has a world tour. He's still making millions.

His world tour, guys. He's got the trolls.

The troll movies, he makes millions. Oh, that's true. The troll movies. He's good to go. He doesn't need me.

Okay, no. Let us know in the comment. Where do you stand on JT?

Okay, question for Natalie and Cierra. What's more humiliating, a tampon or a diaper? Humiliating?

Humiliating?

Like, answer the question, then I'll give you the context.

I mean, I'm assuming being that it's things that you wear, but since I haven't tried the diaper.

I have tried a diaper, and let me tell you, it's quite comfortable.

You like the diaper? Is this post-partum?

Yes, post-partum, I had to wear that. I wasn't wearing them like...

I wasn't trying to sound like I'm an active dad.

Yes, it was part of my wore diaper. They were quite comfortable. So I might... Embarrassing? Humiliating. Neither, I don't think. Oh, well, there you go.

Would you wear a diaper-free choice now over a tampon?

Probably not. Just because I When I was postpartum, I was wearing a diaper, and I was also wearing like, moos moos and big, stretchy pants, and did not leave my house and stayed in the bed.

Are tampons the G-strings of underwear? In the sense that...

G-strings. Wait, Nick's onto something.

Tampons are the G-strings of pants. I feel like there's some women find them really uncomfortable and hate them, and some women, that's what they rock with once they've, I don't know, once they find the right size.

The more that I get older and the more stuff that comes out about tampons, it does make me not want to wear them at all because they're like, toxic shock syndrome is getting more and more common. People are like, don't swim in a lake and then sit in it for a while. It's like there's so many things that are coming out that these women are going to hospitals for that. It's like, maybe I'll just stay the fuck away.

That makes sense. They're like, dipped in lead or some shit. That was the last thing that came out. They were like, you can get lead poisoning.

Dipped in lead?

There's lead exposure to tampons.

I just saw this viral video of a girl who didn't... She lost the cork to her wine bottle, so she stuck a tampon in and soaked it with the wine and then pulled it up. So it corked the wine bottle, but then everybody was like, Girl, the chemicals in that tampon are going to kill you.

That's crazy. And then I'm supposed to put it in my body.

Yeah. So I think I'm team diaper nowadays. Okay.

Well, so basically. So, Jellys Roll's wife. So she goes on the tour bus with Jellys Roll as he goes around the country. And she basically said, Because the quarters are so small, the bathroom's small, you flush tampons, Natalie, or any other stuff down the toilet. So she basically said, Diapers, you're going to feel so free. And like, dude, you can bleed in them. And I use a diaper a day, whereas before I used to use effing six tampons a day. So basically she's saying she uses a diaper instead of the tampons while on the tour bus. And she's like, this is the safer, more comfortable alternative.

Listen, I support that message.

I feel like I have to cross that bridge. Before, until I have a child and understand the necessity of wearing a diaper, I can't say that I would optionally do that.

You wouldn't let go. And instead of buying tampons, you would buy the box of diapers. It seems messy.

No. Someone said it's not as messy. Not as messy. Don't you have to pull it out, though?

Yeah, but it's just there. Yeah, you won't be flipping it in anyone's head.

Out in the bar. What's her name? Hailey Balvin's sister.

That started all this whole flushing tampon fiasco.

It's the best. It's the world's best women argument discussion is, do you flush a tampon or not? Because it's so divided and it's so like, I've only ever flushed my entire life, and it's absolutely fucking not. I was taught that you do not do that. It's divided. Listen, I've had to not flush a couple of them, especially here at the Lakehouse, and I don't like it. I'll be honest. How is that going?

There's no flushing at the Lakehouse.

It's too much. We're wrapping it in toilet paper, and then it's way too much.

Now, is this opted to not come here when she's on her period?

No, I'm taking the diaper approach now.

So there's this woman in London who basically married herself a couple of years ago, or 2023, specifically. Is this legal? You can do this? In London, it is. So she divorced herself after basically signing that she had an unsustentable relationship, even though she did couples therapy with herself.

You know that therapist was like, Honey, we need a different type of therapy. Thank you.

But to answer your question, nick, she married... It was a solagomy ceremony. So not monogamy, it's solagomy.

Did anyone walk her down the aisle? Was there a first dance?

Was there questions about her wedding?

Was the relationship abusive, or was there a lot of fighting?

She just said she divorced due to boredom and a desire for change, and that originally the self-marriage symbolized self-love and independence. However, now, after the couples therapy, she found it difficult to maintain a high self-demand and perfection.

She didn't want any expectations herself. I would expect this person, whoever they are, to really go to shit. No, truly. When you think about it. Couldn't expect anything from themselves. It was like, I honestly can't do it. Honestly, just putting on clothes, giving a shit, eating right. Honestly, it's way too much. Stop nagging. Stop nagging. Leave me alone.

Oh, my gosh. The arguments I'm sure she had alone.

Okay, think about it, though. This is the ultimate form of self-love because one, she married herself, chose herself. Two, divorced, chose herself. Self-love.

Wow, Justin, that's so true.

Listen, the most self-centered, narcissistic asshole in the world thinks they're the most generous, self-loving, considerate person to themselves.

I'm just trying to think. Usually, when you go through a breakup, you try to get rid of remnants and reminders of that. How do you get rid of the reminders of yourself?

Oh my God. I think we should interview this girl instead of JT.

You're just burning diaries.

Honestly, can we get this person on? Probably. I got some questions. I'm curious. Is she My interest has peaked.

A going deeper or an asnate.

Yeah, we don't need. Oh, asnate. We don't need a whole 90 minutes to figure out what's going on here. Okay.

Reality recap.

This is the segment.

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nick, do you find yourself on airplanes talking to strangers about Natalie and River?

All the time.

Yeah. Are you bragging about your family?

That's all I do. The only thing out of my mouth is my obsession with my family. And are the packers going to win next week?

nick is sitting on airplanes with his headphones. We talked about this before. His headphones and listening to all of the packer talk.

Or just staring forward for hours.

He brought dogs.

I can be friendly on airplanes sometimes. I can be. Sometimes I'm sitting next to someone I'm like, I'm intrigued.

So this TikTokeer, hear me out. She posted a TikTok and she said, If your name is Tanya and you have a husband named Pat from Waco, Texas, and he was on a delayed flight to Indianapolis yesterday, which was June the third, I just want you to know that your husband loves you so much. With a genuine love that was pouring out of him for you all when he was talking about it, I could tell he needed somebody to brag about you guys. Honestly, it was refreshing to see a man be so committed and loyal to his family even while he's gone.

Oh, my God. Love.

So is There are good ones out there.

Shout out, Tanya. What's his name? Good husband's story.

Paul?

Pat.

Pat? Yeah. Oh, my gosh. I love that. There are still good men out there.

And also, like positive content on TikTok. I love that, where it's like, usually you see the shit where it's like, was your best friend, are you best friends with this person because they were talking about you and find this person? Where it's like, it's nice to see like, hey, if you're this person, your husband loves you and your family so much.

I also didn't realize people talk to strangers on planes. I thought that was a thing of the past.

We should all challenge ourselves to interact with one stranger a day.

Yeah. Yeah, that for sure. But on a plane? Yes.

Anywhere. Grocery store, coffee shop.

Ask them, You live here or you're visiting? No, I mean- That's how you start.

No, I mean, I say this to myself as well. I am often on my phone or when I'm going to the grocery store, I'm usually just head down, pot, ear buds in my head, listening to a pot, just disconnecting. Sometimes I have to remind myself to look up, interact with people. You always feel better afterwards. You really do. When you try to just acknowledge someone else, ask them a question, you feel like that was a moment, that was something. That's all people used to do. It's just like, meet people and interact and socialize. It's just that's something we could try to practice. Justin, next time you travel, that's an assignment. I want three interesting facts.

For the record, I talked to I was just taught on a plane, you don't do that because they're going to snatch you. Snatch you? Because I grew up in the era of people getting kidnapped at airplanes.

He's from the Bay people.

You grew up on taken.

I grew up on taken.

Sacramento. No, but I was taught that... What is it? Not the airplanes. Airport.

Were you flying alone as a little boy?

Like middle school, later, yeah. I mean, I grew up with my family, but also by myself. But I was taught like no.

I would definitely tell that. I would absolutely say that as, yeah, that's good parenting.

But I have talked to some nice moms, but sometimes I'm also like, I'm on a plane for an hour.

No, but as adults, this is not advice I'm giving to children who are flying alone at the airport. Absolutely not. No.

We adults could do that. What's so crazy is whenever I lived in New York, I was 15, and I was flying to New York from Atlanta. It was my first time ever leaving home, whatever. I was by myself on this plane, and this woman sat down beside me, and she started talking to me. It was my first time on an airplane, and I was crying. I was so upset. I'm scared whatever. She's talking me through it, and I'm telling her what I'm doing in New York. She's like, I'm going to visit my daughter who lives in New York, and we're going back and forth. Fast forward four years, she comes into this jewelry store I'm working at in downtown Savannah. What? And she's like, we're both like, why you look so familiar. Where are we? And we're trying to figure it out. And then all of a sudden, we're like, Oh, my gosh. We were on the same flight together, and we went and got a cup of coffee, and we chatted. And it was the most wholesome, most amazing. Did you kept in touch with No. I wish. If you're out there. That's sweet, though.

That was a sweet story. I know. It was so sweet. So sometimes you make a good connection.

A literal connection. All right.

So everyone listening, I want to hear three fun facts you've learned about a stranger on Thursday.

Well, if you're taking a Valerius flight from Mexico to LA, you might be talking to strangers because there might be a ton of mosquitoes swarming the cabin.

This is crazy.

Yeah. This is the second time in a year that this has happened from a flight from Mexico to LA on Valerius, the specific airline. That basically, because it's rainy weather in Mexico, when they leave the doors open to clean the plane out between departures, the lights of the plane inside attract the mosquitoes. So a sworn of mosquitoes will come in to the cabin, stay there, and Valerius will still do the flight.

So what happened?

They just took the flight.

Did people just leave with a bunch of bug bites?

I don't think this is that big of a story. I don't think this is that big of a story. Get up and smack some mosquitoes. You can't.

You can only get up when the seatbelt sign is off. They come around you, you clap.

It's like hundreds. They could probably make a song out of it. It's a ton of them though. Almost one of those, what do they call it? The flash mobs where they clap together and all of a sudden it makes music or something, and they're clapping and killing all the mosquitoes. I don't think it was that big of a deal. Honestly, I'd accept that challenge.

Choreograph a dance and also kill the mosquitoes and also fly to wherever you're going. It's possible. Yes, of course. Yeah.

This is an opportunity. This is way more of an opportunity than a problem.

It is my nightmare. How did this become a story?

No, it's my nightmare. Someone complained about a couple of bugs?

Nick's only saying this because he doesn't get bit by mosquitoes. Oh, yeah. He's one of those. He's one of those who's like, They don't like me. I don't have sweet blood.

You know what that means, nick? What? Mosquitos are attracted to carbon, so that means you're not breathing as much.

He's dead.

Are you trying to die on me?

No. Are you holding your breath?

No.

Now that you say it- I'm not breathing a lot of carbon.

So you're not breathing out as much.

That's good.

Is this true? Is this real?

Well, I took global social I'm not breathing out enough of carbon. They're attracted to the carbon we breathe out. That's what I was taught in college.

Don't we all breathe out? Are you saying our levels are different?

Google that shit.

I wouldn't need this confirmed.

It's true. It's true. Watch.

I think it's to do with the blood.

Well, it's probably both. I thought it was blood type, that they were attracted to different blood types more so.

Mosquitos are primarily attracted to the carbon dioxide that humans exhale when they breathe.

I will be holding my breath and you have it outside now.

Forever. That's crazy. What does that mean about me?

That you're not breathing out as much?

How do you sit? How do you live outside? When I'm getting eat up, what are you doing? I do hold my breath a lot. Are you serious? You've known about this, you didn't want to share. I did not know this. No. Interesting. One time, Nick's always like, Kill these mosquitoes. They're eating me. They're killing me. And then one time, he's always like, I can't do it. And then one time, I saw a mosquito sitting on his neck, and I was like, You know what? I'm not going to kill it. I'm going to this mosquito bite him so that he knows what it feels like.

Did it? Yeah.

Sorry. Ben. I'm sorry. I just wanted you to feel. She chose my lens.

I have trust issues now.

I was just so tired of being itchy, and I wanted you to relate.

Talk to Darlene about this. Next session.

Wow. Do what else is going on in the world quick, please.

Is it time for OC?

We can. We could do reality TV, too.

What else we got?

Well, I mean, talking about trust issues, Pioneer Town has trust issues because Alana from selling Sunsets.

Oh my God. Nick's going to set the world on fire with this take. This is the dumbest story. I don't think we should.

Why? Everyone's going to disagree with me?

Yeah, because I don't think that's relatable to be like, I own a share in something, and that means, Aka, I own that.

I just think it's hilarious when the internet bullies people into these stupid apologies.

Like Jack Antinos.

Yeah. Really?

It's just, and what's the story? This new person on Selling Sunsets?

Yes. A new realtor, Alana, who's on Selling Sunsets, she made a comment in one of the episodes that she said, I own Pioneer Town, alluding to she owns the whole town. Then basically, the town responded being like- Which is, by the way, just a a figure of speech that really popular assholes in small towns will say, I own this town.

I have friends who have claimed to own Vegas because they know a couple club promoters. It is, one, a figure of speech. Again, also continues.

Well, so basically, Pioneer Town itself released a public statement being like, This is a baseless claim. It undermines 78 years of internationally celebrated film arts and cultural history. Then she said that Ms. Gold only contributes less than 1% of Pioneer her town, 640 acres. Basically, they were like, She lied. Then she had a... She issued a formal apology and response.

But she is, in fact, an owner of a share of this town?

Less than 1%.

But she does own...

Less than 1%, yeah.

She also owns land there, too.

She is a owner? Mm-hmm.

Of less than 1%.

No, I understand the math. But why is she...

Because she said she owns the town.

It doesn't sound to me like she owns the town. To me, it sounds like she has a share in a town.

Every Green Bay packer fan who owns a stock which is worthless says they're an owner of the Green Bay packers.

I think that's them being big fans and trying to be like, I own the packers because I love the packers. And this girl, has she ever visited this town again? You all think she should have apologized? I don't think she should have apologized because I don't think she did anything wrong. I don't think she owed anyone an apology. I think it is crazy that this town was like, No, I'm actually going to put her on fucking blast and give this statement. I think that's crazy.

What is this town about? What do they do? Is this a tourist town?

Yeah, it used to be used in early filmmaking for spaghetti Westerns, and now it's preserved. So it's a whole saloon. And then they've got the people that live there, live there. And then there's biker gangs and not a lot going on there, but it's a fun time.

They have a lot of like, film and art festivals.

A lot of music. Pappie and Harriet, a lot of indie bands play there.

This was just a marketing opportunity for them. They're just looking for some tourist bucks, and they're looking for a little attention.

Because now I do want to go.

I'm going next week.

Oh my God. Honestly, as a less than 1% owner of this town, it's probably in her best interest to Promote it.

Promote it. I'm putting it up on her massive Netflix show.

I'm going to go to City Hall while I'm there, and I'm going to be like, How much does What does it cost to have a share as an owner in this town?

You should get a share. And then you also own the town.

I'm a part owner of Pioneer town.

Thank you. To be specific.

Thank you. Come again.

Well, the valley finished filming.

Oh, interesting.

There's going to be so much.

And this is amidst Jack's moving out of the house he shared with Brittany into a new house. He finally moved out. He did, and he captioned a post, It will take some time for my new place to feel like home, but it will get there. One hour at a time, one day at a time. Oh, boy.

But I am glad he moved out.

Yeah, finally. It took all that to get him to give his wife and his son a safe place to live and not an Airbnbs. What a stand-up man.

Do we have a name for Lala's Baby yet? Has there been enough time for Beyoncé to celebrate her birthday?

We do have the name. Beyoncé's birthday has passed. What is it? Her name is Sosa Kent.

Cute. Sosa?

Yes. Did you all see the video that Lala posted? I got my placenta encapsulated and whatever by this company. I don't think it was a brand deal or anything. I think she was genuinely just saying, This is what I did, and I did it with Ocean, and now I'm doing it again with Sosa. The company posted a reel or video while they're doing her placenta. It's the weirdest commentary. She's saying how babies need... We all know that Lala got a sperm donor, and this whole point of this doing it is that she was like, I I don't want anyone to ever be able to take this baby away from me like Randall has been able to do with Ocean. And this woman is like, Babies need a father and a mother in their life. They need both parents. Biologically, the father's body temperature after birth regulates the baby while the mother is recovering from labor. The father is detrimental needs. It was the weirdest thing to say.

She was commentating off of Lala's baby announcement?

She was doing Lala's placenta thing and just talking, and she was just saying how babies need father and mother. It just seemed like such a weird- Did she tag Lala in it? It had a It was hard. That was placenta for Lala Kent.

So everyone knew. When people were reading this situation as them shading Lala. Yeah, I mean- Because it's contradictory to- That sounds like a shade, but she was saying it as if she was just reading- Just giving scientific facts.

While specifically doing Lala's placenta.

While specifically doing Lala's placenta.

That's fucked.

If I were Lala and I just promoted your company, I said all great things, and now you're going to come out saying that I need my baby is not going to be okay without a father.

That's just a little tone deaf.

Crazy.

That's crazy. Has Lala said anything about it?

I don't know. I don't think so.

I don't think so. Damn.

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All right, well, we have Jones's Journey of Love premiering to Wednesday night, and we will get into that on Reality Recap. To kick things off, we are going to review some of Jones's lovely men to get a little preview of what we might be able to watch on Wednesday night. Is that correct?

Should we rapid fire them then?

All right, Jones Man. Here we go. Bill, 68. He's from Portland, Oregon. Retired videographer. Bill would love to own a coffee shop and name it Billy Jean. Billy Beans. Billy Beans.

Billy Beans. Girl went off record.

He's handsome. Sure. He has a nice head of hair. Wow, I like him.

Where's Joan live? Let's get that out of the way. I got it.

He's giving Dosecky's guy.

Well, Joan lives in Maryland.

Okay, lives in Maryland. Opposite side of the country. All right, not him. Okay, moving on.

But he is very handsome. Bob from Marina Del Rey, chiropractor. Bob is an avid surfer, and he's ready to see if he Joan have the total tubular chemistry he's been searching for. Wow. Tubular chemistry.

Interesting. I need a chiropractor right now.

That would be nice to have as a partner.

Yeah, a chiropractor. Always adjusted. Yeah, that'd be nice.

Charles.

Hey, he's from Ranch of Pals, British.

Okay. Portfolio manager. Okay. Charles got some money, probably.

Charles is very proud of the work he's done building homes in rural Nicaragua. I love that for him.

This guy's got swag. What if I told you I took a couch off his lawn the other day? Probably. And it was nice.

Love that for you. That watch. Charles L is 66 from Philadelphia. He's a retired financial analyst. If Charles L could see anyone in concert during his golden years, he'd love to see Brittany Spears perform one day.

Get it, Charles.

I'll go with you. He may be a little toxic. We don't know.

No.

Brittany Spears.

Or he was born to make you happy.

That's true.

Choc. Choc. Not Choc. Choc.

From Wichita, he is insurance executive His guilty pleasure is shopping, and he can't resist a good sale. Okay.

I love a creative name.

One of us has to be responsible for finances.

Truly. Yeah, it's not going to work. Christopher, 64, West Babylon, New York. Contractor, Christopher loves that his birthday is on Christmas Eve. I feel like that's a lie.

It's a no.

You cannot love that your birthday is on Christmas.

No, but in fact, we can't marry him because he's just going to ruin Christmas Eve.

Every year. He's going to be like, No, it's my birthday. We can't celebrate Christmas.

He's going to be like, No, honestly, guys, I don't care. You got me twice as many gifts. I don't care, honestly. Let's celebrate the birth of Jesus.

I don't care. He is very handsome, though. He's very handsome.

Why don't they put this type of effort into their regular show?

Truly, this photo shoot is great.

They look fantastic, well-dressed men.

Love the props.

Christopher is very handsome. Moving on.

Dan, 64, Naples, Florida, private investigator. Oh, my God. The tea that he would bring home for supper.

Just make Dan your best friend. Don't marry him. Make him your best friend. That's true.

Yeah.

Dan loves to sing, just not in public.

Because we can't marry a PI. He's probably a little talk. He's probably a former cop. He's probably got some tragic stories.

He cares too much about other people's business.

But make him your best friend. He also looks like he wants to write a novel.

I love his sway jacket. He has a nice smile. Moving on. David, 68 from Austin, Texas. He's a rancher. David's hero is his 91-year-old mother.

He looks like John Ham. A little bit, yeah. I love David.

He's a rancher. Wait, look at his shirt. It's so unbuttoned. He's showing so much chest. He's showing chest.

He's got the necklaces. Oh, my God.

I love him. David, pop off.

I'm into him. Me, too. All right, moving on.

Gary, 65, Palm Desert, California, retired financial executive. Youthful. Gary is the godson of the legendary Tina Turner. What? And is also very musically gifted with a beautiful singing voice and killer dance moves.

How did he not end up on Claim to Fame? I bet he was casted for it. God's son of Tina Turner. He looks full of life. He looks vibrant. He looks youthful.

He looks very fun.

He looks like a lot of fun.

Okay. Gil, 60, from Mission Viejo. He's an educator, and Gil's favorite book is The Bridges of Madison County.

A memory of his dead wife.

Yeah, it's sad.

I don't know if he has a dead wife. But hey, honestly, we are going to be fucking crying. You thought the dead husband stories were going to get us, the dead wife stories? Oh my, the tear-jerkers, the widow stories.

We've got Greg, a long boat, key Florida, retired University vice President. President. Greg wears flip flops, 90%. Do you think he's only going to wear flip flops on the show?

Greg wears flip flops. Okay.

Put the dogs away.

The worst shoe ever.

Guy, 66. Oh, my gosh. That was the name of the first crush I ever had in preschool. His name was Guy, and he had a patch over his eye and glasses. Anyways, this one is '66. He's from Reno, Nevada. He's an emergency room doctor. Hot. Guy is planning to take Mount Kilimanjaro this fall. He's taking it. He's taking it. He's hiking Mount Kilimanjaro this fall. Love him.

Love him. What an unfortunate name, guy. When you're naming... Isn't it? Sorry. I just... For all the guys out there. I don't think it's unfortunate.

Really? He's the guy.

He's the guy. He looks like a guy who was raised with his parents being like, You're the guy.

He's an emergency room doctor. He's literally a hero. I love him. Jack, 68 from Chicago, Illinois. He's a caterer. Okay. On May 22nd, 1977, Jack was sitting in the front row at Elvis's last concert in Chicago. Okay.

That's a flex, actually.

That's a flex, yeah. Keep him growing. Love it. Jonathan, 61, Oakland. Great dresser. He's from Oakland, Iowa. Shipping consultant. Jonathan toyed with the idea of being a bodybuilder.

He was going to do it, but then he didn't.

I wonder what he looks like under that nice sweater.

I bet it's amazing. Hey, guys, what are the things that you were going to do and just didn't?

I'm sure there's a long list. Jordan, 61, Chicago. Sales manager, Jordan misses the days when visitors would stop by Unannounced.

What? What does that mean? I have no idea.

He's from a small town, and people just knock on the door. Cramer. Cramer would stop by unannounced.

Yes, of course. All right. Well, Jordan, I hope your people come visit you.

He's a Seinfeld fan.

One day. Next. He wants his Cramer. Keith, 62, from San Jose. He's a girl dad. Love that. Keith's guilty pleasure is Ben and Jerry's ice cream, and he says he can never have just one scoop. Such a girl's dad. Love that for him. Which ice cream do we think it is? I'm going to say Moose tracks. Next, we have Ken, 60, from Peabody, Massachusetts. How old is Joan?

Sixty-one.

Peabody, Massachusetts. He's a property manager treasurer. Ken is told he's a bad driver, but he's not buying it. Well, so is nick, so they have that in common. All right, moving on.

Oh, my God. Kim.

He looks like he's hiding something.

69, Seattle, Washington, retired Navy captain. Ahoy. Kim is an excellent whistleer.

I bet he can also tie a knot.

I bet he can tie a hell of a knot. He's probably seen some shit as a retired Navy captain.

Pun intended, by the way. I don't know if you guys picked up on that. Can I get a... Try not. Get married.

Oh, yeah. Okay. Cut. Next. Mark. We love Mark. Kelsey.

You would not think he... Anderson's dad. No, but let's just acknowledge the fact this is not a great picture of Mark because this is...

No, it is. He's handsome.

He's so hot, but he looks hotter on TV.

Yeah, he's not look-smaxing hair.

Mark, 57. Kelsey Anderson, winner of Joey's Season's Father. He's from Leesville, Louisiana. An army veteran, Mark is terrified of ostrages.

That's valid. I love ostrages.

I also feel like I'm a little nervous around them.

Yeah.

Next. Michael, 65. Denver, North Carolina, retired banking CEO. Michael went to Lala Palooza three times, all in his 50s. He looks like a retired banking CEO.

He's rich. Retired CEO of a bank?

I see that watch.

That motherfucker is rich.

I see that watch. And the way That way he's clasping his hands.

This guy is so rich.

And Lala Palooza three times. In his 50s? In his 50s, he's active. In his 50s, he likes to party.

He went three times?

Yeah, you're like finance banking CEO. This guy parties, for sure.

That's because he was so rich. He flew in on his helicopter. Yeah.

From Denver. He knew someone that... He owned Lala Palooza, probably. He owns it. Yeah, honestly.

He owns 0.1%..

He rode around on a golf cart the whole time, did not step feet on the property. Next. Pablo, 63, Cambridge.

Retired UN Agency Director, Noble.

All right. Pablo has taught time controlling himself around ice cream. Oh, my gosh. Him and our friend.

Older men love ice cream, huh?

You know there's a lactose Intolerant King among them who's just going to be like, Oh, whoa, whoa.

Passing out the lactade. He seems like an educator. He That facial hair is a choice.

Pascal, 69. There's so many from Chicago. Salon owner. Pascal isn't a great cook, but he makes great reservations.

This guy looks really charming. Yeah. He does look charming.

Look at all those bracelets.

His name's Pascal. When your name is Pascal, you can wear bracelets.

Absolutely. Next. R. J. 66. Irvine, California. Financial advisor. R. J. 'S favorite Christmas movie is Die Hard. Love them. Absolutely love him. That's the worst Christmas movie.

That's a note for me.

It's not a Christmas movie.

He's definitely a dude. It happens on Christmas. He's such a guy. It's not a Christmas movie. That's one of the most guy things.

I wish he would have said Home Alone. Next. Thomas, 62 from New York, New York. Oh, this is hot. He's a fire Department of New York chief. Thomas used to own a creepery in Rhode Island. Love him. I think he's great.

Fdny.

That's hot. Chief of the FDNY, down for it. All right.

Perfect. Well, good luck to John. Do you have your two favorites?

I don't remember their names, but I do have two. Next.

Well, we're excited to see Joan's journey unfold Wednesday night, and we'll get into it on a reality recap on Thursday. All right, it's time to get into Real Housewives with Oc, and I am livid. All right, it's time for a little Oc. I I'm still at a loss. I am at a loss at this point in the season. I feel like we're all being gaslit. I'm using the word. He used the term. Because I'm just confused as to it seems like the show is trying to paint this narrative of, is it fucked up for Alexis and John to do what they're doing to Shannon, or is it not? Or should we still be friends with Alexis? Can we be friends with both of them? Where I'm thinking this is obviously incredibly fucked up for what John and Alexis are doing. And this whole last episode seemed to be trying to like, Well, I'm friends with both of them, so I don't really know what to do, and trying to show Alexis in a way where it's like, She's a human, too, where I'm just more like, What? I'm so confused. Then we had Alexis was on Watch What Happens Live late last week.

John was sitting in the stands. He made an appearance for For those of you who don't know how TV is made, I'm assuming everyone who watches Bravo knows this much, but for anyone who doesn't know, John was clearly miced up in the audience. It was pre-planned that they were going to cut to him and ask him a question in the audience. Whether that was designed or requested by John and Alexis, I don't know, or just an idea from production, I don't know either.

They made it seem like it wasn't because they asked Alexis, Do you want to talk about this? And Alexis was like, Well, I mean, John, do to say for yourself?

That was clearly a plan. He was miced up. They always knew they were going to cut to him and get his POV. I only bring that up for a guy who... We haven't really talked to John. We've invited Alexis and John on the show. I'm trying to get anyone on Oasis on the show. Gina, I guess, is going to come on later, but she wants to come in the studio, so she wasn't available this week. I just want to... Heather, if you're out there, Emily, someone, why isn't... Emily a little bit what this episode.

Emily did. Yeah, Emily absolutely did.

Emily is starting to. But just someone articulate to me, why isn't everyone not screaming in horrifying fashion? What the fuck are we doing here? This is cruel. This is mean. Explain this to me like I'm a four-year-old. Justin, you seem to be fully well-versed in what this lawsuit is because on Watch What Happens Live, when they cut to John, I thought this lawsuit was about John claiming that he paid for Shannon's procedure and that she He owed him this money when in fact, she was like, Hey, we were dating. He just paid for it. But apparently, there's a claim that she said that she would pay him back, and that's a he said, she said situation. Then he goes on to watch What Happens Live, and all he's talking about is that Shannon is like, this is a slander case that he was saying that Shannon accused him of fat-shaming, or Shannon accused him of paying for everything. Where it's just like, what is it? I'm confused. So is this a Is it a gender thing? Is it he owe his money? Is this about his reputation?

I mean, you nailed it on the head. I mean, watch what happens live. He specifically said, The reason he was suing her is because I have been disparaged for almost five years. Why would I put a legal muzzle on myself so that I can't actually correct the record? And then the examples of disparaging he said were that she said she pays for everything. She said that she was his sugar mama, and that was further from the truth. And then, like you said, he claimed that she said he fat-chamed her. But the actual lawsuit that he sued her and that they're talking about on the show is that he is suing her for breach of oral contract and promissory fraud regarding the $75,000 facelift. And then promissory fraud occurs when someone makes a promise without the intention of following through on it. So that's him claiming that he said, she said, she said she would pay me back. And it's what Alexis is doing, too, where it's like, we know the lawsuit is for the facelift, which for face value, it's like, that's pretty... You probably made that purchase knowing that you loved her, that you wanted to pay for it, and that she wasn't going to pay it back.

But then Alexis and John are rewriting history and making it more of like, well, she said all these horrible things about John, even though John wasn't that. But then also that being said, John's trying to say that Shannon humiliated him, but Shannon said that, and she's been saying this multiple times, that John was proud of Shannon being on the show. So he wanted to be brought on.

What the fuck are Alexis and John doing to Shannon right now? Are they not doing the exact same thing?

Yeah.

I would argue that they're embarrassing themselves. I mean, from even just a logical PR move. I mean, honestly, Alexis and John, if you're out there, please come on the show. Maybe we're seeing it wrong. That's honestly what I want to know. I wanted to give them every opportunity to answer the questions and explain why we're not being gaslit, why they are justified for this behavior. There was a little bit in last week's episode, granted, this was weeks ago, months ago when they filmed this, but John was on speakerphone and there was a little commentary as if John said something like, Yeah, of course. Very sarcastically, Yeah, we're the bad people here. Very righteously was this like, he was speaking as if it's insane that no one else understands their POV and everyone else is thinking of the bad guy. But honestly, what are they doing? It makes no sense to me. Also, does it make sense? We keep hearing that John likes his private life. He doesn't want his reputation to be disparaged in the public eye, and that, Oh, he can't handle if he says it's false, that he paid for everything? Is he that small of a man?

Why is that bothering you so much? Why does he have an obsession with only dating housewives? If you don't like being a part of gossip, I don't know if dating and marrying housewives is the place to go. That is a community of people who love to gossip. That's what they do. It is literally their careers, and that's all he's doing is dating the people who are professional gossipers while simultaneously claiming to just not like the spotlight. But also, Can I come, please sit in the audience and get miced and dressed up like this guy wants to be big in the worst possible way. I bet John puts on Sex in the City every morning of scenes of big. His motivation for the day, and it's his big scenes. He wants to be him so bad. He had his leather jacket and his scarf. He definitely hired a stylist for that appearance. I want to have him live.

Well, they're going on red carpets. Red carpets, yeah. I remember Shannon was saying how he was saying he doesn't want to be in the limelight, any of that. And then he was like, Our red carpet debut. I think Gina was like...

Well, that's the weird part, and you said it too, nick, where it's like, Shannon said that when they were together, he was proud of her being on the show and would brag like, Oh, my wife or my girlfriend's on the show, and he would try to make as many appearances during production. But then now he's rewriting it being like, She embarrassed me on the show, but I'm going to have Alexis go on the show for me. And embarrass me further. But then you have Alexis doing the whole, He offered to pay me my salary so I wouldn't go on the show, but no, I want to be here to talk for him. So it's this weird...

And I'm floored that he even has a case. It sounds like a case of he said, she said. And again, sure, anyone with money can sue anyone. And if you have more, it's like poker. If you have all the chips, you can just lean on them.

But it's also like she has offered to pay him, and he's like, Sorry, not good enough. I want more than that. And it's You're in a whole new relationship. He's engaged to Alexis. It's like, at some point, you have to move the fuck on from your ex. Is $75,000 worth all of this? I guess it is to him. I don't know. It seems like he has plenty of money currently in this moment. I don't know why he's- But if he cares about his reputation, I've literally never heard of him before this season, and I couldn't have a lower opinion.

And it's based off of what he seems to be outside of the show. But if we have it wrong, if we are not understanding your point of view, please come and articulate it. And including Heather. This is another tough watch for Heather. And this is mostly because it's just like, Oh, I just don't know which friend I should support. I mean, like nothing more irritating in life than friends stuck between other friend drama and acting like they're the victims, especially when one of those friends is actually being victimized, when one friend is doing a fucked up thing to another friend, and then the other friends in that group act as if they're so inconvenienced by the drama. It's just like, I just don't want to get in the way when clearly there is a right and a wrong version here. And again, if we're not reading it right, if there's another side of the story, Heather, please come correct us. Please, in your very Heather De Bro way, please tell us how it is.

And Emily being like, For us, will you please sit down with her? And them being... Alexis being like, I fucking knew she'd say no. It's like, Of course she said, who the fuck would want to sit down and talk to you after everything you've done? I wouldn't.

Yeah, it feels like the end of Vanderpump when everyone was like, Get Ariana to have a conversation with Sandoval. She was like, I'm not doing it.

It was so weird that multiple people are going up being like, please talk to her.

And it's like, Why do you care?

And like, Shannon, and they're making such a big deal about Shannon being like, Alexis, I heard you wanted to speak to me, and I am not interested. Then being like, Oh, my fuck.

Why are they showing that? And again, maybe that's not the case.

No, but why can't she say that? Why can't she be like, Hey, Alexis, I'm acknowledging that you wanted to talk to me. I hear you. That's awesome. But I'm not interested in that.

Why should she be interested in her ex-boyfriend- Yeah, me too.coming at her and claiming to owe her $70,000 for a procedure that he clearly... I mean, listen, it's just not believable that she was like, Yeah, I'll pay you back. And he was like, Cool. Really? I find it more believable that this guy not only offered to pay, but insisted, and in fact, requested. I mean, If you do this, I'll pay for it, almost. I bet he saw it as an investment in himself. This was a guy who was talking about Shannon being the love of his life, his person, his forever. Baby, I'm not spending money on you. I'm spending money on us. You know what I'm saying? That's how he fucking sounded back then. It's crazy. And he's so vindictive in the whole who was unwilling to settle because I think to the sparage clause, basically, neither of them could talk shit about each other if they settled. And he wanted to still be able to talk shit about Shannon.

And Alexis being like, why the fuck did Gina show her the videos? Why would she do that or tell her about the videos? It's like, but you've been telling everyone about it for weeks. Yes. You didn't think she finally deserved to know?

Also, if these videos were as bad as they claimed it to be, he would have fucking showed them. I'm sorry, this does not sound like a guy. And what could possibly be in it? She's really drunk. It probably is, in fact, really bad, but we know it was really bad. We've been saying how bad... When this shit happened, we were hard. But we've Yeah. It's like they can't see the forest through the trees. I don't know. But again, if you're out there, John, Alexis, Heather, anyone, someone, please.

You've invited them.

Emily, I think, said it really well where she was like, It's getting dirty. It's getting salacious. It's What does that mean? She just said it for what it was. She's like, You need to stop.

She's like, You're attacking a woman while she's down. Yeah. Which she is.

John also knows what she went through with the lawsuit with Tamra and Jim, Alexis's ex-husband. So it's also like you're bleeding her dry by making her have to pay for all of these legal fees, all of this stuff, to still get to the conclusion that you won't accept the money that you're asking for. And all she asked for was a... Oh, God, what's it called when she said it's a clause that she wanted to be- Non-disparagement. Non-disparagement. It's a discouragement clause, and that's all she asked for. And he was like, Absolutely not. I'm not going to accept the money that I'm asking for because I want the ability to disparage you?

It's bizarre. What did we think of the Gina Katie, Heather fight at the end?

Katie accusing Gina of using Heather. I'm team Heather and Gina.

I'm team Gina, for sure. It makes no sense.

Gina is like, I've never talked to Heather about real estate. Why would I be using her for real estate connections?

Katie is trying to figure her way out of this haul, and I think she's a very smart person who's usually capable of figuring her way out of these types of hauls, and I think she's met her match with Heather. I think Gina is just too honest and too expressive. She might make a mistake, she might foolish, she might speak out of turn, she might get a little sloppy, but she's not this calculated. She's not that You know what I'm saying? Exactly.

That's what Heather said. Katie is.

Heather might be as well. But Gina's not.

Gina's not. Well, Heather said that about Gina. She was like, She tells me too much details. So she's not lying.

No, I mean, Heather has it right. Katie needs to take the L I'll admit she was wrong, and move on. But Katie's not willing to take the L. Katie wants to get on Heather's level. She wants Heather to acknowledge the misunderstanding. Then Katie will say, Well, whatever part I did, I mean, I'm sorry, too, but Obviously, it's a misunderstanding, really what it is. Katie doesn't want to be like, No, I made a move. I was a rookie. I went after the queen. I got knocked the fuck down, and now I know my place on this show, and I got to work my way back But you're stuck at the mail room, and she doesn't want to be stuck at the mail room. She's stuck at the mail room.

It was definitely a rookie mistake to come in with your drama being Heather. Because it's like a kiss of death when it's your first season is you being the center of the drama.

That was a big swing.

But the drama is you are the problem.

Well, and Heather also never indulges. She'll be in the drama, but she's like, How do I get out of this? Where I'm like, You're starting shit with somebody who's not going to give anything back to you.

Or even Alexis. It's like your storyline, your first season is that you're hating on Shannon. You look bad.

You look bad.

Yeah.

I respect. Listen, you show up in prison. Sometimes you want to go after the big king to take charge, but sometimes the big king knocks you down a few pegs. She went for it. She lost. Now she's got to earn the respect of Heather, and it's going to take a while. If I'm Heather, I'm waiting to least five more seasons.

I'm trying to think of a good season where a housewife entered with the drama being her and then survived.

What I was going to say, though, is I also I feel like Tamra has her little producer hat on, and she's feeding stuff to Katie that's making it 10 times worse because it's like, that's what Tamra does. She gets involved in everybody else's stuff, so nobody's looking at her. All of a sudden, it's like Katie's having this one-on-one conversation with Tamra, and it's like, no, Gina convinced you. I'm like, why are we even furthering the narrative when we weren't even assuming that? Tamra came up with that. I'm sorry, but I'm like, that's partially why she... I mean, she's a great housewife, but she's one of my least favorite personalities because that's what she does is she it's people against each other and is the loudest one in the room pointing fingers, so nobody looks at her.

Yeah, her yelling at Gina being like, You getting so defensive is giving guilty.

And it's like- No, it wasn't.

Or she's like, People are lying on her. And she's like, What the fuck? No, I didn't say that.

And also a good moment with Gina was at the table when she was talking about Shannon's DUI and whatnot. She was like, You don't get to dictate how other people support their friend. Just because you don't like that Shannon is still drinking. I already went through a DUI. I already made choices for myself, and I can still choose to support her whatever way I want to. But Tamara wants to control how we all feel or think about Shannon. I like Gina. Yeah.

Tamara just seems to me, best case scenario, she's not as cruel or as evil as a person as she comes across. But she's just showing up to work. She's like, I'm a professional. None of these ladies at the end of the day are my friends. I'm here to do what I need to do to make TV. And it just comes across as disingenuous and just fake. Or she sucks, and she is this mean or cruel. But I am over. There's just no authenticity. It's just she is just there to spice it up. I don't know. You see through it a little bit.

She's the first one to get on her Instagram and start crying and saying that she's being picked on. But it's like, look at how you treat your friends, your non-friends, whatever, just for a paycheck. Then Vicky makes one comment about her, and she's going on her Instagram crying about leaving her family alone. But I'm like, you're everybody's family on camera.

Tama seems like someone who just absolutely has made her bed, and she seems to be willing to make her bed and thriving in the bed that she's making. But no one has an appetite for her complaining about this situation. She finds this, yeah, it's just like, wait, you have every opportunity to just one time be the nice person. Be empathetic. Pick the person who's down, bring them back up. Tama is so good at punching down, and it just gets a little...

I wonder if going into the season, they thought that the storyline would shift the audience to support Alexis and Tamara over Shannon. Because I'm thinking in parallel to Salt Lake City last season, everybody thought that they were going to hate on Monica, the audience, but everybody ended up loving Monica. So I wonder if they were like, Oh, Shannon's going to get the villain at it because she got a DUI.

I mean, yeah, that's definitely possible. But Shannon was in a different way, but similar to Monica. What we love more than anything on reality TV is authenticity, is the willingness for someone to say, You know what? I am down. I'm broken. I am trying my best. Because whether we like to admit it or not, and that's why we love these shows, is that we are all fucking messes. We all have our secrets. We all have our flaws. We all have our great deep down insecurities. We've all had moments in life that we've been bullied. And when we see someone really down bad, but really trying their best to pick their self back up while owning their mistakes, We can't help but want to root for that person. I think a lot of times we see people in reality TV, they're so used to working with inauthentic people and people who are so afraid to actually just be vulnerable. But I think, yeah, they almost miscalculated just how mean they were and how down bad Shannon is. Maybe they just didn't anticipate this level of vulnerability from Shannon because every week we're watching this person who's just truly being emotionally abused.

I I don't know how else to look at it. It is mean, it is cruel. Yeah, I don't know. Maybe they misread the room. I don't know because it's just I do not get it every week. It's gotten to the point where I'm really hating everyone but Shannon.

Yeah. Seeing Shannon's face this episode, I felt so bad for her. And then Heather had a cringe moment where she was like, You need some makeup on. I was like, This woman has been crying because her life is literally falling apart. And you want to criticize her for not having makeup on? It's actually wild. But also another vulnerable moment that happened was Emily this episode talking about the fashion show and her size. I don't know if you've seen how she's obsessed with working out. And clearly, she's questioning if she has some form of body dysmorphia because it's like she thinks she's working so hard, and she has lost a lot of weight, and I think she looks great. But it was something that I related to because I feel like, especially as a woman, being concentrated on weight and appearance and whatnot, where I was like, how... She was saying, somebody saying an oversize jacket, where I'm like, That's just the name of the article of clothing. But she was like, No, for me, it makes me feel like I've had no progress. Maybe I'm second-guessing myself, looking in the mirror, did I actually lose weight?

And I thought that was a really powerful thing for her to bring up because I feel like it's something that people deal with all the time. But she's in such a platform in an area where you think she's so hard and tough. And I was like, Okay, so here we're finally peeling back the layers and the insecurities of what she deals with on a day-to-day basis. And it was super relatable.

Yeah, it was. I appreciated her opening up about that. It looks like in next episode, it gets really, really crazy with Heather and her. Oh, yeah.

I love that.

Because Emily talks about how she's like, You made me bring jeans. I just felt like, and Heather was like, She's mad at me because I told her to bring you.

It looks like it gets really... They're about to get into it, and I don't know.

I hope Heather just says, Sorry. Because I feel like that's a situation where you're like, That was oversight. That wasn't my intentions. But I'm like, Honestly, truly sorry.

I have no idea what it's like to be in your shoes, and I I don't know what triggers you, and different things may trigger me. So I'm so sorry. Whatever I said, whatever I did, if that triggered you, I'm so sorry. But it doesn't seem like that's how it goes down.

Oh, shit.

Well, that sounds like a wild episode of OC, which we'll get into next week. We got a couple of big premieres coming out this week, both tomorrow night. We got the Golden Bachelet, we got Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. We'll get into both of them on Reality Recap on Thursday. All right, we'll see you on Thursday. Bye.