I'm David Faria, a New Zealander accidentally marooned in America, and I want to figure out what makes this country tick. Back in episode 58, we went on a fairly strange journey looking into America's obsession with ice. Not about how America polices its border, but how it loves frozen water.

Now you're realizing the real reason for ice, which is to actually save money because it's cheaper to put ice in your drink than it is to fill it with booze or Coke.

In that episode, we went down a lot of icy rabbit holes, learning about Boston's Ice King and how America perfected the art of freezing food. It's to frozen food that we return today. Tonight, she's serving Swanson frozen dinners. She knows that Swanson dinners have the extras that give her family a good meal and give her a one-hour vacation with her family. Ever since the invention of the frozen TV dinner, America loves nothing more than having its food cool down until it's frozen frozen solid before heating it back up again. Over 80% of American households will eat frozen dinners this year, making the frozen food market worth over $65 billion. 650,000 Americans work in the frozen food industry, making sure a frozen meal is never very far away. Are you going to cook? Yeah, sure. I'm going to cook. You?

Oh, no. But what's for dinner?

Let's see. We've got fried chicken, turkey, It sounds very steak. So get ready to open your freezer to grab tonight's dinner, because this is the frozen foods episode. On just quickly, stick around after this episode because we have Calvin's second Lord of the Rings review. He'll be reviewing 2002's The Two Towers. Okay, on to frozen foods. Fly this, fly this, fly this bird.

Touchdown in America. Now, we went on a real journey in this episode, Monica.

We went out, we ate.

We ate. We ate. Oh, did we?

How are you feeling? Because the documentary involves us getting a lot of frozen food.

I'm excited to hear the innate excitement. I didn't expect. I was like, okay, I'll go meet David at the grocery store. We'll pick out some frozen food. We'll eat it. He'll try it. Fun. But once we were there, I've never been more excited in my life. Which grocery store did you guys go to? It's a generic grocery store that's not hoity-toity. It had the old classics, which was the point. Did not want to get the yummy New Age.

No fanciness. We went to a middle of the road. Could be anywhere in America, your middle of the road supermarket. Exactly. Rob, how do you feel about frozen food?

I don't really eat frozen food.

The least surprising answer you've ever given.

The The boys will eat it, though, when it's like we need a quick corn dog or something for them to eat.

Did you grow up with any frozen food in the family?

Yeah, I did. We had frozen pizzas and things like that. I had a good friend growing up that got Swansons delivered. I remember that being fancy, and they had the little mini pizzas that I loved. Are they bagel bitey? But they were pizza. They were like the Red Baren minis. Oh, I love Red Baren. But fancy with the square pepperoni. For sure. I thought they were rich because they had this frozen food delivered to them, and I always wanted to eat that pizza. They probably were.

Maybe. That is rich. There was a famous hot pie brand in New Zealand called Georgie pie, which is shut down Well, it was similar to McDonald's. You'd get a burger from McDonald's. If you wanted a meat pie, you'd go to Georgie pie. And we didn't have one in our town. And so my dad, he went to the big city of Auckland. He would just buy 50 Georgie pies, and then we would freeze them, and then we would detour them. And it was just the most exciting thing ever. My dad ruled.

Is now the time for us to tell people what happened?

No, we're going to get to that. Okay. It's a good tease, though.

But we've teased it also on Arm. We talked a little bit about what was going on.

There were some ethical quandries we faced. Yes. This documentary, this took place about a month ago now, and it began with you, Monica, looking absolutely miserable. It ended with you looking the most excited I've ever seen you look.

It was a Saturday or Sunday Sunday morning. Let's paint the picture.

As I mentioned earlier, back in episode 58, we looked at the origins of the frozen food industry in the United States. I met up with journalist Reid Mittenbouhla, author of a book called Bourbon Empire. Reid schooled me on how frozen food helped change the very fabric of America. So the frozen food and the way ice relates to frozen food really ties in, I think, America's pre-industrial the past. So you've got this era where the country is very agrarian, and you've got local markets for food, and everything's highly seasonal. And as soon as ice comes into the picture, you're able to ship food further. You're able to preserve it for longer. So it's changing America's diet. And it allowed the cities to explode in the US. Now, it's like you can move into the city and you can preserve food, and you can get stuff from markets that are further and further away. And so it really changed, I think, the landscape of America. So you see this transformation, and it is right around the middle of the 19th century, mid-1800s, when cities are really starting to explode and you start to see that transition from an agrarian to an industrial society.

So ICE played a huge part of that. So it really did transform the country. But to truly understand that transformation, I would have to experience it myself. I would need to embrace the frozen food section of my local grocery store. I also knew I needed a guide, Monica Padman. It was a Sunday morning, and I think probably both of us didn't really want to be at a grocery store right now, but we had a show to make. Hello. You look so lonely. Standing there. I wasn't even sure it was you.

I've been standing here for six minutes. I hated every second of it.

It makes you feel any better. On the way here, I rubbed sunscreen in my eyes and my eyes started crying, and it's been terrible for me as well.

Bad morning for all.

We walk inside the magical glass doors sliding open.

On first glance, how do you feel like an American grocery store smells versus a New Zealand grocery store?

I don't love the smell. I don't get any fresh bread smells. It feels very plastic. It feels like every food smell is sealed away.

I can tell. I mean, there is a distinct smell. Barbara Kingsolver, who we love, she wrote about how when she lands back in America, she recognizes how little smell there is here, that it's actually smellless.

I agree. The downside that New Zealand has, we have a problem recently with too many birds in the supermarket flying in. You get pigeons wandering around. And there's been an outburst of mice as well, which actually- That's really horrible.

In the grocery store- In our main grocery store, there's been a lot of mouse sightings.

David here chipping in from the edit room. I was wrong the mice. Turns out it was actually rats. Good evening. It started with one rat in a cabinet. Now, countdown's rodent problem is a lot worse. More than a dozen rats have been caught in the past 72 hours at a Dunedin Countdown Supermarket, and now a new video has emerged of a mouse crawling over an open bowl of salad in one of the chain's Christ Church stores.

I'm realizing I had a dream in anticipation for this. I had a nervous dream. I dreamt about chips and cheese I just saw the Cheez-its, and I just remembered that.

What was in the dream? Do you remember?

I don't remember.

But it was anxious.

I think I was anxious about this big jaunt we had today because I have to introduce you to a lot of things.

Monica and I have reached the frozen food aisle, or at least one of the aisles. It's overwhelming, but our trolley is ready.

I call them carts. You call them trolleys. That car is here. Yeah, cart.

It's overwhelming, but our cart is ready.

This is a big shopping trip because I I forgot about all this important stuff. Stoffer's French bread pizzas, you have to have that.

Okay, let's get one of these.

Let's get extra cheese.

I love pizza. I mean, I have just told you my cholesterol problem, but...

Oh, you're going to have to put that on the back burner for today. We're not even going to talk ice cream.

That's a whole separate episode, probably ice cream, right? Because it's an ice cream day here, so that's probably a whole other thing.

Oh, that's a good idea. That's a good idea. Okay, we're going to do Stoffer's French bread pizza, but we also have to do DiGiorno because have you heard, It's not delivery, it's DiGiorno? This is huge. It's not delivery, it's DiGiorno. I'm also seeing all these brands that are newer to me, so we're not going to do that. We're going to go classic.

Classic. I love Hawaiian style. Do you like pineapple?

You do love Hawaiian. Let's get Hawaiian for you.

Can you deal with pineapple, though?

Of course. And we should get rising crust. There's Stuff Crust, there's Rising Crust, there's thin crust, there's everything.

There are so many many types of crust and so many pizza brands, even Monica is intimidated by this task of just narrowing down what we're going to get.

Oh, but you also... Fuck. But how many... Okay, I just think you need pizza bites.

Okay, let's get pizza bites. I don't know what a pizza bite is.

Okay, there's corn dogs. Now, corn dogs were never my thing, so I'm not inclined to get it, but do you love a corn dog?

I like the corn dog we had at Disney. I think we should get a little Corn Dog.

Okay, here we are. Big area, Hot pocket.

Is Hot Pockets a brand or a type of food?

It's both. It's one and the same.

The Hot pocket looks like a little toasty snack.

It does, but I have to say, times have really changed. When I was young, there would have been almost as many hot pockets as there was that amount of pizza. It used to be so many flavors, so many kinds. Right now, all I see is four cheese pizza, Meatballs and mozzarella, ham and cheddar, pepperoni pizza.

That's it. The selection isn't huge. We've got four or five here. What do we pick?

What sounds best to you? Maybe we go ham and cheddar. That's classic. There's crispy buttery crust or croissant crust.

Which is the healthiest, do you think? We look at some of the calories. 280 per sandwich. The next type of sandwich, 280 as Well, so is the next one. They're all just 280 calories. My poor cholesterol.

Oh, no. I just realized something. I think there's another entire frozen food aisle.

Sounds American.

No, really? Because we're not even at the actual frozen foods. We're at general frozen foods, but there's frozen food meals that we have to get.

Suddenly, Monica's eyes go wide. She spotted the egos.

You need this. This is so American.

I feel like this is the Waffle you see at a motel breakfast.

Exactly. But better, a little more nostalgic.

When you're in a motel breakfast, you get the tiny muffin, a horrible coffee, plastic cutlery. Rough.

Okay. I do think we have to get a Marie Callender's pie.

That brand is a good one?

It's a very good. Also, Sarah Lee is classic. Also, the Pepperidge Farm chocolate fridge is classic.

You just grow up with all that. How do you all of this stuff? You're not eating the stuff now. So is this all from your- Childhood.

Yeah, I wonder that, too. I'm like, why do I know what everything tastes like?

There's nothing in here that you don't recognize, and that's just growing up in America.

Yeah. I don't think it's that every time we went to the grocery store, our cart looked like this. It couldn't happen.

Because it's like friends' houses as well, all that stuff.

Over time, I guess, one grocery trip, you get the chocolate satin pie. Then another time you get... I think we have to get Preference Farm chocolate fudge.

And we go on like this, freezer after freezer, aisle after aisle.

The Dino Buddies is very... It's like what you buy for kids, which you are one, so we might want to get that.

Our cart's actually getting quite full. So much cardboard packaging, so much frozen food.

Now, these are frozen berries, but I'm not interested in that.

I start to feel a little self-conscious. Even here in America, where frozen foods are an accepted part of life, people are passing by and I can see them judging our food selection.

So there's turkey sausage, the chicken maple, the Applegate chicken maple breakfast sausage is very good, but I don't think we have space for that. Stoffers, oh, my God, Swedish meatballs. We have to get the Swedish meatballs. Marie Callender's Salsbury Steak is number two on my list for when you think of the quintessential frozen foods. I think it was the original.

But this is a big deal. This is huge, okay?

Oh, my You know what you have to have? Fish sticks, if we can find them. That is so old school.

It goes on and on like this. Chicken pop pies, some lean cuisine frozen meals just to be healthy, some mac and cheese.

They brought back macaroni and cheese with broccoli. Oh, my God.

With broccoli.

I have to get it. Oh, my God. The macaroni and cheese with broccoli is extremely nostalgic for me because I spent all my summers with my grandparents. And so my grandma, she would make food, but we just have frozen food all the time. And one of my favorites was the macaroni and cheese with broccoli, but then it went away. It's very nostalgic.

When you'd eat that with your grand, would you all be around a table? Would you be in front of the TV? In front of the TV.

In front of the TV, we watched all her soap operas. She had four or five soap operas. We just sat in front of the TV and watched eight hours of television. And it was fine. No one even thought that was bad. What a life.

In all this, one mystery we can't solve. We can't find those fish sticks.

Here it is. Okay, breaded Fish. It's not really a fish stick, though. Oh, it's plant-based. No, no, no, no, no.

Thankfully, a staff member rescues us and takes us to a whole other section of frozen delights. I think we do have them. Maybe they're here. Where the fish sticks are stored. Oh, there they are. Okay, so he's led us to a seafood section, and here is just a whole lot of fish. Yes, fish sticks.

As he said, it's a childhood staple.

Fishy stick secured, our card is full, and it's time for the checkout. We look like doomsday preppers, and we make a bet on what this will cost us. I estimate this is going to cost 200 on the dot for me.

Really? Okay, I'm going to I'd say 275.

Do you ever get swayed by things at the checkout, all the gum and the chocolate?

Yes, I do. Almost always the gum.

I always end up with a Snickers bar. Lining up, the woman in front of us actually seems quite delighted in our selection. She's giggling to herself. I saw you eyeing up our trolley. Are you jealous of our... No, I just like what's going on here. Me and Monica are living the American dream, a dream where everything is frozen, soon to be put in the microwave and turned into a delicious meal fit for a king or maybe a queen. What do you think of all this? You got everything frozen, right? Yeah. Looking up, I see the man helping bag our food is the same delightful staff member who helped us locate those fish sticks. He told us he's a big frozen food fan himself before sharing about his frozen food hack when he has friends over.

We worked at a very fancy restaurant in San Francisco.

And so after this party, and I bought snack pack pudding. Do you know what that is? No.

Well, it used to come in little metal cans, and it was just a little pudding about the size of cat food. But I put them in ceramic things as if it was fancy, and I mixed it with some whipping cream, put whipping cream on top.

It's so to creme.

It's so delicious. It's almost better than Zunis, which is where we work. And I was like, Oh, I can't tell you.

It's my own little secret.

But it was snack pack.

You're the best. Thank you for helping us. Things packaged up, we pay, which raises the big question, how much did we pay? Who won the bet?

All right, David, I have a big reveal.

Okay, you have the receipt of how much this costs. I have the receipt.

We have four huge bags of food, and this costs us $157.47..

That is actually incredible.

I know.

I feel this could last for the year. I think so. We answer the question of why people like frozen food, right?

Exactly, because it tastes good and it's affordable.

You sounded so- Manic. Hoped out of your mind in manic.

I know. You edited so much out. I mean, I think really I sounded crazier than I even came across.

Yeah, it was. I got the transcript because whenever I do these episodes, I get half an hour of audio. I put it through, and this transcript was about five times longer than a typical transcript. You were excited. It was cool to see.

We didn't touch on the Stoffer's lasagna, which was a big part of our time at the grocery store.

Oh my God. The lasagna was there.

Because we got a couple of family-size items. One was the Stoffer's lasagna, the other was Sofa's mac and cheese, not with broccoli. Then I bought an individual Sofa's mac and cheese with broccoli. There was a lot going on.

This is perspective. When you think back to that shopping trip, because obviously I go back and I get this audio and I chuck some things out, I put some things in. Did I roughly capture the energy of that trip, do you think?

I think you did. Like I said, I think if anything, you subdued it. It was a high, high experience.

If anyone that's listening to this is one of those people that puts their podcast on double speed, this is where they would have had to hit regular speed because I cannot follow what you're saying.

And we got the chicken nugget. We did so much that day. Bts, both of us walked to to the grocery store.

That's right.

We didn't think about it.

There was a slight moment at the checkout. It was all these bags of frozen food that's now dethoring no car.

I thought, I was like, we'll have two bags. That's easy to carry. No, we had enormous bags, four of them.

So many. I waited with the frozen food. They're looking like a lunatic, this massive trolley of frozen food. I talked to a few more people as they came and went. People really liked what we'd done. You got the car and you kindly stored all of this in your freezer.

I did. And there are pictures, and we will post the pictures. Yeah.

It looked like an amazing... It really made your freezer look. It was a vibe.

It was. I removed everything else from my freezer to put our contents in to fit it all. It was a puzzle. It was very fun.

Also, it was really affordable, under $200 for so much stuff. You can see why it is a popular choice.

Well, we spoke to the woman who was ringing us up. We asked her, Does anyone do this, what we are doing today? Do you ever see this? And she said, Yes, a lot of older people buy purely frozen foods because it's easy and highly nutritious. Probably less trips to the grocery store. Yeah, exactly.

Yeah, it just sorts them out, right? And there is the other thing when you're old, and this is really very accurate, but I feel like me freaking out about my cholesterol, right? I'm going to be really careful. I think when you're old, you're like, you don't give a shit. How much damage can you do in your final five years of life? It's true.

I'm hoping to only eat Stofer's mac and cheese with broccoli.

This is like a flash forward into the future. Stay tuned for more Flightless Bird. We'll be right back after a word from our sponsors. Flightless Bird is supported by Quince. I've always wanted a little Puffer jacket. And thanks to Quince, I now own one. And when it gets cold, which is going to be New Zealand in a month, I'm going to be wearing it there.

Oh, cute. I do love Quince, especially for something like a Puffer. It's It's like a statement piece. It's a little bit like, you might not know how long you're going to wear that. I don't know. It's seasonal. And Quince is perfect for an item like that because it really is really well made. Everything I see on there looks so good. It looks very luxury, but it's at an affordable price point. So you're not going to break the bank on something that you might only wear a couple months out of the year.

A hundred %. And obviously, here in the US, it is summer. I've just also picked up some shorts for walking I'm always hiking. I'm not going to be wearing my Puffer jacket whilst hiking, but I am going to be wearing my Quince shorts.

Quince offers a range of must-have items like a hundred % European linen under $50, which is an incredible deal. Luxurious Mulberry silk skirts, and they have these really nice Italian leather handbags. They have 14 karat jewelry from $30. I mean, this is a great place to go get stuff for yourself and get stuff for others.

As far as how they keep the prices down, they partner directly with top factories to cut out the cost of the and pass the savings on to you. Upgrade your closet this summer with Quince. Right now, go to quince. Com/bird to get free shipping and 365 day returns on your next order. That's quince. Com/bird for free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince. Com/bird. This episode of Flightless Bird is brought to you by booking. Com, booking. Year. It's finally time for summer travel, and I am pumped because I like traveling. I like traveling for myself, and I like traveling for this show.

Yes, it is so fun. I do get very excited about summer travel.

Which is your favorite place to travel to in America that's not going home? Where would you... New York. New York.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think I am going to go back in the summer. Very exciting.

Booking. Com offers so many possibilities across the US for all the travelers you want to be. Booking. Com's wide breadth of places to stay across the US make booking whoever you want to be this summer so, so easy. From family friendly vacation homes to picturesque villas. There are so many great choices on Booking. Com. So what are you waiting for? This summer, you can book whoever you want to be on Booking. Com. Booking. Yeah. Check out Booking. Com to book today. Of course, all this raises a question of what we were going to do. We had a whole plan. With all this frozen food. Oh, yeah, we had a plan. Back when we were shopping, Monica had made a statement.

I'm not eating any of this.

But that was before that wonderful staff member told us he had tricked his friends into thinking frozen foods was something fresh that he had cooked up in his kitchen.

It's a code of crime. So delicious. It's almost better than Zunis, which is where we work. And I was like, oh, I can't tell you.

It's my own little secret, but it was snack packed. You're the best. Thank you for helping us. And with that, an idea was born. Monica would throw a dinner party at her house with just the frozen foods we'd purchased. As I arrived at her house, I was hit with the smell of, well, a lot of things, almost as if someone had bought a whole cart full of frozen foods and was cooking it all at once.

These, I think, are overdone because I did two.

They smell great.

No, I'm going to re… We have more. Thank God. This is a disaster. This is the worst dinner party I've ever had.

Monica was stressed. There were cardboard boxes everywhere, plates and trays over every surface. Monica was between an overworked oven and an overworked microwave, stopping occasionally in brandishing a fork, violently stabbing the plastic wraps that covered many of the frozen food meals. You've got fish sticks here?

Fish sticks. These are the fish sticks. They're going to go in the oven now. They're going to go in for 12 minutes.

A few days earlier, I'd pitch the idea of not telling our guests it was frozen food, pretending it was Monica's cooking. But things have changed. Now, we were originally thinking of not telling your guests about the fact that it was going to be just frozen food.

We were tricking everyone. I even told the whole audience. I was Alex and Roman's guest for her podcast Live Show, and I told the whole audience what we were doing.

How did that go across?

I think that's where I was like, This is unethical.

You could feel people going, oh.

Yeah, I could. Also because some of these people, they keep texting and they're like, Can't wait to eat your food. Oh, my gosh. So excited. I'm excited. Monica's cooking. It felt wrong.

You're an ethical person, and I'm not. That's what it comes down.

I know that I was. I'm actually disappointed in myself and how ethical I ended up being because it would have been fun.

You've got a few things going at once at different times. I hope you've got this under control. I don't.

There's a lot to juggle. I think the pizza bites are going to be ready in a second.

Our guests are arriving, and so I leave Monica to her misery to go and keep them company. Jess and Liz are sitting on a couch, and Eric has just arrived as well. And her and Anna are looking either excited or scared. I'm not sure which. So you were just saying when I walked in, you didn't grow up on frozen foods.

No, I lived in Sweden from 1980 to 1987.

That explains it. You weren't in America. But then in America, even in Burbank, I didn't have frozen foods a lot.

Celeste Pizza was my frozen pizza that I remember liking it extra well done crispy in the microwave.

Liz, what's your relationship with frozen food? My relationship with frozen food.

My relationship with frozen food, I think, is healthy. I grew up in Canada. For me, it was a coming back home from school situation. We would have Michelinas. If it was in the freezer, it would get in. Curly fries, very prized possession, very important. And pizza. But again, it wouldn't stay very long in the freezer because we would just eat it because it's delicious.

If you went on a date and someone was going to cook you dinner on the date and they did everything that's frozen food, how would feel about that?

I would hope they were honest about it and we would laugh about it and then we would make out.

I turned to Anna, who I've decided is definitely looking scared.

Well, I never had it growing up.

When did you grow up?

Venezuela. I feel bad saying this, but we judge it a little bit. Our culture, we cook a lot. Everything's homemade. I eat everything but frozen food. It's just kidding.

Tonight, it is like you've walked into a small nightmare.

Yeah, but I'm excited. That lasaña smells very good.

I was trying to get Monica not to tell any of you what was happening, just like Monica. That crash was Monica dropping something. To be fair, while we've talked in the lounge, she's been dealing with about 20 frozen meals in the kitchen, an oven and microwave working over time. Some things are in for two minutes, others 13, others 25. It's chaos.

The biggest cooking nightmare to date It's frozen food. It's frozen food.

Anyway, I didn't want her to tell you what was happening. The idea was for her to disguise the fact it was frozen.

Monica's food is incredible. Then what would we do? I've eaten lasagna that Monica made before.

Can you say that's going to be different to the beautiful frozen lasagna we're going to have tonight? I think so.

It might be nostalgic.

What's your relationship with frozen food? What's your opinion of it? Because it's a big part of being an American is that frozen food aisles.

That's a big part of my life. So as a child, for sure. My mom's an incredible cook, but there was definitely fish stick night. I'm the oldest kid of four. We for sure had frozen fish sticks. My brother is now in the food industry, and they interviewed him about something, and he said something about how he ate a lot of fish sticks, and my mom was so offended. So now I'm doubling down. I'm so sorry, mom.

Is it about the fish stick?

I don't know. I think they're delicious.

Is it like mashed up fish in a stick? Yeah.

Telapia, like a light fish, and then you're going to dip it in ketchup or tartar sauce. And then as an evolved woman, now I would not eat those. But I serve my kids frozen food almost every night.

We talk about frozen food a lot. At one point, debating if fresh vegetables or frozen vegetables are the most healthy. Liz finds a website that claims freezing produce at its peak ripeness preserves nutrients, ensuring you get the maximum nutrient nutritional value.

I guess fresh food is not as good as I think it is.

With that, Monica walks in, announcing our frozen dinner extravaganza is ready.

Frozen dinner. People should start. Put a little pop pie. Put a little tiny plate together. Oh.

Picture this, a beautiful dining room, a long table set with exquisite napkins, candlestick holders, and cutlery were surrounded by beautiful art. And laid out on the table, nothing but plate after plate of recently unfrozen food.

It has an esthetic to it, though, right? I'm into it. It harkens back to a simpler time.

Thinking back to that ICE episode 58, it does harken back to a simpler time. This is Reid talking, that journalist I told you about who researched the history of ice. So the frozen food and the way ice relates to frozen food really ties in, I think, America's pre-industrial past. So you've got this era where the country is very agrarian, and you've got local markets for food, and everything's highly seasonal. And as soon as ice comes into the picture, you're able to ship food further. You're able to preserve it for longer. So it's changing America's diet. And it allowed the cities to explode in the US. West. Now it's like you can move into the city and you can preserve food and you can get stuff from markets that are further and further away. So you see this transformation, and it is right around the middle of the 19th century, mid-1800s, when cities are really starting to explode and you start to see that transition from an agrarian to an industrial society. So ICE played a huge part of that. So it really did transform the country. Here we are in that transformed country about to treat our taste buds.

I was asking Monica about what wine pairs with this food.

Do you have any answers? So we go white, red, sparkling?

She had a nice white wine that would pair with this chicken pot pie.

And yeah, we feast. Okay, you're in the chicken pot pie.

I can taste this before I'm even putting it in my mouth. This breading is going to be so soggy and so delicious with this.

The chicken pot pie is good. It's creamy. That looks like the sloppiest steak of ever the same.

That doesn't look like me. It's a Salisbury steak. I thought this was going to be a mozzarella stick, and it was a fish steak.

I need to douse it down with some lasagna. What's the ego?

Lego my ego.

What does that even mean?

You let go of it. Somebody, as soon as When it pops out of the toaster, somebody's going to take it. One of your siblings, your dad is going to take a bite. These are the commercials. The kid puts it in there and it pops up and the dad walks by and wants to take a bite. Lego my ego. Hey, Lego my ego. Lego my ego, Jessica.

I'm not quite sure if it's the carbs or the sugar or maybe those frozen vegetables, but things are getting lively.

Pizza in the morning, pizza in the evening, pizza at supper time. When you mix us on a bagel, you can eat pizza anytime.

What the fuck was that? In the morning, pizza, evening, pizza at supper time.

Oh, my God.

So the ads are imprint for some of these products. Oh, my God. Absolutely.

And hot pockets. Those in the fridge. That's right.

As well as a lot of singing, there's also a lot of nostalgia. Nostulture that's been frozen for decades, now defrosted and unleashed. Erica remembers how when she was a kid, their family had an extra freezer in the garage just to cope with all the frozen food. You grew up with a big, like an extra freezer?

Extra freezer in the garage full of these bagel bites. Because I'm the oldest of four and we were a hangout house. My mom would cook nice meals, but then this would be like your friends are over and we're going to put tons of those in and everybody's going to eat bagel bites.

So you weren't preppers. It was more just you had a lot of people around. I did grow up Norman, so we weren't not preppers. It's a really, really great night. These foods have unleashed a lot of memories. And yeah, more singing.

This is another classic Stover's Mac and Cheese. Stofer's, nothing comes closer to home. Oh, shit.

I think that's right. Go again?

That was a good pitch, too. Do it. You got to learn it, too. Stofer's, nothing comes closer to home. Nailed it. This is showcased in Home Alone. Kevin makes a Stoffer's Mac and cheese that he bought himself at the grocery store.

Our massive skeptic down the end How do you feel and what did you make of the night?

I feel my cholesterol going up a little bit. Just kidding. No, just kidding. I actually didn't hate it. I feel good. Fish sticks are a big no. The pot pie is a big no. And the rest of it, it's okay.

Amazing.

The pot pie is the only thing that's gone. To be fair, it's the only thing that's totally gone.

Over those two hours, we spent feast and talking and laughing. I think I realized what makes frozen food so important for Americans. Sure, it's nostalgia and it's efficiency and speed. It's a warm, quick meal on the table. But more than anything, it's the fact that all of those things have been an unchanging, reliable part of American life for decades now. The same tastes, the same reliable food, just ready to go whenever you are. Like a warm meal, even one that was frozen 20 minutes ago, that's really comforting.

Some things don't change in an ever-changing world. It's nice. I feel good. I feel like I've returned home. I like it. I like what we did today. Will our fingers be swollen tomorrow? Is the question. Well, mine will because I burned them off.

You did burn. It hurt. If you think, yeah. You were just racing around baking so much stuff.

Well, I think I definitely underestimated how difficult it would be to juggle the cooking of all of these things.

Yeah, well, everything has a different time. Yeah, different time, different temp. And there's limited space.

Did you have 11 timers going? No, I was- You were mentally calculating it all. I was, but I got a little willy-nilly. Because ultimately, it's cooked. We're just heating shit through.

Yeah, there's no danger. Exactly. Now, Rob, you were invited, I'd like to say. You, for some reason, weird. You had something on. Did you?

I have two children. It was not a- No. He abandoned ship.

You missed a delicious spread. And listening back to that, much like you in that grocery store, everyone got so high and so happy.

They really did. There is something beautiful about nostalgia across the board, right? Whether it's food or songs or anything, the transport from adult to kid is a lovely, lovely thing.

I think it was Jess that mentioned it as well, that the neat thing is the recipes for a lot of this stuff hasn't changed. And it's like you are unfreezing literally what you ate 30 years ago. It's the same thing. And that's something I hadn't really clocked. That's amazing. And so you are transported back through taste and smell to childhood. And people were coming up with stories from their childhood and the songs that stuck.

Yeah, it was incredible. Update, Jess, after that meal- The fish stick disaster. Oh, yeah. Okay. So the fish sticks were a problem, one, because I didn't have ketchup, which I could not believe.

Shocking, shocking.

That was shocking. And they're required to eat with ketchup. Okay.

You need to dip them.

Yes. You need to dip them. And unfortunately, the fish sticks have gotten much fishier, which means they're using probably real fish as as opposed to whatever crap we were eating. But the more real it was, the less good it was.

It hit hard. And I think there's that thing with fish for me. I feel if it's not fresh, I get a bit scared. That fishy smell, that was hitting all of us.

That scared us a bit. Is Jess okay? Yeah. No. Update the next day. He's dead. We haven't heard from Jess since then. He's doing great. Haven't heard from him. No, he went back and he bought the chicken nuggets and he bought the pop pie.

Get out. Oh, so he wanted... Because he was playing it a bit coy.

Exactly.

He was, right?

He was acting like he was above it a little bit, even though there's no one less above anything in this world than Jess. So I was like, What are you doing? You're playing a little game with us. And I was- Completely right.

I was right. That chicken pot pie was the only thing that vanished completely. I was shook by the Salisbury steak. The whole time, I thought it was a solid bit of sinewy-chewy steak that had frozen. It's like a small sausage texture.

Sausagey meatloathe.

Yeah, and it was delicious. The sauce. I loved all of it. It was all frigging delicious.

What was your favorite?

Chicken pop pie. Okay, yeah. The mac and cheese with Brock That was great. And I love that healthy, healthy broccoli in there. No, I mean, mac and cheese is one of my favorite things about the United States. I'll get it whenever I can. And it's just so, so, so, so good. And my It's a fresh chicken pop pie.

I get it. And what about DiGiorno?

Love the DiGiorno. I mean, the only thing in there that I think I struggled with was probably the fish sticks for the reasons we've mentioned. And just the being too much good food there. I couldn't eat it all. There was too much.

I also did make another blunder. I didn't dethaw the desserts, which was the satin cake and the Pepperidge Farm chocolate cake. I didn't know that I had to dethaw them.

Okay, so while you bring this up, I snuck away while you guys were chatting and had a bit of a chew on those half frozen- You did. Treats, and they were really good.

Even half frozen? Yeah. Okay.

Cool. Yeah. A little hack. I don't think they need to be completely dethawed. They just tasted nice and cold. It washed down the saltiness of all the other foods.

I will say that is the remaining flavor at the end of the night is salt. There is so much salt in those.

I woke up at about three in the morning and I was just so thirsty. Yeah, I like big glass of water. It was really gnarly.

Yeah. Did you get into any of the nutritional value of frozen food? Because what I've heard is that when you freeze it, it loses its nutritional value.

A lot of the websites were like, as far as the vegetables go, it says it's all good. It almost can be better because you're getting at it. At its peak. At its peak.

And PFAS. We talk a little bit about the Forever chemicals. I haven't done research on this, but I have heard that frozen frozen vegetables actually have lower forever chemicals than definitely canned. I think some people were saying real vegetables because you do have to be sprayed and stuff with all of those chemicals.

It does sound like we're in the pockets of big frozen food.

I'm happy to be in the pocket.

But if anyone is listening to this who is a nutritionist or a scientist and has any first-hand info on the nutritional value, I'd love to hear from you. Just slide into our DMs.

I've heard that, but I don't know if it comes from a scientist.

Yeah, this was an episode where we just ate and felt good about ourselves.

It was so fun.

It was really fun. I would go back for more.

Great. I'll do another dinner party. In retrospect, I'm sad we couldn't execute the trick.

The trick.

But also- Repating some of these delicious items. I just think the Dino-shaped nuggets, how would we have- You should have got Dino cookie cutters and like, sprinkle them around the house.

It's so beautifully done.

We had them out. The fish sticks from scratch.

There is a certain quality of frozen foods. You know it when you try it, right? I think it wouldn't have worked.

The only thing I could have potentially got away with is the lasagna, making the lasagna, putting it into a different dish. Maybe the mac and cheese, but other than that, I don't think so. Bagel bites. I made my own bagel bites. You should do that next, though. Do a party where you recreate the impossible frozen ones.

That would be fun. Oh, like a heightened version of what we had. That would be fun. That would be really good. I suggest it as a fun night, just as an adult, do a frozen food night. It was a really good time. It sounded like we were all drunk. We weren't. That was just the high of having frozen foods, and it was just a really good night. So thanks for hosting us. Of course. I hope your place didn't stink out too much.

No, it smelled perfect. Okay, great. Smell perfect, tasted perfect. Yeah, I recommend a frozen food night.

And I would argue, when I was full of all that frozen food, I would say I was almost 100 % American. Physically, I was full of all this American food.

And you really clicked into the... You heard some nostalgic stories of American- It's really nice.

You have nice friends as well. Good crew. Thank you. Really good crew. I agree. I agree. Thanks, Monica. Bye.

What did we just watch? The Lord of the Rings, the two towers. What happened? There was a war, and they're getting ready for the war, and they're trying to break the ring into the volcano, and they're getting ready for the war. Who's the war between? The Orcs and the Good Guys. Who are the Good Guys? There's elves, there are hobbits, and there's men. Who's your favorite? The elves. Do you have a favorite elf? I forgot the name, but I'd call it Lego. Legooss. He had Lego in it. What else happened in this movie? They were in the mountains, and they found when they're sleeping, there's the Golem, and he was trying to steal the ring. What were the other hobbits doing? The hobbits were with the trees, and they're speaking to them so they can help them win the war. But there's going to be a bigger war, and at the end, the bad guys were going to try to kill the Golem when he was good. And He said, No, wait. Can I talk to him? Then he said, Come here, Master. Then the Golem said, Right now. I said, Come here. I'm your master.

Master needs you. Then he came, and then he just grabbed them. Now he thinks he tricked him. Now he's trying to kill him, and then he'll have the ring. Tell me about Golem. Golem? He's trying to sneak around and say, He's bad. Let's get the precious and kill him. The good Golem say, No, no. Master's good. Master is good. We will not kill Master. Do you remember what the good column's name is? The good one is Smegle. Did you like this one better than the first one? Yes, because there were a big war, and we saw the volcano What's the significance of the volcano? There's these dragons, and there's these guys with Noah, that there's these ghosts, and guarding it with dragons. I think I'm going to like the third one the most. Why is that? Because it's going to have a volcano, and it's going to be the main thing. Okay. Is there anything else you want to say before we go? Like and subscribe. My name's Calvin. I can subscribe. Bye.