I got a few tour dates to tell you about Wallingford, Connecticut, Portland, Maine, Banger, Maine, Moncton, Canada, Las Vegas, Nevada. We'll be back for the USC LSU football weekend. Oklahoma City, Northern Little Rock, Springfield, Missouri, Kansas City, Missouri, Sioux Falls, South Dakota, La Crosse, Wisconsin, Green Bay, Wisconsin, Moline, Illinois. You can get tickets for those. At theovon. Com/tour. Thank you so much for your support. Today's guest is a drummer for one of America's greatest rock and roll bands ever called Motley Crou, you know it. He also loves Japanese shrubbery. We're going to learn some things about this little cat. He spent years behind the drum kit, and he still gets it done. You know him, and I'm happy to get to. Today's guest is Mr. Tommy Lee. Shine that light on me. I'll sit and tell you my stories.

Shine on me, and I'll I'm on the road.

I have a fucking... Dude, I got an ear. One of my ears, I can't hear. I think there's something... I don't know what happened to it. It's just been getting... I'm at the age, I feel like, where if something starts breaking, you're like, Am I going to go get it fixed or am I just going to... Dude.

You know what I'm talking about? Yeah, I get it. I'm like, I have a reason for my shit breaking down slowly.

But I'm like, Fuck it.

Do I fix it or do I just leave it? I just say, What a lot.

Yeah. It fits in with your vibe, too. You're like, I can't. Yeah. Should Tommy be able to hear at this point? Probably not. Because he still deserve all of his senses. That's what a lot of people would probably say.

Dude, that's hilarious.

But yeah, my shit's just like, I don't know what's going on. But then I'm like, Yeah, do I go get this shit fixed? Or am I just like, This is the part of my life where one of my ears is gone, or one of my ears can't hear anymore, out of one ear.

What happened? Did you... I don't know. Did something blow up or just like lots of loud music?

No, I think just... I don't know. Could have just been listening to some chics' bullshit. I don't even know what happened to me. Or just, yeah. I don't know. I just haven't had time. It's all good, man. It just is what it is, dude. That's cool. Yeah. I think it's been... It made some of my dreams weird. I keep having this. Do you ever have any recurring dreams?

No, it's the fucking weirdest thing. I don't really dream a lot. My wife dreams all the time. Every morning, she's like, Oh, my God, I had the craziest dream. And she's like, You don't dream.

You lived one. I'm living it. Maybe if you get to live a dream, it's like God's like, Hey, we're not doing You can't play both sides of the net. That's awesome. It could be. It could be. Because dreams are... I think you're... I don't know. That's interesting. Yeah, dude, you got to live such a dream, man. Do Do you ever look at your life and you think, did I do it well enough? Did I service the opportunity enough? Is there ever some thoughts like that?

Well, you're getting all heavy.

Or is that weird? I don't know.

I think mostly I walk around with a shitload of gratitude. I'm constantly pinching myself like, fuck, I still get to do this. I still get to rock the fuck out, go do this, go do that. I get to live, man. So I've just been really grateful lately because could not be here. Yeah. You know?

Oh, and yeah, you guys definitely.

Yeah. And fuck, I want a spaceship, man. I want to hang around long enough because I'm still pissed, dude. The year 2000, we were supposed to have fucking... Where's my fucking my machine? I wanted to fucking just... Dude, going to Theo's. I'm here.

Yeah. Come on. You think at this point, we'd be able to email people to each other or something? Or like...

Email people Yeah.

I think like-Send it. Yeah, just send it. Like a DoorDash shows up and you're like, Oh, your two houses off, and you just forward them. That'd be crazy, bro. That'd be pretty great, actually. That would be. But sometimes I wonder if they had that travel where you could like a Warp or whatever, you could just go in a machine and then it sent... Next thing you know you're in Cedar Rapids or something. I wonder, would you get... Would some people show up in their fucking arms? It's like there's a glitch or whatever.

Something failed in the transmission. Is that what you're saying?

You have a show that night in Des Moines, and they- They were like, Fuck. No arms. They were like, Fuck, dude.

Send me back.

Try us again. Yeah, that would be the crazy part because sometimes you would just have to go do... If it's during Christmas and the holidays are so busy and like, Oh, you got the wrong arms, and they mix you up or whatever, you show up with some big fucking BLM arms or whatever. You're like, Oh, shit, dude. I don't even know what I'm talking about. Tommy Lee, thanks for coming in, man.

Thanks for having me, dude. This is fucking cool.

Yeah, it's really cool, man. Crazy, dude. Just because, obviously, so many people tell you all the time, Dr. Feel Good, just so much of just like, me, my brother would beat me to you guys's music. That's crazy. Yeah. I was the drum dude. I was a snare for my brother, and it was awesome, but it was loving. It was like,. Oh, Rob. But it was just so crazy. We used to get all the rocker magazines, and they'd always have the pictures in there look so cool, and the stories would be so vague, but somebody would be bleeding or something. Remember those magazines, dude?

Yeah.

Like, Kegar.

They're gone.

Kegar? No, what was one? Kegar? No, what was the one? Kegen? No, is that it? Oh, Kerang? Kerang, yeah.

Kerang was the European version. Yeah.

Yeah, dude. Somebody got Kerang in our neighborhood somehow, and we would... Kerang. And then what are some other ones that we got? That shit was so great, though.Circus?Yeah, Circus, dude.Circus.

Was another one.Circus, yeah.Yeah..

Yeah, Circus, dude.

Was another one?

Circus, yeah. Yeah, It was so great when those came in.

Carang.

You guys are touring still.

Yeah, we're finishing up for the remainder of the summer. We're just doing some festivals here and there until, I think, September we finish up, but we're still finishing up that last stadium tour. But the summer is now just some festivals, a assorted here and there, which is fun, man. It's different to... How do I explain it? You probably are familiar with this one-off stuff because you're doing comedy. You like, fly in, do show Come back. Where on a tour, you get on a bus and you come fucking home for a year and a half. So these weekend ones are fun. We just did one this the last weekend and literally left from Vanhys, went to Minot, played the show, and was back 24 hours later. And it was just like, This is cool, too. It's weird to start up and stop like that. But it is cool because you're in and out.

Yeah, it's weird. It's like there's times when it's like I'll be out on the road and I'm like, God, I want to be home. But then I'll be home and I'm like, I want to be out on the road. Then sometimes it gets to a point where it's like, I don't even know if I want to be home anymore.

Dude, that's the exact... The grass is always greener. If you're out on the road, you're like, Fuck, man, I'd kill to sleep in my own bed. And then when you're at home, you're like, Fuck, I want to get back out. Yeah, you're like, My own bed has my wife in it.

You're just never happy. You're like, I got to get out of here, dude.

Fuck, I know. Yeah.

Yeah, it's definitely-You find it hard to relax?

Do you like to just keep it moving?

Yeah, I want to keep going.

Yeah, I get that vibe from you.

I want to keep going because I think you start to do some things being like, Oh, well, What else could I do? And I don't think you know that until you do some... Until some little opportunities come, you're like, Oh, wow, this is possible. You're like, Well, what else could I do? What else am I capable of? Am I using my skills to the best? Right.

Trying to be better, man. Yeah. Trying to be better always. I get it.

What keeps you... How do you relax these days? What calms you out?

Dude, about seven or eight years ago, I got into It's a fucking bonsai, man. And that's been like a lifesaver. It started out as just a fascination from all the times going to Japan. I'd always go to the Japanese gardens and be like, Fuck, this is the most peaceful, beautiful shit I've ever seen in my life. How do I... Give me some. How do I...

Give me a couple of grams of that. Right? It's like nature by the gram. It is.

I just started fucking watching YouTube videos on the art of it and the practice of it and how to do it. I just went down a rabbit hole, and I found it to be the most relaxing, fulfilling, get me close to nature, shit to just even me out because I'm like you, too. I'm pretty fucking hyper. I don't really I like to sit still much. But that was like, I found my thing, man.

Oh, wow. This is it?

Yeah.

I thought they were way smaller than that.

That's you? Yeah.

In the white shirt? Yeah. Oh my God, dude. I thought that was a lesbian. No offense, dude. I know a lesbian, but yeah, I thought... I was like, Holy sorry, bro. I was like, Looking for you, dude. Oh, that's awesome. And this one came with real Asian people.

This is in Nashville, right outside of Nashville. Right outside of Nashville, that's at Bjorn's nursery. Oh, wow. He's now moved on to Japan. But yeah, that's on the large size bonsai. There's much... I mean, there's little, little guys and medium, large.

So what is it? Because it almost looks like right there, it's almost like you're a God over this little tree. It's like that's what it looks like right there because I never realized how it looks like a whole big tree just compact.

Yeah, that's basically what it is. I mean, people go up into the mountains and they'll dig out 20, 30, 40, 50-year-old trees and bring them back, cut them down, cut them all back, and put them in a small pot and just start over. And that's years and years of work. Really?

Yeah. So it takes a lot of work to get a bonsai to really grow?

Yeah. Looking like that, a lot of years. Wow. Yeah. You're right. It's a project, and you're calling it godlike, but you're putting in a ton of love and your time and everything into this tree. It's like a almost. Oh, yeah, I bet. So there's a lot more gratification from just it being a tree for me. I just love all that, man. Really? I got, I think I'm at around 43 trees now. I'm fucking obsessed.

Damn, yes. You're an addict, really.

Yeah, I'm an addict.

And do you keep them inside or where do you keep them at?

I bring them inside and enjoy them when the sun goes down.

Damn, bro.

But most trees, that's the first thing people, the mistake they make. I don't know if you're driving around, you see the guy by the side of the road in a van selling those little bonsais. You ever see that shit driving to the beach or something?

Oh, yeah. If you're heading towards Malibu or something on PCH?

Yeah. The first thing people do is go like, Oh, yeah, I got to get one. I want a bonsai. And they put it inside. And they kill all the trees. That's the dude. Yeah. Dude, these are junipers and pines and shit like that. They don't grow indoors. But these guys don't tell people that. I mean, there's very few that will grow inside. Some of the ficus, but very few. Most bonsai trees, specimens, go outside.

So it says right here, The Practice of Bonsai And how development incorporates a number of techniques, either unique to bonsai or are used in other forms of cultivation. So you trim the leaves. What all the things you do to them?

Yeah, you're constantly pruning, trimming, fertilizing, wiring, You take different gage wire and you're telling the branches where to go, styling the tree all out. You're You're dictating how this thing is going to... Your vision of how the tree will look its best.

And is there a certain time when you go do it, Tommy, or is it just like, you're like, I'm feeling this would be something to do today. How much of a responsibility is it as an owner?

It's daily, man. It's just part of the program. I'll wake up and like, rip some rips and coffees and cigarettes, and then I go out and talk to the trees and chill out for a while. Got to get the day started right, man.

Oh, for sure, bro. You're a grower and a shower, dude. That's what's crazy, bro. I can't even believe that. Wow. That's fascinating.

You'd love it, man. I don't know if you like tripping out and just creating shit, but if you like trees you like creating?

I love being creative. The wild thing is once life gets busy, it's hard to be as creative. It's hard to be as creative, I feel like. Did you ever feel like that with touring and stuff? Because I can only imagine for you guys, it seemed like it was... Once you launched, it was just a brush fire, huh?

With your band. Yeah. Fuck, man. Kind of nonstop. Yeah. You're always fucking doing something. If you're not touring, you're in the studio making the music. If you're not making the music, you're taking a break to start a new record. You're always doing shit.Was there choices thatI don't know what the fuck I'm getting at. It's all right.

I don't even know what the fuck I'm talking I'm not even talking about. It's okay, man. What's one of the hardest parts about being about success as a group did you find? Because success as an individual, you have partners, and you have teammates, and you have people that support you. Sure. But as a group, it's almost like you divided by four, or by however many people are in your band. So it's like, fuck. It just seems like it'd be so hard to navigate to keep everything going to maintain the success.

Yeah. Yeah, you're 100% right, man. Anytime there's more people other than yourself involved, balancing four, three other guys and making that work is really rare, man. Really, really rare, and it's not easy. And somehow we've managed to fucking keep it together. There's only a handful of that are still doing it. Oh, yeah. Shit, all of our peers just fell off here, fell off there. And that's what I was saying. I'm just really grateful because that shit doesn't really happen all the time. I don't really know how to explain it.

Were you the glue in it? Do you feel like were you a peacekeeper? What was your role? Do you feel like? Or were you more part of the problem? No. You know what I'm saying? Because you can be one or the other. And some days it's day to day. It's like some days I know it's like, okay, today I'm part of the solution, and today I'm part of the problem.

Yeah, dude, I'm absolutely both. Absolutely both. But you got to have that, right?

I guess. I don't know. Some people are good at just being part of the solution, I feel like.

Yeah, that's true. That's probably the better way.

I just don't know if I...

That's boring, though.

Yeah. Yeah, for sure. But I can't imagine that you guys survived that much because so many bands just disappeared. So many of them people, singers died. Even Stone Tipopal, like Scott Weiland, when I was growing up, that was a crazy dude. That sound was just something else.

The best. I loved STP.

Did you guys ever tour with them or no?

We never toured with them, but we were on a couple of festivals with them. That's That's where everyone meets up when you're on festivals. It's like the Pumpkins, Motley Crue, STP, fucking Van Halen. You know what I mean? That's where everybody links up and you're all... That's fun. The festivals are fun, man.

Yeah. Because otherwise, you're just by yourself. You're with your coworkers and your bandmates. But yeah, it's a... Yeah, people think that everybody always hangs out together, and it just doesn't get to happen like that a lot.

No, pretty much only festivals. When you're out touring with another band, it's just you guys. Or Christmas parties.

You ever throw any sick Christmas parties? Did you ever have a party? Some people have like, This is the year, this is the time of year. I throw a fucking party every year and it rocks.

Oh, whoa. I mean, I've thrown some parties, but nothing like every year. This is the one. Do you do that?

No.

No ragers?

No, a lot of times I would just end up getting drugs and doing them by myself at home. That's the best. It was like the scariest and the best. I would like, rip some cocaine. I'll be like, All right, man, I'm going to get my shit together. Things are going to be different. And then I would just walk in the other room and I was like, I got to go check on that cocaine. And I would go back.

Just one more before I go to sleep. Yes.

That's That's the craziest, dude. The hardest thing to do is hide your cocaine in the other room, dude.

Yeah.

I would try to hide my cocaine from myself, dude. I remember there would be times I would even blindfold myself, right? Yeah. Walk around my apartment like this, right? With the cocaine in my hand and then throw it somewhere, right? Sometimes I would get dizzy and then just throw it like that while I was spending.

So you don't know where it went?

Yeah. And then, dude, seven minutes later, dude, where the fuck? Oh, I would have moved everything from one side of the other. Just fucking... You're in an apartment, so you'd have to move everything so quietly, dude. When you're high on cocaine, any sound is the loudest. That is so loud.

Oh, dude.

Oh, my God. Because I think you don't want to not hear maybe some cocaine in the distance. You're like, Holy shit, was that some cocaine? But then it's like I get my skin starts getting warm and it feels like my heart is like, I don't know if we're going to keep beating or not. And you're like, All right, hold on. Let's calm down a little bit. Or let's ride a will. Did you ever ride a whale or anything like that?

No. No, that's pretty heavy, dude.

Yeah. Even when I was dying, I guess I was a Chatty Cathy or whatever. But yeah, I would fucking write a will. I've written probably, yeah, 16, 17 wills over the years.

Oh, my God. That's wild.

Oh, it's sad. Because I would feel bad if somebody found me whatever. I want them to...

Oh, you have it all...

Kind of panned out like, Hey, sorry. My bad. I would start with usually or something like that. Because you wanted to ease them into it.

Oh, my God, dude. Because we had the same sober date at one time.

You may not even remember it. I remember I went to a meeting one time. This is probably about four years ago, and it was at a house meeting in Beverly Hills. Yeah. Yeah, nice guy would let people use his home even if he wasn't there. We had the same... I want to say it was October 17th or something, but I could be totally wrong. Then I lost that at some point.

Yeah, and I did, too. Okay. All right. You know what, dude? Here's the problem.

Tell me what it did.

Here's the problem. And maybe this is true for you. Right when I get to a fucking year, I'm so excited that I fucking did something for a year that I want to celebrate. Yeah. I only make it a year every fucking time because I'm so pumped. I'm like, Fuck, yeah. And then I party, and then I'm like, One. Fuck. Every time, dude.

And you have long arms, so I bet raising your hand in the meeting sucks the most, dude. If you have short arms, people are like, I didn't even see him. But you fucking throw that fucking giraffe up there. People are like, God.

It is messed up, though, because there is that level of excitement at hit in one year that I think you just want to fucking rearrange somebody's fucking asshole.

Yes.

Yeah, you want to fucking celebrate because you actually did something really good. You just fucking, I don't know. You're proud.

Yeah, you want to celebrate. You want to celebrate. Fuck. Do you remember the first line of cocaine you ever did or no? What? You remember the first time you ever did cocaine or no?

The very first time I did. Fuck. No. I don't. I remember the first time I did acid, but I don't remember the first time I did cocaine.

Yeah, I can't I imagine not remembering it, but that's awesome that you don't. You probably should if, yeah. I think people sometimes probably look at you and be like, That dude, no way that dude remembers the first time he did cocaine.

Yeah. Is that a good thing or bad thing? Do you remember?

Yeah, I remember, dude. I was in Tucson, and this dude who used to bike to work all the time, right? He was in his 40s, and that was a dead giveaway that he did a lot of cocaine. My buddy Dennis, he was a bus boy like me, which was also a dead giveaway that this dude was obviously using his money and extracurriculars, dude. And he would get all coked out and bike to work in the desert. And I'm like, this dude's a fucking animal. And he had severe sunburn all the time. And he took me to a party, and it wasn't a party. It was just two guys doing cocaine upstairs somewhere at an apartment complex. And I walked in, and this dude comes up from doing some cocaine, and he only had one eye, I remember. And I was like, I thought in my head, I was like, Oh, fuck. I wonder if he hit it so hard. He just sucked his eye back into his head. That's where part of my brain was. And I was scared, and I was young. And I was young, and they were all older. But then, yeah, we started doing some cocaine.

And the guy had a bunch of free oranges there because I guess they had some oranges nearby or something. And, yeah, I remember eating oranges and doing some blow and then catching the bus. Wild combo. So obviously pretty sad. And you'd think God would be like, Hey, this is such a lame experience. You're not going to want to do this. But then it just, I don't know. There was times, I don't want to romanticize it too much because I don't want somebody going out there and just getting rid of their family right now.

But it's like-Yeah, there's some kid out there right now gathering oranges. I got to do this.

Things are going to change. But yeah, then it just sometimes it It was fun. I mean, if you were involved in sex or hooking up with a way, it just added excitement. It had a dangerous element. That shit was fun. There's some famous comedy duos out there that really get it done. I'm talking about Spade and Farley, Key and Peel, Siegfried & Royce, all of them. But what about the perfect duo when it comes to building your business? That's you and Shopify. Shopify is the global commerce platform that helps you sell at every stage of your business, from the launch your online shop stage to the first real-life store stage, all the way to the did we just hit a million orders stage? Shopify is there to help you grow. We had a moment in our business where we'd been selling T-shirts out of a basement near Akron, and things had to change, and And that was great, but we just had to take another step, and Shopify helped. It was a breakthrough for us, and we got to the next level with our store. And now we're able to complete orders of things that people want in a timely manner.

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The first time I ever did it, I was fucking 13. Damn. I know.

Sorry, but that's crazy.

Yeah.

Who had it?

This girl from my school, she had it. Fuck, what a fucking trip, man. That shit was wild. Yeah. Yes. Yeah. And immediately, you do all the shit that you heard you're not supposed to do. Like, dude, whatever you do, don't look in the mirror. Where's the mirror? Yeah. Doing all the dumb shit.

Watching your skin fucking breathe a little bit. That shit was always pretty cool.

Yeah, dude. I remember fucking this It's a long story, but towards the end of the night, I had like a... You remember that classic Farrah Fawcett poster with the big-The red? Big nipples, ripping through her bathing suit. Yeah. It's a classic Farrah Fawcett poster. Yeah. That's the one, dude. God, boy. Yeah, that was on my wall by the side of my bed. I just remember looking over at that and just couldn't figure out, how are those nipples that fucking hard? They're like sausages. I just stared at I don't know why. Yeah, they're obsessed.

Those fucking NASA hats.

Yeah, look.

I mean, those bitches are fucking... Those things are taking the, Hey, the turkey's done, brother. God damn.

Yeah.

Wow. But that's crazy. Was there a point where you started... Because once you become as famous as you guys have become in your lives, you get to meet all the hottest chicks, dude.

Yeah, you do.

And was that weird? If you get to meet the hottest chicks and you're like, Holy shit, these are the hottest chicks.

It's weird.

Because it's definitely... I can easily tell you what it's like not getting to meet those chicks, right? I can meet some chicks, right? But if you're like, Dang, that's the hottest chic. And then you're just there talking to them. That had to be crazy. Or were you good with chics even early on in your life?

Not really. Not really. It was more loner-y. I couldn't wait to get out of school and go home and play my drums in the garage.

Okay. Even if it was by yourself? Yeah.

I wasn't really chasing skirt until later.

What about your first kiss? Do you even remember it I do, dude. Yeah.

I don't know what it is about this, but it was the most romantic, at least in my eyes. Yeah. Fuck, I don't even know. It was this little girl down the street. We used to play all the time. We were friends. I think it was probably five.

Oh, damn, you're going to say 15.

No. I was like, God, I'm a fucking late bloomer. Yeah, dude. Five. Loaner boy. Yeah, like five. We were playing like hide and seek or something in front yard, and I was looking for her, and she was around behind these bushes. And these bushes, they had a bunch of these little red berries on there. I don't know what the fuck came over me. I was like, I picked a berry, and I put it. I said, Let's kiss. And I put the berry in between our lips. And I don't know what that was supposed to signify or what that meant. It went, but I don't know. I grabbed a berry and I just thought it would be the coolest thing ever to put a berry between our lips. And she did it. And we did it. And I'll never forget that shit for the the rest of my life.

Romantic, really.

It's weird.

Yeah, definitely weird, dude.

In my eyes, it was like I had grown up. I was like, whoa, I just did it. I did the thing.

On to the next thing.

Yeah. I don't know what the berries were supposed to-I think it's also...

Well, it's a bait thing. It could be the apple from the Bible or something. Who knows? You don't know what little fable is getting in your head. It could It could have been from that thing where they got the two animals eating the spaghetti or something. You know what I'm talking about?

Yeah. Or it could have been, for all I know, maybe there was some danger in there. Like, this is poison Poisonous.

Oh, yeah. A little bit of Romeo and Juliet.

But we're going to pull this off. We're above the poison. I don't know.

Let's take a risk here together. I like that. You in? Here's a five milligram bear. Let's go. Yeah, dude. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah.

Maybe that's where my mind was because there had-A romantic, you think, growing up a little bit?

Full on. Yeah. Full on, dude. Just a sucker.

A sucker for a woman that showed you attention thing?

Well, just a sucker for surprise, for just-Romance. The chase. Oh, yeah. Yeah, sure.

Yeah, dude. Fuck. Oh, yeah, dude. I remember seeing a girl one time for the first time. I mean, I'd seen my sisters, but they were whatever. But I remember just like, I was on what was a vacation or something, but somebody had driven us somewhere. You were with your sisters? No. I'd seen my sisters or whatever, but I'd never had any... I'd never looked at them, obviously, as girls, I guess, really.

Oh, yeah. They're more like your bros.

Yeah. They're just like my brothers with tits that I'll never see, which is fine. Which is fine because that's how God wants it. I mean, if God wanted you to see your sister's tits, he'd have made them your cousin. That's what my uncle used to say all the time, but he was a fucking weirdo, and he's going to be... I mean, I don't know if he's doing fine or whatever. But I remember, dude, I went to Dallas or Houston or somewhere. I don't know. It might have just been across town, but I went by this river, and I was just getting something from this picking up rocks or doing some things that kids do or something, trying to step on a temple. And I looked over and there was a girl there. And her family might have been 20 feet away. I don't know. But in my mind, it was just me and her. It was like, yeah. And I was like, Yeah. And I was like, What? Yeah. And then I was like, Oh, she... I went into some negative place, but it was just magical, man. It was the first time I'd just seen a girl.

And then when I got a little older- Did you kiss this girl?

No, I just looked at her. You were just like, oh, my God.

Wow, what is it?

What is that?

Yeah, it felt like someone who was explored... Like Christopher Columbus and I just landed on a new land. It was like, I just never... I was like, Oh, this is so different looking at her. What is this? Where am I? And then my babysitter gave me a ride to summer camp one time. This was when I was probably 10 or 11. And she reached over and put the seat belt on me. And it was the first time I'd had a woman, I think, to caringly do something for me, it felt like. And she turned on Bon Jovi. I was like, I just want her to play Bon Jovi a million times. I kept taking my seatbelt off, and she would put it back on. I was like, This is fucking living.

My seat belt came off again.

Yeah, dude. Oh, every time.

Just put your hand near my dick. Again, please bump up against it. I love it, dude.

That was pretty. So, yeah, some of that stuff. Yeah, all that young. I loved all of that energy, man. That shit was crazy. Yeah, dude, I'm trying to think of what other skills did you have before you started playing tunes and stuff?

Wait, I want to know about your first kiss.

Okay, my first kiss, dude, somebody. They had this girl in her neighborhood that had a bit of a chipped tooth. She looked like Lloyd Christmas, remember from that movie?

I don't know.

There he is right there, Lloyd Christmas. She had a little bit of that.

No way, dude.

He's got a real pitch. A full split? No, she's got a sandwich. No, zoom in more on that grill piece there, Daddy. See how it's got that sand wedge going?

The notch out?

Yeah. Got it. She had a little bit more of a pitching wedge. It was a little bit more there than Jim Carrey has here. But some kids locked us in a room and made us kiss each other.

Wait, wait, wait, wait. Some kids locked you two in a room.

And said, You guys better fucking kiss each other or you're not coming out. I think one of them called us Facts, where everyone was like, What? At least, I wanted to go, Well, all right, let us figure it out a little. But it was just fucking just older, mean kids during the summer, just bored.

Oh, no. So this is a bad experience.

It was bad. I didn't even think about that. It was bad. Oh, fuck. Then I think after that, I think, Oh, dude, I never thought about it. Yeah, after that, I was always I was so nervous around. I was super nervous around them. Oh, whoa. But you figure it out, and that's part of your deal. You know?

Yeah.

You figure it out, and that's part of your deal. Was it hard for you to be in love since your life was going that fast? What was that like?

Difficult because I just always say long distance, Love is just... It's extremely fucking difficult to keep a relationship when you're constantly fucking going. It's nearly impossible. To be successful at it for a few years here and a few years there is pretty rare.

Did you have any in your marriage? Because you've been married a few times. Yeah. Did you have any that you felt like you had to go back and make an amends to or something like that? Are you still good speaking terms with your ex-wives and stuff, or is it?

Yeah, well, I'm cool with all of them. We're cool. It's all good.

Did any of it happen so fast? You're like, Gee, I don't even know what happened. Because I can only imagine this, your life A lot of it just felt like it went so... Because it just... Things are going fast. My life sometimes gets a little fast. I'm like, I don't even know what's going on anymore.

Yeah. Yeah, shit flies, man. When you spend most of your time just hanging on, you're like, Dude, fuck, slow down. What is happening here? What were your parents like?

Were they pretty proud of you and stuff? Or what was that relationship like with them? Was it weird becoming famous and stuff? And then like...

You know what? They were super supportive. I guess I'm really lucky. Both of them were extremely fucking supportive. Go ahead.

No, I think... Yeah, because I think sometimes it's like... I don't know. Sometimes there's a weird thing about fame or popularity where it's like you almost feel like you don't belong to you or anyone anymore a little bit. Does that make any sense to you? There's so much you out there that you just belong to everybody.

Yeah. I don't know what I'm talking Yeah, no.

Fuck, man. We should have never talked. Neither of us knows what we're saying. Damn, dude.

Those guys are on some other shit, bro. They'll rewind and catch up later. Don't be the mustard, catch up.

Well, that's the fucking dumbest joke. That's awesome. I love that one. Don't be the mustard, catch up. Dude, my favorite joke I ever heard is, what's the last thing you want to hear when you're giving a blowjob to Willie Nelson? I'm not Willie Nelson.

Oh, dude. Oh, dude.

That'd be the fucking worst. What the fuck? That'd be the worst to be given a blowjob to Willie fucking Nelson, bro.

Dude.

And he's like, I'm not Willie Nelson. Who the fuck are you, dude?

Oh, my God. Jesus, dude.

Dude, what did I... Oh, I read somewhere that you used to do ballerining when you were young. Is that true? Yeah, dude. Do you remember it?

Tap dancing and ballet. I do remember it. And I mean, the shit was cool.

Tap dance is still pretty fucking cool, I think.

Tap dancing was fucking rad because you're essentially making fucking beats.

Yeah, you're basically drumming your feet.

It's rhythmic, and it was right up my alley. I loved it. And then my sister was taking ballet, and I went one time and I was like, and there's It's fucking loaded with fucking just beautiful girls. And immediately I'm like, Oh, I want to do this. So I dove right into both tap dancing and ballet. And then that day happened when it was like time for the big recital and your pictures in the paper, the local paper. And I'm in fucking tights dancing with this beautiful girl. Nobody saw that. And the next day at school, man, it was just like, Dude, what are you I'm like, What the fuck? And I quit. I quit dancing the fucking next day. I was just like, I couldn't handle the peer pressure. But I'm like, Wait a second. All my friends at school are calling telling me-But I got a check. Fucking gay. But I'm like, You all are fucking spanking each other in the locker room and whipping each other with towels. I don't know where you're getting the gay shit from because I'm here with these girls. This is what's happening over here. Fuck you guys.

I can't believe I quit. I let them fucking...Dictate.

It.oh, yeah. So many kids do.

But I couldn't handle It was peer pressure, man.

Dude, if you did it on ballet with a dip in, though, they would have fucking came around, I bet. That would have been it, dude. If you'd have put a fucking big third basement's chew in your mouth, dude, they'd have been like, This motherfucker's rocking, dude.

That's what I should have done.

It is so true. Yeah, it was like so much was dictated by what the neighborhood kids felt, man. The easiest thing for somebody to do is to call you a bitch, call you a f, call you a pussy, just something to shut you down. It's crazy. That's how so much of art gets really I'm really stymied. But I think in your condition, it seems like the rhythm found a way out of your fucking body. It was like, Oh, it's got to come out of here. Yeah, absolutely, man. Yeah, it's going to come out of my hands or my wiener eventually, too. Yeah, that thing even had a pay-per-view. But dude, I love this, bro. When I was a kid, you know what I used to watch, dude? I won't even lie about it. Shirley Temple movies, dude.

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Bro, I'll tell you the craziest story, dude. I went in, it It was like one of the first auditions I ever got when I got to LA. They're like, You need to sing a song for us, dude. No way. I swear to God, bro. I think I'd just been on something where I'd been watching some fucking S Temple, dude.

Dude, I got to see this.

You're like, No, no. I sang some song from something she did, and these people looked at me like, God, this is just something uncomfortable here. Even them, even they were liberal, probably, and they were closeted or recluseted or whatever. It had been like, they were probably whatever section.

It was an audition, right? Yeah.

And they're just like, We need you to sing now. Oh, dude. And I just sang a damn Shirley Temple song, dude.

No fucking way. What the hell are you auditioning for? Fuck if I knew, dude. If they're wanting you to sing.

And fuck them, bro. That's what you all get, bro. You all don't want to fuck with some real shit. You all ain't getting any more of it, So that's that, dude. But yeah, so you went in there, you think, also to meet the ladies, huh?

Oh, hands down. I went in and watched my sister, and in her class, I was just like, Oh, What am I doing? Why am I not here? I want to be doing this.

Yeah, dude. That's the best, man. Yeah. What about your first time having sex? Do you ever remembered it or no?

First, yes.

Was it exciting or scary, do you think?

It was both. Yeah, it was all. It was everything. All kinds of crazy shit.

Was it a surprise or was it planned?

Going down for the first time. I guess it was planned. It was with my next door neighbor.

Yeah, damn, dude, you didn't even... Brenda. You couldn't walk down the street without somebody trying to fuck you.

Oh, my God. God, dude. Brenda. Brenda. Wow. Yeah. I can say the first name, right?

Totally, dude.

It was in We're talking about my sister earlier. My sister's best friend, like best friend. I bring Brenda into... My dad built a room inside...

Like a bomb shelter or something?

Of the garage, a soundproof room where I could play drums. Really? And not bum him out.

Yeah, totally.

So I had this little box inside the garage, a little soundproof room, and it was like my fucking fort. And I was like, Man, I really like this check. I want to fucking bang this girl. So I brought her into my spot and turned the lights out.

Out? Was it completely dark?

Yeah. Wow. Completely dark. I don't know why, but...

Gosh, man. It's adventurous.

Yeah. And we're fucking going at it. There's all that weird shit that's happening. You're like, whoa, this feels crazy. What's happening? What's going on? All the The feelings are going. And my fucking sister walks in, and I'm fucking her best friend. And she just goes, and she runs and tells my mom and my parents.

Did they come in the room then?

Everybody's in trouble. We get put on restriction. We're not allowed to see each other. It was a great and terrible experience.

Because Romeo and Juliet, almost because you couldn't see each other anymore. Yeah.

We could see each other from our bedrooms. I'd just be like, Hey.

Hey. I'm a dreamer. Yeah, dude.

That song comes in. I I swear, out of a fucking movie.

I literally just came into my fuck just seeing the kids just waving. Yeah, dude.

Gosh. Yeah, it was both. It was all of it.

Yeah.

Do you remember your first?

Yeah, dude. I got caught into some bullshit in town. Oh, dude, the crazy. The first time I tried to get a BJ, right? So there was this girl who was doing DJs, right? And She was the funiest girl in town. She always made me laugh and stuff like that. And she and I liked each other. Oh, cool. But she had seen somebody else or something, and then she had started doing BJs. And then she liked me, and I was like, Oh, my God, dude, what if I'm the guy who gets a DJ amongst our people? I was like, I just don't even know if I can handle that. People being like, Yeah, it was the DJ or whatever. Oh, you're getting fucking I'm like, I'm not going to be your DJs now, you little pussy. Just shit like that. You know what I'm saying? You just can never win with humans, right? People suck. It's unbelievable. And so I remember It was some girl's birthday party, and we had planned to go meet behind a tree, right? And so she went over there, and the tree she picked, it was a pretty narrow tree, right?

And so I was going to receive the BJ right behind the tree, right? So we go back there, we're talking, and it's fucking so uncal. All my fucking blood is literally like... It's hiding from my penis. My blood is like, When do we go? Send us in. I'm just like, Stay up here. We got to talk. We're good. I'm scoping things out. It was like a dog fucking in the distance, just under a lamplight or whatever. And there's some kids you can hear playing games. It's a birthday. And then she just starts DJing me, dude. I'm so nervous, bro, because I always would get super nervous around women when I was young. And then the girl's mom comes out.

Oh, no.

The The tree wasn't that wide, and I could see what the mom was seeing. She was seeing me standing like this, and the girl low, but then the tree was blocking the actual act. And I just remember putting my fucking hands up like this and just looking at the mom. I didn't have anything to do, trying to be like, I don't have anything to do with it.

What does this mean?

I don't know.

I'm not doing anything.

Because I do like, these are the only She had two hands she could see. But it was that third hand, brother, that party hand, bro.Oh.

My God.

God.

Now, had you had sex before? This is your first sexual First sexual real encounter, dude.

I touched a girl's tits in the movies one time, watching that movie, Punkinhead. Remember that scary movie? No. It was called Punkinhead. It was real scary. Oh, boy. I touched a girl's breast, and she had very hard She always built like a fella, really, but pretty cute. Dude, some kid in Punkinhead got a hand job. Part of it ejaculated under my fucking arm. This kid Chad, when I was a kid, forgot about that.

No way. Yeah.

And he died in a car accident years later.

What the hell?

He was driving, dude. He was changing a CD out of his CD player. He put a CD into his mouth to put the other one in, and he fucking hit something.

And it just like, No fucking way.

Forgot all about that, man. It was crazy. But then I ended up having sex behind a bowl in an alley in our town a couple of years after that, three or four years later.

What happened? Okay, what happened?

Me and this girl, she had been having sex and stuff, and I wanted to have sex or whatever. And so we just tried to find a place we could meet up that was near where we lived. And we went back behind this bowl in an alley called Tiffany Lane. And it's closed for renovations right now. How do you know that? I was there not long ago.

Oh, shit.

And my buddy's Mary said- Return to the scene of the crime, dude. He said they're remodeling it. What the fuck? Yeah, there you go right there. Tiffany Laines. Look at the Google reviews. Got a Google reviews on there? Tiffany Laines. There you go, dude.

In Louisiana?

Yeah, pretty awesome, dude.

Whoa, dude.

Oh, I'm here because of the O'Van who lost something precious at this bowling so long ago.

Oh, my God, dude.

But that's crazy. So, yeah, I'm excited that they are redoing it. I'll go back. But, yes, kids were throwing rocks at us and stuff, too, dude. It was crazy. Wow. And so, yeah, it was hard to keep an erection with rocks coming, like rocks hitting off a sheet metal and stuff like that. But I was just so young that nothing could stop you.

Yeah.

And then I remember, yeah, I went into some girl's bedroom in my neighborhood, and she seemed like an adult because she smoked cigarettes. And she seemed like she was 40. She was one year older, but just because she smoked and she smelled cigarettes.

Older woman. Yeah.

And that was great. Then, yeah. But right when we started to hook up, I was so nervous, I couldn't get an erection. Then her mom, thankfully, came and busted in on us.

Oh, jeez.

She saved it. I was like, This has got to stop. I just yelled. I said what the mom was going to say. I thought maybe if I said what she was going to say, It was like it would adjust the dynamic or whatever. I was like, This has got to stop. I was like, I like this guy. I think that's where I was at.

Oh, my God.

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We thank Bluechew for sponsoring the podcast. Dude. I heard somewhere, and you can deny this, it doesn't matter either, but you would go on dates with women. You would get paid to go on dates with women. Yes. Was that a real thing that happened in your life?

Yes.

And do you have to have an overseer for that, a pimp or something for it?

There was this lady that was in our apartment complex. She was like a madame. She was running her thing. And, yeah, get paid to go out with these older women and just sit there and have dinner with them. Or if they wanted to fuck, do that, too. Did that for about a year or so, about a year or two.

Was there good money in it?

Yeah, it's crazy.

And that was in LA? I was a hooker.

Yeah? Kind of, I guess. Yeah.

Fuck, yeah, dude.

A male escort?

I don't know. Hooker is better.

What the fuck is a dip?

Hooker sounds like you don't have insurance, but you're still going to do it. You know what I'm saying? Mail escort sounds like you're at least applying for some government aid with it, I feel like. The one they refer to as a mail escort, Jiggle It says before the mail, it's going to refer to the Mail Escort, Jiggalo, applying for female customers, Rentboy Hustler. Do you remember any of the dates or not?

Yeah, sure.

Was it embarrassing or were you prideful about it?

If the lady was like an older lady where you're like, I hope this is just dinner, you're stoked.

You start coughing a little.

Yeah, I'm just going to have dinner and drinks and just entertain her.

Say my wiener is broken or something.

And that's it. Yeah, you'd get stoked when that would happen.

But sometimes they wanted more?

Yeah, and sometimes they wanted more, and you're like, Oh, man. That part's not fun because, I don't know, fucking when you're not into it. It's horrible. It's a weird thing.

Yeah, it's It's like when you have to dance at a wedding, but you know they're going to get divorced or whatever.

Oh, dude.

You're like, Oh. All right, I'll go out there. One song. Okay, fine.

Yeah, that's tough. Oh, my God. Dude.

Fuck, man. Sometimes did you get some hot chicks, though?

Yeah, sometimes. Sure. Yeah.

That's cool. Yeah, dude. One time there was a casting director, and I invited her to see It was a comedy show, right? Because I was like, Oh, she's going to maybe show. But she was also really cool. We hit it off. We were friends. But the place I invited her, I had the night wrong. And so she came anyway. And then so we're just... She's like, We walk upstairs to where the show is going to be. It was over on La Cienegro, La Brea, Room 5, this place is called. And it's not there. And I'm like, What? She came. And I'm like, I was like, Well, let me at least get you dinner. And so we sit downstairs, we're eating. She gives me half of a weed cookie. I never had a weed cookie before. So I ate it. And 20 minutes later, dude, I didn't know. I didn't know if this was my wife. I didn't know who this person was. I was like, Am I fucking married? And we're out to dinner right now, and it's our anniversary. I couldn't figure out what was going on. Wow. And I tried to kiss her.

What's that? I tried to kiss her. I'm having a beautiful time with you tonight or something. She's like, What in the fuck is What's going on?

Oh, my God.

I'm like, What, dude? Not your wife. That was horrible, bro. Then I laid in my bed for two days. I missed my birthday because I was so high, dude.

Jesus. That was bad. Oh, my God, dude.

When you all started traveling and getting drugs and stuff, was it hard to have sex on drugs, though? I don't see how you could do drugs and screw.

Yeah, I was with Like you said earlier, I'd end up just going back to my room, my hotel room, mostly by myself. Really? As soon as you start fucking doing cocaine, I'm like, I'd rather just party with me tonight. I don't have to listen to any bullshit. I don't have to lie. Just me and you are going to get... We're going to go really fast in this room and hang out.

You do that a The second...

Yeah, I'd rather just be by myself. Yeah.

I don't know what that is.

Yeah, I don't know.

I would get real self-conscious if I was doing coke around other people, too, I think. It wasn't fun that much for me. I knew I just wanted to do more coke. I didn't really want to hear about whatever was happening with your life that much.

Yeah. We call it lying powder because it was, let's get together and fucking sit around and lie to each other for a couple of hours. Why not? You're sitting there and you're doing blow with a bunch of people, and all of a sudden, you're making all these plans. Yeah, tomorrow, man, we're going to go on the fucking lake.

We're going to fucking water, wake forward, and fuck, whatever.

It never happens. Never. I don't want to get together and just lie to each other. I'd rather just go back to my room and fuck those chicks.

Another time in the future. Yeah. Yeah, dude. Oh, cocaine? Well, it'll make you give your email address to a dolphin, dude. It just fucking... You'll fucking tell him. You'll be like, Yeah, let's keep it. Let's holla at each other. We're going to fucking... And he's like, All right, dude. You bring your voice. I'll bring my voice. Email me. You're like, What is even cool? I'm In the morning? You're like, Who the fuck is this?Oh, my God. Stay away from me. God, that would be scary. How bad was it when addiction hit you guys as banned and stuff? Was that pretty crazy? Yeah, dude, when When you hear stories about it, you see in the documentaries and stuff, and you read about different stories of people going through it. And I know you've gone through it. Yeah. But was that one of the things that had the biggest effect on In a band?

Yeah. When you're looking around and you're seeing the guys in your band, everybody's this close from not waking up again. You know that shit? You've reached a level of doing crazy shit. When you're shooting I'm going to put one of your long, fucking Jack Daniels in your arm because you ran out of heroin when you could just drink the fucking Jack and be like, Oh, I'm just fucking drinking. We're out of heroin. But if we shoot it, it'll be fucking better. It's just alcohol. When you're doing dumb shit like that, we're like, I think someone's going to die here soon. We should all, and we did it as a band, we were like, we'd take handfuls of fucking halcions, they were called, and then we'd fucking go out for the night. But these are all fucking downers and sleeping pills. So who does that? We're doing such dumb, dangerous shit that everybody was like, All right, that's it. We're all going to do this together. It was like '89, we all went to fucking rehab. Together? Different rehabs, but But yeah.

Where'd you go? Which one?

I went to this place called Cottonwood.

Oh, in Tucson? Yeah, dude. Yeah, dude. Tucson is fucking retarded, dude. Shout out, Tucson, dude. I still live in Tucson.

Yeah, Tucson. It's right in the middle of nowhere, dude.

Raze, that's where I did my first Coke with those guys, with the oranges, dude. Yes. Bro, yeah. Tuso is the first place I saw a school bus. Somebody had cut the top off of it and was fucking driving it, dude.

That's on.

Bear down, dude, in the fucking desert, dude. Oh, yeah, bro. That's people... Oh, you'll do some coke and just eat somebody's ass through a dream catcher out there, dude. A lot of Zodiac killers and missing people out there, dude. You're praying to see the next street light out there because sometimes it's like far distance between the street lights out there. Was that scary the first time you went or what was that like? Are you like, I got to be here?

Yeah, I know. I'm sure it's very different to someone who doesn't want to be there. Everybody wanted to.

You're like, the only way we can do it is to actually go somewhere.

Yeah, to actually go somewhere. And if we all do it together, our chances of fucking survival are going to be a lot better. Sometimes you just need a fucking bro to be doing it with you. Oh, yeah. So all of us did it together, and we were like, oh, fuck, we can pull this. We can do anything.

It's cool. And was it fancy? Was it a fancier one?

No, it's just a regular rehab.

It's one cool thing about rehab. You can go to them, and it's just a mix of all types of people.

Fucking wild, right?

Oh, they're totally wild. I went to just-You're hearing other people's stories going like, Maybe I'm not that bad.

You're talking yourself into fucking bail and rehab.

Fuck.

These people are fucked up. Let me out of here.

You're like, I could be mayor in a month. Fuck.

We haven't even got the family day yet. This is nuts.

Yeah, having a bro in it is the biggest thing, man. I got a couple of buddies in Nashville and here, too. It's like having some boys in, and it's like just you can check in with each other. You keep rocking for each other. And being sober is nice. It's nice, but it's hard. Yeah.

Man, it is It is really nice, man. Everything just is so much fucking easier and so much, I don't know, just less drama, dude. Less drama.

Yeah, and you can just wake up and be like, Okay, I can do this today. Yeah. If you're not having to sleep in, hide, pray for Gatorade or whatever.

Pray for Gatorade.

God, dude. All that shit was the worst.

Oh, my God.

Was there ever a show where you guys just couldn't even go on because you were too fucked up or no?

No, never.

That's unbelievable to me.

Yeah, that is pretty wild because we'd get pretty fucked up before the show. But not fucked up enough to where you couldn't fucking bring it. Because I don't know.

Well, you all songs, that's one thing I was thinking about was you guys, this music was high energy. So it was like some groups, there's different, but you guys were... I mean, Every one, it almost starts out with the rift, even some of the ballads. So you're like, God, you had to be able to show up for it.

Yeah, especially drumming, dude. That shit's so fucking physical. If you are feeling, or if you're fucked up. If drums, it just doesn't work. Really? It just doesn't work. You're the fucking heartbeat of the machine. And if you are fucked up, this whole program is fucked up. Yeah. You have to keep it together enough. There's times where you had a little too much, and you're thinking, Oh, man, I'm fucking smoking right now. I'm crushing the shit. And you fucking watch a videotape back and you're like, What? What the fuck was that, dude? Okay, now you know you can't do that because that's fucked up. But you're thinking you're just murdering. Yeah. That's happened a few times, and then you go, okay.

That doesn't work. Yeah, that doesn't work. Yeah. Yeah, because in the dirt, there's a lot of stuff where you guys are just partying so hard. I mean, obviously, they do that for cameras or for films and to make it look cool. But did you feel cool about the dirt?

Dude, I was so pumped because it's so raw and so fucking real. I can't believe they smashed everything into an hour and a half. That's a lot.

Yeah, they should have made it 10 episodes.

It could have been a fucking mini-series. But to get that amount of stuff in there, is just beyond. And it was fucking awesome. I loved it, man. Yeah. It's really well.

Mgk crushed it as you, too. He played you, didn't he? Yeah. Yeah. He did a great job.

He did, dude. He was so fucking... He He's so-I don't think you got enough credit for that, really, when I think back on that. He did a great job. He did an unbelievable job. I've never seen somebody take so much... I've known him for a while, and he calls me up and he goes, Bro, I got the fucking part. I'm like, What are you talking about? He goes, Dude, I'm fucking playing you. I go, What? He goes, Yeah, dude. He goes, I I got the fucking script. I'm coming over, and we're going to go through this bitch line by line. And I want to know how shit really happened because I got to pull this off, and I want it to I want to make you proud. I want to fucking murder this shit. That's cool. It's just such a trip because we're the same build, the same fucking lanky, goofy, fucking... And And he came over, dude, and we spent hours, hours, days, going over everything because he wanted to fucking rip it. He was like, I got to fucking nail this.

And he did.

Yeah, he fucking killed it.

Yeah. I remember there being moments I'd be like, damn, that's Mgk, and he's fucking killing it. Only every now and then would you think that it was him.

Yeah.

Yeah, I guess films and stuff like that, Yeah, that's hard to do, to put everything in in 90 minutes. Is it hard for you to even remember some of what went on?

You know what? Yes. And that movie was about the book, and the dirt book.

They said it was pretty true to form a lot of it, I think.

Yes, it's identical. But to answer your question, I didn't... Thank God the other guys remembered shit, and vice versa. We all like, reminded each other of things because shit's fuzzy for me about this or that time. Depending on what people were going through at the time, people remember or don't quite remember. So it was really that process of writing the book individually. Everybody did their interviews, and later you find out, oh, fuck, that's right. That's a cool feeling. Yeah, it's cool.

It's Yeah, it's almost like a time capsule.

Yeah.

And it's neat to have somebody else there to help you remember, too. Yes. That's really a cool gift of it because it's so hard to sometimes just...

Yeah. Yeah. There's so much that has happened. It would be almost impossible, especially for us fucking retards to remember all of it.

Come on.Unbelievable. Yeah. And a lot of it, a touring life is you just get ready enough to walk on a stage the next month. You Yeah. It's not a ton to it, really. It's like you go somewhere, maybe you go out to eat if you're there for two days. Yeah, maybe. Yeah. Or you go see one thing if you're in the town the next day. If you're in Cleveland, you go to the Rock Hall of Famer, you go do something. But otherwise, it's just You're just getting yourself acclimated, just whatever you have to do to get yourself ready to get on stage.

Yeah. And then you're out. Yeah. That's so weird, dude. I tell people all the time. I go, I've been around the world a fucking hundred times, and I've seen nothing. That's crazy. Literally.

Like a meteor, really. It hasn't landed. Yeah.

Every fucking arena, stadium, bus, hotel room. That's pretty much it.

Yeah. Frankfurt, what? Rotterdam? Yeah, you're like, Oslo.

Arena with a building with a lot of seats in it and a lot of people and repeat that a bunch of places. And you're like, I I really haven't seen much.

When you started to get more free time.

When you think about it like, I've seen nothing, honestly.

Oh, sometimes one of my dreams is to get married and have a wife and get a camper and just go around and see even places where I've been. Here's the thing. There's no way you can't sound like the dumbest fucking person of your wife. But you were here, you're like, Yeah, I was. You were here already?

Yeah. No, but that's I'll do that on the tour bus on a day off. I refuse to fucking go to a hotel. I'm like, we're taking the bus and we're going to a Lake and we're fucking spending the... You get the fucking barbecues out. We're going to have something different. We're going to break the repetition here and go see something.

And live, be human. Yeah. It's funny. You give your... Once you become busy enough, you become the business. You know? Yeah. And a part of being you, you almost get so little time to be yourself. Does that make any sense, man?

You just nailed it. Yeah, man, you just fucking nailed it.

Sometimes I even miss myself, which is fucking really weird.

That's a good thing, man.

I mean-It's good to be successful. No, it's good to have the opportunities. It's a blessing for sure.

It's cool that you're connected enough to realize that you miss yourself, even miss yourself. You're like, Fuck, man.

Which It's all interesting. The most interesting thing is just to be able to have the experience of what it's like to have some popularity or to be in certain spaces. It's just to even be a fly because you're a fly on the wall, but you're you, and you're like, Oh, this is just interesting to be here.

Yeah, definitely.

Was it hard? Because I know you got a couple of children. You have two.

I got two boys.

Two boys. And was it hard to decide to start a family when your life was like, when you have such a light?

Was it No, I always wanted one, man. I've always been that like, fucking sucker for romance, having a family, that whole milk and cookies thing. I've always liked. So, yeah, it was something that I definitely wanted.

Did it just become a certain age? You're like, I have to do it now. Did the clock ever start to for you a little? Did you ever feel like?

I don't know. I think maybe. I think it was just right place, right time. A lot of things have to be right for that to happen. But Just happy it happened, man.

Yeah, that's a good point, too.

I got some fucking amazing boys who are just a dream, man.

What's Something neat about each one of your kids that you really admire?

Something neat about them?

Or something that you admire about each one of them.

They have some incredible resilience. They're brought up, and it's in a lot of not normal situations for them, and they've done really fucking well with just navigating. They're great.

How How are they different than each other? I think I met one of them.

Dylan is the youngest on the right. I've called him Little Buddha since he's born. That's cool. He's just like The reverse of his brother, who's more like me, Brandon.

Yeah, you can tell.

Yeah. The dude flipping the camera off, that guy.

I'll be sponsoring him in a couple of years.

He's more hyper and crazy like me. So they're completely opposite, which is great because I got one of each.

Yeah, you got a yin and yang going. Yeah, dude. That's cool. Is it really cool being a dad? What was something about it that really surprised you, you think, over time since you've had the experience?

I don't think there's a better feeling in the world. As a matter of fact, I know there isn't. Of having your kids musically. Okay, just imagine a musician like myself, and all of a sudden I'm in the studio working on a song with my son, and that's going down. And my other son, who loves music as well. Everybody's just like, everybody's in the mix. And I'm like, I'm going to start fucking crying right now because this is the coolest shit fucking ever. Oh, it's cool. Ever. Like, dude, you know what I mean? Yeah, I can feel it. When your kids grow up, they're just some are nothing like their parents and others are. But to have them both just really gravitate towards music and acting Brandon has been doing is just... There's nothing better. You know what I mean?

I bet, especially if that... Because that's almost all the things you love right there in one space, music and your two sons. Yes. To have that mixed together, that would be super cool.

It's insane, man. And then, and they were sitting there. Yeah, it's incredible.

Well, yeah, I mean, you were... I mean, you sing on some songs, but you weren't the lead singer, huh? Vince is the lead singer. You guys are the band.

Yeah, Vince sing.

But some songs you sing on.

Yeah, I sing. I mean, I typically sing. I play guitar, piano, drums, produce.

How How much pressure do you realize over time? How much extra pressure is on a lead singer?

A lot. That's not easy, man. It's not easy.

Because they have to do almost extra work a lot of times, it feels like, too.

Taking care of the shit. And if you're doing it every night, it's a muscle. You got to take care of it.

Yeah. What else in that? I'm trying to think of the... What about the part in the dirt where Osi snorts that piss? Is that true? Or they just made that up?

Full on I know. Fuck, yeah. I know people ask that all the time. They're like, Dude, really? I'm like, Absofucking lootley. You can't make that shit up.

Yeah. To rip a line of fucking piss. There's my buddy Tony Cavalero that played him, dude.

Dude, he was so high. Yeah.

Oh, Osi was?

All of us right here We had just been on an overnight bus ride, and Aussie rode with us. And we're doing rails the whole way. No one slept. Everyone just drink. We're at the hotel, and no one wanted to go to their room. Everyone wanted to still keep partying. So we go, Let's go to the fucking pool. We go to the pool. At that time, it It's just a thing. Everybody was into out rock star and out grossing somebody out, out partying. You know like, No, dude. So Aussie starts. Aussie's wasted. He sees there's a little trail of ants going all the way to this kid popsicle that he left on the ground, right? Yeah. And Aussie looks down and fucking just snorts the whole the line of ants going to the popsicle. And Nicki's like, Okay, well, fuck that. So Nicki pulls his dick out at the pool. Everybody's this hotel. This is like the Four Seasons, I think, in Dallas. Some fucked up people, kids, everything. Nicki goes, I fucked up. Watch this. Nicki goes to pee on the ground, and Nicki's going to lick up his own piss to like, outdo Osi.

Oh, yeah, you got to recycling.

And before Nicki could do it, Osi fucking beats him to it and licks up his piss. And then we're like, All right, Osi, you win. You win, dude. Nap time.Yeah. That's awesome. What they don't show in the movie there is Aussie's tour manager goes, Dude, Aussie's fucking on one. You're responsible for him. Here's his hotel room key. Fuck, I'm done. I can't deal with this anymore. I'm like, I got him. Cool. I'll take him to his room. So anyway, after we get kicked out of the pool area for all that bullshit, they don't really go into it in the movie. I'm like, Come on, Ozzie, we got to get kicked out. I'm going to take you up to your room. He goes, All right, mate. I put him. We get in the elevator, we're going up, and there's people in the fucking elevator, and he pulls his pants down, and he just starts fucking...

Are you going to shit?

He's shitting. I'm like, Ozzie, dude, no, fuck.

Don't shit.

Dude, no. We get to the floor. I'm like, Come on. I'm just trying to get him to his fucking room, close the door, and let him... He just needs to go to bed. Yeah. So I take his room key, fucking open it up, push the door open. I'm like, Okay, buddy. See you later. And he goes, Come here. I'm like, I'm going to go. He's like, No, you come here. I go in, and now he's going to finish. He just starts shitting in the middle of the room. Oh, wow. Bends down, picks it up, and starts painting the walls with his shit. I'm like, I got to go, I fucking bailed. I don't know what happened after that, but they don't show that part in the movie. Just like, he had to shit.

Yeah, but if you got to shit, you got to find other ways to...

Like, bro, just wait till you get to the toilet.

Yeah, that's the best way.

Yeah, but he wanted to... Everybody was just on this like, I got to out.

Yeah, fucking whatever. I'm an animal.

I'm going to paint with my shit. Yeah.

Yeah, everybody's fucking-I'm an animal. Yeah. Everybody's fucking Pablo shit, Casa all of a That's wicked, dude.

Dude, I got to piss.

You do? Yeah. Go piss real quick. It's tough, man. It's weird because sometimes you don't really pick who you love, I feel like. You can have an idea of like, Oh, I'm going to be in love with this, or this girl looks this way, or in that, so I'm attracted. But then sometimes it's like, you'll just be in love with something. You're like, Oh, I'm in love over here. Yeah. Does that make any sense, you think?

The first thing that comes to mind is best friendship. I think that has to happen before the love. For me, it's like, I don't know.

What I think is best, you learn that as we get older, sometimes some of that stuff we learn as we grow, too. Yeah. I'd make choices before. Sometimes in my life, you'll be like, Oh, this and this. But you have to have a best friend that you're like, All right, every now and then, you're like, All right, I'll fuck my best friend. You know? But if it's just a best friend, then after a while, you're like, Oh, fuck. I got to get rid of this best friend so I can fuck a little. I think so. It's like you got to find that middle ground. I think. Because you've been married a few times in your life. Yeah. Now you're married now to a comedian, Brittany Furland. That's your wife?

Yes.

She's always charming. She made this necklace for me, too, speaking of charms. Yeah. This is a little Marlborough. It's cool, man.

It feels good. Yeah, she's fucking rad. She's funny. Yeah. Dude, I got my face hurts. We're just... And that's the best friend shit I'm talking about. We've laughed all the fucking time because we're both silly. We don't take everything so fucking Seriously. I don't know. We just have fucking fun, and that's a beautiful thing.

What's the longest relationship that you've been in?

Right now, I think it might be me and Brittany because we're just clocking in it over seven years. Jesus, really? Yeah, and the longest time I was ever married was for seven years. So we're past that now. Which is wild, man. I'm like, okay, this is definitely-It's a real thing. Third time's the charm. Here comes that silly line.

And how many times are you been married? Fuck.

Well, technically four. Sorry, technically three, but four times. The first one got annulled, so that doesn't count.

What does annulled mean? What people just disagree or the ref says no or whatever?

I guess it's like the ref says no. We just weren't married long enough. It was literally, I think maybe a couple of weeks after getting married, it was like, this ain't working.

Yeah. They should have a thing where a month later, your friends get to send a ballot, and it's like, something like that.

So your friends can call it, too? Now, she ain't cool, man. She got to go. She just took my best friend. Yeah. Because your friends, a lot of them go.

Yeah, they disappear.

Yeah, they just disappear.

Once they get married.

Yeah. And if you get married to somebody they don't like. Yeah, and that. Yeah. Wow. You know how that works.

Have you ever been married? No, I've never been married. I want to get married, though. Do you? I think my career started booming late in life or later. And so it's been like...

No time for that right now.

It's just been hard. It's tough to even tell girls. It's like, right now, or if there's something that starts to build, and then I'm out of town, and then I come back in town, and like, Now, where were we? Then you start to feel bad that people are holding out hopes, and you're the one who's like, you don't want to keep somebody's hopes up.

Fucking.

It's like, fuck, I got too much. I know. Then you just feel like you're... I don't want to keep... You'll get a little bit attached. You're like, yeah, this is going good. But then you're out of town. It's like, well, I know I'm going to be out of town pretty much a lot for the next year. So I just have to tell you right now that this is just how things are. And if we don't both work pretty hard at this, then it's going to be tough.

Yeah, dude. It's going to be tough. The reality.

And love, I think there's love. It's a hands-on fucking thing.

Yeah, it's work. I mean, you have to nurture.

It's a bonsai.

It's funny. Our therapist says that all the time. All that work that you put on those trees, that same work It goes into your partner.

Yeah, because it's funny. Even when you and Brittany came in today, it seems like, and I've seen you guys at the Comedy Clubs and stuff together, it really does seem like you guys enjoy being around each other. It seems funny. You guys are fucking, yeah, like, goopy. She has a lot of energy, and it's nice, probably then, too, because you've had so much energy in your life where it's like, you don't have to always be the voltage.

Well-perceived, dude.

It's nice.

Go crazy, baby. Go crazy.

You're like, This is the part of me that's just... It's still there, but it's just fucking... It's had a lot of damage.

You can entertain me, sure.

Yeah, I had to outsource some of it. I found a part of me that I really like in someone else, and that's really cool. That's more of a neat way to say it.

Yeah, it is cool, man. It is beautiful.

That's awesome, dude.

I think I finally got it right, dude.

Yeah. Yeah.

Good. Actually, I know we got it right.

Cool.

It's good.

That's cool, man.

It feels nice to say that.

Did you ever get to meet Michael Landon before or no?

No. Little House on the Prairie guy?

Yeah. No. He got all the ladies, bro, I heard.

Yeah, he had a sick ass or did have a sick ass house in Malibu, back in the cut Malibu. I don't know what you call that area. Some gated...

What about Michael Jackson? Do you ever get to meet him?

I did. Really? One time, dude, at the MTV Awards. I was presenting-What was it, 2007?

No. Was it 2007 or was it earlier than that? You've been to a bunch of them.

Yeah. Man, the date's fuzzy. But dude, I met him once, man, and I was so bugged out.

The date's fuzzy. That should be the Tommy Lee, the title of your autobiography.What?The Dates Fuzzie. The Dates Fuzzie. Because it pertains to just a timeline and dating and everything. But anyway, what am I fucking scripting your life? I'm not writing that shit.

And the fact that I'm geographically challenged, I still don't know where the fuck... I was trying to tell somebody, Where were you this week? I was like, I was in Why not? South Dakota, North Dakota? Fuck, I don't know. I'll break down in tears at the airport sometimes just because I'm like, I don't know where I'm at. Because if I travel alone, especially because I'm used to a fucking tour manager. Okay, we go here, we go there. And man, dude, I can't tell you, there's several times where I've been traveling alone, where I'll just stop and grown man just start crying. Yeah. Fuck. Fuck. Where's a smoking lounge?

It is true. I mean, part of having that much people around you and support and stuff, you turn into a little bit of a child that does an activity. Dude. That is it.

Absolutely.

You're like, Get this fucking child to the stage, have him do his activity. Do his activity. Then he's going to ask, Where's dinner?Dude. Where do I sleep?

I just learned how to send a fucking FedEx package a few years ago. I didn't know how to do it. I look, What do you do? Does FedEx... Where is FedEx? Do I take it there? How does it work?

Do they know you want to send something like, How does this all fill in?

Dude, just because everybody does everything for you for so long and through all those... Fuck.

And some of it, the way that some of that gets set up, it's not you necessarily outsourcing your life. It's that those things get put in place around you so you don't have to worry about that or worry about anything because part of the business is you are the business, and so you have to be the business. You don't have to be the mail room of the business, and that starts to fall on somebody else's shoulders. It's not like you saying, Oh, I'm not going to send my own mail. Yeah, no. It's just that's the way things work out.

Yeah. Isn't that bizarre? The whole time, you don't learn anything. You're just relearning things that I should have learned a long time ago. Oh, whoa, dude.

I'm a late bloomer, dude. I'm like, I'm learning shit I should have learned at five or six years old. How to do proper handshakes. I was such a late learner on so many things. I'm like, dude.

Oh, fuck.

It was just a fucking nightmare. Well, have you and your wife taken a lot of trips?

We have. She doesn't like to go on a lot of trips, but we have taken a lot.

Actually-is there a place you guys like to go?

She's terrified of fucking going anywhere. She fucking had... Like, a dude, I've scheduled or booked just the most beautiful fucking spots, like winter fucking cabins on a lake, and had to cancel them because there's no hospital within a couple hours. Yeah. That shit or remote, Bora-bora, or just beautiful places we've gone to. But some had to cancel, but trying to get her to go anywhere is really difficult. But But we have.

Well, it's nice. Also, if you're having a good time, just to be at home, too.

We're building a house right now and been working on it for three years. Oh, that's awesome. We've built a place that doesn't require vacations. I'm making my house so fucking rad that I don't really need to go anywhere. Yeah. And for her, too, she's going to never have to go anywhere because she'll be like, Oh, This is fucking rad. This is sick as shit ever.

Where's the front desk?

I'm on vacation.

Yeah, that's sick.

Yeah.

Oh, that's a neat idea.

Hopefully, I've fixed that problem for her because she doesn't dig traveling at all.

Wow. It's nice. It probably saves you some loot, too.

Yeah, maybe.

Do you guys keep animals at the house? Have you been an animal guy?

Yeah, dude. I've been a dog guy for a long time. We got two Wieners.

How big is the wiener, though?

Like little. A wiener, about this little. All right. I don't know if it's the camera. About this little, about that thick.

If you had to compare it to your actual Wiener who wins, you'd say?

To an actual wiener?

To your actual wiener. You're the guy with the wiener. The rest of us are just milling around the area. You know what I'm saying? The rest of us are just loitering, dude. You're the fucking fire truck. We're the guy running with the pale of water. You know what I'm not even saying so. Oh, damn. Now, this shit is getting a little... Look at how little. That shit's beautiful. It's getting a little crazy, dude.

That's Tiny the Wiener.

Where was this at, dude? Was this at a P. F. Chang's, dude? Where is this?

That's at my old house in Calabasis.

Oh, that is pretty cute.

Yeah, we must have just got her. Oh, yeah, you can tell. She's a little bit bigger now. I think you saw her earlier. Yeah. Oh, wow. Yeah. She's teeny, dude.

Very illegal, but also cute.

Yeah, so fucking cute.

Yeah, little dogs is nice. Do you ever own a parrot? Any other animals?

We've had a couple of birds. Haven had great luck with birds. Yeah.

One time, I went to Vietnam, right? And so you go there, I was a student, and you get dropped off. And the taxis, whenever you show up there, the first place they take you, you could say anything. I want to go to this. I want to go to a museum. I want to go to the- Where was this? In Vietnam.

Oh, you've been there? Yeah.

So you go and you said the first thing. I was a student and we were like, We want to go to this museum, whatever, this something. But no matter where you say, they take you to hookers or whatever. You can say anyone. When you go to McDonald's, they take you to fucking make pussies, right? We got it. Yeah. So we fucking get out at this museum. It's one story, and it's a pet shop. We're like, What the fuck is it? Everybody speaks yet to me, so you don't know what's going on. I walk inside, a couple of birds, a couple of, I don't know, it was cats or whatever. It was vague. And then these ladies come out of the back and topless, right? So we're like, Oh, what the fuck?Look at Pet Shop.Topless Pet Shop? Yeah, dude. It's like, damn, dude. Yeah, that B-Shon ate that lady's bra. So next thing we're in the back and they're trying to jerk everybody off and just get seed out of everybody. Jesus. And I got super nervous because they had us all in the same room and I was like, I don't even speak of the language.

I'm like, looking at they have a picture menu. I'm like, looking at that and trying to negotiate rates or whatever. Yeah, dude. I will get 30% off some fucking tits if I can. I'm like, trying to see what the different offices are. Anyway, I get really freaked out because one of my buddies starts getting a blow job. It's just all right. It's just right there, and it's crazy. You can hear the animals.

Oh, dude.

It's just really crazy. One of the parents kept saying pervy shit, like, Fuck, person.

We're like, Come, come.Oh, no.Come, papa.Oh.

My God.It was just like, What the fuck is it, man? But I've never really been a pet owner, I guess. That's the closest thing I've really been a part of. Except if I slept in the bed with a girl one time in a Great Dane.

Oh, shit.

Yeah, and she made it sleep right between us, and I was like, This feels gay, dude. He was big, dude, and black, too.

Yeah, they're fucking people-size. Look at that, dude.

He was big. He definitely played Juco Ball somewhere. This thing was fucking huge.

They take horse-size shits.

Yeah, I'm not dealing with that. They're giant.

No, dude, that ain't cool.

What was the first pet you ever had?

First pet was a monkey. My dad brought a monkey from Thailand.

Wow.

Yeah, that's the first pet.

And was it in a A box or how did you all keep it?

It was outside in a cage. My dad, he built the cage. He fucking just built everything. He built a cage, and that's where he lived. But that's where he'd sleep at night, but he basically had little diapers on and would just fucking rip it around the house all day. And he'd party. Oh, dude. Wow. Party.

Maybe that's where you learn some of it. Yeah, the fuck. This thing can fucking rock.

Yeah, so fun. So fun, man.

And how did it pass away?

It had a heat lamp outside, and we had a fucking... It got really, really cold, and we had a power outage, and the fucking heat lamp went off, and in the morning, he was dead. I think we had like... He froze. I don't know how he died, but we had really shitty, super cold weather. I think it actually even maybe snowed.

What town was it in?

In Covina.

Oh, out here?

Yeah, that's where I grew up. Wow.

Damn, it's a bummer. Yeah. Dude, 99 out of 100 times, you think a monkey would survive a night in Covina?

Yeah. I mean, it's not extreme here at all.

I That's crazy. Yeah. Yeah. My apartment is on the street where... Who was the guy from Jane's Addiction? The guy who wears the makeup, handsome guy. Dave Navarro? Yeah. Where his mom got murdered on the same street.

Oh, shit.

It was crazy. Oh, whoa.

You lived there?

I lived just down the street from there.Oh.Yeah. Oh, whoa. Cool. Dude, who else? One time, I went to Perry Farrell's house for a one-year-old's birthday. Somebody fucking invited. Really? Yeah. It was just there. And I'm just walking around, and then there he shows up. It was just sometimes nice houses to let people, friends, have their birthday party, kids' birthdays there. I fucking relapsed at a one-year-old's birthday party, dude.Oh.

My God.

A one-year-old.What the fuck, dude?What?Yeah, bro.

Hey, look, man. How does that even happen?

God is good, dude. I don't know how it happens, but we just keep it moving, and it was what it was, man. I didn't expect to. That's why I went. I was like, Oh, I'm going to go to a place I can't get in. And then you have a couple of wines or whatever, and then it's just warm. It was just bad.

At a one-year-old birthday party. Dude.

Did you ever get to meet Marilyn Manson?

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, it's cool.

Yeah.

That was my first concert.

He's a fucking great guy.

Yeah, I hear really interesting things about him. Kat Von D is close with him, and she speaks a lot about him. Yeah. Or she mentions him a lot.

Yeah, he's a fucking... He's funny, man.

Was there... Oh, that's you and him. Oh, yeah. Oh, that's cool. He has a good sense of humor?

Oh, yeah, dude. He's definitely a fucking tweaker.

Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah.

He's actually-B-Y-O blinds, huh?

Yeah, he's fucking wild. He turned me on to some fucking, man, this It was crazy. We drank a fucking shitload of this absent in Europe, his thing was absent, and showed me, I don't know, I'd seen this shit called Green Faerie or whatever. It's green. But he had some other... I started hallucinating on the shit. If you drink enough of it, you start to slightly hallucinate. And it was purple colored.

And it's an alcohol as well?

Yeah, it's full on alcohol, strong as fuck. Yeah. And you drink the shit on fire, like you light the sugar cubes, the sugar melts into the absent. It's a whole like a ritual thing.

Yeah. Ritualistic. I like that. Yeah, it's dark. I could see him getting into some ritualistic shit.

Yeah.

His Absinthe really make you hallucinate. Absent, a liqueur, is a combination of spirits and herbs, mainly phenol, anis, and a type of warm wood called Artemisia absintheum. That's what it's named. After Van Gogh and Picasso were big fans of Absinthe back in the day, along with other artists, some believe that absent the induced hallucinations partly inspired some of their greatest works.

Wow.

Do you look at bands nowadays? Because you guys fucking rock. You guys were almost like the industrial era. It's back when you actually had to actually make the fucking sounds. Now, it's like you don't have to make the sounds anymore. The sounds are all programmed or whatever. You guys had to actually fucking go out there and make them.

Make them, record them. Do you look Band.

I mean, you look at band... I mean, you look at N. Sayer, Rascal fight. You're like, what the fuck is even going on here? Not them, specifically. But do you ever look at Modern Band? You're like, this is...

Yeah, I hear it all the time.

Are you disappointed in how music has evolved or it's just this is what it is, and it's like you're fortunate the time you got to be in. Do you ever get jealous of the time that people have? Not that you're still not making a lot of music, but it's like, you guys are still the ones, let's go out there and fucking...

Yeah. You know what, dude? I guess the good thing is I'm such a fan of so many styles of music that I enjoy all of it. So whether you make it raw and live off the floor or make beats or record in the box in the computer and edit. I've done it all different ways. So I just like good music. I don't really care how it was made. So, yeah, it doesn't bug me. I don't go like, That shit today sucks. Because there's some really great stuff, and there's some shitty stuff. But I do like so many different styles. I'm all over the place. I'm probably not a good guy to ask that question to because I don't know.

Are there things that you miss about the rise of things, like when things were starting? Because sometimes you don't realize when things are popping in the beginning, that that's the moment.

You know what I miss more than anything, dude? I miss the fucking mystery, man. I miss the... There's people that I absolutely just think the fucking world of. And it's guys who are like, I think they're chameleons because they're always changing. Guys like Prince never did fucking interviews. You always wonder, what's that guy do? The Mystique, I miss that. Now we're just like, we know everything about fucking everybody's lives, whether you want to or not. And there's just no, there's no fucking mystery, man. And that's a big part, I think, of any art is the mystery of it. What did that motherfucker eat in the morning? Or what? Just like, what? All the question marks are gone, and you don't see that in new music. I'm not sitting here going like, Fuck, I got to get down to Tower Records and wait fucking overnight for this record to drop. That just...

God. Oh, that was so true. It was like, well, even looking back on those magazines and stuff, that's how we knew little pieces of shit. It was like, Sebastian Bach's head was fucking bleeding. He had no idea why. He didn't know where the picture was. And they told you to blurt, but you're like, Fuck, dude.

And it's a still picture. It's not a video. No. Documentary on the whole thing.

You're like, Fuck, dude. We got to see him when he comes here. We're like, What is going on?

And then you start making shit up in your That's where-That's where creation came from.

That's where creativity came from. Yes.

You came up with how it may have happened.

Dude, in waiting outside to get tickets to something, dude, whether it was to go see the crew, whether it was to go see Guns N Roses, Dio, Lock Up The Wolf, whether it was to go see fucking 311. You'd have to wait out all night, right? And thankfully, some kid would bring his 11-year-old brother, and people would get him fucked up for the first time in the parking lot. Yeah. You just be watching this fucking little fat kid take off his shirt and fucking eat bugs and shit.

Oh, my God, dude.

That would get you from 2:00 to 4:00, and then somebody would go to the Donut place, and then it would be 6:00, and then open at 9:00. You hold the line. Yes, hold the line, dude. There was still only five people out there, and it would have been fine if you came at 9:00 AM, but not, motherfucker. We waited all night for tickets. That was something to be said. It was like a badge of honor. Yes. You didn't know what happened. Even when I saw Manten and Twiggy Ramirez, I think one of them, he cut the other guy's stomach or opened a bottle. The ambulances came, took the guy out of there.

What just happened?

Dude, yeah, I remember being in the bathroom. I was 14 years old. Some guy goes, How old are these kids in here? Somebody goes, I don't know. They look like they're about 14. Somebody's like, Somebody's going to touch them tonight. Somebody said that. We never even heard that before. What is going on? But they took They took whoever he caught with the box, and we had no idea what happened. It's just your imagination. Where the fuck is he?

Yes, dude. I missed that. I missed that, man.

I missed it. It was It's a possibility.

The other thing, along with the mystery, is I wish there was less because there's so much. Dude, I'm a fucking musician. I'm in this business, and If I can't keep up, how the fuck is just a fan who's not a musician, or just a fan of music, keep up? If I can't, dude, there's so much fucking music. Fucking, dude, there is so much fucking music. It is insane. Your neck would snap off. It's just like, how do... I feel bad for young people. How do they find music? It's just like, Fuck. It's too much, dude. There's no place to... I mean, I guess that must... Maybe it's the opposite. Maybe there's the thrill of that hunt of trying to find something in the barrage that you're like, Dude, I found this out there. Maybe it's reverse, and I shouldn't feel bad for people, but there's too Too much. Too much. Too much.

Was there a band that you loved that fell off or that had a singer pass away? Was there anything, was there something in your time, a group that you really missed?

Oh, fuck, man. A few. Fuck. Nervana.

Oh, yeah. Did you guys know them or not?

Didn't know them as Nervana.

Just knew the music?

Just knew the music, yeah. And later, become friends with Dave and stuff like that.

Oh, yeah. I just read his book recently.

But yeah. It's cool. And fucking Soundgarden. Yeah. Fuck. There's been so many... They were a real big influence on me. Fuck.

Soundgarden, dude.

Fucking Allison Chains. Dude, there's been so many great fucking... Man, man. In the box. Dude, that was good. Yeah, bro.

When those things came on, when that shit happened, there was something about being real. It was just like there was this party that started a fucking purr, dude.

Acdc, Bon Scott. There's another fucking great one. Dude, nobody sounds like that guy. Uh-uh. So, yes, there's been a-ACDC, back in black. Yeah. Fuck, yeah.

God, dude. Bro, this dude in our neighborhood, this dude, Eddie, he got a 5.0 fucking Mustang, right? I remember he put two of the most busted chicks who were also the best-looking girls in our neighborhood in it. Yeah. He made them sit on the back, open. He'd sit on the back trunk, but with their legs inside, right? He would just drive around town like it was a parade. No way. Just because somebody finally had a car and somebody finally had two chicks in it, right? I got to show everybody this shit. It was like people in our neighborhood were like, Fuck, yeah. Yeah, bro. We've all got a chance, dude, right? Yeah, bro. And he bought them both Dacries one time, these girls. God bless them. And he came over and he was just fucking chilling in the street, and then he played back in black, and he fucking floored it, and both of them fucking tumbled right out of their fucking back. Yeah, dude. I think he left town. He was so ashamed, just the fucking amount of shame that people would have for shit. But God, that was fucking awesome, dude.

That sounds awesome.

Yeah, when the closest you could get to rock and roll is just some kid in the street was just throwing a fucking rock against a stop sign in here in that fucking thing. Yes.

The doors are rattling because the kids got fucking like three 18s in the trunk.

Some rock for five skates or whatever, and that bitch is just... The hub captured It's just fucking falling. The lights are breaking on the back. It's a brand new car. He gets two blocks. He gets pulled over for not having everything.

Oh, man.

It was quite a time, man. It was the best time.

Yeah, dude. You know what? That statement right there, that's one of the fucking coolest things ever. When people watch the dirt, that's one of the biggest things I hear from people. They're like, from the younger kids, they're like, Man, is that what it was fucking like? All this shit's real, right? I'm like, Yes. And I'm like, They'll never know. And that's what they say. They're like, We can't even imagine that. You can't do any of that stuff anymore. You guys just fucking... That part, it's a nice thing to hear, but it also bones me out because that was at a time where anything fucking goes, dude. Anything goes. There's There's no Instagram or people with cell phones taking pictures and ratting you out. Anything goes, dude.

And the moment had so much value because it was all you had. Yes. You weren't going to be able to relive it later. Maybe you get a still image, but the fucking moment. Dude. Now the moment, sometimes it's just like, even the moments, I'm fucking give up. It's like, I can't compete with the repetition of me that there is out there. That's what I so many times. Yeah, dude. Even storytellers had more value because you had to tell the story, dude. The best thing was I'd go somewhere, nothing would happen. I'd go to school the next day, and everything had happened. Yes. It was like, Fuck, yeah, dude.

Dude, the moment, bro.

Yeah. It was so cool.

Right? I guess we just got to keep making those moments.

Yeah, we got to do our best. And you do it by taking on a new marriage. That's seven years. That's congratulations, man. That's amazing. Oh, thanks, buddy. And building a new house. Yes. And keep trimming our trees down to keep the shit what we want that's important to us, like our sons and our music, and keeping a drive all the fucking stories as much as we can by sitting and talking with people about them. Yes. Thank you so much, Tommy. I appreciate it, man. It's nice to get to know you. And thank you for fucking just making me I'm fucking angry at everybody in my fucking neighborhood, dude.

In a fucking awesome way, dude.

Dude, I would sing Girls and then jerk off, and I'd be like, I feel like I just was on a date. It was just fucking awesome, dude. We heard Girls and we're like, We're going to get girls, dude. We never got girls, bro. But we fucking sang that shit, dude.

Dude, I fucking love you, man.

God, it was fucking good.

Fuck. Thank you for having me. I look forward to our friendship, man.

Thanks, man. You all want to come and see the trees, man.

Yeah, for sure, dude.

For sure. I'd love to. I'd love your wife makes me laugh so much. Her and Brittany Schmidt have a podcast. Bring it up right now. I just want to see it real quick. I have to have them come on sometime.

Are you having them come over here?

Yeah, sometime. Yeah, dude. When we get it, we need some fucking white bitches in here. Sorry. I'm talking about Brittany Smith. I'm not talking about your This is the worst podcast with Brittany Furland and Brittany Smith. Tommy Lee, thank you for everything, dude. Yeah, bro. I hope you stay alive for absolutely ever.

Fuck, yeah. Fuck, yeah. Likewise.

Now, I'm just floating on the breeze, and I feel I'm falling like these leaves. I must be cornerstone.

Oh, but when I reach that ground, this peace of mind I found I can feel it in my bones. But it's going to take.